8 years ago
Sugar “Players”

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While having fun is at the heart of what SeekingArrangement is for, the joy  isn’t meant to be one-sided. There have been reports of sugar dating game-players on both ends of the spectrum, and for the victims of some players, it’s not until the game’s over until they knew they were playing.

Yet having a “playa” mentality isn’t the same as playing games according to many sugars. In fact, having a “playa” mentality in Sugarland is thought to be one way of keeping the heart-strings from developing in a no-strings-attached arrangement…

“Lets just take it as a learning experience…. for my self… I am really becoming a little hard in heart. Almost “playa” mentality. Sounds bad, but it protects me from the “what’s wrong with me” mentality. I am confident with me, I think a am absolutely “Fierce”. A lot of these jokers want looks and no brains. I am the first to say lets have fun… but they seem to get it twisted and expect more just because they have $$$, or just dismiss. Just as there will always be women sweating them, there will always be another CM sweating me.”-2Chic

Do you think it’s wise to have a “playa” mentality to avoid becoming too emotionally attached with a sugar?

Have you ever felt like you got ‘played’ by a Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby? Care to share?

What have you found interesting about a sugar lately?

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1,011 Responses to “Sugar “Players””

  1. SoCalHoney says:

    CdnGent- It’s sad but $$ talks…would i ever do it? I’d say no, but you never know until put in the situation… some say there’s a fine line between SB’s and whoring yourself out….I personally feel like being paid just to hook up is crossing that line…but some have twisted the SD/SB world into that I guess

  2. CdnGent says:

    I assume SCB meant to say $1,000 pay per play? (1000k would be a million bucks! Hell, I’ll sleep with the guy…haha!) Since I have nothing to lose and I do love a good discussion on all things taboo, I’m curious to know if everyone would consider a thousand dollars a cheap romp? Just curious. I’m not really a fan of the ‘pay to play’ concept but I know that some set up things more temporarily in the beginning until some trust has been established. Anyway, I was just curious. It would seem to me that some SBs might be perfectly content seeing an SD for $1000 (or less?) each time they got together for dinner and ‘dessert’.

    Okay, now i’m getting the hell outta here before the cops see me.

  3. SCB says:

    Hey everyone,
    I hate to put people on blast like this but two guys really just pissed me off and I would like to protect the rest of you from them….

    Bradley from Los Angeles— Picture collector alert! Wanted to see my butt before my face. So annoying. Even insisted is not a picture collector in initial email.

    NYC79 (mike)— Has MULTIPLE profiles and is looking for a cheap romp. 1000k pay per play. If you turn him down he has nothing but nasty things to say. But he will offer more if you come to him.

    I can’t believe I am posting this but these men need to stop trying to take advantage.

  4. East Coast Filly says:

    Hi right back at ya Anna 😉

  5. cleo says:

    lily has made it clear that what she does works for her and her sd’s… i’m not really sure why we think that she’s being dishonest with them. i know at first she was in a dither trying to figure out how to deal with it but as far as i know since then she hasn’t worried about it.

    i just don’t get why we’re so judgy on this one i really don’t

    crucify and judge? really? those are the words we’re applying to a woman with two men? are we sure it’s not envy? because i don’t see how calling a man simple is crucifying and judging

    we are talking about arrangements with married men who are CHEATERS okay? how the hell is it okay to judge a WOMAN for having two men but cheer for the men only because they PAY? seriously this is ridiculous.

    i know of at least one man who has had more affairs/sugar babies than he has had YEARS OF MARRIAGE but no one judges him because he has the money and he’s an all mighty SD. it’s ludicrous. and frankly, if lily thought she was hurting someone i am absolutely certain she would stop.

    i also think that her perspective is unique and that if the experiences of one sb drive the sd’s away because she’s awful and terrible then well i’m not sure those sd’s understand the deal in the first place.

    and yes, if paid extra i would go exclusive for a married SD.
    yes i’m unlikely to have two sd’s (lol or even one)
    yes i live vicariously through lily
    yes i would have sex with someone who wasn’t my SD and NOT consider it cheating UNLESS HE WERE SINGLE.
    .
    AM: i haven’t been smudged in so long… need someone to come do my place with me…

  6. Lily says:

    Flo – I can agree to disagree quite nicely. I reallly like 99% of what CdnGent posts, and hope he doesn’t leave the sug fam. I disagree that he hasn’t been condemning in attitude. The tone was, even if there was no specific and overt condemnations to me personally.

    Jade, I *heart* you!

    Off to the new blog….

  7. CdnGent says:

    For the record, I’ve never condemned Lily for her approach to her sugar life. It’s just not what I would do and I’d HATE to be decieved. I have gone into this being honest about my situation and what is currently at stake. There is no hypocrisy in my approach as you don’t know what the reality of my marital situation is. The point of the matter is, I can only be intimate with one person at a time and that is JUST ME! (Well, two if someone is willing to bring a friend. LOL!) All I want my pot SB to do is to TELL ME if she’s going to be doing this with another. Period. Is that so hard?

    And Lily, if you’re being 100 per cent up front, that’s all anyone needs to know. Go for it! I have NOT condemned you. At all … not once.

  8. Jade says:

    Go lily.. Go ! * in my cheerleader skirt doing high kicks *

  9. sugarbarbie says:

    Hey…there’s a new blog!

  10. Flo Rida says:

    CdnGent & Lily – looks like I have front row tickets wow – ok i’d like you to both kiss and shake hands. We can agree to disagree and still get along. Best

  11. Lily says:

    CdnGent, you did use the word DISGUSTING (in all caps) to refer to an attitude with any sort of sympathetic slant towards women. Pretty strong statement. Also….

    “Oh and yeah … the support of SB’s looking to secretly juggle multiple SDs? Ick! Perhaps there should be a contract signed? LOL! ”

    So they can be with their wives and I need to be exclusive towards them?! I don’t think so…. If they don’t bring up exclusivity, it’s assumed that they want it? Also I don’t think so…. and when I was asking advice on how to handle a bit of secrecy about multiple SDs, it was Because I was going to be out of town all week with one, and not really wanting to rub that in the face of the other, who would naturally be a bit wistful that he hasn’t had the chance to experience that sort of thing with me (yet).

    I could tell everything point blank to SafetyNetGuy about zazazoom, etc, but he hasn’t asked and I don’t think, given how ‘into me’ he is, he would enjoy thinking about it, in detail, rubbed in his face. He’s infatuated with me, so of course he’ll be a little jealous to hear details of me & another man. He wouldn’t break off our arrangement, but it wouldn’t make him happier to know about it, and we’ve agreed that this is a NSA, in true form, and we’d only discuss fun topics when together. I don’t think this would be fun for him. Actually, come to think of it, he has told me point blank that he doesn’t mind the thought of me with another man as long as I used a condom, and even if I wanted to have him + another guy at the same time, he would be cool with that. But asked that I only choose a guy who wasn’t noticeably ‘bigger’ than him. Sorry, TMI; I just remembered that conversation just this minute…..

    zazazoom has explicitly said he doesn’t care how many men I am with.

    SO there you have it. Blessings.

    My blog crush on you is pretty much over, CdnGent, as soon as I felt judgmental vibes from your direction. But that doesn’t mean I don’t like reading your posts. No hate from my direction, towards anyone.

  12. Anna Molly says:

    Lily ~ Smudging is a ceremony performed with either sage or sweetgrass to cleanse away negative energy surrounding a person or place. 😀

    Hi CDN and ECF 😀

  13. Lily says:

    What does ‘smudge’ mean?

  14. CdnGent says:

    Good morning everyone!

    Lily … interesting that yours was the first post I saw when I came in this morning. You actually illustrate my point with your rather verbose response quite nicely.

    Yes, I’m aware that women’s rights are relatively new on the timeline of human history. I think, however, some tribalistic societies may have been or perhaps still matriarchal in nature, no? Frankly, that’s the way to go. Generally speaking, women are more compassionate thinkers and their maternal instincts would gererally serve the world wel.

