3 years ago
The Importance of Discretion

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We all know Sugar and discretion go hand-in-hand, but many times people forget what that truly means. Discretion is not only important, but vital if your Sugar Daddy is currently married or holding an executive position. It is a key component for the success of an arrangement, and your Sugar Daddy will greatly appreciate it! Let’s break down dating discretion for people who are newly introduced to the wonderful land of Sugar and spice.

Technology Troubles

Timing is everything. Be aware of the proper time to call or text. If your Sugar Daddy is married, the weekend may be off limits. Keep texting to a minimum during these times. Dinner time is also probably a no go. Also, don’t over text. You don’t want to seem desperate for your Sugar Daddy’s attention.

Lovers Locations

When you are scheduling dates with a married Sugar Daddy, pick locations carefully. Steer clear from anything that is too close to the office or his home. You wouldn’t want to bump into someone who knows he is married, or worse, his wife! Pick cozy, intimate spots for a more secluded and romantic meet up. Yelp reviews on local venues can be your best friend!

Solid Storytelling

You and your Sugar Daddy should agree on a particular background story in case you have a run in with someone you both know. Decide as to why you are your Sugar Daddy are in a particular place, to avoid any awkward silence in case you do bump into someone. You should be able to effortlessly explain your presence.

Your Lips Are Sealed

If your arrangement is one that is hush-hush, make sure to keep it separate from your other personal affairs. Don’t blab intimate details of the relationship to friends and family. Make sure you talk openly with your Sugar Daddy before you suffer from word vomit.

Discretion can make a Sugar relationship even sweeter. Following the rules of discretion will make your Sugar Daddy realize you are committed to making your arrangement work, and that you respect him and his precious time.

What other tips for discretion do you follow?

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470 Responses to “The Importance of Discretion”

  1. flyR says:

    “”Prostitute probably. Perhaps that is the difference between a Prostitute and an SB.””

    The prostitute only looks for the overwhelming reasons not to be with a man – physical harm, theft, etc. The SB looks for positive reasons to be with a man whom she would probably not date IRL .

  2. DorkyGuy says:

    FYI, The Sessions: It is based on a true story of a disabled man confined to a bed, who survives on an iron lung, and a sexual surrogate (Hunt) who introduces him to sex. It also has William H. Macy, who did a great job.

  3. “I wonder if this revelation really requires celibacy. Afterall, there exist SBs and if one keeps them in their proper place all is well.”

    Lol! You’re just going all-in, aren’t ya?

  4. Alexis says:

    “Validation and insecurity are two separate issues…”

    Perhaps they are. I’ll need to more heavily think about this statement.

    “After the fiasco I had with my ex-SB/GF last year, it did pop into my mind whether I seek female company due to any sense of insecurity, so I decided to be celibate for a year. My life became much more abundant and much happier without female drama wasting my time solving their problems…”

    I wonder if this revelation really requires celibacy. Afterall, there exist SBs and if one keeps them in their proper place all is well.

  5. Nicegirl says:

    Kms… Yes, I forgot about that one… he was the SD and Keatons daughter the SB lol

  6. Kms2014 says:

    Oh, that is a good movie…Like Jack Nicololson movies, too, especially, many quirky roles, like ‘About Smitdt’ and he just says what he thinks without a filter and like his attitude. He might be a proper jerk in real life, but his film persona seems pretty cool. Chinatown was good…and there is another movie where he has a young girlfriend, and only dates really young girls, but has a heart attack while they are trying to have sex…then he dates Diane Keaton? Cannot remember that one…he has played the older guy that gets younger women a lot. Can see why younger women were attracted to him….he looked very fun to be around.

  7. Hey friends, virgin blog…

  8. Rachel SB says:

    @gentle(man)soul – for me, I have had feelings for SD’s, but not love. There is no room for love in a SB/SD relationship. Mine start out neutral on first EMAIL or I already don’t like them. If they didn’t take the time to read my profile – strike one AND two. I’m going to digest your profile before I decide whether to respond or not, so in my mind why shouldn’t you give me the same courtesy?

    The men that I have had a SB/SD relationship with by the time we have met, I KNOW if this is something I’m willing to move forward with. Translation, if I’m meeting you, you have already piqued my interest and “turned me on” mentally which is primary for me. In my situation it’s probably because my past SD’s were very thoughtful and articulate in their initial emails. They were clear and open about themselves as well as what their REALISTIC expectations were (expectation set within 2 emails). Mine were also outside of 60 mile radius so we emailed a few times (3 – maybe 4) prior to meeting to make sure we weren’t wasting time.

    We never pushed sex, we let it happen naturally, but I have to admit, I’ve had to hold myself back (blushes). When I find an amazing “connection” (I hate that word) and I meet the POT and he’s exactly as I’ve seen and spoken/read I get excited. I know some of the other SB’s here have forced themselves to slow it down, and some have failed… we’ve joked about it!

    I would say my SB/SD relationships become amazing friends with an equally amazing sexual pull. I love having that sexual tension and the mental connection all the time with my SD. I prefer only ONE SD. I have a moral dilemma over having multiples. I feel I can’t give my SD the attention he deserves and needs if I’m juggling. However, if I’m seeing him only once in a while I might ask his opinion on the matter. Not due to money, I’ve had mentor SB/SD relationships too.

    This is getting too long, in short – the relationship progresses like… a relationship. No one is pressured or forced into the physical aspect. However, if feelings of love come up, the arrangement is terminated immediately. And I make this CLEAR in the beginning. I will not fall in love with you, and you, you may not fall in love with me (although I’ve had to terminate and arrangement because I broke my own rule before). In my arrangements, we are not looking to change anyone’s current life, we just want to add to it. This is an arrangement, not a quest for love and marriage… that’s a different website. :)

  9. Nicegirl says:

    Helen Hunt also falls for Jack Nicholson in as good as it gets and he is an older recluse with severe obsessive compulsive disorder…until he tells her that her dress looks like a housecoat… not a good comment to make to a woman when you are out on a date ;o)

  10. Kms2014 says:

    Hmm, I used to love most movies with Helen Hunt..will have to check out ‘The Sessions’…

  11. Nicegirl says:

    @ygbkm… “the thought of being touched by someone I’m not attracted to is like slime on my skin. No thank you, please.”

    So true, attraction is a weird thing and sometimes unexplainable.

  12. “DorkyGuy says:
    September 24, 2014 at 11:06 am
    @Nicegirl- I don’t buy that the physically unattractive are without hope. Hopefully sugar will help inspire a SB to look for the positives in the man and ignore the negatives. Focus on things that attract her, even if it is mainly his mind or heart.

    I think “The Sessions” with Helen Hunt has an interesting exploration of the topic.

    Of course if he is also an awful person, this does not apply.”

    There are many things that can be repulsive about a person. Even if it’s not physical repulsion, the thought of being touched by someone I’m not attracted to is like slime on my skin. No thank you, please.

  13. “Nicegirl says:
    September 24, 2014 at 10:50 am
    I don’t think any amount of money in the world would make me be with a man I found disgusting…That thought alone is disgusting and I feel badly for both the SD (that he would want to pay a woman that he knew thought he was gross) and the SB (who thought so little of her self worth that she would be with someone she thought was gross for a paycheck). I am not sure which one is more unfortunate.”

    Indeed

  14. Nicegirl says:

    @DorkGuy – I don’t think anyone is without hope and who is to determine what is unattractive? I completely agree with Rachael in that a mans mind is what makes him attractive. Haven’t we all met a man or woman that initially we thought we wanted to know because they were outwardly attractive, until we actually got to know them and realized they were not that great after all?

  15. Rachel SB says:

    @gentle(man)soul – I think you found the next blog topic!!!

    “How many of you Sugars feel Love for your SD/SB ? I think we all would agree that we “Like” our Sugars ,else wise we would be Pros or Johns -right ? Or we don’t feel disgust -yet . Are we neutral at 1st ? Many new liaisons are 1 or 2 dates long when the cherry is popped -No ? So we feel —what ? Excitement about a new relationship ? Anticipation about exploring a new body/mind ? Sugaring is all about fast forwarding a relationship long before true feelings can evolve . Perhaps the best we can hope for at first is to fall in Like enough to fall in bed with that person .”

  16. DorkyGuy says:

    @Nicegirl- I don’t buy that the physically unattractive are without hope. Hopefully sugar will help inspire a SB to look for the positives in the man and ignore the negatives. Focus on things that attract her, even if it is mainly his mind or heart.

    I think “The Sessions” with Helen Hunt has an interesting exploration of the topic.

    Of course if he is also an awful person, this does not apply.

  17. gentle(man)soul says:

    @ALL

    How many of you Sugars feel Love for your SD/SB ? I think we all would agree that we “Like” our Sugars ,else wise we would be Pros or Johns -right ? Or we don’t feel disgust -yet . Are we neutral at 1st ? Many new liaisons are 1 or 2 dates long when the cherry is popped -No ? So we feel —what ? Excitement about a new relationship ? Anticipation about exploring a new body/mind ? Sugaring is all about fast forwarding a relationship long before true feelings can evolve . Perhaps the best we can hope for at first is to fall in Like enough to fall in bed with that person .

    So ,SBs want Allowance from someone you don’t have disgust for , and SDs want sex from someone–well ,anyone HAHA

  18. Rachel SB says:

    WOW! Where to start?
    NC Gent and NiceGirl – I agree with both of you. I do have to add that I for example cannot be with a man I do not find attractive. However, my version of “attractive” seems to be night and day from others. I find intelligence to be very attractive and sexy. I don’t care if you are overweight, scrawny, excessively tall or short, “hot” or not, etc. For me, it’s about the connection. This comment isn’t really for you (NC Gent you know my style!), but more-so for others out there (cough Jacob).

    Jacob, I am all for you finding your way to peace and harmony while weeding out drama. But, to insinuate that all we do is for validation is a bit overkill. In fact if you want to get technical, that could be considered drama in of itself. I think I know what you were trying to say, I think it came out wrong. Regardless, I’m glad you cut the bs drama out of your life, it must be much lighter now. I do not condone drama in my life at all, I don’t have the time for it and it just harbors negativity and slows down my progression for success. I get that you feel the same about it.

    Amazing how quickly the topic changes here!

  19. NC Gent says:

    Nicegirl — I would stop seeing my SB if I thought she wasn’t attracted to me. As you suggest, it would be pretty degrading for both of us.

  20. gentle(man)soul says:

    Nicegirl says:

    I don’t think any amount of money in the world would make me be with a man I found disgusting

    I agree . Who would do that ? A Prostitute probably. Perhaps that is the difference between a Prostitute and an SB. I like to think my SBs truly like me . And seldom is the time that I don’t feel “loved” . If I don’t then we will not work out .

  21. Nicegirl says:

    I don’t think any amount of money in the world would make me be with a man I found disgusting…That thought alone is disgusting and I feel badly for both the SD (that he would want to pay a woman that he knew thought he was gross) and the SB (who thought so little of her self worth that she would be with someone she thought was gross for a paycheck). I am not sure which one is more unfortunate.

  22. gentle(man)soul says:

    @ KMS
    “Not all men are seeking validation on SA…some just want easy access to pretty ladies with no dramas, or have kinks or certain desires that are not easy to find.”

    Bingo ! You are all trying to make it too complicated for the average SD .I believe I am typical for ,most SDs I am looking for :
    1)20 + yr old -can’t get one in the civi world
    2)guaranteed sexual performance -no excuses like Depression ,menses, Headaches
    3)limited time together -when I want her to go –go
    4)ready access -when I want her to come –she will LOL .
    5)friend -to communicate when we both want to–some only making a date,others all day long .

    IRL relationships are difficult and complicated -they take work –lots of it –as you married folks know . I want a sugar arrangement where we can skin the cream off the top of life . Why complicate it and make it something it doesn’t need to be ?

    @the old crew : welcome back !!!!

  23. FatB'StardSA says:

    Can you get validation even though you are giving an allowance? YES!

    The fact a SD can get a SB who thinks the SD is disgusting is a validation of the SD’s financial success. Why this is any less impressive than being “hot” is a mystery to me. I think a lot of SB’s get angry at their SD because being with the SD reminds them that their IRL BF/FB/whatever is not as amazing as she keeps telling her GF’s.

    @SD’s

    Next time a SB puts you down because you are not “hot” enough for her IRL remind her that neither she nor her IRL BF/FB/whatever will ever be a rich as you are. You will get called an asshole but it is worth it!

  24. Jacob says:

    Validation and insecurity are two separate issues . . . just as liking wine tasting doesn’t make one a drunk; liking tasting food and different cuisine doesn’t necessarily make one an obese pig.

    After the fiasco I had with my ex-SB/GF last year, it did pop into my mind whether I seek female company due to any sense of insecurity, so I decided to be celibate for a year. My life became much more abundant and much happier without female drama wasting my time solving their problems (and I laughed off various drama attempts by my pre-teen daughter, ex-wife and mother; and they became happier because of my attitude too). Therefore, I have concluded that, hence forth, I will only tolerate a woman in my life and let her stay if she adds to my abundance, not subtracting from it. It’s just like investing in early rounds of financing a start-up: if there is no clear path to profitability, it’s not worth the time or money.

    BTW, above-rule does not only apply to biological women, but all persons who have been brought up without proper boundary-conditioning.

  25. Jacob says:

    @Dorkster

    Life is a game of probability and statistics. I will believe in unicorn when I see one 😉

  26. Alexis says:

    Such generalizations today, my goodness. No room on here for saposexuals or the like.

    Also, this validation thing, wth? Are human beings really that insecure?

    Ack, I’m awful. I already know the answer to that… my bad.

  27. I have a friend who had a loveship with a guy in his late 60’s when she was in her late 20’s. The two of them are great friends now. He is strikingly handsome, sweet, charming, stylish, polished, successful, and now in his early 70’s. I enjoy joining lunch outings with them. It’s an interesting and lovely dynamic that I appreciate. My friend is a lovely lady, refined with a global palette of interests. She keeps up with him on every level of various topics, interjecting fun and exciting things that he finds of interest enough to listen and engage intently. There exists a fun-loving, carefree yet sensual spark between the two, and I find that really lovely, fascinating, and appealing. I think that this type of connection can apply in a variety of ways along the demographic spectrum.

  28. “Josh says:
    September 24, 2014 at 6:19 am
    Re: Validation.

    I am trying to understand the phenomenon…

    When a random woman spreads her legs a man he feels validated?

    The hotter the woman, the juiced up the validation?

    Validated for what really?

    Josh says:
    September 24, 2014 at 6:47 am
    @FatB’StardSA

    I have always liked and enjoyed when 20-somethings spread their legs for me.

    Does that mean I felt “validated” and did not know it OR I am denying such “validation”?”

    Interesting concepts, Josh. I think that one feels validated when they are actually seeking validation. Or possibly, too, when given unsolicited validation.

    I think it’s partly to do with some of nicegirl’s and kms’ comments regarding security in one’s self, and in one’s ability. It becomes an embodiment that is beyond confidence. You attract certain people by your given, exercised and adaptive nature. In this sense, it comes by no surprise or validation that a certain type of person would attract a certain type of person, because well…why wouldn’t they?

    Jacob hit the nail on the head, then knocked it sideways…

    “September 24, 2014 at 8:08 am
    People are social animals. Validation is what both men and women seek [sideways here] when they look for jobs that pay more than minimum wage supplemented by food stamps; validation is what they seek every time they throw a party in the backyard and invite friends; validation is what they seek every time they buy a new car, as opposed to a 5yo Camry to get from point A to point B. [realigns the nail here]The key is not whether whether a person seeks validation, but rather whether the person can be content without constantly validated, or whether a person would refrain from making his/her own life miserable in the long run in order to get validation (i.e. avoiding overpaying for validation).

    Most women probably would not interact with men if there is no pay in one way or another, including helping her getting validation in front of her friends. [huh?] The very idea of propagandizing what “real SD’s should do” is simply a game trying to trigger men’s validation-seeking instinct and hoping to goad them into over-paying for validation. Most of those alleged guidelines are false.”

    How exhausting.

    Jacob, please put down the hammer. Can you think of other reasons why someone would look for jobs that pay more than minimum wage, throw a party in their backyard and invite friends, buy a new car instead of a 5 year old car, or extend generosity to someone they appreciate?

  29. DorkyGuy says:

    @Jacob~ Broad generalizations are always true.

  30. Jacob says:

    @NC
    Men are attracted to beauty, women are attracted to status (which can be a result of celebrity, wealth or physical appearance).

  31. NC Gent says:

    I agree NiceGirl — but when those three were in their 40s, many women in their 20s were attracted to them. It made it more socially acceptable to be attracted to them.

    Jacob — I think there are plenty of 20-somthings that would “sport fuck” men who look like Pitt, Clooney or Cruise when they were in their 40s, without celebrity status or wealth, those guys were considered straightup hot.

  32. I like that, nicegirl. Thanks for sharing :).

  33. Jacob says:

    Women in their 20’s do not want to fuck Clooney, Cruise or Pitt. They want to be seen as the one sleeping with Clooney, Cruise or Pitt; i.e. a form of validation. Ask Katie Holmes, or Nicole Kidman before her.

  34. Josh says:

    Jacob is drinking the good stuff again today. 😉

  35. Nicegirl says:

    @NC Gent – Unfortunately most men in there 40’s don’t look half as good as the celebrities named. I think they are in their 50’s in fact and spend a lot of time working on looking good and are blessed with good genes. I still believe that over time personality wins over looks. Not all good looking people are beautiful – this takes time and experience to realize

  36. Jacob says:

    People are social animals. Validation is what both men and women seek when they look for jobs that pay more than minimum wage supplemented by food stamps; validation is what they seek every time they throw a party in the backyard and invite friends; validation is what they seek every time they buy a new car, as opposed to a 5yo Camry to get from point A to point B. The key is not whether whether a person seeks validation, but rather whether the person can be content without constantly validated, or whether a person would refrain from making his/her own life miserable in the long run in order to get validation (i.e. avoiding overpaying for validation).

    Most women probably would not interact with men if there is no pay in one way or another, including helping her getting validation in front of her friends. The very idea of propagandizing what “real SD’s should do” is simply a game trying to trigger men’s validation-seeking instinct and hoping to goad them into over-paying for validation. Most of those alleged guidelines are false.

  37. NC Gent says:

    Heya Rachel SB — good to see all of the faces from the past! Maybe we can increase the signal to noise ratio here!

    There are women in their 20s that are legitimately attracted to older men. I think George Clooney, Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt made it more acceptable for younger women to be attracted to older men. Nonetheless, I am guessing it is still only about 5% of the 20-somethings that would want to IRL date men that are 45+.

  38. Nicegirl says:

    @FlyR

    “There’s no doubt that there are a number of SB’s who have a strong age preference. However, my real life experience is that in an “active” market there are a SB’s across a wide age range who are comfortable with someone over 45. Obviously others are not – perhaps 50% .”

    I think that same thing goes for SD’s preferring an SB in her early 20’s. I am no longer in my early 20’s but I am positive I am not only a better lover but I am better company than I was then. Not because I wasn’t interesting or didn’t like sex but I was inexperienced and learning about myself and others. I am now old enough to be sexy inside and out, confident enough to know what I like and not afraid to ask for it. I have been with a couple of men over the age of 45 and I found that they were more sexual in their minds than they actually were in real life. That was a bit of a let down because they were both very amazing men, just not amazing lovers ;( I am currently with a man that is 48 and he is as amazing in all aspects… and very generous with his time and with me which makes me feel special and wanted. This intern makes me what to fulfill any and all of his needs… even if they are out of my comfort zone, and sometimes they are. More SD’s should try to be like that and they may enjoy the ride just a little bit more ;o)

  39. Kms2014 says:

    Just my opinion again, but….There are the men who are secure and wealthy, who want pretty ladies by their side, or have a kink or two…so, they offer an allowance and have the woman around, when convenient for them, and in their terms, so they gift the women an allowance. However, then there are the men who really don’t want to give an allowance, they want it to be ‘real’ and be with women who they can never get(or, they think they could never get) in the regular dating/hooking up world. So, they start with an allowance with these women who are out of their league or whatnot, in the hopes that one day, she will still see him for him, even when he stops ‘paying’. They are trapped in a vicious cycle, in that their ego and need for this validation is always confused…’does she really want me, or is it the money?’ ‘Will she still hook up with me, if I don’t give her anything, or stop the allowance?’. These type of men are not good SD’s, in my opinion….as they are not really seeking a true SD/SB or benefactor dynamic where they truly care about their lady and want to mentor her, or further her life better financially. It is all about their ego, which is annoying. Sorry, but have had experience with this type of ‘SD’ before.

