5 years ago
College Made Easy: Just Add Sugar

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Women venture into the Sugar Bowl for a variety of reasons. In turn, there are many benefits or rewards to Sugaring. What girl doesn’t love having nice things? Unfortunately, some of us can’t afford all the luxuries we love to indulge, which is why we indulge in the Sugar Lifestyle. How many of you ladies were in the Sugar Bowl during college?

Ah, college, a time to explore. A time to meet new people. A time to sacrifice luxuries until you get that degree—or is it? As we know, many female college students are turning to Sugaring to not only pay for college, but allow them a life of luxury that other girls their age dream of.

We’ve seen more and more Sugar Babies reporting a debt free graduation thanks to their Sugar Daddies. About 52% of college SBs graduate debt-free every year; however, this year, that number jumped by 15% in 2011 to 67% in 2012.

The colleges with the most Sugar Babies graduating debt free.

1.       New York University

2.       Temple University

3.       Georgia State University

4.       Kent State University (Ohio)

5.       Arizona State University

6.       University of Georgia

7.       University of Houston

8.       Florida State University

9.       University of Wisconsin, Milwaukee

10.   University of South Florida

11.   Michigan State University

12.   Alabama University

13.   Tulane University

14.   Penn State University

15.   Ohio University

Sugar is not only limited to money and gifts. Aside from financial assistance, Sugar Babies can benefit through mentor-ship and networking. Now, what girl doesn’t love getting all dolled up for a classy event?

Were you a Sugar Baby during college?

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444 Responses to “College Made Easy: Just Add Sugar”

  1. James Johnson says:

    Well I have just started being a SB(1st week in)…Yes guys can be SB’s too. .But I have been on the website seekingarrangment.com and I must say I have seen a lot of SD/SM on the site, Many don’t have pictures and that’s hard cause I have a pic. The first night I set up my profile and got my pic approved I got an email from a then Pot.SD and we have been texting and talking on the phone and I should be going to meet him by next week, due to his travels this week. I’m not sure how to approach getting the 10k I need. He already told me “of course I will give you money but I haven’t given him the number amount because I am afraid, he will think that’s asking a lot seeing as we just met. He wants to fly me to his state and give me spending money and even put me in a hotel so I don’t feel like I have to do anything with him, spend a weekend together and informed me money isn’t an issue “at all” for him. So should I go for it and ask for the college tuition money The other issue is Even though I understand I cannot rush the process too much, I need the cash a.s.a.p. And what the reason might be that more people aren’t writing me back after they view my profile.? I want to continue this but the waiting around for POT’S to reply is kind of making me loose my enthusiasm about this, I really wanted a SM but settled for a SD because, he is really genuinely nice and we get along great…so far :).. someone please who is experienced let me know some more tips, I have been doing all of my research from google.com to youtube.com and I want to do this. I need some advice, tips etc. Also I don’t have a car so It would be hard trying to get to a Airport, so is it too much to ask him for transportation to the airport, like a driver or a taxi. Am I thinking too much into stuff.? Help!

  2. Rosie says:

    @lil_tm

    That’s what I always thought too, that 10 is really early and that’s why (for whatever reason), I felt shame for it. I didn’t grow up in a highly religious family at all, but instinctively I felt it was wrong. Lol at “pulling a Sharon Stone”.

    Re: Contact

    I had SDs who told me after a weeks into the arrangement that they would enjoy a little more contact and I had SDs who really liked the “my life, your life” method better. I think it all depends on the person and their current life situation. I can see a married SD wanting to keep “chit chat” to when you’re together.

  3. lil_tm says:

    Ok, ladies and jellyspoons..I have a question.

    Ladies: Considering the dynamic of this sort of relationship, do you contact your SD to chit chat about unimportant things or do you wait for him to reach out to you?

    Gents: Do you hope SB doesn’t contact you and bother you with unimportant B.S and you can call on her when you desire or do you hope she will say hello every once in a while?

  4. lil_tm says:

    @ Prince
    If you’re talkin’ to me, I only speak Cajun French, cher. 😀 (from behind??)

    @ Rosie and Jersey-Ya’ll got started early. I hadn’t even started pulling a Sharon Stone yet at that age. :/

    @ Spicey. You’ll know when Aunt Flo comes to visit. She always brings her hormones with her. 😉

  5. SugarySpicey says:

    There’s also a difference between touching and masturbating. Probably as a young child it was touching and exploring, not masturbating – and probably everyone was doing that. Libido is directly correlated to testosterone levels which don’t increase until puberty. I am guessing one who goes through puberty early also begins masturbating early.

    I’m hoping puberty will hit next month and I’ll start masturbating like a fiend. Until then, it’s just touching.

  6. Rosie says:

    Not even sure the age one begins to masturbate is even directly correlated to current libido at all. I recall masturbating at 10 and being aware of what I was doing and I now have a voracious sex drive.

  7. Principium says:

    Pardon me Miss as my Latin may have been somewhat “rusty” so let’s try French, shall we?

    L: à l’arrière

  8. Jersey Darling says:

    Wow, I’ve been going at it for as long as I can consciously remember. At 7 I remember I’d already been doing it for a while…

    Hmm, figured that was more common. Maybe that explains why I enjoy going 14 times in one night, I’m insatiable!

  9. lil_tm says:

    @Prince
    Ab Tergo? Forgive my stupidity, but I have no idea what that means and google isn’t helping. :(

    @Spice
    Re: Clenching Vagina…Pics or it didn’t happen! 😉
    Re: New blog post
    I was raised in a Catholic home and went to Catholic school. We are taught that sex before marriage is a sin and that having sex without the intention of bearing a child is a sin. Oh, and contraception is a sin.
    And I say the same thing now as I did back then to my sex ed teachers. Why did God give us the pleasure button if we aren’t supposed to use it? Wouldn’t it be some sort of sick joke to give someone a button and if they press it, they feel bliss, but if they press it they are also supposed to feel guilty about it?? Come on now. But, I’ll shut up now because I could go on about this one forever…

    @Fatty
    I’m no homewrecker, so I’ll leave that one alone. 😉

    @Jersey
    I believe 10 years is pretty young. I didn’t get the urge until I hit puberty…12 or 12ish?

  10. SugarySpicey says:

    P.S. – Hey you! Dr. Blog lurker, it’s totally not nice not to disclose that you’re reading all my inner blog thoughts while messaging me IRL. You are on timeout! You might need a cucky cage now too! :(

  11. rukidding says:

    So…is there any possibility of establishing a sexless arrangement with an SD? I’m not into sex. Or anything that would fall under the category of sexual. At all. I think there can be other (better) ways to benefit each other. Call me crazy, but money >>>>>>>> sexual activity. Just saying.

  12. SugarySpicey says:

    Rosie – Oh yeah, she was out of there so fast her head was spinning.

  13. Jersey Darling says:

    Masturbating at 10 is young?

    I’ve been doing it since I was in diapers. Really, my parents have stories. Very high sex drive!

  14. Rosie says:

    @Spicey

    Omg. I hope the nanny was fired!! I thought masturbating at 10 was young!

  15. SugarySpicey says:

    Rosie – they had no choice, the jokes were really inappropriate and I had no context for understanding why they were funny and/or why I couldn’t use the punch lines. All the child rearing books advise to answer the questions your kids ask, the books just aren’t written for situations like that. Some people shouldn’t be allowed around children!

  16. Rosie says:

    You and ME both, flyr!!

  17. flyr says:

    Just waiting for the DB discussion to dry up and drop out of sight……….. aaagh

  18. Rosie says:

    @Spicey

    Just read your latest blog post. You learned porno jokes when you were three and then your parents taught you about the birds and the bees then too?

    😯 😯 😯

  19. FatBastardSD says:

    @lil_tm

    Ah, I should have looked it up first!

    Age? Age is only a number, I am still young at heart.
    Sex? All man. Too much of a man according to my SB (but she may have ment that in terms of weight).
    Location? Anywhere I can lie on my back and is well light so I can read.

    Don’t let this opportunity pass you by!

  20. FatBastardSD says:

    @lil_tm

    Based on the site we are on I will assume you are asking about:

    allowance? negotiable
    sexual relationship expected? No I am on SA looking for a platonic friend.
    length of arrangement? As long as you believe my “your allowance check is in the mail” routine.

  21. SugarySpicey says:

    And, again, Capitol P, you make my vagina clench.

  22. Principium says:

    A: Old enough!
    S: Sure, why not!
    L: Ab Tergo!
    😀

  23. lil_tm says:

    Happy International Clitoris Awareness week! Yah!! May 5th -May 12th.
    Sad thing it’s under “Weird News” on huffingtonpost and why is it only a week.Pfft!”

    Because it’s awareness week, does this mean all penii have to stand at attention? Oh wait, that’s all the time.

    http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ_Vwffxp1HPd-W_7U1M3bRJ6VV253OBivcAIH5xdlKIbUtz-Nc

  24. lil_tm says:

    “TM – I was laughing so hard, tears were running down my face as I read it.”

    Yea, last nights sh*t show was pretty funny!

    “@lil_tm
    We could play the prosecution and defense in the case of the dangling dingleberry in a made for TV movie. Of course in the movie you would be humping me right now…”

    a/s/l ?
    😉

  25. SugarySpicey says:

    Fati – I don’t buy it for a second. We both know what you’re into. You carry a vagina sucker in your pocket ’cause you just can’t lick enough.

  26. FatBastardSD says:

    @DianaSBinOC, @SugarySpicey

    You need to attack the problem from both ends like they do with illegal drug education. Knowing the effects of drug use is one thing but you also need help resisting peer pressure to try it.

    That’s why I hope they have a “Just say no to the Clitoris” element in the International Clitoris Awareness mandate.

  27. SugarySpicey says:

    Diana ^ that is odd indeed. Perhaps because it takes a week for a man to properly identify it on a new partner. Capitol P, wanna see if we can beat that average?

  28. DianaSBinOC says:

    Happy International Clitoris Awareness week! Yah!! May 5th -May 12th.

    Sad thing it’s under “Weird News” on huffingtonpost and why is it only a week.Pfft!

  29. Principium says:

    @ Pricey Spicey: “I thought my feederism fetish was a secret just between us.”

    I refuse to be anchored down!

  30. Rosie says:

    @Principal

    Lol. Interesting. I emailed Huffy too and the only thing he came back with was that statistically, 2 out of 1 people are siamese twins.

  31. Principium says:

    @ Wosie: I emailed Darrell Huff and he told me that was incorrect!

    In fact, 100% of Siamese Twins are obligated to be present in a Ménage à Trois setting 😉

  32. Rosie says:

    @FatBastard

    Statistics show that most Siamese twins are up for a threesome.

  33. FatBastardSD says:

    @Principium

    Thanks!

  34. FatBastardSD says:

    @All

    From the FatBastardSD book club comes this week’s selection:

    How to Lie with Statistics by Darrell Huff. A good book to read for the layman as more and more regulations that control our lives are presented through statistical arguments.

  35. Principium says:

    FBSD: The Dark Lord of Darkness 😉 You Sir, have that Dark Triad thingie down pat! A tip of my hat to you Sire.

  36. FatBastardSD says:

    I have been missing out on too many conversations here!

    @SugarySpicey

    I am only presenting my case in the defense of Steve. In the end only the Blog Jury can decide.

    @Principium

    “Most likely, sites such as this one will just die off from eventually becoming old, tired and obsolete.”

    Replace “sites” with “SD’s” and “this one” with “FatBastardSD” and you will make many blog SB’s happy!

    @lil_tm

    We could play the prosecution and defense in the case of the dangling dingleberry in a made for TV movie. Of course in the movie you would be humping me right now…

    @Rosie

    “It’s pretty amazing that NYU is at the top of the list for SBs leaving college DEBT-FREE”

    How to lie with statistics! A more informative table would have listed the total number of SB’s surveyed with breakdown of SB’s per alma matter and the % of those in each alma matter graduating debt free. But even such a table is useless without knowing the prior financial/scholarship situation of each SB.

    Why not just provide self reported allowance numbers for each geographic region (which has already been done)? Because it is too easy to call bullshit of these kinds of numbers when everyone reading them knows that the SD profiles on the SA site do not reflect the claimed allowance numbers.

  37. SugarySpicey says:

    TM – I was laughing so hard, tears were running down my face as I read it.

  38. lil_tm says:

    Hayzeus, did I really write that??

    That, my friends, is what sleep deprivation, p90x exhaustion and two glasses wine will do to you. lol.

  39. SugarySpicey says:

    FatiB – After many hours of mulling over the DB incident I am of the mind that it came not from haphazard wiping, but a Poot that Steve* did not realize had given more than he bargained for. I say this, because Steve had ordered Broccoli with his dinner that evening, it was a rather lengthy meal, and you know the effects said vegetable can have on a man’s digestive system.

  40. SugarySpicey says:

    Capitol P –

    I thought my feederism fetish was a secret just between us.

  41. Rosie says:

    “Most likely, sites such as this one will just die off from eventually becoming old, tired and obsolete.” -Principium

    I do agree with this statement. I’m wondering if the purpose of the SA parties are an attempt to test the possible success of ‘face to face’ meetups as traditional dating sites are losing business to companies like Meeting Network, Shaker, Banjo and Highlight? Hmmmm…..

  42. sweetie says:

    P “Most likely, sites such as this one will just die off from eventually becoming old, tired and obsolete.”
    I hope they don’t die off, but clean up a bit and finally live up to their titles.

  43. sweetie says:

    Not feeling particularly tolerant these days… not good.

  44. sweetie says:

    P, that’s fine. A different sugardaddying website has that and it felt great to annihilate someone’s outrageous idiocy. Not looking for the love of my life, only for a common sense, dignified man. Sadly, some of the people on SA have no idea what they’re actually writing in their profiles. I’d volunteer for the profile police 😉

  45. Principium says:

    @ Sweetie: “I wish SA had a way to vote on profiles. I’d strike down so many… good riddance! This site sure needs some screening.”

    It will most likely not happen on this site for the obvious commercial & economical suicidal reasons. In fact the hook on this site has always been that the ratio of SBs to SDs is something like 10:1. Of course we know that these are purely misleading and based on over all memberships and NOT actual active members.

    Ever wondered as to why there are not too many homosexual or gay members on these type of sites? Well, the gays are far less inhibited and far more adventurous (may gays play the Sugar game and I dare to say, higher numbers based on pure percentiles). They have been ahead of the curve in terms of technology and they have had Apps for meeting up people. An App which took off from the gay community and has started to gain footing in the hetro community (albeit mostly within the younger and the hipper generation) is called Tinder (check it out)

    Most likely, sites such as this one will just die off from eventually becoming old, tired and obsolete.

  46. Rosie says:

    Feederism and feces. What next? Forniphilia?

  47. sweetie says:

    I wish SA had a way to vote on profiles. I’d strike down so many… good riddance! This site sure needs some screening.

  48. Principium says:

    It’s a very unhealthy fetish Sweetie. I was literally floored when I watched it but looking forward to reading it on Spicey’s new blog topic:

    How I gained 200 lbs for my feederist SD Steve, and then slimmed down to 120 lbs within a fortnight 😛

  49. sweetie says:

    Gross, P! Why would anyone do that? Food is a necessity, after all.

  50. sweetie says:

    Then I’m hopeless, P!

  51. Principium says:

    *feederism. I watched a very disturbing program on this:

    An African-American male and a White female as a couple. The fetish was that the guy force feeds the woman who also fed herself very well in order for her to reach an impossible weight of 1000 lbs (I sheet you not!) She was already in the 400-500 range! Oh the sexual fetish: the more layers of fat the better for him to get her into the shower and wash underneath every layer and every crevice.

    Spicey: wanna be my feederist Sub?

  52. Principium says:

    For those who can smuggle PB&J sani’s under their left breasts 😉

    Hey Sweetie, the only good ones are on this blog (but inactive on SA) and we get photos of BBW who are into fooderism ^.!.^

  53. sweetie says:

    Is the SA SD pool getting smaller? Nothing promising at the moment… and I’m on the prowl. Can’t wait to check out the scene in second city!

  54. Rosie says:

    I don’t care what we talk about, but scatological humor is just not my cup ‘o tea. (cup ‘o poo?) 😐

  55. SugarySpicey says:

    Ladies and gentlemen of the court, your Dingleberry awaits.

  56. The great dingleberry infographic is live, for your viewing pleasure.

  57. lil_tm says:

    Just makes it more obvious that I am really just a tomboy. But now I guess we should go back to discussing the more meaningful things in life…
    Handbags, stilletos, allowances, and vacations in paradise. 😉

  58. lil_tm says:

    “Unlikely, Notice that Spicey made no mention of said bunghole being soiled in any way. We cannot assume she did this to protect Steven as she has openly discussed the dingleberry. Thus we must conclude that said anus was pristine in it’s cleanliness. Now I ask you what are the odds that one can wipe ones ass to a pristine condition and still manage to leave a solitary dingleberry?
    Not plausible at all. The house of cards is collapsing.”

    So you are proposing that the story is a complete facade and there was no Steven, no shit, and no strategic placement of the envolope of cash into her handbag?

    Be that as it may, the story is quite entertaining.

    LOL..everytime I think of a ricocheting garbanzo dingleberry, I will have a brighter day because it makes me laugh!! 😀

  59. DianaSBinOC says:

    ^ Why would anyone assume she inspected his ass. Seriously Fat Bastard how easily is it to see under mounds of flesh plus hairy balls dangling in the way? Wow I think I’ll stick to lotions and hand over hand with using an excuse of “I have a toothache”.

    The sugar bowl never fails to turn my stomach. Gross.

  60. I have no recollection as to the cleanliness of said bunghole. I can neither support nor deny the claim that the DB-Manufacturing facility was kept at standard and acceptable levels of hygiene.

  61. FatBastardSD says:

    @lil_tm

    Unlikely, Notice that Spicey made no mention of said bunghole being soiled in any way. We cannot assume she did this to protect Steven as she has openly discussed the dingleberry. Thus we must conclude that said anus was pristine in it’s cleanliness. Now I ask you what are the odds that one can wipe ones ass to a pristine condition and still manage to leave a solitary dingleberry?

