4 years ago
3 Reasons Why “Sugar” is Sweeter than Marriage
  • Posted Sep 11, 2013

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Arrangements and marriages are polar opposites in terms of lifestyles. One is more open-minded and care-free, while the other is more traditional and monogamous. It’s like comparing apples to oranges. Or in this case, “Clooneys” to “Cruises.” So, which lifestyle is better? Well, to each his own. But here are some of the reasons why we think arrangements are the most ideal route:

 

From Platonic to Passionate

An arrangement is exactly that: arranged. You get exactly what you want in a partner, as well as how you would like the arrangement to unfold. Do you want to be friends for now and see if attraction grows? There’s an arrangement for that. Are you looking for a boyfriend now? There’s an arrangement for that. Is no-strings-attached your thing? You get the picture. Arrangements are meant to make everyone happy all steps of the way–unlike marriage, where many romances fizzle past the “honeymoon” stage.

 

Reasonable Expectations

Before the arrangement even begins, both people are involved in shaping their standards. This eliminates any expectations that are too high or too low. With marriage, meeting expectations can be burdensome because it is such an idealistic union. Some succeed, while others fail and part ways.

 

No “Till Death Do us Part”

With marriage, you’re in it for the long haul. And if not, they’ll probably leave with half. No relationships are ever perfect–they are meant to evolve and grow in both good and bad ways. But unlike an arrangement, marriage is contractual. People change, times change, and this can often result in the “D” word. Over half of marriages end in separation–why become a statistic? Try an arrangement first so you can truly measure compatibility minus any risk.

 

What are some other reasons why arrangements are more ideal than marriage?

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211 Responses to “3 Reasons Why “Sugar” is Sweeter than Marriage”

  1. D says:

    Marriage or arrangement? I think the question has no meaning. Marriage is an outdated institution that makes no happiness in life. It is doomed to extintion. We should be aware of this to accelerate the process. People should be free to decide what to do with their lives without external rules and without being judged. Marriage IS an arrangement, but one that is not choosed by people. That`s why the results are unhappiness and bitterness

  2. Anonymous says:

    Hi, I’m 34 year old black SB based in South Africa. I’m looking for 1 SD, a moderate allowance, shopping and gifts are a bonus. I have been registered here for a year but haven’t been actively looking since I’ve been very busy with my studies. I’m almost done with my degree now and have some free time to travel. My profile name is Zonnah.

    All the best to everyone XX

  3. edwin maine says:

    like to have fun and making love.

  4. Ben says:

    Did any woman here think in marriage?

    • I give up says:

      yep

      • emma says:

        I met someone on here, who was very successful and probably the nicest man I have ever met. But unfortunately, timing was off for us, I wanted to stay here in LA and get it all together before tying the Knott. Needless to say, he found someone and they got married and are very happy. So, I am holding out hope that when the time is right I will find him.

  5. Melissa says:

    I am a married lady who just found out my husband of 35 years is a SD.He has yet to admit this relationship and swears he has never in any shape or form did me wrong.He has always been that excullent ,loving caring person towards the family but now…….he does nothing but lies,sneaky…etc.Do you think he will be divorceing me or how long do their relationship usually last?
    E

    • SB Mel says:

      I think it entirely depends on YOU! Yes, you!!! Men are sugaradaddies not cuz they are bored but because THE WIFE LOST INTEREST IN SEX. This isn’t fair. They want sex and they WILL get it. This is the reality in probably 99 percent of the cases. Others just want “no strings” if single. Your hubby no doubt wants to keep you, his family and life pretty much in tact. The side thing means nothing to him, just sex. Give him sex and affection again and I’d be willing to bed he drops his SB. Just saying as a SB

    • Anonymous says:

      That’s very unfortunate. I’m sorry that you’re experiencing this Melissa!

      This is probably the reason why I’m a member of this site and have no desire for marriage, but I find that the number one thing that holds a relationship, long or short term, is communication. All pride aside, no accusation, just raw emotions poured out with an open heart.

      I can’t go on and assume what lead your husband to seek arrangements outside of your marriage.

      I do know that without communication, sex does become a problem. Personally, what I love about this site is that I’m free to make an arrangement that suits me comfortably, even comfort with sex. Because, despite what most people know (yes, even some women-probably because of lack of experience and something I’ve only recently learned myself), a lot of sex is not so nice to vaginas! Anything and everything, from infections to irritations, to being so sore you can’t sit comfortably without some itching or pain.

      I’m only seeing one single man and yes, I experience this. Can’t say I’ve ever had a real sex life before this either!

      We only meet once a week, sometimes twice, but in between it all, there are long, loving emails. Compliments, feedbacks even after an amazing night. Some nights (and this is because I can’t always put out) we just hang out in underwear and watch movies or tv shows. We’ll go out for walks, eat out, have a sleep over every blue moon.

      I’m sharing all this because I’m hoping to give you an idea of what you can try before throwing in the towel. Arrange date nights, surprise him a little. Reconnect. It doesn’t have to lead to sex and it doesn’t have to be spontaneous. I found having planned things gives me time that day to pamper myself and grow excited for the whole thing!

      Maybe you two can make an arrangement within your marriage!! Even if he doesn’t admit to having been a sugar daddy to someone else, tell him you checked out the site and it might be fun to apply it to your marriage. It’s open minded, you both get to talk openly about your desires and needs, which might lead to a new beginning and connection.

      At the end of it all, you’ll know you tried!

      Good luck!!!

    • Anonymous says:

      no he wont be divorcing you.. he will have a lot to lose and also to young lady want to marry an old man.. they just want companionship financial security and money.. i know its the harsh truth but honestly asking questions wont get you any real answers. just be the loving wife youve always been for your family and your man will be right back into your arms

    • D says:

      Melisa, maybe your husband doesn’t love you anymore. That’s not your fault. People live lifes that they don’t choose. That produces only unhappiness for both men and women.

  6. Candy says:

    The vast majority of the men I’ve dated from SA are just more honest and upfront about their expectations that men are on the ‘vanilla’ dating sites. withsomesugarontop.com

  7. seekinterests says:

    Why is an arrangement better than marriage? I wouldnt exactly know as I havent been married, but those I know who are married are not typically satisfied with their husbands and end up cheating on them for various reasons, mostly because they like the thrill of dating cute guys without looking at their dirty sinks in the morning.

    For me, I get bored easily. I think that is because the games men play are redundant. They reveal their insecurities, too many, too soon. I cannot find a sd I actually want to see longterm. I am mostly repulsed.

    • Fundude says:

      Im sure the feelings of repulsion are mutual.

      • ATLSD says:

        Fun dude she is right up your ally skinny, blonde. She is only a 5 hour drive away. Got your name written all over her.

    • noname says:

      then why are you on the site sugaring is not for everyone i don’t know you but if you don’t like men all the money in the world won’t make a difference you will feel disgust each time somone approaches you

    • noname says:

      to answer your question on why arrangements are better than marriage its because its more honest each side knows what to expect from the other side

    • Josh says:

      Sweetheart, know your worth and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. πŸ˜‰

    • D says:

      I have noticed that many women say that they get bored easily, and they say that as a virtue or as an exigence toward men to amused them. I think that should be an embarrasing trait of personality. Dude, if you get bored easily that`s because you are a boring, flat person… Don`t blame men about that! Find yourself two or three missions in life and you`ll never get bored again.

  8. 1 hot momma says:

    Marriage vs. Arrangements?
    I was once young, married to my High school sweetheart and very much in love. After 17 years and being very successful, he decided to go astray. My motto was and will forever be, ‘ Just tell me where I stand so I don’t fall.’ Instead, he hid ti from me and I had to find out through mutual friends. With arrangements, it is a more honest, open (or should be) relationship. Marriage is an arrangement, you are supposed to take the good, the bad and the ugly. With Sugar, you don’t have the latter two. It can be very liberating. My self personally, I wish I had done this earlier in life. I love to learn and the amount of experiences I have come across is enlightening.
    @onyx- my heart goes out to you… Seems like your babies need a refresher course in how to treat their Daddy right. Maybe some spanking needs to be involved, πŸ˜‰
    SBs, keep it real with the SDs, they are not to be disrespected or mistreated. It is not ALL about what you can get, it is about what you can give as well…..

    Profile #1759368 – pardon my particulars but I have and can make exceptions for the right SD. Good luck with sugaring….

  9. Exotic SB says:

    @onyx ~ I relocated for my last SD. When the arrangement ended I went back home. In the meantime he made sure I was secure with a home to go back to when it was over and actually assisted me in purchasing my house beforehand…I was very blessed to have such a thoughtful SD to look out for me like this! He wanted to make sure I never felt ‘stuck’. In the beginning I just went and spent some weekends. We had a GREAT time together. After a few months I stayed longer and longer until we decided I would ‘mostly’ relocate. I stayed in the penthouse at a hotel at first, and then at an executive suite as time went on. He was looking at purchasing a house for us but I had to re-evaluate my time being spent – I had never expected (nor drew any boundaries) and was very split in my family life/being a mom and in my sugar life, including/not including my daughter, etc. so many dynamics I wasn’t prepared for entering into something more ‘full time’. I would have preferred it stayed weekends and traveling to see my SD, but it got more serious than I signed up for I suppose with him being a single SD..we are still friendly now, it just ended up he was looking for a wife more than a SB…such a fine line we walk in the sugarbowl…

    I hope everyone’s Friday is phenomenally sweeeeet! xo

  10. NC Gent says:

    Hi DancingSB — I usually hide or delete my account when I am in a sugar relationship IF we have agreed to an exclusive arrangement. If not, it seems like it is open field. If you are using a free college SB account, I wouldn’t delete it because you can only use that email once.