  40. Kms2014 says:

    Josh says:
    September 24, 2014 at 6:19 am
    Re: Validation.

    “I am trying to understand the phenomenon…

    When a random woman spreads her legs a man he feels validated?

    The hotter the woman, the juiced up the validation?

    Validated for what really?”

    In my opinion…It depends on the man, but generally the more insecure a man is, with this problem, then more validation he must get(constantly). Really insecure people with this issue can never be satisfied…must constantly have that validation. The same with women who constantly need to prove themselves and need compliments constantly, I guess….

    Do not understand getting validated by paying women to be with you, though. If you can pull women, in the real world, without paying an allowance in such a straightforward way, as SA, then is understandable(but after a certain age, wouldn’t that need go away, if you are secure man, anyway)…but getting validated by women from SA? Don’t think it would make me feel ‘validated’ if I was paying for someone…that is just me, though 😉

    To me, SA is a direct and no nonsense approach for both parties, in order to have a simple but mutual relationship, whatever terms they decide. The whole idea of being validated by paid poonanny(in the context in which this discussion started…(not speaking about true SD/SB relationships), seems juvenile…of course, then again, a man who is attractive to me, is a man who is not insecure and doesn’t need that sort of thing to begin with. Not all men are seeking validation on SA…some just want easy access to pretty ladies with no dramas, or have kinks or certain desires that are not easy to find.

  41. Josh says:

    @FatB’StardSA

    I have always liked and enjoyed when 20-somethings spread their legs for me.

    Does that mean I felt “validated” and did not know it OR I am denying such “validation”?

  42. flyR says:

    @Nicegirl – That’s why “ladies first” is a good rule for lots of things.

    Re time together – Agree that regular 1 hour meets have a very transactional character. I’m reminded of an old Jane Fonda film where she’s something between SB and pro, discretely checking her watch and finding that the hour was up and faking an orgasm to get her client off so she could leave.

    There’s a time and place for sex first and talk later, the SB who senses those moments is a wonderful asset

    There’s no doubt that there are a number of SB’s who have a strong age preference. However, my real life experience is that in an “active” market there are a SB’s across a wide age range who are comfortable with someone over 45. Obviously others are not – perhaps 50% .

    May have something to do with my preference for smart, nice and attractive vs obsession with Hollywood type beauty. The take me , show me off SB is probably not going to be attracted unless there is a substantial allowance.

    Personally the 10 minute romp is only appropriate as an appetizer to brush off the debris of the outside world (perhaps before dinner) if followed by a far longer session

  43. FatB'StardSA says:

    @DorkeyGuy

    Alice and Ralph slept with each other. Until I buy a pirate costume that is not going to happen with me and Pricey.

  44. FatB'StardSA says:

    @Josh

    “When a random woman spreads her legs a man he feels validated?

    The hotter the woman, the juiced up the validation?”

    The answer is YES. It is like trying to explain the color blue in words. It cannot be done, either you get it or you don’t. The fact that you are on the site trying to score tail that is beyond your reach without some “perks” tells me that you do get it but are in denial.

  45. FatB'StardSA says:

    @gtt_envy

    You mention an allowance of about $300 per meet and money for a fun date (which matches the cost of the allowance it seems). Is this “paying pennies” compared to an “older guy” where you are from?

    The SB’s on here who talk about only sleeping with someone they are attracted to are all older (> 30 years old). Not trying to start a flame war, it is just an observation :-).

  46. DorkyGuy says:

    FB and Spicey= Ralph and Alice Kramden

  47. Josh says:

    Re: Validation.

    I am trying to understand the phenomenon…

    When a random woman spreads her legs a man he feels validated?

    The hotter the woman, the juiced up the validation?

    Validated for what really?

  48. FatB'StardSA says:

    PriceySpicey comes back on the blog after many months and the best she can do is talk about the pirate again. It’s like the last Van Halen album that was a collection of reworked demos from the late 70’s, when you run out of new material it’s best to retire.

  49. Nicegirl says:

    @Rachael
    “And from a woman’s perspective… it’s not about how long the sex lasts, it’s the QUALITY. Sometimes you want a quickie, sometimes you want to take your time and thoroughly enjoy each others company.”

    This is very true. It isn’t necessarily the amount of time you have sex, but are both people satisfied in the end? If and SD is done in 10 minutes but his SB still has not climaxed and he is DONE…well that is just a selfish lover. I personally would be disappointed if my SD only wanted to spend an hour with me at a time. I would feel a bit cheap. When we are together – which is often, we are together for several hours as a time. Not necessarily having sex but enjoying each others company. He is not in this just for a quick F**k.

  50. DorkyGuy says:

    [img]http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/en_garde.png[/img]

  51. Nicegirl says:

    @Alexis… not jumping on the above, just an observation from your past posts. You seem to have an attack type of personality. You are waiting for someone to say something so that you can attack and be combative, that in and of itself is sabotage. I imagine if you approach your relationships in your life with the same way you never have any real peace or even let anyone in to actually get to know you. I do believe you get what you give, maybe not 100% in return but it will be a noticeable difference in your life. Learn to like women and they will like you in return. Learn to trust men and you just might find a trustworthy man.

    I believe that is why everyone believes you and Josh are the same poster… you both have the exact outlook on life. It is a shame really.

  52. Alexis says:

    Andddddd before someone jumps on the above…

    NO, I have NEVER posted from another account on here.

    *sighs*

  53. Alexis says:

    @Josh

    “Care to elaborate?”

    I don’t know what I could elaborate on this blog without opening myself up for “it was your fault you’ve been treated like shit” responses from the sadists (not you) on here. It was quite literal. Let’s just say that sabatoge thing you speak of so often, I’ve been on the receiving end of that way too often along with the rest of the crap. Just the typical garbage. You know the drill… AbusiveShit 101, 102, 103, and Capstone haha.

    Life goes on.

    “Are you an SB looking for an SD or are you an SM looking for whatever.”

    The account I currently post from is a SB account.

  54. Kms2014 says:

    And your posts make me think your knowledge of SBdom is that of $200 a pop for validation reasons, but hey, whatevs 😉

  55. gtt_envy says:

    @KMS, Your posts would definitely make me wonder how much of your courtesan knowledge is hypothetical. You seem to favor that viewpoint on many SD/SB talking points.

  56. Kms2014 says:

    well I understood your point, but am in a different market than you…haven’t been with a man over 50, either, in regards to sex….but, am an older SB, so would not penalize a 51 year old as long as he looked nice! Haha! A 51-55 year old, though, if not overweight and having hair(and being in shape), would be okay……If you go to a high end escort, then they charge the same no matter what age…just saying for hypothetical example…

  57. gtt_envy says:

    @KMS, I agree generosity and wealth are not linked, but still not my point. Allowance goes up with age because women demand it not because the guy is thrilled about giving it!

    The amount of profiles that say “NO, one over 45!”, “Don’t be my dad’s age please!!”, “I want a sugar daddy not a grand daddy!”

    For many women for them to sleep with someone over 50 would require a pretty penny that was my point.

  58. SugarySpicey says:

    Sorry! I’ve been having unsatisfying, but not angering, email exchanges with the Pirate and it’s made me weird. Hopefully I’ll go back to my regularly scheduled programming soon.

  59. Kms2014 says:

    I meant, no* guarantee…

  60. DorkyGuy says:

    Kinky!

  61. Kms2014 says:

    “gtt_envy says:
    September 23, 2014 at 11:33 pm
    @KMS, while I agree it is income level that’s not my point. My point was a “SB/woman/girl” really wants to sleep with you for REAL when allowance is removed from the picture.

    Income aside usually allowance goes up with age because it needs too bell curve I’m afraid.”

    Hmm, I disagree with this..only because age has had nothing to do with the generosity with my past relationships…it was the opposite, to be honest. However, can see why that is common belief, since most people accumulate more wealth as they age. It isn’t always the case as far as generosity, though…just like there is more guarantee that the man whose net worth is over 50 million will be more generous to you, than a man whose net worth is 5 million. It just depends on the person many times….but, makes one feel safer to have that higher income and net worth, as far as what to expect, to be honest.

  62. SugarySpicey says:

    Dork-Vadar – you don’t remove the corset dear, that’s a leave-on prop along with the ceiling pumps. You pull the stays so tight she can barely breath then keep her just on the brink and panting.

  63. SugarySpicey says:

    Fly,R – you should know better, Pricey Spicey doesn’t hump in attics, I have a weakness for 700 thread count Egyptian cotton … and being bent over just the right sized ottoman. 😉

  64. DorkyGuy says:

    10 minutes to remove her robe? I guess, but what if she is wearing a laced corset with all of the attachments? Do you have another guy there and take it in shifts?

  65. gtt_envy says:

    @KMS, while I agree it is income level that’s not my point. My point was a “SB/woman/girl” really wants to sleep with you for REAL when allowance is removed from the picture.

    Income aside usually allowance goes up with age because it needs too bell curve I’m afraid.

    @Analog Kid, I hear you mean 100%. I marvel at guys who are insecure with the use of vibrators and toys…..it’s all about making it more fun. The facts are good vibrators feel very good for most woman.

    My point was the same for you…………you may think you are the MAN in bed, but until you aren’t paying a allowance YOU AREN’T!! The other GUY IS!!

  66. SugarySpicey says:

    Men who rush to come are missing out, as are partners who take without giving, and anyone who has sex with limits (aka won’t perform oral sex because they choose partners they believe will give them STDs).

    Humans are not Bonobos needing to deposit their seed in any open orifice, and men who are unconcerned with their partner’s sexual satisfaction typically display deficiencies in other areas of their life as well.

    If a man is willing to “use” a woman, regularly, for his selfish unilateral satisfaction’ I’d bet odds he’s a very unhappy man,completely lacking in his ability to bring a woman sexual satisfaction.

    As we all know, bringing a woman to orgasm is the ultimate trick of listening, responding, adjusting, and Gotcha! and it leaves the whole room feeling victorious.

    Not that I would know, now that I’m vanilla and all. 😉

  67. Kms2014 says:

    Oh, I see….so, analog has a problem with RSD not performing oral sex on his SBs…well,we know you are not Josh now, lol 😉

  68. flyR says:

    correction 2-3 evenings

  69. flyR says:

    The sensual interlude is whatever is right between the participants. My preference is gourmet feast in most cases.

    I’m very sensitive to the SB’s who rush to completion and then rush home, AKA blow and go.

    Typical has been a 2-4 hour evening plus an overnight about once a month

  70. Analog Kid says:

    @ gtt: “it’s real easy to belittle another to make oneself feel better. All of us are in the same boat if we are paying a younger woman for companionship regardless of how you spin it you/we are still paying.

    I might be paying pennies compared to some 80yr old guy, but am still paying.”

    Of course you are paying …. I am paying …. we are all paying. Not the point I was getting at. I’m here for the passion and to ply my trade which happens to be sexual fulfillment for the woman as well as myself. I am flabbergasted beyond belief that a man would actually pay a woman to be their companion and then have the wherewithal of a 12 year old in bed. Maybe it has nothing to do with this site at all. Perhaps it’s simply astounding to me that there are men in the world who have no idea how to pleasure a woman. 10 minutes ? Wow ……. it takes me longer than that to even remove their clothing …… which usually amounts to a maybe a robe.

  71. flyR says:

    @ Dorky – Nooo your comments are a welcome intermission. “The Dorkster ” is a term of admiration……… OK I am a little jealous if you and S&S are posting from the attic.

  72. Kms2014 says:

    “gtt_envy says:
    September 23, 2014 at 8:08 pm
    @analog kid, it’s real easy to belittle another to make oneself feel better. All of us are in the same boat if we are paying a younger woman for companionship regardless of how you spin it you/we are still paying.

    I might be paying pennies compared to some 80yr old guy, but am still paying.”

    I don’t think it really has to do with age, in regards to allowance amounts or relative to what you pay. Have had SDs younger than me, by a few years(one by more than that) who were more generous than one almost twice their age. It just depends on the benefactor’s income, net worth(sometimes, although that is not always an indicator of generosity)marital status(single men are usually able to transfer more
    without worrying about it), and what they are willing to gift…RSD is not in his 80’s…think he is in his early 40’s and for some reason Analog Kid has a problem with him, since he appears to care about his SBs and wants to be generous. That is RSD’s business what he wants to do and how much, with HIS gifting practices/amounts, in regards to his SBs.

  73. SugarySpicey says:

    Nasiea – No, No, No – you sound like a ghetto hooker desperate for a bump. You are NOT looking for ANY SD, you are looking for THE SD. And, THE SD ain’t going to “hit you up anytime” because THE SD is looking for an SB who appreciates HIM, and only HIM, for the delightful beast that he is … or, if you want the sugar bowl not to eat you alive and leave lines on your face, that’s at least what you need to pretend!

  74. Analog Kid says:

    @ RSD: “I’m sure she will love you to death as you are what’s known as the “whale”……can’t wait to shower them with money and are shitty/ uninteresting in bed. In fact I’d bet that more than 1/2 the time you see each other you don’t even end up in bed and when you do ….. it’s probably over in 10 minutes. The perfect SD …………”

    Yeah I shower SBs with money–is that wrong? Typically, I have sex with SBs every time I meet them, although one SB had major depression for a while and sex became more spotty until she got better; I continued to support her financially while I slept with another SB. Sex with SBs can go from a few minutes for those who prefer quickies to an hour and a half for the more sensual ones. Since I now usually spend 1-1.5 hours with an SB, I’d rather have the sex not take up the entire meet. Anyways, 10 minutes is not as horrid as you make it sound; average from what I’ve read is 4 minutes.

    I suspect all the SDs here who think they’re porn stars in bed have SBs who think otherwise. These 80 year old SDs are just gullible; when a 20 year old tells them they just had the best sex of their lives, they believe it!

    Dude .. you really need to quit while you are behind.

  75. SugarySpicey says:

    Yay! All the old bloggies back! If we keep up the volume perhaps we can drown out the noise.

    Sweetie my dear, I have a feeling my vanilla is another man’s Rocky Road ;).

    GTT – I guess it’s all about selection set, huh? My vagina is attracted to status, swagger, and success – abs and dimples, meh …. Oh, and I also really, really, really like to hump (and ladies, big serious, men in their sub forties can’t throw a decent hump to save their 22% no-down-payment-Jetta.

  76. sweetie says:

    Hello, Beach Girl! Good to see you. How have you been?

  77. DorkyGuy says:

    Hey Sweetie and Beachy!

    Beach, love the avatar, Gianmarco? Yours?? Put those in a glass case.. don’t wear them for heavens sake!

  78. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars!

    Sweetie, Dorky and Sugary!!! Hi 😀 glad to see you are all well 😀

  79. sweetie says:

    Sugary!!! Good to see you. Dorky, as well.

    I can’t believe you said this “and it turns out vanilla can be pretty tasty.” I remember that topic on the blog. Welcome to the vanilla side!

  80. gtt_envy says:

    @SS, you are not the norm you should know that by now……or better weren’t the norm.

    Most SB’s without a allowance aren’t doing fiddly with someone their dad’s age lol.

  81. Nasiea says:

    hey guys Need a nice S.D thats good to me you can hit me up anytime

  82. DorkyGuy says:

    Wow, bells and whistles? In a sex pond? That explains the rust! Now I just have to figure out how the bells and whistles were used.

    Congrats on IRL bliss. Be sure to avail yourself of the frequent travel to punch your Mile High Club ticket!

  83. SugarySpicey says:

    GTT – I only ever had sex when I actually wanted sex, and with a partner I actually wanted to have sex with. Genero$ity just swung the pendulum in his favor over less generous options I met on this site.

    As the brilliant philosopher Fabio once said, “Give a woman good sex, and she’ll do anything for you.” If a woman doesn’t want to go back to the sex pond with you, the sexy wasn’t good. 😉

  84. SugarySpicey says:

    I don’t know Dorkydoodledandy, I may have lost my swag, fortunately I haven’t needed it much these days. I’ve been having “real” sex with someone who doesn’t need the bells and whistles, and it turns out vanilla can be pretty tasty.

  85. DorkyGuy says:

    It’s marketing… You aren’t rusty. You are well oxidized.

  86. gtt_envy says:

    @analog kid, it’s real easy to belittle another to make oneself feel better. All of us are in the same boat if we are paying a younger woman for companionship regardless of how you spin it you/we are still paying.

    I might be paying pennies compared to some 80yr old guy, but am still paying.

    When you find a SB her turns into a girl/woman who just wants to bang you for the sake of banging you then you can differentiate yourself from the rest of us.

    I’ve come close to that, but still give small amounts to the 2-3 girls I see from time to time. Nowhere near a typical allowance though and we only hang out once every 3-5 weeks. 1 of those three is close to being just a F#ck buddy she’s 23 we are actually hanging on Friday because she is “Horny and it’s been too long”. No $$$ talk at all, so if I’m all excited on Saturday that will be why lol.

    On another note date this weekend Sunday………. 😉 we will see how it goes she seems to be a keeper “virtually” lol.

  87. SugarySpicey says:

    Oooooh Dorky, it’s been a while, I’m not playing in the pool these days either, so I may be rusty, are you offering? 😉

  88. Rachel SB says:

    @Desert Baby just post your profile number like Josh said. However, you will get decent criticism from both SD’s and SB’s. Those of us who have done this with success want others to do well. There are various tastes out there, so there are potential arrangements that are missed if your profile is not set up well. You need decent structure, punctuation, and true personality. You need to be YOU. This is what I call your elevator pitch. Translation: If you were to meet a guy you REALLY liked in an elevator, what would you tell him about you? Knowing that you might NEVER see him again. You need to have a hook. Leave him wanting more, but also getting a clear glimpse as to who you are.

    When I started I asked for help from the blog, and I got help, along with my first successful arrangement that lasted for 8 months till my SD moved (we are still friends). All due to the profile changes I made based upon the guidance I received here.

    If you want my help without putting your profile out on the blog, our lovely moderator has my email address and I give my permission to share it with you so I can help you!

  89. DorkyGuy says:

    @sugary – could be the reason the Dorkster is so mild mannered these days.

    @FlyrR~ My apologies… this is more your home than mine. If you feel I am being unduly disruptive, I introduce some restraints. I bet Spicey has some extra that I can borrow.

  90. Rachel SB says:

    Good to see everyone tonight. Must admit, I’m a bit shocked at how much the blog has changed. I second SugarySpicey’s sentiment. Although everyone has a right to their opinion, and in reading some of the comments it appears to be mostly friendly banter (but not all friendly).

    NC Gent – good to see you! RSD – Good to see you as well!

    And from a woman’s perspective… it’s not about how long the sex lasts, it’s the QUALITY. Sometimes you want a quickie, sometimes you want to take your time and thoroughly enjoy each others company. And that doesn’t mean with various people. Let me be clear about that! It means, if I’m in a frisky mood I would figure out what kind of mood my SD was in. If he’s frisky too… fast and furious it is! Doesn’t mean it lacks passion or sensuality. Then there are times we take it slow, a no stone un-turned moment.

    I say if it works, the SD AND SB are happy… leave it be. Aren’t we all here to fulfill something that’s missing? So what if it’s not YOUR idea of perfect? It just might be someone else’s idea of an amazing time, and it doesn’t mean it’s less worth it. :)

  91. Josh says:

    @RSD, interesting observations indeed.

  92. RSD says:

    Just realized that the education categories in SA profiles are missing “some high school.” There are tons of high school dropouts out there, and we should be able to sort out the ones who at least graduated high school from the ones who need money to take their GED.

    I think this is a reflection of our desire to pigeonhole everyone into societal stereotypes. It’s like how on facebook you can’t have it to where you’re married to more than one person (millions worldwide are), or in a relationship with three people (again, fairly common), or married to one person and in a relationship with another. You would think that these websites would take into account a wider range of reality.

  93. flyrR says:

    @sugary – could be the reason the Dorkster is so mild mannered these days.

