5 years ago
I heart Sugar.

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It’s that time of year again.. and I’m not talking about the Super Bowl. I’m talking about candy hearts and red lacy things and chocolate covered everything. That’s right, it’s almost Valentine’s Day, the most romantic holiday of the year! But also the trickiest holiday for gift-giving, especially if you are in a new relationship. Here are a few tips from our posts from Valentine’s & Christmases passed:

Not every Sugar relationship is romantic, but you can still show your appreciation on Valentine’s Day. I could sit here and tell you that every girl loves to get a Tiffany blue box and every man loves a scantily clad women in brand spanking new lingerie, but I really want to hear what YOU think.  What’s the best way to show your Sugar Baby she has a special place in your heart? And what do you get a man who has everything? Everyone deserves a little love on Valentine’s Day, so spill!

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So.. what’s the best gift you’ve ever received? 

Leave a Reply

563 Responses to “I heart Sugar.”

  1. Lo says:

    wait you guys have had sex and you haven’t gotten your allowance yet collegesb?? You don’t need to be shy about asking for money, the site is setup so that us women are financially compensated in exchange for companionship AKA mutually beneficial arrangement. So by him not doing this or just compensating you with “fancy dinners” is completely missing the point. This is seekingARRANGEMENT you should’ve talked allowance on the first meet. That is what the first meet is for imo. Please don’t let this cheap john use you. This is what you do in this situation, before you meetup next time make it clear that you want x amount upfront before you guys do anything sexual. Either say what you want for the month or how much you want for each meet, and make it clear you’d like to see it in the beginning of the date.

  2. CollegeSB says:

    I have been seeing a SD for about 3 weeks now. He has already flown me out to NYC twice already and our relationship has recently become sexual. I have no question as to whether is legit or not because my stays are always at the W Hotel Union Square and we have gone out to eat a fancy restaurants , ordered room service etc. My question is how do I begin to ask my SD for money or to pay for things without him feeling as though I only want him for an ATM. I do not want to be the SB that he flys out, book a room at the W for, have sex, then leave. What do I do in this situation?

  3. Sexy Rican sexy says:

    WOW! I feel like I need some one on one time with a Psychiatrist followed by a script for xanax after reading all that. 😛 may I ask why all the fighting??? Does it seriously matter who wins an online battle??? Come on..lol life is too short

  4. babydoll says:

    dorky- haha ofcourse i have the london accent ! if it will make you melt is the million ££££ question! yes was planning to organize a drinks and chat with the other London Sb’s soon we have been too busy to catch up before xmas , but we will all be thinking of you guys when we do our first shot!!! you must come to London and we can all have a good night out in Soho loool
    bond girls? that would be fantastic,but we will only agree if you wear a speedo for a swim shot !!! hahahahaaa

    SdinLA- ofcourse you are charming! but dont forget no mention of ‘ boner ‘ on the blog hahahahaa , there are lots of ladies in the house, keep it for the bedroom !!!

  5. JustATequilaSD says:

    @ILWCG
    “Everyone got a sexy Avatar. I need to change mine .”
    I’m still trying to figure out the old one before you change it. I see the face and hands, but I can’t clearly tell the other thing.

    @Frank
    “If I pick a fight with jersey, do I get her email address as well?”
    No. Get your own original methods for picking up chicks. 😛

    @Dorky Guy
    The Betty White Clinic actually sounds like a great place for rehab. That is one funny old lady. She wouldn’t even have to put me in the will.

  6. JustATequilaSD says:

    @LolaK
    “Don’t fear the Kraken!”
    Were you talking to MY penis? Or were you still spooning? I think DG has named his Lil Dorky, and SDinLA hasn’t posted his.

    “pizza”
    Oh boy, another candidate for the Chuck E Cheese Rodeo. YEEEEEEEEHAW!!

  7. NC Gent says:

    Hey DG Tina Content et al

    I never wore my ring when I was out with my SB.

    On a side note, a few years ago I had a nice conversation with a woman at a wine bar in an airport. When she had to leave to catch her flight, she asked for my cell. I wasn’t physically attracted to her so I pointed to my wedding band. Without missing a beat, she said “that is just another woman’s stamp of approval.” Had to laugh at her perspective :)

    I am at LAX- maybe I should go look for a wine bar!!!

  8. RussianSB says:

    @I Love You West Coast Girl
    Find a sexy dress that show your legs ! Beauuuutiful legs.

  9. RussianSB says:

    @SDinLA: “maybe I am finally growing up and giving up on coeds? ”

    I dunno… maybe you grow up …
    I will talk to you in few hours when I finish to watch Madagascar trilogy !

  10. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

    “Our perception IS our reality”
    I wonder if you spent more on your co-Ed SBs or your therapist .:)

    OmG.
    Everyone got a sexy Avatar. I need to change mine .

    Jersey.
    I know why you did not appreciate Sophia and Monica comparison .

    Do you like Kim Kardashian more? do you have any Armenian blood ?

    Treasured.

    “my rose… Princess…” letters guy . Indian , married , Dr. K. … ?

  11. Stacy, says:

    That is adorable Lola!!

  12. LolaBabyK says:

    My newest pot SD just ordered me a pizza from 200 miles away & had it delivered :) SBs gotta eat! I think thoughtful things like that are better than any other kind of gift.

  13. Stacy, says:

    SDLA – re: my gay SD – we met on this site, and we have an arrangement, as part of that arrangement I pet and fawn. The sex part of an SD/SB relationship is just one, tiny component. I think it’s just a different permutation on SD.

  14. Frank says:

    The earth tremored twice, Mount Vesuvius erupted and now all is quite and serene in sugar land.

    If I pick a fight with jersey, do I get her email address as well?

  15. DorkyGuy says:

    @SDinLA: “maybe I am finally growing up and giving up on coeds? ”

    I dunno… that kind of addiction might require rehab. Maybe you should spend a month in the Betty White Clinic?

  16. SDinLA says:

    @RussianSB I can go to Vegas and get married in no more than 2-3 hours. Draw up a pre-nup. Divorced tomorrow. Find another stripper. Repeat. Voila! Not undermarried, not overmarried, but just right. 😉

    Re: you being too old for me… maybe I am finally growing up and giving up on coeds? 😛

  17. SDinLA says:

    @LV You might even find DorkyGuy wandering around inside one.

    @DG Don’t you NEED a cavernous box to accommodate your prodigious member? And my tardis reference was completely non-sexual, thanks for making every conversation prurient.

    @Stacy I have female friends who’ve acted as “beards” for gay guys. But if there’s no sex and he’s gay, is he really a “SD?” Isn’t he just “a gay guy who can’t come out and ergo is paying me to be his beard?” IMO that’s not a SD.

  18. RussianSB says:

    All snow is melt … am I still in Russia ? Early spring ?
    Mwaaaaajjyyyy

  19. RussianSB says:

    @SDinLA, I am too old for you and you are ”undermarried” for me.
    But, still, with your connections and my boobs we will get permission to make video on Red Square !

  20. Stacy, says:

    Actually, one of my SDs is gay. He flies me out to attend work things and hang all over him. He’s not ready to come out professionally yet. Country Club party for a Burberry jacket? Yes please!

  21. DorkyGuy says:

    As much as I am a fan of Dr. Who, if I am going to get lost in a cavernous box, it’s not going to belong to a man.

  22. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Mmmm you can find all kind of things in a Tardis. :-)

  23. LolaBabyK says:

    Don’t fear the Kraken! But, uhhh…you’re on your own with it, lol.

  24. Treasured says:

    I’m not sure I need additional visual to Dorky and SD spooning 😀

    OR, a reminder of ANY action possible 😀

    Trolllop!

    I am off to sleep 😀

  25. SDinLA says:

    @LV I’m like a Tardis, I may look small but I’m quite large on the inside.

    @LolaBabyK My hands are far too small to grasp DorkyGuy’s Brobdingnagian member, even if I wanted to. You’re welcome to take my place and try.

  26. LolaBabyK says:

    @DG “if you wrap the url in an [img] tag, it will scoot through moderation.” His Dorkiness comes to the rescue! I like geeks :)

  27. RussianSB says:

    @im_only_me
    Then check Harry Winston site :)

  28. LolaBabyK says:

    @Jersey “Until then, I have no desire to speak with you or read what you write.” Then DON’T hun, it’ll only keep the convo going.
    @Tequila “Get the money, give the honey, and enjoy the ride for as long as it lasts.” LOVE IT :)
    @Treasured “I am the only one who finds the picture of Dorky and SD spooning kinda disturbing?” NOPE!
    @SDinLA “there will NOT be a reach around.” What good is spooning without a little action?? 😉

  29. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    You must be very small SDinLA :-) The cat looks good. x

  30. DorkyGuy says:

    So I am Steve Martin! I’ll take that…

    btw, if you wrap the url in an [img] tag, it will scoot through moderation.

    [img]http://media.bradenton.com/smedia/2012/11/16/17/11/16GEOx.AuSt.69.jpeg[/img]

  31. SDinLA says:

    @DorkyGuy there will NOT be a reach around.

    @Tina Spot said to tell you he’s not speaking to you because you are planning on keeping innocent harmless cows on your land and then having someone else slaughter them to eat.

    @RussianSB I’m not the cat. I’m hiding behind the cat and the pedestal. Shhhhhhh!

  32. JustATequilaSD says:

    @RussianSB
    She’ll be defending herself just fine. She has my email now. Maybe this was my Machiavellian plan all along….

  33. SDinLA says:

    Add the usual H-T-T-P-colon-forwardslash-forwardslash to this, NO 3Ws then

    media dot bradenton dot com/smedia/2012/11/16/17/11/16GEOx.AuSt.69.jpeg

  34. Treasured says:

    Ahahaha. I did say “friends” 😉
    No one has said anything about “winning the heart” 😀

    Tina – have fun :)

  35. Tina says:

    @Treasured: nope, it will give me nightmares tonight. It’s a good thing I’m going out with my Mommy and Daddy for my special birthday treat here in a few minutes :)

  36. DorkyGuy says:

    Well there goes my plot to impress Treasured and win her heart:

    “Actually gay men are really a girl’s best friends Quite close to diamonds ” ~ Treasured

  37. Treasured says:

    I am the only one who finds the picture of Dorky and SD spooning kinda disturbing? 😀

  38. Tina says:

    @Dorky: Looks like I’m going to have to monkey with the fountain filter 😉

  39. JustATequilaSD says:

    Jersey has my permission for email exchange btw.

  40. DorkyGuy says:

    @Tina: no photos! What happens in SDinLA’s fountain stays in SDinLA’s fountain. At least until the water recirculates.

    @SDinLA…. now that I consider certain physical proportions, I have to be the little spoon. The mechanics are just impossible the other way.

  41. SDinLA says:

    @RussianSB So I need to have 2 more ex-wives before I can ask you out and NOT bring you flowers? 😉

    @DorkyGuy Big spoon, without a doubt. I have to be the big spoon or it doesn’t work for me.

  42. Tina says:

    @Dorky: oooh, can I come and take a picture of that??? And that’s an interesting question – does SDinLA like it big or small? 😉

    @SDinLA: I’m proud of you! Spot deserves one of my special dog cookies 😉 And the horse get sugar cubes and apples! :)

  43. RussianSB says:

    @SDinLA
    I like your style – you been off-blog long time, then you come , kill the troll, and defend JerseyDarling, who is obviously not able to defend herself.
    You are that knight in a cat skin …

  44. DorkyGuy says:

    @SDinLA: LOL! I am going to send you something special for V-Day… Maybe a hug! Wanna be the big spoon or the little spoon?

  45. RussianSB says:

    @DorkyGuy
    ”Do you think that maybe married guys have learned some skills (listening/communicating/etc) that help them to be more attractive than their single counterpart?”

    It is why I prefer guys, who 3 times been married, but now divorsed !

  46. SDinLA says:

    MmmmPhhmmMmmmPhhmmmm Mmmph Mmm Ummm Mmphphphph… Mmmm!!!! Mmmm!!!

    ::::SDinLA gets gagged and tied up by Spot and the horse with no name::::

  47. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Dorky

    Always good to hear that SD’s look for excuses. to find ways of say you are special.

  48. DorkyGuy says:

    @SDinLA: Thanks for not playing the Valentine’s Grinch. Your quote is absolutely correct. I think that V-Day provides yet another excuse to tell the special people in your life how much you care. And I’m always looking for excuses, whether contrived or not.

    @Tequila: “My invitation to open all SB” LOL! Freud would be proud.

  49. Treasured says:

    @ Tequila – so pizza and teddy bear comes BEFORE the rodeo! You should have said so before!
    That is all I am after 😛 AND the ball pitt, obviously 😉

    You can keep the rodeo 😛

  50. JustATequilaSD says:

    ***my open invitation to all SB’s***

  51. JustATequilaSD says:

    @SDinLA
    Glad to see the “you” back. I’d still like to get that AsomBroso, next time you are in the deep south. Actually, Don Julio is my current fave. I am being sincere, as this is an open invitation to all blog SD’s.

    My invitation to open all SB’s is a little different, and usually only discussed one on one.

  52. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Treasured
    No guarantees. I have turned down super-hot babes before. Start with pizza and a teddy bear. Enjoy the band as they play “Happy Birthday.” Sip cola through a crazy-straw. And then we’ll see what develops. Oh yeah baby, the mouse gets em going.

  53. SDinLA says:

    Back on topic…. Rather than be the Valentine’s Grinch, which is my wont, I shall simply post what D.H. Lawrence wrote in a letter long ago:

    “One must learn to love, and go through a good deal of suffering to get to it… and the journey is always *towards* the other soul, not away from it. Do you think love is an accomplished thing, the day it is recognised. It isn’t. To love, you have to learn to understand the other, more than she understands herself, and to submit to her understanding of you. It is damnably difficult and painful, but it is the only thing which endures.”

    @im_only_me No matter how much I as an SD would WANT to help my SB, I cannot read minds, so if you are not willing to have the discussion about what help you really want, what can I do?

    IMO a gentleman and a thoughtful SD will always bring this up early in the dialogue between two prospective matches. But if he has not, and there are many reasons why he may not have brought it up- some perfectly valid, others red flags to take heed of- you can certainly steer the conversation that way.

    Ask him if he’s had SBs before. Ask him how those arrangements worked. Say, “The reason I am looking for a SD is XYZ. As much as I enjoy being spoiled with nice meals, and spending time with you is its own reward, this doesn’t work for me unless I can find a SD who is willing to help me with XYZ.” If you explicitly state that you have an immediate need for cash to pay off bills etc., if he is genuine he will ask you how much you need and if not immediately agree to help you, ask you more about it- what you need it for etc. And there might be an ensuing negotiation… but you should not be afraid to initiate the conversation if he has not already.

  54. Treasured says:

    LOL!

    LOL!LOL!LOL!

    Deal 😉 Only if rodeo is included afterwards :p

  55. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Treasured
    ” share your email”
    I figured I’d be next on the banning gallows, so I wanted to make sure I had your email. We can go to Chuck E Cheese with next time you come to America. LOL.

  56. Treasured says:

    PS: Hope you have found mine 😉 Somewhere in the middle of the topic 😉

  57. Treasured says:

    Re rings. Yes, they do wear them 😀

    Tequila – well, not really 😉 I can keep my emotions under control. Most of the time.

    By the way, was there a particular reason you wanted to share your email with me? :p hehehehe

  58. JustATequilaSD says:

    @im_only_me
    Ok, so you would go out with this “super great” guy, even if he didn’t have the finances to help you. Does he just look this good or does he just make you feel that good? Get the money, give the honey, and enjoy the ride for as long as it lasts. Many sb’s here can give you cash extraction tips, and it would probably be easier than ending up w/him as your boyfriend and then going out to look for sugar elsewhere.

  59. im_only_me says:

    ** cont.** and by arrangement I mean with an allowance.

  60. im_only_me says:

    @lola I know that youre right. I’ve been offered arrangements but not by anyone I was interested in.. so I declined. I just need to get over it.. because youre 100% right

  61. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Treasured
    re: Imperfect
    Be careful, imperfect can sneak up on you. If people can fall in love with a crazy, dickish, I’m-not-really-Bob-Hoskins type, then obviously, imperfect works.

  62. im_only_me says:

    @tequila thank you! I’m not sure the boyfriend part is what I’d like.. but definitely someone I enjoy being around. fwb I suppose. lol

  63. LolaBabyK says:

    “although I know that a true SD would love helping me I don’t really feel comfortable discussing my financial needs with any of the people I’ve gone on dates with. UGH.”
    @imonlyme You’re probably not yet ready for sugar dating, then. It’s hard to bring up the topic, but once you’re used to it and realize that this is what SD dating is about, it becomes easier. It’s a “mutual” relationship, after all. And remember, there’s always a tactful way to approach this discussion.

  64. JustATequilaSD says:

    @im_only_me
    Sounds like you may be leaning toward “rich boyfriend” territory, which should still get you where you want to be. I think youre off to a good start. Congrats on your date.

  65. LolaBabyK says:

    “SD relationship – a person can be married, attached, emotionally unavailable or gay. Could not care less.

    A RELATIONSHIP – never.”
    Exactly.

  66. Lo says:

    men without integrity are NOT attractive regardless of other qualities they may possess.

  67. im_only_me says:

    @tina you know.. I never even noticed!! I’ll have to check on my next date

  68. im_only_me says:

    I have browsed the Tiffanys site to see what the fuss is about.. and I am sad to say that I didn’t even like anything on there.. sigh.

    As for the amount of sugar received.. I’m not really in it for the cash/gifts.. more just to meet people who aren’t the typical bums I meet in my daily life. I did, however, get taken to one of the best and nicest restaurants I’ve ever been to.. and in the company of someone I’d date no matter what his income. He has talked about me accompanying him on his business trips.. and I find him amazing enough to actually WANT to say yes.

    Unfortunately I have found myself in a situation were I actually DO need cash (not a lot.. about 1500) so although I know that a true SD would love helping me I don’t really feel comfortable discussing my financial needs with any of the people I’ve gone on dates with. UGH.

  69. Tina says:

    On a related subject – do the married SDs wear their wedding rings when with their SBs?

  70. Treasured says:

    Actually not exceptions. Accident, fate, whatever you choose to call it. Unfortunately all things and meetings in your life can’t be planned :)

  71. Treasured says:

    Dorky, there are exceptions to the rule… Hmm… But, it is too private for the blog 😉

  72. ContentSB says:

    @Tequila — True… but sometimes I think guilt creates an obligation to encourage fixing the marriage. It’s weird, but I believe that could happen.

  73. DorkyGuy says:

    @Treasured… How can a fairy-tale happen if you only pick guys who are imperfect?

  74. Treasured says:

    @WCSD – It is. It doesn’t have to be though :)

    Oh well, an innocence in me still believes that fairy-tales are possible :)

  75. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Tina and @Content

    It would be very odd to be with an sb that encouraged you to stay home with your wife and make things better.

  76. Treasured says:

    @Dorky – you would be surprised 😀

    Actually gay men are really a girl’s best friends 😀 Quite close to diamonds 😀

  77. WCSD says:

    @Treasure – Isn’t sugar in general shallow? You are looking at it as a job to get paid from, and he is looking for youth and beauty. Is one really less shallow than the other?

  78. Tina says:

    @WCSD: we all have our turn ons and offs, but honestly I think we overlook REALLY good “candidates” because of some preconceived notions that we have.

  79. Frank says:

    treasure-Honestly, just shows to me how shallow one can be. Unless he is looking into adoption hahaha

  80. Frank says:

    I have a double whammy, I’m married and my sb is married. We don’t talk much about our spouses, we always find other things to take up our time.

    Speaking of which, supposed to meet her later this afternoon, and I have already felt some tremors from Mount Vesuvius.

  81. WCSD says:

    @Tina – Just because we’ve matured doesn’t mean that we still aren’t overpowered by the second head way to often. And to add onto Treasured’s point, in sugar college age isn’t a big deal, in a real relationship, probably not. Myself, I’ve always considered myself an equal opportunity dater. Age, height, race, etc. are things I never worry about as a specific trait. Every person is unique, and I approach it that way. Now, do I have preferences? Sure. We all do. But I’ve been surprised more times than I can count with someone who doesn’t fit my ‘mold’ that I truly ignore it (most of the time).

  82. DorkyGuy says:

    @Treasured: gay? I dunno.. if I were a female SB, and I managed to flip a gay SD to play for my team, I would want props from somewhere!

  83. Treasured says:

    @ Tina – exactly!!