    Not plausible at all. The house of cards is collapsing.

  62. Rosie says:

    To answer the blog question:

    “Were you a Sugar Baby during college?”

    No, I was not a SB then. Although my bf through most of those years was 9 years older and I lived with him, he didn’t pay my tuition and I worked all through college. But a few years later, I ventured into the sugar world and that did help me pay off some college debt remaining, continue my learning through specialized certifications and start my own business.

    It’s pretty amazing that NYU is at the top of the list for SBs leaving college DEBT-FREE.

    Tuition and fees for NYU per year:
    (two semesters full-time) $36,516
    Room and board $11,780
    Books and supplies $700
    Personal expenses $1,000 (I think far exceed this, but this is what they have listed on the site!)

    Total budget: $49,996

  63. Principium says:

    What a lucid and effortless transformation from the discussion of SBs being taken advantage of for a mere $200 (yesterday eve) to chocolate covered berries/edamame/garbanzo beans apéritif & delicacies. You are correct FB my crass brethren, indeed a wealth of writer’s material in here. Even the Lil_One is getting into the act 😉

  64. Tears! Tears are running down my face, and I actually just gutted about a tablespoon of heave bile. TM, BRAVO!!! Perfection.

  65. Rosie says:

    *touch hummus (damn this site for no editing options!)

  66. Rosie says:

    @lil_tm

    I probably won’t ever tough hummus again! 😕 Lol! But I do give you and FattyBooBoo A+ on your imaginations/story-writing skill. 😆

  67. lil_tm says:

    “I, for one, DO NOT want an infographic of a shit ball hanging from an ass hair.”

    I can’t say that I would mind it all that much. 😉

  68. lil_tm says:

    Ladies and Gentlemen of the Jury..If I may be so bold?

    You claim that Steven was sitting at the edge of the bed when you first noticed said dingleberry and I quote “dangling from him precariously”. Members of the blog I ask you to consider where said dingleberry was hanging from. If Steven was sitting on the edge of the bed as SugarySpicey claims, we can assume that his buttocks were in contact with the bed, from which it follows that his anal hair would not be visible. This leaves only one possible explanation. Said dingleberry was hanging off of the public hair attached to his scrotum. How did said dingleberry find itself in this position? Common convention when wiping ones ass is to move in a front to back motion, “

    It is obvious that Spicey’s experienced hands pushed Steven’s knees back as he laid back on his elbows waiting for her to feed him grapes, and in doing so, exposed his bunghole.

    Then, she deftly held up his mansack in order pleasure this gentle area. In doing so, she received more than she bargained for when she noticed what appeared to be Aaron Neville’s forehead mole protruding from his nether region.
    She realized she didn’t have to worry about it being a cancerous growth when the tiny cilia in her nostrils started to catch fire from the smell of Steven’s lunch the previous day.

    So, Ladies and Gentlemen, this is not a case of the ricocheting garbanzo dingleberry, but a case of a man who was too cheap and too careless to clean his booty before partaking in some hanky panky.

    Hummus anyone?

  69. Rosie says:

    I, for one, DO NOT want an infographic of a shit ball hanging from an ass hair. 😳

  70. SugarySpicey says:

    Well Fati- then you’ll have endless content once I start publishing the dirty stuff. My infography will be pushed to the limits.

  71. FatBastardSD says:

    @Principium

    I have great material to work with! This blog is FANTASTIC!

  72. Jersey Darling says:

    Eww I just googled the image – hahaha…

    This should be a good infographic!

  73. Jersey Darling says:

    *gag*

  74. SugarySpicey says:

    Thanks CP – GIS wasn’t turning up the right-sized DB image, I’ll Google Trader J’s chocolate edamame.

  75. Principium says:

    *Dark!

  76. Principium says:

    Trader Joe’s (the grocery store, not the SA blogger Trader J) sells daek chocolate covered edamame beans. Why not organic chocolate covered chick-peas? I think FB is onto something genius in here. Ha!

  77. SugarySpicey says:

    I am actually lolling right now! In between shudders of horrifying revulsion. We now see that Jersey is our closet kinkster who loves a good DB.

    Photoshop booting up, we’ll see what I can do.

  78. Jersey Darling says:

    Spicey, I vote for infographic. Please!

  79. Principium says:

    FB must a an attorney working in tech. You are a very funny MoFo. Cheers Sire.

  80. SugarySpicey says:

    FatiB – in order to save others from the horror of the moment I did not go into great detail. But, if you would like, I can create an infographic expressing the exact size and position?

    He was in fact, leaning back on his elbows, his knees over the side of the bed. His anus probably six inches from the edge. The DB was close to the rim, but drifting toward to the highest hanging set of testicles I have ever seen. It was entwined in aforementioned anal hair, and I had an “unobstructed view” from my position.

    Side note: I prefer to approach the peni from below, resting it against the roof of my mouth so that it can gently glide against my soft pallet and deep into my throat without triggering the gag reflex which said DB aggravated.

    Would you like the infographic so we can explore this delightful memory more fully?

  81. Jersey Darling says:

    I think I just died…

    loooolllllllll!

  82. FatBastardSD says:

    @SugarySpicey

    Well I would never make nasty comments out of the blue, but since you brought it up let’s look at this story more closely shall we :-).

    “Steven had taken off his pants and was sitting at the edge of the bed…

    A pebble. I had to look closely as at first it looked like a growth. It was about the size of the tip of my pinky and dangling from him precariously…”

    You claim that Steven was sitting at the edge of the bed when you first noticed said dingleberry and I quote “dangling from him precariously”. Members of the blog I ask you to consider where said dingleberry was hanging from. If Steven was sitting on the edge of the bed as SugarySpicey claims, we can assume that his buttocks were in contact with the bed, from which it follows that his anal hair would not be visible. This leaves only one possible explanation. Said dingleberry was hanging off of the public hair attached to his scrotum. How did said dingleberry find itself in this position? Common convention when wiping ones ass is to move in a front to back motion, please see exhibit 1 [\img]http://www.howtowipeyourbutt.com/[\img].

    Using the front to back motion it would be impossible for said dingleberry to become affixed to the scrotal pubic hair during the ass wiping phase. This can only lead to the conclusion that said “Lee Harvey Oswald” dingleberry ricocheted of some toilet surface and affixed itself to the pubic hair on the scrotum. Assuming this chain of events we still have to question what consistancy of dingleberry could both ricochet of a surface and affix itself to pubic hair. The only possible conclusion was that said dingleberry was composed of a hard inner substance (most likely an undigested chick pea) coated with fecal matter. After showering SugarySpicey claims she saw no further evidence of said dingleberry. How could this be possible under the chick pea dingleberry hypothesis?

    Members of the blog, I rest my case.

  83. SugarySpicey says:

    What else can I do but laugh… well and poke fun at him for being a disgusting human being? Give me a clean Subby over that shit anyday (no pun intended).

  84. lil_tm says:

    Has everyone heard about this guy in Cleveland that kidnapped three girls over a decade ago and has been holding them hostage ever since?

    Here’s a YT vid of the neighbor that found them. He kinda reminds me of Sweet Brown’s long lost fraternal twin?

    When he says, “I knew something was wrong when a little pretty white girl ran into a black mans arms!”

    hahahahaha!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gcLSI3oyqhs

  85. lil_tm says:

    “TM – I replay that conversation/horror story occasionally and there are soooo many things I wish I had said. Gross! Gross! Gross! I just gagged again reading “turtle head” NOT glamorous!”

    In all seriousness, I would have run out of there like a bat outta hell as well. And it’s easy for me to laugh at because 1. I have a sick sense of humor and 2. I wasn’t up close and personal with a turd.

  86. DianaSBinOC says:

    ^ I read it and eww. How can someone not feel that especially walking off to the shower? Smudging sheets? wtf? He didn’t notice that when he stood up? Gross.

  87. SugarySpicey says:

    Diana – I shared one of my horrifying sugar moments. You may not want to read this. I wish I could erase it from my memory. But, Fati thinks I only post bullshit self-aggrandizement that promotes unreal sugar expectations (like orgasms). So, I thought I’d share a really bad element of sugar too: sugarmytips.wordpress.com/2013/05/05/sometimes-in-sugar-dating-you-have-to-put-up-with-a-little-shit/

  88. DianaSBinOC says:

    Whoops meant to say @ gtt_envy

    “Since he felt the need to threaten, I would have made it clear that the next time the turtlehead leaves its shell, he may want to take care in disposing of it properly so everyone can sleep well that night. So gross.”

    Looks like I just missed something with ^. I’m almost afraid to ask lol

  89. DianaSBinOC says:

    @g In fact a tongue is not hard enough feels good she says but not enough pressure…….fingers or vibrators need only apply add penetration and all is well………….she is golden!!

    The problem with Sex in the SB/SD world is the lack of emotion that’s what I think. The exact thing we say we don’t want is the exact thing you need for great sex either that or unabated lust……..which is rare for any SB I would imagine. I know I would have a hard time being super interested in someone 15-20 years my senior!

    While previous SB’s have had hard bodies and I’ve had some great “head” let me reiterate freaking great!! The sex has always been Eh to double Ehhh. Between the one who tried the fake O’ porn sound within 1 minute………..such a turn off. To the dead fish syndrome with another…..both got better, but neither could hold a candle to a off day with my ex. The others were better, but you can always tell the lack of passion that you feel with someone who 100% wants to be nowhere else then with you in that moment.

    Seems my arrangements are getting shorter the last one only lasted a couple a months. Taking a different track this time slightly older 14 years my junior vs the previous 17-18 ish.tt_envy-

    Well said.

    @Aynd – It makes perfect sense.

    lol at fake porn O face. Haaaaaa!

  90. SugarySpicey says:

    TM – Yes and no re: Why I started Sugar. The heartbreak I was referring to when I met my first SD was that and the ending of a very long term relationship – all of which happened in a three month period. He and I had been broken up for a long time, but were still very close, when he passed. Shanghai was my gateway sugar.

  91. SugarySpicey says:

    TM – I replay that conversation/horror story occasionally and there are soooo many things I wish I had said. Gross! Gross! Gross! I just gagged again reading “turtle head” NOT glamorous!

    Rosie – Thanks! The dating infographic is one available online, I just used embed code. The packing list I created by modifying available vector graphics.

  92. Rosie says:

    “…the next time the turtlehead leaves its shell, he may want to take care in disposing of it properly so everyone can sleep well that night. So gross.” -lil_tm

    LMAO! I nearly just fell out of my chair laughing.

  93. lil_tm says:

    I did quickly read over it, but I’m at work and there are some nosy cows grazing to & fro if you catch my drift. 😉 Well written and you have a sense of humor, which is pretty much the number one thing I enjoy in people telling stories.

    If a guy, or anyone for that matter, is going to meet someone of the opposite sex, would it not be the intelligent thing to do to wash your behind?
    Since he felt the need to threaten, I would have made it clear that the next time the turtlehead leaves its shell, he may want to take care in disposing of it properly so everyone can sleep well that night. So gross.

    I do have a question…
    Is the death of your ex the reason why you turned to sugar? I only ask because I’m not sure if your blog is new or if you’ve been doing this a while but just started writing about it and am curious if it plays a part in you doing this.

  94. Rosie says:

    @Spicey

    I’m loving the illustrations on your blog (the packing one and first date tips). Do you create those yourself? Also, I have the Tiffany Manhattan bag too but mine is the espresso in crocodile! So beautiful!! One of my faves.

  95. SugarySpicey says:

    Lil TM, you can click my name, or it’s at sugarmytips.wordpress.com

  96. lil_tm says:

    @Spicey
    Where shall I find this blog? I’ve searched high and low through the thread, and although I have decent vision, I can’t see to locate a link or anything. :(

  97. SugarMeSpicey says:

    Rosie – I still gag when I think about it. I can honestly say, without question that was the grossest moment in my entire life.

  98. SugarMeSpicey says:

    Ladies and Gentlement, Becky’s back … is alls I’m going to say. Becky, that one was for you, because I know it fascinates you.

  99. lil_tm says:

    “In summary, women are almost at their best giving & most generous selves when they are dialed up like this. I learned a long time ago that woman unlike men are dial operated up the seduction ramp, whereas most men are merely switch operated, i.e, on/off.”

    And it takes so little effort to have her wrapped around your finger, but most men will never grasp this and therefore will never accomplish it.

  100. Rosie says:

    Hello beautiful people! I’ve been out of the country on business and just returned home on the red eye. Exhausted and only skimmed the blog quickly (it’s become a bookmark I go to right after I catch up on world news…lol!).

    As usual you’ve all been busy and have had some great convos that I’ve missed out on! I see Pricy-Icy-Spicey has started a sugar blog. I was only able to read one post and OMG, it was the disgusting dingleberry story. It made me dry heave just reading it so I can only imagine what it was like in person. Gag! 😯

    RE: Orgasms
    I started masturbating at a very young age so learned the exact pressures and rhythms I needed in order to orgasm. I always felt guilty like I was doing something sinful, but now I’m thankful for my sins. Didn’t know how much it would help me sexually down the road. True, connection and emotional intimacy plays a big role. Although I can climax pretty easily (esp if there’s intense foreplay involved), I can’t achieve multiple orgasms until I’m very close and comfortable with my partner.

    RE: Length of arrangements
    I think 6 months is very, very short, but probably what is realistic now. My shortest arrangement ever was 6 months. Longest, almost 2 years.

    RE: Papi
    OMG. He’s still around? He was on the site waaaaaaay back in the day when SA was new!!

    RE: Principium mentioned something about “Wosie” not being active on SA
    No. I am not active on SA and haven’t been for a couple of years. I am dating someone IRL now (thankfully, he’s just as generous as my past SDs though – I got lucky!). I am helping a friend out who wanted to try an arrangement so set up a profile for her and then told her to check out the blog, which then brought me back here so now I chime in occasionally if I feel my experience in this obscure world can offer some help to anyone.

  101. Principium says:

    @ Lil: “For me, mental stimulation plays such a huge role in how much a guy can turn me on. Make me laugh, make me feel sexy, have stimulating conversation with me and my juices will flow abundant. Guys only need the physical stimulation. That said, it takes time to get familiar with a persons body and what spots, techniques get them going. Maybe a guy thinks because he is turned on and can pump and dump, he’s had all the fill he needs. Maybe you understand, but most guys do not. I believe, male or female, if you try to delve a little deeper into desires you may not even know you have, you may be surprised just how much sexual gratification you can find beyond your wildest dreams.”

    In summary, women are almost at their best giving & most generous selves when they are dialed up like this. I learned a long time ago that woman unlike men are dial operated up the seduction ramp, whereas most men are merely switch operated, i.e, on/off.

  102. Principium says:

    @ Lil_One: 6 months is not a long time IRL context and I was referring to the people who claim to have had 2 years of SA ongoing arrangements. Also, yes the SBs can (and do) cut it short also. There is a lot of transiency about SA relationships and it has to do with the diametrically opposite objectives and expectations which I keep talking about.

    It is often within our tendencies to over chase (a little bit of chasing is sexy, but not to the point of being over bearing) a potential partner who we deem of as being a point or two in the sexual market value. It is call Hypergamy.

    The ale hypergamy compels him to look for youth and beauty. The female hypergamy compels her to seek factors such as social dominance and power, prestige and wealth. Now add brains and grace to the first set, or looks and charm to the second and you will see how lopsided those hypergamous traits shall become.

  103. Lo says:

    thank you all! Hopefully I can come back trilingual and yes if Madridista ever swings by maybe she can take me under her wing and show me around. Lil TM I’m only here for another four or five months before I leave and I think I’m just a little frustrated right now by how things worked out between me and stalker SD. I saw it playing out a little differently.

  104. Jersey Darling says:

    Lo – congratulations! Perhaps Madridista can give you a tour since she lives there 😉

  105. lil_tm says:

    @Lo
    I would give my left buttcheek to live there. Congrats!!

    Why do you think you can’t find a SD for longer than that?

  106. Lo says:

    I would love to find a SD for just four months…is that so much to ask for? lol. Just found out today that I got placed in Madrid for a teaching position in September and will be there for a few months, so pretty stoked on that.

  107. lil_tm says:

    If an SA arrangement, I’d say very highly unlikely if claimed that was long term, “i.e, for a couple of years or more. From what I gather, 6 month on SA with ongoing allowance is about as long term as long terms can get. 6 x 3-5K + ancillary expenses can run up to a substantial amount. I have heard of guys who have set aside a 50K-100K budget for this purpose, but they also want to play the SB carousel.”

    I don’t think 6 months is a long time. Maybe I’ve just had a different experience but there are men out there whom I believe wouldn’t end it themselves..it is left up to SB.

  108. Lo says:

    that’s what I figured P…

  109. lil_tm says:

    “The problem with Sex in the SB/SD world is the lack of emotion that’s what I think. The exact thing we say we don’t want is the exact thing you need for great sex either that or unabated lust……”

    I agree completely, although I’m not sure it’s the SB/SD dynamic that is the problem. I think you can find it in all types of dating. I disagreed with most of the girls earlier when I said I believe sex can be great on the first try, but I do agree with them that the more a connection is established, the better it gets.

    For me, mental stimulation plays such a huge role in how much a guy can turn me on. Make me laugh, make me feel sexy, have stimulating conversation with me and my juices will flow abundant. Guys only need the physical stimulation. That said, it takes time to get familiar with a persons body and what spots, techniques get them going. Maybe a guy thinks because he is turned on and can pump and dump, he’s had all the fill he needs. Maybe you understand, but most guys do not. I believe, male or female, if you try to delve a little deeper into desires you may not even know you have, you may be surprised just how much sexual gratification you can find beyond your wildest dreams.

  110. flyr says:

    I’ll make a wild guess that the shortening of the SB /SD cycle is at least partially reflective of a different type people who have been attracted to the site over the past two years. It’s hard to put into words but like wine I know it when I taste it.