  94. RSD says:

    @Analog Kid: “I’m sure she will love you to death as you are what’s known as the “whale”……can’t wait to shower them with money and are shitty/ uninteresting in bed. In fact I’d bet that more than 1/2 the time you see each other you don’t even end up in bed and when you do ….. it’s probably over in 10 minutes. The perfect SD …………”

    Yeah I shower SBs with money–is that wrong? Typically, I have sex with SBs every time I meet them, although one SB had major depression for a while and sex became more spotty until she got better; I continued to support her financially while I slept with another SB. Sex with SBs can go from a few minutes for those who prefer quickies to an hour and a half for the more sensual ones. Since I now usually spend 1-1.5 hours with an SB, I’d rather have the sex not take up the entire meet. Anyways, 10 minutes is not as horrid as you make it sound; average from what I’ve read is 4 minutes.

    I suspect all the SDs here who think they’re porn stars in bed have SBs who think otherwise. These 80 year old SDs are just gullible; when a 20 year old tells them they just had the best sex of their lives, they believe it!

  95. Nicegirl says:

    Good one Alexis! 😉

  96. Josh says:

    And just maybe…

    SugarySpicey = DorkyGuy = flyR

    Hmmmm… 😉

  97. SugarySpicey says:

    Flyr – perhaps Dorky and I have been having a secret tryst and finally came up for ointment and oxygen. 😉 he does seem suspiciously familiar with my pleasure preferences.

  98. flyrR says:

    @ Dorkster

    Great to have you stopping by……… You and Spicey emerged from the fog at about the same time, random chance?

  99. SugarySpicey says:

    Hey ladies and gents, thanks for the kind welcome.

    Dorky-doo-dah I don’t travel with the Hitachi, after a mishap in Manchester where my luggage didn’t show up I carry on only, no room for power tools. Fortunately I usually stay at W hotels where they have the hand held shower nozzles, so I take matters in hand, so to speak.

  100. Nicegirl says:

    Just for the record many women find smart dorky guys hot! Dr. Spencer Reid from Criminal Minds… yummy

  101. Josh says:

    @SouthernSB,

    I just looked up characteristics of sociopaths. Sorry to disappointment you but the answer is no.

    Just wait for a few minutes though.

    The DorkyGuy (what a fucked up id) will slap something together (insecurity, honesty, obnoxious, etc.) to declare otherwise. 😉

  102. SouthernSB says:

    @Josh-I’m beginning to think you are a sociopath. A really funny sociopath, but a sociopath all the same.

  103. DorkyGuy says:

    Nooooo… I like being boring!

    Being boring works for me for exactly the same reason that being abrasive works for you. There is a decent chance that the girl may just get so tired of you that she’ll stick a boob in your mouth just to shut you up.

    My favorite tactic is to pull out a Bible and show her how all of the laws in Leviticus were really prophetic symbols of the messiah. Then I read the Begats. If she listens intently through the whole thing, there is a good chance I will propose eventually. Hasn’t happened yet though.

    I definitely suggest you keep going with the whole preemptive sabotage thing. It’s guaranteed to inspire them to move past the conversation phase!

  104. Josh says:

    Right now you’re as boring as the yawner girl. Maybe you’ll start writing interesting stuff like yougottaX did after a little while.

  105. Josh says:

    @DorkyGuy,

    Write away. 😉

  106. Nicegirl says:

    @DorkGuy… I am not sure he meant that. All women really find him irresistibly attractive. He is the one that doesn’t like many people. From what I have been told of course!

  107. DorkyGuy says:

    @Josh~

    “(if they really like you)”

    That would be at most 7 out of 7 billion people. 😉

    Wow, that is a brutally honest revelation. I must give you props for that moment of self reflection. Is that why you are in the sugar world? Can’t find the 4 girls on the planet who are statistically able to like you?

    @kms~ Yep, I get the battle of wits thing. It is fun, as long as everyone is in on the joke, and respects boundaries. I love celebrity roasts, and The Burn with Jeffrey Ross is great fun.

  108. Josh says:

    Rather…British comedy is joke, which is no laughing matter.

    Were it not for Charles Rolland Douglass (Mexico-born American inventor of fake laughter), British recorded comedy would have remained a tragedy. 😉

  109. Josh says:

    British comedy is a joke. 😉

  110. Kms2014 says:

    Well, they just get a little more insulting(the men, really) with each other if they are mates. But, is pretty funny to listen to. It is done in a friendship banter way…

  111. Josh says:

    Kms2014,

    “(if they really like you)”

    That would be at most 7 out of 7 billion people. 😉

  112. Kms2014 says:

    I meant, Sasha went to Oxford Uni, and met someone over there who went there with him and had a few classes.no coffee yet!

  113. Kms2014 says:

    Yes, I thought they were being mean to mean, but they try and have a match of wits with each other all the time…one teacher I worked with would constantly insult the students, but as messed up as it was, some deserved it and was quite comical. That doesn’t work well in US schools because the parents will freak out and have a teacher fired if they do that, hehe.

    Dated a Kazakh once…and he lived with a other Kazakh guy. If you want to know who really hates Borat, then speak to someone from there, obviously…they will not let Borat go! Hehe…anyway, his roommate disliked Americans like many countries do, and went on a long tangent about how Sasha said on an interview somewhere that many of his characters were marketed to Americans and our low level humour and that Brits were too clever for this, but the racist ignorant Americans loved Borat and didn’t even know that kazahstan existed, much less they portrayed it as more of an Eastern European country. I never saw or heard him say anything like that, but probably him trying to calm the Kazakhs apdown and throw US under the bus, hehe. He went to Harvard and has a really hot wife….and Ali G was pretty funny…a Jewish/Yehudi guy dressed up as an Arab? Lol

  114. DorkyGuy says:

    @kms~ never been to England, but I love the English humor that has found popularity in the US. Monty Python, Benny Hill, Ricky Gervais, etc. Even Rowan Atkinson. All of them love riffing on their characters’ flaws. Then there is Sacha Baron Cohen, who is in a class by himself. Ali G was simply brilliant.

  115. Kms2014 says:

    “As for self-deprecating humor, I find there are three kinds of people. People who do it too much are riddled with insecurity. People who do it a little are generally self-aware and confident. People who are incapable of it themselves and ridicule others for it either lack self awareness or are riddled with insecurity. It is a useful guide for reading people.”

    Hello Dorky, ever been to England? Haha, most of their humour is very self deprecating or insulting of others(if they really like you)…is pretty funny, though, in a clever way (:

    Welcome back, SS (((: How have you been, lady?

  116. Josh says:

    @NC Gent

    Not that there’s anything wrong with that. 😉

  117. NC Gent says:

    Heya DG – long time no see — hope all is well. Hi Spicey — always good to see you again. I am guessing Josh is a paying member of the site otherwise they would have done something to resolve his domination of the blog long ago.

  118. DorkyGuy says:

    @Spicey~

    And when writing about things as vapid as what’s in my travel makeup kit I don’t particularly need to have that forever associated with my personal brand

    lol! To read your site, people mascara ’bout your content. That is the foundation of a good blog. Don’t brush them off by being a concealer of your best travel accessories. Make them blush. Write about your hitachi next time!

  119. DorkyGuy says:

    @NiceGirl~ TY! I agree… It seems unlikely that someone who posts frequently could be an active SD. When are they earning their income?

    I am not an active SD either, so my comments shouldn’t be given the same weight as others’. Much better for people to take advice from SD Guru, FatBastard, gentle(man), Spicey, GTT, or Flyr, who are actually out there doing it.

    Speaking of, it doesn’t look like Guru has posted since Kristen appeared. I hope Guru is still around. It would be a real loss to the site if he stepped away.

    Glad to see FB is still stirring up trouble! FatBastard can be loveably obnoxious, usually in a humorous, tongue-in-cheek way that is endearing. He is a master of effective self-deprecating humor.

  120. gentle(man)soul says:

    @Josh

    “Based on the data provided so far, you stroked his big head and forgot about the little twin brother. So her gave you the shake hand instead of trying to drive is tongue in you mouth, and trying to feel your boobs against his chest.”

    Good advice for any relationship with a male ladies,whether you are an SB or a power broker. As Spicey just implied “sex sells”

  121. Nicegirl says:

    @Doryguy – nice name btw ;o)

    “Good lord man, you are not the universal model for all SDs everywhere. Neither am I.”

    Based on the comments I have read and the amount of free time, I am pretty sure he is not an SD at all – let alone the universal model for all SD’s.

  122. SugarySpicey says:

    Dorkalicious –

    The new job is amazing, just hit Platinum Medallion status so it’s nice that I now get upgraded at least half the time. It’s also turned out to be more fun than I expected. So how can I wish Pirate away, that experience led me to what I still believe was winning the career lottery (for me, personally, and working an insane amount of hours, others results may vary)

    The old blog is gone forever. When I deleted it I even deleted each article individually, so that I can’t be tempted to revive it. I write a travel and fashion/girly shit blog now, not getting the 1,000+ hits a day that sex and drama brings, but it’s respectable writing I can tell friends and family about (though I don’t). I prefer my writing to be uninfluenced by worry about what people will think of me. And when writing about things as vapid as what’s in my travel makeup kit I don’t particularly need to have that forever associated with my personal brand.

    See, that’s a little self-deprecating humor that shows self-awareness without making others uncomfortable. Not everyone has the confidence needed to accept their imperfections. It’s not worth trying to teach them, they’ll learn it when they’re ready, or lead lonely, bitter, small, miserable lives. ~ shrug.

  123. Josh says:

    @DorkGuy,

    Welcome back to posting frequently. 😉

  124. DorkyGuy says:

    @Josh-

    I don’t see how you could have prevented yourself from posting self-depricating comments detrimental to SDs

    Wow, you are more defensive than Al Sharpton at an NRA rally.

    My comment was not self-deprecating, nor deprecating toward SDs. I simply acknowledged that not all SDs are the same. Some like yourself have terrific social skills. Others do not. I propose that there is a cross-section of SDs who are successful because they neglected social pursuits while building their business. Isn’t it plausible that Afri stumbled into one of those?

    Good lord man, you are not the universal model for all SDs everywhere. Neither am I.

    As for self-deprecating humor, I find there are three kinds of people. People who do it too much are riddled with insecurity. People who do it a little are generally self-aware and confident. People who are incapable of it themselves and ridicule others for it either lack self awareness or are riddled with insecurity. It is a useful guide for reading people.

  125. DorkyGuy says:

    @Elaine -Hi! Good to see ya!

    @Spicey- grandkids is great! I have two now, and one more on the way! How is the new job? Did you revive your blog, or has it remained shuttered?

  126. DorkyGuy says:

    @Josh- Contrary to your belief, I don’t wish you ill, nausea, or even a zit. I am simply stating the way you present yourself, which is insufferably obnoxious.

    Our differences will not be primarily with ideology… We will probably agree on a number of points. However, there is no law that says that being right entitles one to be an asshole.

    Declaring that you don’t care what people think just so that you can trample them with rudeness is not a virtue. Life is not an elementary school playground.

    The measure of a man is not how big his ego is. It certainly isn’t who hates women the most, nor how many of those women you can get into bed.

  127. Elaine says:

    Hi Sugary and Dorky, nice to see you back :-)

    Hope you will stay a little longer!

  128. Josh says:

    @DorkyGuy

    “@Josh- Once upon a time I posted as frequently as you do. I hope to God that I wasn’t as obnoxious. You seem to be an expert in preemptive sabotage in others, but seem utterly ignorant of how you sabotage yourself.”

    In the past I have tried responding neutrally to people who posted idiotic comments as above, only to see them get braver in their subsequent posts. Therefore, it is safer to assume that you mean ill against me, and I will respond accordingly.

    Even though you could have chosen a million other ids, with your fucked up choice of id, I don’t see how you could have prevented yourself from posting self-depricating comments detrimental to SDs.

    So post whatever you feel like posting. I don’t give a shit. 😉

  129. Analog Kid says:

    @ RSD “Well, after a couple of horrid first/second meets, looks like I have found a real winner SB. College grad from a solid school, writes in impeccable English, speaks articulately, has a full-time and well-paying job, and wants money to save to pursue future education. And yes, she’s drop-dead gorgeous. She seems equally interested, so hopefully this will work longer term. But I’m realistic; will see…”

    I’m sure she will love you to death as you are what’s known as the “whale”……can’t wait to shower them with money and are shitty/ uninteresting in bed. In fact I’d bet that more than 1/2 the time you see each other you don’t even end up in bed and when you do ….. it’s probably over in 10 minutes. The perfect SD …………

  130. SugarySpicey says:

    Hey Dorky-Boo-Boo!

    Thanks for the sympathy. I really don’t wish him ill, I wish myself well. :). And, in the year it’s taken to recover from all the shit that went down on my “Bali Birthday” I’ve come to live by the mantra that “we create everything that’s wrong with our lives” – so it’s funny you’d mention some people’s propensity to self-sabotage.
    Amazing what that tiny change in perspective has done. Hope the grand baby is well. :)

  131. DorkyGuy says:

    @Afri- neither social skills nor confidence are prerequisites for being a SD. Perhaps that is why he is not seeking conventional relationships? Who knows the issues he is dealing with? Spicey may have helpful advice.

    @Spicey- very sorry to hear about Pirate. Hopefully he one day succumbs to his antipharmaceutical bug collection.

    @Flyr- good to see ya!

    @Josh- Once upon a time I posted as frequently as you do. I hope to God that I wasn’t as obnoxious. You seem to be an expert in preemptive sabotage in others, but seem utterly ignorant of how you sabotage yourself.

    Looks like the blog has taken an interesting turn, with SA more actively curating comments. That seems to be a positive.

  132. Josh says:

    @Afri

    Don’t be “confused” sweetheart, get over it.

    Based on the data provided so far, you stroked his big head and forgot about the little twin brother. So her gave you the shake hand instead of trying to drive is tongue in you mouth, and trying to feel your boobs against his chest.

    Move on to the next pot and make sure that you work on both of his heads.

    Josh Guru

  133. Josh says:

    By the way, fuck Pirate already. This is the new crowd. Come up with some new and interesting shit. I know you can do it. 😉

  134. Afri says:

    @ josh. Lol

    The date went well, we related on many different things and genuinely seemed attracted to me. We talked for 3 hours until the bar closed. Then when we were parting he said “ok are we friends?” And shook my hand. I don’t know if it’s because he is all business and weird about this things initially. He did not contact me the next day at all to say it was nice meeting me or anything. I’m confused

  135. Josh says:

    Hello SugarySpicey,

    Got tired of posting as flyR, the 80-something, male, young fart? 😉

  136. SugarySpicey says:

    Wishing the old sugars were still on this site. The Pirate landed back in town this week and it’s totally f*cked with my head, as was his goal I imagine. I’d never have known he was here if he hadn’t emailed.

  137. Josh says:

    So ask for her great granddaughters’ SA ids?

  138. Josh says:

    @Afri

    Too little information to comment on what might have happened.

    But if the purpose of the post was just to vent, then vent away sister! 😉

  139. Afri says:

    Met a POT for the first time date goes well he shakes my hand at the end of the date and says so are we friends? wtf is that

  140. Kms2014 says:

    90 years old…heavy smoker and drinker? Aha! So, it is genetics, then! I’m going back to my unhealthy lifestyle!

    And her six kids’ grand kids are probably older than you, Josh, so think you should go for it 😉

  141. Josh says:

    There are 82 SBs with 6+ children.

    For example:

    90 year-old from San Jose, California
    Sweet, Shy, Cheerleader! I live to please :)

    Height 4′ 6″
    Body Type Full / Overweight
    Ethnicity Asian
    Hair Color Light Brown
    Eye Color Green
    Interested In Men
    Education PhD / Post Doctoral
    Occupation Student
    Relationship Single
    Children 6+
    Smoking Heavy Smoker
    Drinking Heavy Drinker
    Expectation Practical

    Your time with me will be worth while. I am very sincere and passionate.

  142. Josh says:

    Whatever you say…Yawn. :)

  143. Nicegirl says:

    Finally, I have made you cave with a glimmer of reason… Good night Josh xxoo

    You are so insecure Josh, It is funny to get you going… Yawn 😉

  144. Josh says:

    Whatever you say…Yawn. :)

  145. Nicegirl says:

    I think I should sign my posts with the part you conveniently left off. The truth hurts sometimes, here goes…

    You are so insecure Josh, It is funny to get you going… Yawn 😉

  146. Josh says:

    “It is funny to get you going… Yawn”

    That’s how you should sign your posts. 😉

  147. Nicegirl says:

    RSD – I hope it works out. She sounds like an amazing catch

  148. Nicegirl says:

    I am not so arrogant to assume I have claim on anything associated with this blog… but I am taking part in the conversation… to your horror.

    You are so insecure Josh. It is funny to get you going… Yawn

  149. Kms2014 says:

    “Josh says:
    September 22, 2014 at 4:45 pm
    @Kms2014

    “No…Josh, don’t think that… nicegirl and ygbkm are two separate bloggers for sure (:”

    That’s just one of your numerous opinions, isn’t it? ”

    Ironic…you would say that about those with opinions 😉 Oh wait, everything you say is fact, ehehe!

  150. RSD says:

    Well, after a couple of horrid first/second meets, looks like I have found a real winner SB. College grad from a solid school, writes in impeccable English, speaks articulately, has a full-time and well-paying job, and wants money to save to pursue future education. And yes, she’s drop-dead gorgeous. She seems equally interested, so hopefully this will work longer term. But I’m realistic; will see…

  151. Josh says:

    Re: Dinner table conversation.

    Since I primarily meet SBs in restaurants for dinner, I have noticed certain patterns of dinner table conversations.

    Among white families, and most AA families, there are two overwhelming threads:

    Single family dinner: The man is constantly admonished by the woman, and the man maintains his “yes dear” role. Womenspeak: “Aww he loves her so much!”

    Multi-family dinner: Women are admonishing their respective men, with occasional collective admonishing of the group’s “bad boy.” Womenspeak: “Aww they love their wives so much.”

  152. Josh says:

    flyR is a female, who writing as an 80-something male young fart. So she writes using a female intelligence that other females understand.

  153. Josh says:

    “our dinner btw.”

    Hmmm, I love it when newcomers feel so comfortable that they claim the blog. LOL! err yawn…sorry.

  154. Nicegirl says:

    Josh… I suppose you PHD has clouded your ability to read and comprehend what you just read. FlyR did not say what you comprehended it as… You need to be a certain level of intelligence to understand his analogy of this blog vs a dinner table… you are the conversation hog at our dinner btw.

  155. Josh says:

    Yawn…sorry folks. The more she types the more I yawn. 😉

  156. Josh says:

    @Grandpa flyR

    “In a way the blog is like the conversation around a dinner table of friends.”

    This blog has never been “coversation around a dinner table of friends.”

    I guess your experience with dinner conversations is as sketchy as your “experience” with women.

    Dinner conversations almost always consist of some people talking too much and some people focusing more on food/drinks.

  157. Nicegirl says:

    Josh… exactly… I may make you yawn but I don’t hide behind someone I find more interesting than I really am.

  158. Nicegirl says:

    What are you even saying??? Do you understand yourself half the time? or just type crap to fill the time.

  159. Josh says:

    I wish I was as rich and as slick as my avatar. 😉

  160. Josh says:

    “I always find it interesting when people get so upset because people have the nerve to speak an opinion that may not be the same as theirs.”

    Hmmm, really…does that a lsa apply to someone who does not join the female partyline here?

  161. Nicegirl says:

    Josh, my avatar is me, how about yours?

  162. Nicegirl says:

    Josh… PhD in empirical BS more like it. from yours truly, Yawner ;o)

    @Gentle, thank you xx

  163. flyR says:

    @X “As far as those who complain about “excessive” posting by one blogger, if you have time, interest and ability then you post as well. Who is stopping you? ”

    In a way the blog is like the conversation around a dinner table of friends. When someone joins who insists on monopolizing every topic the reason for being there diminishes. Being restrained in a social conversation is a sign of consideration for others.

    My experience (limited to dealings with women) is that those who are selfish in public are seldom generous in bed. However, comments from female friends seem to confirm that the same is true.