    After a while I started to make sure, if the profile of a 50+ guy says on his profile 18 to 25ish – it is a no no.

    Honestly, just shows to me how shallow one can be. Unless he is looking into adoption 😀

  84. Treasured says:

    Married men discussion.

    For me one HUGE rule:
    SD relationship – a person can be married, attached, emotionally unavailable or gay. Could not care less.

    A RELATIONSHIP – never.

    In a sugar relationship you almost look upon it as a job. I successfully manage never to attach myself to the guys. Also helps, that I always made sure I chose someone with whom I could not fall in love with. A guy just had to be a bit imperfect.
    Worked a treat 😛

    In a normal relationship, I know, that dating a married man is a straight road to the broken heart and being miserable. As Content have said, it can last a month or two, but then you want the cuddles on the sofa and the ability to call at 2am if needed.

    Simples 😀

  85. Tina says:

    @WCSD: maturity is a beautiful thing in its own right. What I find interesting is that we have SDs here talking about how much more they’ve matured with age, and the benefits of it, yet many still look for SBs that are college age……hmmmm….

  86. Tina says:

    I will have to agree with Content that it’s VERY easy (and almost necessary) to downplay/ demonize the marriage. She doesn’t give him the attention he needs, she doesn’t make him feel important, the sex isn’t there/is bad, she emasculates him, etc etc etc

  87. WCSD says:

    @Dorky – I’m not married (anymore). But when I was, I don’t know if they did or didn’t change after they found out because I never pursued it. I just found there seemed to be more available ones when I was attached.

    @Tina – That is exactly what I was trying to say in my post. I believe it is completely because of me, not because of them. My attitude, my behaviour, and my perception. I have found that at this point of being single it isn’t as bad, but maybe that has to do with being much more mature than the last time I was single.

  88. ContentSB says:

    @Frank — YES! hahaha

  89. Tina says:

    @Content: I’m lucky that my mom knows the person that I am, and doesn’t worry about me having never married and almost 35 😀

    @Dorky: yes, there is a bit of an ego boost when a married man would rather talk to / be with you instead of at home with his family. Been there, done that! And you do have a sense of competition with the current wife, since that’s the woman that can demand his time. My friend will have a conversation with me, and have to cut it off because his wife calls for him to do something. Even though we’re just friends, there is still that sense of competition there (mainly because there was a sense of attraction and potential between us).

  90. ContentSB says:

    @Dorky: Re: feeling superior. Ehhhhh…maybe?? I think in order to stay sane as the other woman, you would almost have to elevate the perception of yourself/your relationship and downplay his marriage in his mind. If that makes sense…? Maybe a better way to say it is you have to believe he thinks more highly of you than he does of his wife. Which brings it’s own set of unhealthy mental problems.

    Am I in therapy right now?!

  91. Frank says:

    Married man conversation= Yes dear!

  92. Tina says:

    @WCSD: I agree with you! But I think it has to do with the fact that you DON’T seem desperate, you DON’T come on too strong, and you also tend to go out more. Think about it – when you are attached, you tend to go to places that are not “singles bars”. So, you can end up meeting someone that isn’t really looking but is amazing and single. It’s weird, I’ll admit!

  93. ContentSB says:

    @Tina — Yeah, you’re right. Those key learned behaviors aren’t exclusive to marriage…but probably some sort of serious relationship. I really just want to tell guys my age to hurry up and GROW UP so I can be attracted to/interested in them instead of other types of men I shouldn’t be into! haha :) I mean really, my mother would be most appreciative of this so she could quit thinking I’m turning into a lonely spinster at age 23 😉

  94. DorkyGuy says:

    @WCSD: maybe I ought to dig out my old wedding ring. Question… do you sense girls’ attitudes change after they find out you are married? Are they more interested or less, after that discovery?

  95. DorkyGuy says:

    LOL! Loving the insight.. Is there a sense of competition? If you are approached by (or land) a married man, do you get an ego boost from feeling superior to his wife?

  96. ContentSB says:

    With married men there’s the allure of “WOW! He’s willing to risk EVERYTHING to spend time with ME! I must be pretty f’n incredible!” Nope. No, you’re not. He’s just that big of an idiot.

  97. Tina says:

    @Content: I prefer older men as well. When I was your age, I had the same problem with men close to my age. The good thing is that they DO grow up, and don’t have to be / have been married to do so. Although I have seen men that have been in committed relationships have tendencies to mature faster 😉

  98. WCSD says:

    Being able to find someone when attached – When we are single, it is SOOO difficult to find a woman, yet once we are attached in any form (married, exlusive, etc.) that attractive and available women are EVERYWHERE. Obviously it is completely about our approach (not being desperate, having no fear of rejection when attached) that causes this reality, and even realizing it makes it easier, but the reality still is there.

  99. ContentSB says:

    @Dorky — In the case of two identical guys, I don’t think one is more attractive, or less attractive, than the other. However, you did hit the nail square on the head with the learned behaviors. I’m often bored with guys my own age because they just don’t “get it.” They ramble on about their glory days back in college with all of those totally epic parties they went to (but don’t actually remember because they were SO wasted from all of the beer pong games, which they of course won, and now there’s a shrine built to them in a dingy party house basement made of solo red cups that every underclassmen now has to pray to, while kneeling in front of it, before playing a game of beer pong), or their favorite team (which is still an incredible team even though they haven’t won a superbowl, ever, but that’s ok because there’s always next year), or their bros (who ALWAYS have their back except for that one time a bro totally sacrificed his other bros in Call of Duty just so he could get a new high score. douche bag).

    Married men have a way of communicating that I have yet to find in other guys. They seem to know how to have substantive conversations about anything and everything, a more refined sense of humor, and in the face of conflict are typically better at talking things out instead of emotion-shaming, punching walls, and slamming doors. But really…what do I know? :)

  100. Tina says:

    @Dorky: for me, assuming the men were identical, the one that isn’t married is the more attractive to me. Why? The way I see it, the man who is married and looking outside of the marriage is less attractive when I’m looking for someone to have a relationship with. I feel that he hasn’t taken care of the business he needs to take care of before moving on. And I want someone that is emotionally available.

    With that being said, you don’t have to have been married to develop good communication / compromising skills. You can learn a lot from any type of failed relationship, not just marriage.

    For me, a married man I’m attracted to gets an immediate friend card and I try to back away as quickly as possible (it doesn’t always work the way I want it to, though!)

  101. Bella says:

    😀
    😀
    😀

    Date went excellently! Already planning the next one. Yay for me!

  102. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Treasured
    ” I hope it is not from you”
    1. Not the first or tenth thing I’ve said to you.
    2. The M-word is something I don’t talk about much, and you see how I say it.
    3. Since the email had no mention of rodeo, we know it’s not from me.

  103. JustATequilaSD says:

    @LO
    You’re not helping either, since you just HAD to say something. But I guess this doesn’t count since you were addressing a post to someone else. If you or anyone else find me annoying, that is their opinion and prerogative.

  104. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Hi Tina

    That is great news. I hope they arrive safe and look forward to hearing all. I do like roses. So enjoy them :-)

  105. ContentSB says:

    @Tina — Well…it was worth a try :) Maybe it should have been a broader comment saying “Hey everyone! Quit making destructive decisions!” Sometimes the irony of all of my rambling cracks me up haha :)

  106. Lo says:

    Tequila-You don’t care how many people told her otherwise? Yes because your opinion cancels out everyone else’s. I hope you’re not as annoying in real life as you are on this blog. And thanks for yet again digging up drama when everyone has said their peace and is over it.

  107. DorkyGuy says:

    @The Blog Bartender: I think that guy needs another one. This round’s on me. I’ll take one too.

    Question for Tina and Content… If you have two identical guys, one is married and one is not… Is the married guy more attractive? the same? less?

    Do you think that maybe married guys have learned some skills (listening/communicating/etc) that help them to be more attractive than their single counterpart?

  108. Tina says:

    @Content: if it were only that easy! :)

  109. Tina says:

    Hi LV! You’ll be happy to know that my roses are scheduled to arrive in the next few days (they’re in transit now!) Hopefully they arrive today or tomorrow so I have time to plant them before I start my workweek on Sunday! :)

  110. ContentSB says:

    Exactly. Hey you married men! Quit being so charming!

  111. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Hi Everyone.

    Waves x

  112. LolaBabyK says:

    I don’t love the idea of dating a married man, but I don’t think it would be a deal breaker. I think I’d just have to take it case-by-case. I’ve not ran into the problem yet, though.

  113. Tina says:

    @Content: thanks babe! I’m SUPER excited about the trip!!!! :)

  114. Tina says:

    And, I will have to add, that I’m not immune to the charms of married men. I have a very good friend who is married that, well, had some interesting potential. BUT, it was something I had to evaluate and decided that we were better as just friends. You can’t help who you are attracted to, but you CAN help your own reactions to the situation. I’m not judging, and know how hard it can be to resist someone that you have a genuine connection to.

  115. ContentSB says:

    @Tina — Thanks love! I’ve been meaning to get back to you! But I’ll just briefly say here that i’m SOOO happy for you!!!!! :) :) Things have really fallen into place for you, and I can’t think of anyone more deserving! Your trip is going to be EPIC!! 😉

  116. Tina says:

    @Content: well said dear!

  117. ContentSB says:

    Re: married men:

    I’m not sure dating married men is something anyone is truly truly into it. Sometimes it happens, and can have its great moments, but from what I hear it’s draining over time. I can’t imagine anyone wants to be a secret for a long period of time. Sure,it works for short-term arrangements, but how long is too long?? At some point I think we’d all crave a normal relationship…one where you can call your guy at whatever time you wanted, or cuddle up on the couch and watch a movie together whenever you wanted, or go out to eat without the nagging feeling you’re doing something wrong and about to get caught. As Guru says…Don’t fall in love with married men!!!!

  118. LolaBabyK says:

    @Treasured Not likely. He may be trying to depict himself through a generic photo, but I never really understood that angle. Cute, though :)

  119. LolaBabyK says:

    @SDinLA Only time will tell if it’s a reason I should have steered clear. It’s always a balancing act with SD dating.

  120. Tina says:

    I’m not into seeing married men; I’ve stated my reasons before. All in all, I am who I am and it’s just something that I choose.

    @Dorky: nope, I don’t think you’d make a good SB. But, apparently neither do I 😉

  121. Treasured says:

    Anyone thinks this guy’s picture is real?

    1256383

    Too cute 😀

  122. DorkyGuy says:

    I wouldn’t be a very successful SB. I couldn’t date a married person, and that would really limit my prospects.

    When I was actively looking for an SB, if her profile said she wouldn’t date married people, that jumped off the page to me as someone I might want to get to know.

  123. Lo says:

    I might be too empathic to do the married guy thing, I usually try to avoid them although I’m sure they are probably easier to have arrangements with.

  124. Stacy, says:

    Along the lines of sugar dating, what do SBs prefer? I actually prefer a married SD, they don’t demand as much time and devotion, and don’t need to introduce you to everyone as their trophy. I don’t mind the trophy game sometimes, but it requires a certain detachment from a situation to pull off acting confident when all the first wives (aka 20 years older) are hissing and baring their teeth.

    Thanks SD – I only turned up the avatar heat in response to all this “I’m so sexy” avatar madness. Anyone who’s seen my profile knows I do t need to prove anything with blog cattiness. Lol

  125. Treasured says:

    SDinLA – as I have said, I noted the tongue-in-cheek bit of your comment.
    So I was not peeved off in any way.
    I was just teasing.

    Being discreet: there are a lot of options, from coming out at a different times, to not having a public display of affection etc.
    It is part of the game if you are seeing someone married/someone who is worried about privacy.

    BUT, on the whole, I prefer not to be a secret.

  126. SDinLA says:

    @babydoll Hey kiddo. Charming? Moi? I can’t help it, being swave and dee-boner comes naturally to me. 😉 Hope all is well in the UK. Nice avatar!

    @Stacy …and Stacy turns the volume up to eleven in the avatar war! Hot stuff!

    @Treasured You’ve been on the blog long enough to know when I react to something it is usually tongue-firmly-in-cheek (unless it has to do with my anti-troll campaign) and if I’m cutting or snarky it’s not meant seriously. I’ve already said that I am sorry I chose such harsh words in parodying recent events. And I’ve commented on the usage of the B word in my locale. So again, if my words stung coming from a stranger, you have my utmost apology for that.

    I put pussy on a pedestal and am a white knight, why would I truly want to insult any woman? 😉

    @The Silly Hippie I didn’t start in the sugar world until I split up with my ex wife, and I look young for my age, but still, since my SBs were all coeds, they did look quite a bit younger than me. One in particular, when she did not get all dolled up, looked about 15. One time when we were checking out of a resort, I saw a guy who was a partner at a PE shop we were trying to do a major deal with (our shop needed his guys to come in on the deal so we were trying to be nice to them.) He was REALLY religious and conservative, in his 50s, and checking in with his wife. Ergo I did NOT want him to see me with a GF who looked 15 so I hustled her into the car the second the valet pulled up and got her out of there in about 5 seconds flat. She was kind of peeved (since usually I had no issues introducing her to my friends as my GF etc.) but once we drove away and I explained, she was OK with it.

    Re: married prominent members of the community that I know, there are only 2 ways to do it: flaunt the SBs/mistresses like you own it (usually works better in non-Western cultures where the messing around is tolerated- or in France) or go the Tiger Woods route and have members of your entourage be the point men on the subterfuge, sneaking women in to your suite and all that. My one billionaire friend in Asia who is married but a total playa usually has his right hand man approach a woman he sees that he is interested in him and give her the right hand man’s cell, and tells her to call him. And he sets it all up. (I’ve said it before, but in certain parts of the world, the super wealthy are treated like celebs and actually have groupies chasing them. It’s quite amusing to observe.)

    @LolaBabyK As I have said, I avoid all social media and work hard to keep a very very low profile online. Just be wary and trust your instincts. If your initial meet is in public, I wouldn’t let that trait alone be a deal killer. Many mega wealthy guys I know are just as private as I am, and will take a similar approach to divulging personal info. But I am aware that those with nefarious intentions might also do the same thing (out of necessity re: being found out.)

  127. The Silly Hippie says:

    The other day I was out with a well known doctor in our area. We were walking after leaving the restaurant and someone knoticed him from across the street. I was able to make a right instead of crossing the street. He was so happy! Really avoided a mess. He can’t risk being exposed.
    I honestly find it sad. Being an SD doesn’t make you a bad doctor.

  128. LolaBabyK says:

    @Hippie I haven’t yet had to, but please do share! Good to know.

  129. The Silly Hippie says:

    So I had an idea for the next blog topic. Discrete arrangements. I have gone out with married SDs or prominent members of the community. Time to time someone might recognized the SD. How do you disappear? I will not be put in shady hide a ways 24/7. I have found ways to disappear sneaky like a ninja though.
    Anyone else been there? I want to hear both sides!
    Thanks!

  130. DorkyGuy says:

    Babydoll!!!! Welcome back! Muah!

    How are things on the other side of the pond? We just need to dig up Dutchgirl and English Rose, and we’ll have the Euro-team back together.

    I always thought of you three as being the most likely SBs to also have starring roles in a Bond movie.

    One of you is the villian, the other good, and the thirds swaps sides in the middle… but each of you leaves Bond shaken, and stirred! Tell me, Babydoll, I never thought to ask… do you have the English accent that makes me melt?

  131. Treasured says:

    @ Stacy – order a male escort in 😛

    hehehehe

  132. Stacy, says:

    All alone and bored in Vegas today. Wish my SD were here to $poil me.

  133. LolaBabyK says:

    @Stacy Yes, I’m wary, too. His AD mentioned no money, though. You’re right- nothing matters until I’ve got cash in hand. Thanks for the advice, doll :)

  134. Stacy, says:

    Lola – just don’t get caught up in the idea of an offer. Nothing is real until you have cash in hand. His ad, offer, and willingness to give so much information so quickly make me a bit suspicious. But that’s just because I’ve discovered that “fake SD” seems to be a rather common pathology, and attempt at getting naked photos.

    Best of luck though! Just stay vigilant.

  135. Tina says:

    @WCSD: and the ladies thank you for that 😉

  136. LolaBabyK says:

    @Jersey I think it may be tough though, because he is clearly “anti-internet”. Refuses to do transactions over the net (possible red flag), no social media profiles, etc. I hate having to dive in without any “goggles”.

  137. LolaBabyK says:

    @Jersey I didn’t meet him here, actually. I Googled “sugar daddy” in a few close cities and came across an old AD from him. I have his 2 phone numbers, his email address, the states of where he has his 3 homes, and his first and last name. That’s what I’ve gotten so far this morning. Time to research, I guess! This is the most tedious part -_-

  138. WCSD says:

    If only the nerdy thing was attractive back in high school (at least when I went). I had the 97% average, tall but stick thin, glasses, braces, I hit all of the nerdy traits. Wasn’t until the middle of university that I became the ‘swan’ to my ugly duckling. Oh well, I guess I’d rather be more successful in the ladies department when I know what I’m doing, than being successful and just fumbling around.

  139. Jersey Darling says:

    @Lola I think it’s a good start and time will tell! I’m always cautious of high amounts. Is his profile verified?

  140. Frank says:

    Stacy, I am going to name my erection Vesuvius because its time for another eruption!

  141. LolaBabyK says:

    “Don’t we all love nerdy guys! I think there is something very alluring in smart guys, who don’t realise how sexy they are”
    Agreed! I’m a nerd as well, so dorks and I are perfect for each other :)
    On another note:
    I’ve read a bit about SBs finding 10k SDs. Well, I was quite skeptical, but alas, I’ve found one, too! As SBs (and SDs alike) we never truly know who we’re dealing with, but so far I’d say he probably IS loaded. Now, whether or not he’s actually ready to spend 10k on me is another story, but I’m hopeful 😉 His words were, “10k monthly for the right woman. I’d rather pay more for one and keep her around than juggle with 5.”
    What do you guys think? (Keep the bitchy comments at a minimum. This place is madness right now!)

  142. The other wife says:

    Best Gift:
    The connection I share with my SD is itself, a gift. I truly appreciate the relationship. We talk about our lives and what makes us happy…neither of us asks the other for anything….it comes naturally (ladies, take cue here). He was having a very stressful week at work – when he visited I told him “today is about YOU and YOU only”. He was so appreciative. About a month later, when I struggled to come up with the downpayment on my car, he left me a greeting card that read “today is about YOU and YOU only” (the card included a cheque for the full downpayment).

    Be appreciative of the gifts your SD gives – if your attitude towards his generosity becomes ho-hum, so do you Sugar!

  143. Frank says:

    woooo stacy looking good!

  144. Stacy, says:

    @Frank – I’d never forget your erection 😉

  145. Treasured says:

    @Tina – Don’t we all love nerdy guys! I think there is something very alluring in smart guys, who don’t realise how sexy they are 😀
    Throw in the glasses in the picture – and I am melting 😀

  146. Tina says:

    @Dorky: of course I haven’t written you off, nerdy is sexy 😉

  147. babydoll says:

    woah! lots of jarring going on here! hello hello everyone,time of year again!!

    dorky- nice to see you here hehe :)
    sdinLA- still charming 😉

    so whats everyone giving/ getting for valentines this year?

    where’d all the London girls been? havent been here for ages been busy busy busy!!!!

    just dropping by to peek and send kisses and cuddles and winks and also more sugar to all xxxx

  148. Treasured says:

    Ok. I JUST HAD to publish this.

    A message I just got:

    How are you Primrose
    In all honesty and all the love and respect and appreciate all the beauty you have a beautiful smile and have a look glamorous
    I wish I were the only man in the whole world to get married you
    You all the love, respect and appreciation for beauty princess my heart and Majesty
    @}; –

    Tequila, I hope it is not from you 😀 If it is, my rodeo fantasies are crushed 😀

    LOOOL

    This is a perfect example of what NOT to write in your first… or second…. or tenth message.. EVER.

  149. Treasured says:

    I was blonde in summer. Then something gotten into me and I decided to become brunette. Lasted 3 months 😀 Now I want my blonde hair back 😀

  150. Frank says:

    stacy- didn’t you mean to say “Let’s talk about my new, sweet SD, sex, drugs, the erection”

    Treasure I know your request for apology was tongue in cheek. Are you blond now? I loved your raven hair, can’t wait to see the blond!