    That said, you quite neatly underscore my point with your post in that you forgive so easily on the one side becaue women just aren’t supposed to be “programmed” that way and you condemn on the other side because, well, men are. It truly makes no sense to me. I’ve never felt the need to be violent simply because I’m the descendant of a chest pounding neanderthal. And even if I have, it’s not really an excuse. And does not the potential ‘stress’ of being the gently ‘dominant and breadwinning’ partner in a relationship afford SOME men a little of that sympathy? I can’t imagine why it wouldn’t.

    Humans in the last two or three thousand years have very quickly had to evolve, perhas beyond their primal capacity. As a result, we are supposed to take the current sociologically frowned upon thoughts and feelings and hide them under lock and key. It’s not perfect and it doesn’t always work, but that’s what we’re supposed to do.

    I don’t hate ANYONE … men or women. And despite my outwardly conservative guise, I’m rather a compassionate person who perhaps cares a little too deeply and often for those who don’t deserve it.

    In the simplistic illustration I used above, I’m saying that compassion is equally warranted. A lot of people, men and women, require that they be saved from themselves. Those of us more capable of controlling our instincts have to hold firmly onto the notion that we protect those who can’t protect themselves from those who would do them harm….ALWAYS and in every situation.

    One more point … I think as the world spins, we’re ALL trying to get to a better place. Moreover, we’re all trying to make it a little better for those who really matter – our kids. It may not be ‘programmed’ over thousands of years, but I challenge ANYONE to threaten harm to my daughter. You want to talk about primal instincts kicking in? Hoo boy, I’m not envious of the young boys out there right now who one day she may bring home to meet dad. LOL!

    Funny, I read your post and got shivers thinking about 20 years ago when I was sitting in a university English class which were somehow at that time, always ruled by female EAs. I made the mistake during one rather shocking discussion where I was made to feel like I was the root cause of all the world’s evil to ask what the opposite of misogyny was. It was a legitimate question as the term was used often in the class and I honestly didn’t know the answer (sadly, this predated Google and the internet). I was caughtt off guard by the inspired rage and my EA snapped, “Well, there can’t possibly be such a thing can there?”

    Of course, I know now that misandry certainly DOES exist (hell, I think it existed in THAT room that day) and I’m probably guilty of being more misandric than misogynistic. I certainly no fan of blatant displays of testosterone. Men are just ‘dumb’ sometimes, I concede that. But I guess what I’m saying is that BOTH sides are slaves to their prime instincts, most of which we’re loathe to understand. Certainly if it’s difficult to understand what drives US how can we, in simple blanket statements, lay claim to understand what drives others?

    I do enjoy these discussions and I work hard NOT to generalize or offend. But the nature of them and a person’s individual experienes will impact response. Let me re-iterate … I may not agree with everything everyone here says, but I will defend your right to share it as much as I’ll defend my right to comment on it. Moreover, unless your goal is to inflict pain and suffering, I’m your friend. And even if you have, i’ll try to understand why it is you might have gone that way.

    With apologies to Walt Disney, it’s a pretty small world the more of us who get along, the better. There’s enough hatin’ going on elsewhere.

    Love ya ladies! Now, back to work …

  15. Lily says:

    Flo – I have never met any famous alumnae. :( I am too far away to attend events….

  16. Lily says:

    well, the main ingredient in how I am a great SB is my effervescent personality. When SafetyNetSD was here today, I knew he had had a bad day, so I just made sure I was ‘on’ and cheerful and funny, as he loves when i am. I really was in a great mood so it wasn’t faking. But I kept cradking jokes and making him laugh, and after 5 minutes he just sighed and said that his main purpose for coming over was already accomplished–he was in a great mood, and the entire horrible day from work was washed away rom his mind. He admired my flowers from zazazoom and I told him that they came from an admirer. He smiled and didn’t pry. I told him about the swedish guy whom I sometimes date IRL, who is hoping to become my boyfriend, but how I wasn’t terribly interested in pursuing it. He again showed no signs of posessiveness or jealouy that I do hafve a social life outside of him. I told him stories about what I’ve been up to, he confided in me about stuff on his mind, and I gave him solid advice about how to handle an interpersonal issue with someone who is becoming stranger and stranger. I didn’t wear any perfume or makeup because he likes me au naturale, and we played wii on my home theater (so cool to have the projector putting the screen on an entire huge wall) in the floor on my living room carpet, giggling like little kids, and when I saw him stare at me that special way, I climbed into his lap and kissed him iwthout hi needing to initiate could feel it sort of knocking-him-off-his-feet, and I felt so happy to make him feel so happy. When he left, he smiled and told me he felt unbelievably good and I think he meant it. And so did I.

    zazazoomSD just called me and we discussed more serious matters for awhile (comparing our experiences of downfall-of-a-marriage), and then I told him about my would-be-date yesterday who didn’t want to pick me up ina taxi (in this weather”) and how the guy didn’t get anywhere with me if he wasn’t willing to treat me better than that. We laughed and laugheda bout it. He agreed I deserved better, and tomorrow, when he takes me to the fanciest restaurant in the country, he promised to pick me up at my door. When we ended the conversation he sounded much more upbeat and energized and in a much better mood than he had sounded for days.

    I know my SDs feel that I am a shining bright light of wonderfulness in their lives. It’s hard to say specifically what iti s that I do, but I am myself, and I let it bubble out from within me, and all over them, and they seem to love it. I have cooked for SafetyNetSD, and I will host zazazoom overnight in my home tomorrow night. A spacious, glamorous apartment in the center of the city, and a lovely hostess within, that they can escape reality and enjoy being inside, is one thing that is sort of tangible that I offer them. I always have great cafe eqquipment to make any sort of coffee drink, and every type of wine ready to go to offer them. Wonderful music playing in the background, candles ready to light…

    If I think of more, I’ll tell you guys.

  17. Flo Rida says:

    Lily – have you met Hillary Clinton at Wellesley fundraisers? alumnae events?

    ok let me tell a story (to distract). SD ran into an Asian transgender lady who wanted to enter the modeling world and was absolutely stunning BUT of course the modeling wasn’t completely accepting. So he asked her (his) permission to introduce her (him) to a part owner of a modelling agency and represent that she was a new modeling talent and not mention the transgender part, and she replied yes. So the part owner of the modeling agency wasn’t in on the deal but is also a good friend of SD. So the meeting happens and the agent is fawning and glowing over her and admits she has a future in modeling and so SD says ‘sign her up’ and after several drinks he agrees.

    Then the model reveals her true nature (not graphically but through words) and the agent is soooooo embarrased and also a tiny bit angry and now any time SD can make a joke saying ‘what do you know about women you wanted to jump Ms X bones’.

    What happened to the transgender model – she had a limited career as a print model but it was better for her than waitressing. Sorry if this offends anyone including transgender people.

  18. Lily says:

    are you talkin’ to me, sugarbarbie? It’s like minus 25 and windy and snowing.

  19. sugarbarbie says:

    Lily do share!

  20. Lily says:

    TT — great idea. I will start describing how I make a great SB more & more…

  21. sugarbarbie says:

    Sooo how’s the weather?

  22. Lily says:

    ECF — Roger that.

  23. Lily says:

    CdnGent wrote, “That said, the double standards displayed here are DISGUSTING. It’s the classic illustration of the man who murders his kids and wife and we all call him a monster. A week later when we hear of the woman who drowns her kids in a car, we shake our heads and wonder what the poor woman must have suffered from. The genders have to do a better job of understaning each other.”

    Yes, of course, the genders should try their best to understand and be empathetic with one another. I’m no man hater. I love men as Cleo does. I love people. I love anyone with a warm and open heart and an intelligent mind.

    But Cdn —- Do you have any inkling as to how recent of a concept “women’s rights” are, in the perspective of human history? For tens of thousands of years, women were basically property (except for a few exceptions here and there, within a few narrow/specific cultural backdrops). There is an extremely good reason that a woman who drowns herself with her kids (or just her kids) might get more than simple condemnation. The mammalian female instinct to protect and nurture her young until they are able to fend for herself is extremely poweful ….even to the point of being self-sacrificing. Examples in reality of the contrary usually point to something having gone seriously awry, either within that female’s brain chemistry, or, more likely, from extraordinarily high outside stress factors.