  164. Josh says:

    Gentle is a very practical SD. He likes your avatar, yawner girl. 😉

  165. Josh says:

    Gentle is a very practical SD. He likes your avatar, yawner girl. 😉

  166. Josh says:

    Yawn…sorry.

  167. Josh says:

    @Kms2014

    “No…Josh, don’t think that… nicegirl and ygbkm are two separate bloggers for sure (:”

    That’s just one of your numerous opinions, isn’t it? 😉

  168. gentle(man)soul says:

    @Nicegirl

    I like you Sweetheart , yawner or not ( :

  169. flyR says:

    Desert SB

    You can post your profile number here and ask for comments The comments will range from friend/helpful to brutal/irrelevant

  170. [public broadcast]

    Next on Seeking Arrangement: Lucid Dreams from the Vodka Distillery, starrrrring Shirrrrrrrrley Templllllle!!!”

  171. Josh says:

    @Kms2014

    “You find yourself very interesting, don’t you? Hehe.

    No that there’s anything wrong with that… 😉

    “PhD in posting on blog the most, yes!”

    Sweetheart, I have a PhD in empirical analysis.

    As far as those who complain about “excessive” posting by one blogger, if you have time, interest and ability then you post as well. Who is stopping you?

    If you don’t have time, interest or ability tobpost here, then do whatever you have time, interest or ability in.

  172. Nicegirl says:

    I would much rather be a yawner but true to myself than what you appear to be Josh. I make you yawn and you fascinate me… and not in a good way I might add.

    @Kms… you are correct, he doesn’t really teach – he loves to tell others what they should think. I always find it interesting when people get so upset because people have the nerve to speak an opinion that may not be the same as theirs.

  173. Kms2014 says:

    No…Josh, don’t think that… nicegirl and ygbkm are two separate bloggers for sure (:

  174. Josh says:

    yougottabewhatevertoday and Nicegirl are the same person. The former is the interesting side and the latter is the yawner.

    Yawn…sorry.

  175. Josh says:

    And flyR, who post like a 80-something male, is the reminiscence of the psychopath.

  176. Kms2014 says:

    The story I find interesting is a former lesbian/bisexual SB(is she/he is a SD or Sm, by the way?), who really hates oral sex performed on her, but wants to find a 40 year old virgin SD, who will gift only $1,000 a month, but should not be expected to wear a condom…? A comical character, nonetheless 😉

  177. Josh says:

    One thing is for sure, “independent woman” is an oxymoronic term for most women.

  178. Kms2014 says:

    Well, wouldn’t really say, teach…more like repeating certain things a lot 😉

  179. Nicegirl says:

    and those that like to tell stories. I have read many interesting stories on this blog

  180. Nicegirl says:

    KMS… there are those that like to do and those that like to teach. ;o)

  181. Kms2014 says:

    You find yourself very interesting, don’t you? Hehe. PhD in posting on blog the most, yes!

  182. Josh says:

    @Alexis

    “My two key elements would be that I’m sick of being treated like shit by women.”

    Care to elaborate?

    “I would like to find someone who treats me better and is more on my level class-wise.”

    Are you an SB looking for an SD or are you an SM looking for whatever.

  183. Josh says:

    @Alexis

    I have a PhD in getting to the bottom of things. 😉

  184. Alexis says:

    @Josh
    That’s some list you have there. It sorta made me giggle. I don’t really see how my posts are “all over the map” but everyone is entitled to their viewpoint. I would guess I must have “a totally unique view on relationships” as you stated. My two key elements would be that I’m sick of being treated like shit by women and that I would like to find someone who treats me better and is more on my level class-wise. Every woman I meet is either broke, broker, or brokest. They have no career-goals or (willing) ability to improve their lives.

    As for number 2 there, you’re spot on. I express myself because some of the female so-called logic is way off on a reality score, so I correct it.

    Number 3, no Josh… just no. I’m glad you finally let it out though.

  185. Josh says:

    @Desert Baby

    Plesse post your profile number and get ready to hear:

    1. From active SDs what you can/should/must do to increase quality and quantity of arrangements on SA.

    2. From equally struggling SBs as to how you must stay your ground and do WHAT YOU WANT TO DO, and be patient…forever…until you are not active on SA anymore.

    😉

  186. Desert Baby says:

    Could I get some advice about my profile? I can’t seem to find a SD. I even recently upgraded.

  187. Josh says:

    @SouthernSB, it seems that you are reinventing your persona on the blog lately? 😉

  188. Nicegirl says:

    @ SB… “@Nicegirl-Oh I totally agree, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that I LOVE nothing better than straight up one on one porn star sex!!

    Hello! Ah Yeah!! lol

  189. SouthernSB says:

    @Nicegirl-Oh I totally agree, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that I LOVE nothing better than straight up one on one porn star sex!!

  190. Nicegirl says:

    SB… a man that knows what he is doing is nothing short of heavenly bliss…

  191. SouthernSB says:

    Oh no, no, no I love the penie much better than that and would much rather ride than have someone taste especially if it’s like going to the gyno’s office or like having a sandblaster raked across my delicate areas.

  192. Nicegirl says:

    lol – you don’t hide your immaturity any better than others hide their cluelessness.

    go to work Josh… or school… or whatever it is that you do with the 5 hours a day that you are not trolling this blog.

  193. Josh says:

    “Isn’t she?? hmmmm…”

    Yawn…sorry…

    It seems…yawn…sorry…that the yawn inducing blogger…yawn…sorry…believes the same. Yawwwwwwwn. Sorry.

  194. Nicegirl says:

    “I seems that Elaine, Kms2014 and yougottabelieveornotidontcare still believe that Alexis = Josh. ;)”

    Isn’t she?? hmmmm…

  195. Nicegirl says:

    @Elaine

    “Serious!? what woman would actually ever ASK for oral!?
    If this is not a spontaneous thing that comes naturally and voluntary during sex, well forget about it then…I would never ask.
    But do realize that for most women oral is the best -if not the only!- way to orgasm.
    You think your magic stick is doing the trick and making her cum?
    Yeah, sure, and Santa Claus is real!”

    AMEN!!!

  196. Josh says:

    I seems that Elaine, Kms2014 and yougottabelieveornotidontcare still believe that Alexis = Josh. 😉

  197. :)

    Oh the reasons why I luv you, babe.

  198. Josh says:

    @Alexis

    1. Either your posts are all over the map because you have a totally unique view on relationships, which will take a while and lot more posts for people, including yours truly, to understand where you may be coming from. It took me a while before people started to understand where I was coming from. Two key elements are “proactive sabotage” and “projects.” The former is not my formulation. The latter is. 😉

    2. You are a female and rightfully exercising your right to express yourself by constantly making statements that typically go against female “logic.”

    3. You are a male and having a good time by constantly making statements that typically go against female “logic.”

  199. Alexis says:

    Josh,
    Thank you very much for your apologies.

  200. Analog Kid says:

    Yet more conviction that P4P should be the ONLY MO in an arrangement.

  201. Josh says:

    Yes SDs like to be open minded about SBs’ boy projects.

    However, unless an SD is doing P4P, I seriously doubt that he can get decent return of his investment if the SB is simultaneously carrying on a boy project. The SD will just get crumbs of her time, energy and interest.

  202. Josh says:

    @Analog Kid

    “I talk too much sometimes.”

    I wonder if “sometimes” is an understatement? 😉

    Ask her if she has a boy project or if she is currently living a celibate life.

  203. Josh says:

    @Alexis

    Hmmm, if you are not into getting oral done on you, do you care to share what type of lesbian sexual activities you engaged in? If it is too personal, my apologies, please skip. Thanks

  204. “wth lol you’re all over the place with this. Make up your mind.”

  205. Alexis says:

    and don’t start dad, as I’m pretty sure you have an inverted penis, so behave.

  206. Alexis says:

    “Really? And you are a previous lesbian/bisexual…and, you do not fancy oral? Okay, Mr. man…identify yourself, as there is no way you are a woman…lol!”

    So you’re saying men don’t enjoy oral? wth lol you’re all over the place with this. Make up your mind.

    Some women do not like oral. I’m one of them. I have met a few others. Everyone’s body does not work the same.

  207. “Kms2014 says:
    September 21, 2014 at 1:51 pm
    “Alexis says:
    September 21, 2014 at 12:23 pm
    “Seriously, this is not Cosmo where somehow ever woman is pleased in the same generic way.”

    Thank you!
    I seriously, seriously do NOT like receiving oral as some other women also do not.
    Each woman is different.”

    Really? And you are a previous lesbian/bisexual…and, you do not fancy oral? Okay, Mr. man…identify yourself, as there is no way you are a woman…lol!”

    Ha!

  208. Kms2014 says:

    “Carminna says:
    September 21, 2014 at 10:34 am
    Thanks josh for the nice reply… I am now realising that most of the men here are just lookig to grab the pictures and harass the SB in order to her doing whatever he wants for free… So far I have been contated only by man looking to engage in coffe and sex, beeing the coffe the payment…. So, I am not seeing what is the problem with a SB havig few pictures but real and most men have no picture at all and worst of that they do not act or conduct a conversation as a SD… Really disgusting..”

    Do not wait for the wrong guys to contact you…but, be proactive and contact the ones who you think will be a good fit with you, and what you offer (:

  209. Kms2014 says:

    “Josh says:
    September 21, 2014 at 10:46 am
    Here is a 38 year-old, OK-looking, bad lighting photos, 5’10″, “Prefer Not To Say” children SB is looking for:

    “someone who takes cares of all the bills, gives me 20,000 or more a month to spend how i like and doesn’t make me do anything for it, is really kind and gives me lots of love attention, cuddles, makes me laugh and lets me have lots of fun, someone who has full time help to keep everything clean, i have really bad allergies and cannot clean and i cannot cook either, so a cook and going out to eat is a must, oh and someone who provides me with a really big beautiful house with a pool hot tub, big bath tubs and lots of beautiful landscape views””

    Please stop posting snippets of my profile, Joshua :-p

  210. Kms2014 says:

    “Alexis says:
    September 21, 2014 at 12:23 pm
    “Seriously, this is not Cosmo where somehow ever woman is pleased in the same generic way.”

    Thank you!
    I seriously, seriously do NOT like receiving oral as some other women also do not.
    Each woman is different.”

    Really? And you are a previous lesbian/bisexual…and, you do not fancy oral? Okay, Mr. man…identify yourself, as there is no way you are a woman…lol!

  211. Alexis says:

    @SouthernSB

    Ok, NOW you said that… not before. Thank you for fixing that.

  212. Alexis says:

    “I admit it. I miserably failed trying to ask SBs as to how they are fun companions.”

    Nah, you can’t technically “fail” at the impossible.

    “So far I have been contated only by man looking to engage in coffe and sex, beeing the coffe the payment…”

    Exactly, you’re so right. It’s kind’ve funny.

    “most men have no picture at all”

    True but don’t discount them. Some SDs/SMs are just very concerned about their reputation and etc.

    Guys without pics very seldom write me though. I always seem to get nice gentleman who are both dressed well and are in little cute environments like gardens and mountains lol. I could say I’ve been lucky but I really think my profile keeps away a lot of the losers.

    “worst of that they do not act or conduct a conversation as a SD”

    Seriously, I’ve decided that I’m no longer wasting my time with any guy in his 20s or 30s. I get tons of those and so far all of them are way too beta-male for this type of lifestyle, at least for my taste. The older guys seem to better understand how this is all supposed to work and are not afraid of putting it all on the table which matches very well with my personality-type.

    BTW, wth is with women and all these projects? The last thing I would want is a man who I look down on. I just don’t get this project thing, yuck.

  213. SouthernSB says:

    @Alexis-Those men just happen to be my experience. I never said all Latin men are like that, just the one’s I chose. I have also had black and white boyfriends that fit the same description so I’m not stereotyping. It just so happens that those two men that I picked were very handsome and very needy. So was every other LTR I ever had in my life. I just happen to fall for needy, handsome Latin men. That just happens to be MY failing, not the whole of every Latin man that walked on the planet.

  214. SouthernSB says:

    Josh says:
    She may be 12 or 22, but many women are running around desiring similar things with different monetary numbers. When they finally decide to settle down with a non-project, hard-working and caring man, they milk him as long as the man does not snap. Once he snaps, it’s the 50-50 time. 😉

    Which is why I’m never getting married again. I know who I am and I know what I have to offer a man. I’m a fantastic girlfriend but a horrible wife. I hate the day to day things that wives have to do, the cooking, the cleaning, the taking care of the kids (all from previous marriages, since I’m over the kid thing), the little dramas, ugh…it’s all too much for me. I’d much rather be a girlfriend or a mistress, that way I get all the perks and none of the downside. There’s nothing better to me than spending time with my man and then sending him home, seriously I need my space. I don’t necessarily want to see you every single day, nor do I really want to clean your dirty undies. I have my own undies to clean. What I do want to do is spend some time together, pick your brain, laugh and joke, have great sex, travel a little and maybe go out. See, great girlfriend, horrible wife.

  215. Alexis says:

    “Seriously, this is not Cosmo where somehow ever woman is pleased in the same generic way.”

    Thank you!
    I seriously, seriously do NOT like receiving oral as some other women also do not.
    Each woman is different.

    “…as one SB told me, she read, “the guy will be thinking of the girl more if he’s kept waiting or canceled on.”

    Oh my. Dang, I’m so glad I don’t read that crap. What kind of garbage is that? That’s offensive.

    “And…bad joke time…if he has Parkinson’s then finger work may be “interesting” as well.”

    LMAO!

    “This was the final chopstick.”

    LOL

    “I have a bad habit of falling for Latin men, who very handsome but need someone to take care of them.”

    What an awful stereotype, just awful and so very inaccurate.

  216. SouthernSB says:

    @Josh, that’s the reason I got rid of my project. I wouldn’t want to date anyone (IRL or SD) as long as I had a project hanging around my house. I’m no good at juggling and I’m worse at lying, plus it just wouldn’t be fair to the person I’m dating or the SD as the case may be. I’m the type that gives as much as possible to a relationship or in this case an arrangement, and having an XBox playing project is just too much drama. At this point in my life I just want to have a good time and a little peace. I’m done with the drama, it screws up my mental health.

  217. NoStress says:

    That is Lindsay Lohan’s profile. She is on here looking for a SD.

    You left out the part about the SD paying for alcohol and auto repairs.

  218. Josh says:

    @SouthernSB

    “Are you sure she’s 38 and not 12?”

    She may be 12 or 22, but many women are running around desiring similar things with different monetary numbers. When they finally decide to settle down with a non-project, hard-working and caring man, they milk him as long as the man does not snap. Once he snaps, it’s the 50-50 time. 😉

  219. Josh says:

    @SouthernSB,

    As Jacob has touched on this topic from a different angle, many SBs are actively engaged with projects and unfortunately seek the older men to fund the same.

    Most real SDs I know don’t have amy problem funding SBs life needs and wants, but funding SB’s boy projects and to deal with the drama that goes along with those projects are dimensions most SDs could care less about.

    So there is a huge disconnect as to what SDs are seeking and what SBs are bringing to the table.

    Unless a SB is committed to better just her life and the life of her SD, she is going to be too expensive financially and emotionally to make much headway in the sugar world.

  220. SouthernSB says:

    Are you sure she’s 38 and not 12?

  221. Josh says:

    Here is a 38 year-old, OK-looking, bad lighting photos, 5’10”, “Prefer Not To Say” children SB is looking for:

    “someone who takes cares of all the bills, gives me 20,000 or more a month to spend how i like and doesn’t make me do anything for it, is really kind and gives me lots of love attention, cuddles, makes me laugh and lets me have lots of fun, someone who has full time help to keep everything clean, i have really bad allergies and cannot clean and i cannot cook either, so a cook and going out to eat is a must, oh and someone who provides me with a really big beautiful house with a pool hot tub, big bath tubs and lots of beautiful landscape views”

  222. SouthernSB says:

    @RSD-Thank you for thinking my story is inspiring. I just see it as a side effect of watching too many movies and reading too many cheesy Hollywood based novels. Heck I just got rid of my last project (not the hubby) just six months ago (not the hubby, but very cute, very Latin and very addicted). It took him stealing me practically out of house and home to get me over that one. One day I just woke up and realized that I couldn’t take care of these men anymore. I was feeling worse than if I was their mothers!!! So I came to SA so I could meet men who were on the same level that I was on instead of “throwing pearls to the swine,” like my mother loves to tell me I’m doing. Seriously, should I ever come to this blog talking about some Latin man that I want to quit this for, steer me in the direction of either an adult literacy program or a library so I can volunteer instead of wasting my time with these projects.

  223. Carminna says:

    Thanks josh for the nice reply… I am now realising that most of the men here are just lookig to grab the pictures and harass the SB in order to her doing whatever he wants for free… So far I have been contated only by man looking to engage in coffe and sex, beeing the coffe the payment…. So, I am not seeing what is the problem with a SB havig few pictures but real and most men have no picture at all and worst of that they do not act or conduct a conversation as a SD… Really disgusting..

  224. complicatedSB says:

    I’m in a relationship so discretion is pretty critical for me as well. My lack of face pics (I do have full length shots, etc) is probably costing me some POT SDs but the right SD will understand. I’m a patient gal.

  225. SouthernSB says:

    @Josh Touche’, that’s why I decided to start sugaring. I got tired of doing projects, nothing ever comes of them anyway. I’d rather be a project than make one. It’s very exhausting, bad for one’s mental health, and it costs wayyyy to much money, since my projects never want to change.

  226. RSD says:

    @Rachel SB, yes, even though discretion is often thought of in terms of the married SD, society often unfairly judges the SB in a more negative light, so discretion is equally important for any SB with a meaningful personal and professional life. In my case, my close friends and coworkers and some family members know about my sugar life, but I don’t need random people who barely know me gossiping and causing drama.

  227. RSD says:

    @SouthernSB, your story is inspiring :)

  228. RSD says:

    @Carminna, Best is to put a full body pic with face cropped or blurred out for privacy and then have a face pic either as a private photo to unveil once a message or two have been exchanged, or she can email a face pic. I think blurred face pics are a good selling point for an SB, because it generally confirms that the girl is not a pro and is concerned about discretion.

    I am extremely picky in terms of both body type and face, and I don’t always follow the societal stereotype in terms of what I find sexy, so real pics are important. I’d say 15% of SBs use pics that are not their own or not representative of what they look like in general or now. But those SBs are wasting their time; they’d never make it past the first date unless they meet my standards.

  229. Rachel SB says:

    Hello all! After 3 years off the site, I am back. Nice to see some familiar names, and a slew of new ones. I love the blog and was thrilled to see the current topic. Discretion is a must in almost all sugar relationships. I for one require discretion, for separation of my persona;/professional life. Obviously I’ve talked about my professional life with my past SD’s, however the discretion comes into play to ensure I HAVE a profession. Although we accept the sugar world, some people aren’t ready to embrace two consenting adults (sometimes more) agreeing on an “arrangement”. Last thing I want is to lose my career… reputation is everything!

    Anyways, I’m glad to be back. I’ve got LOTS of work to do. I’ve got to update my profile, new pics etc. Time to call my neighbor the photographer!

  230. Josh says:

    I admit it. I miserably failed trying to ask SBs as to how they are fun companions. 100% of them have no clue and simply stop responding at certain point.

    I will try something different. 😉

  231. Josh says:

    Carminna,

    I have no problem if an SB uses fake photos. So be it. As long as the photos used look close enough interms of height, shape, etc.

    I have problem, though, with SBs who don’t show full length photos of either themselves or the fake person. Most of them are fat and try to pass themselves as “average”, and worse as “slim.” or “athletic”.

  232. Carminna says:

    Hello…
    I am a newby to the website,not to the SB world) and I have already some messages from some menbers complainning, all the SBs in this website have fake photos to deceive the SDs…My photos are real and I made that clear. However, I agree with all the SBs,we also need our discretion… Some of us have jobs and do not want co workers or our own boss to find out we are in a website looking to give pleasure to our SD…. Do not forget that this world is very prejudiced.

  233. Josh says:

    Please allow me to write it in generic terms, which is true for many many women’s projects:

    I have a habit of falling for blah blah blah, who are blah blah blah but need ME to take care of them.

  234. Josh says:

    I have a bad habit of falling for Latin men, who very handsome but need someone to take care of them. They are my biggest vice.