    I have decided what I am giving my SB for valentine’s, a big bottle of massage cream so she can give me a better massage. I’m sure that she wants to make me happy. Besides, idle hands are the devils work. (or something like that)

  151. Twiceshy says:

    Wow. 0_0
    I think I will hide for a little bit longer, maybe till next topic
    heh heh :-)

  152. Treasured says:

    @Stacy – yes, let’s talk about SDs or men in general 😀

    I’m in lafff 😀 hehehehe

    And I am going back blonde 😀

  153. Stacy, says:

    @Jersey, I was referring to the entire gravatar proliferation that has taken place since the pink dress incident of ’13. You seem quite ready to fight lately.

    And, the whole fight started with a pink polyblend dress – who cares!!!

    I agree with Treasured – the angle the photo was snapped at wasn’t flattering, but (and I’ve read the entire boring thread) she said it in a way that was harsh and unnecessary – why should we care if someone’s photo makes them look like they have a fat roll? And, why must you continue to talk about it?

    This is beyond boring!!

    Let’s talk about my new, sweet SD, sex, drugs, the election – Anything else!!!

  154. Treasured says:

    Ok. Jersey.

    Sorry. For. Being. Insensitive.

    I apologise. Properly.

    😀

  155. gtt_envy says:

    I think the blog needs this quote to get it back on track 😉 sorta feels like high school!!

    Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.
    Eleanor Roosevelt

  156. Treasured says:

    Actually, I do not want anyone to apologise 😛
    That comment was made in a funny way (but, guess, my “funny” doesn’t really always come across as funny).

    I have strong views that everybody is entitled to own opinion and is free to express those. As I have said – nothing really can insult me. Well, coming from strangers. Family and close friends are different – that can hurt.
    Being called stupid and having ugly face on here, really makes me laugh 😀

  157. Treasured says:

    PS: But thank you :)

    Mwaaah
    Kiss

  158. Treasured says:

    Frank – I didn’t meant you 😛

  159. Frank says:

    Treasure- Can’t apologize since I never said any of those things. Can say I think you have both brains and beauty.

    Peace my brothers and sisters!

  160. Treasured says:

    *attack not attract

    Although, sometimes one goes with another:P

  161. Treasured says:

    @ SDinLA – you just wait till Tequila sees that 😀

    LOL!!

    Now then. Since I apologised, I’m waiting apologies to me. 1. For calling me CONSTANTLY a bitch, by various blog members. 2. For saying that I have a “miserable little life” 3. For making any comments re my physical appearance 4. For making any comments re my inner world, WITHOUT ever meeting me in person 5. For, basically calling me “stupid”.

    Hmmm… I’m sure there were a few other things 😉

    It’s easy to judge and attract others for being unfair, but how about starting noticing what you, yourself are doing?

    LOL!

  162. Treasured says:

    @Jersey – I was always good with you. ALL the way through telling you that you are hot and smart. Objecting NOT to your fashion sense, but just ONE particular item of clothing.

    So, since I have never actually stopped liking you, despite the outbursts, I am good :)

  163. SDinLA says:

    @Treasured Actually, I did not call you “a bitch.” I said “females who are being bitchy.” One can “act like a jerk” without being a jerk. Your BEHAVIOR in writing the things you wrote, in my opinion, deserved to be described as “bitchy.” In that sense it means the same as “catty” or “mean spirited.” That’s distinctly different! 😛

    In California at least, being called a bitch is not a particularly serious insult, it is used quite casually. If my intent had been to truly insult you, I would have used the C word. 😉

    In the case of Tequila, why would he use the B word with you, isn’t he being YOUR bitch? 😉

  164. Jersey Darling says:

    And we’ve both posted at the same time. There were a few insults beyond that Treasured, but I’m happy to accept your apology and move on. I’m sorry that I scarred your fashion sense for life with my pink shirt.

    Are we both good now?

  165. Jersey Darling says:

    @Treasured, I don’t think smart fits the bill considering you still haven’t seen the error of your ways. Let’s end it here: to put it politely, if I were to take advice from someone off this blog, it would not be you. I would never try to reach your level as I’d consider it a step in the wrong direction.

    I’ll be ignoring your comments on the blog from this point forward, so please feel free to forgo commenting on me. After all, you’re a busy woman, you have better things to do right?

  166. Treasured says:

    Ok. Since I still do not feel that saying “hideous” regarding an item of clothing is not offending to a person wearing it, I apoligise to Jersey’ s pink dress for calling it hideous.
    Pink dress – you are not hideous, you are lovely. Hrupft:D

    Since I have actually called Jersey hot and compared her to one of the most stunning actresses ever, I do not feel I should say sorry for that? Or, should I?

    Everybody satisfied?

    PS: as to using a B word. As I have said, sometimes it can even be fun. But, since I do not think we will ever be in that situation, you are not in a position to use it, regarding me:)

    Tequila, on the other hand, can use it as often as he wants:P

  167. SDinLA says:

    @Treasured, it’s a pussy…. on a pedestal. Not a “cat.” If you’re going to refer to me by a dismissive name based on my avatar, feel free to call me a pussy. 😛

    I DID read all of the comments before some were deleted, I was simply trying NOT to get involved after being at the vanguard of the troll thing.

    Jersey said she found your first comment to be borderline but she let it go. Your second comment, well…. everyone who read it and commented (other than Kraken-man) said they thought it was an insult. YOU may not have thought it was an insult, but the minute the person you addressed the comment to said SHE felt like it was an insult, would not the “smart”, “aware” response have been to just apologize and put an end to it, instead of spending many many posts trying to convince the target of your words that you meant no harm? Before all the “I didn’t mean it that way”, “Look I’m saying nice things about you” futility, a simple, “I’m sorry if my remark hurt your feelings” could have ended the drama then and there.

    Our perception IS our reality. Jersey (and almost ALL of us who read what you wrote) said she perceived your words to be an insult. You’re too smart not to recognize that, at that point, your stated intent did not matter and your words had indeed hurt someone.

    re: blog = artificial environment, the tenor of any online forum is set by the rules and guidelines the owners/moderators set forth. The beginning of each blog entry has the same statement. Personal attacks are supposed to be verboten here. The second your words were perceived to be a personal attack, they became a personal attack in that person’s reality. At that point, artificial environment or no, don’t you recognize that fact and apologize, instead of being unrepentant and trying to convince the party who feels hurt that he/she is over-reacting?

    re: Tequila defending you, I already gave him shite for why I thought it was misguided. I’m now asking him why he seems to be saying “Do as I say, not as I do.”

    For someone who is not hurt, you sure seem to care a lot that I used the B word 😉

  168. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

    “Generally speaking…. why do I have to choose beautiful OR smart? I choose both. And what is beauty? Outer beauty is nice, but it fades with time. Inner beauty means many things, including being considerate, thoughtful, kind and being aware of your words/actions and the feelings/sensibilities of others you interact with. Someone who is beautiful on the inside does not run roughshod over other people’s feelings in an oblivious manner.”

    when I grow up I want to be as smart ! as SDinLA (and have his Ferrari and hot Russian GF) :)
    wait … I wrote it one year ago already.

    anyway everything go circles here.

  169. Treasured says:

    *prerogatives

  170. Treasured says:

    @Tequila – since you wanted to share your email.. This is mine: temptation. white @ hotmail. co. uk

  171. Treasured says:

    @Leila – I’m loving it! Beautiful language and HOT teacher! Perfect! Certainly will make studying much more fun!

  172. Treasured says:

    @Cat- I am not hurt, as I did detect irony;)

    One question- have YOU, yourself, read my ORIGINAL comment? Before it was deleted and paraphrased? Judging by when you appeared, don’t think so.
    So, I don’t think there is a point of me continuing the conversation.

    As to my self awareness… Once again – this is a blog. Artificial environment. So, I guess, sometimes expressions don’t come across as they should.

    As to why Tequila is defending me? I have one… No, actually two prerigatives-boobs:P

    And, as, apparently he also has a bitch fetish-there are two of us:D

  173. SDinLA says:

    Gee, for people who want to let stuff go, it sure gets rehashed a lot. 😉

    @Tequila my second comment was to you, sure. But I was making two points, the first point was directly addressing Treasured’s insulting comment(s.) And again, why when I reply am I being an attention whore who needs the last word… yet when Treasured replies long after things have calmed down, you praise her for being dignified? How is that not a double standard, my agave drinking friend?

    @Treasured I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings, but my point was only that regardless of how YOU perceived what you said, it was hurtful to others. Self-awareness is a beautiful thing.

    Generally speaking…. why do I have to choose beautiful OR smart? I choose both. And what is beauty? Outer beauty is nice, but it fades with time. Inner beauty means many things, including being considerate, thoughtful, kind and being aware of your words/actions and the feelings/sensibilities of others you interact with. Someone who is beautiful on the inside does not run roughshod over other people’s feelings in an oblivious manner.

    Regarding what you posted… 99% of the people who read your comments found them to be mean and hurtful to the person you were addressing. You say you did not mean them that way, you’re that way with your friends in real life. If that is the case, that displays a distinct lack of awareness of how your words can affect other people. And that’s not an admirable trait, regardless of how smart one is, how many languages he or she might speak etc.

    If you go to another country, and the people there have customs that differ from yours, do you ignore them, offend them and then say, “Well, that’s just the way I am!” I doubt it. Anybody who is as smart as you claim to be will make an effort to learn the local customs and to act accordingly so as not to offend their hosts as a visitor to that country. In what society is it acceptable to speak one’s mind regardless of how it might affect those who hear/read your words and then claim that one “meant no harm” because “that’s how I always am?”

    THAT was the main point of what I wrote. I was perhaps harsher than I could have been in how I parodied your words to make the point, and as above, I am sorry for that…. but I am NOT sorry for making the point: you can’t say something mean and then claim ignorance/lack of malice as your defense (especially if you also keep telling us how smart you are) when everybody else regards it as mean and hurtful.

  174. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Treasured
    I think the Cat was attempting more to make fun of me in his comment, in an attempt to prove a point to me or about me. I even thought he said something to that effect. Even so, your first comment could have stood alone as it was the dignified way to go. You are both smart and gorgeous. Don’t be drawn towards the playground.

  175. Leila says:

    @treasured,(Smart or pretty? If you had to choose one? if ur fortunate to have both then exhibit/flaunt it;)

  176. Leila says:

    @treasured,well said…lascia il movimento su,
    Lol! How is it going with your Italian?

  177. Treasured says:

    And, basically, as for my face or general appearance.

    I’d rather be smart than pretty 😉

    In a few years I will be a doctor, who knows 7 languages and has also a degree in business, with a mortgage paid off in full.

    Now, let me think, pretty or smart???
    Since I managed to live without being “pretty” before, I choose “smart” over and over again 😀

    Hmmmm….

    What do other people think?
    Smart or pretty? If you had to choose one?

  178. Treasured says:

    AND.

    Since we are talking.

    Sorry, but I AM THE only person who can call me a “bitch”. And maybe someone else in a “significant” moments 😉

    I would never ever dare to name call other people, out of respect. Giving a critique to clothes is perfectly acceptable for me. I am sorry my comments were removed, and it can’t be proved now.

    I can critique the style (sorry, but style school pays off) or the pictures (I am an amateur photographer), but I never had gone that far, as calling someone’s life “sad and miserable”.

    And… Noticing, Jersey you did change your avatar? Why would you do that, if YOU like the previous so much?
    (I, of course, do like this one better. Since you do look sexy and alluring).

    All this reminded me a fight at the playground.

    PS: I would have left this all alone, if not for a gentleman, who has only his cat to show off as his persona.

  179. Treasured says:

    Oh la la la 😛 Boys were fighting 😀
    If not for me, then because of me 😀

    Re my tattoo. Once and for always. I LOVE it. I think it is a work of art and it is one on a million.
    The difference between me an some other person is, that no matter how much you’d slam it, if I LIKE it and think that it is wonderful, nothing will change my mind. Or, make me throw a major temper tantrum, stir the whole blog and… Will not continue.

    Self confidence will get you a long way 😉

  180. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

    Jersey.

    OMG.
    Treasured was right! :) !

    you do look like Monica Bellucci ! ! !

    If someone would have compared me to Sophie Loren and Monica … then I would not care if they critiqued my dress/blouse .
    Sophia and Monica look the best in D &G .

    I used to have a very close Lithuanian GF in NYC (she even met Brandon with me at the party) :) she helped me with shopping /style all the time. I am very appreciative then people help with to pick clothes. RussianSB gave me a lot of advises. it is true, I did ask her for that first.

    It is funny – the pot (with who we went for steak 2 weeks ago) told me during our dinner “to attract a guy you have to wear something sexy”. !?!

    I usually wear something classy , a bit conservative dresses for the first meeting. ?!?
    I had a little black very fitted Valentino dress on me ?! Black Stuart Weismann heals and short mink coat with 2/3 sleeve (I knew we were going to one of the best steak houses at B mall. )
    ( I am not drop dead gorgeous, and not so young to look good in H&M , sorry. I think it is super great if some girls can look great in 30$ blouse , unfortunately I can not).
    He told me he will take me to Nordstrom to pick a sexy dress. :)

    you girls have to help me with sexy dress for first meet up. not too slutty , not looking cheap but still sexy.
    Please post photos, link here .

  181. DorkyGuy says:

    LOL! @ pots… You probably played long enough ago and at a high enough level that you know what a “pot rotation” is. I guess “pot rotation” has a whole different meaning here, eh?

    I never quite got the hang of rogue, because I was never that nimble on my feet. Did you happen to see the video of the twinked out level 1 rogue that beat the lvl 40 player in Goldshire? Enchants ftw!

    I am pretty sure that every female in the blog, except maybe Tina, has now crossed me off their pot list 😛

  182. Jersey Darling says:

    I loved my Murky! He was my lil buddy on raids that would sometimes bring us a whole trail of enemies haha. This is going to sound really lame but I actually teared up when I got him as a gift. So when this topic came up and I wanted to respond, I didn’t figure anyone would get it. Go figure I got to share my story after all!

    I know what you mean about working your ass off, I was in a top raiding guild! And in WoW, “pot” had a different meaning. I used to drink pots all the time 😉

  183. DorkyGuy says:

    I remember Murky!! I was not lucky enough to have one… I was always jealous of those who did. He was pretty rare. I only saw him a handful of times.

    Like you, I couldn’t bring myself to sell my account. I have gear and titles that you can’t get any more. And I worked my ass off for them!

  184. Jersey Darling says:

    Dorky, oh my god!! I used to love WoW! I raided as a rogue!

    In fact, my best Valentine’s gift ever was a baby Murloc pet (Murky) that my then boyfriend bought me. You could only get Murky from attending Blizzcon a few years earlier.

    When I stopped playing I couldn’t bring myself to sell my account (even with all the top raid gear) because I couldn’t give up Murky :(

    I used to love going to noob enemy areas and steal thing around so all the people could see was Murky. Lol

    Your post brought back such memories!

  185. Tina says:

    @DorkyGuy: hell yeah, my Necro needs some healing! 😉

  186. DorkyGuy says:

    “I find the catty comments from the peanut gallery a little amusing. Everybody has different techniques for attracting the other gender. Why not just let everyone use what works best for them? Does anyone here have any obligation to pass some sort of fairness test dictated by the rest?”

    This applies to the guys too. Since I can’t measure up to Tequila’s Kracken, Jack’s Jacuzzi, SDinLA’s wealth, Guru’s expertise, Stormcat’s heart, WCSD’s sense of humor, or fly’rs sophistication, I have to rely on the one advantage that God gave me.

    Any ladies want to bang a guy who has a level 80 priest on World of Warcraft?

  187. Tina says:

    @flyr: that was a thought, although the brownie is already SO sweet that whipped cream isn’t necessary and may send all involved into a sugar coma…..I’ve though of adding brandy, buuuuuuuut, I don’t drink brandy which means I would have a large bottle of it just sitting around. I hate having good alcohol sit and not be enjoyed……

  188. flyr says:

    Try serving the brownie with a little whipped cream mixed with finely grated orange on top and then a dash of great brandy..

  189. Jersey Darling says:

    Lo’s got an avatar!

    You have to admit, it makes the blog a prettier place :)

  190. Tina says:

    @DorkyGuy: awwww, that’s sweet! I chose this item because it was easy to transport, brownies are one of his favorite sweets, and it was scratch made. No box for this lady! Nuh-uh! I think the next time I make it I might add either a little nutmeg or chili powder to it, just to shake things up….orange peel would go well too, but I’m not a fan of orange flavored sweets………Oh, and it was a step for me because I abhor Valentine’s Day, but he likes to celebrate it, soooooo…..I made the effort for him :)

  191. Tina says:

    And if someone want to appear as a little yellow blob in overalls and, at times, an apron – LONG LIVE THE CHOICE!

    Now, let’s get back to the minion booty shakin’ happiness, hmm?

  192. DorkyGuy says:

    @Tina~ One of my best received Valentine’s gifts was when I made two heart-shaped strawberry cheesecakes. She was stunned, because the kitchen and I don’t get along, and I didn’t use a mix. Me cooking is in the same category as Jessica Alba doing nuclear physics. It’s only possible in the movies.

    @Jersey… I vote keep the avatar. I like it, and I’m sure the other guys do to.

    I find the catty comments from the peanut gallery a little amusing. Everybody has different techniques for attracting the other gender. Why not just let everyone use what works best for them? Does anyone here have any obligation to pass some sort of fairness test dictated by the rest?

    If someone wants to put their form on display, and appeal that way, then great. If someone wants to portray themselves as sophisticated, and appeal to another kind of man, then great. I don’t get the drama.

  193. Leila says:

    @Tina,now I’m hungry for some salmon with teriyaki glaze( my fav food btw) yummmmmy!

  194. The Silly Hippie says:

    @ Tina

    Need a baking buddy / minion? Lol

    I love cooking and baking. I’m now learning to make homemade cheeses Greek style! Mmm

  195. The Silly Hippie says:

    Lol thanks jersey and Stacy, beat me to it!

  196. Tina says:

    Wellllllll, I made some brownies from scratch earlier in the week (the person that they were for has already received them and enjoyed them!). I’m going to make a NY cheesecake for a friend for Valentines (by request) as well as a simple yellow cake with chocolate icing in a heart shaped pan just because I can :) (I put the brownies in a heart shaped pan, and when I bought it in a 2 pack, it came with a free box of cake mix and icing of my choosing….)

    As for non-baked goods, I haven’t made any dinners lately, although I’ll be making some pan seared salmon with a teriyaki glaze in the next few days…..

  197. The Silly Hippie says:

    How do you put a picture / avatar or what not on here? I feel so out of the loop!

  198. Jersey Darling says:

    @Stacy, go to gravatar dot com. Create an account using the email you use to post on here and voila.

  199. Jersey Darling says:

    @Dorky

    It’s urban legend that dork is the term for whale penis. So I think you’ve got your name already if you want it :)

    @Stacy
    If I’d be so presumptuous as to assume that your “I’m sexier than you” avatar contest comment is geared toward me… I’m not competing with anyone, I chose mine by request. And should anyone be offended by an avatar of mine, you are free to email me directly and I’ll take your feedback into account.

    But thanks for calling my avatar sexy 😉

  200. Stacy, says:

    Okay Tina- your minions and Russian’s Snowball get a pass, since they aren’t showing off their money makers. 😉

    How do I get an avatar for this site?

  201. Leila says:

    @Tina, what have been cooking lately?

  202. Leila says:

    @tequila, you had your 80 cents,And i had my 2cents,and moved on long time ago:) still staring at the the avatar (gulp

  203. Tina says:

    awwww, but Stacy. my minions mean no harm! 😉

  204. Stacy, says:

    Ladies – let’s delete all the “I’m sexier than you” gravatars and sheath the claws, the blog was fun before we all started critiquing and competing. There’s enough of the Kraken and Jack’s jacuzzi to go around.

  205. DorkyGuy says:

    [quote]@Dorky
    “why tequila”
    There was a man popular in the 90′s named Pee Wee Herman. He had a song where ppl would scream out “Tequila!”
    When I was little I called my penis “Pee Wee.” After puberty, I called it The Kraken. Was that TMI or did u really wanna know?

    P.S. – Tequila cuz I was always drunk on tequila. And I’m not too good to drink with anyone, even you. [/quote] ~TequilaSD

    Not sure how I missed that post first time around… maybe it was moderated?

    Anyway, I had no idea that the name had such a well endowed backstory! I never got around to naming Little Dorky… although now that I think of it, that might just work. Mini-me is also a possibility.

  206. Tina says:

    I feel much more secure now flyr. Thank you 😀

  207. flyr says:

    there out from the shadows

  208. Jersey Darling says:

    “@fly: your R has run away………

    @Tina, I think it flew away!