    Sugar is fleeting at best…. go ahead and talk to the other SD, and I don’t think you need to tell him everything that is going on with your personal life. There are some risks though — maybe your current SD has made a fake profile to test you? I guess it all comes down to risk-reward and if you are willing to risk losing your current SD. It is hard to find a good SD, so be careful if you venture. Did your current SD take his account down? Ok lots of thoughts there… comes down to do what you think is best for you overall.

    You are welcome to attend a sugar meet of course – are you in the States? One doesn’t see whilst used here very often.

  11. Tommy says:

    Hi Any Married Guys out here. Any advise on how to keep things safe and manage time between family and SB. I work full time and family commitments are too high.

  12. dancingSB says:

    Hey @ Spicey, thanks for the earlier advice. Will do and keep you posted. Seems like you’re enjoying yourself in Bali! Good for you!

    I’m liking the idea of a blogger’s meet up btw.

    Oh, and if you blogger sugars don’t mind… *bats lashes*

    Here are a few more questions for you who are more SA experienced…

    When you’re in a sugar relationship, do you hide or deactivate your SA profile? If you don’t, how do you handle the traffic to your profile? Also, if there’s one SD in particular who is messaging you whilst your in a sugar relationship that you would be interested in knowing especially if things in your current relationship go south, should you reply to his messages? If so, what do you say? (Assuming ofcourse, ‘hey, would you like to be my standby sd?’ isn’t an option… :) Haha!)

    Thanks!

  13. DorkyGuy says:

    @Spicey~ You must be pretty remarkable if he has that much available to him for free locally, and he is flying you in from the US!

  14. SweetBaby says:

    Why not have both! I have an amazing loving husband who ia dedicated to me. But im bisexual and want a woman as well. Tried having a gf and having a “wifey” as well…didn’t work. I did not have the patience to deal with
    the ups and downs of 2 serious relationships.
    Now i am looking for a Sugar Mommy or friends
    with benefits. I love having the commitment that comes with a marriage and the excitement that comes with casual relationship.: -))

  15. Zack says:

    Ds..how many shades of blue do you remember?

  16. SugarySpicey says:

    I am here alone in Bali. I had a very nice dinner talking with a new friend who helped me weigh the pros and cons of my life.

    This place is like a p*ssy buffet, it’s insane. Average men with even just a little bit of game can have sex here with a new beautiful woman every night. It’s a good thing more American men don’t know about this place it’s an insane scene. For men on the prowl, it’s like shooting fish in a barrel.

  17. flyR says:

    @dorky “The Secret Service should set up a top secret escort service that is free to all elected officials.” I think they did it some time ago. The “escorts” are us citizens.

  18. sweetie says:

    NC, I think Durlabh’s post is full of shit and lovely embellishments.

  19. NC Gent says:

    That was an odd post Singh, and I am assuming maybe the writing style is a cultural difference or English isn’t your first language.

    I am curious though now on other people’s experience…. for your face-to-face meeting, what percentage of the time does the person that shows up actually resemble the person in their profile? In my most recent experience, it was 1 out of 5. Historically, it is roughly 1 of 3 that resemble their profiles.

  20. onyx_percula says:

    So who has either relocated a SB or an SB that relocated?

    What made you comfortable, confident enough to move? How far were you into the relationship before committing to the move?

    How did it work out? What problems came up?

  21. onyx_percula says:

    @ Durlabh Singh — SB initial meetings are like a carnival side show. You are attracted by all the imagery, the talk, the promise of something truly special waiting inside.

    When you get inside the show begins, most of the time what got to buy the ticket is not what is awaiting inside, just a pale shade of the picture painted. Just enough to not be a bold face lie. Sometimes you get lucky and all the hype turns out to be true. If you get really lucky the show is much much better than all the hype and sales.

    The check for dinner is your ticket to the show. There wouldn’t be a carnival if all of the side shows where free πŸ˜‰

  22. sweetie says:

    Durlabn, you sound like Beck.

  23. sweetie says:

    NC Gent and Genuine, I am all for a mini meet. I am location bound in central FL college town, though and not much of a driver. So, heads up on that.

  24. NC Gent says:

    Hi Sweetie & Genuine — maybe we can have a mini-blog meet. I have a meeting coming up in central Florida – exact date to be determined.

  25. sweetie says:

    Genuine, where about in FL are you?

  26. GenuineSD says:

    @sweetie… Florida? same here!

  27. Durlabh Singh says:

    (My experiences at the site.)

    SUGAR BABE.

    β€œI would like to make your acquaintance and possibly meet you.
    I am a married woman but my partner has allowed me to find other man for having
    fun and good time and I have allowed him to do the same if he wants.”

    So wrote sugar babe.

    Sugar dad was interested and so he replied in affirmative.

    β€œI am keen to meet you and want to see you in person near my place soon.”

    So a meeting was arranged in the lounge of a posh hotel near by.

    He visited the hotel on the appointed time and w eventually found her tucked into a corner and found her older than she looked in her photograph. She has already ordered a sumptuous meal for her and tucking into it heartily. She did not show much enthusiasm for his arrival and even sapped his enthusiasm by her behaviour.
    He sat opposite to her and she suggested that he should order a meal for himself as she would enjoy eating together with him. He was curious about her and wanted to know more about her. She told him that she was originally from Brazil and had a Brazilian father and an English mother. She moved to London and has been there for number of years and do not intend to go back to Brazil in the near future.
    She was continuously looking at his face, scrutinizing his each expression and gesture like a hunter scrutinising his victim. She made his next move after making sure that he would not run away from her casting net.

    She took out her mobile and fiddled with it stating that she had received a text message from her neighbour stating that her daughter had come home earlier and was waiting outside her home and pleaded that she had to go home but would be back soon, to work out future arrangements and went away.
    He had a feeling that she had done a runner without paying the bill for her meals as to get a free meal from him and that she would not be back. He went outside in the balcony as to eat in the balcony looking over the river. It was a pleasant day and while eating his meals, he watched various boats docked at the river and ripples and broken reflections of boats, river and the building. It looked like an impressionist painting.

    Like so many females beforehand, he was not surprised to have been taken for a ride by the scheming females who always wanted free meals from willing men who are always conned by presence of young females.

    He never expected to see her again but after two months he received an email from her, apologizing her sudden departure and not footing her bill at the hotel and furthermore she thanked me for his pleasant company and for treating her like a lady.
    She further informed him that she would like to meet him to make further arrangements and that she was sincere in her quest. He foolishly agreed for another meeting.
    Another communication was received from her a few days afterward requesting him to deposit Β£500 in her bank account pending future arrangements as she was doing him a favour for giving him her excellent and sophisticated companionship.
    He just laughed at the suggestion.

    Durlabh Singh Β© 2013

  28. DorkyGuy says:

    From the last blog:

    “If you are looking for a woman with brains and class you can find her on SA; she’s the one who knows how to use a semi-colon.” ~ Spicey

    Some girls think a semi-colon is a form of punctuation. Other girls think semi-colon is slang for anal sex. I like both girls, because either way you interpret it, a semi-colon can be a creative alternative to a period.

  29. sweetie says:

    Oh, Dash! Thank you, sir! πŸ˜‰

  30. Dashel says:

    Good luck Sweetie!

  31. sweetie says:

    I might have a good lead, ladies and gents! Quite excited, if I may say so myself. Not SA, by the way. I’m damn curious about the sex… So, a few more dates and we’ll see how it goes. Fingers crossed!

    Cheers to that! Oh, the moon is beautiful in my part of Florida right now. :)

  32. DorkyGuy says:

    @flyR~ I have an idea… let me know what ya think.

    The Secret Service should set up a top secret escort service that is free to all elected officials. The girls would be sworn to secrecy, and there would be no risk of scandal or blackmail. It removes a perk from the lobbyist tool-belt, and it reduces the chance for lobbyists or foreign governments to use blackmail.

    Think it would work? It would be an equal opportunity thing… I think both Hillary Clinton and Michele Bachmann would definitely benefit from an occasional guilt-free boinking.

  33. flyR says:

    @Dork – Ya’ll missed the new (now former) San Diego mayor who racked up something like 20 gropes in less than a year. The obvious explanation for this is that he spent decades in Congress where it was expected. Lobbyists send “associates” over to his office to show their appreciation all the time and there are always groupies hanging out (Pit Lizards in the racing world) .

  34. DorkyGuy says:

    “It’s also a place free of politics and the other garbage that we trudge through in our daily lives.”

    Unless you are talking about Anthony Wiener, Bill Clinton, Newt Gingrich, or Arnold Schwarzenegger. Love for beautiful women seems to cross all political boundaries. It may be the best reasons to go into politics. Once you get elected, all you have to do is set up a twitter account or hire an intern or maid.

  35. flyR says:

    @ New – NC’s advice was priceless.

    I think the key test between industrial debutante and sugar baby can be summed up as – It’s somewhat of a continuum – If you are just checking is only to be sure there’s not a reason to reject intimacy you’re probably on the commercial side while if what you are looking for is reasons to be with someone you’re in sugarland.

    One of the first questions a younger potential SB might ask is if she feels comfortable with / attracted to someone who is older. Does the idea of having a secret lover/benefactor who worships her body and nurtures her mind bring a smile.

  36. onyx_percula says:

    @ new&confusedSB — You have some good advice, but I want to add mine too.

    I agree with everyone else don’t do anything you are uncomfortable with, but at the same time don’t let your past define your present either. From a pure science point of view, you brain is going to change very significantly from your late teens to your mid 20’s before its done growing, changing and maturing. Hence the stereotype of not recognizing someone coming back from college, well they aren’t the seem person that left four years. So how you felt in the past may not be as valid now or in a couple years from. Just be honest with yourself and you will find a good course for yourself.

    Money changes things, and in the current state of things money is tight. Lot’s of desperate girls out there. But trust me when I say neither an SD or SB wants to feel like they are only making a transaction, money or sex. It’s not rewarding injects suspicion and doubt into another wise working arrangement.

    @ SS1959 — Sounds like you two aren’t communicating all that well. Talk to her, if its not going to work, assuming she isn’t a pea brain she will understand.