    Usually these outside factors which led to the woman’s downward mental spiral are pretty interesting. And certainly in support the need for women’s rights activists. Not always. A female can also be a psychopath. But this is highly rare (that her whole life appeared normal and suddenly she ‘snapped’ into psychopathology). These unusual incidents are usually the symptoms that clue us in to an inherent dysfunction within our society. Men who behave violently have less sympathy, because men tend to be more agressive by nature, and it’s usually a fairly simple issue of the man in question crossing the line in terms of self-control and being able to have a healthy understanding of when and where it’s ok to use his physical power (i.e. martial arts, military, self-defense of himself or other victims) and when it’s inappropriate.

    Those men need the law to step in and provide protection for victims or prtential victims, because he’s not able to keep his primitive reactions ‘in check.’ for the society we live in. It’s just less of an aberration, so to speak, from the instincts in our reptilian brain, as opposed to when a woman suddenly starts lashing out in violence. It’s more of a clear cut case of that particular man having issues within himself (usually brain chemistry), and not nearly as interesting/complex as when a woman suddenly offs her kids.

    The most memorable course I took at Wellesley was a comparative literature course on various works which feature the common theme of women who kill their children.

  24. East Coast Filly says:

    Hey Lily, I like reading your posts too but I have an idea, since you have your own personal blog that a lot of us read anyway, why don’t you just keep the longer posts with all details there and not copy and paste here too. If we’re reading your blog no need to bog down this one too with the same exact copy? Just a thought…

  25. Anna Molly says:

    I’m good Taz! How have you been? You don’t have to answer now. 😀

  26. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    YES SMUDGE. 😛

    How are you AM?

    Wow – I really gotta run lol

  27. Anna Molly says:

    Smudge 😀

  28. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    sugarbarbie- I don’t think anyone else here is hating on Lily at all. As Flo said – each to their own – however I think she would like honest opinions – if not she can tell us can tell us so. The bloggers talking to her now have been on this blog for months and months at LEAST and we are just offering some suggestions. Why does there have to be drama started?

  29. Anna Molly says:

    I think the blog needs a good smudging……smudge, smudge, smudge.

    I did my good deed for today 😀

  30. sugarbarbie says:

    Morning you all!

    Lily I enjoy your posts, damn what everyone else thinks. people hate for a reason.

  31. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    Lily – we all love you – you are apart of the sugar fam :) Maybe you could also tell us about the amazing things you do for your sd’s as well!! This is reciprocal and I am sure you can do everyone here a great benefit if maybe you also talked about what you are doing for sd’s…ultimately this blog is supposed to be a tool and that is something IMHO that would be a great resource for some…keep your blog – that is where your intimate and personal thoughts should go (IMO opinion of course)…on blog maybe try and make it more helpful to those that are struggling (having sd’s you are much more experienced than I even though I have been around longer) and you do have a wealth of knowledge to share and offer..

  32. Lily says:

    I’ll *at least* change my tone, that’s for sure. I don’t want to come off nearly as hateable as I have, that’s for sure. I appreciate you saying you feel I am cool, Flo. Likewise.

  33. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    Flo – you have my vote 😉

    Hope everyone has a great day – busy for me – sooo much rather be on the blog lol

  34. Flo Rida says:

    Lily – to thine own self be true – you can only be comfortable within your skin and if you feel comfortable with your arrangemen(s) then that’s all that matters. BUT there are others who will judge you (as they do me) and if it’s ok to be honest about having multiple SDs then it’s ok to be honest about how people view multiple SDs. At the end of the day you are cool in my book (but if you changed your tone a bit that would help you with some people). Maybe the same can be said about me, I admit i’m flawed. Maybe I should have done this offline and I apologize for that.

    James – I support honesty (including chatter and multiple SDs or multiple SBs) but equally i’m an advocate and a voice for people who wanted to change the tone a tad, I’m sure everyone can get along and as Lisa said ‘Who died and made Flo Rida queen’ well no one did.

  35. Anna Molly says:

    Lily ~ It isn’t just about somebody getting their panties or boxer briefs in a wad, but there are some concerns about discretion as well. IMHO I don’t think it’s a good idea to talk about everything the SD/SB do together or say to each other or even talk about their SD/SB with detail because honestly, we don’t know who reads the blog.

  36. Lily says:

    Now if I could just make a sweet sugar comment that is nothing but gushing? And genuine, too..

    SafetyNetSD just came over because I texted him that I wanted him to, and he had been having a horrible day and he was glad to oblige. He brought me groceries that I needed, we played the wii he bought me three weeks ago, had tons of laughs, chomped on garlic together, drank stiff coffee like we enjoy, and by the time he left, we were both smiling broadly. This is the best part–i told him about the swap I’m doing with CA Dreamin and he begged me to let HIM do the shopping for me, because he would really enjoy picking out something that would be a really great, shining example of Finnish design, and I told him that as long as it gets done this week, that’s fine. I will still add a few little goodies to her package before sending it out, but how sweet is it that he wanted to do that for *MY ONLINE FRIEND* simply because he’s so proud of his country and culture and loves the idea of sending off to the US some fabulous example of something from his country, especially to a woman whom I say is a fabulous lady (he trusts my judgement)…..? He’s such a sweetie. CA Dreamin — I promise if it’s ugly I won’t send it to you. I think he was discussing some floral and beautiful shaped but functional pad for very hot things to be placed on to protect the surface underneath…. He swears it looks great and is impressive, but if I see it and hate it, I’ll find something pretty for you…..

  37. Lily says:

    I believe that nothing I am doing is preventing a long-lasting friendship with them, long after the arrangement ends. I know for a fact that neither would get upset to hear all about the other, and probably be happy for me that I am free from financial concerns, since neither can afford to double their assistance. Neither are sleeping with anyone else, and I myself am being safe. Enough said on this….

    TT, I like you a lot. Thanks for your candor. I shudder to think that I am making SDs in this sugar bowl jaded. Perhaps I could post but refrain from speaking so candidly about my complex feelings towards my SDs, who are indeed also my friends (I also have some small amount of mixed feelings, sometimes, about friends I care about, it’s not usually so black and white). I can just be very Pollyanna and speak about only one of them (so as not to piss anyone off) or speak about both of them as if they were perfect, god-sent angels, and gush about how lucky I am in every single breath. I thought I had made it clear that I felt lucky, definitely am into them in many ways, but…. it might not be a sugar relationship to last for years, and it’s not a perfect system. Life is rarely perfect.

    Or maybe I shouldn’t post about my sugar experiences/hunt at all, take away the link to my blog, and just contribute as a general member of the sugar community without much reference to my own sugar life, as Elegant does. I don’t want to jade and scare off SDs…. I do not wish to delete my personal blog, but if the overwhelming concensus is for me to do so, perhaps I will. I never meant to pour salt all over this lovely sugar community.

    If any of the regular sugars here, or lurkers/rare-posters has any opinion, please speak up and tell me your brief opinion as to how I should proceed, in order to ruffle the fewest feathers and make the most positive possible contribution to the commmunity here.

  38. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    Lily – if you or anyone else wants multiple sb’s and sd’s they are entitled to do so. I think the part that the harshness came from was the fact that you aren’t being straight up about having the two sd’s…and ‘interviewing’ more. Just b/c you see the one sd once a month AND he is married – does NOT mean that you should not be honest with him. I think ppl are a bit miffed b/c this is supposed to be built on honesty and maturity – not how we are all going to ‘get rich’ and build up OUR nest egg while scamming unsuspecting sd’s out of their money AND calling it justified b/c they are married. It is just a respect factor and a maturity factor (and yes there is a double standard – but that is the SUGAR BOWL – these sd’s are also showing you a lot of appreciation – if you were providing them with gifts/allowance the double standard would be less likely) – what *IF* one of these guys that you were with intimately gave you a disease? And you passed it on to the ‘other’ sd – who then in turn gave it to his wife…let’s hope there wouldn’t be anymore sd’s to take anything home to their wives too…especially if they didn’t know about each other. Just could be a potential mess and honesty is of the utmost importance in an arrangement. This is supposed to be about enjoying your time with these men (as they are with you) and you are sitting here saying that you ARE, then you crucify and judge them on the blog after they have been sooo kind and generous with you – calling them ‘simple’. There are PLENTY of sb’s here that would take ONE of your wonderful sd’s (gladly) and TRULY appreciate them for all that they are offering. To each his own and this seems to work for you…however…you may be making sd’s jaded in sugar bowl…this is supposed to be about SUGAR – BOTH WAYS (and sugar is just not a sexual aspect for the men)..correct me if I am wrong. Perhaps I will now be crucified. I have to go so I won’t find out til later..Lily don’t get me wrong – I do like you a lot – I just wish you would be a *bit* more sympathetic towards the sd’s you are involved with – and if there isn’t the connection you so desire with them – maybe tell them? And look for the sd that does? Ok I am done…

  39. D D says:

    Good afternoon sugars!