  209. fly says:

    It;s a case of a dangling R

  210. RussianSB says:

    Army of mini-Tinas !

  211. Janine says:

    I am seeking a Sugar relationship-its all new to me but I hope things all go well for me. There have been some interesting posts

  212. Tina says:

    @all: please let it drop

  213. RussianSB says:

    @Jersey Darling, again , you are wrong – having one month of nice posts, and, then all the BS in one day… It is the same person ! With multiply personality.
    Sure, we have some SB here, who study profesionally such cases and can ”describe” the person. Maybe it is just a lost little girl who need mommy and extra attention ??

  214. LolaBabyK says:

    The worst part isn’t that she won’t shut up, but that she makes it so obvious. It really IS easy to get pissed off around here…

  215. Tina says:

    @fly: your R has run away………

  216. fly says:

    It’s nice to see some semblance of tranquility in blogland as the sun sets over the yardarm……………………..

    If you are trying to intellectualize the discussion try this test

    Show a guy a picture of a woman with amazing breasts in most any outfit from birthday suit to full nun uniform for 3 seconds. Take the picture away and ask him to describe the shoes, the purse etc.

  217. LolaBabyK says:

    Is Leila also Madi/Cali?

  218. Tina says:

    I can’t take credit for the avatar – someone who is OBVIOUSLY a fan of mine sent it to me to use 😉

  219. Jersey Darling says:

    Ahh Tina your heart shaped avatar is so cute!

  220. RussianSB says:

    Oh, Tina, I love ME-ME-ME trips !

  221. Jersey Darling says:

    @Russian, I smell bullshit :)

    But the trolls and their aliases can buzz all they want. Personal attacks are banned and I’ll be ignoring them.

  222. Jersey Darling says:

    Yep, it works. I just linked to SA’s website but you can put your profile link in there and then when people click it it will take them to your profile.

    Good option to use if you want it. I happen to like my privacy.

  223. RussianSB says:

    @Jersey Darling… in that cases we compare troll appearence with bad smell arround …So, you are wrong, it is not sound, can you smell it ?

  224. @Russian, I think if you put the link to your profile in the website field, clicking on your name once you post should then take you to your profile.

    I tried posting something in mine for this comment.

  225. RussianSB says:

    Comments about looks, personal attacs ? It is taboo …
    Who is ideal ? Where, did you say, people, we are linked to our profiles ??

  226. Jersey Darling says:

    Did I hear a buzzing sound?

    Nope? Oh, right, that’s the sound of being ignored. 8)

  227. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Leila
    Welcome back.

    We have all moved on. Please stare in awe at my avatar pic. 😀

  228. Tina says:

    @Jersey: sorry darlin’, Jersey isn’t in the plans, and this trip is ALLLLL about ME! Lil ol ME! ME ME ME ME ME ME ME! 😀

  229. RussianSB says:

    We are fighting with fake daddys and maniacs, I didn’t think we will be attacked by our own sex ! It is just disgusting ladies … If you having hard times in life, or some recent dissapointments in your love lifes, don’t pour out your poison here.
    I know we are all anonymus here, but most writers here over 40, mature, financial secure, satisfied with life people. And your problems will stay with you. Maybe it is time to grow up ??

  230. Jersey Darling says:

    @Tiiiiiina that’s so exciting! Can you make coming to Jersey part of your trip? 😀

  231. LolaBabyK says:

    @Leila Nope. I’m just Lola. You can find my SA profile linked above somewhere, I think.

  232. Jersey Darling says:

    Hehe! @Russian, if you post a pic of your boobies for your avatar too that’ll be it, game over!

  233. Tina says:

    @RussianSB: yes I’m SUPER excited, I haven’t started packing yet (I don’t leave until the 27th) and I ALWAYS need sun block since I’m lily white and Irish heritage (burn, peel ,freckle)…….

  234. Tina says:

    New minion, easier to see the shape coming soon to a blog near you…..thanks to a friend 😉

  235. RussianSB says:

    @Tina, are you exited ? Are you packing a little bit ??
    Do you need sunblock lotion ??

  236. RussianSB says:

    Jersey Darling … it is all boobie-envy group of fans, don’t even bother !

  237. Tina says:

    @RussianSB: I’m going to a city in the US that I haven’t been to before. That’s all I’m at liberty to say :) (And yes, don’t be fooled, I can be QUITE rude when need be!)

  238. RussianSB says:

    Everything in it’s own place !

  239. RussianSB says:

    That’s my life out of blog … now it is same in the blog !

  240. RussianSB says:

    You cannot be rude,Tina…
    Now, I am home – surrounded by classy ladies and bottle of Tequila !

  241. RussianSB says:

    @Tina
    Where ? Where ? I am such a travel junky !

  242. Tina says:

    @RussianSB: just haaaaaaad to ask me a question so that it would be rude of me to just leave the blog without answering it, didn’t ya?

    Yes, that is my Valentine avatar. He’s wearing pink overalls with a lighter pink heart on them. And he’s saying “WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?” (my reaction to the awesomeness that is coming during my combo birthday/Valentine’s trip later this month)

  243. Jersey Darling says:

    Umm, I think I’d like a bottle of the Tequilla.

    No really. Just the bottle.

  244. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Tina and @All My Fans

    It just spoke to me.
    Being nicknamed Tequila is very good.
    Having a phallic-symbol gravatar filled with high-grade tequila to complement my nickname…PRICELESS.

  245. RussianSB says:

    Tina… don’t tell me that is your ”Valentines” avatar !

  246. LolaBabyK 1323680 says:

    An avatar of the Kraken, maybe. Hmm…the Kraken with a 28″ cock. Yes. That will do nicely.

  247. Jersey Darling says:

    Double LOL at Tina’s avatar!!

  248. Jersey Darling says:

    *chokes on drink*

    *stares at Tequila’s avatar* 😯

  249. Tina says:

    @Tequila: I know I said I was leaving the blog, but I can’t resist in agreeing that the avatar of a caramel colored dick suits you……….. 😉

  250. JustATequilaSD says:

    @RussianSB
    Maybe that is all just part of my plan. *wink*

    @SDinLA
    Thank you for mentioning asombroso, I’ve been meaning to upload a bottle as my avatar. It’s just speaks to me.

  251. RussianSB says:

    Frank ! Good news !
    Tequila said everybody will run away from me !!!

  252. RussianSB says:

    Tequila… NO ! I go to Canada :))))))))))))
    I am watching Madagascar now (for first time) – it is a masterpiece !
    What a funny accents.

  253. RussianSB says:

    Jersey Darling – you can just press them(SD) against the wall with boobies !

  254. Lo says:

    thank you x

  255. Frank says:

    Were going to the Black Sea for our honeymoon? Hooray!!

    LO-if you are not seeing someone else, the answer is no. Unless he has offered you a guaranteed contract for certain number of months, you owe it to yourself to keep a look out for other potential SD’s. If someone comes along that makes you want to double dip, then would be the time to revisit the situation with your first sd.

    Russia, I counted Jersey’s attack, and I came up to a triple threat!

  256. Jersey Darling says:

    If I had a political career I’m pretty sure my involvement on SA would do me in!

    IMO, always make an SD feel like he is the only one. Be honest, but it’s fair to leave certain things unsaid unless he directly asks. It can vary based on the guy though…

  257. JustATequilaSD says:

    @RussianSB
    You are using all 3 weeks on black seas?

  258. JustATequilaSD says:

    ***as you see in response to***

  259. RussianSB says:

    Poor boys, Jersey Darling, boys have double attack, brain and the boobies.
    If only you can go to political career !

  260. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Jersey and @Lo
    we are better with direct and visual responses as you in response to Lo’s question. there are many times i will actually defer to sb’s when it comes tactical manuevers on getting an sd. I have never snagged an sd (not trying ofc), and will not have a true point of reference.

  261. JustATequilaSD says:

    @flyr
    Just had to pee (wee) on my parade didn’t you :(

  262. RussianSB says:

    Boobies………..
    Will save the World !

  263. Jersey Darling says:

    @Lo, gotcha :) I meant that some of the SDs actually give the best advice cause it tells you what your guy will probably want to hear. Then its just up to you how you deliver that message.

  264. fly says:

    Living in a post Google world is hell

  265. fly says:

    @ JATSD @Dorky
    “why tequila”
    There was a man popular in the 90′s named Pee Wee Herman. He had a song where ppl would scream out “Tequila!”
    When I was little I called my penis “Pee Wee.” After puberty, I called it The Kraken. Was that TMI or did u really wanna know?

    I hate to pour cellar temperature Pinot on the fire but PeeWee’s career came to a halt after his arrest – my recollection from the papers it was in a gay movie theater with PeeWee dressed in his best rain coat.

    from wikipee In July 1991, after deciding to take a few years’ sabbatical from Pee-wee, Reubens was arrested for indecent exposure in an adult theater in Sarasota, Florida. The arrest set off a chain reaction of national media attention that changed the general public’s view of Reubens and Pee-wee.[1] The arrest postponed Reubens’ engagement in big projects until 1999

  266. Lo says:

    Jersey my post about directing my comment at experienced chicas on this blog was posted before I got to see your answer, wanted to mention that because it looks weird posted after your comment.

  267. Jersey Darling says:

    All the answers are good I think. Honesty is the best, but why position a potential negative (juggling multiples) based on a hypothetical that may never even happen? That’s the way I look at it.

  268. Lo says:

    okay sounds good, will play it by ear and maybe he won’t bring the question up again. Also SD’s quit checking out other ladies when they walk by! lol or at least be more discreet about it dang!

  269. Lo says:

    lol maybe I should’ve directed my question at the experienced chicas on this blog

  270. Jersey Darling says:

    @Lo

    While I’m a big fan of honesty, I believe that many girls try to juggle more than one to meet their financial goals. So let’s look at actually answering the question he asked:

    “my pot SD asked me today if I have more than one SD or if I was planning on juggling a couple”

    Do you have one now? If not, just say no and move on. How can you know if you plan to juggle if you don’t even have two on the table yet? 😉

    Quick and clean.

    Or, you can be completely honest about what you plan to do. Whatever suits your style best.

  271. The Silly Hippie says:

    I’m the princess and I don’t want to share the attention, toys, or my Sugar! :-p

  272. The Silly Hippie says:

    I think no matter how long they suspend the comments, delete, or try to change the topic women naturally need some type of competition to feel good.
    Example: I took my niece to a birthday party this weekend. She is six, birthday girl was four. It was a princess themed party. They were the only girls within the similar age range. Home party, bunch of fun Bosnian friends, mostly family, so you catching the idea?
    Both girls loved each other, but were constantly fighting or teasing each other.

    It doesn’t make it any different now.

    There is only room for one princess! Lol

  273. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Lo

    The truth is usually easiest to remember.

  274. DorkyGuy says:

    Honesty? Just a thought

  275. Lo says:

    you guys my pot SD asked me today if I have more than one SD or if I was planning on juggling a couple and I kind of didn’t know how to respond but sort of mumbled my way out of giving a straight answer. Thoughts on this?

  276. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Frank
    I will buy her 2.5 dozen roses with the money she sends…I have a coupon.

  277. Jersey Darling says:

    Frank – thank you :) Good to be back. Thing the comment shutdown was good.. look how talkative we all are now haha

  278. Jersey Darling says:

    Lo, wow thank you! Gravatar moved quicker than usual, didn’t think this would show up so quickly.

  279. Jersey Darling says:

    Russia, once it updates, this one’s for you! I’ll change it soon though :) Will probably go back to the mask for a while.

  280. Frank says:

    PS-Welcome back Jersey Darling

  281. Frank says:

    Ruskie-where have you been. I have tried to contact you, I am getting divorced. She is taking everything, but its ok, as long as I have you. We can get married as soon as legal stuff is finalized. Can you loan me some money, I want to send you 2 dozen roses, you are so beautiful, and I have a dozen thoughtful presents I want to buy for you.

  282. Frank says:

    Hey everybody, don’t move on with out me!!!!!!!

  283. Lo says:

    dang Jersey you are stunning, not even trying to blow smoke.

  284. Jersey Darling says:

    I was just joking :) Don’t worry, no boobies have made their way to the blog though I’m still sifting through pics

  285. DorkyGuy says:

    “Jersey’s boobs make me think of Legally Blonde”

  286. LolaBabyK 1323680 says:

    Pressure? More like shit breaking in there. Eeek >.<

  287. JustATequilaSD says:

    OOPs! I meant:

    ***She shoots and she scores!***

  288. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Jersey
    Moving on, right?

  289. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Lola
    ” All 28″
    don’t be afraid, you may feel a strong pressure at first

  290. Jersey Darling says:

    @Russian, I was going to settle for my face (that’s easy enough to keep naked!) but boobies… oh no LOL I don’t know if the blog can handle that! Treasured might comment that my nipples are too pink!

  291. LolaBabyK says:

    @Jersey Put up whichever picture suits you- Screw those who have a problem with it. They don’t define you and neither does the picture.

  292. LolaBabyK says:

    @Tequila All 28″, right lol?

  293. RussianSB says:

    @Jersey_Darling, I will be more specific – let it be boobie picture !

  294. RussianSB says:

    I am dropping bombs, to re-direct blog from it’s usual rootes !

  295. JustATequilaSD says:

    Now where’s food lady number one to say something sexy when you need her?

  296. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    On that note…..I will say goodnight,time for bed. Enjoy yourselves and I will catch up soon

    xx

  297. JustATequilaSD says:

    @LadyV and @Lola
    “There can be only one”

  298. JustATequilaSD says:

    @RussianSB
    The M word and the L word

    Female Translation:
    He really cares about me.

    Male Translation:
    RUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN !!!!!

  299. LolaBabyK says:

    I’ve not been here long, but even I would miss the Kraken….

  300. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    We cant have any martyers deaths,JATSD. What would we do without the stories about the Kraken if that happen? :-)

  301. LolaBabyK says:

    @Tequila That’s the spirit!

  302. JustATequilaSD says:

    @LolaBabyK

    My point is not to take is seriously. I hope that neither you nor WCSD took my statement as an affront to any of your person.

  303. RussianSB says:

    So, M-bomb worked, while L-bomb nobody cares nowadays !

  304. Jersey Darling says:

    Haha well I’m still looking for a picture without clothes that doesn’t show everything! It’s not an easy task!

  305. RussianSB says:

    @SDinLA
    If… if… if…
    Who cares, why should I think about ” if I will crash in a bus at pedestrain ? ”.
    like every blond, I follow my instincts, not my reasons !
    In Moscow I also prefer sugar boys to regular boys …

  306. LolaBabyK says:

    @Tequila Helping with what? I really was just teasing, I’m sorry, lol.
    @DG I’d laugh, but Tequila would just accuse me of “not helping”

    Okay, okay- I’ll stop :)

  307. JustATequilaSD says:

    Besides…martyrs die. I’m not dying for any of you fuckers. but i will take your jeers.

  308. JustATequilaSD says:

    @LolaBabyK
    Are you helping with this statement?

    ***BAZINGA !! You got me.***

  309. DorkyGuy says:

    Hey wait…. California SB left the blog… at the same time Dorky Guy returned to the blog… hmmmmm….. That sounds suspicious to me.

  310. LolaBabyK says:

    @RussianSB “If I meet a guy with armfull of flowers, thoughtful presents and sweet compliments – I will see red flag – that is just not normal.”
    Are sweet compliments and flowers not welcomed over there in Russia? Don’t get me wrong, it’s kind of….cheesy, but it’s sure better than a wad of cash, as far as being “thoughtful” is concerned.

  311. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Dorky
    “why tequila”
    There was a man popular in the 90’s named Pee Wee Herman. He had a song where ppl would scream out “Tequila!”
    When I was little I called my penis “Pee Wee.” After puberty, I called it The Kraken. Was that TMI or did u really wanna know?

    P.S. – Tequila cuz I was always drunk on tequila. And I’m not too good to drink with anyone, even you. 😀

  312. LolaBabyK says:

    @Tequila “villagers get your torches! I’m at the dunking booth, ready Daddy issues? Pour it out on me. Mommy issues? I’m ready. If you all have to pick on me at once in the interest of blog progression, I won’t fight back.”
    Martyrdom is just a front for playing the victim 😉

  313. WCSD says:

    @Dorky – And aren’t we all just locked to the blog just to see the Jersey gravatar with no clothing! I know I am….

  314. JustATequilaSD says:

    @WCSD
    Until I get to 100 move ons, I’m still running second place. Besides, with the peanut gallery to continue to stir it up even after the lockdown, maybe it’ll take another day.

    OOOPs, I’m not supposed to be fighting back. Sorry.

    OOF! You poked me in my sensibilities. I deserved it.
    ***Tequila got served!!***

    Anyone else?

  315. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    I would be willing to take the risk for an evening if he came armed with all those things :-)

  316. Sweetie says:

    I think the best gift i ever received for Valentines day was bunch of white tulips and vinyl (with nice jazz music on it).

  317. DorkyGuy says:

    [quote]Okay, I really don’t feel like me without a gravatar. I’m trying to think of one without clothes to avoid any potential issues. ~ Jersey Darling[/quote]

    That has my vote!

  318. WCSD says:

    @Jersey – If we can’t laugh at someone else’s expense then we aren’t doing it right….errr…I mean…ummm…crap.

  319. Jersey Darling says:

    Okay, I really don’t feel like me without a gravatar. I’m trying to think of one without clothes to avoid any potential issues.

  320. RussianSB says:

    If I meet a guy with armfull of flowers, thoughtful presents and sweet compliments – I will see red flag – that is just not normal.
    It is very dangerous – ”professional seduser type”

  321. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    How exciting Jersey. Let us know how it goes. :-)

  322. Jersey Darling says:

    @WCSD – I *really* want to laugh at your comment but I’m trying not to get sucked back into this!

  323. DorkyGuy says:

    @Tequila… you asked for it. I take umbrage at your name. Why just Tequila?

    What do you have against other beverages? Is it racist? Do you favor Hispanics over other cultures? How is RussianSB supposed to feel, if you don’t even acknowledge her vodka, with such blatant favoritism?

    I drink red wine from a box using a silly straw… should I feel like you look down on my drink choice?

    It’s ok RussianSB, I am here for you in your time of need.

  324. WCSD says:

    @Tequila – you are right, you are the bigger man. You have moved on. Now can you move on from moving on? Or are there another 80 posts about how you’ve moved on?

  325. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Here is a kiss to both JATSD and SDinLA, I adore you both.

    Now a question for all you SD’s how would you surprise your SB if you believe in Valentines’? And for those that dont, please just think of it as another day. xx

  326. Jersey Darling says:

    Lady V, I have a gent flying over from England that I’m supposed to be seeing tomorrow. I don’t usually do the long distance thing and haven’t heard from him since yesterday with the details so I’m not sure what’s going on quite yet.

  327. RussianSB says:

    I am so used to sugar… that I prefer cash (like every grown-up lady), then go to the shop, then pick present of my choice, then thank my SD for present of my choice he gives me. I do all that steps automatically. The truth is that 99% of boys cannot make thoughtful presents, don’t give them hard times, girls, they absolutely not good in shopping girl’s things.
    I actually get thoughtful present today … but it was from very thoughtful man…
    all his life he use his head mercyless. To make me happy is a matter of good technics for him.

  328. Jersey Darling says:

    Thank you Lady Vuitton, Dorky :)

    Did this really happen last year? Ha!

    I forgot Valentine’s day was even coming up till I noticed everything in stores turned shades of pink and red. I actually had Valentine’s day off work and agreed to work before I remembered what day it was.

  329. JustATequilaSD says:

    I need no one to confirm or deny anything. My opinion is just that…an opinion. No matter how crazy or far-fetched it seems. It won’t matter to me if you criticize me, gang up on me, exalt me, or praise me.

    I had moved on, and it was not me that felt the need to rekindle the sub-topic. Perhaps we can learn from my attempt.So can we all move on then? Or does anyone else really just feel they have to get their point across? Hurry up and get it out, so we can go on with our lives. can i be shrek today? villagers get your torches! I’m at the dunking booth, ready Daddy issues? Pour it out on me. Mommy issues? I’m ready. If you all have to pick on me at once in the interest of blog progression, I won’t fight back. GET IT ALL OUT, let the healing begin. :)

  330. SDinLA says:

    @Tequila Attention Whoring is a terrible thing. What can I say? Sometimes you control it, and sometimes it controls you. I’m only human… 😉

    @RussianSB I am curious as to why you think the men on this site might make good husbands…

    If they are married, they are unavailable to you in that capacity.