    @ SA — A thought… Wouldn’t be cool to have a tour to major cities in the US/CA for members to meet in person. It could be a profit center by charging admission/tickets, driving new memberships, good publicity and good for the members. Setup a booth for new SBs to sign up, get a “professional” picture taken for their profile, help them create their profile. Make it an all day/weekend event, entertainment, fun and lots of SDs and SBs. Maybe get some learning sessions, “ask a guru” type thing.

  37. sweetie says:

    Genuine and NC Gent, I’d be interested in meeting up, should the stars properly align. I have people I miss in Chicago.

  38. flyR says:

    @Zack –

    This is not just a blog but a refuge where many share what they do not share with friends and associates. It’s also a place free of politics and the other garbage that we trudge through in our daily lives.

  39. NC Gent says:

    Genuine SD — sorry I missed your question at first. I could potentially do a blog meet in Chicago near the end of October or an NYC meet mid-December. Not sure if that would sync with other people :)

  40. Zack says:

    @ gtt. Because I’m new, this my first go at blogging, and I’m delighted to rant where people actually help and don’t immediately judge (and dismiss, ha) me as a flake.

    I’ll get better, but can’t type long…I’m on travel :)

  41. new&confusedSB says:

    You all are right. I don’t want to do anything (like @Sweetie said) out of desperation for money. I am overwhelmed and I do need to take a breather.
    @flyR- sometimes its hard to find one who will be your older mentor but I know they are out there.
    @NC Gent- you are right. I am not ready for a sugar daddy dating website. And I think that is exactly why I posted my question. I think I saw the point between SB & prostitute.
    What I’m going to do is read. Learn. And think about what I want. I need to list some things you guys have said such as being comfortable and selective. Caring and respectful.
    I do know that I want to take the road towards the SDSB world. I am financially struggling. But I need to find a median between all that. And not toy with someone just as much as I wouldn’t want anyone to toy with me. I think I will just make a new profile when I am comfortable and ready. Thank you.!

  42. NC Gent says:

    @SS1959 — I think given that it is sugar and it has only been 3 months that a phone call is acceptable. Just be honest for the reason. As flyR suggested, maybe you can come to a new arrangement with an adjustment to time spent together and allowance, but only you know the details. Also, from my experience, when two people want to make a relationship work, even a sugar relationship, they usually find a way.

    @New&Confused – from your writings and anxiety, I highly doubt that you are cut out for sugar dating. I am going to be blunt and very cold in answering “when you really need the money but you know you won’t actually like him?” That is what a prostitute does (although I am sure some prostitutes like some of their clients). If you are hanging out with a guy only for the money, it isn’t healthy for either one of you. Also, as others suggested, the guy isn’t an SD because he is looking for a gf not a sugar baby. I would suggest not only moving on, but also moving out of the sugar world.

    I hope everyone else’s sugar is sweet!

  43. GenuineSD says:

    @ Beach_Girl. Good morning sweetie. That’s an awesome avatar!

    @all. There was a brief discussion last week about a blog meet up sometime…. Is there any interest in doing something ? I’m happy to try to organize a get-together …

    @new&confused
    1) if he wants a live-in, meet the family, etc… He’s not an SD… He’s looking for a girlfriend

    If you don’t like him don’t do it…. As others have said: don’t let money supplant good judgement…. Follow your instincts …

    Screen carefully, I agree with FlyR… Find a very caring, respectful, experienced SD…

  44. gtt_envy says:

    @ss1959, just have the conversation both of you will adjust and come up with something or it will end and you guys will move on.

    I hate when they end because looking for a SB is almost like a job just so much work to find one that works. My most recent one that I had a 8hr date with 10 days ago is perfect. So, far is no questions superior to any SB I’ve had in the past.

    This next date we are really going to see if we “FIT” together, so as long as that goes well. I need to watch out cause she’s badass!!

    What type of frequency are you looking for? Just wondering my schedule is always packed and she is works/school, so we only hang out once a month which is how all of my previous SB’s have been anyway.

    We are doing a weekend a month now Fri-Sun πŸ˜‰ good luck!!

    • SD Guru says:

      @Spicey
      “It lasted longer than four hours and I think I’m broken”

      I hope you’re living it up in one of the three Aman resorts in Bali. If not then you should ask the Pirate to put you up there. That should make up for the blue pill! :mrgreen:

  45. flyR says:

    @SS 1959 – Perhaps share with her your conflict- that you like her but the schedules do not seem to match. BTW I have been there and done that. It was hard to do but these are supposed to be comfortable, somewhat drama free and an evening that you can look forward to.

  46. flyR says:

    @ confused ” I don’t want myself to become easy”

    Be selective. My guess is that a lot of SB’s have fewer partners than their IRL friends, roommates, sorority members etc. Others may have more but do what’s comfortable for you .

    For thousands of years younger women have found it beneficial to leave their “group” for time with an older mentor, SD etc, This is not something that just appeared with the internet. Students and professors have been having sex since arrangements were turned in on stone tablets.

    My parting advice would be that if your sexual partners have been few, find an SD who worships you and whom you feel comfortable with, almost regardless of the allowance. That doesn’t mean allow yourself to be taken advantage of but rather be very selective.

  47. ss1959 says:

    Breaking it off with an SB –

    I’ve been in an arrangement with my SB for 3 months now. She’s great fun to be with; smart and sexy and kind. But our schedules don’t mesh. Between her school and my work we just can’t manage to get together, so I reluctantly have decided I need to end our relationship.

    So now the question arises, since we can’t make our schedules mesh to get together, how do I handle the break up? I hate the idea of just doing it over the phone, or even worse via email. But it also seems very unfair to let it wait weeks until I manage to find time to see her on a day she isn’t either in school or working at her internship.

    What to do? What to do?

  48. SugarySpicey says:

    Speaking of blue pills – when in Bali do NOT take recreational Viagara! Ouch! It lasted longer than four hours and I think I’m broken.

  49. DorkyGuy says:

    Random thought… Why did Neo take the red pill, when the blue pill was probably Viagra? I bet Brandon took the blue pill, and woke up a sugar guru

  50. sweetie says:

    Confused, enjoying and having sex does not make one easy. Having sex is great! You should have sex with whomever you want, as long as it is consensual and safe.

  51. sweetie says:

    Confused, you should never approach an arrangement out of desperation for money! It will not work out. Same case if you know you won’t like the SD, do not get involved with him nor lead him on.

    Ask yourself what it is that you want, besides financial assistance, and what will you be ok with in an arrangement. Unless you have given SD/SB relationship some serious thought, do not make any decisions. This is not to be taken lightly. You seem overwhelmed with the situation you have created for yourself, so take a deep breath and think about what it is you want from an SD, what your ideal arrangement would look like. Do your research!!! Then go get what you know you want.
    I’ll repeat, do not be desperate for money, or you’ll regret your decisions.
    Also, keep in mind intimacy is a very important part of an arrangement. If that gives you qualms, don’t do it. Be specific about it in your profile, though, and make sure the potential SD is aware of that, so he knows what he’s getting into from the get go.

    I suggest you check out the sugar dating tips link on the right side of the blog, it has lots of information about SD/SB relationships and rules. Good luck!

  52. new&confusedSB says:

    Here’s a burning Q I have for SB’s. What happens when you find a SD that wants a real relationship? Meaning… he offers for me to live with him? Meet his parents…etc. anyone ever go through this? And what do you do when you really need the money but you know you won’t actually like him?
    Also, was anyone ever a guardian to their Y? I mean, I’ve held my sex so limited. Meaning..one person. Now many are wanting sex (of course) but how do you let your guard down knowing you don’t let yourself have easy sex like that? I don’t want myself to become easy. I’m uptight when it comes to sex. Any pointers gladly appreciated.

  53. Daniel says:

    Re: the original topic. Comparing sugar to marriage is pointless, as they are not interchangeable. You’re comparing apples to oranges, as sugar is designed to be NSA (at least to start) while the entering argument for marriage is, by definition, long term love and commitment.

  54. gtt_envy says:

    @Zack, if you are looking for topics to debate there are many forums for that. Why the desire to talk about random topics?

    @SSpicey, Congratz I’m glad your fears have been eased and you are having a great time!! Pull out the Vibrator next time πŸ˜‰ and glad you are making memories.

  55. Zack says:

    More? Ic. Somebody “Do Something” b4 elephant Head comes on and starts singing….

  56. Zack says:

    Ok, so that went nowhere. With a nod to Mr.s Brooks, et al, History of the world?

    Politics?

    So, what shall it be for this Basher guy?

  57. sweetie says:

    Good to hear from you, Sugary. Hang in there, I’m glad you’re cold headed.

  58. SugarySpicey says:

    Here in Bali – The Pirate is being everything I love, and it is breaking my heart, because it just points out even more what we can’t have.

    I even faked it last night – which is quite sad considering how long we went at it. My heart was too in it, and now I don’t know how to extricate myself.

  59. Zack says:

    100%?

    not 0%?

  60. Zack says:

    Hmm. Ok, then. New game:

    “Most Hated star trek character:” Guess, please

    What

    % of the bloggers (only) will

    answer:

    “Wesley”

    not 42!

  61. Treasured says:

    Gtt – No. We met. It didn’t work out. So for 8 months we were just friendly. Then, out of the blue (well, for him, I knew he wouldn’t be able to find someone better :D, even if she was living closer), last February, he offered to go to Thailand. And I agreed. Have been together since (and it makes it complicated that we live in a different countries).

    BUT. To answer your question… It has progressed from SD/SB, so now he is just my Daddy πŸ˜€ And, for example, in July I couldn’t meet (my fault), but he still transferred the funds.
    I am a verrrryyyy spoiled Kittah πŸ˜€ But Daddy likes it that way πŸ˜‰

  62. Zack says:

    What, I missed it again?