    How is everyone? There is a lot of action on the blogs. And yet again, I’ve missed a gazillion entries. Guess it makes it harder to fit in here but ho hum. Will have to take time to read and catch up at some point but y’all move too fast! :-)

    Do you think it’s wise to have a “playa” mentality to avoid becoming too emotionally attached with a sugar?
    It depends on what kind of person you are. If you are the type who is in it for an experience, short-term, seeing multiple SDs, seeing married SDs, etc then maybe you are probably already a playa. It’s not hurting anyone and you’re having fun. Nothing bad about that.
    On the other hand, if you are not a playa and are exclusively dating one and you dig each other with no complications, then there is always room to progress. Some sugars go on to date their sugars. C’est la vie. No hard and fast in sugarland in my eyes. Each couple sets their own rules. There’s no one size fits all.

    Have you ever felt like you got ‘played’ by a sugar daddy or sugar baby? Care to share?
    Never given a pot the chance, in all fairness.

    What have you found interesting about a sugar lately?
    A fair few things! 😉

  40. Anna Molly says:

    If you’re lurking….Hi James 😉

  41. Anna Molly says:

    Awww, I missed James! :(

    Hi everybody and good morning!

  42. Lily says:

    Anyway, I just caught up with everything I missed while I slept for 11 hours and I will just say that I am glad I was asleep or I would have probably come across the wrong way in defense of those of us who are into having multiple SDs. I have two married SDs and one has said he didn’t expect me to stop dating IRL, and the other explicitly said he wouldn’t mind a bit no matter how many men I would be seeing. Do they know about each other? No. But they have a wife & kids at home so I don’t think they feel in the entitled position to want to stake a huge claim on my life. I know they don’t feel that way, actually.
    Plus, one lives out of town and can only promise to date me once a month and the other one can only see me during afternoons, m-f, maybe once a week. That leaves me with a loooooooooooot of free time, in which neither truly imagines me sitting home alone with my hands folded in my lap. What would be the point in describing my relationship with one to the other? They probably wouldn’t enjoy it, but not make an issue out of it. It wouldnt’ add anything to the sugar relationships.
    I do want another SD. An American or Englishman (no language barrier!!) who I can meet abroad, go to amazing places with, share with, learn from. I want to explore the 7 wonders of the world with him, accompany him on boring work trips, and just in general feel very lucky to be his muse, knowing he had nothing but options but chose me. I would have to streeeeeetch myself in every way, grow even, to be worthy of the experiences he opens up to me. A sugar challenge. I know I could knock it out of the park if I tried. Maybe even have the relationship turn into more, if he’s single. The two I have are dear, but they are relatively simple men, from my point of view. Consistent, intelligent, and reliable, and I very much enjoy my time with them, but it’s not really building memories I will treasure always. I want the exceptional arrangement. While I’m still young and beautiful and single and open to this. I will search SA to find it because I believe i can. And if it doesn’t happen, well I am still heartily grateful for the two ‘regular guys’ that are keeping me afloat (and in style) these days while I apply for start-up grants and try to start my company. They are amazing, and my eyes tear up when I think of how ‘there for me’ they are if I need something. But I know without a shadow of a doubt that even when they are single again, I wouldn’t want to partner with them in a traditional sense, and that the arrangement has a definite shelf life, from my point of view. I like them very much and hope that friendship remains always. Now I’ve ‘pulled a lily’ in terms of blog action and posted too much. I’m sorry.

  43. Lily says:

    I am up way too late. 1pm. Morning ya’ll

  44. Jade says:

    I am up way to early !

  45. SBnxtdoor says:

    Just checking in! Lots of great discussions going on here. My e-mail inbox is empty. I trudge on.

  46. lil'SB says:

    Aww James that’s a really sweet thing to say! So I guess you DON’T mind if I share when my ‘aunt flow’ comes to visit every month? (Ok I have a feeling I’m going to get some hate for that XD)

  47. LASB says:

    I dunno. I was laughing. I don’t take anything on here *too* seriously. Methinks you have a bit of voyeur in you. hmm…

  48. JamesNY says:

    Catching up on the blog out in the OC, surprised at the day’s turn. It seems like, from time to time, people emerge and try to clear out some space for themselves here one way or another, which is easy to do because there’s usually no one fighting back. Free air time and attention. Alpha or queen for the day. I suppose I’ve done it too at one point or another, we all need it sometimes.

    Grown people should be able to have a frank and vigorous discussion, as they say, and there’s plenty of controversial things to talk about here. And there are certainly some genuine differences of perspective based on gender, on which side of the coin you’re on.

    But there’s an edge to the dominant discussion today that didn’t seem fun or positive to me. A touch of hostility and no humor. OK, there’s lots of fakes and fools and people who want to take advantage of other people on both sides. Is that a surprise? I thought we could laugh about them. And then there are some hypocrisies and logical inconsistencies — on a site about having affairs — oh my! Some gentle souls want to share little things about their lives and some want to talk about big things that are on their mind and some people talk too much and some may say things in a not always appropriate way — some people need help and some like to give advice — sounds like any group of people, any community.

    But one thing I know is that no one speaks for all SD’s, let alone me. If the gals want to share their frustrations or secrets or little tricks or favorite gifts in public, I’m all ears. I’ve learned a lot just by listening. I feel a deep affection for all the women here, the ones who are still struggling to find their first SD and the ones who are trying to juggle multiples. More power to them all, no skin off my nose. Maybe it’s because I’ve been lucky here, I don’t know, I’ve had my share of bruises too. But I don’t have a beef against anyone except the individuals who did me wrong, and I don’t see the point in trying to lecture anyone about how they should behave. This ain’t church and it ain’t a classroom and it isn’t anyone’s corporation. It’s just messy mixed up life and the most we can hope is to try to help each other through it as best we can.

  49. Flo Rida says:

    TexaSD – methinks she was an alleged marine wife it was never proven

    Cleo – ok I won’t answer your faq

    Yaz – one day when i’m even older and more haggard and no one will care about secrecy anymore we will meet – no more secrets :-) bliss

    Good night one and all

  50. cleo says:

    tx if she’s still in your head two or three months later…

    night :)

  51. TexaSD says:

    Lol ok, maybe I will, night cleo

  52. cleo says:

    texasd i say contact her to at least get her out of your head. she’s just going to bug you otherwise. just have your smart brain on that day :)

    i’m going to bed, night darlin’

  53. TexaSD says:

    Cleo- Naa, I wasn’t sure on her, I have only contacted about 2 girls… But cleo the marines wife was sooo pretty, and besides, she might not be a wife of a marine…

  54. cleo says:

    texasd i meant napa :)

    you are still on about marine wife? did you ever contact her?

  55. TexaSD says:

    Cleo-lol Do you mean me? or Napa? or did LASB just pass out? you know, I really though I had found her, but then again, i had quite a few asians in my favs lol, I still remember Marine Wife,,, If I ever go out there, dude, i will knock her up lol… Damn that girl makes my blood boil

  56. cleo says:

    texasd don’t you hate it when people disappear without a trace? i end up with this funny niggling itch i can’t scratch…

    mind you it’s only been a couple fo days

  57. TexaSD says:

    Cleo- lol ya I noticed… Ok interesting, I haven’t got anything back from Napa

  58. cleo says:

    texasd i was laughing at lil’sb’s email.. she has a way with words

  59. TexaSD says:

    LASB- lol, Was the age even close?

    Cleo whats funny lol?

  60. cleo says:

    texasd now i want to take you on a snow tour :)
    .
    lasb: well if it didn’t… wouldn’t it go out?

  61. lil'SB says:

    cleo you’ve got mail!