    If they dump the wife for you, how will you ever know he won’t do the same thing to you some day?

    If he’s single and not looking to get serious (the only reason I had SBs was that I knew I was not ready to have a serious relationship after my divorce) do you really think you can find the right guy to settle down with?

    I’m not saying it is impossible to find true love and a spouse on SA…. intuitively it just does not seem like the best place to be looking. Or is that more a function of the options you have in Moscow being bad and therefore SA at least provides some hope of finding the right man?

  331. LolaBabyK says:

    @Lady Thanks :) I’ve been in the sugar bowl for about 2 years now off & on. It’s been challenging at times, but I think I’m ready to jump back into it! It’s been a couple of weeks, and I forgot just how tedious this all is…
    Glad you’re back @Jersey :) I was rooting for you!

  332. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    All calm now which is great to see.

    Now has anyone any hot dates coming up….. spill the beans…..

  333. DorkyGuy says:

    Welcome back Jersey! (pronounced Joyzee?)

    I think it was just the annual Valentine’s Week Blog Meltdown. Same thing happened last year. Sorry you got caught in the middle. It’s like the full moon or something.

  334. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Hi Jersey

    Good to see you

  335. JustATequilaSD says:

    @SDinLA
    ” just poking fun at the absurdity”
    It’s just all one big fucking joke. What would it have taken for anyone to respond the way I did just now? Too many ppl have to try to PROVE stuff on the blog. I’m not pointing fingers at anyone involved w/last few days. I’m just stating a point. Maybe we should all try to “move on” at the beginning of our comment, rather than after “i made my point.” Most of us do this.

    re: the lockdown
    I’m sure everyone had something spicy to say before the lockdown. That’s why he locked it down. So that maybe we ALL could move on when it opened up. My comment showed that I tried to do that. Your comments will only continue the circus as people chime in to comment on your comments. I mean, “touche”? Was that really even necessary? LMAO

    It’s just all one big fucking joke.

  336. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Nothing planned as yet Russian SB but hopefully. I have a couple weeks of in March and will go to the States then but would love to go somewhere warm with cocktails. :-)

  337. Jersey Darling says:

    I had a couple people reach out to me after I left and I was genuinely surprised. Thank you to those who did, it made me realize there was something to come back for. Lo, I did get to see your posts, thank you for confirming that I was not crazy and it was indeed blatantly obvious!

    Lola, welcome to the madness! :)

  338. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    I know the feeling Lola. Same as the bag of post I always receive that day :-) (joke)

    I am sure you will be very successful x

  339. RussianSB says:

    At home, and personally, I can offer to ”Big boys” traditional dishes, and super-cool beer-snacks, I also will vanish before game. I am something, I know !

  340. RussianSB says:

    @Tequila… I am not cooking ”personally” for 2000 people, youk now.
    For ”Big boys” New York steake, I guess, medium rare !

  341. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Welcome Lolababe

    Enjoy x

  342. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Sounds wonderful RussianSB

    I hope you have a really great time. Bring back lots of gossip :-)

  343. RussianSB says:

    Lady V., are youplanning to go to Kontinent this summer ?

  344. LolaBabyK says:

    @Vuitton Me, too! There may be plenty of fish in the sea, but it’s just too much work sorting through them all!

  345. RussianSB says:

    I will work till 24 February, no day-off, masochistic, I know, then I go to holydays (3 weeks), then work 3 weeks more, then go to official vacation (I already asked 6 weeks, but we still negotiate …), I will spend it on Black Sea…
    No plans for weekend … :(

  346. SDinLA says:

    @Tequila I don’t take anything said on a blog too seriously. But come on, you made 30 posts about how Treasured’s comment was not mean spirited and she must have been trying to be helpful. My reply was just poking fun at the absurdity of that position/response when clearly it was a catty jibe.

    Women make catty jibes. So be it. Why try so hard to deny that 1+1 =2 when it was just that?

    (I’d have posted it before Guru went to Defcon 1 and locked the blog down, but I didn’t get to, and you know us Attention Whores, I gotta get my 2 cents in, especially when the other guy’s posted 80 cents worth of replies already! 😉

  347. Lo says:

    SdinLA touche!

  348. LolaBabyK says:

    You guys are hilarious! (^_^) I’ve been following the blog for a couple of weeks now and I want in! Have the waters calmed down or should I go pop myself a bag of popcorn, lol?
    My best gift so far has just been cash, but I’d really much rather have had jewelry or something he knew I’d been wanting. Something thoughtful shows so much more effort, regardless of the price. Cash is always good, but it only takes a nano-second worth of effort on his part to reach into his wallet.

    I’m no troll & I promise that this is my only handle 😉
    -Lola xoxo

  349. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    I am still trying to find a date for Valentine’s boo hoo.

    or I will have to resort to Plan B :-)

  350. JustATequilaSD says:

    @RussianSB
    ” include me in culinary list , I will be second after Tina”
    You are a smart and delicious girl, that is why you are currently second after Tina in food list. What is your favorite dish to prepare for “big boys” or what dish will go well with tequila?

  351. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Glad to hear it RussianSB

    Missed you for a couple of days.

    Any exciting plans for this weekend?

  352. DorkyGuy says:

    English Rose was a truly beautiful soul. Does anyone know what happened to her? I don’t think she had much sugar success, but I was always rooting for her.

  353. RussianSB says:

    Beautiful, English Rose, just beautiful !

  354. JustATequilaSD says:

    @SDinLA

    ” Your tattoo is horrid and really really déclassé”
    “you gonna defend me too”
    I’ve already mentioned her tattoo in a similar manner, but perhaps not so harshly. I actually would love to see her remove it. She said as long as she loves it that’s what counts. I wasn’t trying to insult her when I mentioned it, and I’m sure she’ll give you a similar response.

    ” After all, just recently I was flirting with Treasured and asking her to be in our Moscow music video, why would I turn around and say something mean now?”
    To attempt to prove a point, I suppose. You did mention you have white knight syndrome, and you feel that today Treasured is the antagonist. The tattoo thing she may still be able to take that as constructive criticism, but saying I defend bitches may cause her to think twice about the video.

    If I only defend bitches and supposedly have a bitch fetish, what does that mean if I just defended your statement? LOL, you set that up. And no I don’t actually want you to take offense to the statement. I would totally love catching drinks with you the next time you’re in the deep south. I don’t have a ferrari, but I’m sure when we hit the bar, every college girl within a quarter mile will want to work your stickshift. Guru still has his drink invitation from so long ago. It IS a blog. I believe that both of us have it far too good to hold a grudge from some petty online foolishness.

    re: the blog
    Everything was calm and settled. I even went back to the topic. Rather than discuss this with me in private, you have chosen to re-ignite the public circus. I have taken the dignified approach, and attempted to be pleasant in light of your potential animosity.

    You may feel free to exchange emails with me, if you would like to continue to discuss your White Knight Syndrome, or grabbing some tequila.

    Thank you for your continued patronage and support. :)

  355. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Hi Everyone.

    Is everyone keeping well?

  356. RussianSB says:

    @Tequila (almost forgot)… include me in culinary list , I will be second after Tina ! I feed 2000 people everyday !

  357. The Silly Hippie says:

    @ Dorky Guy
    Very cool darling! I think life is too short to be unhappy. So manany people waste so much time and energy looking at other people than facing themselves. Too much energy is spent on asking why or playing a victim rather than solving the issues.
    I have had very generous pot SDs but they were so negative (underr the disguise of realists) that I just couldn’t stand being around them. Why waste my time on an energy drainer? I don’t need money at the expense of my sanity! They can find an SB who wants to be brought down in misery with them.
    Anywho super happy today! Life is happening, good and bad, but I just have learned not to let the bad stuff bother me anymore. Not saying it isn’t easy but I am saying it is worth the effort! :-)
    Much love & light everyone!
    Hope we can be more inspirational people on the blog from now on! :-)

  358. RussianSB says:

    And you neeeever know what works with men.
    So, I did drop L-bomb and M-bomb and nobody even send me to…. Match !
    I will explane , why I am looking for husband in sugar pool.
    Because sugardaddies are the best !
    They are generous, they are caring, they are true gentelmens .
    If I am going to see everyday someone’s face, better it will be someone like that.

  359. The Silly Hippie says:

    Ugh well looked like the bickering stopped for a minute there, so yay good news! Lol
    Anyways, omg a PA would be lovely, and a full time housekeeper that cooks would be fabulous! Not on a working, college going SB pay tho! Lol who knows maybe someday! I spent 7 hours in the kitchen making homemade chicken broth from scratch, while studying for a test! Exhausting! Well worth it though.
    Nothing beats homemade, low sodium, fat free, and organic food! Highly doubt any housekeeper could satisfy me and my standards! :-)
    How is everyone else doing? Any valentines day plans yet? It’s sneaking up so fast on me!

  360. RussianSB says:

    Girls, behave !
    What we all witness here – is the same when, you, boys have treesome ??
    Two women in one bed… thinking about each other appearance :)
    But, Jersey Darling, you take it with class, congratulations !

  361. DorkyGuy says:

    I just realized something.

    I looked back at the blog entry from exactly one year ago today. Boy, that was a whopper. There was a complete blog meltdown with SarahSweetheart. Almost exactly one year ago to the day. Brandon and Jenn both had to get involved.

    What is it about Valentine’s Day that causes the blog to melt down?

    Since Valentine’s Day is a day of giving, maybe this thread will be inspirational…

    The most inspirational thread on the blog (in my opinion) is this one from just before Christmas last year:

    http://blog.seekingarrangement.com/sugar-daddy-and-sugar-baby-x-mas-gift-suggestions/#comment-273008

    This specific comment is StormCat describing a hand-crafted jewelry box that he was making for his SB. The context of the thread included SBs and SDs talking at length about what they were doing *for* their partner, not getting *from* their partner. It was absolutely inspirational, and restored a little of my faith in humanity!

  362. SDinLA says:

    @fly(r) YOu’re missing an “r” in your blog name!

    @all, I repeat:

    Critiquing someone’s appearance/attire/sense of style/profile when they ASK you to do so = helpful

    Critiquing someone’s appearance/attire/sense of style when it’s unsolicited = supercilious, catty and mean spirited

    But if we’re allowed to to dole out unsolicited “advice” then I guess I won’t hold my tongue either…

    @Treasured Your tattoo is horrid and really really déclassé. You know they can do amazingly effective tattoo removal these days. I had 3 SBs, none of them had any tattoos. I grew up in and hang out in circles where “billionaire” as an adjective is almost assumed. None of the wives/GFs/mistresses/SBs of the men I know would EVER do that to themselves, and no wealthy men I know would find such a hideously disfiguring act of self-mutilation attractive. Maybe if you got rid of it you’d be able to pay off your mortgage sooner by attracting a higher class, wealthier bunch of SDs. Although I suppose if my face were not very pretty I would try to draw attention to another body part, and a massive, ugly side/back tattoo serves that purpose admirably.

    (Just dispensing advice that will hopefully help you with your goals, darlin. Hope you’re not offended LOL LOL LOL Can’t be too thin-skinned on the blog!)

    @Tequila Are you gonna defend me too since you can’t see why what I wrote could possibly be an insult? After all, just recently I was flirting with Treasured and asking her to be in our Moscow music video, why would I turn around and say something mean now? Or do you only pander to females who are being bitchy?

    (Again, it’s just a blog, right? When are you, Guru and I gonna get together to sip a glass of AsomBroso Reserva Del Porto?)

    😉 😉 😉

  363. JustATequilaSD says:

    Back on topic.
    For Valentine’s Day, I will be giving a special young lady, a very hard time. :)

  364. SD Guru says:

    I see that after I implored the blog community not to start another mess, some people just can’t leave well enough alone. Commenting has been suspended for a few hours so people can cool off and regain their common sense.

  365. fly says:

    Re Jersey and the Necklace

    I agree with Jersey – I accomplished the mission.

    It would be interesting if SA would release some of the information they have from posting just pictures . Which ones are most frequently selected. If you keep all but one photo constant and switch out the same SB or SD photo what does it do to the response rate . Perhaps a small premium to members to have this information reported privately

  366. Frank says:

    On another note, these nested comments are not working for me. There is no way to tell when someone has responded to a post, other than looking at recent comments, and that only shows the last 5 comments, about 5 minutes of comments some days.

    • DorkyGuy says:

      The nested comments wouldn’t be so bad if everyone had gravatars. It is easier to keep track of the conversations you are involved in if you can identify all of the authors at a glance, without reading their names.

  367. Treasured says:

    Yay! Yay! Yay! Italian teacher is super hot, man and under 50!!!

    Gonna be fun!

  368. London Girl says:

    Just thought of lots more I want to add but I already made my moving on point… Bugger!

    Oh well… Yes, the weather is lovely today, for once it’s not raining and London seems to have escaped the snow so I think I’m going to do something productive and go shoe-shopping!

    Play nicely children.

    @ Jersey, please, pretty please with whipped cream and a cherry on top come back… Or I’ll sulk!

  369. Treasured says:

    Humppp…. Nice weather today, isn’t it? :)))

    To change the subject. I am starting to learn Italian today! Am very excited! I will speak 7!!! Seven!!! Languages, ladies and gentlemen!

    Tirindindindindin!

    And, as I decided to go back blonde in a few months, that will make me the smartest blonde ex sugar addict on Earth!!!

  370. London Girl says:

    Wow! Does nobody in America sleep anymore?

    I think that it’s a fairly generally agreed opinion that the insult aimed at Jersey was fairly explicit and not in the interest of self-improvement. Criticism is absolutely fine when it’s asked for, unasked for it becomes something different. I have no problem with people speaking their minds, I am renowned amongst friends for my spectacular bluntness and sometimes painful honesty, they know never to ask me a question unless they genuinely want to hear the answer. The point here is that Jersey at no point asked for a critiquing of her profile, her attitude or her avatar, therefore the criticism was not just unwanted but gratuitously mean-spirited.

    In none of Jersey’s posts have I ever read that she is unhappy with who she meets, how she is treated or allowance/gifts, therefore the implied “help” to get her to the supposed standard of Treasured wasn’t requested either.

    A point was made that the way you write you profile and the photos you show will attract the sort of SD you are aiming for. Jersey seems to be quite happy with who she is attracting so I would say she is successful. Treasured chooses to display naked pictures of herself and writes and entirely different sort of profile, judging purely by her posts on the blog presumably she is also attracting the sort of SD she is happy with. So as they are both successful in their goals perhaps it’s a moot point?

    FYI- @ Jersey, if as suggested you were to model yourself after any neighbourhood in London then I would probably not choose Belgravia. It is indeed a very expensive part of London but unless the look you’re aiming for is dowager-duchess or third-world-housemaid then it may not be the kind of style you wish to emulate.

    So having completely ignored my own advice of ignoring trolls and please moving on- Please can we move on?!?!

  371. Jersey Darling says:

    Dorky, that image is cute. I didn’t mean that you were saying that I have to swallow insults :)

    I am highly insulted by what Treasured wrote, but while I didn’t take it personally, it infuriated me more that despite the OBVIOUS and blatant insults, Tequila is actually defending it. This wasn’t a debate to play devil’s advocate in Tequila, she was flat out insulting me. Considering that I come here to help others, I actually care about the integrity of this place and while I tried not to respond to the direct attacks on me, I ultimately felt the need to defend myself. I don’t think I should have to silently suffer insults when I’m just trying to provide guidance myself. Unfortunately, the fact that I decided to defend myself and the fact that she decided to continue attacking and you propelling the conversation forward results in a mess for the blog gods and makes the blog unreadable. So if I want to stay, that leaves me with the option of remaining silent and putting up with the attacks.

    So that leaves me with one other option: don’t stay. Be a lady and walk away.

    So that is what I’m doing. Those who wish to stay in contact with me have seen my email posted in previous posts. Maybe one day I’ll be back, but not for a while. So long, and thanks for all the fish.

    • Frank says:

      Missed a lot of this in real time. Jersey, have enjoyed your comments, hope you come back soon.

    • DorkyGuy says:

      One day, when my time comes and the angel of death appears at my door, I hope I have the presence of mind to say “so long, and thanks for all the fish”.

    • Lo says:

      Jersey come baaack lol scroll up and read my comments! I don’t blame you for being disgusted and leaving though, I can’t believe what was actually defended on here haha wow

  372. Jersey Darling says:

    DorkyGuy, no worries, I’m done. I apologize for taking up as much blog space with this as I have, I should have just not answered and swallowed the insults.

    • Jersey Darling says:

      Unfortunately, since I don’t think I should have to swallow insults just for participating in a public forum trying to help out new people, I think I will just withdraw – for good this time. This has truly gotten ridiculous.

      • DorkyGuy says:

        Nobody says you have to swallow anything… That’s certainly not what I was saying.

        It’s just when I have a personal conflict with someone (which happens from time to time, because I’m evidently tone deaf), I try to pull it off the blog. The only reason to keep the discussion on the blog is a desire to win in front of everyone else. And I can understand that as a valid desire, especially as you were insulted in front of everyone else… but it’s really an unwinnable argument if the other person can’t see they are at fault.

        [img]http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/duty_calls.png[/img]

        Besides, I really *really* like some of your insights… which means I would be honor bound to send spies across New England to track you down and drag you back! I really don’t have any spies to spare right now, so I’d count it as a personal favor not to put me through that.

  373. DorkyGuy says:

    At the risk of incurring both of your wrath… a humble suggestion…

    Why don’t you guys ask Guru for an email exchange, so you can battle this out off-blog? Or, as an alternative, you can set up a free private chat room on tinychat… you don’t even have to exchange email addresses.

  374. Jersey Darling says:

    You know what, I’m not done yet. Why am I the one who has to take the dignified way out when I am the one being insulted? Tequila, perhaps this is how I should have responded?

    Thank you Treasured for opening my eyes to how hideously I dressed. I’m so sorry I’ve scarred your fashion sense for life, truly, I didn’t realize I was doing such a terrible thing by posting a picture of myself. Since it apparently bothered more than one person on this blog, I promise not to do it again. I wouldn’t want to offend anyone else’s fashion sensibilities.

    Thank you sooo much for letting me know I look like a tired housewife of undetectable age. And thank you for pointing out the fact that I have still managed to be pretty despite having a few extra pounds. I didn’t even know I had a few extra pounds, but thank you for letting me know there was something else wrong with me! I’m so grateful to have friends like you!

    And Tequila, thank you for helping me to come around to the realization that I should not be insulted, but should actually be grateful when someone tells me how bad I look. I didn’t realize that just because they throw in some niceties it makes it constructive. You’ve opened my eyes. Yes, I’m actually glad I’ve been called a tired housewife. I also appreciate your advice to “just move on” when you’re keeping the conversation going. Really, you two have given me an epiphany.

    I suppose I’m just one of those girls here that “doesn’t understand” when people are trying to give them good advice.

  375. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Jersey Darling
    “You just don’t get it. Can we go back to making the blog more productive now and actually answering people’s questions”

    The question you kept asking yourself is how to be more productive/efficient/effective in your pursuit of bigger/better sd’s. Or at least this is what treasured tried to answer.

    Somewhere in tonight’s posts is my answer, but I can’t do things with you like a profile review etc like I’ve done for others in the past for fear that you’d take my critiques the wrong way.

    I’m criticized quite often BTW. 50 posts is all you got? Go see how many I have just in this week. :)

    You just said in one of your posts that some girls here don’t understand when people are trying to give them good advice.

    I already get it.

    • Jersey Darling says:

      You keep missing the fact that I never asked. I’m happy with my pursuit of SDs. I’m always open to constructive criticism and embrace it, but that’s not what this was. Even IF the way I dress could use improvement, Treasured could have had the courtesy to email me off blog instead of embarrassing me publicly. But clearly, her intent was not to help me.

      • DorkyGuy says:

        “Even IF the way I dress could use improvement, Treasured could have had the courtesy to email me off blog instead of embarrassing me publicly.”

        Very, very valid point.

    • Jersey Darling says:

      I also never asked for a profile review, a review of my clothing, or a review of my weight or any other physical characteristics about me.

  376. Jersey Darling says:

    @Tequlia, you just don’t get it. If you sat through 50 posts criticizing you (want to go back and count?), from being overweight to dressing hideously to looking like a tired housewife of an undetectable age, you’d eventually get tired of it as well. Since my responses are just propelling it forward at this point, this will be the last one, but I’ll say this much:

    I love when people say something hurtful to someone and then act flabbergasted that they are hurt. Or insult them and then tell them to get a thicker skin because it’s somehow the target’s fault that they’ve been hit.