  63. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars,
    Hope you all had a great weekend πŸ˜€

  64. gtt_envy says:

    @Treasured, so your SD pays you a allowance even though you guys haven’t seen each other for 8 months? Just wondering!!

  65. Treasured says:

    Flyer – perhaps πŸ˜€

    Treasured – the last hope of all the gay people in the world! πŸ˜€

  66. Zack says:

    @ frank: Or you could just get drunk. She’d pay through the nose for those little bottles.

  67. Flyer says:

    @treasured

    Perhaps you have converted him.

  68. frank says:

    I recommend you make use of that 13 hours and join the mile high club. Should set the trip off on the right footing.

    BTY, I am the volcano

  69. Zack says:

    @SS Be safe, have fun, too! & pls Don’t forget to write, lol, this is funnier than hell, imho. :)

  70. SugarySpicey says:

    Checked in for a 13 hour flight. Trying to put on a good attitude – I just can’t access my inner SB tonight, I want to be a pouting bitch right now. Hoping a good night’s sleep will change that.

  71. Treasured says:

    Good luck Spicey πŸ˜€

    By the way, after not seeing Daddy for 8 months after initial meeting (did talk on Skype, time to time), the first meet up was a 2 week holiday with him in Thailand πŸ˜€ The best ever decision πŸ˜€

    Ummm…. Lazy afternoon for me. Had an amazing 6th Birthday party for my amazing son yesterday. Except for the fact, that his Godfather/my best friend (who is supposed to be gay) practically admitted he is in love with me. I kinda knew that already… Up to a point. But I did not know he also suffers because of that. Damn. He was supposed to be gay!

  72. SugarySpicey says:

    I texted him, his response, “I promise.”

    We’ll see.

    I’m scared. What else can I do? #Waitandsee

  73. SugarySpicey says:

    Maybe it’s a girl thing, but we’re paranoid about flying to a misogynistic portion of third world. For some silly reason, from our airport pickup we’d like a response email. Nothing dramatic, just a pre-flight confirmation of, “I didn’t pass out indefinitely in a pool hall I’ll be there.” #Ohwell #ThankGodforAmericanExpress

  74. SugarySpicey says:

    Wow! MILK just emailed with a parachute. I didn’t know he still followed the blog. Hmmmm, convenient considering I’m about to check in at the airport, and Pirate and I are still volatile – but he may be on flights or something.

  75. SugarySpicey says:

    I’m the tornado.

    Airport, LAX, TPE, CGK, DSP – then who knows what?

    Scared!

  76. Zack says:

    Which raises the question, how long until Bali gets internet?

  77. DorkyGuy says:

    Tornado and Volcano? Just following the analogy… One is all hot air, and the other has a whole lot of crazy just under the surface ready to erupt at any moment? Which is which?

  78. Zack says:

    You might put your age as “69.”

  79. SugarySpicey says:

    W/R/T the kick in the pants, yes I’ve become a drama girl with The Pirate. He and I push all of each other’s crazy buttons, yell, cry, talk about forever, then push each other away – it’s all very dysfunctional and very exciting. I’ve never been in a tumultuous, passionate, love like this.

    Will it last forever? There’s no way it could like this. But, for now it’s the most alive I’ve felt in years. His name pops up on text and my heart starts to pound, while other parts of me start to pulse.

    “Go to my place, bring the restraints, and the hook” was a recent message. And, crazy fighting or not, that is a command I can’t resist!

    I’m not needing to get married or make babies, so Mr. Right now suits me fine – unless he becomes Mr. Right, or Mr. Right comes along.

  80. SugarySpicey says:

    Dancing – you could set your age to 25 in the search field, then clarify exactly what you said in your profile, or vice versa (I’d try a three part test – age as it is and say nothing; age set older then in the bio on your profile give your real age and explain that you’re mature and looking for men who enjoy mature, grounded women; age set correctly and then explain that you’re mature …) see if the responses change and report back.

    All SBs should update their profiles often, it keeps you appearing high in search results and prevents you from looking like a jaded veteran/professional.

  81. dancingSB says:

    @ Treasured. Haha. Thanks for the welcome!
    I think you gave @ Spicey the wake up call and kick she needed. Seems that she’s caught herself now.

    @ Spicey “…A bit of what happens when a tornado meets a volcano…”
    Love that analogy. It shall be stolen! πŸ˜€ Despite everyone’s slight disdain or disapproval for the situation and the drama involved, I’m sure they are a little jealous of the passionate making up you’ll be getting up to soon! Haha.
    Happy Birthday girl!! And enjoy!!

    Dear @ Scofflaw, I’m currently blog crushing on you!
    It’s honestly great to know that there are SDs on SA like you with a concept of SB/SD relationships that I share in terms of chemistry, etc.
    I would like to argue with you about the maturity of younger SBs. I’m quite young and always told quite mature beyond my years, refreshingly so. However, looking around at the average girl my age, I understand you perfectly. It’s sad however, because where IRL, I’m treated like 26-30 (the ages people often assume I am based on the way I carry myself) and have never even dated a guy under 40, when I put down my age on SA, I’m sure I scare off some of the pot SDs I’d like to get to know. However, where I do dislike being grouped with that younger stereotype, I’m not one to lie about age. (Open to suggestions about solving this dilemma from all you sugars, ofcourse!)
    I like the profile especially the “variety of culinary interests”.. My interests have been further peaked! Hmmm… Master Chef in the making? Haha!
    However, I would agree with @ Treasured’s suggestion for the photo.

  82. onyx_percula says:

    @ gtt_envy — You have SB “Playboy” mixed up with SB #2. I was with #2 for 3+ months. It didn’t start out as a SB/SD thing. We met thru a mutual friend and hit it off the first time we met. We were strictly BF/GF for the first few weeks until it became obvious that she couldn’t support herself right now. That is when after much talking we decided to “convert” her to a SB with a allowance. It was complicated to say the least…

    BTW I got a call from #2’s BFF late last night to tell me what was going on. I have always known #2 was Bi and really had no problem with it. It turns out her high school flame came back into her life. They are in a exclusive relationship now. Her new GF is very controlling, jealous and will not let her contact me. The BFF told me the new GF has been intercepting my attempts to contact her, took her phone and got her a new one. The BFF did pass on a message from her that was apologetic. I kind of feel sorry for her, she told me about that relationship in HS, it was abusive and it sounds like its going to be worse this time.

    @ Scofflaw — Excellent post! Welcome to the blog, I think you have some good to add.

  83. sweetie says:

    Happy Birthday to you!

  84. SugarySpicey says:

    Sweetie – Thanks! I’ll report back to the blog safe and dramaless in about a week. Happy Birthday to me, and hopefully an adventure to remember, regardless of what happens with my Matey, arrrrgggg!

  85. sweetie says:

    @Scofflaw, welcome to the blog. Your insight about the SD/SB profile and relationship makes sense. Wish it were that easy to put in practice. Keep in mind, the SBs get to read the same “love to laugh, work hard play hard, finer things in life etc” cliches all day long. It’s terrible. I do believe most people on SA have no clue what they want or why they’re on the website, sadly.

    Regarding the photo on profile, I prefer profiles that have a photo. If they don’t, I ask for access to their private pics, if the profile sounds appealing. Still, I’d rather see a picture and avoid the “no chemistry part” as soon as possible. It just eliminates one more step out of the equation.

    @Sugary, love, I have not said anything about your Facebook drama. About Bali, just be careful out there, try to have a good time, come back in one piece and possibly with less stress and some resolution about your pirate ordeal. I’ll say it again, this guy is not good for you, and you know it. Have a safe flight and keep in mind we care for you here on the blog.

  86. SugarySpicey says:

    Lol – Flyr, NO I am NOT bringing anybody money. I am taking a suitcase full of books and clothes to an orphanage (which I arranged independent of him).

    Since I told him not to post on my wall he’s stopped. He was aggravated that I asked him to stop due to a photo I felt was in poor taste, but he’s complied.

    He and I are a bit of what happens when a tornado meets a volcano, we fight passionately (and with just the slightest provocation) then we make up passionately.

    I tend to pursue safe, easy, reliable men who require no maintenance (or Subbys who do what I say) so I’m a bit out of my element with this higher-energy, playboy type of man. But, I agree with Treasured’s point, the drama goes two ways – all of the type of stuff he does on his Facebook wall I do on my blog. The difference being he’s up front with the sugar part of his life, and I prefer to keep it under wraps.

  87. Flyer says:

    @spicey – I realize it may be a day late but this has serious disaster written all over it. If the guy doesn’t respect your requests he does not respect you.

    You’re bringing him money ?

    I think Midwest would simplify the recommendation. EJECT now.

  88. cat says:

    I apparently am doing a lot wrong, or maybe i’m doing just a few important things incorrectly. I feel bad and embarrassed because I have received NO messages, no winks, no replies. I’ve sent 4 messages, six winks (approximately),and had about 20 veiws of my profile. No one is interested. I started reading this blog yesturday, and I got many excellent tips. Also the SA support team emailed me that I need to write a more detailed profile and have more pictures. I would so appreciate any and all advice as to what I need to do to get a response from a SD! My SA nickname is “Cat”. Im very new to texting, and computers. I mean I have very little idea as to what the heck i’m doing. HELP PLEASE! :-)

  89. SugarySpicey says:

    Dorky – alas there is no nefarious super villain, he lives in Java and works for a very reputable international company. But an orphanage scam would be a great way to hide sugar, if one didn’t care about the whole “going to he’ll” part.

    Treasured – yours was the exact advice I needed. Trust a European, The Pirate says American women are always looking for a reason to write a man off, and that women in other parts of the world have resigned themselves that men suck.

    Since I’m going, just a couple more hours now, then checking the miserable bitch is exactly what I need to do. No point in starting the trip on a bad foot. Turning on my happy face, putting everything else in the past, and I’ll figure out Bali based on the dynamic between us when I’m there – which will be amazing, it always is.