  111. Principium says:

    @ Lo: Not an SB but I still want to chime in:

    If an SA arrangement, I’d say very highly unlikely if claimed that was long term, i.e, for a couple of years or more. From what I gather, 6 month on SA with ongoing allowance is about as long term as long terms can get. 6 x 3-5K + ancillary expenses can run up to a substantial amount. I have heard of guys who have set aside a 50K-100K budget for this purpose, but they also want to play the SB carousel.

  112. FatBastardSD says:

    @gtt_envy

    Dead on with the lack of emotional connection resulting in lackluster sex. Most SA arrangements are short term (from the statistics/discussions I have heard), and many SB’s have BF’s or other SD’s. Let’s be realistic here, is a SD going to have an emotional bond with a SB who has a BF or multiple SD’s?

    My philosophy is that in these cases use your time with the SB as a sexual fantasy for yourself. Don’t try to create a BF/GF dynamic, or think of your SB as a GF/lover. It is a mutually beneficial relationship, the SB gets the allowance that she is after and the SD gets a sexual experience that he is after.

    Of course the above does not apply when the SB and SD want exclusivity and a long term arrangement. If you want that emotional connection then an exclusive long term arrangement is what it going to take. Even in the case of the married SD, I think an emotional connection will require exclusivity with your SB/mistress.

  113. Lo says:

    for the sbs…when a sd says his last arrangement was really long like two yearsish do you always believe him? Or do you think there’s a possibility he’s choosing to say “long term arrangement” as a way to lure someone in?

  114. Ayr says:

    “why are they getting shorter and shorter? Because of the mediocre sex?”

    Lack of connection.

  115. Lo says:

    gtt great post, why are they getting shorter and shorter? Because of the mediocre sex?

  116. gtt_envy says:

    @Lo, you are not the only alien on planet “I can always get a woman off by penetration alone” my off again on again long term GF needs direct clitoral stimulation. In fact a tongue is not hard enough feels good she says but not enough pressure…….fingers or vibrators need only apply add penetration and all is well………….she is golden!!

    The problem with Sex in the SB/SD world is the lack of emotion that’s what I think. The exact thing we say we don’t want is the exact thing you need for great sex either that or unabated lust……..which is rare for any SB I would imagine. I know I would have a hard time being super interested in someone 15-20 years my senior!

    While previous SB’s have had hard bodies and I’ve had some great “head” let me reiterate freaking great!! The sex has always been Eh to double Ehhh. Between the one who tried the fake O’ porn sound within 1 minute………..such a turn off. To the dead fish syndrome with another…..both got better, but neither could hold a candle to a off day with my ex. The others were better, but you can always tell the lack of passion that you feel with someone who 100% wants to be nowhere else then with you in that moment.

    Seems my arrangements are getting shorter the last one only lasted a couple a months. Taking a different track this time slightly older 14 years my junior vs the previous 17-18 ish.

  117. Lo says:

    another sexy post compliments of flyr!

    spicey not feelin it? :)

  118. SugarySpicey says:

    Lo – that guy definitely wants to turn someone into a skin suit!

  119. flyr says:

    RE First Time

    At the risk of being excommunicated-at this point I’m assuming that both parties are positive about proceeding but the structure of an SA relationship is somewhat an impediment to a naturally occurring evolution from the vertical to the horizontal.

    My personal take is that 30 minutes following the first article of clothing hitting the floor is probably the most critical of what might be a multi year relationship. It’s also supposed to be fun, very fun. Within that, the first 3 minutes sets a tone. It’s a wonderful opportunity.

    My guess is that many of the middle of the road SB’s (neither novice nor industrial debutante) are unsure of what’s going to unfold.

    To use an aviation metaphor, there are some single seat airplanes that you simply have to get in and fly, there’s no instructor or checkpilot sitting beside or behind you. You are on your own. Your stud image at the bar means nothing. Every airplane is different so you need to look carefully (it offers a lot of clues about how it will fly), get mentally prepared , deploy all the sensors and stay engaged.

    I’m also a great fan of taking the time to unwrap the SB as if it were a gift, exploring all the wonderful features. It’s generally a somewhat awkward time for her and a great opportunity for both.

  120. SugarySpicey says:

    Yes please, I’m too curious utahspicey at gmailz.

  121. Lo says:

    spicey he’s not on this site..do you want me to send you a link to his profile through email?

  122. SugarySpicey says:

    Lo – If you don’t want him, send me a key word to search for his profile. I bet he’s fuuuuun. Lol!

  123. Lo says:

    oh and Diana great point about him not having a sex education outside the fourth grade, hilarious but true

  124. Lo says:

    Oh Spicey…how I wish I had your domme skills right about now…

    About Me
    I am looking for a different kind of relationship , one where I spend $ 1,000 to $2000 cash on her EVERY week and I get what I want the most . No romance , No games , just my one fetish catered to. Women with children are ok with me . If your interested in being set for life ( I AM SERIOUS ! ) contact me . Also very important , I work 7 days a week and need a woman who can make time for me . At least an hour a day please .
    I’m looking for…

    I am looking for “TOP” woman who is VERY aggressive and would know how to handle her “man” . Also if there is mutual attraction and my fetishes are catered to . A relationship MAY be possible for an EXCEPTIONLLY loving , caring ,woman who is ok with my fetishes .

  125. SugarySpicey says:

    There’s a movie on female orgasm and the invention of the vibrator, “Hysteria.” I have a JimmyJane handheld from their launch party in Trifecta – unfortunately I burned out the battery, so all I get is sound and fury signifying nothing.

  126. lil_tm says:

    “Ladies, when a guy claims he’s an alpha male, what exactly is to be expected? A boy who throws tantrums?”

    An Alpha male is a dominant male. And a true one wouldn’t announce it to the class. He wouldn’t ever throw a tantrum.

    A Beta male is actually the one that would throw tantrums. Stick a pacifier in his mouth and call it a day.

  127. lil_tm says:

    While I agree that you can’t really be adept at knowing each others body the first time knockin’ boots, I don’t think that means you can’t have great sex.

    There are certain things that pretty much everyone one likes. To me, the biggest problem is finding someone who isn’t a one minute man the first go round.
    What I find interesting is that he thinks she’s bad in bed. A woman would realllly have to leave a bad impression to bad in bed, wouldn’t she??

    Like Hans said, they are both adults. Unless he lied to her and coerced her into have sex, it doesn’t sound like the girl was taken advantage of.
    If she was left feeling cheap afterwards, that is pretty much her problem. Don’t do big girl things if you can’t handle big girl outcomes.

  128. LordByron says:

    The conversation here is hilarious! No not trying to mock anyone, just positively surprised by the volume.

  129. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Principium

    This has nothing to do with what men think but everything to do with biology, evolution & procreation. Let’s not forget that prior to the advent of modern medicine 1 out of 4 women died during child labor & birth! Nature never intended women to have an orgasm in order to bear children, because frankly speaking, impregnating a woman until like 150 years ago could have literally meant a death sentence for that woman!

    Umm this is all well and good but unless someone is dating a man that is 150 years old we should be further along in our knowledge of the female orgasm.

  130. DianaSBinOC says:

    @sweetie

    “Ladies, when a guy claims he’s an alpha male, what exactly is to be expected? A boy who throws tantrums?”

    Betas follow him around like lap dogs and everything he does is for the approval of the group. Oh wait nevermind that’s when he’s in his 20s.

    Generally alphas are the life of the party. When they leave the party is over. They are fun to be around because you’re usually going to have a great time.

    Problem when the party is over you should go home too. There are only so many people that can be ON all the time.

    In most cases if someone actually sits me down and says ” I’m an Alpha” if they aren’t part of the kink community in need of separating themselves from the other subs then I tend to erase “alpha” with “attention seeking douche”.

    My point is the pretenders seem to have a god complex.

    The real ones make a room come alive just stepping into it. You already know the night is going to be memorable. They don’t have to make an announcement because everyone just knows.

    Wow why am I thinking of True Blood now? lol haaa!

  131. Principium says:

    @ Sweetie: “Ladies, when a guy claims he’s an alpha male, what exactly is to be expected? A boy who throws tantrums?”

    That he was a subordinate supplicating Beta who unwittingly turned into an angry Omega, all the while thinking that he’s now an Alpha! So, ask him if he’s a Hyena?

    I hope that this clears the issue up for you 😀

  132. sweetie says:

    Hehehe “it means he sees himself as the biggest swinging dick in the room”
    Now, if he could swing that dick properly…

  133. Principium says:

    @ Diana: “I mean if most women required a vaginal intercourse for an orgasm don’t men think that sex would be more so readily available to them?”

    This has nothing to do with what men think but everything to do with biology, evolution & procreation. Let’s not forget that prior to the advent of modern medicine 1 out of 4 women died during child labor & birth! Nature never intended women to have an orgasm in order to bear children, because frankly speaking, impregnating a woman until like 150 years ago could have literally meant a death sentence for that woman!

    As a matter of fact, up until about a 100 years ago the subject of female orgasm was considered a myth by most doctors and some women who had complained about never reaching orgasms were in fact committed to mental institutions! As an informational tidbit, did you know that the modern day vibrators were stemmed from medical apparatus which were designed by OBGYNs in the early 1910s & 1920s to explore female orgasms? Factoids which you will verify by visiting the Museum of Sex in NY 😉

    Recent scientific studies have shown that while female orgasm is not necessary for procreation, during an orgasm the male sperm journey tends to be expedited and accelerated via either Fallopian tube to connect with the most suitable and fertile egg. Science has yet to discover as to how the sperms journey is selected within the female body as to whether to go to the left or to go right!

  134. SugarySpicey says:

    Sweetie: it means he sees himself as the biggest swinging dick in the room, a guy other men look up to. He’s probably not going to be very romantic (or especially great in bed) because he’s accustomed to deference and respect from those around him.) Unfortunately, sometimes men say they’re alphas when really they’re just machismo jerks.

  135. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Hans Solo

    “It’s sort of like interviewing new hire candidates, I realize. If you simply have one to interview, and they fit the description and you feel OK about them, you might be inclined to hire that first candidate. But if you have a few with which to compare and contrast, then the deficiencies are quite obvious.”

    Great until someone better comes along. I understand:)

  136. sweetie says:

    Ladies, when a guy claims he’s an alpha male, what exactly is to be expected? A boy who throws tantrums?

  137. SugarySpicey says:

    I’m really, really trying to be SugarySpicey Sweetie something about blogging my past sexcapades is putting me in a good mood. Though in editing down tomorrow’s post, I may have gone too far. 😉

  138. SugarySpicey says:

    All this sex chat has been perfect inspiration for what might be my favorite sex scene I’ve ever written. Ah, the delightful puzzle of the female orgasm, and a glass of wine to the man who’s solved them all.

  139. sweetie says:

    Spicey “I also hiss and scratch (in case you haven’t noticed)”
    I haven’t noticed it lately.

  140. SugarySpicey says:

    I only purr when I’m content and playing. I also hiss and scratch (in case you haven’t noticed). 😉

  141. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Lo

    “my stalker SD or ex SD?? kept wanting reassurance about his performance and if I liked him because I wasn’t “orgasming”. I can’t orgasm only through penetration and he couldn’t understand that. He kept saying how I was one of the few girls in his life who couldn’t finish. I’m guessing his past lovers were faking because I can’t be the only weird alien creature who can’t get off only through penetration. Honestly I don’t think I made him feel man enough which is what he wanted.”

    Lol this guy is nuts haha maybe poor choice of wording. First when do you compare a woman to any other in the bedroom? Seriously FAIL!. Next everyone that has taken any type of sex education outside of 4th grade is well aware that most women (70%) get off to clitorial stimulation only. In line below that is required clitoral stimulation with intercourse , further down is intercourse only, then anal and there are those special women that can orgasm by breast stimulation.There are other variations of course and other areas that get women screaming but those are the general locations. Seriously? How are these older men having so much sex yet don’t even know the basics?

    I mean if most women required a vaginal intercourse for an orgasm don’t men think that sex would be more so readily available to them?

  142. sweetie says:

    Spicey, you’re always purrrrring! How do you manage that? Here I am in all my sweetness and just can’t sweeten up at all. Boo!

  143. sweetie says:

    P, I’m jaded too. Who else is jaded? Join the club. Can we bitch and moan?

  144. SugarySpicey says:

    Capitol B – well that would be my brand of sweetness then, wouldn’t it? Prrrrrrdddddd

  145. Principium says:

    @ Sweetie: I’m just jaded 😉

    @ Nicey: we’ll just savor your brand of spices for after the desert…

  146. SugarySpicey says:

    Capitol P – Don’t you think I bring enough flavor? Pretty pout. :(

  147. SugarySpicey says:

    I guess Sweetie outlined the lesson well, Hans: “Don’t be so quick to get her in bed, either!!!” It’s just too risky in your situation. And this is coming from a girl who is rather eager to jump in the sack. You lucked out that SB #1 didn’t give drama, but a one date “do it and dump it” can turn girls a little nutty, and nobody wants that.

    P.S. – welcome to the sugar bowl, speculation is our specialty.

  148. sweetie says:

    P, nobody wanted to bring the skeleton out!!!!

  149. Principium says:

    @ Spicey: a surprise spicy dish 😉

    @ Hans Solo: what do these letters mean to you: B +E + C & K?

  150. sweetie says:

    The girls are saying don’t be so quick to judge after 1 round of sex, and don’t be so quick to get her in bed, either!!!! Also, if it wasn’t promising for you it surely wasn’t promising for her. Let’s be fair and tame our expectations. However, knowing that sex is expected, I can’t seem to get over the fact that that’s the only thing some SDs are after; it’s more like when do I get mine, I’m paying for it attitude!? Such a turn off :(

  151. Han Solo says:

    OK, I’m back! Lots of speculating while I was away.

    Yes, SB #1 got a full date (activity + dinner) and some allowance out of it. I wasn’t taking advantage of her. And yes we had sex anyway because we were both adults and wanted to. At the time the date was fine. If I had to score it that night it would have been a B+/A-. But in hindsight, and after having a meet-and-greet with someone else, I realized that I was missing a deep connection with SB #1. Everything we talked about was quite shallow and a bit strained. Whereas with POT SB #2, we talked effortlessly for hours over a glass of wine. I didn’t want it to end.

    It’s sort of like interviewing new hire candidates, I realize. If you simply have one to interview, and they fit the description and you feel OK about them, you might be inclined to hire that first candidate. But if you have a few with which to compare and contrast, then the deficiencies are quite obvious.

    Regarding pros, yes I’ve been with many and I’m tired of that (mostly). I’m looking for more than just sex for a couple of hours. I’m looking for a connection.

  152. SugarySpicey says:

    Well Lo – get in there and help a brother out! They like the show.

    Capitol P – so what are you cooking me?

  153. Principium says:

    I agree with the no sampling suggestion and I have never been a fan of a “test drive” liaison at a local hotel. I understand that my situation as an unattached cad may be quite different to a lot of married SA Dads, but FWIW, my best first experiences were either with someone whom I had known for more than a couple of weeks who came to my House for some apéritif, supper & wine (either I cooked in her presence or had delivered from a high end caterer) or we went away for a day or two to some neutral getaway place (both scenarios can become very awkward if no time spent together to form a connection without the right amount of chemistry & sexual tension)

    OK, where am I going with this?! Oh fcuk it, you are all big girls! You know where I’m going!

  154. Lo says:

    lol yeah spicey i can do it if i give myself a hand hahahah

  155. SugarySpicey says:

    That sucks Lo – never from penetration? Even if you give yourself a hand? I know it’s a common thing, but that’s sure not fun that he wouldn’t switch up his approach to try something that you know works for your body.

  156. SugarySpicey says:

    Capitol P – I read his blog, remember? Which I won’t out here as that wouldn’t be fair. I actually liked his opinions on sexuality expressed there, but the experience one gets from a Pro is going to be different from a hypothetical very young (or inexperienced) SB, so I used the age 22 as a point of reference to mean less sexually self-aware.

  157. Lo says:

    was the connection really that bad though if they ended up having sex anyway?

  158. Lo says:

    my stalker SD or ex SD?? kept wanting reassurance about his performance and if I liked him because I wasn’t “orgasming”. I can’t orgasm only through penetration and he couldn’t understand that. He kept saying how I was one of the few girls in his life who couldn’t finish. I’m guessing his past lovers were faking because I can’t be the only weird alien creature who can’t get off only through penetration. Honestly I don’t think I made him feel man enough which is what he wanted.

  159. Principium says:

    Here is his last post:

    “@sweetie
    We had a really good first meeting. The second time we met, the real date, was just OK. No real connection. Or the connection was a little forced on both ends. Ultimately I don’t want to be another john, or do a P4P arrangement. I’m looking for a connection.

    @DianaSBinOC
    Meaning the sex didn’t really live up to expectations. Turns out that was just another dagger in the potential relationship.

    Thanks again to you all for the advice. Like I said, I’m learning and trying to do the right thing. Now is the time to shape me!”

    What’s next?! The earth is flat?

  160. Principium says:

    Hey, hey, hey… Stop all this conjecture gurls! When did he say that she was 22 YO and that he paid $200? Seriously, don’t have this shoot first attitude. All I know that he said he was pushing 40 and that they had sex which did not seem good. Some of you are very subjective and acting like a lynch mob.

  161. Principium says:

    Perhaps an acclimation phase is a a better substitute for “trial period”? Common some of you smart wordsy wordsmiths! Package and market my words for me 😉

    Spicey, where did H.S say that he was into Pros?! But yes, real pros are very adept actresses and when they “orgasm” 5 times in 1/2 hour with tremors stronger than the 1989 SF earthquake, it is hard to register a 0.5 Richter wobble by an already apprehensive SB.

  162. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Spicey
    Although, for a man it takes a lot less to blow someone’s mind. I wonder if this may be that Hans is more accustomed to Pros, so maybe he didn’t realize how great the divide is between a 22 year old SB and a 30 year old professional escort.

    That was going to be my next line of questioning. What exactly is required of a first time experience with a 22 year old ?

    He’s almost 40 and married and she’s 22 getting dropped for not providing enough fireworks? Wow tough crowd.