    Read the bold phrases that are main characteristics of a typical project. 😉

    Please allow me to write it in generic terms, which is true for many many women’s projects:

    I have a habit of falling for , who are blah blah blah but need someone to take care of them.

  235. SouthernSB says:

    I didn’t even know that first post went though. Please ignore the first post and read the second one. The second one is more to the truth than the first one.
    @Josh, my project was my husband, who came from nothing and was an illegal, I truly loved him but he got deported. We had a very passionate marriage with a lot of Latin drama. He gave me my beautiful daughter. I last time I saw him was 14 years ago. Last I heard he got married again, without divorcing me and he has two other kids.
    I thought we were going to be a rags to riches story. But you can’t really get ahead with a man who can’t read in two languages. And there was no way I was going to his small country in Central America. I have a bad habit of falling for Latin men, who very handsome but need someone to take care of them. They are my biggest vice.

  236. Josh says:

    @SouthernSB

    “Maybe you guys need to find girls from bigger families. At least that way you know you will get a girl from a long line of horny women.”

    Now this is the SouthernSB original. I will keep that in mind. 😉

  237. SouthernSB says:

    Sometimes I don’t even know who you people are!!! :) Honestly, I don’t know what’s going on with all you men talking about all these mysterious women who are bad at sex. I never had any complaints with what I was doing, and in fact, I use to have young men tell me that I should just chuck my myriad of small towns and just go to Cali and become a porn star. 😉 I’m multiorgasmic, I love to give oral, if I’m in the right mood I’m up for anal, I use to be a squirter, and I can have an orgasm vaginally. To tell the truth I can have an orgasm just reading about sex or watching porn and I don’t even have to masturbate, and God knows I don’t have to fake anything. Maybe you guys need to find girls from bigger families. At least that way you know you will get a girl from a long line of horny women.

  238. Josh says:

    @SouthernSB

    You may have called your project whatever all these years, and that is perfectly alright…

    Now, reclassify him as the project you took up. Reclassify all the circumstances around the project appropriately and you will get your answer as to WHY it happened at 25 with THAT specific project and not with the other projects you had previously.

    A brutally honest reevaluation of THAT project vis-à-vis mind blowing sex would be enlightening to the readers here. 😉

  239. SouthernSB says:

    Sometimes I don’t even know who you people are!!! :) Honestly, it must be the ages of the SBs you men are getting, because I didn’t start having mind blowing sex until I was 25. I don’t know why it was 25 but at that age sex got a hell of a lot better. In fact before 25 sex was something I could either take or leave. But something snapped at 25, maybe it was because I was in love with my project or I was more in touch with my body or I got more confident, I don’t know, but for me 25 was the magic number.

  240. Josh says:

    The above two posts pertain to two different SBs. The first post is about one SB’s profile. The other post is from the text communication.

  241. Josh says:

    When asked what kind of activities she is open to during a monthly arrangement amounting to several thousand dollars allowance, this is what I was honored with:

    “just know I like to be treated like a queen.. I like to go out eat, enjoy some wonderful food.. go see a movie.. typical date stuff. ;)”

    She has no clue that the SD needs to hear what the heck is in it for him except that she will allow him to dip it a few times a month.

  242. Josh says:

    “Looking to be spoiled and pampered…I love shoes, clothes, money, nails done, hair done, all the above. :)”

    Right on sweetheart…SDs are gonna line up any minute now. 😉

  243. flyR says:

    @RSD “”Have you guys actually talked to women? Most young women don’t even understand how sex with a hot barely-legal could possibly be bad.””

    Most also fail to understand how much sensual pleasure they are missing in their designated role of little more than sperm dumpster

  244. flyR says:

    BrazilianSB

    For someone who cares one of the easiest things to do is to teach the partner ways to communicate various shades of good. No bad communications just good. Since it impolite and often difficult to communicate with your mouth full, a tactile substitute is needed. Simply tapping at a frequency which increases with pleasure asks for no feedback . I think it also causes the partner to focus what specifically feels good.

  245. BrazilianSB says:

    Useful tips, feels like there could’ve been more though. Maybe on another post. :)

  246. Josh says:

    “There are tens of millions of folks in country who have never seen the ocean or any body of water stretching to the horizon”

    There are millions of people who have not seen mountains or corn fiels “stretching to the horizon” and your point was, grandpa?

  247. Josh says:

    @gtt_envy

    “@Josh, go on a date get laid or something you are starting to become 50% of all the posts again!”

    Do you know the average number of times 30+ year old sexually active men are doing it in America? 😉

  248. RSD says:

    @Josh, “Penning down scenes from NR movies does not constitute real experience with women.”

    Exactly, everything rather realistic I say is countered by fantasy.

  249. RSD says:

    Have you guys actually talked to women? Most young women don’t even understand how sex with a hot barely-legal could possibly be bad.

  250. gtt_envy says:

    @Josh, go on a date get laid or something you are starting to become 50% of all the posts again!

  251. flyR says:

    RSD There’s no delusion that a few words are going to radically change the direction of an SD or SB, but to some extent it is like looking at a travelogue – exposure to unknown worlds. Whether you decide to visit is your decision.

    There are tens of millions of folks in country who have never seen the ocean or any body of water stretching to the horizon

  252. Josh says:

    Penning down scenes from NR movies does not constitute real experience with women.

  253. flyR says:

    @RSD – Subtle hints that you are doing it right

    Physical – she can’t fake certain reactions

    Asking – Declines fancy dinner out in favor of snacks and wine, She walks into my place , takes her glass of wine and proceeds directly to the bedroom. Takes my pillow and tosses it to the end of the bed where I usually prop my head during some phase of oral sex. Repeats after dinner.

    I’m summoned to the door to explain to the nice police officer that nobody is being murdered as the neighbors some distance away have suggested

  254. Josh says:

    @yougottaberinsingyetnotdiscussing

    “Why is it that the women who post here seem contrary to project herding rinsers?”

    Because most of them:

    1. have done enough grown-up male projects to be so over them already?

    2. are busy with their children raising projects instead?

    2. are skipping discussion of their rinsing activities here for ibvious reasons?

  255. Josh says:

    @yougottabetellinglongerstories

    “he was born and raised within a culture whose belief is that the only thing worse than the vagina is the pig.”

    And which culture would that be?

  256. Josh says:

    Sweetheart, it’s better not to raise expectations just because this is sugar. Women are women.

    However, it would be silly not to enjoy when surprised on the positive side.

  257. Elaine says:

    Hmmmm, why am I not surprised anymore that some blog SDs often complain about getting bad sex….!?

  258. Why is it that the women who post here seem contrary to project herding rinsers? Could it possibly be that there are only 20 exceptions to the rules you conjure?

  259. Tardive dykensia is often seen in people with extensive history of drug use, particularly crack cocaine.

    Desire for mechanical sex is probably best satisfied with a woman who is paid for such performance, ie a prostitute. Your experience might be further enhanced if said prostitute has tardive dyskinesia. Might even get yourself a happy hour discount. Triple score!

  260. Jacob says:

    @Josh @RSD
    ==================
    ““First, I’m with Josh on this one–the SBs should have their “projects” to give them good sex”

    There you go…most of the coeds hookup with older men to fund their projects anyway.

    “(and to soak up their feminine need for needless drama)”

    Hahahaha! For women “no drama” translates into “no passion”. Therefore, they intentionally create drama by moving their men’s cheese. Let the drama begin.”
    ===================

    IMHO, the presence of a project, especially a long term or steady one, makes for even more drama than usual. I have zero interest in funding a conduit to a de facto pimp.

    For me, one of the goals for funding an SB is that someday she will be able to walk on her own two feet; the presence of a project of her own or a de facto pimp makes the effort all the more costly and the ultimate result precarious.

  261. There’s nothing more arousing than oral fixation with someone with whom you genuinely enjoy sharing. I once dated this guy who had a gorgeous, well-functioning magic stick attached to a beautifully sculpted body. He said that no one serenaded his magic mic the way that I did. Sir gorgeous never did reciprocate. He was actually a pretty selfish lover, most concerned with his own pleasure, which mattered to me more than receiving oral pleasure itself. Afterall, I have no problem having spontaneous orgasms (of both voluntary an involuntary varieties). After some time, the pleasure Id once gotten from singing him lovely tunes waned, and I stopped serenading him as much. When he asked why I told him that he sucked at sharing (in more than just the oral sense), and it affected my desire. Longing for the days when he would awaken to morning serenades, and for nights when warm, wet lips served as his night cap, he decided to give this sharing thing a try.

    Ever see a fish on a deck in a small pool of water? Perfect….welcome to my experience. Poor guy’s tongue flopped about the deck in an asynchronous rhythm as he desperately gasped for air. Are suffocation and drowning the same experiences? I watched him struggle for a little bit (arms flailing, legs kicking) while I reflected on my day, and planned my next day’s errands in my head.

    (Thought #1: Oh shit, I never did take that lady at table 43 and extra side of olives…hope she managed well.

    Thought #2: I should really finish watching those RedBox movies and return them…they’re only supposed to cost a dollar. I’m doing it wrong.

    Thought #3: What am I going to wear tomorrow? Wonder what the forecast will bring.

    [sighs]

    Thought #4: Plan of action for tomorrow: post office, bank, interview, homework, dinner gathering. RedBox the following day :/. I’ll definitely win on the following day!

    Thought #5: This poor guy is really drowning. )

    In full disclosure, and to his credit, I should share that he was born and raised within a culture whose belief is that the only thing worse than the vagina is the pig. And there he drowns. I raise from my resting position, peer out into the waters (hand over brows), spot the victim, loosen the wedgy from my tight red swimsuit, grab my lifesaver, and skip (yes, skip) down to save him (slow motion shot, please). I helped him limp to shore where he collapsed, breaths ever so shallow. He held his chest with one hand, and reached out for mine with the other. I accepted this gesture as remorse and gratitude. Surely, he would’ve benefited from lessons.

    I dumped him a week later over Chinese food. Like flyR pointed out…how someone eats tells a lot about the type of lover they’ll be. Here again, he sucked at sharing, and the sounds he made while fully distending his jaw with each bite were reminiscent of his near-drowning episode the week earlier. This was the final chopstick. Not sure why he felt the need to eat every meal like it was absolutely his last, and that he had only one breath with which to consume it.

    No thank you, Mr. Piggy.

  262. RSD says:

    If not Parkinson’s, it could be tardive dyskinesia, which cases “tongue-thrusting”. Seems like flyr’s SBs would be particularly partial to that.

  263. Josh says:

    And…bad joke time…if he has Parkinson’s then finger work may be “interesting” as well.

  264. Josh says:

    @RSD

    ““that that that”–there has to be a rule they teach in “collage” not to use the word “that” three times in a row in one sentence”

    Methinks that the SB may have learnt it from Barbara Walters, Oprah or the likes when they feign keeping distance from what she is saying…

  265. RSD says:

    @Josh, “I am sure that you and your 80-something buddies have such patience.”

    Well, at 80-something oral may be our only option :/

  266. RSD says:

    “that that that”–there has to be a rule they teach in “collage” not to use the word “that” three times in a row in one sentence

  267. RSD says:

    @flyr, and how exactly do you know that your SBs aren’t just faking it to get you to eventually stop some oral action that feels horrid to them yet they feel compelled to comply with out of financial desperation? Is it their moans that give it away? Or because they told you they had an orgasm?

    You don’t think I’ve had horrid sex with an SB who then tells me that that was the best sex ever? Do I conclude from that that that was the best sex ever? No, I conclude that it sucked and either (a) she actually enjoyed it but I didn’t or (b) she is being polite or (c) that everyone else she slept with really sucked. In reality, it will take a lot of truly getting to know the girl to find out which of those it was, and in most sugar relationships, that will never be the case.

    Also, it is not possible for all sex to be amazing. At least half the girls I sleep with have to be below average for the girls I’ve slept with. So how flyr has everyone equally amazing is mathematically implausible. I understand that you think you’re the master sexual coach, but I’m no idiot; even the best coach can’t turn just anyone into a star athlete. They may be better than with a crappy coach or no coach at all, but the average person will still suck and never make it as a pro.

  268. Josh says:

    I am sure that you and your 80-something buddies have such patience.

  269. flyR says:

    Being waved off from oral can also reflect

    a-She doesn’t want or trust you to have the control

    b-If you are just stopping by to check the oral box before rushing off to conventional sex

    c- she’s discovered that someone sent a mechanic to do an artist’s job.

  270. Josh says:

    Forget generic advice, unless a woman is trained in relationship counseling, and has references to prove her success in the field, even one specific woman’s advice to a man in dealing with one specific woman is full of shit.

    Only people like flyR seek such advice, are promptly screwed over, and don’t even know what hit them.

  271. flyR says:

    “First, I’m with Josh on this one–the SBs should have their “projects” to give them good sex (and to soak up their feminine need for needless drama); it’s not exactly my problem to endanger my life to give her an orgasm. Also, I don’t need an SB to get overly attached to me or my penis or tongue or whatever; so many end up in love with me anyways, bad sex and all, that further sources of attachment are not desired.

    Second, some women do orgasm with just vaginal intercourse. And some women get multiple orgasms from vaginal intercourse. If the SB I am with is among the unfortunate women who does not orgasm with vaginal intercourse, that’s not exactly my problem, ”

    Yikes……. your “not my problem” just happens to be my opportunity. Thus I’m pleased that you are creating more opportunities for those of us who enjoy such things.

    One of my absolute checklist items it “do I have an intense desire to share oral sex with this woman and is she going to be a happy partner? I’ve learned not to beat around the bush and simply ask during the initial screening although just screening for other stuff is 90% accurate.

    Many of the younger SB’s have never had a partner with the patience to explore their potential……

    But I feel like I am trying to explain planetary mechanics to the sandbox crowd

  272. RSD says:

    On the subject of Cosmo and generic crap advice that women read, apparently these magazines also recommend that women show up late and cancel at times because, as one SB told me, she read, “the guy will be thinking of the girl more if he’s kept waiting or canceled on.”

    I told her that it is true, when I am waiting for a girl to come, I am thinking of her the entire time, but my thought is, “I should dump her and find a girl who is on time.” And if she cancels, yes I think of her a lot too, but my consuming thought is, “Should I dump her now or give her one more chance and dump her then?”

  273. RSD says:

    Also, despite all of what is said here that every woman secretly wants oral, it is simply not true in my experience. With a number of women I’ve trusted, I have very naturally during making out gone down there with my tongue, only to be stopped prior to reaching that point and told that oral does not feel good to her and that we should just do it.

    Seriously, this is not Cosmo where somehow ever woman is pleased in the same generic way.

    And men are not all the same either. I understand the stereotype that every man wants a blowjob. But I typically stop girls from performing oral on me, because I pretty much know I won’t orgasm with oral (well, I did one time), and the chances are 80% that it will suck, 10% that it will be decent but only for 30 seconds before it starts to suck, and 10% that it will be good. So the generic advice that the man would love a bj just doesn’t hold for me.

  274. Josh says:

    @RSD

    “First, I’m with Josh on this one–the SBs should have their “projects” to give them good sex”

    There you go…most of the coeds hookup with older men to fund their projects anyway.

    “(and to soak up their feminine need for needless drama)”

    Hahahaha! For women “no drama” translates into “no passion”. Therefore, they intentionally create drama by moving their men’s cheese. Let the drama begin…

  275. RSD says:

    @Josh, “Reading too many women advice columns does not make you an expert.”

    Amen

  276. Josh says:

    @yougottastopgivingmisleadingadvice

    flyR is the kinda guy women will advise other men to listen to but will not put out with him.

    Reading too many women advice columns does not make you an expert. All it makes you is a “repeater” of the same nonsense women put out to amuse themselves. 😉

  277. RSD says:

    First, I’m with Josh on this one–the SBs should have their “projects” to give them good sex (and to soak up their feminine need for needless drama); it’s not exactly my problem to endanger my life to give her an orgasm. Also, I don’t need an SB to get overly attached to me or my penis or tongue or whatever; so many end up in love with me anyways, bad sex and all, that further sources of attachment are not desired.

    Second, some women do orgasm with just vaginal intercourse. And some women get multiple orgasms from vaginal intercourse. If the SB I am with is among the unfortunate women who does not orgasm with vaginal intercourse, that’s not exactly my problem, any more that it is an SBs problem that she performs horridly in bed yet I continue to see her.

  278. gtt_envy says:

    @Elaine, there is more than a grain of truth in what she says. While I’m not in the “bang solely cause I want too” category. I do know 3 previous SB’s that we occasionally get freaky and I give them a gift $200-$300. I don’t know what would happen if I didn’t give it I’ve never tried, but it’s not like they are checking a account or anything before we hang out.

    None are on sa anymore all have boyfriends. 20, 20, and 23, so all I can think is the sex is good enough that a little token and our date is enough for them. We do talk here and there though!!

    Peckers don’t do well on giving orgasms…..but good clitoral vibrators do. Every SB I’ve ever had get’s one lol 😉 always a good time!! Some start with “Oh, I don’t use toys” and then end with “OMG, can I have that!! That’s awesome!”

    As for the blog topic most SB’s need discretion, but the best ones don’t. Being able to do things is so much better. I must have discretion if local, but away I like to have fun dates planned.

    As I’ve said before I don’t give my last name, am not “googable”, use apps, Voice or similar to communicate, have a fake ID if anyone asks for verification (none ever have) with fake address “46 unit condo building no unit #” and a AMEX with just my first name on it.

    Can’t have the LTR finding out about my escapades!! Regardless of what I do in sugar she will always be my first choice!! She rocks on every level 😉 I’m just broken and feel like “I need” variety and new experiences.

  279. “flyR says:
    September 19, 2014 at 11:47 pm
    @RSD “I don’t know, flyr, what sets us apart. I’ve only once been asked by any girl for oral. Maybe something about me screams, “No oral here!””

    Point 1 – Deep in the femme psyche is the wisdom that ” if I have to beg for oral it’s not likely to be pleasurable, enduring or truly orgasmic. While a guy would be happy and have no problem getting off in the superbowl stands, the feminine, oral induced, orgasm seems to hide in the midst of disturbance, rush or lack of enthusiasm. The creak of her “lovers” full protection rubber suit (similar to those worn by ebola workers) further pollutes the love nest.”

    You guys need to listen to flyR. He’s doing it right.

  280. Josh says:

    I agree with Elaine. Most mencannot give women orgasm through their “magic stick”, and hence use either tongue, fingers, props or all of the above to make them come before the magic stick gets involved.

    All is not lost if STD is a concern and tongue is not engaged.

    For those who want to learn more about the use of fingers need to learn tantra and related Chinese techniques being used for the past 5,000 years.

  281. gtt_envy says:

    So, another week and two dates. 1 a 23 year old RN, mixed, 5’4@130, very fun, bubbly, great kisser, great oral, good in bed, definitely a official SB.

    Date 2, MBA student 24, very pretty 5’9@127, but not sexy if that makes sense to the guys out there. Not bubbly, fun, silly, more like “I’m beautiful, I’m smart, I’m diva material, ooooh is that a new M5 I love those! Do you like my new bag I just got it?”

    To use a old school word she was incredibly “stuck up” lol.

  282. Elaine says:

    Serious!? what woman would actually ever ASK for oral!?

    If this is not a spontaneous thing that comes naturally and voluntary during sex, well forget about it then…I would never ask.
    But do realize that for most women oral is the best -if not the only!- way to orgasm.
    You think your magic stick is doing the trick and making her cum?
    Yeah, sure, and Santa Claus is real!

    Of course, if you can fully enjoy sex that is only enjoyable for you, don’t even bother about her pleasure.
    Because you get what you are paying for; a vagina.
    Maybe she will go that extra mile and even fake an orgasm to make you feel good as a lover, if she is a very good SB.

    But forget about ever getting mindblowing sex as long as there is only a financial reward in it for her.

    There once was a question here, if an SB would continue seeing her SD even without sugar?
    Well if we have great sex, yes I would! (am actually even doing that).
    Would I in other cases? No.

    That is the difference, for great and unforgettable sex, it takes 2 to tango…..

  283. flyR says:

    @RSD “I don’t know, flyr, what sets us apart. I’ve only once been asked by any girl for oral. Maybe something about me screams, “No oral here!””