  90. gtt_envy says:

    @FB, lol that’s hillarious :)

  91. FatBastardSD says:

    @onyx

    Don’t give up on what you want. You did not become successful by doing that in business so don’t do it in your personal life!

    You need to show her you care. Do something romantic! If it was me I would make a flyer with pictures of both of you on it and a caption saying “Missing. True Love!”. Post the flyer throughout her apartment complex. This will get her attention!

  92. FatBastardSD says:

    @Scofflaw

    This is the best summary of now to make a good SB profile that I have seen.

  93. DorkyGuy says:

    Wouldn’t it be something if her boyfriend runs the “orphanage”, and the money for the plane ticket and allowance are coming from the donations that she collected?

    Maybe he is an evil genius!

  94. Treasured says:

    @Scofflaw – A picture does draw some initial attention, but for me it was what was written in a profile.
    Ah, ok. Will use Daddy’s account to check your profile.

    Ok. Your profile looks great. I would add up a picture, any picture, maybe partially showing your body, or just a picture of a shoulder in a suit…
    But all in all – I see nothing wrong with your profile.
    Actually, it should weed off all those who are there for cash only.

  95. Treasured says:

    @Scofflaw – WELCOME to the blog and GREAT advise to all the new SBs :)

    @Dancing – oh, they love to hate us πŸ˜€ And welcome too πŸ˜€

  96. Treasured says:

    Spicey.

    I will be honest. You sound like a pathetic, miserable bitch, with psycho tendencies at the moment. I love you, but, girl, you need to get it together. And the other bloggers just feed it up: he is an asshole, why I am deserved to be treated like this? How could he? How the fuck you know!? You never met him!
    Excuse my language.. Not!

    Chill. Look at yourself from the side. Chill again. Guy is in Bali. You are going there. He got the ticket. You knew what you are getting into (please don’t tell me that before you agreed to go long haul with him you didn’t have a vague idea what kind of a person he is.)

    He is miiiileessss away! So, whatever you created in your head – it is only in your head at the moment. Yes, he has racy pictures, yes, he teases you. But honestly, at the moment I haven’t seen anything criminal done from his side.
    You yourself said you are not exclusive. You, yourself are not exclusive. So what is with the drama?

    Go to Bali, check all yourself. And stop behaving like a paranoid bitch – that is not the girl he liked, for fuck’s sake!

  97. SugarySpicey says:

    Thanks Jersey, It’s so stupid that I’d even have to look into that, once he changes his photo it won’t matter so much, or if he is less present on my wall I think that will be better too.

    I realized what is going on. He thinks I’m ashamed of him. I am, I guess, I think his online, party-guy persona is unattractive and I don’t want to be publicly affiliated with it. When he felt judged he lashed out childishly.

    The ticket could be changed/ traded in for something else. But, I’m going on this trip. The rest will be determined as it goes.

    He just texted that he’ll email me details of what to expect after he lands.

  98. Jersey Darling says:

    By the way, I believe on Facebook you can just block someone from writing on your wall. Not block them completely.

  99. Jersey Darling says:

    Spicey – is he paying for your tickets? I gotta say, going out there when you’re pretty sure it’s going to be a bad trip will be a terrible idea. It’s only going to depress you (I’ve been there).

  100. gtt_envy says:

    @onxy, dude that is crazy shit!! I can’t believe you attempted to track her down like that. It was obviously over after you dined at the Y (hobbyist term) and the communication ended almost immediately after.

    Good luck with the next one!! NNot so attached next time.

    Its easy yo verify just get google voice and send a text “Hey what ya doing tonight?” Most 20 something will at least say “??” Or “who is this?”

  101. SugarySpicey says:

    It’s decided. I’m going to plan the trip I want to take. Then, if he’s an asshole, at least I don’t waste a chance to see Bali.

  102. SugarySpicey says:

    Dorky – he’s definitely a BF not an SD. I can get myself home if I need too (first rule of travel).

    I hadn’t considered that I may be feeling a sense of obligation to go. I’ll have to contemplate if there’s any element of “what will people think.”

    He replied now though, with: “There will be a lot of people trying to give you a ride at the airport. Just collect your bag and wait. I’m not sure where. I’ll figure it out when I go there.”

  103. DorkyGuy says:

    On the topic of Facebook in general… I quit Facebook several years ago. I had an epiphany that it was adding more drama to my relationships than joy.

    This seems to be born out… In the last year, there have been two separate studies that show that Facebook use tends to make people sadder rather than happier.

  104. DorkyGuy says:

    @Spicy~ If you get there, and things turn bad, do you have resources to get out of the situation and get home on your own?

    Why not just cancel the trip, and paypal the donations to the orphanage, explaining that you couldn’t submit them in person because something unexpected prevented travel?

    Seriously, it sounds like he is making you miserable. It sounds like you have already decided that he is bad for you, but just don’t have the nerve to cancel, because you feel the pressure of expectations. You don’t usually strike me as the sort of person who would fake her way through that much time with someone, even having sex with them, out of a sense of obligation and “what people will think of me”.

    Who cares what people think? Who cares if you already told everyone about Bali? Pick another destination, and tell everyone about that one. Plans fell through, so you decided to go somewhere else instead.

    If this guy were an actual boyfriend, I would say he has too much power over you. That’s doubly true as a SD.

  105. SugarySpicey says:

    Dorky – I could unfriend him, but that makes me so sad, being half a world away makes it really hard. Facebook allows us to see what’s going on in each other’s life. I’d rather not block him, but he leaves me no choice. Though he hasn’t done anything since blowing up at me when I told him he needed to stop posting on my wall.

  106. Beach_Girl says:

    Spicey~ Again, you can not control what he does, what he posts or what pic he has… if you don’t want it on your facebook, delete! anyways he’s pic is going to change at some point… yeah, I have kids of friend on mine too… if they don’t like it, not my problem I cannot control what people put on their own facebook page. And, even if ” he’s making a spectacle of himself, in front of my family. ” Like I said you cannot control what people, friends, family do or say on their OWN page… if you don’t want it on your wall, delete… but this is about you, not him. If you have business contacts on your facebook page and you are so concerned about what other people will post etc… then delete them. simple. nothing you can do, the reason you are so upset is because he hurt you in that he is with women , other than you, etc…
    As for the trip, if you made plans to work at an orphanage then you should go, if you want to, but don’t say that it’s because you told people you were going to Bali etc… please, you can always cancel and send the money to the orphanage another way.
    You need to take a step back sweet girl, you are spiraling here. Read you posts as if it was me telling you the story, tell me what to do?( tell youself in your head or you can even mail me, MissMontreal1 at g mail ) sometime we are so into what is going on we cannot see the picture…

  107. DorkyGuy says:

    @Spicy… Can’t you just block him? Boundaries, girl. You gave him warnings about posting, he disregarded the warnings. He is enjoying the power of trampling over you. You have the power to put a stop to it, but he doesn’t think you will.

  108. SugarySpicey says:

    Sweetie – I’ve got children who read my Facebook posts, young nieces and nephews, plus in my career my Facebook feed generates professional contacts. In that photo he’s got his hand on some girl’s breast as she sits on his lap (plus two other women fawning on him) and he kept posting on my wall. The first time he did it I deleted the post and told him I didn’t want that photo in my feed, but he just kept posting, on every single one of my comments.

    That draws attention, it makes people curious, so they click on his profile I’m sure – then instead of being discreet (as he knows he needs to be) he’s making a spectacle of himself, in front of my family.

    I have to go on the trip. I’ve made commitments to go volunteer for a week at an orphanage, and I’ve collected donations for them. He’s being such a complete asshole, I can’t see a way to turn the “sexy trip” around. Lots of places I’d rather go, but I’ve already told everybody about Bali. I’m committed now. :(

    • 40SWM says:

      Ouch. That is being between a rock and a hard place. I think the lesson is that FB friending is even more sensitive than traveling thousands of miles overseas. FB is so public, that you need to really trust someone before letting them in. Not just a matter of honest/not a crook trust, but good judgment trust.

  109. DorkyGuy says:

    “Why do I let a guy who is such an asshole have such influence over me?” ~Spicey

    Answer that question, write a book with the answer, become a gazillionaire as a self-help guru, and find yourself a hot cabana boy SB!

  110. Beach_Girl says:

    onyx_percula~ She’s a SB yes? if my SD would poof after making plans… I would text and ask what was going on, but would never go to his house or push. It’s only been 4 days and you are in panic mode and went to her house. I would have waited longer, more than a week then maybe call his work… This is sugar and people flake all the time, even after 3 months…

    Jersey~ Yes, we need to catch up

    Spicey~ I didn’t mean you leave him, lol… you can stop giving him that power over you by being you! πŸ˜€ you’re a great person, yes a little bitchy but we like you that way πŸ˜‰ and you deserve to be treated right. Is your trip paid for? do you have money to do things once you are there? if so, Have a blast! if not, can you cash in the ticket? stay home or go to an all inclusive somewhere closer that you can afford. About the facebook photo, I think you are overreacting , girl, I have friends that had crazy stuff on facebook and yeah my family is on there… they are friends not me… if you don’t like it, delete and move on!!! lol… it’s hard to let it go, you are very emotionally involved and maybe in love with this person? you need to be in love with you first girlie!!!
    one of my friends had a pic of him and a pron star in a, should not be taken as a photo position, pic on his profile … and he’s my Ex!!! lol… it’s ok, so what? no biggie for me…

  111. SugarySpicey says:

    Beach – you’re so right. I broke me. I allowed this. I let him treat me poorly and continued to stick around anyway. I AM the one who must now walk away.

    W/R/T the photo – I hate it. But my issue is he’s writing on my wall, where my family sees it, with this hideous, pervy, offensive photo. I asked him not to write on my wall while he has that profile photo and he blew up at me for being judgemental, then went radio silent on our plans for when/how/where we’re meeting when I arrive – did I mention I leave in 24 hours and have NO idea?