    I’m also guessing this trial set him back about $200 and dinner maybe? Hmm.

  163. SugarySpicey says:

    Although, for a man it takes a lot less to blow someone’s mind. I wonder if this may be that Hans is more accustomed to Pros, so maybe he didn’t realize how great the divide is between a 22 year old SB and a 30 year old professional escort.

  164. DianaSBinOC says:

    “I read Han’s post and I’m also a little confused by the fact he cut the sb after giving her one whirl in the sack. Are people expecting fireworks their first time going at it? The only time that has ever happened to me was when I was super infatuated with someone.”

    First time sex usually blows. I have never had a “wow he blew my mind on the first try”. It’s awkward and you’re just trying to feel the person out. If the man in question is barely attractive it’s going to be much harder unless he’s already shown her the award winning personality reserved for angels and of course $$$. Remember if she’s not a pro she will not be able to necessarily fake it to make it. It takes time to build up that chemistry where you hit all the right spots.

    Let’s not only forget the younger a SB is the less partners she may have. Sure statistically speaking she may have more partners based on the curiosity of finding one that can provide her with the big O. Still more partners doesn’t always mean she’s having great sex.

  165. Lo says:

    Interesting stuff indeed…
    and perhaps I should also be more open minded to SDs outside of Cali…

  166. DianaSBinOC says:

    “Diana how has your experience been so far with the oc sds?”

    The wealth is here the generosity not so much. I get more offers to go to Dubai when I bump into those wealthy types at clubs. Actually for Halloween I went to a club and had this guy insist on buying me a drink all night. After I refused for the eight time he told me I should come with him to his homeland of Dubai. When I told him I wouldn’t set foot in that country as a woman he said ” you’re too smart”.

    I just sauntered over to another side of the club. Eeks.

    OC is old money LA is new money. You’ll meet more trust fund babies here since their parents are quite well off financially.

    The men that have contacted me, although financially capable of providing a decent allowance tend to be in the 50-70 age group and think $200 offers are amazing. The problem is that because they are wealthy they do quite a bit of haggling in life anyways. In these cases they want to feel like they’ve struck another deal.

    Not all are this way but the ones that have contacted me tend to try and do the “let’s make a deal” or it’s the wonderful “test drive”pitch. I almost wonder if exiting the shower should include use of body lotion or perhaps a nice spritz of Armorall Triple Action Protectant. Vroom Vroom lol

    My best arrangement have been with men outside of the country or anywhere but CA surprisingly. My UK sugar sub was the best. That’s actually the reason why I signed up to these sites in the first place. I thought if I could receive such benefits online sans sex, why not enjoy the full benefits of a mutually beneficial relationship in person avec steamy sex.

    The other sugar I met on a regular dating site and the last I chatted on another site. The common denominator was that they were all under 40 and so easy to get along with. It wasn’t forced and I didn’t have to ask them for an allowance. They just were like here you go $$$$.

    Ohh and the sugar sub I chatted with last week has already contributed (online only). He’s already hit the passive aggressive route so I told him to take a long walk off a short cliff.

  167. Jersey Darling says:

    @Lo – I do think some men (not sure if this is the case with Han or if the performance was so atrocious he knew there wasn’t a chance of anything evolving) expect fireworks right away.

    I can’t speak for most ladies, but while I do have a few tricks up my sleeve, the key to me blowing someone away in the bedroom is getting to know them. I intuitively read their reactions pretty well, but it only gets better in time. And the first time – yes, I am nervous!

    Also, to my post above – I rarely would even phrase it as a trial period. I’m subtle and mention it casually, along the lines of “Hey, I’m super excited about us and can’t wait to take things a step further. Why don’t we try things out? I’d love to spend a month with you, really getting to explore each other, and see how things go from there.”

  168. Lo says:

    I read Han’s post and I’m also a little confused by the fact he cut the sb after giving her one whirl in the sack. Are people expecting fireworks their first time going at it? The only time that has ever happened to me was when I was super infatuated with someone.

  169. SugarySpicey says:

    Hans – one question came to mind as I read Jersey’s post. Had the SB gotten anything out of the trial? If she was giving a “sample” maybe she was a little hurt/bothered/uncomfortable with that idea and feeling a little taken advantage of? I may be misreading the word “trial” because you sound nice and I don’t think “sampling” is nice. But, an SD definitely wouldn’t get my best performance if he asked for a sample (and I was somehow foolish enough to give it to him). I’d probably go home feeling like trash. Word to the wise if you want discretion and no drama, don’t sample!

  170. Jersey Darling says:

    @Han Solo

    Coming from an old fashioned girl with an open mind, here is what I like to do if the discussion turns to “trial periods”:

    I suggest a month long trial because having sex one time is hardly enough to gauge what chemistry can develop – no one learns to read their partner’s body language after one attempt! So if the SD is amenable to it and we’re not sure about a full arrangement, I prefer allowance monthly as well, so I suggest we try things out for a month. He gives the month’s allowance, we explore our chemistry and are free to see each other as often as we want (though generally we have an idea of how often we’ll be meeting), and we go from there. There’s no performance pressure because we know we have a month to get to know each other, and at the end of that month after we’ve learned to read each other better, if we’re not satisfied we both part ways. If we are, the arrangement simply continues.

    This works well for me also because I’ve had relatively few sexual partners and I don’t like adding another to the list unless I get my mileage out of it 😉

  171. SugarySpicey says:

    Diana – be sure to have six cups of coffee before so that you can have the meth-head shakes.

  172. DianaSBinOC says:

    I decided to give wyp another try but this time any low offers will get accepted. I’ll just show up looking like hell warmed over complete with a few broken nails, laundry day pants, running mascara etc. You’re typical wanted in three states plus addiction look. I’ll keep using the term “baby” every few minutes like a broken record. I mine as well have some fun with this:) lol

  173. Lo says:

    Diana how has your experience been so far with the oc sds?

  174. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Hans Solo

    “Hah! Maybe slightly younger than average. Pushing 40. Can’t speak objectively about my looks, but I think I look fine. Being married has me nicely whipped…er, I mean I know how to treat a lady.”

    Wow I think you’re the first married man that has posted here that actually sounds super sweet:)

  175. lil_tm says:

    “I had someone say, “I’m really excited to move things to the next level, what would that take.” I thought it was so hot!”

    A man taking initiative and actually grabbing the bull by the horns IS hot. :)

  176. SugarySpicey says:

    I had someone say, “I’m really excited to move things to the next level, what would that take.” I thought it was so hot!

  177. Principium says:

    @ HS: by pushing 40, I gather that you are not exactly 40. Therefore you are on the younger side of the SA SD demographics, specially since a lot of SDs lie about their age.

    IMO, if you change Lil_Tm’s suggested phrase from “the discussion which neither one of us wants to have” to “the discussion which we ought to have” , it sounds better.

  178. Han Solo says:

    @Principium
    Hah! Maybe slightly younger than average. Pushing 40. Can’t speak objectively about my looks, but I think I look fine. :) Being married has me nicely whipped…er, I mean I know how to treat a lady.

    @SugarySpicey
    Thanks for reading. Yes, I’ve been very direct in my communications about who I am and what I’m looking for.

    @lil_tm
    I might actually try that angle. I’m not one to shy away from being direct because I do believe in strong communication. (The irony with my wife is not list on me.) For this next POT, she and I really clicked on our introductory meeting. Hoping that our date this week works out well.

    Thanks again everyone!

  179. lil_tm says:

    “so pusses-officer be my new phrase.”

    Lolz..sounds like ebonics..

  180. SugarySpicey says:

    OMG – I’m clearly only marginally literate today. Distracted by this bizarre influx of hotties with naughty bodies that popped into my SA inbox, and Capitol P’s chest.

    Too bad all the SA boys are looking for luuuurv. Ladies, search Cleveland. You’re welcome.

  181. SugarySpicey says:

    Lol, I meant to say pisses, but my vagina would be rather angry too, so pusses-officer be my new phrase.

  182. lil_tm says:

    @Hans

    I agree that due to the nature of the site, a discussion about an arrangement is absolutely expected. And since I believe men should always take the lead, I expect them to broach the subject.
    It’s never a comfortable discussion, but I think it should happen on the 2nd meeting at the very latest. The longer it goes without being discussed, the more awkward it becomes…..and…well, the more awkward it becomes. Get it out of the way so you never have to worry about it again.

    Sometimes I wish you could just say, “Hey! You know that discussion neither of us wants to have? Let’s get it out of the way!” Maybe that’s an angle to try?

  183. sweetie says:

    Spicey “Don’t risk drama through ambiguity. Nothing pusses a lady off like a man who sleeps with her and then changes his mind.”

    Totally agree!!!!

  184. lil_tm says:

    “^ ^ ^ THANK YOU CAPTAIN OBVIOUS ^ ^ ^”

    *angrily storms off*

    (just kidding)

  185. Principium says:

    Yup, my method is for an unattached SD. I must have missed that part, unless you picked up on it from your Sugar Blog. I do’t normally sleep with a woman till we have known each other for a couple of weeks and have met up a few times. I have learned that the “little gift” without any expectation whatsoever, goes a long way to establish trust. If she bails on me with say a 1K “investment” for a couple of weeks without intimacy, that is actually the best long term gamble which I would always take!

    In case of married, Sugary Nicey Splicy Dicey knows her shiite 😉

  186. SugarySpicey says:

    Hey Han- I’ve read your blog (thanks for following BTW) in your case where discretion is important, I’d make a specific offer. Capitol P’s “develop chemistry and gift a little along the way” is a risky game for a married man who needs discretion. I’d do a few intro communications and then lay it out: I’m married, I’m looking for a playmate to meet up with x number of times, I offer y. Let’s meet and see if there’s chemistry and we want to go further, than only have sex if you want a 2-6 month commitment with that girl.

    Don’t risk drama through ambiguity. Nothing pusses a lady off like a man who sleeps with her and then changes his mind.

  187. Han Solo says:

    @sweetie
    We had a really good first meeting. The second time we met, the real date, was just OK. No real connection. Or the connection was a little forced on both ends. Ultimately I don’t want to be another john, or do a P4P arrangement. I’m looking for a connection.

    @DianaSBinOC
    Meaning the sex didn’t really live up to expectations. Turns out that was just another dagger in the potential relationship.

    Thanks again to you all for the advice. Like I said, I’m learning and trying to do the right thing. Now is the time to shape me! :)

  188. Principium says:

    @ HS: it ought not be awkward discussing arrangements, as it is the very nature of this site vs traditional dating sites. You may find it awkward discussing an “allowance” which very well could be the trickiest component of an arrangement relationship for a novice to handle. A good place to start with would be if you were both on the same page in terms of your stated range. If both of you are open about the allowance range, then make your proposal based on what you can budget and allow for but do not bargain or try to convince her otherwise if you are not initially in the ballpark.

    There is nothing wrong with making a reasonable and respectable proposal encompassing the tricky issue of allowance and your own expectations. After all, you are both adults and you are in this to cut through the chase. As stated in one of my posts from yesterday, if your demands & expectations are not diametrically opposite, make your offer and give her a bit of time to consider it. If you are genuine in your intentions, she may seriously consider it after her inbox gets inundated by the creeps and the sex pests.

    The fact that you have already been able to set some dates up and have gotten intimacy already out of one potential SB, leads me to believe that you are perhaps younger that average SDs on here with better than average looks, manners and social skills set.

  189. sweetie says:

    Hans “I’ve already gone on one trial date with one of them. Intimacy was just OK and so I’m moving on.”

    One trial with getting in the sack? Is that really a trial or sampling without buying? How much time did you actually invest in this before the trial? How many dates before, how attracted were you to each other (both intellectually and physically), how was the connection? Please don’t get offended, just sounds like you’re another John, and that’s certainly not something we encourage.
    This is what I got from reading you post, Solo. Honestly, no attack intended.

  190. DianaSBinOC says:

    @ Hans Solo

    What exactly do you mean by trial date and the intimacy being “OK”?

  191. Han Solo says:

    @Principium
    Thanks for the advice. Trial period definitely sounds classier. I’ve been meeting with a few different POT sugar babies now. I feel like I would like to go on trial dates with the POT list and see which one I connect with best.

    I’ve already gone on one trial date with one of them. Intimacy was just OK and so I’m moving on. I have another date set up this week and am just wondering how to approach the subject of the arrangement. Being very new to this, just speaking about money and what’s involved is very foreign to me. Is there any way to bring it up during the date that doesn’t sound as crass as I think it might?

    @lil_tm
    Yes, I was being moderated. Understandable for a first-time poster like me. Thank you both for finding my comment!

  192. Principium says:

    ^ ^ ^ THANK YOU CAPTAIN OBVIOUS ^ ^ ^ 😛

  193. lil_tm says:

    @ Hans

    I believe sometimes when new members make a post, it has to be approved by a moderator before it shows up.

    I noticed some posts way after the blog had continued that I didn’t notice and I think that’s the only explanation.

  194. lil_tm says:

    What’s also strange is that they call women ugly that are actually quite stunning in looks.”

    Just proves what miserable people they are.

  195. Principium says:

    @ Hans Solo: it looks like your posts are getting moderated, so this got buried behind the clucking and brooding of our blog flock of hens:

    “Hello!

    I’m new to SA and the Sugar Bowl. I’ve read a lot of the blog posts on this blog–which is immensely helpful–but still have a question about arranging a trial date (after the initial casual meeting).

    What’s the best way to figure out terms of the date with a sugar baby? Do I just come right out and say “For this trial date I will give you an allowance of $$$.”?

    Thanks for the advice!

    -HS”

    Fist of all, I would frame it quite differently than “a trial date” if your intention is not P4P. A trial period sounds a lot more evolved and classier than a date, as I have come to find out that a “date” in this realm can have somewhat of a negative connotation. Get to know her a bit better first, without communicating excessively and then offer your proposal during the second meeting (my preference). If there’s good chemistry, energy and you are prepared to partially meet her financial expectations during that courtship period, I believe that sexual liaison will follow more naturally without anyone having to act out. If intimacy happens to be disappointing, then you both can hopefully move on like two adults without resorting to bitterness and resentment.

    If you are limited in terms of time and the effort which you would want to put into this method, then it is OK to express out your desire and proposal all upfront. At least you are being honest with your intentions and she can either accept it or walk away. This latter method has not been that sexy for my own tastes.

    Good luck.

  196. SugarySpicey says:

    Diana, I can hear the soundtrack now:

    “Nom, nom, nom, mmmm.” *Think Cookie Monster with a bag of Chips Ahoy

    “Oh, Oh, Ow, Ow! Ow!!!”

    “Mmm, mmmaaww, nom, nom”

    “Stop” splash, fizz, hisssss

  197. SugarySpicey says:

    Just got a message from a guy I’d totally hump IRL!!!!

  198. DianaSBinOC says:

    “OMG – I hate the guys who say “orally gifted” that always means sloppy and too rough!”

    Eww I can now just imagine him gumming away at a woman’s clitoris trying to bite it off. I always viewed “orally gifted” as code for droopy cock syndrome complete with open mouth attack kissing where a splash of peroxide over the face ends in fizzing and bubbling.

  199. DianaSBinOC says:

    meangirls.com

    I did watch a watch a show where he incorrectly labelled a woman a whore and it caused all kinds of issues in her life.

    What’s also strange is that they call women ugly that are actually quite stunning in looks.

  200. lil_tm says:

    And I thought the Leather Oaks guy was weird…

  201. SugarySpicey says:

    TM – they’re rather funny looking, especially when the guy’s been wearing it for a few days with no relief! Hahaha!!

  202. lil_tm says:

    “TM – Cage cuckies usually come across really demanding, and often times think they are sexually dominant (until they realize how comforting they find it to go back to Junior High when they walked around with a semi all the time and girls ignored them. Back when they didn’t have to stress about premature ejaculation or going soft). Cuckies are usually really sweet and attentive, so long as they’re teased and denied. They make excellent SDs, if you can keep them from getting too attached (as was the problem with my last SD).”

    Ahhh..Ok..the man piece is caged. I see. I just did a GIS. That kind of grossed me out.

  203. SugarySpicey says:

    OMG – I hate the guys who say “orally gifted” that always means sloppy and too rough!

  204. SugarySpicey says:

    TM – Cage cuckies usually come across really demanding, and often times think they are sexually dominant (until they realize how comforting they find it to go back to Junior High when they walked around with a semi all the time and girls ignored them. Back when they didn’t have to stress about premature ejaculation or going soft). Cuckies are usually really sweet and attentive, so long as they’re teased and denied. They make excellent SDs, if you can keep them from getting too attached (as was the problem with my last SD).

  205. DianaSBinOC says:

    @lo
    “I think I’m going to experiment and put up a picture of my 12 year old self and see if I get an increase in responses…brb…”

    HAAA! Sadly if you did post a picture of a 12 year old your inbox would probably be overflowing with offers.

    “P.S. – this man is late 70′s and says Viagara doesn’t work for him, only young girls do. Barf!”

    “That was awfully nice of him to drop that hint that he isn’t impotent. ”

    Well at least he didn’t say “orally gifted”. lol

  206. lil_tm says:

    I enjoy these little experiments.

    I admit, I once created a dummy profile while my original was up just to see what would happen..Same guys, same messages, etc.
    And it just so happens two pot SD’s I had been on a couple lunch dates with both messaged me.
    One of them has a kind of silly sense of humor like I do, so I replied with a really erratic message with an abundance of exclamation points and lots of overly excited nonsensical B.S.
    His response was, “OOOOOOOOOKKKKKKKKKKK”

    haha..the things I’ll do to kill my boredom at work are pretty retarded. We’re still friends, though. He’s a cool guy. Just needs to wax his hairy chest.

    The guy in the cage–I would have to play that out for a bit just out of sheer curiosity. It would be funny if these types IRL are actually curt, mean, and demanding.

  207. Lo says:

    not too shab for a days work!