  62. cleo says:

    lil’sb: *dies laughing*

    that is all :)

  63. LASB says:

    TX – Well, I guess I am more mysterious than you think. 😉

    Cleo – Yes, the light keeps evolving for sure!

  64. TexaSD says:

    Cleo- Ya, I want snow too lol, such a long time since I remember snow..

  65. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Lol, gee I really thought I had you, I deleted my profile temporarily so I can’t email or come up with a profile number, Trying to go from memory here… ok, Well maybe I will find you, when I re-make it lol

  66. LASB says:

    Goodness TX, you really should stop before I accuse you of trying to “out” me. But no, that’s not me either. LOL

  67. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Ok, another 1 I remember, is a degree in biogenetics or something lol

  68. cleo says:

    LASB oh yeah i totally hear that, it has been an incredible journey to get to this place where people find me to be a light in their lives… but that doesn’t mean i shouldn’t be working on the clarity of the light right?

  69. LASB says:

    Cleo – It’s been a loooooooong journey. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been known to fly off the handle as much as the next person, but I’ve been working on it, and have noticed a positive feedback loop. Also, I’ll say that it’s not language but where in your being the language is coming from. (pain, competition, fear, compassion, or empowerment etc.) Hit me up off the blog if you want to discuss.

    TX – Nope. not me. LOL

  70. cleo says:

    lil’sb hey i’m not sick, let’s have that coffee!

    i also didn’t call any of those as escorts… i thought they might be wannabe pornstars but a LOT of men have porn star fantasies (which is why there’s the GFE and the PSE with escorts lol) so they are dialing in to a perfect market if that’s what they want.

    maybe they’re escorts, maybe they aren’t… i can’t tell.
    .
    TexaSD it’s actually white for the first time in ages in ontario. but then i’ve been enjoying this winter so far which makes me weird. i hope you get snow, snow is awesome

  71. lil'SB says:

    Oh cleo, of course compensation is implied! It better be LOT$ AND LOT$!

  72. LASB says:

    Lil’SB – Agreed on the dangerous to genearalize. I’ve left it alone. I actually don’t get off putting requests anymore. But yeah, I was sort of surprised that those were what escort profiles supposedly looked like, because they didn’t seem obvious to me.

  73. lil'SB says:

    You know, I’m glad you got the sans panties thing, you’ve got a wonderful sense of humor and it’s providing great entertainment! LOVE the jokes XD

  74. sugarbarbie says:

    I want a SD!
    just thought I would that with you all if you didn’t already know.

  75. cleo says:

    lil’sb i don’t write for free. maybe a year membership or something lol
    .
    yaz: please share the advice, i’m feeling like the whole thing is incredibly pointless!
    .
    lasb that’s impressive, where did you learn to make language do that? i try to say that kind of thing but often come across as superior or mouthing platitudes

    hee one time i went camping with a few friends and it torrentially rained for about thirty minutes after we got there… my sis was really upset at the mess left on this crown land we were camping in. destruction of trees and trash everywhere and so on. anyway she was worried that it would be ‘dirty’ and i said something like “but look, mother nature washed it for us”

    and later she told me that she wanted to kill me for mouthing platitudes at her but that later she realised that it was exactly true and it made her feel a little better.

    anyway how on earth do you skip the initial piss off and get straight to the lesson?
    .
    Flo Rida please don’t answer my faq list! lol

  76. lil'SB says:

    LASB, I think it’s dangerous to generalize what to put and what NOT to put to differentiate yourself distinctly from escorts and sex workers, because legitimate actresses, entertainers and models may feel like their honest profession is under attack and will become unintended casualties. The best advice is just to be yourself and let your own glorious voice shine through.

    Copy and paste is a nono.

  77. TexaSD says:

    LASB- lol I am not going to post it, but lets say your on the left in the picture? and 8 years older than me?

  78. TexaSD says:

    Cleo- True, How is the great white north, Lol it might become the great white south here tonight, Supposedly, its going to snow here….

  79. lil'SB says:

    cleo, I’m not advocating that idea but from the business perspective, it’s probably the most workable right now. I definitely agree that it ought to be viewable only to non-premium members…sort of like a taste test. I hear you on the finance thing…I’m not getting a passport yet cause I got other priorities XD

  80. LASB says:

    TX – I’d prefer you didn’t post it on here, if that’s what you are asking. But maybe send an email via my alleged profile, and then we will know for sure.

  81. sugarbarbie says:

    Flo rida things have changed since then…there is now a downtown in Virginia Beach…about time…still developing though.

  82. LASB says:

    Lil’SB – I also wondered clued people in that those profiles were escorts? (clueless in California over here.) Then I started thinking, geez I better figure out what to say so that there is NO mistaking me for an escort. Maybe that’s why I got the sans panties at Starbucks request.

  83. Yaz says:

    lol Flo

    Good night :-)

  84. lil'SB says:

    Oh a caveat, actually I still don’t think most of them are sex workers, I believe they’re just genuinely hot and know how to play the game, lol.

  85. cleo says:

    lil’sb if i had to be a premium member to post with you guys i’d think twice. well not me personally, i’m addicted to you all now but if i were new?

    i wouldn’t give a crap about some ‘forum’ i don’t think. maybe i would but i doubt it. maybe if you can READ the forum anyway but can only post if you’re premium?

    (so like if they do this i love you all but good bye, i cancelled my cable in favour of free internet tv so like you know… don’t make enough this year)
    .
    TexaSD: no matter where you go if you gather together enough humans there will always be drama. at least here we tend to talk it out until we’re friends again.
    .
    ocsugarbaby? haven’t seen her in ages.

    blog gods do you need someone to fill in until she gets back?

  86. Flo Rida says:

    Sugarbarbie – alas I left over 10 years ago so sorry, i’ve been in NY travelling since then, but I do own a home in Flagler Beach, FL and also one in London, England.

    Cleo – i’ll try and answer your q tomorrow – dead tired tonight.

    Yaz – so sorry i’ll try and be a better person tomorrow.please forgive me and hope you sleep well.

  87. lil'SB says:

    With regards to earlier discussion about professional-looking profiles, maybe I’m naive or stupid but I would NEVER have guessed that those were prostitutes profiles, particularly since of them explicitly said she wasn’t an escort! I just thought those girls were smart to have hired a professional photographer to get such great shots of them, and they’re absolutely gorgeous so who am I to doubt that they’re really models. And I can only imagine the throngs of men out there who are just as oblivious as I am! I’m totally in agreement with Cleo when she said maybe that’s why the ‘real’ profiles aren’t getting as many responses…

  88. LASB says:

    Lil’SB – Looks like our navigational strategies are similar. :)

  89. TexaSD says:

    LASB- ya, but what about the vajayjay parts modeling lol?

  90. TexaSD says:

    Yaz– Coolio, Well a happy and belated congrats lol.

    LASB- Can I confirm your profile?

  91. LASB says:

    TX – Oh, so you missed the post when Elegant was talking smack and spreading negativity and gossip about vajajay parts models, so I stepped in to stand up for them, er, I mean us. Elegant, how dare you criticize my bread and butter.

    Maybe I’m overly optimistic, but the way I try to deal with negativity is to NOT throw it back. Often I ignore it and because I am not engaging in it, the person stops on their own as they are not getting the energy exchange. And sometimes, like with the SD4Me guy tonight, I just say something like “hey, I get that you are wanting to hurt me and I’m not very happy about that, but you may consider how your potential for your own happiness will change if you stop doing things like that.” By the way, he apologized.

  92. Yaz says:

    TexaSD~ I won’t give out details on the blog but all I can say is I am happy I listened to the lovely ladies I met at the NYC dinner(especially Midwest). If it wasnt for their advice, I would have given up a long time ago and not met my SD. Everything is going great. :-)

  93. lil'SB says:

    Yaz, there are always people with contradicting views especially with something as controversial as mutually beneficial arrangements. My only solution to something like that is to ignore those posts, and hopefully drown it out with more positive, relevant posts to keep the conversation moving towards the right direction. There have been many times that I see a post that I would totally have spoken up against in real life, but I restrained myself because I didn’t want to give that topic the attention it craves.

    So for those who thought TL;DR (too long;didn’t read), basically practice tolerance and keep posting positively.