    Guess I’ve been abandoned en route to the third world.

  112. sweetie says:

    Sugary, we’re all on your side. This guy is such bad news, don’t even bother with him anymore. Move on, have your fun in Asia, and then come back without the drama. We’ll be here for you.

  113. onyx_percula says:

    @ Beach_Girl — No you don’t have the whole story or what you have right either. Monday we planned her birthday celebration in Vegas, picked out the Cirque shows she wanted to see and made plans for New Years Eve in Vegas too. We made the reservations sitting together in her apartment. She was so excited as it would the first time she was going as an adult, staying at the resort she always wanted to. No fights, disagreements, NOTHING that would indicate that we were having a problem. Her last to txt to me Monday night was “Thank you so much! No one has ever done anything like this for me, I can’t wait!”.

    If we had been fighting, I agree with you. We had txt’ed talked, emailed or seen each other damn near every day for the last 3+ months. The ONLY time we didn’t was when she broke her phone in rural OK on a trip. Literally the first thing she did when she replaced it was to txt me to let me know she was okay, because she didn’t want me to be worried about her.

    So you tell me if you had a relationship like that with any man under any circumstances and he suddenly stopped communicating how far would you go to be sure he was okay? Tell me you automatically assumed he dumped you.

  114. Jersey Darling says:

    @Spicey – You’re above that and deserve better. Don’t let him put you through the ringer.

    @Beach_Girl – Thank you for the well wishes :) I wasn’t affected by it but Seaside is taking a beating year after year. Very tragic. We should catch up via email!

    @Onyx – Why even spend any time thinking about it? Not to sound blunt, but either the site is worth using regardless, or you decide the scams are too much and leave. It’s sort of like lamenting spam in your email. You ignore it and move on.

  115. onyx_percula says:

    @ Jersey — These have been out right scams. People trying to get money sent Western Union or BitCion. The pictures they send or on the profile are definitely not them. They will not talk on the phone or video chat. Never meeting. I am betting more times than not its not even women on the other end.

    But yes I get your point, and today I am horribly jaded.

  116. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars πŸ˜€

    onyx_percula~ SERIOUSLY?!?!?! You went to her apartment? Ok, I might not know the whole story, but I think you said it’s been over 2 weeks since she contacted you, didn’t answer phone call or text, right? And you go to her APARTMENT? that is unacceptable in my book, sorry, just doesn’t work. If she didn’t answer you, then you should of gotten the message. Yes, not the right way to end things, maybe she is young and doesn’t know etiquette, most young people don’t coz it’s not taught anymore. Still, move on… I think that is kind of stalking! just my opinion…

    Spicey~ I don’t know the story here, I haven’t been around. This is what I think, if he’s your BF then ask him to remove the photo it makes you uncomfortable.. If he’s you SD, WTF, His page, his life… I don’t see how that make YOU look bad.. And second… no man has turned you into what you have become? Girl, you became that yourself, you gave him more power in your own mind, he didn’t do anything but be himself probably. If you put someone on a pedestal that is you, not him…That is what seems to be the problem, you made him better etc in your mind. You need to value yourself more than you value him…

    Jersey~ Hey girl? I hope you are ok, not sure if you are close to the shore or have friends there. Hope every one is ok
    We should catch up girlie! mail me πŸ˜€

  117. SugarySpicey says:

    Jersey! You are so right! I don’t even recognize the woman he’s turned me into. Never in my life has ANY man been so shitty to me.

  118. Jersey Darling says:

    And then forget him*

  119. Jersey Darling says:

    *fights the urge to get sucked back in*

    *loses*

    Spicey, don’t you view yourself as a goddess who deserves to be treated better than that? Seriously. The you that used to post on this blog would say screw this guy. Forget him, or use him for the Bali trip and then get him.

    Onyx, if you look for a scam in everything you will find it.

  120. SugarySpicey says:

    Ugggg! I’m supposed to check in 24 hours from now and The Pirate is being a complete asshole. His profile picture on Facebook is a pic of him surrounded by massage parlor whores, it’s a couple years old, but it is flattering to him or anyone who would date him. No class at all! Gross! Embarassing for him and me.

    With that unacceotable photo he was replying to my Facebook status updates, and, I felt, inappropriately drawing attention to himself. So, I deleted his comments and asked him not to post on my wall while he has that profile photo.

    He got offended and it became a fight. Why do I let a guy who is such an asshole have such influence over me?

    Grrrrr!!!

  121. GenuineSD says:

    @Treasured. Absolutely! You put that so very well!

    @onyx. I’ve got to agree, It’s really over.
    Any more effort on your part starts to feel like stalking… On to the next arrangement….

  122. SugarySpicey says:

    Onyx – it’s over dude, you’ve been dumped. Sorry, no further answer will be forthcoming.

  123. dancingSB says:

    Hey all Sugars!

    I usually just read and follow the blog but I’m really feeling for @ Onyx … So just stopped in to send you some hugs from the tropics! Hopefully something works out. Cheer up!

    Oh. And as far as mixing @ Spicey & @ Treasured goes… I’m sure it because you two are the blog daddies’ favorites! πŸ˜‰ Haha.

  124. Scofflaw says:

    I am a pot SD new to this site (Profile Number 1731796) and form of dating; while I have been on SA for only a few weeks and I have not yet met any SBs, reading profiles and this blog has been a hugely educational and eye-opening experience. When I first came to the site I’ll admit to being unclear about what SD/SB really entailed but now having read this entire blog over the past few days it really hit me that a real SD/SB relationship is exactly what I want and need. I come to this conclusion having been in several failed long term traditional relationships including a 10 yr marriage and knowing what works for me and what doesn’t in relationships. With that said as a pot SD I’d like to offer a few suggestions to SBs who may be frustrated by the number or quality of responses to their profiles.

    1) Everyone loves to laugh. Everyone loves long walks on the beach. Everyone is equally comfortable in jeans or a skirt. Everyone says they have a good sense of humor. These things are like the R, S, T, L N, and E of dating profiles; they are a given and don’t need to be stated. After a few hours of browsing profiles I’ve found these types of benign, vacuous, universally-true statements become reflexive triggers to move on to the next profile. It suggests no real effort and looks like your profile was copied and pasted from your equally vanilla Match profile. Nobody reads “I love to laugh” and thinks “OMG! how unique, I must meet her as most people I know hate to laugh.”

    2) What do you put in your profile? Easy… make it abundantly clear as to why I want to spend time with you? It is not for any of the R, S, T, L, N and E factors. Its also not because you are about to get a degree in journalism or you have a pet yorkie. At this stage I’m browsing profiles and I really don’t care about any of that. If I come to know you and care for you then all those things will ultimately be of interest (except the yorkie – I’ll never care about that), but when I’m initially browsing a profile these things quite frankly bore me.

    As a suggestion, envision yourself with an SD that you adore (and if you can’t do that cancel your SA account and go somewhere else) and describe a sunny afternoon day date, what a rainy evening might be like. Envision yourself as a blissfully happy SB and how your happiness translates into my happiness. After I read that you should make me think “Wow, I want that! I want to meet her and I want her to adore me.”

    Be OK with it taking a few days to write your profile and then always be re-writing it and editing it. Keeping thinking about what would make a pot SD completely enamored with you and you happily devoted so that when you spend time together it is magical and constantly figure out ways to express that.

    Something else not to put in your profile: how you are such a catch that I’d be lucky to have you and I’ll have to work hard at it. Yeah, that’s what I want, another area of my life where I have to work hard for something. That’s not why I am here. I’m not asking you to be easy, but there’s a huge difference between saying you are on a pedestal and I’d be lucky to be with you and saying you are an amazing SB because of what you offer in a relationship and me wanting to put you on a pedestal and then treating you as such.

    3) Don’t be negative. So many profiles just reek of negativity – scan your profile and find every negative word, phrase and connotation (“I won’t…” “Do not…” “Don’t even think of…”) and take them out and figure out how to express yourself positively. The last thing I want in an SB is a sense you are negative, have pre-set limits, are pre-disposed to saying “no” or are stressed by minor inconveniences. Be positive and happy. Not negative and stressed.

    4) Be honest about your age. Maybe I am wrong but I seem to look at a lot of profiles where the SB claims she is 20 but the pictures would suggest mid-20s to early-30s. I am 44 and prefer to be with someone in the mid-20 to early-30s (or older, I don’t really care), as I think there is a world of difference in maturity between 20-21 and 25+ which makes it is far easier to develop SD/SB chemistry. And as odd as it sounds one of the appeals to me about sugar lifestyle is it seems more honest than traditional relationships — motivations and expectations are clear — so be honest in your profile and trust that you are wanted as you are. You’ll probably find the need to be 20-21 years old to be appealing is a false stereotype.

    5) On sex. You don’t want to think that you are being paid for sex and I don’t want to think I am paying you for sex, and yet sex and money are in a way the magnet that initially draws us together. How to square that circle? This is only my perspective but I am not interested in transactional sex and I don’t want you to be either. If you are, fine, but you are not for me. I want the impression (and I hope it is more than just an impression) that you are only willing to have sex with someone that you have amazing chemistry with. While the potential for sex and money might be what catalyzes a first date, it is only chemistry and the possibility of amazing companionship that enables the second and a decision to move forward with an arrangement. And with that chemistry and companionship over time there is a natural desire for sex, and with chemistry and companionship of course there is a natural desire for financial support. From my perspective, I’m looking for a real SB (not an escort) and since chemistry comes about over time and not on a 2-date schedule sex won’t either and I’m more than OK with that. I want to have the sense that sex is important to you and because it’s important it is reserved for those that you feel connected with, and because it is for people you feel connected with it is AMAZING. That approach may not work for other SDs but for me its the only way forward and I suspect it is for a lot of SDs.