  208. SugarySpicey says:

    I’ve replied to:

    1 guy who really liked my shoe, turned out to be an old college professor
    1 guy with a pic of him with his “private plane,” a couple messages, then poof
    1 guy that I’m meeting for drinks on Friday
    1 guy who wants me to lock his junk in a cage and make him give me gifts in order to get released, a couple messages with him (I can’t resist a good chastity cucky)
    1 guy who is a financial slave type – I told him to f*ck off until he sent me something from my wish list

  209. Lo says:

    I think I’m going to experiment and put up a picture of my 12 year old self and see if I get an increase in responses…brb…

    jkjk

  210. lil_tm says:

    All these hormones! No wonder love turns us into a blubbering fool.

    @Spicey-How many of those message have you responded to?

    I agree with flyr..I would just save the info in a word doc and call it a day. Although I am curious why you hid your profile and are still getting messages. Maybe contact the website and ask?

  211. flyr says:

    @Treasured “I do not want my profile to show up on SA, but I don’t want to delete it too yet (took a lot of time to write it up and don’t want to do it again).”

    Easy answer is to copy the text to word (actually it is far easier to write profiles in word or if you are a traditionalist WP) and save it . It’s always there for your editing or later use.

    You might need to get into the profile edit mode to be able to block copy

  212. SugarySpicey says:

    Correction: the foot got 13 and the legs got 13 – which to me says that for some photos it’s just about something eye catching, not necessarily sexy or pretty. Tomorrow I’ll test a photo of my Beagle and we’ll see what happens.

  213. SugarySpicey says:

    Wow! The red bikini photo is a definite winner. 98 messages in all. 9 from the foot photo (mostly perves), 17 from the legs photo (mostly perves), and all the rest from the bikini photo (without an increase in the perves or P4P types). So, for me, if I just want to be able to pick from the largest pool of POT’s the bikini photo wins, hands down.

  214. Principium says:

    I’m not much of a thinker as I’m a doer. The dreamer dreams, whilst the doer, well, does 😉

  215. Principium says:

    For those interested in tricks which one’s brain plays in intense case of what we call “LUVVVVVRRRR” (long copy & paste job, but worth reading)

    There are generally three stages involved leading to “love”:

    1- Lust: driven by sex hormones both in men and women, i.e, testosterone and oestrogen.

    2- Falling in love (intense attraction and when one’s guards are at their lowest ): the amazing time when you are truly love-struck and can think of little else. The three main neurotransmitters are involved in this stage are adrenaline, dopamine and serotonin.

    A- Adrenaline: the initial stages of falling for someone activates the stress response, increasing blood levels of adrenalin and cortisol. This has the charming effect that when you unexpectedly bump into your new love, you start to sweat, your heart races and your mouth goes dry.

    B- Dopamine: this chemical stimulates ‘desire and reward’ by triggering an intense rush of pleasure. It has the same effect on the brain as taking cocaine! Signs of surging dopamine are increased energy, less need for sleep or food, focused attention and exquisite delight in smallest details of this novel relationship

    C- Serotonin: one of love’s most important chemicals that may explain why when you’re falling in love, your new lover constantly keeps popping into your thoughts.

    3- Being in love (attachment):

    A- Oxytocin – The cuddle hormone is a powerful hormone released by men and women during orgasm. It probably deepens the feelings of attachment and makes couples feel much closer to one another after they have had sex. The theory goes that the more sex a couple has, the deeper their bond becomes. Oxytocin also seems to help cement the strong bond between mother and baby and is released during childbirth. It is also responsible for a mother’s breast automatically releasing milk at the mere sight or sound of her young baby.

    B- Vasopressin: is another important hormone in the long-term commitment stage and is released after sex.Studies have shown that when Vasopressin (also called anti-diuretic hormone) levels are suppressed, the bond within partners deteriorates immediately as their devotion is lost and they fail to protect their partner from new suitors.

    This site seems to be a very promising conduit to all those delicious biochemical cocktails, and BTW, I still have some of those prime beach front properties on the Moon. But hurry up, ’cause they are selling real fast!

  216. SugarySpicey says:

    Do you think there’s a chance in hell my Cathedral is anything but cozy? I’m a tiny woman, who does a lot of yoga.

  217. Han Solo says:

    Hello!

    I’m new to SA and the Sugar Bowl. I’ve read a lot of the blog posts on this blog–which is immensely helpful–but still have a question about arranging a trial date (after the initial casual meeting).

    What’s the best way to figure out terms of the date with a sugar baby? Do I just come right out and say “For this trial date I will give you an allowance of $$$.”?

    Thanks for the advice!

    -HS

  218. Principium says:

    It depends on the size of the trap. My fave goes goes like this:
    Although my organ plays very well, it is not suited to very large cathedrals 😉

  219. SugarySpicey says:

    Well, P – you know the best way to shut a woman up if she yammers too much? 😉

  220. Principium says:

    ^ You natter and yammer too much and your punishment shall become locked in another man’s tower for much longer than originally planned ^

  221. SugarySpicey says:

    Search: Big Sexy from Michigan. I might be willing to wash my clothes on that (since Capitol P just wants to lock me in another man’s tower).

  222. lil_tm says:

    Sure you don’t wanna indulge in some old geezer lovin’?
    That was awfully nice of him to drop that hint that he isn’t impotent. 😉

  223. SugarySpicey says:

    TM – yep, Mexico.

  224. lil_tm says:

    I have received an e-mail from Papi. Older man with white hair from either Florida or Cuba IIRC?

  225. SugarySpicey says:

    I know, LO, you’re trying to drop a couple elbees just like me so that he’ll want you. So hot!!

  226. Lo says:

    P.S. – this man is late 70′s and says Viagara doesn’t work for him, only young girls do. Barf!

    ::runs to bathroom, proceeds to vomit uncontrollably::

  227. SugarySpicey says:

    Ladies! I’ve just found him! Don’t be jelly.

    If you are open minded, submissive, and loaded with fantasies come play with me in my tropical paradise!!! xoxoxoPapi

    SUMMER INTERNSHIP AVAILABLE

    I have with me now a former Miss Korea now is a fitness and bikini model who needs a playmate. if this sounds like fun, please send some full length pics and your phone number and will return of some of her

    P.S. – this man is late 70’s and says Viagara doesn’t work for him, only young girls do. Barf!

  228. lil_tm says:

    Well, besides a broken heart, I suppose the worst thing it ever caused me was a high car insurance bill. I was so excited to hear from him, that I couldn’t wait to respond (while driving) and hit the back of a someones vehicle.

    Chemistry is a really odd thing, indeed. I’m still not sure if it was lust or love. Or both. Who knows?

  229. lil_tm says:

    But Oh-So-Delicious. MMMMM Yummy! 😉

  230. Lo says:

    and great sex with someone you’re super attracted to on more than one level—-DANGER ZONE

  231. SugarySpicey says:

    If you give a woman great sex, she will do anything for you.

    Sad, but true. Oxytocin is one heavy drug!

  232. Lo says:

    Sugar I can’t be mad at that, I have bought a flight ticket to croatia before because of this chemistry AKA crack which ended in disaster by the way. See the hold that it has on us where we will actually fly out of the country for it?? LoL

  233. SugarySpicey says:

    My married SD that I met in Shanghai was like crack. I didn’t have guilt about his marriage though because that was on him; I didn’t pursue him, he pursued me. But, we also never talked about, or mentioned the wife’s existence. I was hooked on him, but having him live in a different part of the world helped. But, I’d probably drop everything and fly to meet him in some exotic location at a moment’s notice if he called, so not completely over yet either.

  234. lil_tm says:

    “Nik Ritchie is a disgusting individual I’m waiting for the day that he’s served his karma on a plate. His marriage is failing so I think it’s about to happen anyway. A lot of the rumors on his website aren’t even verified..so you could be living a wholesome life as a teacher or what not, and some jealous hater can post a lie about how you’re sleeping with people’s husbands and tarnish your reputation, Nik will post it not caring if it’s true or not.”

    I have always found these people to be miserable and insecure. And in doing what they do, they are projecting their self hatred onto others. Truly sad.

  235. Lo says:

    lil tm i get it…great sexual chemistry is for lack of a better word…like crack. And many jedi mind tricks are needed in order to get over it….

  236. lil_tm says:

    “I should correct my statement to: “I like married men who want to stay married.” And, in my circumstances I certainly won’t be falling in love and going all crazy (or making up lies about being in the hospital). So in the situations I select married men = less likelihood of drama. Your results may vary.”

    Granted, married men on a site like this is a little different than the guy who approached me on a regular dating site. I just know my conscious would get the better of me.
    The possibility of falling for someone is always there. It comes with physical/emotional/mental attraction. Eventually, people grow on you and you care deeply for them. Even for someone like me who greatly values my independence and time alone. I know there are men out there who would make me rethink my love of alone time.
    If I were to test the waters with a married man, chances are the drama would come at some point. Either I would feel unfulfilled at being a concubine or he would be unhappy that I wouldn’t give more.

  237. Lo says:

    Just based on how he spoke to me I already knew his allowance offer was probably in the $400 a month range.

    Diana..LOL

  238. Lo says:

    Nik Ritchie is a disgusting individual I’m waiting for the day that he’s served his karma on a plate. His marriage is failing so I think it’s about to happen anyway. A lot of the rumors on his website aren’t even verified..so you could be living a wholesome life as a teacher or what not, and some jealous hater can post a lie about how you’re sleeping with people’s husbands and tarnish your reputation, Nik will post it not caring if it’s true or not.

  239. Lo says:

    money doesn’t buy class obviously..

  240. lil_tm says:

    Re: thedirty.com

    Now that is some trashy reading!
    And it is also a great reminder of why you should be very careful who you share your private info with.
    The feeling I get is most of those girls have no self respect and hang in circles with low class individuals.

    As the old saying goes…Ya hang with dogs, ya get fleas! 😉

    I don’t get the point in berating people for fun. They should change the name of the site to meangirls.com

  241. Lo says:

    Petite….GROSS what is wrong with people????

  242. SugarySpicey says:

    I should correct my statement to: “I like married men who want to stay married.” And, in my circumstances I certainly won’t be falling in love and going all crazy (or making up lies about being in the hospital). So in the situations I select married men = less likelihood of drama. Your results may vary.

    Capitol P – went and searched my name on The Dirty, all clear. I’m not super concerned, but I mentioned on my blog about the guy who threatened to post nasty things about me online, so I occasionally Google myself to see if he did. Is there anything more euphemism sounding than “Googled myself.”

  243. lil_tm says:

    “yeah lil tm if a guy like this is on okcupid then im a believer.”

    Since he still tries to contact me and make things right, I try to trick myself into believing the only reason he seemed so good in bed was because I hadn’t had any in two years…after my husband died. But, if someone is at the forefront of your spank bank(hehe), you know they did something right. It is Oh-So-Tempting to go running when he calls, but I know it’s for the best. We’ve been playing this silly game for years now. I’ll never give in because he hurt me, but again, it’s hard not to sometimes.

    @Diana
    I agree. No picture, no response. Sometimes I’m tempted to respond and ask if they’re invisible or if they look like the elephant man just to be a smart ass, but I usually just ignore.

    Re:Winking. Yes..it’s like a guy IRL being attracted to you, but instead of having the guts to approach, he buys you a drink but never comes to say hi and instead just stands back gawking the whole time.

    @Spice
    Married men can involve drama for sure. For one thing, most relationships do involve drama in some way, shape, or form. It could be the SB starts to get emotionally involved after seeing each other for a while and is torn between her caring for the man and the fact that he will never leave his wife. I prefer to steer clear of an accident waiting to happen.

  244. Treasured says:

    Couldn’t resist!

    I think I just have found Santa on SA!!! Proves it IS for everybody!

    553736

    And, Dorky, forum Nazi – shut up, for goodness sake! I just had to share this one!

  245. Treasured says:

    Question:

    I have “hidden” my profile on SA, yet I still get messages.
    I thought hiding my profile means it is not available for search?

    I do not want my profile to show up on SA, but I don’t want to delete it too yet (took a lot of time to write it up and don’t want to do it again).

  246. DianaSBinOC says:

    @PetiteSweetie

    Kiss and tell .
    ” After showing me some pictures of his traveling and his work info… We made out, Well, I thought it’s okay to kiss a little. He asked me if I like vibrators and toys. Of course I said yes. Surprisingly he pulled out a black bag and took out a huge purple toy and said let’s put the battery in here, it’s new. I looked at that thing and got goosebumps lol. It was dirty with some linens and residues on it… used toy obviously . I was hurry up and leave within that minute. For health’s sake, he’s a doctor! making >1mil/yr, and I drove 3 hrs to visit him!! What an idiot! I’m still laughing all the way back home.”

    I really don’t know what is wrong with guys attempting to pull out the “ex’s toys” gross. If he makes over 1 million he needs to go shopping with his sugar baby but umm…. when she’s actually HIS sugar baby not meeting for the first time.

    Geeze wtf is wrong with people? I still feel sick reading “residue” eww.

    I actually had a pot ask me to drive to Corona for a first meet. It’s a terrible sitting in traffic for 2 hours, bumper to bumper drive. Just based on how he spoke to me I already knew his allowance offer was probably in the $400 a month range. To make matters worse, he was obviously married and he had fake pictures dated circa 1975. I actually told him if he’s going to use fake pictures that he’d at least be wise enough to use pictures within this decade.

    I couldn’t even be mad I was laughing so hard lol.

  247. PetiteSweet says:

    Kiss and tell :-).
    So, this is my second week posting my profile. Went to see a potential SD today. He is an MD, director of a big facility and many other medical businesses… I was invited to visit his office. A genius really (I’ve done my research on him). After showing me some pictures of his traveling and his work info… We made out, Well, I thought it’s okay to kiss a little. He asked me if I like vibrators and toys. Of course I said yes. Surprisingly he pulled out a black bag and took out a huge purple toy and said let’s put the battery in here, it’s new. I looked at that thing and got goosebumps lol. It was dirty with some linens and residues on it… used toy obviously . I was hurry up and leave within that minute. For health’s sake, he’s a doctor! making >1mil/yr, and I drove 3 hrs to visit him!! What an idiot! I’m still laughing all the way back home.

  248. Principium says:

    TheDirty.com

    A repugnant site which peddles in salacious gossip (anyone can submit anyone) for the purpose of “outing” the average nobodies! A Perez Hilton or TMZ of the Z-List celebrities and anyone in the populous. While I admire the entrepreneurship of Mr. Nik Richie (real name: Hooma Abedi Karamian) he trades in smut and as a matter of fact he has been known to expunge any records of a submitted person with access to sharp and aggressive lawyers (factual statement: there were many stories of the then GF and now wife of the Penthouse magazine publisher and Adult Friend Finder sites, Marc Bell) Sometimes the freedom of speech in this Country is a real kick in the pants! Poor little guy who can not defend himself against slander & libel, like one would get gutted in the British high courts!

    [img]http://thedirty.com/search-results/?cx=partner-pub-5856085161968022%3A3032050869&cof=FORID%3A10&ie=UTF-8&q=sugarbaby&sa=Search[/img]

    Enjoy the reading Sugars 😉

  249. DianaSBinOC says:

    I like married men, you know they aren’t going to pull any drama!

    Not always the case. A married man from a SD site keep texting me when his johnish desires were turned down. I actually thought is this guy really that stupid to play around contacting me like that? This is the same guy that was sleeping with his nanny.

    Some people that cheat like the thrill of not being caught. Then there are others that move that danger bar higher and higher. I was so close to waiting until it was late at night and calling him back just in hopes the wife picked up. Oops. Instead I took the high road and blocked his number only to receive a nasty message on the site.

    I also forgot to mention his profile stated divorced but I asked him just to be sure and that’s when the fumbling started. Once I knew I said well that’s not for me. He continued on with his grotesque sales pitch which again I politely declined. Then I received the crazy stream of text messages.

    When does not interested go unnoticed?

    It’s clearly written on my profile that I have no interest in dating the married SD. How he missed it, lied on his own profile and keep pushing to keep contact doesn’t make sense.

    There is a guy on SA (fake SD) that was outted on The Dirty for similar behavior. I believe his wife already divorced him.

  250. FatBastardSD says:

    @Principium

    Spot on with your approach to messages/email. I don’t see the value wasting time with elaborate messages. I try to set up a short 1/2 hour meet as soon as possible through email. If there is no connection from either party move on the the next candidate, and don’t look back.

    I does seem that the goals of SD’s/SB’s are diametrically opposed on the SA site.

    SA as an online community will attract large numbers of SB’s/SD’s who use the site as a wish fulfillment fantasy. From the SB who believes her superior appearance/charm/intellect can justify an allowance and yet works a minimum wage job, to the SD who believes a SB will date him or f*uck on the first meet while being less than successful with these tasks IRL.

    Add in the intentional scammers (who are too stupid to do a good job of it) and the SA site can seem like a disaster.

    A HUGE advantage of the site is that it allows for fist contact while protecting one from a potentially embarrassing situation which could occur IRL as, on some level , everyone on the SA site is playing the same game.

  251. SugarySpicey says:

    I like married men, you know they aren’t going to pull any drama!

  252. DianaSBinOC says:

    @lil_tm

    “Tell me, would you be interested in dating a married man?”
    I never responded, but why on earth would I waste my time with a married men when there are so many single fish in the sea?”

    I was always annoyed being contacted by married men on regular dating sites. I just felt like what would even be the purpose of you in my life? Some would be upfront others would do the no picture thing. On a regular dating site that’s practically dating suicide. No picture= no response.
    ————————————————————————————————————-
    “The other, I prefer. He comes here once a month and wants a companion for when he is in town. Better looking, younger and I like the idea of not having someone demand too much of my time at first. He also doesn’t seem flakey, which is a pet peeve of mine.”

    I have to say the younger SD’s I’ve had were sweet and very generous. I just received a message from a gentleman that wants me to meet him in China next week. I was thinking not only is that sooner than I’ve ever met anyone on a regular dating site, but hopping a plane after a few days of conversation just doesn’t seem all that exciting to me. There was also the very strong feeling that his message was completely copy and paste. Everything was so vague ” your profile caught my attention” + you’re amazing”. lol

    —————————————————————————————————————

    ” The others, I wouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole. Also, don’t understand why some of them send a wink. Just say somethin’!!”