    Point 1 – Deep in the femme psyche is the wisdom that ” if I have to beg for oral it’s not likely to be pleasurable, enduring or truly orgasmic. While a guy would be happy and have no problem getting off in the superbowl stands, the feminine, oral induced, orgasm seems to hide in the midst of disturbance, rush or lack of enthusiasm. The creak of her “lovers” full protection rubber suit (similar to those worn by ebola workers) further pollutes the love nest.

  284. Josh says:

    RSD says:
    September 18, 2014 at 8:38 pm
    I should add that in my experience women are even worse at giving blowjobs than they are at sex. And that’s pretty bad.

    Russian SB says:
    September 19, 2014 at 2:01 am
    Only man know how to deliver pleasure to another man :))))))

    Josh says:
    September 19, 2014 at 7:08 am
    @Russian SB
    The problem isn’t that women can’t. The problem is they don’t. Big difference.
    Arrange for some vodka as I will share some deep thoughts on this specific topic soon.

    As promised here are the “deep thoughts” over vodka for the readers. Since I am not a vodka person for me it is over something else. 😉

    RSD’s thesis is that:

    1. Women suck at sex.
    2. Women suck at blowjob even more.

    Such assertions are immediately and categorically refuted, out of hand, by women as well as their mangina supporters. Why?

    The reason is that women don’t always suck at #1. There are specific conditions when they actually do it pretty well:

    1. They are trying to enroll a project. Here sex is genuine, and extremely pleasurable to the potential project.

    2. They are actively engaged in a project in its pre-sabotage stage. Here sex is genuine and extremely pleasurable to the project.

    3. They are under the some kind of “situation” where non-performance can have not-so-positive repercussions. Here is sex could be fake to genuine, and could be so-so to pleasurable to the man.

    As far as blowjob, most women do suck it at big time, ironically by not knowing how to properly suck. 😉 Most never get around to learning it as they don’t consider it part of sex. Every one of them have reasons of their own. Some claim that they do it and like it. But in reality they CANNOT make a man ejaculate through blowjob only. And like always, there are exceptions.

  285. Alexis says:

    “Am quite the fussy and proper hot dog connoisseur and only eat the finest bratwurst imported from Germany, when I do eat them….and cut them up with a sharp knife into petite little bites smothered in ketchup!!”

    Total Bobbit there, yikes!

  286. RSD says:

    I don’t know, flyr, what sets us apart. I’ve only once been asked by any girl for oral. Maybe something about me screams, “No oral here!”

  287. Nicegirl says:

    LMAO…. seriously…

  288. flyR says:

    RSD – It’s an individual question not necessarily give give and but rather two people each wanting to give and wanting receive.

    I really encourage those SD’s who do not want to participate to stand by your principles, do not be intimidated into such disgusting things as some evil SB’s might wish……

  289. Nicegirl says:

    RSD… I suppose your right and yes fair is fair. Thank goodness we have choices!!!

  290. RSD says:

    @Nicegirl, well I will neither ask you to suck my hotdog, nor offer to eat your peach. Fair is fair

  291. Nicegirl says:

    Ugh…if a man wants me to suck his… hotdog then he better eat my peach, and ENJOY it as I will enjoy my hotdog ;o)

    I agree that oral with a person with less than stellar hygiene is, well, discussing but would you even date someone with less than stellar hygiene? I know I wouldn’t.

  292. flyR says:

    The beauty of the sugar bowl is that it affords the wise SB the opportunity to exercise selectivity not only in what pleasures she will give but also pleasures she will receive.

  293. flyR says:

    @RSD “@flyr, I date a lot of super skinny girls who are the pickiest eaters (thigh gaps don’t come from eating too many donuts). Maybe my sample is skewed as a result. If I sleep with fatties, they’ll be amazing.

    Y’all missed the note that “eating healthy is not picky”

    Apparently you have joined Josh’s workout club Jumpers To Conclusions

  294. Jacob says:

    The Atlantic just published quite a sympathetic piece on SA.

  295. Jacob says:

    Some poons don’t smell like anything at all. Yes, I was shocked too the first time I found one.

  296. RSD says:

    I’m with Josh on the topic of hot dogs. I’ll put hot dogs on my list right above cunnilingus with a girl with STDs and right below cunnilingus with a girl without STDs.

    Another thing about cunnilingus is that I don’t like smelling anything that smells of anything, good or bad. So if it smells like anything down there–and I’m being told that it always will– I’m not into it.

  297. RSD says:

    @flyr, I date a lot of super skinny girls who are the pickiest eaters (thigh gaps don’t come from eating too many donuts). Maybe my sample is skewed as a result. If I sleep with fatties, they’ll be amazing.

  298. Kms2014 says:

    Not in my world, but in your world were women don’t do dagum nothin’ right wid your hot dog, then….yes 😉

  299. Josh says:

    Sweetheart wouldn’t you agree that hot dog and properly in one sentence are oxymoronic. 😉

  300. Kms2014 says:

    Joshua, you must properly suck the sometimes tough outer exterior to get past the rubbery concocktion, in order for it to be done right…haven’t you ever eaten a hot dog properly before? Eeeh gads, sir!

  301. Kms2014 says:

    But only the best and most expensive organic ketchup made with Roma toemahhtoes will do!

  302. Kms2014 says:

    I was teasing, of course….;) Am quite the fussy and proper hot dog connoisseur and only eat the finest bratwurst imported from Germany, when I do eat them….and cut them up with a sharp knife into petite little bites smothered in ketchup!!

  303. Josh says:

    Wild old wives tales and emperical analyses are two entirely different things. 😉

  304. Josh says:

    @Kms2014, I have unsuccessfully attempted to eat hot dogs a few times in my life but just cannot swallow the rubbery fatty concoction. Just no can do! :(

  305. Kms2014 says:

    You should see me eat a hot dog, flyR…if awards could be given for sexy hot dog consumption, hmmm!! :-ppppp I mean…..:-O

  306. flyR says:

    I think watching a woman eat is a pretty good indicator of how she will approach sex. The very fussy eaters (healthy is not fussy) are generally into control not pleasure for pleasure’s sake. The woman who shares her food or takes some of yours, loves finger foods etc is more likely to put pleasure ahead of ego and protocol. No warranties expressed or implied but fussiness should be a danger sign.

  307. Josh says:

    This post clearly demonstrates that grandpa flyR’s experience with women is more wishful than boots-on-the-ground. 😉

  308. flyR says:

    I’ll disagree with Alexis to the extent that I think some women can be very good at technical sex, but not really into it. The desired goal is to get it over with, convince the man to return or stay with her or as demonstration of her power.

    Thankfully most women are full partners in pleasure when they feel they are partners not slaves, employees etc.

    Sugar can strain the start as almost by definition we are with people whom we would not be with in the absence of sugar. A little respect and good behavior helps close the gap.

  309. Nicegirl says:

    “I suppose I can stop envisioning you tying women under your bed now ;-p.”

    LOL – I though the very same thing so I had to ask the question ;o)

  310. “LOL. The restraint system is anchored under the mattress/bed, but you are supposed to be on the bed.”

    Ha! Something else completely! I suppose I can stop envisioning you tying women under your bed now ;-p.

  311. Jacob says:

    “Clearly youve never had a culture taken. The point was that while youre demanding your date take a test to the restroom, you should collect a specimen of your own.”

    First of all, I do not demand. The SB has the freedom to leave at any moment. Certainly conditions have to be met before there can be an arrangement or intimacy with me; results of some of the tests pertain to the type of arrangement that can be most helpful to the SB, as they cut through some of the potential BS from SB 😉 I do not want to be supporting someone’s drug habits or contributing to their fall from grace.

    Of course I took the tests myself, as soon as the kits arrived, just to see whether there it produces false positives. Identical drug test kits were also used previously for job applicants.

    “Fell alseep on the floor next to my bed once, and woke up under the bed somehow. For a few brief moments in my delirious awakening, I thought Id been buried alive. Was not at all aroused. Nope.”

    LOL. The restraint system is anchored under the mattress/bed, but you are supposed to be on the bed.

  312. Nicegirl says:

    ygbkm… this interesting contraption has nothing to do with “under the actual bed” lol

    Hand and foot restraints that strap to the underside of your mattress. I looked it up and with a trustworthy partner it could be quite fun.

  313. “Jacob says:
    September 19, 2014 at 10:26 am
    “Im sorry, dear… Did say you prefer tossing salad, but first you’d like for me to stick this q-tip into the opening of your penis so that we can then decide what to have for dessert? No cheesecake, Im guessing.”

    LOL. More evidence screening is key. Some SB’s apparently can’t stay away from the sadistic emotional need to inflict physical pain on strangers.

    There is nothing funny about doing things that can be painful to another person for real.”

    Clearly youve never had a culture taken. The point was that while youre demanding your date take a test to the restroom, you should collect a specimen of your own.

    “I had at one time tied down an SB on my under-bed restraining system (after she placed her own hands and ankles into the loops after I showed her the system).”

    Fell alseep on the floor next to my bed once, and woke up under the bed somehow. For a few brief moments in my delirious awakening, I thought Id been buried alive. Was not at all aroused. Nope.

  314. Jacob says:

    It must have triggered something in her, much to my own surprise. The relationship wasn’t quite at a level where I could just take free reign of her body, yet. So making her feel safe and not regret anything after she wakes up from the trance-like state was more important, and the right thing to do.

    Yes, the system is/was a lot of fun, when tried on later occasions.

  315. Nicegirl says:

    Jacob. I love that… to bad she wouldn’t repeat her safe word. Looks like she missed out on some D/s fun.

  316. Jacob says:

    It’s a fun and inconspicuous system for ravishing the willing girl 😉 Do a Google search, and there are even pictures of the system in use.

  317. Nicegirl says:

    Under-bed restraining system… do tell. This sounds interesting…

  318. Jacob says:

    correction: It’s just _not_ worth taking the risks.

  319. Jacob says:

    “Im sorry, dear… Did say you prefer tossing salad, but first you’d like for me to stick this q-tip into the opening of your penis so that we can then decide what to have for dessert? No cheesecake, Im guessing.”

    LOL. More evidence screening is key. Some SB’s apparently can’t stay away from the sadistic emotional need to inflict physical pain on strangers.

    There is nothing funny about doing things that can be painful to another person for real. I had at one time tied down an SB on my under-bed restraining system (after she placed her own hands and ankles into the loops after I showed her the system). As soon as I started to tighten the straps, her eyes glinted and she looked like falling into a tonic trance. I asked her to repeat the safe-word before proceeding further, and she failed/refused to say the word for test despite repeated prompting. I immediately released her from the restraint system. It’s just worth taking the risks.

  320. flyR says:

    NO NO NO The quote (“””“I should add that in my experience women are even worse at giving blowjobs than they are at sex. And that’s pretty bad.””””) was from someone else. I was commenting on it…. and expressing my total disagreement.

    My feelings are exactly the opposite ………. Most women, when inspired, are very good if not extraordinary lovers and purveyors of extraordinary oral sex. The vast majority of women are inspired by respond to the common courtesy of ladies first.

  321. “While we are waiting for the salad course, dear, could you take this test kit to the bathroom, then by the time we are done with the main course, we will have the scientific input to help us decide what we shall have for desert or whether we will have a second date. LOL.”

    Im sorry, dear…

    Did say you prefer tossing salad, but first you’d like for me to stick this q-tip into the opening of your penis so that we can then decide what to have for dessert? No cheesecake, Im guessing.

  322. Nicegirl says:

    Who would say no to oral??? I can’t believe I read that correctly. I agree with ygmkm… you are doing it wrong.

  323. Josh says:

    “Youre doing it wrong.”

    @Russian SB, is vodka ready?

  324. “I should add that in my experience women are even worse at giving blowjobs than they are at sex. And that’s pretty bad.”

    “@flyr, it seems like our experiences are very different. Even when I have offered oral stimulation to GFs and trusted SBs in the past, the vast majority had no interest. Same with me, I have very little interest in oral sex being performed on me.

    Also with all the effort you place into pleasing your woman, you may end up with more fakers. Just saying…”

    Youre doing it wrong.

  325. “1. Based on what you have read in the chapters, if you meet a 27yo virgin, should you recommend her/him take HPV vaccination?”

    Yes…to protect her against HPV that her partner might not realize he is carrying, and to protect her from future risks.

  326. “You can do the looky look test…”

    Bah!

  327. Nicegirl says:

    I don’t suggest only few women are good at sex…that would be an ignorant statement as I don’t know how good most women are in bed. I do however know that if you are just going through the motions of sex it more than likely isn’t good.

  328. Alexis says:

    and all this STD talk

    *cringes*

    Yikes!

  329. Alexis says:

    “This is not a rule but there is definite truth behind it, if a girl is not into what she is doing or does not genuinely enjoy having sex or giving blow jobs then she will not excel at it. We are generally good at what we enjoy.”

    Eeeeek! By the above it would seem that very, very few women enjoy sex. Yep, so that can’t be accurate.

    I think it has more to do with being selfish and lazy as it takes generosity and effort to pleasure someone sexually.

  330. Nicegirl says:

    FlyR – This is not a rule but there is definite truth behind it, if a girl is not into what she is doing or does not genuinely enjoy having sex or giving blow jobs then she will not excel at it. We are generally good at what we enjoy.

  331. gentle(man)soul says:

    flyR says:

    “I should add that in my experience women are even worse at giving blowjobs than they are at sex. And that’s pretty bad.”

    There are many incredible Gifs and porn sites that give very clear demonstration of sex technique . Oral technique I learned from lesbian porn watching one beautiful girl pleasuring another. Who knows better than another girl ? It’s all out there if you want to learn it . Girls need to be interested in pleasuring their man and study it. Then practice IRL with their Daddy.

  332. Jacob says:

    Explained above. Only in the case where the candidate is presenting herself as a current student.

  333. Josh says:

    Hmmm, what would be the reason to ask for “valid current student id”?

  334. Jacob says:

    LOL. The student ID part is not so much as a qualifier/disqualifier (like the HIV test), but having basis for meaningful discussion on an arrangement that makes sense for the SB. It’s rather disappointing that young girls nowadays are so keen on putting on a respectable facade that some of them don’t know when it is crucial to have an honest discussion; it’s like lying to the doctor and risking getting wrong prescription in return. Met a pretty 20yo recently who claimed she was a medical student; however, from bits and pieces of conversation as well as behavior pattern, I can guess that she is not, at least not currently. She is worried about her own long term career future . . . I can easily bankroll her living expense as well as finding a school for her education if necessary; however she has to tell me honestly where she is now career-wise before I can provide any meaningful help, instead of showering money on her and risking turning her into a favorite client for the local drug kingpin.

  335. Nicegirl says:

    haha – Yes, just like that!… Oh and by the way can you show me your valid student ID please? sweetly smiling…

  336. Jacob says:

    While we are waiting for the salad course, dear, could you take this test kit to the bathroom, then by the time we are done with the main course, we will have the scientific input to help us decide what we shall have for desert or whether we will have a second date. LOL.

  337. Kms2014 says:

    Certain people can carry the HIV for ten years with no symptoms…dated an epidemiologist one time, and he told me this, but the fact he worked with HIV positive people all the time kind of freaked me out a bit….and some people can never get the virus, due to mutation of CCR5-delta32. This is what saved certain people from plague a long time ago, in regards too the theory that certain strains were viral and not all bacterial. Is a good mutation, if you have it….

  338. Nicegirl says:

    @Jacob.. you should require the testing before the “valid current student ID” ;o)

  339. Nicegirl says:

    KMS… we all need to know right? Now I want to read through and see how this topic arose. Safe sex is the only way to be in this type of relationship. Even after you have a level of trust I am not sure you can completely trust that your partner is not sleeping around with others.

  340. Jacob says:

    There are rapid HIV test now. I’m considering requiring that along with 10-panel drug test, as well as valid current student ID, on first date.

  341. Kms2014 says:

    The guy gave* her an STD…for her de-virgination gift ):

  342. Kms2014 says:

    @Jacob..Well, like much in life, it depends and life isn’t fair. Many people choose to bury their heads about STDs in the sand. Had a friend from years ago…she waited a very long time for sex, was in her 20’s. The first time she had sex…guess what? Yep, the guy have her an STD. Kind of like the girl who got pregnant the first time she had sexy then, there are the men and women who lead very high risk lifestyles who seem to come out of it unscathed(or, they just are asymptomatic 😉

    Sorry for the std lesson, nicegirl..the teacher in me came out today, hehe 😉 Is true, though…most people just kinda lie to themselves about the risks. Is only human.

  343. Jacob says:

    @RSD
    Yes, beauty vs. sexual skills and reliability are often inversely correlated . . . just because the pretty ones didn’t have to be skillful or punctual. However, it is only a statistical distribution. It is the statistical outliers (beautiful, skillful and reliable) that deserve your time and generosity.

  344. Josh says:

    @Russian SB

    The problem isn’t that women can’t. The problem is they don’t. Big difference.

    Arrange for some vodka as I will share some deep thoughts on this specific topic soon. 😉

  345. gentle(man)soul says:

    STD testing:

    KMS is right,nothing beats the proper testing and many dangerous infections can’t be seen ,smelled,or tasted . (HIV for one )

    But practically for most Sugar interactions , at least do the above . How many potential partners do the exchange of a comprehensive Testing results ? Not many .

  346. Jacob says:

    Interesting chapters on HPV. Two homework questions:

    1. Based on what you have read in the chapters, if you meet a 27yo virgin, should you recommend her/him take HPV vaccination?

    2. Based on what you have read in the chapters, if you are older than 26 and is sexually active, do you need to worry about HPV at all?

    hint for question #2: since you are presumed to be vaccinated already due to either having had the vaccine or having been exposed to it therefore immune from it (assuming the vaccine theory itself is functional at all for HPV; if HPV is like the flu with rapid mutation and numerous strains then vaccination would hardly work at all and merely a false sense of security).

  347. Russian SB says:

    God, I miss that blog !

  348. Russian SB says:

    Gentle(man)soul
    Skip the text , better ask her medical one !

  349. Nicegirl says:

    I didn’t read through this thread but there is an awful lot of details on STD’s… Yikes!

  350. Nicegirl says:

    This is a bit of a one sided topic. Not all SD’s are married and if they are it should be common sense to be discrete and watch the times and # of texts. I would have liked to have seen this be a more varied SD not only focused on marriage… Even singles want privacy.

  351. Kms2014 says:

    @NC…SA usually puts up an article on party with pictures/videos or other journalists who attended sometimes do…the other journalists, not from SA, often have an interesting take on things, though.

  352. NC Gent says:

    hear* anything about the pary

  353. Kms2014 says:

    Genital Herpes – CDC Fact Sheet
    Herpes is a common sexually transmitted disease (STD) that any sexually active person can get. Most people with the virus don’t have symptoms. It is important to know that even without signs of the disease, it can still spread to sexual partners.
    Basic Fact Sheet | Detailed Version
    Basic fact sheets are presented in plain language for individuals with general questions about sexually transmitted diseases.

    What is genital herpes?
    Genital herpes is an STD caused by two types of viruses. The viruses are called herpes simplex type 1 and herpes simplex type 2.
    How common is genital herpes?
    Genital herpes is common in the United States. In the United States, about one out of every six people aged 14 to 49 years have genital herpes.
    How is genital herpes spread?
    You can get herpes by having vaginal, anal, or oral sex with someone who has the disease.
    Fluids found in a herpes sore carry the virus, and contact with those fluids can cause infection. You can also get herpes from an infected sex partner who does not have a visible sore or who may not know he or she is infected because the virus can be released through your skin and spread the infection to your sex partner(s).
    How can I reduce my risk of getting herpes?
    The only way to avoid STDs is to not have vaginal, anal, or oral sex.
    If you are sexually active, you can do the following things to lower your chances of getting herpes:
    Being in a long-term mutually monogamous relationship with a partner who has been tested and has negative STD test results;
    Using latex condoms the right way every time you have sex.
    Herpes symptoms can occur in both male and female genital areas that are covered by a latex condom. However, outbreaks can also occur in areas that are not covered by a condom so condoms may not fully protect you from getting herpes.