    Can we go back to making the blog more productive now and actually answering people’s questions like I tried to above? K thx.

  377. JustATequilaSD says:

    @SDGuru

    Before I forget, please give my email address to Treasured when you get a chance.

  378. JustATequilaSD says:

    @DorkyGuy
    “To everyone who is still arguing”
    I can’t compliment her any harder than I already am. :)

    • DorkyGuy says:

      lol! I think Oscar Wilde has some wisdom for this situation…

      “Women are meant to be loved, not understood.”

      • JustATequilaSD says:

        You are a wise man, indeed.

      • DorkyGuy says:

        I’m an self-identified numskull. Big boob bleach blondes (bbbb?) won’t date me because they don’t like feeling that much smarter than their man. I just stumble onto a quote that makes sense every now and then.

      • JustATequilaSD says:

        I see through your attempts to be a bumbling idiot. I know that costume all too well. (Sheep’s clothing with a clown nose at the end. Right, Rudolph?)

      • DorkyGuy says:

        A gentleman is simply a patient wolf.

  379. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Jersey
    I’m not trying to hurt your feelings. I’m not going on about your style. I merely said what I like. You just told me that I did it such a way as to not hurt your feelings. I told you several times that I look forward to your avatars, and now you think of pulling them. I don’t have a problem with your weight, and dresses are easily changed. So why am I still the enemy here? I really wish you wouldn’t take such things to the extreme or so close to heart.

    • Lo says:

      LOL she’s NOT being sensitive, ANYONE would’ve been offended by Treasured’s continuous insults. Like I said it’s not what she said, yes maybe not everyone was a big fan of Jersey’s outfit, it was the WAY she said it. But you are the same person who fought tooth and nail for Cali to stay on the island so..maybe we shouldn’t be surprised?

  380. DorkyGuy says:

    To everyone who is still arguing ~ Your mother is a hamster, and your father smells of elderberries.

  381. Jersey Darling says:

    I let it go about 100 times already.

    And honestly with the way you both keep going on about my style you are starting to hurt my feelings. I’ll stick to a picture of my face so no one can insult my style, okay? Or maybe I’ll forgo the avatar pics all together.

    Moving on.

    • DorkyGuy says:

      If your avatar doesn’t have any clothing at all, people can’t insult your style… just a thoughtful recommendation 😛

  382. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Jersey Darling
    Just let it go. Let this be a new topic, and you both start fresh. If one of your girlfriends said I hate that dress, I can’t imagine you’d even have given it another thought. I remember when Guru and I made what seemed like 100 posts in a “debate” on the blog which then went on in emails to each other. We agreed to disagree, and went back to the blog like we were buds.(I still owe him a beer i think.) Same with SDinLA, if he has a prob with me after the last few days, it’s no big deal. You can’t have thin skin in the sugar bowl. And on the blog, we’re all mostly friends.

  383. Jersey Darling says:

    @Tequila, how do you call something hideous WITHOUT meaning it to be insulting? I love playing devil’s advocate myself, but come on…

    You were able to tell me you didn’t like my style without insulting me. Isn’t Treasured smart enough to be able to do the same? Or is it possible that perhaps she actually meant it as an insult?

    Anyway, Christina Hendricks is much better endowed than I! I love her on Mad Men! I have more of a Kim Kardashian body type – my butt is actually bigger than my boobs 😳 At least it helps make them look proportionate! lol

    • Jersey Darling says:

      And if you’re worried that I took it personally, don’t worry, I didn’t. But it was rude and I don’t tolerate insults, so I felt the need to call it out.

      I will still get along with Treasured as long as she does not insult me. We’re all adults here :)

  384. Jersey Darling says:

    @I LoveWestCoastGirl
    “Jersey.
    You have a super Good writing skills! I understand why SDinLA wants to be friends with you.
    But a lot of new girls are naive and tend to trust older much more experienced SDs, and then come to blog to complain.
    And SDs are NOT “feeding hand” it is more like we are at the different sides of barricade .
    It might not happen to you, but if a few guys/SDs would take advantage of you, lie, … you might realize it. but may be you are lucky and all your expirience will be positive.
    “feeding hand” I thought slavery was abolished, or SBs are guppy fish. this I can not understand/accept.

    First, thank you for the compliment on my writing! :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

    Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had guys try to take advantage – I’ve been lucky enough to realize it in time (don’t know if you were here for my posts on DaddyLovesArmCandy). For many of the SBs who do treat SDs as walking ATMs, they truly are biting the hand that feeds them when they then turn around and call that same SD an idiot. Perhaps there’s a hang up on the expression I’m using, but what I’m saying is when someone is financially supporting you, don’t turn around and say they are an idiot with their money (I’m referencing one of Cali’s posts here). You are in essence saying they’re an idiot for helping you, and before you know it you won’t be receiving any help at all.

    I definitely don’t think all SBs are guppies, but some (and in particular the type I was referencing in my post) can be like that.

  385. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Jersey

    All I’m saying is that I have reason to believe that she didn’t mean it as an insult. I would much rather we all get along so I can go back to sexual innuendos and flirting. I’m all alone, in the middle of the nite with two blog hotties, and I didn’t even get to see the bikini.

    This is the tequila sad face. :(

  386. Jersey Darling says:

    @Tequila – You may agree that you didn’t like the necklace, but does that mean you have to call it hideous? Does that sound constructive to you? There are a million subjective things I could comment on, but I choose not to because at the end of the day it won’t help anyone. And about the weight… you’re too smart to know that’s not a veiled insult, especially since unlike you, I never mentioned being concerned about my weight before she decided to comment about it.

    Re: looking corsetted, I happen to look that way naturally. I’m large busted and I have a 17 inch difference between my waist and my hips/butt. Some like it, for some that’s too curvy. For me, it’s the way I’m built. I’ve got lots of other pictures that show it that have nothing to do with the dress, I just don’t post them here.

    And while I could have posted nearly naked to show off my body, I prefer not to do that, because unlike what Treasured assumed I am not loud and am actually quite conservative.

  387. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Jersey Darling
    And then I miss the bikini??? I’m gonna start making 3 line posts (as requested) so I don’t miss anything.

    @Treasured
    I come with a warning – “Might keep you off the blog forever”

    I warn with a coming — “Thar she blows!”

    I’m such a bad, bad boy.

  388. Jersey Darling says:

    @LookingGlass
    Any other SBs tired of getting jipped? I get these sugar daddies promising a gift….or we agree on a set amount per meeting and he only gives me half saying that he’ll give me the rest next week. Then he’s “mysteriously MIA.”

    What have you other SBs done to try to avoid this?”

    I had this happen once. As a gesture of kindness (it was unsolicited) a potential SD offered to bring $400 when meeting me because he knew I’d been out of work sick and hadn’t been paid for it (I’d had to postpone our first meeting because of it).

    He showed up with $300. This put me in an odd situation because although it was an undoubtedly awesome gesture, he brought less than he said he would. I feared it might be a sign of things to come – and it turned out that it was, he continually did that and he kept reducing allowance amounts.

    The way I dealt with it was I communicated to him how it made me feel. The first time, I said, “It was so awesome of you to try and help me, I really appreciate it. But question – you said there would be $400 but when I got home there was $300. I feel awkward bringing this up, but did you miscount?” He let me know he used the $100 to buy something for himself. I then said, “As awesome as it is that you helped me out, I would have rather you stuck to doing what you said you’d do. We’re in the beginning of our relationship and I’d like to know that if you say you’ll do something I can count on it. The way this this happened does not make me feel good.”

    I gave him that feedback specifically because I was afraid of it becoming a recurring issue, and lo and behold, it did. The next time he tried to short me, I cut him off.

  389. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Treasured and @Jersey
    You two would go at it right as I’m making the most beautiful novel (War and Peace?) related to you both.

  390. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Jersey Darling
    Since I can’t seem to sleep. I will take the time to respond to this. It will be long, since I like you and want you to feel my words. And maybe I will fall asleep typing it.

    “I guess you don’t consider taking a jab at my weight and my “hideous pink shirt” an insult?”

    Treasured is actually a nice person. She may be a little money-hungry, and a little “promiscuous” (her word was a little more harsh), but I have “rarely” seen her go out of her way to hurt someone’s feelings ESPECIALLY when it comes to weight. For example, after a comment where Cali had called me fat, Treasured, simply reminded me that if I did feel I was fat, to take action, hit the gym, etc. I felt no insult from her in that moment. Also, I will remind you of something that is public knowledge in previous SA blogs. Treasured, herself, used to be overweight, and I have only seen her attempt to inspire fellow blogmates with her triumph over it. So I do not think she meant it the way you took it.

    Secondly I hope you wont take this the wrong way, because I am totally excited when it comes to your avatars.(I’ve told you this.) Personally, I didn’t like the bigger necklace. Also, the angle on your pic and the tightness of your dress makes your waist look small enough to be corseted. Before you get upset, and think that I am taking sides, or that I’m taking a poke at you, I will further expand on this. (You know the kind of poke I’d like to take at you, but I’m doing my best to keep this response as non-flirty Tequila.) You don’t need the necklace to highlight your breasts, they were the first thing I saw in the new avatar as your dress seems very tight. (As a red-blooded male, I can’t help smiling every time I look at it, but I’m doing it again, aren’t I?) When I’m not being really silly, I’m rather conservative. I don’t like dresses that are too tight. I like them at least to your fingertips. I don’t like tattoos.(Treasured caught an earful about that, remember.) And I LOVE the color pink on almost anything related to females. (I have 2 little princesses that love pink.) I only speak for myself and what I like. I would hope that Treasured’s comments were thinking of what would appeal to the widest range of SD’s that she has been able to get 3k from. It is still well within your realm to do what you want, you’re a grown-up. Add the new info to your arsenal, and judge where it fits into your strategy. And as I said before, you and London Girl are both well liked here. So I do not think she meant it the way you took it.

    I want all the hot babes on here to get along. So I can find out who makes the best food without alerting any of you to my hidden agenda. Big boys gotta eat. (We all know who’s in the lead? But best foodie is the kind of friendly competition I can sink my teeth into.)

    I’ll stop now before SDinLA thinks I’m sucking up yet again (or trying to steal his pizza buddy.) 😀

    • Lo says:

      LOL why are you trying so hard to defend her??? Werd.. I think anyone would’ve been a bit insulted by Treasured’s second comment. In her first post she called Jersey chubby and told her to clean up her style a bit. In her second post she crossed the line when she practically begged Jersey to remove the pic of her hideous pink shirt. There’s about a million other ways to say that without being borderline offensive. It’s called tact and not everyone has it by default. And there’s clearly different personalities on this blog so you can let go of your dream that all the “hot babes” will get along.

  391. Treasured says:

    Words fail me 😀

    I say that you look great and you call me a troll 😀

    Guess, some people are never happy.

    Moving on too.

  392. Jersey Darling says:

    If it’s not one troll there will be another. Please remind me not to feed you.

    Moving on so as not to clutter up the blog from more important things…

  393. Treasured says:

    Ok. To everybody. YOU ALL MISSED JERSEY IN A BIKINI 😀 And she looks hot!

    ROLF!! It pays being a bad bad girl 😛
    See, bad behaviour gets rewarded 😀

    Tirindindindindin! 😀

  394. Treasured says:

    Ahahaha. Partly 😀 But you do look hot on that picture 😀

    And, again. That comment was re your previous picture. Not re you in general 😉
    Once again, I am not insulting you.
    Don’t you understand it?

    And, since apparently I am the the biggest bitch on the forum, I am adding picture of my chi – Lola. I think I need another bitch to keep me company 😀

  395. Jersey Darling says:

    You would like this avatar better because there are hardly any clothes :mrgreen:

    Tired housewife of an undetectable age? Here we go again…

  396. Treasured says:

    No. Please. Don’t. That already scarred my fashion sense for life.
    😀

    Honestly, don’t you think yourself, that on this picture you look so much better. And actually look hot, instead of looking like a tired housewife of undetectable age? This gravatar – fuckable, other chuckable.

    And, yes. I am like that to all of my friends in real life too. If I think something looks hideous- I’ll say it.
    But so will I say if something looks hot.
    Instead of always saying “you look lovely”.

  397. Jersey Darling says:

    Don’t get too excited that I changed my avatar, the dress will be back 😉

  398. Treasured says:

    YAY!!! Jersey! Gravatar changed!

    Anyone?? On the blog?? Isn’t this MUCH better???

  399. Jersey Darling says:

    It’s also not a shirt, it’s a dress. And soon I’m going to photoshop it hot pink 😉

  400. Jersey Darling says:

    And don’t think for a moment I’m missing what you’re trying to do by changing your gravatar to a troll with pink hair. And leopard pants? Oh, that’s right, that must be part of Jersey Shore style. Sigh. Your intent is crystal clear to me, but others can judge for themselves – I’ve already said my piece and frankly don’t care enough to keep talking about it.

    • Treasured says:

      ROLF!!!

      I changed the gravatar to my conversation with the Tequila about blog needing a new Troll!!!

      LOOOOL! I almost rolled off the bed. Darling, believe me, I do not spend my life thinking about how I can insult people and make their life more miserable.

      LOL! LOL! LOL!

      • Jersey Darling says:

        Oh you mean the one sided conversation where you just posted the blog needed a new troll?

        You’re doing pretty well at it so far 😉 Keep it up and I’ll have to change my gravatar to a duck.

  401. Treasured says:

    But, still stand to my grounds that the shirt must be chucked away 😀

    Previous gravatar was much better 😀

    • Lo says:

      k now you’re rubbing it in and it would be clear to anyone reading through this. I guess you get off on pushing people’s buttons?

  402. Jersey Darling says:

    Just posted it above in a response to your post.

  403. Treasured says:

    Jersey??? At what blimming point did I call you “fat”???

    Please, do elaborate!

  404. Treasured says:

    AND. I have NEVER allowed myself to make comments about anyone’s life or personality neither on here or in my real life.

    Which, is being addressed to me non stop. Just because I have an opinion and express it.

    I do not stomp feet and throw a temper tantrum just because someone calls me an “insecure bitch”. 😀

  405. Jersey Darling says:

    @Tequila:
    ersey Darling: Treasured! YAY for sharing your profile! I found it very interesting.

    Treasured: And… Thank you everybody for compliments re my profile or my looks.

    So, why would she suddenly want to bash this girl that she actually is getting along with?? Let’s all take a deep breath and help each other

    Hmm, I don’t know, why would I suddenly want to bash her unless I was provoked? Perhaps because she called my style hideous and again, insulted my weight. Tequlia, for a woman that is the most catty insult one can possibly give. You should know that well. Ever called a girl fat and seen the reaction?

  406. Treasured says:

    @ Jersey

    “I guess you don’t consider taking a jab at my weight and my “hideous pink shirt” an insult?”

    Hrupft?? When exactly did I jab your weight? When you, yourself, admitted that you have an “average” body shape?
    I recall actually, calling you a “pretty and smart” girl…

    As for the top… Hmmm… Sorry, but I stand my grounds 😛 Don’t mean it as an insult, just an observation. Made, by the way, is a “tongue-in-cheek” kinda way.

    • Jersey Darling says:

      Average ≠ (does not equal) a few extra pounds. That’s where the insult comes in, even though it appeared to be delivered in a constructive way to temper it.

      If it was made in a tongue and cheek way, please remember that we are on the blog and sarcasm doesn’t always translate well. Would you like it if I’d said the same thing about you, even if I was “joking” about it?

      Anyway, I’ve moved on, but after your flat out insult about my shirt I had to address it. You can’t call me pretty and then throw in an insult and expect me not to be offended.

      • Treasured says:

        Ok. No comments re your weight.
        Looks like it is a painful subject you you.

        I am a size 4-6 USA. And I was told I am chubby and should loose a few pounds. Did I whine about it? Nope. Different people, different opinions.

        As for the shirt… Jersey. Just. Think. Re-think. 😀

        Ok, I am closing the conversation. I actually happen to think that on the whole you are a nice person, just need to deal with your insecurities and grow a bit of “skin”.

      • Jersey Darling says:

        1) You insult my weight
        2) I respond
        3) That makes me insecure?

        You truly are trolling now, so I will stop feeding it.

  407. Jersey Darling says:

    Tequila, I guess you don’t consider taking a jab at my weight and my “hideous pink shirt” a direct insult?

    It looks like Treasured’s posts have been removed so perhaps you did not see her second post before I replied, when she asked me to please remove my gravatar with the “hideous pink shirt”. Her first comment was bordering on constructive criticism and although not delivered well, I left it alone assuming positive intent (if you haven’t noticed by now, I actually like assuming the best in people and I give the benefit of the doubt in case they don’t communicate clearly). In fact, I went so far as to thank her for it before an old post of mine was removed. By the time she gave the second comment, it was clear that she wasn’t being nice.

    Anyway, as I stated in my slamwich comment, (I’m repeating the non offensive part of it), where I work we jokingly call it a “feedback sandwich” when you need to give someone some constructive criticism so you layer it between two compliments.

    In the post directed toward me, it was more like one compliment was given as an excuse to layer on two insults. Counter insults aren’t productive, no, but sometimes necessary to remind the person starting the insults of the level they’re actually speaking on.

    Anyway, no worries – I took it in good spirit and even thanked Treasured for the parts of her comment I thought were good feedback. I do not consider her a troll, those two particular posts just happened to be less than tactful.

  408. Treasured says:

    I am glad that the Kraken didn’t get scared by my so called “phenomenal” ability 😛
    I come with a warning – “Might keep you off the blog forever”

    :D:D:D:D

  409. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Treasured
    “I take my fee in “flesh” so to speak ”

    1. I will be charging you. Most rodeos have an Admission Fee.
    2. Based on your phenomenal ability, (since Twiceshy has still not made it back to the blog, not that anything happened per se,) I have been authorized by the Kraken to offer you a discount.

  410. JustATequilaSD says:

    @Treasured and @SDGuru
    It just confused me. Two weeks ago this was the post:

    Jersey Darling: Treasured! YAY for sharing your profile! I found it very interesting.

    Treasured: And… Thank you everybody for compliments re my profile or my looks.

    So, why would she suddenly want to bash this girl that she actually is getting along with?? Let’s all take a deep breath and help each other. **holding hands with all my blogmates*** KUM-BA-YAH MY LORD, KUM-BA-YAH

    • Treasured says:

      Tequila – with the Trolly gone, people want a new one 😛
      Troooollllop 😛

      Have I told you that one of my exs actually called me a “Troll”? 😀 I found it rather cute, actually 😀

      • JustATequilaSD says:

        Naw, no trolls, we’re all friends here. Even I get along with most ppl, no matter how strongly I express my counter points.

  411. Treasured says:

    Tequila – Me “hearts” you 😛

    I am not going to elaborate on what I have said. If people can’t handle a constructive criticism, I can’t help it.
    But then, don’t whine that you have to be happy with a 1K per month.

    From now on, I will only give advice when asked 😀 At a certain fee 😛
    Tequila – I think you desperately need advice on style. Have I mentioned, that for a very close friends I take my fee in “flesh” so to speak 😀

  412. JustATequilaSD says:

    @SDGuru
    What reason would Treasured have to simply out of the blue begin insulting people? Or is she madison too?

    • JustATequilaSD says:

      ” Let’s not start another one.”
      Exactly my point.

      • JustATequilaSD says:

        Or perhaps I should see your words as a veiled insult to me. Perhaps you are calling me a Troll as well. By your logic my counter insults are justified. My constructive criticism to you is to be fair across the board. Because of this feel free to blast me in your reply by calling me an idiot, an insecure jerk, or say I can’t get laid. It’s a blog, I think I can co-exist with you even in the face of such incorrect assumptions about me.

      • DorkyGuy says:

        wait… I am an idiot insecure jerk who can’t get laid…

        You say those things as if they are some kind of pejorative. I call foul! 😛

      • JustATequilaSD says:

        Based on the above logic, feel free to “name call” toward me all you want, as you have taken offense to my non-malicious comment. Take your best shot. Tell everyone my penis is less than 28 inches. I might cry with that one. :'(

      • Jersey Darling says:

        I don’t think you’ve been insulted. Don’t worry, I don’t think anyone’s called your Kracken hideous and begged you to remove it from the site 😉

  413. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

    Dorky.
    Hi
    Do you mean Looking glass did not make him cum ?
    So he thought half of promised $ is OK?

    • DorkyGuy says:

      Not at all…

      I mean if he suddenly discovers that she has a “no physical contact” rule, or some such thing.