    Sorry this post ended up far longer than I intended but for someone serious about finding a true SB and who has read a lot of profiles and posts on this blog re: SBs frustrations with initiating dates I thought it might be helpful to offer viewpoints on what does and doesn’t work with respect to profiles. I have a feeling that I may be representative of a large pool of pot SDs who are also frustrated with the process, which leaves the impression we are all p4p faux-SD types. Now for a question for SBs…

    I only search for SBs who have a picture available on their profile. I however do not have a public picture on my profile but have private pictures (Profile Number 1731796), do SBs also filter pot SDs this way? Am I not being contacted by SBs for this reason?

  125. onyx_percula says:

    @ Treasured — Oh no, I didn’t even what an ankle cage was till I asked Spicey… but I have to admit I am a bit BDSM curious now.

    Well I have done everything I am going to reach out to #2. I went to her place, her car was there, her pups loose which she only does when she is home. No answer. tried her BBF who lives right above her, same thing. I left notes on each door to at least have the common decency tell me what is going on, even if its go F’yourself. At least I would be able to stop worrying, my mind wondering to all kinds of horrible thoughts.

  126. Treasured says:

    @Onyx: Spanking? Ankle cages? AND loves to give??!!!
    What a charming combination πŸ˜‰ WELL… Minus three SBs on a rotation would turn you into a perfect man πŸ˜›

    @Genuine… Me thinks the perfect threesome requires 100% all of the partners being into each other AND same lever of lovemaking skills.
    I do not enjoy giving my tongue a helicopter workout, for another girl to think that my Y will substitute for an ice-cream, so it would be perfectly fine to lick it with a vigour of a 85yo grandma.

    Anyone tried MMF threesome? Moi is trΔ“s curious, but worried that it might give Daddy a heart attack πŸ˜€

  127. GenuineSD says:

    WRT threesomes… I think it’s a question of balance. You have to have the right chemistry amongst three partners…. I try to couple, never found the balance….

  128. onyx_percula says:

    @ Treasured and Spicey — ref mixing you two up. I think its male mental distraction. They see Treasured’s legs in her “icon”… and think about spanking, ankle cages and other things fun when they see Spicey and well you know men, they aren’t really thinking too clearly at that point. LOL.

  129. onyx_percula says:

    @ gtt_envy — It’s not so much me looking (although I am) as it is getting contacted, checking it out and finding out that the person the other at the end is at the very least is not the person represented in their profile. More times than not the contact will want to take the chat off the site and if you do count on getting a sob story and request for money in english that looks more like it was written by Google translate than a real person.

    I agree SA is the best site, while I have met flakes here, one scam and one likely scam, it is SO much better than any other its not even funny.

    @ Exotic — Yep its turning out to be a emotional week. “Playboy” has completely stopped communicating, so that is over, scam or just changed her mind, doesn’t matter, she is gone.

    SB number 2 is AWOL for the week, she is not reading my txts, not answering my calls much less returning them. I have no idea if she lost her phone and my contact info (she can still find me, she knows where I work, live and what I drive), or is sitting in jail or the hospital or just doesn’t want anything more to do with me and doesn’t have the decency to tell me. This one is just killing me. She made me wish I was 20 years younger so I would have a chance to spend a lifetime with her, fell hard for her, and thought she did too.

    I am tempted to stop by her apartment or work and find out one way or another. But I keep having second thoughts as that seems way too much like stalking…

    SB number 1 is a mean jealous manipulative bitch at the slightest hint of other women around me. When she is feels secure she is sweet, a good friend and lover to me. So I dare not even think of mentioning #2 or “Playboy” within a mile of her if I want any female companionship the rest of this month, lol.

    Was contacted by a pot SB on here yesterday from Vegas telling she would be in town yesterday and wanted to meet. OK, sure I had looked at her profile a few times but never contacted her because I don’t do long distance. NCNS.

    It’s ironic that the conditions “demand” for a nice weekend at my fav Vegas resort being pampered and pleasured, and no one to go with. #1 has a gig this week, long story but its not something I can ask her to cancel. So instead I will be spending it canceling travel plans, reservations and trying to sell non-refundable tickets…

  130. Treasured says:

    Spicy – hormones do not agree to some women. At least not for me. The continues cycle ones, including Mirena coil, contain the same hormone which is released during pregnancy. In some women it can lead to water retention and other pregnancy related side effects.

    Personally for me, I rather have my cycle and weigh a stone less.

  131. SugarySpicey says:

    W/R/T that time of the month. Don’t know why any woman is still willing to tolerate that. There is no medical reason women need to have a period, and with earlier onset of menses and fewer pregnancies we’re having more periods than typical. Continuous cycle birth control is the best thing ever invented. Get on board girls!

  132. Exotic SB says:

    Good Morning Sugars! I hope everyone has a wonderful Friday :)

  133. Treasured says:

    @ ” I think there’s a huge difference in a threesome where the women are β€œequals” and perhaps friends vs bringing a hooker into the sugar relationship.”

    Strangely enough, the best threesomes, emotionally wise, were with a good friend of mine, who is definitely bi and who has some feelings for me too…

    Well, emotionally GOOD for ME πŸ˜€ Both other parties love me – no case for jealousy πŸ˜€

  134. flyr says:

    “”” regardless of whether the sex lives up to expectations, there is something pretty cool about a girl that is secure enough and cares enough about you to invite another girl in, just because she thinks you will like it. “”””

    Of course there’s the other side of the coin where she is sure she will like it. I briefly dated an attorney IRL who really wanted us to go to Vegas and have a hooker join us for the weekend. Based on my limited experience (primarily grad school) I think there’s a huge difference in a threesome where the women are “equals” and perhaps friends vs bringing a hooker into the sugar relationship.

  135. gtt_envy says:

    @onyx, why do you keep saying scams? You must really enjoy the looking part you seem to spend a lot of time searching. Imo, every site but sa.com sucks escorts galore.

  136. SugarySpicey says:

    Treasured, you post your boobs and I’ll post my legs and we can morph into one woman and reduce the confusion. πŸ˜‰

  137. Treasured says:

    Exotic-thank you:) I adore my 2 boys!

    Dorky, it was my Daddy who blew it:P

    I think there is some sort of trend people constantly mixing what I and Spicy said πŸ˜€

  138. DorkyGuy says:

    ” in his words he β€œblew it”..”

    Being in a third world country, there is a 38% chance he was referring to a tranny

  139. Exotic SB says:

    @Onyx ~ Ouch! You need to take a break and get a massage this weekend πŸ˜‰

  140. onyx_percula says:

    OK make that 13 scams busted as of tonight… humm wonder if I can hit 20 before the weekend is up… sad state of affairs it is.

    GL Spicey!

    Night ladies

  141. SugarySpicey says:

    Yeah, Sweetie – he still hasn’t sealed the deal, but maybe one of these days. πŸ˜‰

  142. Exotic SB says:

    @Treasured ~ happy birthday to your angel :) Six is a VERY sweet age!

    @Sweetie ~ nite, nite!

    @Spicey ~ Adventure makes sense. Something I have learned over the years…it’s ALL about the experience!

  143. sweetie says:

    Hello, Exotic and Beach! I’m going to bed, lovely night, everyone.

  144. Treasured says:

    Spicey, as a future doc I can say 100% judging by your symptoms, you suffer from a common infection -in love πŸ˜€
    Hence the over sensitivness to ordinary things.

    Chill and enjoy Bali. Don’t over think.

    Threesomes: hate them too. Been there, done that. Will not exclude them, but not something I enjoy.
    By the way, never thought I’ll be happy that there are online men magazines: daddy has been researching the subject and said sorry to me, as in his words he “blew it”..

    AND! My baby is 6 today! Being a mum is incomparable to anything in the world!!!

  145. Beach_Girl says:

    Spicey is cunny, principium?

  146. Beach_Girl says:

    Exotic~ Here!!! πŸ˜€

    Spicey~ talking to cunny????

  147. SugarySpicey says:

    Just talking to Cunny and thought: to me, Sugar = Adventure. Maybe, it’s the adventure I want?

  148. Exotic SB says:

    @Spicey ~ be aware, but enjoy Bali!!!

    @Beach & Sweetie ~ Hello sugars!

    Anyone else on the blog right now?

  149. sweetie says:

    Spicey, not to sound like a party pooper, but a guy who says he likes you doesn’t make you go through hell just as a joke. Be ready for anything.

  150. Beach_Girl says:

    Spicey~ Bali!!!!Woo hooo enjoy it and have a nice sunny drink for me in the sun πŸ˜€ lucky girl!

  151. TaylorMadeSB says:

    I posted in the wrong topic

    I have taken a much needed break from the sugar lifestyle and now that I have made the big move from the south to the West Coast, I think this will be a good time to explore this lifestyle once again.I wonder what the sugar will be like around this area? Hopefully it’ll live up to the rumored

  152. SugarySpicey says:

    Dorky – thanks, now today he’s been super sweet. All the Ex Pats from his office went out to a bar/brothel and he stayed in, Skyped with me, and worked through a ticketing issue I’d been having with my flights to Bali.

    This is the struggle, as soon as I get completely fed up he turns around and does something sweet. It’s like he has a second sense of when he’s pushed me too far and needs to back off.

    Oh, and I learned that he’s been completely celibate in the month he’s been gone, regardless of the jokes. I guess I knew that, he messages and Skypes with me so often he wouldn’t have much time for carousing.

    Men! Can’t live with them, and they complain when you lock them in your trunk.

  153. SugarySpicey says:

    Threesomes = hate ’em, I want all the attention and all the orgasms to myself.

  154. DorkyGuy says:

    @gtt_envy~ regardless of whether the sex lives up to expectations, there is something pretty cool about a girl that is secure enough and cares enough about you to invite another girl in, just because she thinks you will like it. My marriage taught me to really value a woman who is secure, thoughtful, and generous… all of which are represented in spades in the gesture. This scenario has never played out for me, but if it did, I am sure that it would raise my opinion of the girl considerably, even if the sex totally sucked!