    I disabled winking for this very reason. It makes me feel like someone tapped me on the shoulder. I turn around to say “yes??” and they’re just sitting there looking at me. lol

  253. SugarMeSpicey says:

    And your proposed approach, Capitol P? Other than the neighbors wife? 😉

  254. Principium says:

    For the record and at the expense of repeating myself, traditional online dating sites for the more established men (insert your own definition) is a complete shit show!

    Why would I want to be a part of the majority herd mentality adding another message to a woman’s inbox already filled up with incessant email messages? I have cruised sites such as OKCupid candidly speaking most of those women score less than 7 in a visual realm and IRL will have some stiff competition on a purely visual scale, from some other woman at an upper scale bar, restaurant, social events, concerts, art galleries, etc. Traditional online dating sites are good portals for guys between 25-39 YO where the general minimum age rule of 1/2 the age plus 7 applies (18 being the min acceptable age) As an example in traditional dating, a man who is 35 years of age should not look for someone younger than 25 to cultivate a serious relationship (35 / 2 + 7 = 25)

    A sugar relationship does not start on a premise of seriousness whereby factors such as status, prestige and power (social dominance, not size of the biceps) overcome the conventional desire toward age proximity for the purpose of re-creation. As stated in my earlier post, the idea of DYI online SD/SB site seemed and sounded like a winner, but when the veneer was scratched off, it is evident that the male/female objectives and expectations have become of diametrically opposing values.

    My opposition to conventional online dating is merely for my own demographics and older. However if you are either male or female and also under the age of 40, while aspiring to marry and have a family of your own, I would recommend traditional online dating as a complementary tool to your RL dating options.

  255. Lo says:

    yeah lil tm if a guy like this is on okcupid then im a believer.

  256. SugarMeSpicey says:

    Liking the new pic, ‘P

    TM – The traveling SD can be fun, you get to feel like your on vacay one weekend every month, and rack up the frequent flier miles.

  257. lil_tm says:

    Happy Cinco de Mayo everyone!

    @Lo-okcupid is how I met the guy I spoke of in the last blog who knocked my socks off(the scrub lol). I’m fairly certain I’ll never find anyone that good in bed again.:( As far as dating sites go, there are some quality guys on there.

    A few weeks ago, I went to brunch and a couple days later I received a message from a guy on there. He said, “I know this seems strange, but did you eat at XXXXXX this weekend? I noticed a girl walking in and when she did, everyone turned to watch her passing. I saw you on here and couldn’t help but contact you. Tell me, would you be interested in dating a married man?”
    I never responded, but why on earth would I waste my time with a married men when there are so many single fish in the sea?
    I don’t see the point in dating someone if there’s no potential for it to go anywhere.

    In other news, quite a few pot SDs contact me yesterday and two of them seem promising. One lives in another southern state and would like to have an arrangement where I fly to him one weekend per month and him to me one weekend per month. I read his profile and he seems to be looking for someone with a little more time than I have, so I mentioned it to him and that was his suggestion. We’ll see. I know a lot of them want a travel companion and a live in SB, but I don’t have that kind of freedom.

    The other, I prefer. He comes here once a month and wants a companion for when he is in town. Better looking, younger and I like the idea of not having someone demand too much of my time at first. He also doesn’t seem flakey, which is a pet peeve of mine.

    The others, I wouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole. Also, don’t understand why some of them send a wink. Just say somethin’!!

  258. Principium says:

    Just some thoughts after reading some of the comments:

    I often escalated communication onto the other side of the fence, away from SA, after the 2nd replay from a POT where in my 3rd SA email I would either just give out my email address as my preferred method of preference or would ask the POT what her preferred method of communication was (I would be more forward in most cases and just give out my email address, usually as throw away one for this purpose and after having received one direct email, I would then respond from an email which is of a more permanent address… Some of you have that email address)

    The guys also play the Google sleuth role and try to find out information by simply researching email addresses and phone numbers. During my first two stints, I found out about 3-4 POTs who were also escorts (very silly to use one’s main cell number for escorting purposes rather than a throw away phone, because most hotels are also known to Google search phone numbers of single occupied female guests. Fact!) Further, you’d be surprised as to how many people you could find selling personal stuff on Craigs List (none hookers), looking for roommates, apts, etc; by researching their phone numbers.

    Wishing to escalate the conversation beyond SA is not tantamount to being a fake SD. I personally did not wish for a POT to know when the email was being opened & read. Why give away a part of one’s strategical advantage? We all know that online “dating” is already tilted in the favor of the fairer sex. Having read the blogs for the past month or so, I have come to the conclusion that most men on SA (not the blog) are either the sex pest types or P4P “personalities”, therefore my abstinence from participating in Sugar online style. If one is often judge by the company he unwittingly keeps, then best to exit the stage ASAP when the evidence become blatantly obvious.

    In closing, I also have a similar story about a very wealthy TFB (who I knew personally) who was notorious for dropping a wad of 5K on a table at clubs to be awarded to the first girl who’d go to his limo to give him a blowie! This kind of behavior is one of dominating and peacocking nature. Ever heard of rappers “making it rain” at strip clubs?!

  259. SugarySpicey says:

    Flyer – those messages are so hot, how could I get anything but?

  260. Lo says:

    anytime flyr 😉

  261. fltyr says:

    @ SS “Please send me all your pervos, your c*ck shots, your requests for face sitters and chest shitters. I loves me a good, revolting message.”

    Obviously you are looking for a spiritual uplift from the daily news

    @Lo – thanks for the encouragement…………..

  262. SugarySpicey says:

    Jersey, remember, I use SA first and foremost for inspiration. That messages gets my creative brain spinning: who is this guy, how would he act in real life, yadda yadda. Please send me all your pervos, your c*ck shots, your requests for face sitters and chest shitters. I loves me a good, revolting message. Sometimes I reply out of sheer curiosity.

    Although, I may have just spent the past hour messaging with someone very promising, without the slightest hint of kink.

  263. Jersey Darling says:

    Spicey, you like messages like that? I hate them! We should just swap messages from potentials.

  264. SugarySpicey says:

    And this type of message is why I love Subbys. Unfortunately, his pic makes me think he’ll try to keep me in the basement and turn me into a skin suit.

    Hello Goddess,

    Your are so perfect and superior! If I gave you a million dollars what would you do with the money? On a scale from 1-10 with 10 being the kinkiest, how kinky are you? Do you get turned on by being dominant?

    Your worshipful xxxxxx,

  265. Lo says:

    yes it’s tough. And yes one of the grad schools I’m applying to is right next to him…..we’ll see where fate wants to take this

  266. SugarySpicey says:

    Lo – That sucks! Maybe grad school will pull you up North? If it weren’t for distance (well, and the wifey but that’s another issue entirely) I’d still be with my first SD that I talked about. Long distance is so hard to maintain.

  267. Lo says:

    he lives 8 hours up north in the bay area ): he won’t do long distance. He’s caused me lots of heartbreak over the last few years but he’s a unique package of amazingness and someone I actually would have feelings for. No one else here in the socal area has come close unfortunately.

  268. SugarySpicey says:

    Lo – if he’s the crush of your life, and he’s looking, why not contact him and make something happen?

  269. SugarySpicey says:

    Ohhh! Just got a message I’m very interested in. It appeals to the old Spicey and the new!

  270. SugarySpicey says:

    I’m with you Lo, Flyr’s messages are always a bit sexy.

    Switched to Beta Test 2 this morning.

    Foot Photo = 13 messages, 1 I replied to, turned out to be my college professor. 1 outgoing message sent and a reply I couldn’t quite interpret.

    Switched to a playful photo of my legs, four messages received in about two hours of having it live, one I’ll probably reply to. Another I’m considering. And, one from a guy I’d probably hump IRL but his profile gives the feeling he’s not willing to play the “arrangement game” and is instead looking for a girlfriend, so not for me.

  271. lil_tm says:

    “So yes there are those people out there but my guess the odds are 10:1 that this is not one of them. The other side of the story was that he was prone to instruct his starlet looks wife to provide oral to his male friends while he took pics. By mid 30′s dad had him put away in a mental institution to keep him from further tarnishing the family name. There are a bunch more stories but you get the idea, not your normal male creature.”

    Sounds like a real gem, this guy. 😉

    For one thing, I would never fly to another state to see someone that I’ve never met before. Especially someone who doesn’t use a caps lock key.
    The other thing is that even if this offer were legit, my instincts are telling me to stay away and so that’s what I will do. :)

  272. Lo says:

    I hope you know that you turn me on when you type

  273. Lo says:

    thats sexy fltyr

  274. Lo says:

    just caught the crush of my life who lives up north on okcupid…ouchy…

  275. DianaSBinOC says:

    I do enjoy the subs:) Men in panties? sexy!!

  276. Spicey says:

    FatiB who didn’t believe I was going to share the bad with the good. That one was for you.

  277. fltyr says:

    Lo – from about 150 comments ago yes

  278. fltyr says:

    @lil “I received this gem today. I know you all will surely be jealous.

    hey i dont like to waste time

    i think your hot and i wanan hookup with u

    id love to fly you out to nyc for the weekend to play

    ill pay you 5g plus travel expenses

    if we like each other we can do it on a regular basis maybe once or twice a month

    let me know if your interested and lets skype before

    tarik”

    In another life I spent some social time (required by business) with the son of a major oil magnate. He was prone to ask newly met women (3 min) to spend the weekend with him for $20K and would put on the table for all to see. It was purely a domination show. .

    So yes there are those people out there but my guess the odds are 10:1 that this is not one of them. The other side of the story was that he was prone to instruct his starlet looks wife to provide oral to his male friends while he took pics. By mid 30’s dad had him put away in a mental institution to keep him from further tarnishing the family name. There are a bunch more stories but you get the idea, not your normal male creature.

  279. fltyr says:

    @ ?? “What probably irks me more is the immediate email ploy. I always have this feeling the person is desperately trying to cancel their membership because they can’t afford it. Another thought is that they are seeking undivided attention from scores of women while blocking them from finding a real SD ie the true cock blockers.”

    The alternate explanation is that he may prefer not to be logged into SA at the office (or home if he is married) . I would get a throwaway email address and go with the flow.

    It is also a pain in the butt to check SA mail from an iPhone

    Sending him back to SA to communicate with you is like the BMW dealer sending a potential customer to the auto show to get some information on BMWs (I use BMW only as they are one of my least favorites ). You may be better off shortening the communication channel.

    I agree it is not common to exchange emails after one exchange on SA but after a couple, if there’s not a sense that he’s a tire kicker, email serves both better. You can always flag his email as span and let him know that it’s done if necessary.

    Best to exhibit that you have lots of values and just a few rules

  280. lil_tm says:

    hmmm…vanilla scrotum…first I’ve heard of this. And I used to be a cook, so I may have to introduce this to my kitchen and try it on for size. Ideas running wild..

  281. SugarySpicey says:

    And one man’s vanilla gets boiled and poured over his testicles…there’s an ass for every saddle.

  282. lil_tm says:

    One mans kink is another mans vanilla.

  283. Lo says:

    gotcha–and speaking of men in panties.. I wonder how Kayte Walsh’s sex life is shaping up considering Kelsey Grammar is a sissy as reported by Camille.

  284. SugarySpicey says:

    Lo – I only do what turns me on, and seeing a man in panties just doesn’t do it for me. From my “Domme Pedestal” it’s about me, not the subby, so I do what I want, and he complies. It’s 100% about my wants but just watching the subby closely when they’re in their subspace to be sure he doesn’t let things go too far for his tolerance.

  285. Lo says:

    Btw I’ve been researching supplements that can help lower libido for us single people. I’ve come up with circumin, ashwaghanda, and green tea extract so far. Feel free to be a lifesaver and add to this list.

  286. Lo says:

    why not siffication? There’s a huge market for that. And what about CFNM?

  287. SugarySpicey says:

    Power play is very individualized. I love to be restrained and I like a little (okay a lot) of pain from someone who is an experienced Dom, who won’t leave marks. I don’t do deprivation, degradation, or blindfolds. On the other hand, when I switch and take a Domme role, deprivation and blindfolds are some of my favorite games. I don’t do watersports or bloodsports at all, or sissification. No two kinks are exactly alike.

  288. lil_tm says:

    I actually dated a Domme outside of the sugar world. We tried some stuff and attended some things together, but I wouldn’t let him hang me from the ceiling or call me filthy names. Nevah.

  289. SugarySpicey says:

    TM – it’s about submitting to the fear of the worst. The piggybank fears being used, humiliated, and blackmailed. He fears it so much that it starts to give him a thrill. And then, viola, it becomes a fetish.

    Once you start dabbling in Domme the persona takes over and thoughts you didn’t even know exist (think your bratiest nine year old self) come out, and it gets fuuuuun!

  290. lil_tm says:

    Pathetic Little Piggy Bank?! LOL! I couldn’t say that out loud to someone without giggling like a school girl.

  291. lil_tm says:

    I’ve always wondered about the psychology behind something like that. Like, what makes a person desire to be degraded. Getting pee’d on, slapped across the face(ok, I admit I like a little of that), called vulgar names, etc. I feel this goes beyond a naughty spanking.

    I’ve been to a couple BDSM meet and greets and I only get a small portion of it. The rest is something I haven’t been able to grasp.

  292. SugarySpicey says:

    Lol, pathetic little piggybank is the nice way to talk to him when you’re trying to get on his good side in the intro email. Lol!

  293. Lo says:

    hmmm…well maybe I can bug Spicey for some material incase he responds

  294. Jersey Darling says:

    Lo, most guys who are into financial domination do it over the Internet. You have to really enjoy berating men though! I could never wrap myself around calling someone my disgusting little pay piggie.

  295. Lo says:

    I just messaged a moneyslave looking for a financial domme. He’s in another state so I don’t know if he’ll actually respond but figured it was worth a shot.

  296. Jersey Darling says:

    *is wearing pink right now*

    Haha… Memories!

  297. lil_tm says:

    TM – On the third strike we’ll call you a liar, insult your pink t-shirt, and make you post your IP address. Better mind your P’s and Q’s girlie.

    Ya’ll sure know how to keep a girl on her toes. Luckily I don’t wear pink so that’s one punishment I won’t have to be concerned with.

  298. lil_tm says:

    Generally I’ll receive a few more email plugs but those types tend to not really be serious in their sugar search. It’s seems to be more of a collecting numbers game but instead it’s email . What I find hilarious is that they’re still on the site several months later. If it’s skype , phone, IM then I’m more willing to see he wants to speed up communication instead of the delayed back and forth.”

    I don’t mind moving to regular e-mail immediately since I hope to get a real name that I can do some research on. 😉
    I figure the worst that can happen is I find after a few messages, they aren’t really what I’m looking for.

    As for skype, I think it’s a great tool because it’s always different seeing someone in action.
    That said, I’ve only had one Skype experience with a pot and boy was it strange! He lives in NYC and wanted me to come there for the weekend. Mind you, we had never met. I would never travel to see someone first. They have to come to me. We build to this! 😉
    Anywho, I told him I would not and he flipped out on me and told me this site ruins relationships and that he was considering me to be his potential wife and mother to his two children, etc. Then he wished me well and told me I would make a man very happy someday and he hung up on me. LOL. People are strange, I tell ya. Another bullet dodged. Whew!

  299. SugarySpicey says:

    TM – On the third strike we’ll call you a liar, insult your pink t-shirt, and make you post your IP address. Better mind your P’s and Q’s girlie.

  300. SugarySpicey says:

    When men push to email too soon it always seems to me they’re trying to get to the point when they can send c*ck shots. I hate the request for a phone call in message two. Slow down grasshopper!

  301. DianaSBinOC says:

    “Umm, even if you knew how to use punctuation marks, 6 hours a week for $500 per month. That is soooo sexy!”

    My punctuation is terrible half the time but when a SD has “graduate degree” it always leaves me thinking fake! lol

    This is the gem I received :

    “How are you doing today? i saw your profile here on the SD site and it was interested and if you dont mind can we get to know each other here is my private email” xxxxxx.”hope to read back soonest”

    He’s actually in his 50s.

    What probably irks me more is the immediate email ploy. I always have this feeling the person is desperately trying to cancel their membership because they can’t afford it. Another thought is that they are seeking undivided attention from scores of women while blocking them from finding a real SD ie the true cock blockers.

    I also get the ” I’m closing my acct”. With these types I just say “aww really?, well glad you found your SB”.

    Generally I’ll receive a few more email plugs but those types tend to not really be serious in their sugar search. It’s seems to be more of a collecting numbers game but instead it’s email . What I find hilarious is that they’re still on the site several months later. If it’s skype , phone, IM then I’m more willing to see he wants to speed up communication instead of the delayed back and forth.

  302. lil_tm says:

    At what shade of brown do you stop and draw the redline? Will you go full on Hispanic? Will you go Middle Eastern? Will you go North African? South African (none Anglo or Germanic) Or does the amount of allowance diminish and pacify your cultural & racial preferences, if your desired color happens to be green?

    Race is pretty irrelevant to me as long as I find the person attractive and they seem to be a good person. It’s what’s on the inside that counts, right?
    I’ve only been approached by one SD that wasn’t white..aside from OBL, that is.
    Two strikes, huh? I wonder what I’m out of when I hit the third.
    For the record, my best friend in the world is a gay man, but I find humor in stereotypical and politically incorrect jabs. If someone were to call me a honkey, I wouldn’t be offended.

  303. lil_tm says:

    Was he playing on the monkey bars in the desert? That’s the only way you can know if someone’s a terrorist.

    No, sent me a vid of him running through a crowded part of a city with a backpack with dyn-O-mite. Maybe I’m just being paranoid.

  304. lil_tm says:

    Why does he appear to be a terrorist? Because he’s ethnic looking? Tarik is an indian name.

    Because he looks exactly like OBL.

  305. Principium says:

    Lil_Troglodyte seems to have two strikes against her!