      It may not seem like it from a SB’s perspective, but SD’s are capable of being disappointed too. SBs are vulnerable to being taken advantage of (happens all the time). SDs are also taken advantage of (happens all the time). No guy likes feeling like he has been conned.

      If you were in the guy’s shoes, and suddenly discover *at the meet* that she doesn’t look anything like her photos, how would you feel? Or what if she expects gifting to only go in her direction? Would you give her the full amount? Even if it makes you feel like a schmuck?

      I was in one scenario similar to that. I promised a certain amount for a first meet over dinner and a movie, (which didn’t happen because she decided on the spot that she didn’t like movies). No sex was expected… It was just a “get acquainted” thing. When she arrived, I was horrified to discover that she looked nothing like her photos. Worse, she had just a rotten attitude, and she made the evening miserable. Being a man of my word, I gave her what I promised, and afterwards I felt awful. I felt gullible and taken. I felt deceived.

      In retrospect, I was wrong to give her the full amount. As soon as I saw the deception, I should have cut the evening short and given her just enough for gas. And she could have come on the blog and complained about how cheap I was, and didn’t honor our deal, without giving the full story… and SBs on the blog (perhaps such as yourself) would likely agree with her, without asking questions.

      Again, I have no idea if that’s the case in this scenario. Maybe this guy’s cheap and/or evil. But before assuming the worst in someone, I like to see if there is a plausible explanation for their actions. Not all men are evil, and the woman isn’t always right. Both genders are equally capable of telling only the part of the story that supports their claim.

      • I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

        Dorky.
        It was a girl from WhatIsYourprice.

        Usually it is 100$ for a lunch/dinner/movie date.
        You were on blog a lot, you knew better to talk on phone before you meet her , so you would know her attitude is bad. ?
        Did you talk via phone?

      • ContentSB says:

        Can I have your memory??? I can barely remember all of my own dates, let alone dates blog people have gone on!

      • I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

        I meant if a guy loose 100$ and an evening… it is not as bad as a girl exchange body fluids, risk her health (even with condom), open up her heart (a bit – just enough to open her legs)… and then get 100$ (or nothing!) instead of agreed 400$. ?
        from my perspective it is worse for a girl to be taken advantage of.
        but I am a girl, so I have to stand up for girls. :)

        We know u r an honest guy ; and blog SDs r very different from an average SA site SD. :)

      • DorkyGuy says:

        I have never met anyone from WYP. Only SA. And of course I talked on the phone with her, though not at length.. I certainly made mistakes in the process, and missed red flags. I am not sure how that changes anything though.

        All I am saying to you is that the reflex to side with someone without knowing the whole story often does not do them any favors. If you take the time to get the whole story, you can offer them honest (if uncomfortable) feedback, instead of just giving them the response that they expect based on the what details they chose to include in the story.

  414. SD Guru says:

    @JATSD

    It’s admirable to be a devil’s advocate and always take the counter point. But at some point an insult is plain to see no matter how you spin it. I agree the counter insult is not productive, but we should remember what prompted it in the first place.

    Enjoy your Valentine and Mardi Gras holidays!

    ———————

    Thanks to JennSA for cleaning up the last mess. Let’s not start another one.

    • Treasured says:

      Mmmm…. “Devil’s advocate”.

      I think you just made both Tequila AND me so much more attractive 😛
      Everybody loves bad boys and girls 😛

      But, really, am I THAT bad?

      Although, I do have strong believes, that if I exorcise my devils, my angles might leave too :)
      To be bad, and yet, at the same time, “oh so good”, is much more fun than being just plain good :)

  415. DorkyGuy says:

    @LookingGlassSB
    “we agree on a set amount per meeting and he only gives me half saying that he’ll give me the rest next week. Then he’s “mysteriously MIA.”

    Playing devil’s advocate… Is there any possibility that he came into the meeting with expectations that weren’t met, and so didn’t feel obligated to give the full amount? Possibly he went MIA because he discerned that you guys weren’t on the same page?

    Not saying that’s what happened… but it sounds like a possibility.

    If you guys don’t have a crystal clear conversation about expectations prior to the meet, it’s hard to complain if one or both of you come away disappointed.

  416. JustATequilaSD says:

    I made it over 24 hrs before someone said something so out of place that I had to comment on it. Maybe I’ll be next on the mod list.

    @Jersey Darling and @London Girl
    ” constructive criticism is one thing, but veiled (or in the case of my gravatar, flat out) insults are another”

    Treasured has never given anyone an indication of a veiled insult. This is not Cali we’re talking about. I think you have misunderstood her intent.

    In both of her comments, I believe she sincerely is attempting to critique constructively. The first comment was based on her own specific style and technique for snagging 3k+ sd’s.(Which she has done.) The second comment was still in line with this sincere act.

    I understand many people have been feeling overly sensitive with the Cali-SDinLA ordeal. However, I am sure you can understand that we are all friends here (for the most part.) Even after the last few days, I hold no malice toward SDinLA, it’s done, new topic, I move on. It’s just a blog after all.

    Your counter insults:
    -“case of being so insecure in themselves and their own lives”
    -” the I-can’t-get-a-manwich?”
    -“Better yet a bitchwich?”
    are also counter productive, and can only lead to a repeat of the last few days.

    Being an sb/sd will require thicker skin than this, to avoid such misunderstandings. I agree with both sides expressing their opinion on which techniques they like and relate to, but I’d hate to see another blog opera. If I have misinterpreted your counter insults, then I apologize in advance.

    P.S. – I was not leaving the blog because of the ordeal. I simply want to begin focusing more on the upcoming holiday. I’m sure there’s an absolutely gorgeous, kind, caring, can’t-wait-to-get me undressed girl out there waiting for me to be her Valentine. Therefore, I shall blog much less, and frolic much more.

  417. ContentSB says:

    I am so out of the loop…. but I like seeing some old bloggers making a comeback! Great to “see” you guys! I hope everyone is doing well and livin’ the dream!

  418. SD Guru says:

    @LookingGlassSB
    “we agree on a set amount per meeting and he only gives me half saying that he’ll give me the rest next week. Then he’s “mysteriously MIA.”

    I’m sorry to hear what happened… again. This is not the first time you’ve come to the blog to express your frustration with SD’s who are not genuine. As the saying goes, fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me. And fool me three times…

    So stop doing what’s not working for you and do something different. I’m sure others in the blog can give you useful advice like they did before.

  419. Stacy, says:

    @WestCoast, of course he’s in love. 😉 that’s what I’m good at.

    @Russian – never offended by references to my designer trinkets. Lol

  420. fly says:

    @Looking Glass “Any other SBs tired of getting jipped? I get these sugar daddies promising a gift….or we agree on a set amount per meeting and he only gives me half saying that he’ll give me the rest next week. Then he’s “mysteriously MIA.”

    What have you other SBs done to try to avoid this?”

    Two avenues of thought

    A – You learned a valuable lesson early about this “SD” and perhaps about your screening.

    B- If it is about a real SD vs occasional P4P an initial ” deposit ” of half a month is something that the gentleman should initiate. Perhaps a discussion opening with your interest only in a continuing relationship and a warm, subtle challenge to him to demonstrate his commitment is appropriate. He needs to convince you he is serious.

    Note I realize some SB would expect more up front and I am really just focused on a minimum expression of commitment. But for the man to leave you without even the agreed amount for the meeting is very bad form.

    Perhaps somewhere in the early phone conversation you create your mystical friend George, your very protective friend who treats as his little sister. You casually mention that George is just back from his third Seal deployment.

    As Capt Kirk would order on the Enterprise, keep the full array of sensors deployed for any of the flake signals.

    Yes it happens to all of use in business, friendships and even love but you can do a lot to put the odds in your favor. Learn to recognize the danger signals and especially when someone is taking advantage of your expectations.

  421. Beach_Girl says:

    RussianSB~ I am not a Troll and I don’t have multiple blog personalities

  422. RussianSB says:

    Blog Gods, thank you to take care about blog, I know that we must just skip insulting posts and not read them, but I read everything automaticly, much people do the same.

  423. RussianSB says:

    I wonder… what new name troll will invent to post under ?

  424. RussianSB says:

    @Jersey Darling, I love pink ! It reminds me ”Legally blond”,
    it is me minus Law scool !
    I don’t have any biotchy attitude, averybody knows that I am looking for love on the site, strings attach and eventual marriage ! It is my hidden agenda…
    not so hidden now, because all of you run a few times in my profile.
    So, ideally, I am that woman, who don’t really care about exact numbers … :)

  425. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

    SDinLA.

    I see you do not love me anymore, :) :(
    So I will not swim /do cat fights in your caviar fountain anymore.

    У вас астенический хвост после гриппа (поверьте мне как доктору) отдохните 2 недельки.

    SDinLA “I am an attention whore after all ” I wish you would be just a whore (in a good sense of this word :) :)

  426. RussianSB says:

    @SDinLA
    ”Ditto RussianSB and ILWCG, I am sure you’ve had your share of wealthy guys take you out, but how many have turned into steady, reliable SDs who met your expectations for 6 months or even a year or more?”
    Dear, if only smaller size of allowance was the guaranty of long term arrangement… or make man more ”reliable” , now, I want you to be realistic here.
    And I really think that 2k is decent allowance, I never say otherwise. And I joke about designers presents , meaning Stacy case (Do you mind, Stacy?).
    But I still pointing out that even giving 2k allowance + sugar spend on dating, and having several SBs (men tend to that very much, let’s be real here too) , and we still have wealthy man who can afford that ! I just ask you, guys, don’t adress to average income, sugar is not affordable for average income. It is simple math.

  427. Stacy, says:

    Looking glass , as I often say: Never trust an SD until he’s proven himself!

    If he doesn’t give something he says he will, deal breaker, immediately. He is stealing from you!

    Would you give your hairdresser half of what she asked for? No sex for men who give incomplete allowance!

    • I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

      Stacy I like this your attitude much better than “do not bite the feeding hand” attitude.
      And

      “Designer gifts, debit card, a Tiffany gift after our first (no sex) date, slid extra cash in my purse, etc” and you know his only for “a couple weeks” . ?
      is he in love with you?

      SDinLA. I am too kind, so I work hard to make myself cynical so dishonest guys would not take advantage of me. I wish I would be cynical, thank you for compliment .

      Jersey.
      You have a super Good writing skills! I understand why SDinLA wants to be friends with you.
      But a lot of new girls are naive and tend to trust older much more experienced SDs, and then come to blog to complain.
      And SDs are NOT “feeding hand” it is more like we are at the different sides of barricade .
      It might not happen to you, but if a few guys/SDs would take advantage of you, lie, … you might realize it. but may be you are lucky and all your expirience will be positive.
      “feeding hand” :( I thought slavery was abolished, or SBs are guppy fish. this I can not understand/accept.

  428. RussianSB says:

    @SDinLA
    Nice, that troll is dead, don’t be modest, you disturb the troll nest :) THANKS
    You don’t read much my old posts, I am simply joking that ”men are dogs” –
    I have no personal reasons to biotch about men, they do nothing bad to me, only good things. I also can understand both parties, not only SB-version of arrangement.

  429. LookingGlassSB says:

    Any other SBs tired of getting jipped? I get these sugar daddies promising a gift….or we agree on a set amount per meeting and he only gives me half saying that he’ll give me the rest next week. Then he’s “mysteriously MIA.”

    What have you other SBs done to try to avoid this?

  430. DorkyGuy says:

    I have noticed that many of the comments in these blogs would have satisfied the word count requirement for my dreaded 7th grade geography report.

    http:: three.sentenc.es may be onto something

    I am not looking at you, SDinLa… I know that you are going to compile your blog posts into a single document for your doctoral thesis, so you get a pass.

  431. London Girl says:

    Or a PA for a few days who would sort out all my paperwork or a seamstress who would fix every button/loose seam in my wardrobe…

  432. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    I would settle for a housekeeper for a week with all the chores done and cooking.

    Coming home after work and having nothing to do but chill including the weekend. Heaven :-)

  433. Jersey Darling says:

    @Hippie, I’ve been joking about that myself! I keep things clean but it takes a lot of effort dusting the tops of ceiling lights etc. I actually looked into a maid service, but then you start reading all the bad reviews and you change your mind…

    But I still want it!

  434. The Silly Hippie says:

    All I want for valentines day is a maid. Not because my house is filthy, but because I don’t have time for a deep cleaning such as scrubbing the stove or cleaning the air ducts, but damn that would be nice!
    Any other ladies find that like a plan?

    • SugarB says:

      Exactly what I need right now… Cleaning and sanitizing the air duct systems in the house, gutter, chimney sweeping also… I started to search for the services companies earlier today. Haven’t made any appointment yet :) there are scamming with some ads on services too I read online. Maybe just have to go with the more expensive services for the more quality work done. I sprayed the Stove earlier, let it penetrate over night and finish the job first thing before work…. Dear SD! please send me some services to my house ASAP as Valentine gifts. I promise will spoil you triple in return anyway you chose 😉

  435. London Girl says:

    @ Jersey, very true, if they’re fixated on your mani-pedi you’re probably doing something very wrong!

    I think with a lot of people it’s a case of being so insecure in themselves and their own lives that the only way they can make themselves feel better is to put other people down subtly, or as in recent cases extremely unsubtly. I wouldn’t pay any attention to them, it’s more symptomatic of their own inadequacies than any reflection on you, your style or your personality.

    BTW, you don’t look even slightly overweight to me but you do have fabulous boobs!

    @ SDinLA, ding dong indeed! This blog is so much more fun and readable without people trolling for attention they lack in their own sad little lives!

  436. DorkyGuy says:

    Does the new blog support images in comments? Let’s find out!

    [img title=”xkcd valentine”]http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/valentine.jpg[/img]

  437. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Welcome back SDinLA

    Where has everyone gone?

    • Jersey Darling says:

      The whole ordeal with Cali chased a lot of people off the blog. At least 4 posted they were leaving publicly, and more left without saying anything. Hopefully they will trickle back in now that it’s resolved.

  438. SDinLA says:

    Critiquing someone’s appearance/attire/sense of style/profile when they ASK you to do so = helpful

    Critiquing someone’s appearance/attire/sense of style when it’s unsolicited = supercilious, catty and mean spirited

    Then again, I love a good cat fight, so “Rawr!” 😉

    Woohoo! What’s this I hear?!

    Ding Dong! The troll is banned. Which old Troll? The Madison Troll!
    Ding Dong! The Madison Troll is banned!

    Muchos gracias mods and SA overlords….

    Apologies to all for contributing to the drama, I was just hoping to reclaim the blog and make it readable again. Let’s see… make dramatic post re: exiting, come back soon after…. SACRE BLEU, I AM AN ATTENTION WHORE AFTER ALL!!

    Re: Valentine’s Day, I think I’ve posted my thoughts on the topic here before (which echo WCSD’s thoughts re: it being a contrived holiday.) so I shall spare you all the diatribe again.

    Re: expectations for allowance, what is acceptable etc., that is one of the most beaten dead horses on the blog, so here I go kicking the poor horsey corpse some more.

    Yes, it is possible to find high dollar allowance SDs. No it is not common (especially if you don’t live in NYC, LA etc.) No we do not expect any woman here to “cheapen” herself by accepting an allowance that she doesn’t consider adequate. But as genuine SDs who WANT SBs to find success in the sugar bowl, we simply want to point out the reality of the odds a SB faces.

    Jack’s post in the previous blog discusses many of the sobering numbers for SBs. And you can’t change the fact that the odds are against the SBs. 10 SBs for every SD on this site. Discount the number of picture collectors, time wasters and guys looking for cheap sex, eliminate the guys who are genuine SDs but can’t provide a $10k allowance, or even a $5k, or the quoted “average” of $3k, and it’s looking pretty daunting for the majority of women who sign up in hopes of becoming a SB.

    Much of it depends on what you are looking for. Treasure, I’m sure you’ve had some guys who will splurge on you. We had a former blog SB from next door to you in Scandinavia who had great success finding very wealthy men who’d fly her off around the world for a weekend…. but those arrangements never lasted long. Ditto RussianSB and ILWCG, I am sure you’ve had your share of wealthy guys take you out, but how many have turned into steady, reliable SDs who met your expectations for 6 months or even a year or more?

    Those guys don’t tend to stick around because they DO get the “kid in a candy store syndrome.” If a SB is OK with something that is short-lived, lives in the right areas, AND has the necessary attributes re: looks, seductive skills etc., sure she can pursue those types. But as Stacy is finding out, those types of guys usually don’t last long UNLESS you meet their expectations, which might include being their on-call mistress and such and/or they turn out to have other major downsides to go along with the lavish gifts.

    Stacy- the wanting you to move in, especially so quickly, is a huge red flag. This guy may be generous right now, but he is most likely going to be very possessive and jealous… is that a price you’re willing to pay to get the blue box on the first date?

    I have mega-wealthy friends who spend six figures or more a year on women they’re not married to… but those women are their mistresses. They have to be on-call 24/7. yes they have a nice condo and a fancy car to drive, but it’s still not a lifestyle all women seek or can pursue, and it’s still a cage, even if it’s a gilded cage.

    And RussianSB and ILWCG…. you’re both quite jaded and cynical with your “Men are dogs” attitudes. Clearly you have NOT been able to find stable, LONG TERM SDs who will meet your expectations. So are you better off than the SB who doesn’t want designer stuff or the 5-star experiences and finds a SD who can “only” provide her with 1-2k per month? To some women, 1-2k a month to supplement their income, if they are in a smaller town/city and are just looking to pay down some debt, have less stress re: finances, could transform their lives, especially if that 1-2k is consistently provided and long term. I would never expect either one of you to lower your expectations, but your results also might serve as a warning to new SBs who are looking for a stable, long-term SD that they should not dismiss offers of a certain amount.

    (ZOMG, I’ve turned into VA Gent!!!!! ;-))

    It’s not one-size-fits-all. And I have stated my belief in the past that what happens between two consenting adults should not be any concern of the government, so I have nothing against those who choose to be escorts or to frequent them. And at the other end of the spectrum, I have nothing against people seeking a BF/GF or true love here. I just want to present a realistic view to any newcomers to this world.

    You guys have heard my horror stories, what an idiot I was when I first tried to be a SD. The ridiculous sums I got taken advantage for, so I’m certainly not the type to be cheap… plus I’m not looking for a SB, so I have no agenda to “drive down prices via lowering expectations.” I’ve always had white knight tendencies, and tried to “rescue” women. So when I talk about not giving people unrealistic expectations, it is solely in that context: to try and give new potential SBs a realistic and balanced view of what the sugar world can be, and what might make sense for them.

    If you live in NYC, are either supermodel attractive OR skilled at the art of making yourself desirable to wealthy men, sure, go ahead and hold out for the 10k and up SDs (But even then don’t expect them to be around for the next 2 years.) But let’s not ignore the reality that it is a very small % of SBs on this site who will find a genuine SD, let alone one who will provide the fairy tale luxury goods and 5-figure allowances.

    P.S. I don’t have an issue with people sharing their experiences… whether their experiences are haute couture or not (Hey, I’m the one with a chocolate and caviar fountain in my back yard 😉 I had an issue with a known troll who’d been banned before and had a proven record of posting under many aliases just to inflame the blog making inflated claims just to make herself feel better, belittling other people’s posts/being mean spirited, and posting her BS so often it made the blog virtually unreadable.

  439. Classic Noir says:

    So… what’s the best gift you’ve ever received?????
    Let’s see I’ve gotten tons of Tiffany, Gucci, Louis Vuitton, and Non Designer Name Jewelry, Designer handbags, shoes, clothes, and kitchen appliances(my number 2 fav) but the absolute best gift ever is and was the investment in my future by way of currency…for real estate property and business startup. As the Chinese Proverb says “Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime”.

  440. Jersey Darling says:

    @Stacy, I think you’re doing the right thing! That’s awfully early to make such a big change.

  441. Stacy, says:

    @Jersey, yes we’ve been talking for about a month but just met a couple weeks ago – he wants me to move in, but not in a relationship way, I think he just wants convenient access to sugar whenever he’s around. He’s that “I want you at a moment’s notice” type of SD.

    I don’t do live together – I like my independence too much, even if he does travel 20+ days per month.

  442. WCSD says:

    @Bella – Just to give you my perspective, I am single, and am a firm believer that if I’m asking someone to be exclusive, it is no longer NSA. But, if I was married and screwing around on the side, I can understand why I’d want her to be exclusive. It for me would be more around lowering the risk of me catching something and passing on to my wife. As a single SD, I know what my risks are, and I am willing to take them, but don’t like the idea of pushing an uniformed risk on to anyone.