  155. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars πŸ˜€

    Treasured ~ I would have to say it’s not all about sex, if she was getting married for the 6th time… could be a clue!!! Also, you can be hot and be a dumb ass… just saying Normal looking for some is hot!!! just saying

    gtt_envy~ Completely agree, connection and open with the right person can be amazing!

  156. gtt_envy says:

    @dorky, 3 ways are WAY overrated!! I’ve done it FFM and MMF and it was a experience, but nothing I would want to make a habit.

    Connection and being open with one person is far for fun you just have to find the right person.

  157. Treasured says:

    Well, boys. It obviously works.

    I will never forget an educational conversation I once had with a charming wealthy lady in Cannes. Her sister was getting married for the 6th time with a wealthy man 10 years her junior. The mentioned sister, according to photos, is well… pretty ordinary.
    That puzzeled me. So I asked the obvious question: “How does she do it?”
    The lady looked at me, as if I just asked if her Dior handbag is a fake, and answered in the most charming accent: “SEX! Through verrryy gooood sex, my dear.”

    I’d say, a priceless lesson πŸ˜‰

  158. DorkyGuy says:

    @Guru, LOL~ If my GF hired an escort for a three-way, I might end up professing my love too.

  159. GenuineSD says:

    @Treasured. I couldn’t agree more

  160. Treasured says:

    Oh, Dorky πŸ˜€ You are so dorkily conservative πŸ˜€
    Next thing you will say is that rimming is fast track to hell πŸ˜›

  161. DorkyGuy says:

    I watched the Amityville Horror. When blood starts oozing out of the front door, you don’t go in through the front door. Either you go in through the back, or stay the hell away!

  162. Treasured says:

    Ok, nothing works as well as killing the sex drive as studying biochemistry. πŸ˜€ Fuck, what did I get myself into? πŸ˜€

  163. Treasured says:

    Onyx, it is definitely NOT bad, if you choose wisely πŸ˜‰

    And, by the way…. Now I need sex πŸ˜€ And it is very unfortunate that me and Daddy live in a different countries! Booohooo :(

  164. onyx_percula says:

    @ Treasured — stop you are going to make me blush! Yes she is in LA today doing her audition for Playboy in about 90 minutes. They did make a good pick to audition, GND (girl next door) looks, incredible cleavage and a Y to die for! Not too mention, other than her issues with sugar arrangements, she really has her shit together. If she gets the gig I will have to share (or is it brag, lol).

    Oh you mention scent, that is something I LOVE about that time of month in most women (not talking about the scent down there). A women’s scent almost always changes and most times for the better! One of my SBs gets this really great vanilla and cinnamon scent mixed in with her hint of musk. It’s just hot as hell! Ladies a tip, unless your man’s nose isn’t working right seriously back off the artificial scents, your natural scent is so much better than anything out of a bottle its not funny. Stay clean, fresh and just let it hang out there, you might be surprised by the compliments you get πŸ˜‰

    Ladies, I know its a bit unusual for a man to truly be interested in discovering every aspect of a woman’s sexuality, but is it really that bad out there? You would think that by the time most men are in the sugar daddy age range they would have learned that investing the time and effort is very worth it.

  165. onyx_percula says:

    A thought comes to mind thinking about marriage versus sugar arrangements. I think sugar arrangements can be, maybe even tend to be more honest. I think being in a finite arrangement rather an end is implied or stated, combined with a general understanding that once its over, future contact will be discrete if it happens at all. So there is some safety in being honest as its unlikely to come back to hurt you. It’s like Spicey pointed out, its really a super small chance a twenty something SB is ever going to marry and stay married to a man twice+ her age, who will be dead and buried before she hits menopause.

    I could site a few examples where I was aware of things about a woman that she would NEVER tell a husband.

  166. Treasured says:

    Genuine…. Well, I can only tell you that the same goes for a woman;)
    If one enjoys (REALLY) enjoys sex, as to get a kick out of it, out of smell, taste, everything… She will enjoy it during ANY time of the month πŸ˜‰

  167. Treasured says:

    Girls, Onyx is a catch πŸ˜€

    I have discovered, that the more uninhibited the man is, the more open minded he is, the better lover he is πŸ˜‰

    Sorry, about your girl, Onyx. Looks like it wasn’t her first time after all…
    Oh well, at least, from what I understood, you enjoyed Playboy material Y πŸ˜€
    Or was the Playboy girls someone else?

  168. GenuineSD says:

    @Treasured. And the corollary question: are there any SBs that enjoy intimacy regardless?

    What are your thoughts?

  169. onyx_percula says:

    Off topic — What a week on the sugar sites! I have “busted” 11 scams as of this morning. Man these people are just stupid, it really makes me wonder if they are getting anything out of these scams for the amount of time they are willing to invest. Who knows maybe they are some place that $50 is a great deal of money. Between the pics that are stolen from some girl for the internet or the piss poor grammar or the immediate request to take communications private, it makes me wonder if they get anyone to fork over money.

  170. onyx_percula says:

    @ Treasured — ref “anytime of the month”. Yes to a point. As I mentioned before I do worship at the alter of the Y… However I have no desire to ingest (which is going to happen rather you intend to or not) anything during that time of the month. However many of the woman I have been with their flow stops when they get wet, like a bath, shower or swimming. Which makes for a great time for shower sex. IME most woman have more intense O’s around that time too, either right before, during or right after. Some seem to go into over-sex-drive then too. So I guess to sum it up, its not a bad thing in my book, unlike many guys who I have it referred to as the “monthly vacation”.

  171. DorkyGuy says:

    @SA Staff~ Just FYI… If you navigate to the blog after you are logged into SA, and are in the HTTPS SSL context, a bunch of your blog assets are blocked from displaying in the browser because they use non-SSL HTTP paths.

  172. DorkyGuy says:

    Just catching up on the last blog…

    @Spicy~ I am really sorry to hear how things are going. Genuinely, best of luck to you in that. It sounds like it sucks.

    @Treasured~
    “There is no thing as NSA RELATIONSHIP. It is like a β€œLow calorie chocolate cake” or β€œA little bit pregnant” or my latest favourite, from a shop assistant in Turkey β€œAn authentic Turkish Chanel” πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

    It is either NSA, or a relationship. But never combined. And… From experience… A SB/SD arrangement, if it is a good one, always is a relationship and not an NSA.”

    Others can argue about whether or not NSA is possible. Regardless of its accuracy, I find this to be a very nice and refreshing thing to say.

  173. Treasured says:

    LOL!

    Talking about periods…..
    Any SD on board enjoys pussy in any stage of the month?

    Just curious πŸ˜€

  174. DorkyGuy says:

    eeeew! At least it was in the perfume, not a love potion you snuck into his drink.

    I have decided not to put ketchup on my eggs this morning

  175. Treasured says:

    Dorky – that would be too kinky even for me πŸ˜€

    By the way, do you know, that in olden days, one of the most potent witchcraft potions, was to add a few drops of menstrual blood to the perfume…
    Hrumpft. Anyone want to try and give reviews :D?

  176. DorkyGuy says:

    Scent is powerful. If you want to screw with a guy’s head, have sex with him while wearing his best friend’s cologne!

  177. Treasured says:

    Dorky…. I know. And it burdens me greatly: “Be responsible for those you have tamed…”
    Just can’t help it. Happens again and again and again πŸ˜€

    I blame it on my pheromones πŸ˜€

  178. DorkyGuy says:

    “Groupthink is not science” πŸ˜›

    So your secret power is that you make men fall in love? With great power comes great responsibility!

  179. Treasured says:

    Nevertheless, almost ALL SDs I have been sooner or later start talking about marriage and babies…
    Weird πŸ˜€

    Hey, guys, can please someone SUM UP, in less that a book, the fight between Dorky and Amorito?? πŸ˜€

  180. Beach_Girl says:

    Spicy~ what line? i’m so confused lol… it’s late here πŸ˜€

  181. SugarySpicey says:

    Well, that is great Beachy.

    (I do still think the line is cheesy though πŸ˜‰ )

  182. Beach_Girl says:

    Spicey~ I know one sugar that is engaged now to her SD.. how awesome for her!

  183. Beach_Girl says:

    Not sure this article isn’t all that, marriage will end in divorce? No, people don’t want to make the necessary adjustments to make their marriage last.
    We live in a throw away society, no one wants to fix anything, they want to change, get the new gadget, the new model it’s the same with relationships…

    As for sugar, it’s a great way to experience new things, Share and give and receive .. I think the self life is what you want it to be… depends how flexible both parties are…

  184. Zack says:

    1/.0005=2000… 1/1,000,000=.0001%. I’m just saying…

  185. SugarySpicey says:

    Ridiculous closing line, try an arrangement and see if it leads to marriage. I cannot imagine that more than .05% of arrangements even have the possibility of turning into marriage.

    He’s 60, divorced three times, she’s a 22 year-old Thai grad student, now they live in the suburbs with four kids.

    As if! Lol

  186. Zack says:

    Lol, model marriage!

  187. Zack says:

    The best of marriage in a microcosm? Hmm, interesting.

  188. GenuineSD says:

    Arrangements have a shelf life. Because they don’t last forever, the time and experiences are more intense…

  189. Zack says:

    Oh great, is this going to come down to more than, “Keep your options open?”

  190. GenuineSD says:

    First! Wow….

  191. Leroy says:

    All personalities and perspectives are welcome in the blog, while personal attacks and name calling are not. It’s inevitable that there will be disagreements but let’s handle it as mature adults with class to keep the dialog constructive and respectful. Please refer to the β€œBlog Etiquette” for more details. For the newbies, please take a look at the β€œSugar Daddy Dating Tips” section on the right for a list of commonly discussed topics and the β€œSD and SB Blog List” section to see the perspective of other sugars. Now comment away and let’s enjoy the blog…

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