  354. Kms2014 says:

    All boys and girls ages 11 or 12 years should get vaccinated.
    Catch-up vaccines are recommended for males through age 21 and for females through age 26, if they did not get vaccinated when they were younger.
    The vaccine is also recommended for gay and bisexual men (or any man who has sex with a man) through age 26. It is also recommended for men and women with compromised immune systems (including people living with HIV/AIDS) through age 26, if they did not get fully vaccinated when they were younger.

    Notice** they won’t usually vaccinate someone over 26 because they have already been exposed

    How common is HPV and the health problems caused by HPV?
    HPV (the virus): About 79 million Americans are currently infected with HPV. About 14 million people become newly infected each year. HPV is so common that most sexually-active men and women will get at least one type of HPV at some point in their lives.
    Health problems related to HPV include genital warts and cervical cancer.
    Genital warts: About 360,000 people in the United States get genital warts each year.
    Cervical cancer: More than 10,000 women in the United States get cervical cancer each year.
    There are other conditions and cancers caused by HPV that occur in persons living in the United States.

  355. Kms2014 says:

    Condescending*

  356. Kms2014 says:

    Shall we go back to sex Ed. 101….

    Fact–someone can be a carrier if certain STDs yet show no visible symptoms. Can they infect you still? Yes, they can. You can not look at someone and tell whether or not they are a carrier. And, even during certain infectious phases, all the symptoms might not be obvious.

    Most women are already exposed to HPV by their 20’s. There are many different strains.

    You can do the looky loo test, and yes, obviously if someone has a raging oozing fever blister on their lips, then do not kiss, hehe…However, ask your doctor if that is 100% or even 50% telling of who does not, or who might have an STD, and his/her response will most likely be a condemn sending chuckle.

  357. NC Gent says:

    I have had quite a bit of incredibly good sex with SBs. Not sure why others are having issues.

    Anybody here anything about the SA party last night? Any police this time?

  358. RSD says:

    @flyr, it seems like our experiences are very different. Even when I have offered oral stimulation to GFs and trusted SBs in the past, the vast majority had no interest. Same with me, I have very little interest in oral sex being performed on me.

    Also with all the effort you place into pleasing your woman, you may end up with more fakers. Just saying…

  359. Russian SB says:

    Only man know how to deliver pleasure to another man :))))))

  360. flyR says:

    “I should add that in my experience women are even worse at giving blowjobs than they are at sex. And that’s pretty bad.”

    or

    for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap

  361. RSD says:

    Trust me I avoid risky demographic groups also but my concern isn’t solely HIV. I don’t exactly want my wife asking me how she got chlamydia either.

  362. flyR says:

    I leave the house to drive to the airport and I am surrounded by gaggle of genetically flawed humanoids,disguised as everyday drivers, seeking to maim or kill me. We preflight airplanes to make sure the mechanics have remembered to attach the wings and no important parts have fallen off on the prior flight. Arriving in Oakland the real risk manifests itself in the form of San Francisco drivers, 110% of whom have failed driving school. The lesson is that life is full of risks. Good judgement mitigates risk.

    So too with sugar. If I screen for less than a handful of behavioral characteristics I’ll eliminate about 97% of the risk my partner carries aids and a large percentage of the risk of other STD’s. If I apply a couple more screens I am probably up to 99%. Yes it is politically incorrect to discriminate and thus thousands are sacrificed to the lie.

    Sadly the public has been brainwashed into believing that aids is spread across the population like peanutbutter on wholewheat bread.

    I share the same health concerns but realize that the first line of defense is discretion.

  363. RSD says:

    I should add that in my experience women are even worse at giving blowjobs than they are at sex. And that’s pretty bad.

  364. RSD says:

    @flyr, the same SB I used my tongue on gave me a blowjob as well. I realized the risks involved and since then have not allowed any SB to perform oral sex on me either. I suppose with a condom it would be safe but rather pointless.

  365. Josh says:

    That was not a question ygbkm. That was an ass-u-mption made by gradpa flyR. 😉

  366. flyR says:

    “””I got pressured to use my tongue with an SB once a while back. I wouldn’t take the risk again unless I was certain the SB is disease-free. At a minimum, she would need to have a normal Pap smear, gonorrhea and chlamydia assays, HIV, hep C, RPR (for syphilis), and herpes simplex type 2 serology. Plus I would want to be reasonably certain she isn’t sleeping with anyone else. SBs might not like it, but it’s the price they’d pay for having a completely clean partner in return.”””

    I assume being a caring and responsible partner you insist she take the precautions before she applies her tongue to you

  367. Alexis says:

    “Really, Alexis? You have sex so soon with your virgin SDs? Hehe”

    No, that was pertaining to SBs. Did you want me to save one of those for you too?

    Dang, just like a woman… taking all my stuff lol.

    @Elle
    Good hun! I’m glad for you. :)

  368. RSD says:

    I got pressured to use my tongue with an SB once a while back. I wouldn’t take the risk again unless I was certain the SB is disease-free. At a minimum, she would need to have a normal Pap smear, gonorrhea and chlamydia assays, HIV, hep C, RPR (for syphilis), and herpes simplex type 2 serology. Plus I would want to be reasonably certain she isn’t sleeping with anyone else. SBs might not like it, but it’s the price they’d pay for having a completely clean partner in return.

  369. Josh says:

    “Tongue Foo Master”

    Good one. 😉

    I have read that many of you use the tongue with your SBs. I must ask, aren’t you guys worried about STDs at all?

    And/or what are you doing to reduce/prevent getting infected?

  370. Analog Kid says:

    “Now, this is how a not-so-idiot and/or not-so-carefree man reads the pitch:

    “Although people call me good looking I am up to yet another attempt on OMG-the-best-look-eva. I would like to find an idiot to bankroll my latest futile attempt.

    I will pretend to be all yours of course and you could create me the way you want as long as I want the same. You will decide shape, size, hair color, etc., exactly as I tell you how you would have like.”

    Don’t forget to add: “NSA”

  371. Josh says:

    “Very good looking but, it’s time for a make-over. I would like to find a Daddy who doesn’t mind creating his own baby. I would be all yours of course and you could create me the way you want. shape, size, hair color,etc.”

    Only an idiot or carefree man will go for sales pitch above. Yes, there are men who are super carefree and my hats off to them.

    Now, this is how a not-so-idiot and/or not-so-carefree man reads the pitch:

    “Although people call me good looking I am up to yet another attempt on OMG-the-best-look-eva. I would like to find an idiot to bankroll my lastest futile attempt.

    I will pretend to be all yours of course and you could create me the way you want as long as I want the same. You will decide shape, size, hair color, etc., exactly as I tell you how you would have like.”

  372. gentle(man)soul says:

    @Chicago

    .” What irks me is that if they want to eventually get it on….they can’t pay got hotel room or rather don’t want too. How else do they think it will work?”

    This falls into the category of helping your Daddy help you .Regrettably most SDs aren’t the “money is no object ” types,as much as you would like to believe the Marketing . I look for a Baby with 1) a car and 2) an apartment -preferably no roommates (unless they want to play too !)because of privacy and cost . I would rather give more money to my SB rather than spend it on a hotel .

    Analog Kid says:

    an invite to meet the Tongue Foo Master

    Good one AK ! I’m sure a Tongue Foo Master could lick anybody !

  373. SouthernSB says:

    @flyR-Right and it isn’t that I don’t want to get into shape, in fact I have a Daddy who is paying for me to go the gym right now. But I’m doing it because I want to do it, not because he told me to. It’s wonderful that he would go into his pocket and pay for me to get into better shape because it’s important to me and in the end it’s a win for him too because I end up looking better when we go out together.

  374. flyR says:

    @southern – great analysis…….. you would be repulsed by anyone who would find the profile appealing.

    I think SA contributes to the beauty/youth worship culture while the real opportunity for sustained sugar lies in reasonably attractive, wonderfully sensual, NICE and intelligent with character.

    Yes there are the Donald Sterlings of the world who will empty their wallets ( but now wifey wants her share back) but they are the .005%. You have to love Sterling’s wife who just hit a $1 billion windfall on the clippers sale, but still wants the girlfirend to return all her gifts. Poor girlfiend looses the gifts, has massive legal fees and looks like what she is.

  375. Josh says:

    “an apartment in Malibu ( they were cheap then)”

    Now I know that flyR and Donald Sterling are in the same age group.

  376. SouthernSB says:

    flyR says:
    September 18, 2014 at 7:19 am

    From another LA profile

    “Very good looking but, it’s time for a make-over. I would like to find a Daddy who doesn’t mind creating his own baby. I would be all yours of course and you could create me the way you want. shape, size, hair color,etc.”

    I was seriously thinking of setting up my profile like that because I am not the fittest woman in the bunch. I was going to market myself as a “SB project” and let the SD make me in his imagine of his perfect girl, let him whip me into shape and change my hair and dress me, all of that. But I really thought about it and realized that I would probably get two kinds of Daddies that way; the one’s that wouldn’t allow me to even have an opinion of my own and have no freedom at all, and the dominate guys who would want me to be their slaves. Either way, when I really thought it through, I knew I couldn’t be happy with the control freak I would have been turning myself over to.

  377. flyR says:

    “”With discretion, I too can’t bring them over to my place as I have roommates. What irks me is that if they want to eventually get it on….they can’t pay got hotel room or rather don’t want too. How else do they think it will work?””

    Perhaps a new opportunity here, a collection of fully furnished, discrete apartments available to the sugar community on a nightly basis. Perhaps rented by a small group of SB’s. From years of too much time on the road I hate hotel rooms unless there is a beach or river out the door. My guess is that there are also a lot of married SD’s who feel the same way.

    For the SB I think it is very awkward to walk in the door and then walk out without having sex so it’s important to meet first or to feel comfortable enough with your SA (situational awareness)

    When I was in undergrad one of my good friends had an apartment in Malibu ( they were cheap then) paid for by a woman who got to use it a couple afternoons a week.

    The answer of course is for the real SD to include enough of an allowance to allow the SB to have her own apartment.

    The sad Ray Rice saga is a reminder that most every step you take in a major hotel is observed and captured.

  378. flyR says:

    @Chicago Baby – That’s an issue with many married guys-the hotel vs back to the home or apartment. It also adds significantly to their cost of sugar; irrelevant to some, significant to many.

  379. flyR says:

    From another LA profile

    “Very good looking but, it’s time for a make-over. I would like to find a Daddy who doesn’t mind creating his own baby. I would be all yours of course and you could create me the way you want. shape, size, hair color,etc.”

    Donald Sterling , Donald Sterling please report to the sugar room

    I imagine there are SD’s looking for an opportunity like that but urghhhhhhhh bleeeh . So sick and so sad/

    I guess that makes me a natural, unadulterated food addict

  380. ChicagoBaby says:

    I’ve noticed the SD are a bit cheaper and cautious. Unfortunately a lot of the non-confident SB ruined it for the good ones.

    With discretion, I too can’t bring them over to my place as I have roommates. What irks me is that if they want to eventually get it on….they can’t pay got hotel room or rather don’t want too. How else do they think it will work?

    I prefer men who travel to my city who are in town for business and have already a room booked so no worries there, a plus it speeds up the funding, and sexual stuff for him. Win -win.

  381. Beach_Girl says:

    Analog~ It’s great to get all the bullcrap out of the way, that is one reason I enjoy sugar so much. It’s mostly Drama free and you are expected to be upfront and honest 😀

  382. Beach_Girl says:

    Flyr~ lol crowdfunder lol… Yes, it is empowering to some, but others can’t take the rejections and other things that happen here. (being compared, judged on your appearance) I’ve enjoyed sugar, I hope to have another SD, looking but not committed fully at this time. It’s great to have someone help out with goals and dreams, but not all SDs are like that

    Russian~ No the Dr. says i’m ok… in need of a little TLC 😀
    Nice to see you back. I haven’t been on, I don’t have time to spend here, unfortunately! but it’s always fun to come back and chat with all of you.

  383. Analog Kid says:

    One more thing ……..I cannot tell you how pleasing it is to meet a SB for the first time and have all of the BS out of the way. There’s no dancing around ……. it’s simply a matter of at that point …… does she receive an invite to meet the Tongue Foo Master or not.

  384. Analog Kid says:

    @ Gentle-Man “How do you feel about an attractive and appealing Pot SD (from the profile) desiring private time with only you as the arrangement ? He needs discretion and is up front about the deal involving only the time spent behind closed doors .

    My arrangements involve only that now ,and my SBs have been happy with and look forward to the activities . They are not Pros , but just college girls who love sex and need some extra money . This is relevant to the topic because many SDs can not date in public and go through the M&G ritual . A large number of men fall into this category and not to consider this option reduces your choices .”

    Here ! Here ! I find probably 75% of the SB’s I am in contact with are more than happy with this arrangement. I used to be a bit reserved bringing up this scenario of P4P, zero social meetings and “donation” talk and left this discussion for the first M&G. This of course was before I realized the number of women looking for the exact same thing as me. Now it all gets spelled out very early in the first few e-mail exchanges…. and like I said 75% are all in.

  385. Russian SB says:

    Beach_Girl, living goddess ! I am back, heard, you are not here last time, are we loosing you ?
    Doctor, we loosing her !..

  386. Russian SB says:

    It is so exiting !

  387. Russian SB says:

    flyR, froud, thieving, embezzlement – my new favorite English words, my compang into Commercial court now. In fact, I going to have coffee, and heading to court too !

  388. Russian SB says:

    Is she young and hot ?

  389. Russian SB says:

    Josh, how do you know that your collegue sign up recently ? By photo ?

  390. Russian SB says:

    So, again, girls, should we share time wasters list, who take us to upscale restaurants – to teach us how to live ?
    I think we should !

  391. Russian SB says:

    Josh, I am back into sugar, from traditional relationship.
    Fancy – naked chest guys :)
    I never respond to such category, in sugar world six packs mean substantional allowance $, and NOT boys distortion on chest.
    I prefer ” extra few pounds ” boys.

  392. Fancy says:

    Just a little off topic but don’t know where else to ask, what is with all the guys posting pictures of their naked chests? Do women tell men that they really like to look at that?

    Sorry guys, if I can’t post a picture of my delicious feet, then you should not be able to share your naked chest with us.

  393. flyR says:

    @ Beachgirl –

    I think sugar is incredibly empowering for the woman because it takes a lot of the embezzlement aspect out of dating.

    No more of the “of course I lay awake late into the night worrying about Global Warming, social justice and the slaughter of innocent cows. And yes I know we are a nation of evil , war mongering old white guys.” Ummmmmmm yes that feels good a little lower……

  394. flyR says:

    @BG”Southern~ sadly a lot of SBs aren’t comfortable in their skin… a lot of women as well. It’s sad. We all have something to offer in our own way. More women need to empower themselves.”

    Two of the manifestations –

    a) I would never have slept with him if I had not consumed so much tequila.

    b. I was committed to ending the relationship before he invited me to go skiing for the week at Vail. I thought I “owed” him another chance

    Sugar forces us to introduce things of specific value into the relationship. Harder to blame the tequila or your generosity in giving him another chance.

    I do think that to the extent it is treated as an investment both parties probably benefit. I’m investing in an extraordinarily effective productivity increasing opportunity and also performing the socially responsible function of helping someone pursue their dream. Call it party of one smiling crowdfunder without the crowd.

  395. Josh says:

    One girl from work just signed up on SA. I am glad that my profile photo is hidden. 😉

  396. Beach_Girl says:

    KMS~ i’ve been working and living life 😀 i’ve been good. I am always on and off here… not consistent at all, but it’s nice to come and chat with my Sugar Friends once in a while, you can always mail me. Miss Montreal 1 at gmail

    Russian~ It’s been a while, how are things there, hope you are safe!

  397. Josh says:

    Hello Russian

    Where have you been sweetheart?

  398. Josh says:

    @Kirsten

    Shhhhh, let me clue you in. Step over to your email marketing guys and ask them to send this message to the chicks who are already going to the party. 😉

  399. Kirsten says:

    Hi guys, I have a Sugar Baby going to the LA Rouge Party who is not from the area and is looking to connect with another SB beforehand. She wants a girlfriend who she can attend the party with. If anyone is interested in getting her contact info, please let me know. Thanks!

  400. Josh says:

    Dang…those gorgeous melons…

  401. Josh says:

    Just took off from the second date where the coed, single mom, changed here mind about going to hotel, hut still wanted to get paid for the meeting. Whaaaat! No can do sweetheart…

    I split after 5 minutes into the date, “let’s schedule something when you’re ready, ok dear, you look gorgeous.” 😉

  402. Josh says:

    @Kms2014

    “She was Iron Lady”

    Did she have “man hands” a la Seinfeld?

  403. Russian SB says:

    God, I miss that ! Talking about black and white list, we should create list of men, who want us to go back into traditional dating pool. So-called, ” missioneirs of holy traditional dating “. I, personally, don’t mind to dine in upscale restaurant in exchange of some preaching man company. But I want to know what I sighn up to, before the dinner, not after salad :)

  404. Russian SB says:

    Meet the nicest and cutest londoner from SA. And what do you think he start discuss before a main course ?? That arrangement is a prostitu…n, and being in arrangements all the time ( me ) will make impossible for me to build normal relationship in future etc.
    I answered that this IS normal relationship for me.
    PS. Guys, if you have such things in your mind, at least, wait untill dessert, pleeaaase :)

  405. Russian SB says:

    Hello , sugars !!! We are having cold war again – can you imagine that ?

    Few times I have been adressed in hotels like a dother of my sugardaddy. Simply dressed and without makeup I look quite innocent. It is nice cover. But in muslim countries, including Maldives, you declare as a married couple, or they not book you a room in hotel. And, I must say, most of the time sugardaddy broking that legend – they want to kiss or cuddle on public , show their affection to shock people. And all that, after emphatising, how important for them to be discreet :)

  406. Kms2014 says:

    Hi Beachgirl (: Am doing well, and you? Where have you been, lately? Missed you here…

  407. Beach_Girl says:

    Southern~ sadly a lot of SBs aren’t comfortable in their skin… a lot of women as well. It’s sad. We all have something to offer in our own way. More women need to empower themselves.

    Gentle~They do say the truth is stranger than fiction!!!! lol, poor girl!
    I’m not sure you would do well with someone like that!

    Josh~ lol, WHAT!!!! i’m not doing a SD a favor by sleeping with him lol jk… you are funny at times 😉

    KMS~ hey girl, how have you been?

    Flyr~ Gentle~ Jacob~ I think 3rd date is max too, it has to click. It never happened for me on the first date… I think it’s a give and take process,communication has to be clear and no drama and bullcrap!

  408. flyR says:

    @westcoast Cutie – My sense is that a combination of stumbling economy, SA promotion and changing public acceptance of sugar has flooded the sugar bowl. I think it’s more an issue of quantity rather than quality.

    Re Sugar Schedule – sugar relationships are like sharks – if they are not moving ahead they are going to die. Meeting should happen within 10 days, preferably sooner. Ideally you come to the first meeting with an understanding of the range of an agreeable arrangement, pretty good idea of sensual expectations and limits and if there is compatibility . Preference is to have the first meet not too far from my place in case we decide to proceed , otherwise second meeting or in rare cases third meet.

  409. Kms2014 says:

    “You connect the pelvis to the ATM and a relationship can grow .”

    What poetic words…you are the Pushkin of our own little blog, :-p

  410. gentle(man)soul says:

    @Alexis

    “no time for BS on either side”

    Good attitude ! You probably have great success with Sugaring . You get “it” and you move on ahead . Most SBs could learn a thing or two by your can do attitude. You connect the pelvis to the ATM and a relationship can grow .

  411. Elle says:

    @Alexis > Well good things can take time. I know that with wine. :)

  412. Kms2014 says:

    No again for virgin SDs…the first time for them 😉

  413. Josh says:

    @Kms2014

    “Really, Alexis? You have sex so soon with your virgin SDs? Hehe”

    There we go again. :(

  414. Kms2014 says:

    She was Iron Lady

  415. Kms2014 says:

    Really, Alexis? You have sex so soon with your virgin SDs? Hehe

  416. Alexis says:

    “If the pot SD/SM can not meet (and pay for the logistics of meeting if any) within 2-3 weeks of initial contact, he/she deserves to be nexted because he/she is likely to be a time-waster/picture-collector.”

    Forget anything close to 3 weeks. That’s way too much time. I have a 1-week rule and so far it’s working excellently for me. I MIGHT (stressing might, very stressing) extend to 1.5 if I have some type of proof of his inability to meet but any longer than that, forget it.