  94. lil'SB says:

    Cleo, there IS a FAQ, but it’s on the main SA toolbar and not linked on the blogs. Maybe you should email SA and offer to type up a new one for them!

  95. sugarbarbie says:

    I never sexted, i can’t even imagine how that would work. lol

  96. TexaSD says:

    Yaz- with me, sexting is 24/7 lol… I do remember someone telling me you had an SD now, how is that going?

  97. TexaSD says:

    Flo- naa, you can’t be OC, I don’t think she likes me, But I wonder how she is doing? Did her bf ever get out of the hospital? I never found out the answer to that? Does anyone know? Last i heard he wasn’t doing so good… hopefully he pulled thru and everything is going good.

  98. Flo Rida says:

    TexaSD – absolutely nothing wrong with you darling, but we need to clone more of you!!!!! maybe i’m OC in disguise!

  99. Yaz says:

    TexaSD~ Is sexting only reserved for night time? lol nope….

  100. Yaz says:

    And yup you are right this is a blog and there will be new people coming on here every day. They will always be welcomed. That is one of the reason why I went to the very first NYC meet ( put together by NY and NCGent), because I wanted to meet new bloggers.
    What I am against is people coming on here with their negativity. The blog does not need that.

  101. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Scoof Umm, Vajayjay parts model…. I need details lol

  102. cleo says:

    crap, forgot to update before posting!

  103. cleo says:

    FL SD: welcome!
    .
    general reaction comments to blog themes:
    .
    on hating men:

    it’s funny because i love men, love them. i have always had more men than women in my circle. do i hate men? lordie no. do i defend them to my bitter female friends? lordie yes.

    but good god do i loathe DATING them
    .
    as for blogging while dating? i am unlikely to post times or places or the like but i think i can make generalisations pretty well and i see no reason to stop giving advice or support just because i have an sd (seriously that’s a funny statement… i think my sd is like my lottery tickets; i play so everyone else can win)
    .
    the problem with forums is that we lose each other. you end up with a whole bunch of little cliques. i would much prefer a chatroom and a blog with comments to a forum…

    that said, maybe just new blogs more often and a better search function on the page…
    .
    re multiple sd’s?

    why is it that we are judging someone for that? i mean i’m not saying *I* want four sd’s but i see no reason why someone else can’t do that. like TLG (TheLongGunman I MISS YOU!) says “we all like different things”

    so like if you want exclusive great but don’t be hating on someone else for not wanting that mmmkay? [yes boys, i can see how off putting it is to read about but well… it’s also real and we try to keep this blog real right? and how is it different from the sb who was the ‘west coast sb’ for a guy with sb’s in all the cities he travelled to?]
    .
    maybe we need to make a FAQ for the blog. i’ll start:
    how do i negotiate an allowance?
    how do i know what’s fair?
    do i have to f*ck on the first date?
    what’s a test drive?
    what would improve my profile?
    where can i get good information?
    etc :)
    .
    NYGEnt there’s a lot of double standards on this blog. this is one of them… the same way it’s okay to call sb’s on their non-sugary behaviour but not sd’s…

    that said, i do think this blog is evolving in a generally positive direction in terms of the way we treat each other.

  104. sugarbarbie says:

    thank you lil’sb and texaSD

  105. LASB says:

    Yaz – I got what you said. I know what I was saying was not the same. It’s just that that’s what it made me think of. Maybe I should think more before I type, but since I’m a vajayjay parts model, sometimes my brain is a little fuzzy. Please forgive the error of my ways.

  106. TexaSD says:

    Yaz- Lol are you Sexting? you little minx… Ya ya ya, SD text me, your addicted lol

  107. TexaSD says:

    SugarBarbie-Ditto about pictures, at least 3 lol

  108. Yaz says:

    TexaSD~ I did go to bed but SD keeps texting me lol so I got up again. Came back to check the blog.

  109. lil'SB says:

    Hey sugarbarbie, I managed to find the link to your profile and all I must say I LOVE your ending paragraph under what you’re seeking. However, it appears that your profile is rather lengthy, and may not be palatable to some SDs who are time-poor, so maybe you could condense it somehow?

    Also, I would suggest posting more pictures, your first one is a little dark, perhaps up the contrast and brightness a bit to make it more noticeable, and post two more pictures in a variety of poses, particularly a far-away shot that features your entire body and maybe one of you doing something fun.

  110. TexaSD says:

    Lil’Sb- Ok, Well now we are chatting, so, feel free to tell me about yourself 😉

  111. TexaSD says:

    Yaz- Ya, I remember a few fights, and some bloggers never coming back again, I also remember sometimes just people have different opinions, and no one backs down from it either. But I been on here for a while, and there will always be drama, Not that I want to create it or anything, I guess everyone has to be an adult and respect other people’s opinion,(wow I can’t believe I said that lol) oh, and you are addicted lol…. or is something on your mind tonight?

  112. East Coast Filly says:

    lil’SB…yes I believe it is a liver or lung, the heart isn’t all one color and doesn’t look like that. Could be a heart after its been through the sugar bowl wringer one too many times, haha

  113. East Coast Filly says:

    I remember when I first joined about a year ago, I mentioned the idea of having a regular forum setting…never happened, lol, and now that I think about it I think it would be even more time consuming. Its hard to walk away from this as it is now!

  114. lil'SB says:

    East Coast Filly – I TOTALLY thought it was a liver! Whatever it is, it’s VERY offputting =(

  115. sugarbarbie says:

    Flo rida – then you probably have a good idea about my selection here. when did you leave the area?

  116. lil'SB says:

    No TexaSD, I don’t believe we’ve chatted before. I haven’t had contact with any texans lately, lol.

    Actually I’m still working towards my BA, so…I guess I lied. I don’t have one yet…but I’m close! Oh Sweet Victory I can almost taste you now….Ahhhhh

  117. Yaz says:

    LASB said:

    “The argument that “the blog isn’t what it used to be” cracks me up too. It’s so Burning Man. Everyone who comes after the first year you went, makes it “not what it used to be.” But then there is someone who went in the years before you did, blaming you for doing the same to them. hahaha.”

    Guess you didnt get what I said. Please re read my post. It is not the new people who are making the blog not what it used to be. It is the constant drama on here that is making the blog not what it used to be. All the older bloggers and even Elegant who talks to some of the older bloggers will tell you that the drama has affected the way people see this blog.

    Good night.

  118. East Coast Filly says:

    I’m with Yaz, the blog is different to me too, I am an old timer but its also nice to see some new faces while I lurk. I think what happens when you’ve been in the sugar bowl a while is its nothing new and you’ve navigated the waters already so theres not much to ask as far as advice, I’ve seen too much already, lol. But thats just me. I enjoy lurking more than posting these days. I am incredibly private too so that may be why I don’t post details. Its easy to forget thats its not just those who post that can see what is written here and once its here, its pretty much permanent.

    I personally prefer one SD at a time but thats just me and to each his own, I would just caution those who like to juggle to try and be discreet with others lives and identities. Its one thing to tell a story but another to give every last detail. I like Flo’s approach in telling the story but changing the details to keep identities hidden. Or take the fine details off into private emails for advice as I did once with NYGent who was very helpful.

    Does anyone besides me think that heart looks more like a liver or a lung?

  119. sugarbarbie says:

    lil’SB I don’t the premium idea…shhhhhh! i don’t want to upgrade. hehe

  120. TexaSD says:

    Lil’SB- Were you the one telling me about Enterprise employees? Where did you get your undergrad? what do you do? lol Kinda curious, maybe we can go into business together lol

  121. LASB says:

    TX – Yes, if you know me from here, my profile will be obvious. Each person has something called a linguistic “fingerprint.” My guess is that mine is pretty distinct.

  122. sugarbarbie says:

    TexaSD – probably can’t see it now because i made changes to it. thanks anyway

  123. lil'SB says:

    WOW the blog moves fast today! I posted and then scrolled up to catch up some more, and then refreshed and then had to catch up AGAIN!

    TexaSD – Nah I’ve just got a BA, but I’m pretty good with critical thinking and analysis. The best alternative I can think of that the blog gods might really like is to make a forum, and only allow premium members access to the forums, as in they can create a profile, post, and view topics and chit chat, discuss and ask things to their heart’s content. It would be a great added perk to upgrading to premium.