    Strike # 1: Politically incorrect use of the word gay

    Strike # 2: Implying that a fella with seemingly a name of Arabic origin, appears to be (look like?) a terrorist.

    Another SB opinion is needed in here:

    At what shade of brown do you stop and draw the redline? Will you go full on Hispanic? Will you go Middle Eastern? Will you go North African? South African (none Anglo or Germanic) Or does the amount of allowance diminish and pacify your cultural & racial preferences, if your desired color happens to be green?

  306. Spicey says:

    Was he playing on the monkey bars in the desert? That’s the only way you can know if someone’s a terrorist.

  307. Lo says:

    Why does he appear to be a terrorist? Because he’s ethnic looking? Tarik is an indian name.

  308. lil_tm says:

    I just looked at his profile and he appears to be a terrorist. Seriously..are there girls that would respond to that message?
    That’s what worries me.

  309. UtahSpicey says:

    I am confident that “Tarik” is 100% legitimate and has only “chatting” in mind for your chat session. Sounds like you’ve got TLA (True Love Always). Congrats on finding your generous soul mate!

  310. lil_tm says:

    I received this gem today. I know you all will surely be jealous. 😉

    hey i dont like to waste time

    i think your hot and i wanan hookup with u

    id love to fly you out to nyc for the weekend to play

    ill pay you 5g plus travel expenses

    if we like each other we can do it on a regular basis maybe once or twice a month

    let me know if your interested and lets skype before

    tarik

  311. UtahSpicey says:

    Sorry P, the Playboy email would be a definite ‘ignore’ from me. This Princess likes to be pampered and adored. I don’t chase boys who say the want to be Friends with Benefits … I ain’t going to get any of the things I want out of that.

  312. Principium says:

    How about this message (SB opinion only):

    Wow! You again! I keep seeing you on here, I’m just amazed that you haven’t set yourself up with a SugarDaddy yet! To be honest you are not really my type but I think we get along at time so, let’s just be friends with benefits. I’m not sure I want more than that, but I kinda get you, so would definitely be up for that.

    If any one of you feels tingly by my charm, please email Jersey who is currently my talent agent. She has vetted many good prospects for me lately 😉

  313. Jersey Darling says:

    Spicey, new leaf or not that message would make me want to hurl as well.

    There’s no legitimate talk about a connection in there at all.

  314. UtahSpicey says:

    Dorky Boo – Next time you login, can you email me? I want to ask you something. My email with gmail, above.

  315. Spicey says:

    Sassy, I know I owe you a blog about negotiating a sugar vacay, its in the works. But, I had something else on my mind instead when I posted this morning.

  316. Spicey says:

    Who says sugar babies aren’t well-educated and articulate?

  317. Lo says:

    still laughing…

  318. Lo says:

    so here i am Let’s see What’s in store foe me “

    LMAO

  319. Spicey says:

    You’re right Lo! I’ve been off for months, and even with just a shoe for my profile pic I’m getting messages. But they are typically like that one. Well, or my old college professor. Not feeling hopeful about SA round two right now.

  320. Spicey says:

    Here’s a golden quote on the homepage spinner: ” Im not about to give it any stars right not because it’s my first time on this site and my friend told me about it so here i am Let’s see What’s in store foe me “

  321. Lo says:

    NICE, is that guy new on the site by any chance? the quality of new sign ups has been amazing…take mine for example. One guy who just created an account this week messaged me this yesterday “C cup?”
    mind you my profile picture is nothing like my avatar…

  322. Spicey says:

    I know I’m trying to turn a new leaf, but this message I just received on SA makes me want to hurl:

    hey gorgeous

    I am married but looking for NSA and long term fun. I had a sugar baby back in texas and just moved here. We had a 2 yr relationship and it was awesome. I was helping her with $500 every month for tuition and bills. I am looking for a caring, and sexy girl who knows how to have good times and chill. Looking to spend 3 hours in an out of the way hotel 2 days a week during weekdays as I work the weekends. Let me know and we might click. If u want we can meet for a quick coffee and see if we click or not

    Umm, even if you knew how to use punctuation marks, 6 hours a week for $500 per month. That is soooo sexy!

  323. Lo says:

    siiigh so I have my eyes peeled for a new SD. The one from out of town is a flakey time waster. And ever since the stalker has accused me of having a wandering eye he’s been weird and passive aggressive. Normal stable SDs of SA feel free to message me.

  324. Lo says:

    also make sure to communicate exactly what changes you want during the preop consultation

  325. Lo says:

    I have heard he is one of the few good and conservative surgeons, and since yours will be a primary you should be okay. Conservative is good, you don’t want too much cartilage hacked away which could cause problems in the future.

  326. Treasured says:

    Hey Lo…

    Got an appointment with Dr. Basim Matti.

  327. Lo says:

    treasured welcome back. I thought you didn’t want the rhino? I can’t hate, would love an SD who could help me tweak mine lol. I would suggest the UK Rhinoplasty LookYourBest forum to research a little more on your desired surgeon…rhinoplasty is one of the hardest procedures to get right, the surgeons who get hyped up online just have a big marketing team behind them who erase negative reviews when they pop up, so just be careful and do your diligent research.

  328. lil_tm says:

    “As the user it makes you look at best unevolved, and at worst ignorant and insensitive.”

    Yes, I am a ruthless & toothless troglodyte.

  329. SugarySpicey says:

    Woke up with a unicorn bruise between my eyes and my mouth looks like I got into a bar brawl with a syringe of Radiesse. Somehow the football managed to miss my nose (since we’re speaking of them). But … ow!

    TM – it just isn’t a very currently acceptable usage of the word. Although the blog says everything, IRL I’d suggest cutting that phrase from your lexicon. It’s tantamount to calling an Asian “oriental” or a person of color “colored.” As the user it makes you look at best unevolved, and at worst ignorant and insensitive. I cringed a bit when I saw it, but wouldn’t have brought it up since it’s your choice.

    Treasured: Hey girlie! I think you’ve mentioned your nose on the blog before. So I imagine you’ve mentioned it to Daddy. Don’t be muffled, he probably heard in your voice that you don’t love it, so he’s being a man and trying to fix things. Just visit multiple doctors before committing, every surgeon has a different approach that may or may not be compatible with you.

  330. Jersey Darling says:

    @FatBastard, you mean you haven’t gotten the memo with my email address? 😉

    Puffin 532 at gmail

  331. Treasured says:

    Daddy is not quite a SD…. Well, he spoils me immensely… But we don’t have an arrangement as such. It started without any financial spoiling at all, actually…

    Hmm… I might not be with him forever, but I will have a gorgeous nose forever…
    So, It will benefit me, for sure.

    Jersey. You actually make some sense 😛 (JUST teasing!!)

    I am just a bit muffled by the offer. Not offended… I think he is just very honest. I know I have not the most perfect nose myself…
    He also offered to have something else done, which I actually REALLY wanted to…

    And yes, me on my profile pic.

    Oh well, an appointment is booked, so we shall see 😀 Treasured is on the way to be picture perfect 😀

  332. lil_tm says:

    “That is gay” is a common expression. Quite the level of sensitivity on a blog that discusses an arrangement many people would find equivalent to prostitution.”

    Agreed. If people are going to get butthurt, they need to invest in some of Spiceys gloves. 😉

  333. FatBastardSD says:

    @sassynsweet

    ““Whoa. Did you just use gay to mean wrong, bad, undesirable, inappropriate,…?””

    “That is gay” is a common expression. Quite the level of sensitivity on a blog that discusses an arrangement many people would find equivalent to prostitution.

  334. sassynsweet says:

    TM – yes, but that definition doesn’t fit your context (‘using strategy to make someone like you is happy?’)

  335. Jersey Darling says:

    Treasured, of course you should only do it if you want to, but I can see how you’d be taken aback. I wouldn’t feel good about a guy suggesting it to me if I hadn’t already mentioned it myself. That’s rough.

    That said, nothing changes the look of a face more than the nose and almost everyone who hasn’t had it done could benefit from the procedure. So as long as he hasn’t done too much damage by mentioning it, I think you’d be blown away by the results and should go for it! As long as it’s something YOU want.

  336. lil_tm says:

    “TM – you clearly are a man and not the Southern Belle your picture portrays … obsessed with trying to stick something up my butt.”

    Not obsessed. Just making a suggestion. 😉
    I am a Southern Belle but I also have the crass sense of humor of a man is all.

    “Whoa. Did you just use gay to mean wrong, bad, undesirable, inappropriate,…?”

    I believe gay means happy?

    @ Treasured
    If that’s you in your profile pic, you’re beautiful and I don’t see why you would need one. That’s kind of insulting that he would request that. Especially if you have no intention of staying with him for the long haul.

  337. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Treasured – That seems a bit forward for a sugar daddy then again I’ve read much worse. Hopefully he’s the vision of perfection because if it were me I’d probably start from head to toe on what he could fix, correct, change on his body.

    If this was something that you discussed earlier that you wanted to change then sure go for it. If not then I would be quite insulted.

    Other reasons I would not be offended include but not limited to:
    He has OCD- Doesn’t eat coffee cake because he hates seeing crumbs
    He’s in the medical field
    High Profile
    Male model
    Could be confused for a male model or actor.

  338. Treasured says:

    He likes me enough…. But, I think in his eyes there is no limit to perfection. And, if can be corrected and my face can be made absolutely perfect – why not?

    I was thinking about it before it. But not “let’s do it asap”.

    Ok, back to part time lurkerdom. Uber busy with kiddies/studies/SDs/Daddy

  339. sassynsweet says:

    Treasured – Do you want plastic surgery? Or does he just not like your nose/other things?

  340. Treasured says:

    Daddy just offered to pay for a nose job for me…. Actually he already has gotten me a consultation with a top rhinoplastic surgeon in London…

    And some other plastic surgery (does not involves boobs)…

    Am slightly stunned…

  341. sassynsweet says:

    TM – “using strategy to get someone to like you is gay.”

    Whoa. Did you just use gay to mean wrong, bad, undesirable, inappropriate,…?

    I also think it’s interesting that the automatic assumption was that I’m not genuinely interested in finance.

  342. SugarySpicey says:

    TM – you clearly are a man and not the Southern Belle your picture portrays … obsessed with trying to stick something up my butt.

  343. lil_tm says:

    “TM – the gloves are amazing for stroking sensitive places”

    Then why don’t you stick it up your butt.

  344. SugarySpicey says:

    TM – the gloves are amazing for stroking sensitive places.

  345. lil_tm says:

    @FattyBoomBahlatty
    Thanks for being realistic..it’s refreshing.
    Part of the excitement in getting to know someone is finding out what makes them tick. Not some contrived, pigeon hole notion about what they THINK that person should be like.

    @Spicey..you’re right. Ignorance is unappealing. And edumahcating oneself is always a good idea as long as it’s something you’re truly interested in and not something you’re forcing yourself to learn so can appear to be something you’re not. Nice gloves, btw. 😉

    And now I’m off to do more studying about ancient Egypt..something that truly appeals to me. Now if I could just find an SD with that same interest.(kidding)

  346. lil_tm says:

    “lil tm the poster you’re referring to has a forty year difference between her and her SD, so perhaps she’s reading up on topics that would give them more to talk about and sustain their arrangement, and so I just see it as a strategic move. Just like when you’re dating a new guy and you’re open to learning about his hobbies and his interests.”

    For one thing, that’s gross.
    For another, using strategy to get someone to like you is gay.

    And fake.

    I know I don’t look like one, but I guess I just have a hippy mentality. I think relationships should be all organic and shit.

  347. DianaSBinOC says:

    Haha lol bra mishaps. I do recall going out and appearing to have a second set of breasts on my waist. Let’s just say strapless bras are not my friend. lol Kinda makes me think of the movie Total Recall.

  348. DianaSBinOC says:

    @ Spicey

    Diana – after we topless jump on the trampoline. But, we’re going to need Jersey to sign a waiver first, those WMD’s could be fatal at certain verticals.

    Ok waiver must include nipples must be soft during play. If they are hard we’re all doomed. hehe:)

  349. FatBastardSD says:

    @Jersey Darling

    Where should I send the pics to?

  350. Principium says:

    * personal is private, duh! I meant commercial or business life :)

  351. Principium says:

    @ FB: that makes sense. I started posting on the blogs a week before I deleted my profile. Only DianaSB recognized me in here and also I think Sweetie had seen my profile on that rotating featured first page deal. Spicey recognized one of my pics from my past stint on this site, after the facts, again on that featured deal. I was also recognized by a friend of my Ex the last time around in the same fashion! Since I have nothing to hide and I do not have a “boss” in either my personal or private life, I don’t really give a rat’s arse but I originally started to sift through the blogs, because a POT SB I had previously met had mentioned the blogs and I was rather summarily dismissive of the whole blog notion.

  352. Jersey Darling says:

    @Spicey haha wow that is awful! I think you win!

  353. SugarySpicey says:

    Can’t say that I have Jersey. But my date’s corsage pin popped my water bra on prom night. Slinky Carolyn Bessette style red satin dress = ruined by a slow, greasy leak.

  354. Jersey Darling says:

    Haha, okay embarrassing moment I’ll share with you all…

    Have you ever angrily tried to adjust a falling bra strap where you grab it, try to pull it up quickly so no one notices, lose your grip and end up punching yourself in the face?

    I have… twice.

  355. SugarySpicey says:

    Diana – after we topless jump on the trampoline. But, we’re going to need Jersey to sign a waiver first, those WMD’s could be fatal at certain verticals.

  356. DianaSBinOC says:

    Yah warm and fuzzies!! aww it’s nice when girls make up:) Ok should we all do a topless group hug? heheh

  357. Lo says:

    LOL spicey..

  358. Jersey Darling says:

    FatBastard, when are you going to send me your pictures?! You and Spicey need to start a cold war…

    I’m just dying of curiosity!

  359. SugarySpicey says:

    Lo – two birds with one bone too, if you wanted to join us 😉

  360. FatBastardSD says:

    @Principium

    I was active on SA until recently. I think it is easier to post about the experience afterwards. If I was posting while seeking SB’s I might accidentally give out too much private information in the heat of the moment.

  361. Lo says:

    pretty sure Frank and gttenvy are active, they just haven’t been popping in as often.

  362. Jersey Darling says:

    I have an active profile.

  363. Principium says:

    @ FB: are you an active member?

    I wonder how many male participants on this blog are currently active members of SA? I know that I am not and I shan’t be in either near or distant future. I suppose that there are more female members of this blog who actively have a profile, is that the correct assumption on my part? (I recollect that both London G & Wosie who make cameo appearances in here are inactive)

  364. Lo says:

    I’m heteroflexible enough to be okay with that–then you can hit up P since we’re both in Cali–two birds with one stone 😀

  365. SugarySpicey says:

    Lo – it’d make me warmer and fuzzier if I could motorboat your jubblies.

  366. Lo says:

    there’s a lot of warm fuzzy feelings emanating from this blog right now…AND I LIKE IT

  367. SugarySpicey says:

    Wow! Jersey, never thought I’d get egged on by you. 😉

    P.S. – want to publicly say: Wish I could edit that post. It was mean and nasty, and I’m sorry.

  368. Jersey Darling says:

    Spicey, post the picture! Why not? Treasured made fun of me for not being able to fit into Agent P, so this is the closest I’ll ever get to seeing it 😉

  369. SugarySpicey says:

    Just took a Marsha Brady pigskin to the face. I imagine there are a couple sugars who might double click on YouTube to see that action in repeat. F*cking hurts!

  370. SugarySpicey says:

    But FatiB: Accuarate or not, that would still leave one with no idea as to whom Jack Lew is. And that has no redeeming social value. Not that one must know Jack. But, one will never wish that they didn’t know Jack.

  371. FatBastardSD says:

    If I had to make a judgement I would probably say that the weddings/social section of the NYTimes is probably the most accurate/valuable part of that newspaper.

  372. SugarySpicey says:

    FatiB, TM, Lo – Ignorance, in anyone, is not sexy. My advice had been to read the NYTimes, whatever section interests the reader other than the social/wedding pages, for 30 minutes a day. Not to pretend. Not to fake. But, to generally inform oneself about the world around you. Nobody ever regrets education, and it is the one thing that can never be taken from you.

    If 30 minutes of reading national news is so completely foreign to you, that it means you are “faking” then yes, you are probably not capable of carrying on general conversations about the world, and you will sound silly.

    To that person, my advice would be: read the New York Times for 30 minutes a day, until it doesn’t feel like faking. Wash, rinse, repeat.

  373. FatBastardSD says:

    @Lo

    I think you missed this part of my beautifully written essay

    “If the SB is interested in learning about what the SD does or it is a common field of interest between the two then of course that is a different story, but this is part of the elusive “chemistry” that everyone speaks of.”

  374. Lo says:

    I guess I don’t see the big issue. When I was sassysweets age I dated my older professor and I’d read up a little on concepts he would teach or news stories he was interested in before we’d meet—although I never pretended to be an expert I could at least ask related questions which would lead to conversation which then would help me gain knowledge and new perspective about things I hadn’t really thought about. It could be seen as a positive thing?

  375. FatBastardSD says:

    @lim_tm

    “I remember reading someone talking about brushing up on the stock market and being up on the Wall Street Journal in order to prepare themselves for conversation with a SD…”

    I agree with your point and advise just seems really idiotic to me, especially on a site that promotes collage educated women as it’s main attraction.

    First it assumes that every SD is involved in the financial industry, but lets extend this reasoning to the case where the SB is supposed to brush up on the area her SD works in.

    Suppose the SD has 8-10 years of formal education in a field of study (say running shoe design) and 10 of experience managing the Athlete’s Foot store. Does anyone really think a SB not familiar with the field can “brush up” enough to impress the SD? I mean SB are supposed to be collage educated, did they go through collage “brushing up” for their exams?

    If the SB is interested in learning about what the SD does or it is a common field of interest between the two then of course that is a different story, but this is part of the elusive “chemistry” that everyone speaks of. Otherwise this paints a romanticized comical portrait of the SB as a renaissance woman who must effortlessly jump from discussing the problems of finance to quantum mechanics while ignoring the reality that in all likelihood she is a recent graduate struggling to find a good first job.