    As always, the best suggestion is to talk with him about it. Tell him how you feel, and truely listen to his motivation. If you can’t agree you are in the same boat as you are now (next) but if you can, then things could work out well.

    • Bella says:

      Thanks for the perspective. I mean I get that it could be about reducing the risk of bringing anything home to his wife, but the exclusivity doesn’t mean NSA to me. I mean, even if we were exclusive I would demand the use of a condom because there are no guarantees he’s not seeing someone else or that his wife isn’t cheating.

      I’m meeting a pot SD tomorrow and I have the feeling it will go well. Hopefully I’m right! But if not it’ll be back to the drawing board. I’m not writing him off or anything, I’m just looking for someone who’s idea of NSA fits with mine off the bat.

  443. Treasured says:

    @Bella- that means he wants unprotected sex but reserved the right to dump you any time he will get bored 😀 Skip that one:D

    • Bella says:

      Ha! Thanks, that’s what I was kinda thinking too. I’m not interested in exclusivity…especially when he has a wife. A bit of a double standard there. Anyway, I don’t think I’ll be meeting him anytime soon. 😛

    • I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

      +1000

    • DorkyGuy says:

      I disagree… For what its worth, that would be my ideal situation, because of health concerns. People can agree to be monogamous to protect each other’s health without violating the NSA concept of emotional ties.

      You might find that someone who is more careful about their health, and isn’t into filling their bedpost with notches, is less likely to kick you to the curb on an impulse than someone who is cavalier and promiscuous.

      • Treasured says:

        Dorky – being monogamous is great. But, it is definitely NOT NSA in that case.

        A guy, who demands NSA AND being monogamous before or at the first meeting, wants exactly that: unprotected sex and to keep the right to disappear straight after that 😉

  444. Bella says:

    Pot SD #3 tomorrow! 😀

    @Everyone
    What, in your mind, is NSA? I was speaking with a pot SD who claimed he wanted things to be NSA…but demanded exclusivity. To me that’s not NSA. Any thoughts?

  445. Jersey Darling says:

    @Stacy, this is the same SD you just met and he’s talking about moving in?

  446. Stacy, says:

    Actually West Coast, that’s not it at all. He has been incredibly generous with me. Designer gifts, debit card, a Tiffany gift after our first (no sex) date, slid extra cash in my purse, etc.
    He didn’t break up with me, he was having a moment of insecurity about my intentions – due to his past SB calling to hiss in his ear.

    I didn’t choose anything because I don’t need to view this arrangement in such immediate terms and we were running out if time before his flight, I wanted to leave him with sexy sugar memories.

    He wants me to move in, be available all the time – and I won’t do that. So, he started thinking I was only willing to give him scraps and he got wounded.

    We resolved things, and I imagine a beautiful little turquoise box (and/or the Burberry cashmere coat I loved but they didn’t have in the right color) will be coming my way for Valentines. In addition to a nice 5 star trip to somewhere warm.

    I’m playing a longer sugar game than the immediate “what can I get” approach.

  447. Treasured says:

    ILWCG – Nope, still here 😉

    Полностью согласна. 😉

  448. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Hi Jack

    How are you? I miss your input on here.

  449. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

    Stacy
    Now may be you r upset with yourself ! that u were not smart enough to get the bag (or anything) during your shopping trip.
    I bet if he have got u the present , Invested ! in you – the more valuable you would be to him.
    He would not break up with you if he just invested a 2K purse in you .

    Now he has no interest seeing you – why would he be giving you anything ?
    you r not his family, co worker, long time friend , you have no mutual friends – it is easier for him just ignore you.

    you should not just have got the purse , emotional compensation .
    at least you would not be upset or feel used now.

    how come you went shopping and got back empty handed ?
    next time get something – you can always exchange it later if u do not like it too much.
    I would not blame a guy , I would have blame myself for not being decisive and not buying a present .
    But I do not know exactly what happened , for how long u were together, how much$$$ he helped you before.

  450. JennSA says:

    It recently came to my attention that we had a little blog drama going on. We are all adults and we shouldn’t have to put any one in time out. We want the conversation to flow freely, and we want people to be able to come here and seek advice, get inspired and vent, just NOT at the expense of others. So please remember to be respectful, and try to contribute to the conversation in a positive manner. Let’s just all try to get along and make this blog a safe place to speak again.

    Cheers,

    JennSA

  451. Stacy, says:

    West Coast – apology presents make everything better, whether they are truly needed or not. Lol.
    We went shopping together this weekend and I didn’t choose anything, so now’s a perfect time to make up for the Gucci’s I almost chose but didn’t.

  452. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

    Stacey.
    He was Generous$$$ (as you said ) , he was honest, and you want more – an apology. ?
    may be my expectations r low now days. :)
    I try not to expect much, so I do not get disappointed.

    I wrote here about my recent steak date , the guy was so good , neat, smart, sexy, 6.2, generous , spent around 1000 on our first date. Texted me back and forth compliments for a week…

    a week later wrote – sorry , I am back with my ex GF…

    I wrote “thank you for letting me know, wish you all the best, may be we can stay in touch and be friends”.
    it would be too good if he would have decided to be my BF, SD… I even did not wish about this for a day. Coz I do not want to be upset or disappointed .

  453. Stacy, says:

    I have no interest in a traditional relationship right now. And, when we got talking I realized it was his last SB buzzing in his ear that I was only with him because he was so generous. What’s that they say about pots and kettles? Put a stop to that garbage! I think apologies should come with a double C logo or a turquoise box. Lol.

  454. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

    Stacey.

    It is good he was honest enough to let you know that!
    Some guys r cowards to be straight forward.

    And would write you “I broke ribs this month, I have business trips next months….” and you would be in a midle of nowhere.
    At least he let you k now you should move on.

    Or ! he want to have you but without SA/SB ($) thing. ?

    If he is not married, sexy, attractive , successful … may be you can consider to be with him without SD relationship. ?

    if he is married – when just move on.

  455. California SB says:

    Ah, Valentine’s day… so many men, so little time……………..

  456. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

    http://fashionwashere.files.wordpress.com/2011/09/sophia4.jpg

    Treasured.

    R u here or you left too?:))

    I found a profile photo image for Jersey Darling .
    Хотя моя любимая Божена Рынска называет этот стиль портовая проститутка, but I think it is very stylish and not cheap , not too revealing.

    I hope the link will work and the photo show up.

  457. fly says:

    @stacey “Wow! SD just calls with a bombshell – arrangements make him feel bad about himself. Obviously, I don’t want anything to do with that! Feeling frustrated now, I never even brought up gift$, he just gave them.

    It may be something very different.

    Future note, for the non control SD- letting him know that you appreciate him (assuming you do) goes a long way to
    de-transactionalize the relationship and the sugar flowing . It’s not an arrangement, it’s an investment in the future , he’s changing the world one SB at a time.

    The control SD likes to feel that his money gives him power so the approach is not likely to be helpful.

    Someone earlier commented that the $500K/yr income SD knows (and cares) about the all the Rodeo Drive “stuff” . I’ve traveled with an awful lot of Dr’s, guys who flew their own jets, owned companies, race car teams, etc and either don’t know or don’t care about that. In essence, it’s a marketing challenge……. In LA one of the better sources of SD’s are guys whose wives and daughters are out shopping all day.

  458. Lo says:

    mmmm I want pear shaped diamond for valentines day!!!!!!!! Oh wait I don’t have a boyfriend….or a SD…and I’m not yet a SB…this poll doesn’t apply to me

  459. The Silly Hippie says:

    Okay maybe I am weird, but jewelry is very personal to me. I have met very few people who can pick out a piece I will like and actually wear. This does not mean that I do not love it or that I would not appreciate it, however I probably wouldn’t wear it. I would love to be taken to pick something out. Is that just me? My mother and sister are the same way.

  460. Frank says:

    Hello, hello! Any body left in here?

  461. Jack says:

    I second WCSD’s post.

    Nobody has to leave the blog, all you have to do is NOT respond to offensive posts. Responding to offensive posts NEVER fixes anything. And it takes far less time to NOT respond than to respond. And NOT responding shows more maturity than responding.

    Nuff said (I hope).

    Jack

  462. Beach_Girl says:

    Flyr~ Yes, being happy in an “arrangement” for me, is what counts.
    Yes, the allowance, gifts and mentoring are a huge plus!

  463. Beach_Girl says:

    Russian~I guess everyone is sensitive, I wasn’t being condescending towards you , I was replying to your post. And just to let everyone know, not everyone gets designer stuff!
    Your post:
    “RussianSB says:
    February 4, 2013 at 12:10 pm
    Nor all potential SD ready for an arrangement, not some SB are.
    A lot of people here also Sugar-curious.
    Be ready for 50 dates (with designer wallets etc.), at the end of adventures quest you will be with ONE (we don’t need more) reliable SD and 50 designer triffles, don’t give up !”

  464. fly says:

    @beach girl = Maybe I am not meeting the type of SDs you are, but I am happy, thats all that matters

    worth repeating for both SD and SB

    My guess is that there are more SD’s looking for a reasonably attractive , intelligent, nice SB than looking for the perfect arm candy.

  465. fly says:

    @Lady V ” have always had my eye on particular piece of jewellery, believe it or it is from Tiffany’s and I aspire to get it one day but what I would really like for Valentine’s is a really great evening in fantastic company with a surprised gift. Am I settling for too little? I dont think so, but such memories and secret smiles remembering it all.”

    I think what Jack has been hinting in his eloquent posts is that sometimes asking for/expecting less becomes more. …………….

    As a friend who remains nameless once commented, there’s a world of difference in the way you treat a beautiful car loaned by a friend and a Hertz car.

    A bit of business advice from the past – NEVER buy a used Hertz car in an area that has a race track or driveable beach.

  466. WCSD says:

    As for the blog subject, I’ve always hated Valentine’s Day (whether in sugar or not). It is just a marketing ploy to sell, sell, sell. And if you really are only appreciating someone (or being appreciated) one day a year, there are much bigger problems in your world.

    So in general I don’t do anything extra for Valentine’s day. I think my sister did it best, and got married on Valentine’s Day. Then you are celebrating your anniversary rather than this silly ‘holiday’.

  467. WCSD says:

    Haven’t you all dealt with toddlers before at one point in time or another? The quickest way to shut them up is to completely ignore them. Without the reaction they get bored and do something else. As Guru says, stop rewarding bad behaviour, and attention is a reward to this one.

  468. California SB says:

    Tiffany rules….

  469. London Girl says:

    @ Cali, the words condescending/patronising/rude clearly mean absolutely nothing to you do they?

    I’m out of here as well, really can’t be bothered dealing with trolls.

  470. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Guru.Could you please exchange my email address with RussianSB. Many thanks.

  471. RussianSB says:

    Blog Gods, I am out from the blog – some strange things happens here.
    I will return after ghostbusters cleaning. Ciao!

    • JennSA says:

      Hi Russian SB, sorry for all the drama, and sorry it took me so long to get wind of it. I think we have nipped the drama in the butt and hopefully you can come back and join in on the conversation. We’ll miss you!

  472. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    HI RussianSB. There is only one of you :-) Fantastic as always.

    I just need to find a date then for the 14th….. will let you know how it goes :-)

  473. RussianSB says:

    How it possible to confuse me ? Only ME have snowball !
    I think it is someones multiply personality talking …

  474. RussianSB says:

    Hello, Lady V !!! It is normal expectations, I also not treat V-day as a big holiday, but simple romantic evening with special someone.

  475. London Girl says:

    @ Russian, I think Beach_girl was confusing you with Cali…

  476. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Hi Everyone

    What does everyone wish for for Valentine’s Day?

    I have always had my eye on particular piece of jewellery, believe it or it is from Tiffany’s and I aspire to get it one day but what I would really like for Valentine’s is a really great evening in fantastic company with a surprised gift. Am I settling for too little? I dont think so, but such memories and secret smiles remembering it all.

  477. Beach_Girl says:

    Russian~ I never got designer anything! doesn’t mean I wasn’t or am not successful 😀 Congrats that you get all that, but some of us don’t…
    Maybe I am not meeting the type of SDs you are, but I am happy, thats all that matters

  478. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars!

    Guru~ Hi, How have you been?

    As for Tiffany boxes and such, that is not my priority. GianMarco Lorenzi would be nice 😀 but I love shoes. I could take Louboutin’s too
    We all want different things out of sugar, what works for me, might not work for someone else. My wants & needs are different, we are all different. Whether you are model looking, young, older, Curvy, Tall, there is someone out there for everyone. To say that someone doesn’t “fit” the image, I’m sure not all SDs want the same image! What makes one happy doesn’t always mean it would apply to another. Whatever works , whatever makes you happy.

    Have a great day sugars

  479. RussianSB says:

    Nor all potential SD ready for an arrangement, not some SB are.
    A lot of people here also Sugar-curious.
    Be ready for 50 dates (with designer wallets etc.), at the end of adventures quest you will be with ONE (we don’t need more) reliable SD and 50 designer triffles, don’t give up !

  480. RussianSB says:

    Amen !

  481. SD Guru says:

    @Stacy
    “Wow! SD just calls with a bombshell – arrangements make him feel bad about himself.”

    I’m sorry to hear that but it doesn’t surprise me. Here’s what I wrote in my blog about SD’s like yours:

    “Here’s one of the most counter intuitive lessons for SB’s to learn. That is, a SD’s wealth, income, and lifestyle may not directly relate to how generous and how willing he is to provide an allowance. He has to be able and willing to do so. Some wealthy men are willing to spend lots of money on fine dining, travel, and gifts because they think sharing a piece of their lifestyle is good enough to be a SD. But when it comes to providing an allowance they think there is a stigma associated with it as if they’re too good to be “paying” for a SB. Therefore, for SB’s who are looking for an allowance, these wealthy men will just end up wasting their time.”

  482. RussianSB says:

    About having multiply sugarbabies …
    That is MORE real situation. Man of means can have 5 SBs (one SB – in every city he travel on business) giving each one 2k allowance – which still hit 10 k level (2k x 5 SBs). I am not judging, if I were man I did the same :)
    All that man ask – it is meet once a month (let’s be real – he has bisiness, wife and 4 other SBs) , but still that ONE day you must be 100% available.

    To have 10k SD is to win Jack Pot…but some of us are passionate gamblers ! :)

    • California SB says:

      10k sugar daddies do exist and I talked to a few of them online. But the 10K dudes want you to be ready in one hour to travel to singapore…. not me.

  483. California SB says:

    It took me years to find my SDs and I put a lot of effort on our sugar relationships. Total sugar meetings with them a month averages 10 to 12 times, with each time averaging at least 6 hours to 12 hrs. So… if I calculate by the hour … I make about 80 dollars an hour.

  484. RussianSB says:

    About successful sugar fairytales… And why they put those Tiffany boxes picture ?? How not to have big expectations after ?
    I don’t know, I don’t know …

    • I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

      Exactly.

      New inexperience SBs might think this is what they r sup post to get – Tiffani boxes.
      And then SDs would complain “my SB saw Tiffani boxes at your blog , now her expectation unrealistic , please ban Tiffani boxes from blog, it harm new SBs”.

  485. RussianSB says:

    Hello, Jack !!! It is very wise of you not to mix in Drama Theatre performance !
    You are example for us all !

    About presents, being entitled Russian Princess, I think Godiva chocolate box – is apropriate gift for Valentine day ( fine for me ). Maybe, lingerie. Romantic dinner, or if SD is married – he should send SB with her friend to nice restorant. Or she going to stay home all day and having bad thoughts about his spending that day with wife.

  486. RussianSB says:

    Stacy example – very REAL example actually. The most popular situation (2-3K per month, which averages out to about $1,000 per visit with an SD). While having multiply SDs is unreal – I just don’t like the idea (one at a time, girls), but it is also impossible technically, and I will explane why. We recieve allowances not for our waxing, nails and hair done (as most women think) BUT for being available for meeting and travel when our SD have some free time and want spoil us a little :) . Modern SDs are not jelouse at all for other man, but they very jelouse for their preciouse time. To refuse to meet few times – the best way
    to lose your SD. We have our own life and jobs(college) and we need to manage our free time to match our SD free time. Girls , who have 2 SDs complaining, that by some magic SD1 and SD2 will be pick up the same dates for meeting, dinners, travel. So, I think, to have 2 SDs is the way to lose both.
    And SBs confessed that they lost some grate SDs not being able to travel.

  487. Treasured says:

    Hmm… I “made” much more than 12 000$ last year… And I do not even count holidays, gifts etc… And it was even with me fluctuating time by time if I want this or not (so wasn’t an x amount every month).
    Unfortunately “lots” is a relative term. It depends on the circumstances and commitments…

    Talking about gifts? Honestly, at the moment I just want my mortgage to be paid off. So, a nice letter from the bank “paid in full” will do me 😀

    But, apart from that, diamonds always are a girl’s best friends.
    And, also EXPERIENCES. Some unforgettable moments with someone special.

  488. Stacy, says:

    Carried over from last blog…

    Wow! SD just calls with a bombshell – arrangements make him feel bad about himself. Obviously, I don’t want anything to do with that! Feeling frustrated now, I never even brought up gift$, he just gave them. Wish he’d come to this realization a week ago.

    Any one have advice?

    Regarding annual sugar – $12,000 in cash and gifts last year, and I’ve been in the sugar bowl about six months. Some months I didn’t have anything going with anyone, sometimes there was more than one guy. So I consistently received 2-3K per month, which averages out to about $1,000 per visit with an SD. And, it takes a lot of time and effort. Sugar dating at that level is not a casual approach.

    • California SB says:

      He wants free sex Stacy… he was hoping you were going to fall in love or something and give it to him for free…..

  489. Frank says:

    I’m not yet ready to discuss my income as a SD, but will discuss my SB’s. She is working full time as a mid-level clerk for the Federal Gov. She has been there for a while and is at the middle of her scale. She has some some years of college but didn’t graduate. She is typical of the middle class woman in this area. to make more she would either have to be in management, or have an degree with a specialty, such as accounting.

    She brings home after taxes about $1000 every two weeks. This is for 40 hours plus of work, plus putting up with a supervisor who doesn’t like her very much. From her sugar relationship she gets about that, and she sees me one or two hours each week.. As best I can tell, and from what she tells me, she enjoys the physical part of the relationship and enjoys our time apart from real life.

    She seems happy with getting less than that $3000 per month figure, and in fact has doubled her salary by taking up the sugar life style.

  490. Jersey Darling says:

    As for gifts (this is a case where gifts > financial assistance), definitely jewelry for me. :mrgreen:

  491. Jersey Darling says:

    Carried over from the last post, in response to Jack:

    1. Of course a good point, sugar is rarely consistent. I’d contribute my own numbers, but I started toward the end of 2012. If I break down the amount of money I made for the hours actually spent with the person (excluding sleeping), I made $186/hour. This isn’t including the time spent in texts, phone calls etc – just time spent together. It’s amazing to be getting money while having fun too!

    2. The figure above doesn’t include wining, dining and presents. (Though my presents were never of high monetary value; I got that horrible ceramic stripper shoe and some some other gifts that were really thoughtful.)

    3. Fantastic point. Tequila mentioned above about me trying to raise my allowance by offering exclusivity (and I do think exclusivity is worth more). The truth is, the men I’ve been with wouldn’t be able to afford it. They were already pushing their limits just to keep me around. And if I ever sensed a guy was offering more than he could afford (this is what happened with my second pot SD when I was trying to have two at once), I declined because I don’t want to drain someone’s resources. To me that crosses the line into taking advantage.

    As a side note, the majority of men I’ve had interested in me make between $150 and $200K a year. Some make up to $250K. Yes I’ve had the people who claim to make more and offer higher allowances, but they rarely come to fruition. I met one person who was quite wealthy, but though we had fun together it never progressed to an arrangement; he’d just give me money for travel expenses. Of all the men I spoke with, though he was the wealthiest he also gave the least.

  492. TravelMuse says:

    Second!!!

  493. Michael Alleycat says:

    First!!

  494. JennSA says:

    All personalities and perspectives are welcome in the blog, while personal attacks and name calling are not. It’s inevitable that there will be disagreements but let’s handle it as mature adults with class to keep the dialog constructive and respectful. Please refer to the “Blog Etiquette” for more details. For the newbies, please take a look at the “Sugar Daddy Dating Tips” section on the right for a list of commonly discussed topics and the “SD and SB Blog List” section to see the perspective of other sugars. Now comment away and let’s enjoy the blog!!

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