  124. Flo Rida says:

    Sugarbarbie – I grew up near Virginia Beach and went to William & Mary for Undergrad as well as University of Sussex in England, I miss it.

  125. LASB says:

    YIKES!! Some guy on SD4me wrote me 10 minutes ago with a joke. Between reading his 4 page profile and keeping up with this blog, I hadn’t written him back yet. So he then writes again telling me I obviously have no sense of humor and that I’m too old. Wow! Harsh! I wrote back saying that I did indeed laugh at his joke, and to please treat the next person he writes with more kindness. Geeeeez, really?!!!

  126. TexaSD says:

    LASB- your description, I am pretty sure its you lol… There is a few in LA who don’t show their face though…

    Sugar- I don’t remember to much of it lol, I would have to see it again

  127. sugarbarbie says:

    Well just any advice on improving it. Maybe something about my profile was turning great POT away.

  128. LASB says:

    TX – I only have one, but when I first joined the blog, I had a different one. I decided to start anew and deleted that one, but I think they don’t take them down after you cancel. How do you know it’s me, then? I don’t show my face. (Or maybe that’s how you know it’s me, since I’m the only one in LA who doesn’t.)

  129. TexaSD says:

    Flo- Anything bad about me?? lol can’t blame me for being curious.

  130. TexaSD says:

    SugarBarbie- Ok, maybe I did see your profile, what was the feedback you were looking for?

  131. Flo Rida says:

    Sugarbarbie – as has been proven in the past I love drama, hey I’m a New Yorker, BUT i’m only saying what is on several people’s minds (expressed to me by offline email) and if we want more SD participation maybe it’s a good thing to tone down the chatter and as NYGent described ‘bragadaccio’. But I might be wrong. Also if everyone is comfortable with multiple partners then great – no harm no foul.

  132. sugarbarbie says:

    Texas – I’m in Virginia Beach

  133. ElegantSugar says:

    Thank you, LASB. I know I have a strong personality that may be a turn-off to some, but I can tell you that I always forge along with good intentions only.

  134. TexaSD says:

    LASB- I dunno, lol. How manny you have? I think have one of them.

  135. sugarbarbie says:

    LASB I always wanted to go and at the last one Eben Pagan was there…I really wanted to go.

  136. LASB says:

    TX – Oh, are you talking about the old one with the burning man pic? haha. Wow, I feel so transparent.

    Elegant – Thank you! I have to say, you are a blogger who came after me who has DEFINITELY added positivity and value to the blog!!!!

  137. TexaSD says:

    Sugarbarbie- I wanna say back east like VIrginia maybe? Or Maryland? oh you wanted feedback, like on the contents, picture, etc??

  138. LASB says:

    Sugarbarbie – Oh funny. I just saw that you said “wish.” I got all excited that there was a fellow burner. haha.

  139. sugarbarbie says:

    I did because i wanted to get feedback but didn’t really get any so i took it down. I really was nervous about putting myself out there like that. Why do you think you seen it?

  140. ElegantSugar says:

    LASB – great point. By the way, I always enjoy your posts. Regardless if they are just for chit-chatting while you potato-chip-mouse away or making a point on something else mentioned or asking a question.

  141. LASB says:

    Sugarbarbie – Oh, so you’re the one who wrecked it. It used to be so cool. 😉

  142. TexaSD says:

    LASB- By the way, I did have your profile saved… lol

  143. sugarbarbie says:

    Burning Man I wish I went to the last one

  144. TexaSD says:

    SugarBarbie- Cool, did you at one time post your profile? I wanna say maybe I have seen it.

  145. LASB says:

    NYGent – You’re too sweet! Too bad you don’t know LASD, because if you did, I’d ask you to hook me up. hehe. I hear ya on the skipping over. I do the same. I probably miss a few things, but that comes with the territory.

    The argument that “the blog isn’t what it used to be” cracks me up too. It’s so Burning Man. Everyone who comes after the first year you went, makes it “not what it used to be.” But then there is someone who went in the years before you did, blaming you for doing the same to them. hahaha.

  146. sugarbarbie says:

    oh lol, I am open to location, my area are slim pickings.

  147. TexaSD says:

    Lol, I should have been more specific, I mean. Like where in the country

  148. sugarbarbie says:

    here and sd4m

  149. TexaSD says:

    Sugarbarbie- Cool, so where are you looking?

  150. sugarbarbie says:

    My intention was to find 1 SD just like in dating I would want to be with one exclusively. But I haven’t come in contact with a POT SD that want exclusivity yet.

  151. TexaSD says:

    Lil’SB- Sounds like you are thinking business, got a degree and a plan?

  152. mommapoppins says:

    so I guess I came in at the right time! Talking about gender!

  153. lil'SB says:

    Hey interesting discussion going on here, I hope you don’t mind if I jump in.

    With regards to starting a new forum, I think what’s preventing the ‘blog gods’ from starting something like that is there’s not enough resources (financial and human) to moderate and maintain it. Furthermore, I think there’s the potential risk that it will divert earnings from the main website as people post their profiles for free on there, knowing there’s really attractive SBs and SDs that frequent it instead of using the services on the main website. One more thing, it could also become a festering ground for MORE drama as people (extremists, fundamentalists, etc.) make fake profiles and/or come up to bash the whole arrangement kind of relationship, then we’ll have hate mail, bad feelings, etc etc. Therefore, it doesn’t make good business sense to start another forum.

  154. mommapoppins says:

    hey everyone

    yaz- good night

    sugarbarbie- I love the idea of a forum, that is a great idea!

  155. NYGent says:

    LASB: you’re right, I don’t know an “LASD.” Chalk it up to transgender blogging.

  156. NYGent says:

    LASB: nothing wrong with “chatter” per se. I just look to see if it’s interesting. Yours almost always is. I just have never found interesting twitteresque discussions about, e.g. what one is cooking for lunch, and I’ve been taken to task for saying so. But that’s my problem, if I don’t like it I can always just skip over it. So as TexaSd says chat freely!

  157. TexaSD says:

    Sugarbarbie-Were you thinking about more than one SD?

  158. LASB says:

    NYGent – I’m guessing that was for me and not LASD. (?) I’m still looking for an LASD haha. Anyhow, I’m up in that area beginning March 7th. I’m looking forward to hitting up Tahoe.

  159. TexaSD says:

    Lol I just noticed it Yaz lol,

  160. Yaz says:

    TexasSD~ The pic at the top of the page. It has been bugging me since day 1…lol

  161. sugarbarbie says:

    NYGent that’s what I was saying about being honest and discussing it when you talk about the arrangement. I guess I didn’t say it clearly

  162. TexaSD says:

    Yaz- Goodnight, have a good one… Kinda curious about the weirdly shaped human heart thing your talking about…

  163. LASB says:

    Oh yeah, and just to add, I try not to judge people. I mean, who are we to judge what people do, or how many SBs or SDs they have when a large percentage of people in the sugar bowl are married and not telling their spouses. I’m not bashing anyone for doing that either, as I don’t know what’s under the tip of the iceberg for other people’s situations, histories, etc. I just try to stay clear of judgment and understand that just because it’s not for me, it’s ok if someone else wants to do things that way.

    I like that we have a place to express ourselves and get feedback and I’m not expecting everyone to like me. Sometimes I post to get answers, sometimes it’s to chat, and sometimes it’s to help someone. Really, I try to be respectful and not get run of the blog for being a b**** or overly irrelevant. I think it’s fine how the blog self governs, but it’s unlikely that I will ever step in to put people in their places. I’ll leave that to other bloggers. haha.

  164. NYGent says:

    LASD: you have a good attitude. certainly if all parties are in agreement there should be no problem and if they say cool with having multiples, nothing wrong with that.

    Have fun at your LA meet! I will be in San Fran (or just north thereof) for several days over same time period, hoping for some sun thru the winter rain.

  165. Yaz says:

    I am going to bed. I cant keep looking at that weirdly shaped human heart every time I try to refresh the page lol.

    Sleep tight gang..

  166. sugarbarbie says:

    I was wondering the other day why there isn’t a forum since obviously there is a demand.