    “If the pot SB does not consent to intimacy by 2nd or 3rd date, she/he deserves to be nexted simply because she/he is likely to be a time-waster/rinser.”

    That’s a good guideline although I’ve always kept a 1-date rule myself. I usually have most of the arrangement worked out before even meeting though so everything’s neat and tidy.

    “In my view, sugaring is a form of accelerated dating…”

    In mine too, hence why no time for BS on either side.

  417. Josh says:

    Was Thatcher a man or a woman?

  418. Elaine says:

    Wahaha Southern, funny and so true!

    It is the same kind of SBs that is mentioning in their profile how intelligent or classy they are.
    If you really are, no need to say it; it shows in the way you write and present yourself, and not to forget, your pictures!

    Like Margaret Thatcher said:
    “It is like being a lady… if you have to tell people you are, you aren’t”

  419. Josh says:

    Good one SouthernSB. 😉

  420. SouthernSB says:

    Josh says:
    September 17, 2014 at 10:40 am

    “@gentle(man)soul
    @Beach

    Gentle~ lol is that a real profile or did you just make it up? 😀

    You can’t make this stuff up ( :”

    The problem with these women is that they ddon’t understand the difference between volunteering and job.

    When you volunteer, you can be a lot more selective as to what you will do and what you won’t.

    But when you apply for a job, you need to be diplomatic and willing to put up with a lot.

    Also, most of these women think that they are doing the SDs a favor. And hence the condescending tone.

    What I think the problem is is that a lot of these women are not comfortable in their skin and they have no confidence at all. If they did they wouldn’t be writing these profiles that scream, “I’m not a hooker, there is absolutely, positively no way I am a prostitute and I am letting my mother read this just to prove I am not a prostitute!!” while asking for 5K am month.

  421. Josh says:

    “@gentle(man)soul
    @Beach

    Gentle~ lol is that a real profile or did you just make it up? 😀

    You can’t make this stuff up ( :”

    The problem with these women is that they ddon’t understand the difference between volunteering and job.

    When you volunteer, you can be a lot more selective as to what you will do and what you won’t.

    But when you apply for a job, you need to be diplomatic and willing to put up with a lot.

    Also, most of these women think that they are doing the SDs a favor. And hence the condescending tone.

  422. gentle(man)soul says:

    @Beach

    Gentle~ lol is that a real profile or did you just make it up? 😀

    You can’t make this stuff up ( : Sadly, the caretaker in me wanted to reach out to her but I resisted the impulse somehow . She has been damaged . A little Gentle love might make things all right. But then again I probably represent the kind of guy she resents

    @Jacob

    Right on ! 1)meet within 3 weeks 2)sex within 3 dates The 3 and 3 rule . I prefer the 1/1 rule myself, but 3/3 is the max.

  423. Josh says:

    “If you had to read my profile twice because it confused you the first time, please hit the back button and proceed on.”

    I’d LUV to meet this LOVELY lady but I have been obsessively hitting the back button for that past hour. 😉

  424. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars!

    ~ Jacob~ I agree that meeting should be done quickly and that intimacy should be on the 3rd date, but I think that it can’t be rushed as well. If one person isn’t comfortable with jumping into bed right away, it should be discussed.

    Gentle~ lol is that a real profile or did you just make it up? 😀

  425. Elaine says:

    ps. “YOU” of course only if not accompanied with “NOT” in the same sentence! 😉

  426. Elaine says:

    “I/ME” alert!!
    Just count how many “I/ME “‘s and you know enough, even without reading very well..
    (Pick up the ones with a lot of “YOU’s!)

    And then they come here complaining they can’t find an SD 😉

  427. gentle(man)soul says:

    Here’s an uplifting Profile : Josh ,this has got your name all over it
    Let me begin by saying I am not desperate or having difficulty finding offers in my daily life. So don’t insult me by assuming that because I have a profile on this type of site, that if you just are not my type and I don’t want to meet you that I am somehow playing games. Furthermore, don’t bother messeging me if you don’t have the guts to meet in person. I am too busy to waste my time being stood up.

    I am a well educated woman who has many interests and is extremely well rounded. I am very successful, despite the hard life I was dealt. However, I have tired of trying to make relationships work with men who don’t appreciate my devotion and attentions, when they probably didn’t deserve them in the first place. I am a very busy woman, and I don’t have time for games or silliness, so in the free time I do have I would like to have someone of equal intelligence and class to spend a relaxing time with. I have a lot going for me, and would like to find someone who appreciates that and has something to offer in return.

    And then ;
    I don’t need drama or craziness, –. I am NOT looking for one night stands or short term affairs; —just another chick in your black book of travel hook ups.

    You should probably be at least a college graduate, preferably masters; your chances are better if you have a PhD or similar. If you don’t know what a matriculate means, you are probably way below my level. If you had to read my profile twice because it confused you the first time, please hit the back button and proceed on.

    If you have ever been treated for psychiatric disorders, stay away. I have enough crazy people in my life, thank you.

    Don’t contact me for just cyber. I am not interested.

    Also, please know that I am not a total idiot, so certain details will be confirmable or it’s not happening. Thanks.

    Well ,that about covers it ! That inbox is going to be filling up. I wonder if she could be my sex buddy ? Oops ,the psychiatric requirement —– Naaah !

  428. Jacob says:

    In my view, sugaring is a form of accelerated dating: the men get to sex quicker, and the women get to tapped into the men’s wallet quicker (instead of having to wait till married and have joint accounts). Discreteness is a virtue in any relationship that is not marriage or exclusive LTR; however, if one really has to hide the dalliances from someone else, well, that’s just asking for trouble in the long run. It’s far better to deal with any potential fall-out pro-active before they happen instead of trying one’s luck and hoping for the best.

  429. Jacob says:

    So a fair guideline for both sides is:

    1. If the pot SD/SM can not meet (and pay for the logistics of meeting if any) within 2-3 weeks of initial contact, he/she deserves to be nexted because he/she is likely to be a time-waster/picture-collector.

    2. If the pot SB does not consent to intimacy by 2nd or 3rd date, she/he deserves to be nexted simply because she/he is likely to be a time-waster/rinser.

    Sounds fair enough. No, I’m not advocating one-night-stands, but a thousand mile journey starts with the first step. If the SD/SM doesn’t want to meet quickly or the SB is not interested in getting the arrangement started then build a potentially medium term to long term relationship from there, you the counter-party is likely to be wasting a lot of you time on a sub-par prospect.

  430. Alexis says:

    @westcoastcutie

    “I clearly state on my profile that I do not have to be on the site and am perfectly capable of talking with men and going on dates – but I want a relationship that is out of the ordinary.”

    Shut this open window. It’s letting in a draft. 😉

    @Ria

    “I get this is a sugar-daddy site, but the least you could do is treat half your client base with the same level of respect you’d give your cashier.”

    Huh?
    Is this saying that SA should treat SBs the same as SDs/SMs? Why? At least 97/98% of them are not paying customers.

    As a SB I’m just grateful for the free account. It’s pretty wild being able to do all this for free.

    @gentle(man)soul
    I dunno about the blog girls but most SBs I meet are more than fine with that type of arrangement. I always attributed that to my region though. Some want the whole “let’s go to the movies/shopping/etc.” junk but most are just fine spending “alone” time.

    @Elle
    “Risk is everywhere, and seing each other only to find yourselves behind the walls of a hotel room is not what I have in mind when thinking about SD/SB relationship.”

    Then understand that your search is going to take longer.

  431. Kms2014 says:

    @Josh…it doesn’t take make much for certain ‘SD’s’, I reckon 😉 Yes, cannot afford(or, want to), seems to be their hurdle, or they just never truly intend to follow through, anyways, and enjoy their fantasy from the safety of their home computer. Strange…I know. But, not the many many variety of women ‘strange’, just strange strange.

    “It looks like one part of the enjoyment for the SD is to be seen with nice looking SB, so I am not too sure about the location selection. Risk is everywhere, and seing each other only to find yourselves behind the walls of a hotel room is not what I have in mind when thinking about SD/SB relationship.”

    @Elle…my experience has been with single and attached benefactors. In my experience, the only difference was that the gift/allowance transfer issue was not as big of a deal with the single men for obvious reasons. The attached gentlemen would always take me out on dates and on trips as well. And, if someone only wanted hotel liaisons, then would say, ‘thanks, but no thanks’. If was only after strictly hotel, then would do something else. Part of the fun is the real dating and doing things together…as well as the conversation when we are away, too, and being their soft shoulder to release their worries/cares to…as being a good listener and empathetic to them and their world, is probably the most valued thing I have done for them, in retrospect, or from what it seemed, anyway. But, am into the multidimensional, in all things of life.

  432. Josh says:

    I get it. So all they can (want to?) afford is an Internet connection, membership to SA and some slippery concoction. Hmmm 😉

  433. Kms2014 says:

    “Josh says:
    September 17, 2014 at 6:01 am
    I don’t really get the picture collection fetish.

    There are billions of photographs of absolutely gorgeous women. Why would SDs ask for SBs’ bathroom/minivan pictures to “collect” them?

    Unless of course their fetish is to collect bathroom selfies. Duh! ”

    I agree, but many freaks abound out there. The answer would be….Because they are having a lovely conversation(any interaction) with you, while looking(wanking) to your pictures. Ever heard of phone sex…or, men who want erotic chat/ cyber talk? They first get you to start sending pictures because they cannot afford to be an SD. Then, some move on to dirty chat/emails, all the while promising to meet ‘later’ or talk arrangements ‘later’. Encountered many here and there, on SA, but especially when I was new–fell prey to one when first joined. Did not figure it out for awhile because was slow and naive…and like you, did not understand that. They exist and are horrible people and terrible time wasters. They just are lonely guys who cannot afford to be the real thing, so settle for creepy picture collection wanking.

  434. Josh says:

    “It looks like one part of the enjoyment for the SD is to be seen with nice looking SB”

    That’s more of an SB wish than an SD’s desire. 😉

  435. Elle says:

    Well, I am a little skeptical at all these “key points”: would a high quality SD/SB relationship go on such ways that keeping these points in mind becomes mandatory ?
    My guess is that when in good company, one does not check constantly his/her phone or text messages and so on.
    Also, if the SB does not understand that with high position SD comes discretion on what he might tell, my guess is that the SD might have some higher expectations when he looks for a SB.
    Not ALL of the SD are married or involved in a love relationship… But if it is the case, I think that HE has to have in mind big stories and so on.
    It might be more complicated to try a story on people, rather than letting them feeling more embarrassed than you when they do not know what to think. Like if someone finds out you go on this Website: well okay then, why were you there in the first place? Why having to explain and justify yourself to each and everyone?
    It looks like one part of the enjoyment for the SD is to be seen with nice looking SB, so I am not too sure about the location selection. Risk is everywhere, and seing each other only to find yourselves behind the walls of a hotel room is not what I have in mind when thinking about SD/SB relationship.

  436. gentle(man)soul says:

    @girls

    How do you feel about an attractive and appealing Pot SD (from the profile) desiring private time with only you as the arrangement ? He needs discretion and is up front about the deal involving only the time spent behind closed doors .

    My arrangements involve only that now ,and my SBs have been happy with and look forward to the activities . They are not Pros , but just college girls who love sex and need some extra money . This is relevant to the topic because many SDs can not date in public and go through the M&G ritual . A large number of men fall into this category and not to consider this option reduces your choices .

    @Southern

    Sounds great ! Obviously you and ladies interested in the social events with a companion would not be up for a “private” Daddy .

    Lets’ have a show of hands who would be OK with this scenario .

  437. Josh says:

    The reason you think SBs dont get “respect” is that there are a couple of very opinionated ( clearing throat 😉 ) SDs who lurk around here.

    It used to be diametrically opposite a few months back when SBs contolled the blog and SDs only spoke when spoken to.

    You can ask flyR. He only spoke when spoken to. LOL!

  438. Josh says:

    *There are billions of photographs of absolutely gorgeous women on the Internet.

  439. Josh says:

    I don’t really get the picture collection fetish.

    There are billions of photographs of absolutely gorgeous women. Why would SDs ask for SBs’ bathroom/minivan pictures to “collect” them?

    Unless of course their fetish is to collect bathroom selfies. Duh! 😉

  440. westcoastcutie says:

    Hey everyone – I’ve been on the site for a little while now. Met a few people and had one long term SD for a while. Now that I’m back on the site, I haven’t been as lucky. My picture gets the SD to start talking to me, only to find out that they are looking for someone to spend their life with, to have fun with but to not give a monthly allowance. Its not like I bluntly say “Oh ya, don’t forget to give me an allowance” they straight up tell me that that is not their style. One guy asked me to book a flight myself – I asked him if it would be easier if he booked it, he said he would take care of everything else, when subtly asked about an allowance, he said it would feel weird giving money to someone to spend time with him… I clearly state on my profile that I do not have to be on the site and am perfectly capable of talking with men and going on dates – but I want a relationship that is out of the ordinary. I have debts from going to university that I would like taken care of. Are all the “SD’s” cheap now? (I’m not trying to offend anyone by writing this btw)! Just venting. Ugh! Haha.

    Oh and as a kicker – I think theres a couple “SD’s” on here that are here just to collect pictures of girls.

  441. flyR says:

    The kiss of death is when some programmer decides to change the settings as part of an update and the phone decides to display the first two lines of the text while sitting there on the charger.

    Does not “worry” me as I am not married or in a deep conventional relationshp but it is a little disconcerting to look over in a meeting and see that a very visible message has been displayed. Ipad is worst offender .

  442. Josh says:

    I don’t find this lying, making stuff up, etc., business all too appealing.

    As gentle says often, if married, keep it out of people’s sight.

  443. Josh says:

    @SubmissivelyYours

    “if I know that my SD’s workday starts at 10am, I won’t text him a minute before that because he could still be with his family.”

    I guess that would be an SD with 0 minutes drive time to work? working from home office maybe? Then the wife would never be too far off. 😉

  444. SubmissivelyYours says:

    It’s as simple as asking your Sugar Daddy when it’s okay to text him. For example, if I know that my SD’s workday starts at 10am, I won’t text him a minute before that because he could still be with his family.

    Also, you should know what kind of cell phone he has. A smart SB knows when to speak in code. If his phone has text message previews, the SB’s text shouldn’t say anything more than “Hey, Boss! Do you want me to mail that paperwork off for you, today?

    And if I’m ever seen in public with my SD, as far as the public is concerned, I’m his project manager or assistant. Always dress like you’re going to a business meeting, and keep a planner with you. Make it appear like your relationship is strictly business.

    A good sugar baby is also a good actress.

  445. Josh says:

    @flyR

    “where it gets complicated for both sides is when egos get involved.”

    Are you sure about that?

    I had thought that it gets “complicated” when the SD wants to do it at a price lower than what SB wants, and/or when SB does not want to put out even after receiving sugar from the SD.

  446. flyR says:

    @Southern – where it gets complicated for both sides is when egos get involved.

  447. flyR says:

    Goes both ways ….. If I am on a first meet with a younger SB in her territory I’ll often bring a file folder or brochure to give it more of an appearance of a business meeting. If a friend happens by she’s interviewing for a job or internship.

    I did discover that a 200 shades of gray SB profile belonged to the assistant of one of our best clients just as we were about to meet. Funny because she always looked so innocent in the office.

  448. SouthernSB says:

    Ugh, everybody here is making this much to complicated. I’m just doing this for the same reason I joined the Navy on a whim. Fun and profit. That’s this is for me…fun and profit. I don’t have some huge scheme to conquer the world or marry a CEO or steal some guy from his wife. I just want to go out, have a good time, get good roll between the sheets and get some help with my bills. Anything other than that is just cake. I’m not taking this seriously and I’m not looking for Prince Charming or a ticket to my own penthouse, although a new car would be nice, but be that as it may all I want is someone who has enough money and education to impress me, can take me to nice restaurants, can take me to the shows and the ballet once a year (I would only torture a man with the ballet one time a year) and doesn’t mind taking me to cheesy action adventure movies. That’s it, that’s all. Oh and of course a reasonable allowance would be nice too. Fun and profit…;)

  449. Josh says:

    @Freya

    “Communication” is women-speak for I-will-tell-and-you-will-obay. Men usually don’t give a shit because such “communication” only results in giving in to women’s dictates.

    A better key is respect. If you respect your man, you will do things you won’t otherwise. Respect needs to exist in the other direction as well.

  450. Jacob says:

    What if you find employees themselves?
    What if you find daughters of your past SB’s from decades ago? say, 20 years from now?

  451. RSD says:

    I think this is a decent blog topic. Both SDs and SBs may want discretion, but some don’t care, so this pertains to certain individuals. But everyone on here must understand that any person they meet from here may want discretion.

    Young Daddy, you’re right, I’ve been with SBs dressed as street-corner-whores; it’s very awkward. If the girl is dressed decently, I have tons of excuses that would work. I usually tell them how to dress, but to someone who normally dresses like that, they may not have any concept of appropriate attire.

    One topic that occasionally comes up with my employees who know about my sugar life is what I would do if I saw their daughters on here. A few weeks ago I gave them my final answer–that I would not tell them because discretion is essential, and I would respect their kids’ privacy over their desire as parents to know what trouble their kids are getting themselves into.

  452. Josh says:

    Dear Mr.Brandon

    Don’t you worry about the blog. The Sassy Blog Moderator got you covered. 😉

    Yours Truly

  453. Freya says:

    I found this to be very helpful. I believe communication is key in any relationship :) What to wear can be stressful. I think it’s a good idea to send your SD a picture of the outfit you are going to wear before hand if not have 3 outfits and let him choose so that he is comfortable in any situation.

  454. Josh says:

    Hmmm, are my posts being moderated now?

  455. Melissa says:

    Why do these articles always assume that the SD is the only one that requires discretion? As an SB, I also require discretion. I don’t want any of my friends and family to know what I do in my personal life because a lot of people are judgemental of the sugar world.

  456. Sierra says:

    Totally couldn’t agree more and also respecting each others personal space is crucial for all relationships in life.I think that keeping communication to a sane and reasonable limit and in a functional style is so helpful for all people.Great post !!!.
    Being an adult is a wonderful thing :)

  457. Young Daddy says:

    It also helps if the SB is dressed appropriately for public meetings. I have no problem being seen in public with a young attractive woman, and there are all sorts of cover stories one can come up with if I run into someone I know. But if I’m meeting someone who is dressed like, well, a woman of the night (particularly if it’s day time), it’s going to make me feel more than a little nervous.

  458. Alexis says:

    Hehe “word vomit”, I like that.

  459. gentle(man)soul says:

    @Joe

    Good for you if you are both happy with that lifestyle. Perhaps that is the best of all worlds .

  460. flyR says:

    Rule 1 – assume someone other than the addressee is reading the text

  461. Joe says:

    @gentle(man)soul “If a fact ,then both of you are unhappy and perhaps should consider moving on” Why must they be unhappy? My wife and I are happy together, we have no wish to be married to anyone else, and are best friends. The nature of love changes over time, and interest in sex with each other diminishes. It doesn’t mean we cannot have other friends of the opposite sex and sleep with them; it only means we remain committed to each other. A SB is perfect because the emotional involvement can be kept in check. Most SBs are not looking for marriage, so everything just works and everyone is happy with the nature of the relationships.

  462. gentle(man)soul says:

    Great sentiment ! This adds validity to the fact that most SDs and SBs desire secrecy . Not only cheating spouses need this (yes ,I’ve talked to many wives stepping out on their husbands here ) but most of my SBs do not want to be seen dating a father/grandfather figure.

    @Lawyer
    “My wife knows” I’ve used that one too. If a fact ,then both of you are unhappy and perhaps should consider moving on . I do believe that if you need polyamory then you should not marry at all . If already married you make the best of things . As a lawyer ? you know the incredible cost of divorce .

  463. Lawyer says:

    Another article full of one size fits all advice: many are not married or attached, and a growing number such as myself, have this apparently unique view that honesty is the best policy. My wife knows, and she is on here, too.

    I have yet to see an article offering advice that is actually practical in the real world: i.e., if you are male, NEVER put anything but the lowest numbers possible for income and assets, lest some lawyer bust you in a court of law in a divorce or other civil action.

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