  376. Lo says:

    flyr are you actively sugar dating? just curious about your status

  377. Lo says:

    Spicey’s breasts and thighs combined with P’s abs would make the perfect unicorn!

  378. Principium says:

    I feel that I’m being pimped out by the blog sisters!

  379. DianaSBinOC says:

    Lo is right, ain’t nothing new under the blog to discuss. So instead we flirt, fight, and fornicate.

    True words.

    Yes Principium and Spicey get back to it:) The blog seems so happier and lighter without negative thoughts on creepers.

    By the Way Principium stop dragging your feet we’re all dying for you two to meet.

  380. DianaSBinOC says:

    Who wants to read a link to a Sugar related discussion thread on T E R? I have to issue a R rating on that one and I know that DianaSB is def gonna blow up a few heart valves.

    Ohh don’t hesitate to post it. I posted one here a few years ago that I saw running through blogger. A sb that also escorts posted some insider info relating to the johns that seek unprotected sex and the scores of naive sugar babies that get pushed into it. What made it worse was that this nasty guy was posting their pictures of actual sex acts he was having with them. I mean what happen baseball card trading? Isn’t that fun anymore? lol

    I was so disgusted I actually hid my profile. I mean where is the mentor when it comes to that? You could actually see their face and the men were laughing at them stating wow and she wants to become a judge? “Haa after these get out I don’t think she’ll have much of a future”. It’s odd how in every photo the guy’s face was covered yet he had no issues sharing these young women’s identity with all of these strangers some of which could be dangerous . That’s been my point all along that some of these men that see escorts view all women as less than human. What doesn’t make sense to me is that they enjoy escorts so much why do they sound so pissed off in how they write?

    **breath** 1..2..3.. **deep breaths** lol I was seriously livid and apparently it still boils my blood.

    Geeze I think I need another dose of Spicey’s blog. I was walking on air until I just now feeling like I got shoved off a cliff.

  381. SugarySpicey says:

    ^ Lo is right, ain’t nothing new under the blog to discuss. So instead we flirt, fight, and fornicate.

  382. Lo says:

    blog entries i mean

  383. Lo says:

    also the topic of college sugarbabies has been discussed ad nauseam due to how many blog topics we’ve already had about it…

  384. Principium says:

    heel girl! You sound like a puppy in heat 😉

  385. SugarySpicey says:

    TM – it’s all just silly hyperbole, ’cause its fun to play and this is the best playground I’ve found. Two weeks ago all the men were tearing me apart for being a stuck-up, misogynistic, lesbian. But more posts like that and I’ll upgrade to the Agent Provocateur Avatar and I’ll really heat up the nonsense; non of us wants that.

  386. Lo says:

    lil tm the poster you’re referring to has a forty year difference between her and her SD, so perhaps she’s reading up on topics that would give them more to talk about and sustain their arrangement, and so I just see it as a strategic move. Just like when you’re dating a new guy and you’re open to learning about his hobbies and his interests.

  387. SugarySpicey says:

    Capitol P – Validate me! Validate me! Tell me how hot I am, or else I’ll throw myself at WISD! Pout!

  388. lil_tm says:

    “TM – Good thing I’m not trying to pick you up as my SD then. “

    Watch out, woman..you never know who you’re talking to on the interwebs. I could be an extremely wealthy undercover brother looking for his sugar baby under the guise of a chick from the South. 😉

    I am not trying to start trouble, although it seems like I have a tendency to be unconventional and go against the grain, and sometimes I think I do it subconsciously. Middle child syndrome, I guess.

    I am merely pointing out that in my short time observing the blog, I have noticed posts that reek of desperation, validation and are attention seeking.
    If that is what someone chooses to do, so be it, but there is some problems I see. Spamming the blog with it. If private e-mails are shared, I don’t see any reason why the blog should be swamped in it other than the need for attention and validation.
    And to me, this is a problem because the topics don’t really get discussed which is the point of all this, is it not?

    Another thing I’ve mentioned is that new girls will come here and read this and think throwing yourself at men and making yourself look cheap is the way to go about this and I don’t believe that to be true.

    I’m not trying to be high and mighty, but I know that’s how this may come off.
    I’m simply saying that if a girl truly has alluring things about her, the men will come to her without all the B.S. and fronting. I find people who are real rather than fake and phoney more appealing regardless of how they look or how they want you to perceive them.

    I remember reading someone talking about brushing up on the stock market and being up on the Wall Street Journal in order to prepare themselves for conversation with a SD and even taking it into account as part of an allowance. That sounds soooo ridiculous to me.
    For one, it’s fake. You either have things in common with someone or you don’t.
    For another, you shouldn’t have to be someone you’re not no matter the situation.
    Sure, some role playing and fantasy play and what not, but that’s a different thing entirely.

    JMO

  389. Principium says:

    The Erotic Review It’s one of the biggest hoormonger site, Splicey…

    Not really Lo. The Sugar thing doesn’t go down so well with a lot of those types (either the johns or the hookers). In fact the guy who started the thread is a BSing scumbag type and he gets lots of flack in subsequent discussions. But one of his main premises is about browbeating SBs…

    I won’t post anyway, but if you want it, you can either research or email me.

  390. SugarySpicey says:

    Ignorance Alert: what is this TER of which you speak?

  391. Lo says:

    on T E R ? Why am i not surprised…I can just imagine the classy comments coming from that thread.. “just throw these coed chicks a 100 and they’ll be down for anything!”

  392. Principium says:

    Who wants to read a link to a Sugar related discussion thread on T E R? I have to issue a R rating on that one and I know that DianaSB is def gonna blow up a few heart valves.

    ElGordito: You are one funny MoFo. Much respect my man 😉

  393. SugarySpicey says:

    FatiB – thanks! Mmmmmwwwwwaaaaahhhh! Imagine me rubbing my boobies all over your face. 😉

  394. FatBastardSD says:

    SugarySpicey says:
    May 3, 2013 at 3:20 pm

    “…I want to give an honest picture of my sugar life.”

    And I thought you did not have sense of humor. On the bright side DianaSBinOC likes it. You have brought hope rather than expectations to countless SB’s around the world.

    I am eager to read more!

  395. SugarySpicey says:

    Just warning though: it’s not all going to be sugar and Spicey, I’ve had a couple bad sugar jags, and I want to give an honest picture of my sugar life.

  396. SugarySpicey says:

    Ladies – you are too sweet, thanks Diana!

  397. DianaSBinOC says:

    Ohh Spicy your blog is a dream!! Btw smart move on the hyperlink. I just clicked your name and was instantly transported to a wonderful world of “oohing aahhing”. I’m dying to read what comes next!!

  398. SugarySpicey says:

    Sorry, Capitol, I ain’t going to Uranus.

  399. SugarySpicey says:

    Sorry Dorky, the pussies have put away the claws.

  400. DorkyGuy says:

    Anything interesting happening here? I heard rumor of a catfight… rawr?

  401. Principium says:

    I can’t wait till I read about Splicey’s trip to Uranus where she met with Khan Noonien Singh. That one should be an all time doozy…

  402. SugarySpicey says:

    Sassy, that’s so sweet, thanks. I’m sure the book is complete trash and one long run-on sentence. Lol

  403. sassynsweet says:

    I loooove Spicey’s blog, it’s exactly what I’ve been looking for! Every post leaves me super tantalized. Can her book possibly be this good??

  404. SugarySpicey says:

    I know Diana, right? If he only came with a trust fund I’d tackle him and beat him to the ground!

  405. SugarySpicey says:

    Cunny – So very generous of you to offer your brother’s house up for guests. But, I still fail to see what LaLa gets out of the arrangement. I may be a terrible guest, swimming nude and having loud relations in said third floor bedroom and all that.

  406. Lo says:

    lol sorry, I forget that not everyone is on a first-name basis with Naomi Campbell 😀

  407. Principium says:

    We are fraternal twins, not identical twins. I like basketball because I’m good at rebounding and he likes it because he’s good at 3 point shots. The point is that we both love, respect and play the same game, but in different roles. So don’t Ya be hatin on my Bro 😉

    @ Lo: if you feel left out, come join in. I’m an equal opportunity dog! And who the farg is Naomi?!

  408. DianaSBinOC says:

    But, I think I’ve just found my one true love:

    youtu.be/cdwoGgWp62U

    Geez this guy… whew..

  409. SugarySpicey says:

    Lo, who is Naomi, and who is this billionaire I should be backstabbing you to get to?

  410. SugarySpicey says:

    Cunny, if you and LaLa are twins, shouldn’t I just go straight to the source and play with him? Oh wait! He thinks me overripe in my old age. Can we please have FatiB in his hazmat suit in the closet? Please? With sugar on top?

  411. Lo says:

    Spicey meet up with p hun, you guys would be hot together.. The sexual tension is brewing from within my computer screen.

    In other news, Naomi and her hot piece of ass billionaire boyfriend are on the rocks. Get in line ladies! Behind me of course.

  412. Principium says:

    Don’t concern yourself with any beesness among men; woman!

    LaLa and I could literally have been twins separated at birth, for all you ought to care for! Just get your Tush over to LA and let’s enjoy the ride.

    Shall be play the game? 😉

  413. SugarySpicey says:

    Although, if I were staying with LALA then wouldn’t your layup be at his expense?

  414. SugarySpicey says:

    Lock me in a tower? How very Shakesperean Capitol.

  415. Principium says:

    I may ask SDinLA to put you up for a few days, and then sneak up into your room via the thrid floor balcony. I’ll have him deadbolt lock all other doors and set the security alarm, ’cause I don’t want FB to get an easy layup at my expense by just waltzing in. It’s either by climbing up the walls, up on the balcony and thru the French doors, or nothing!

  416. SugarySpicey says:

    Oh Cunny – But, I’m enjoying the chase so much! Though I do need to spend a few days in LA meeting with a couple potential agents I’ve been talking to …

    I’m going to run a Tri-part test: two days of foot photo, two days of red bikini, and two days of Spicey in the great outdoors – we’ll see if I notice a difference in traffic, response rate, response type, or general quality.

  417. Principium says:

    @ SuSp: Hey woman! I serenade you with Bocelli, toast you with Brunello Di Montalcino, made a reference to meet me outside of Tiffanys’ and all you take home from that is my kinky side? (I did ran with the Jelly & did command that you drop down and give me 20 ; ) ) A brother just can’t win with you and your so fertile imagination, can he?

    Yes, I did receive face photos of an angelic looking young lady, who reminded me of another angelic looking young lady back in the days whom I didn’t shag ’cause it would have been inappropriate at the time (even for me) With that said and my penchant for nostalgia, it is in high order that I verify this Sugar Spicey, specially the reformed “connection” seeking one.

    I’ll take one for the team Guys & Dolls. That’s how Principium rolls, “trust but verify” 😀

  418. Spicey says:

    TM – Good thing I’m not trying to pick you up as my SD then. 😉

    Diana – today’s post was for you. Though I think Sassy will like it as well.

  419. sweetie says:

    Oh, sassy, sorry to hear that! Good luck and hang in there :)

  420. sassynsweet says:

    Exam hell hasn’t even started for me yet.

  421. sweetie says:

    Hi ladies!!!!

    How is everybody doing?
    Exam hell is over, yeay!

  422. lil_tm says:

    When someone tries too hard to sell me something, chances are I ain’t buyin’ it.

  423. sassynsweet says:

    I want to read Spicey’s book! A book about sugar? Oolala!

  424. SugarySpicey says:

    As Capitol P can attest, I have such a wholesome looking face nobody would believe I was a sugar if I posted a face shot. One SD said I would be like f*cking a naughty Alice in Wonderland.

  425. SugarySpicey says:

    But, I think I’ve just found my one true love:

    youtu.be/cdwoGgWp62U

  426. SugarySpicey says:

    TM – for me it’s more a matter of increasing my odds, coupled with the fact that I won’t post my face. Since I won’t share a face shot, I want to increase my options (I don’t send outgoing messages except in very unique circumstances, like a man’s profile saying he wants to be a financial slave, lol). A good eye catching photo will net more messages, and then I’m in the power position of deciding to whom I respond. It will net a lot of creepers, sure, but it nets nice, normal guys too.

    And, I kind of like pervy guys … wink, wink Capitol P.

  427. lil_tm says:

    *their profile pic, I mean. I hate not having an edit feature.

    I laugh it off its funny, but I don’t want to seem cheap and easy. And I know I have sex appeal..I don’t need a picture to prove that.

  428. SugarySpicey says:

    Foot photos attract a type of SD I used to target specifically. :)))

  429. SugarySpicey says:

    So, my main public pic right now is actually of my foot (it’s a very sexy foot, but still a foot). There’s also a pretty innocent one of my legs in a sundress. Everything else is private, and yes, only my body. Which I explain when I reply to messages. I’m pretty interested in booty, so if you assumed that about me you’d be correct. Lol

    I don’t mind the rude messages – I just laugh and move on. It also attracts guys who just like sexy girls, because they’re eye catching photos. I’d rather widen my net and choose from many. When I use a bikini shot as my profile pic I get huge response, from every type of SD.

  430. lil_tm says:

    When people have a body shot as they’re profile pic, I immediately think one thing..they are only interested in booty. (no offense to anyone)
    I’m not saying they’re right and I’m wrong, I’m just saying that’s how my brain perceives it. I’ve always thought on a site like this, if that’s what my profile pic looked like, I would expect to get e-mails from rude cretins. And it leaves nothing to the imagination.

    Just like with regular dating sites. If a guy is shirtless in his profile pic, flexing,e tc. It turns me off completely.

  431. SugarySpicey says:

    Grr, apostrophe catastrophe was going to say brain’s impulse centers. grrrr.

  432. lil_tm says:

    People are already way to judgemental. I’d hate to give them another reason to be.

  433. SugarySpicey says:

    If I’d done this in college I think I wouldn’t have been a good SB. I graduated early and moved away to school at 16 so it wouldn’t even have been legal until my junior year. But, our Brain’s and impulse control aren’t fully developed until 25. I think I would have made a lot of bad sugar choices back then, and been taken advantage of by people who were old enough to know better.

  434. SugarySpicey says:

    Of course, if any dear boardies discovered a geographic breadcrumb somewhere, I’d hope they’d shoot me a private email.

  435. Miranda says:

    I was raised by a single mother, who gave birth to me at 16, and our family fell 300% below poverty level. Despite being driven, and my success in regards to accomplishments, I often would struggle due to lack of support.

    Thanks to seekingarrangement.com, in two weeks I will be graduating from college, with high honors, and a B.S.B.A. in Marketing. I also was just recently sponsored by my University in an international marketing competition, in which I placed third out of 106 original entrants. This would have no been possible without the guidance and support from my sugar daddy!

    I understand why many college girls are becoming sugar babies. However, I am surprised at the colleges with the most sugar babies! Definitely an interesting topic!

  436. SugarySpicey says:

    When my book went public I had to address the fact that family, friends, and anyone who would want to judge me for my sugar interests already had all that they needed in order to do so. And, even when my dad read a bit of the excerpt, the world didn’t end. I wasn’t on page two in the tabloids. Nothing happened much at all.

    I still use a nom de plume and my SA photos are only of my body. I blog from where I write – which is typically coffee shops and University libraries (having people around keeps new ideas flowing), and I have all my geotagging turned off.

    That said, if someone really wanted to “out” my blog. I’m a writer, I’m not concerned about how I’d address that “outage.” Others, in more corporate work have a different set of concerns. For me, it’d probably helps sales to have a little notoriety as the Salt Lake Slut. But, I’m very careful anyway … creepers and what not.

  437. lil_tm says:

    As for the new topic, I didn’t do this in college. I don’t believe I was confident enough as myself as a person back then to pull it off. I’m shy now, but I was super duper calafragalistic shy back then.

    I think you have to have a little bit of emotional grit to partake in this sort of thing.

    It’s also a good thing for me personally, because I wasn’t sharp enough to know what to look out for back then and it makes me shudder to think what trouble I could have gotten into.

    But I can see why girls in college would do this sort of thing. If it’s for necessities. I still say if it’s for a handbag or a necklace, let it go.

  438. lil_tm says:

    Regarding Photos:

    My profile pic is a girl who looks akin to me, but isn’t me and I blurred it out. Then, I have two private photos that are really me that I share if I’m interested.

    The reason is because I want to be discreet and my city is a small city. No telling who might stumble across me on here and I’m a private person and prefer that my business is not on the streets. 😀

    When I first signed up with my original profile a couple years ago, it was the real me. I definitely received more emails back then with real pictures, but I felt like I was constantly taking a risk that someone would notice me that knew me.

    I guess what I’m getting at is that being real works better than anything, but lets face it, most people put their best foot forward online and you quite possibly could end up disappointed with what comes after the initial picture swapping.

    That said, almost all of the people who contacted me based on my original profile have contacted with this one…it’s just taken more time. Local people, that is.
    Hmmm…Could be an interesting experiment.

  439. Principium says:

    Not one Uni in So. Cal or anywhere in CA! Closest is ASU, but I just can’t stand Zona in the Summer!

  440. flyr says:

    @Spicey Re Advice For Photos (several topics ago)

    Some of the best advice on photos ever posted.

    One word of caution – make you sure you test your photos to see what they look like when they are clicked. On some the area increases .

    Two great photo disasters

    When you clicked on the seductive girl in bed you realized there was a guy there too

    When you clicked you saw the minimally dressed aspiring SB and in the background a guy pulling his pants up from the floor.

  441. Principium says:

    On top of Splicey 😀

  442. flyr says:

    I think it’s no so much that more college females are turning to sugar as that they are using SA to either pursue sugar or just watch what’s happening. If college enrollment by SB’s is up 50% my guess is that practicing SB’s are only up 20%.

    Contributing factors – slower growth of SD population, more tire kickers and softening economy.

    Thirty years ago there were a lot of sorority girls who went to visit their “aunt Ella” one evening a week. It might have been the birth of don’t ask don’t tell.

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