  167. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Well I don’t mind the chatting, you never know if the thing your chatting about becomes the next topic lol. So chat freely woman lol

  168. sugarbarbie says:

    Hey opinions are like what? Whatever, now I know a little what to expect out of some of the bloggers and I will not be so shocked next time. Tact however is a very attractive quality.

  169. LASB says:

    I’d be all for a separate forum. I’m guilty of being overly chatting on here. I try to take it off the blog if when it gets really excessive. (Though I realize that my threshold is probably higher than others.) So yeah, I’ll work on sticking to the topics more.

    I also say that if people want to have more than one SD and all parties are in agreement, then it shouldn’t be a problem. Various pots have told me that they were cool with me having two or more if I wanted. Personally I imagine the easiest is to be in a situation where I don’t need/long for more than one, but I’m also open to what may present itself.

  170. TexaSD says:

    On a brighter note, My trip to Singapore is coming up soon, Kinda excited, its been years since i been there, I had to live thru NapaSB when she went not so long ago lol.

  171. TexaSD says:

    Sugarbarbie-Well sad to same, sometimes our opinions offend people… but i know what you mean, I don’t know anyone who will admit that they like drama. However with that being said, i don’t think the mood here is as bad as its been, and this is a learning exp for those who want it ;). So its kinda like getting advice, just the more in your face kind lol.

  172. ElegantSugar says:

    *My message was to Yaz*

  173. ElegantSugar says:

    Oh, I see. Yes, I have heard this. I have quickly become friends offline with some of the older bloggers and yes, there has been a decline in their desire to post. I was a lurker for a bit before becoming active and I do have to agree the value in the content has declined considerably. I certainly only ever want to be a value-add so I will do my best to correct my errors and help with improving this place.

  174. sugarbarbie says:

    TexasSD I don’t like drama. i try to avoid it. It takes a lot to make me upset at which point it’s best if nobody is around. But I’m more disappointed with this behavior here… The tone shifted from adults offering their difference in opinions to an onslaught of ridicule

  175. NYGent says:

    CdGent: I do remember the Paul Rudd film but I didn’t see it, though heard it was hilarious. I’m not TOTALLY oblivious to modern culture, I saw a couple of the Judd Apatow and Owen Wilson films (but I’ve only seen a couple reality shows, ever)

  176. Yaz says:

    I know you are trying to help Elegant but I meant the drama, people using fake names to post and pick fights, name calling……The blog was never like that before :-(

    A lot of people have stopped posting on here because of that….

  177. TexaSD says:

    SugarBarbie- Well Hopefully you won’t get into any drama, and maybe getting it out here in the blog is better than your sugar relationship. I dunno, but I have noticed some people really take it to heart, which is kind of sad. I not sure what advice to give about that. Again, Hopefully it will miss you completely lol… and if not, I am curious to know if your feisty or timid lol….

  178. ElegantSugar says:

    Sorry, Yaz. I’m a problem-solver and I was trying to offer something that might eliminate some of the points Flo addressed this evening. The blog doesn’t have to go away or change. Maybe just adding a forum for random topics so the comments on the blog post stay on topic with the specific blog post.

  179. Yaz says:

    It already isnt what it used to be anyways……

  180. Yaz says:

    If we change the blog layout, then it wont be what it used to be….. :-(

  181. sugarbarbie says:

    and here I thought sugar world was about no drama…maybe some of you are going through sugar withdrawal and need to re-up because you’re not acting too sweet.

  182. CdnGent says:

    NYGent … oh dear, that’s both a current pop culture reference and a nod to us old guys. Rush is a band (Canadian at that) and they appeared in a movie last year called I Love You, Man about a guy who tries to find a workable ‘bromance’ before getting married. Sorry, I didn’t think that would go over many heads.

    The point of the post was … “You da man!”

    Your previous post was as well executed a blog post as i’ve ever seen. Lovely!

  183. This is Elegant …just posting this as a link to the “example” forum should the Blog Gods see this. (Since I changed my name back to link to my blog.)

    Blog Gods – Would it be possible to incorporate a forum such as this one to keep things a little more organized and easier to follow?

    My apologies if doing this is a no-no. Just trying to offer something for the betterment of visitors to this blog – old & new.

  184. NYGent says:

    CdGent: what is “rush”? (displaying ignorance of modern culture here)

    sugarbarbie: no, there has been much worse in the past, tonite is nothing compared to some of the old battles . . .

  185. TexaSD says:

    Sugarbarbie- lol, nope, there has been several times, there is some strong feelings people have about certain issues, and sometimes no one backs down… that and sometimes I have noticed, people just react without even reading everything the person said. Its happened to me a few times too…

  186. CdnGent says:

    Sugarbarbie … I don’t see this is negative discussion. I see it as a group of stakeholders self-regulating and evolving. It’s a necessary process and a good exercise even if some noses are bent our of shape though it.

  187. sugarbarbie says:

    Is this the first time this place turned negative like this or have i always just missed it?

  188. ElegantSugar says:

    Well stated, NYGent. .”braggadocio…” I love it.

  189. Yaz says:

    NYGent~ You are the man!

    By the way, I was in NYC today. 😉 We definitely have to meet next time I am there and catch up!!! :-)

  190. Yaz says:

    Oh and I see NYCSB is on the master cleanse diet.

    I tried that a few months ago and gave up two days later. lol. I just got sick of drinking lemonade all day long and the salt water flush that you have to do at the end of the day?? bleeeeeeh lol

    I hope it works for you girl. Keep us posted! :-)

  191. CdnGent says:

    NYGent … I LOVE YOU, MAN!

    Wanna go see Rush?

  192. ElegantSugar says:

    FL SD – glad to see you here! Yes, please be patient and stay active with us!

    Midwest – the new forum (if ever there is one), should have a “corner” for Blog Addicts. Good night!

  193. NYGent says:

    Midwest: I second your ideas, they are good ones.

    CdGent: I would hate for the blog to turn into a James Thurberesque war of the sexes (a la the old New Yorker cartoons — showing my age here). But I do agree there are at times a double standard. If an SD came on here and said “I’d really like an SB for mornings Monday-Wednesday, and another for evenings Thursday-Friday,” and another travel SB for the weekends the other two aren’t available, and btw can the SD bloggers help me out with ‘cover stories’ as to how to keep each of them from knowing about each other” — well, I can just imagine the hue and cry to the rafters (justifiably) we would hear from the SBs on this blog. I do not think SBs or SDs should be precluded from multiples, and I sort of get the “don’t ask don’t tell” policy (though I suspect that the reason people “don’t tell” is because, deep down, they know the other party would be hurt/disappointed/object if they knew). What I, just personally, find somewhat off-putting is the braggadocio of “I’ve got multiple SDs (or SBs) and aren’t I so clever at leveraging them off against each other and keeping them all in the dark.” Admittedly, maybe the rest of us, are just jealous that we’re not ourselves able to pull that off (“Chastity,” said the Roman poet, Ovid, “is lack of opportunity.”) I guess everyone has to be comfortable with their attitude/treatment of others and we should judge not lest we be judged. I’m just giving a “personal” reaction which can be disregarded at will.

  194. ElegantSugar says:

    Cdn – I have thought this since I became active with this blog a month ago. I think most of us are probably more familiar with this type of forum. With stickies and the option to post specific topics whether it be health & beauty, sex, fashion, dating tips, etc.

  195. Yaz says:

    I personally am not into juggling multiple SDs. I have too much going in my personal life with work, friends and family AND making time for my SD to even think about looking for another one.

    My 2 cents…

  196. Midwest says:

    TexasSD – She became DDD for a while when she and Naughty Molly had to put SDs in the dungeon, but she hasn’t been around for a few months. She will sense you beckoning her and make an appearance.

    Bah…I’m Midwest…and I’m really going to sleep. Big day tomorrow.

  197. CdnGent says:

    Elegant … YES! That’s exactly the type of forum this blog needs. The problem with this approach is that it doesn’t stay topic specfic very long and ultimately ends up meandering into stream of consciousness. That, for some among us, is dangerous stuff. LOL!

    The good thing about your peferred forum is that it would allow for the continuation of specific issues/topics/etc. There could also be stickies so that newbies can get a primer of information. In other words, there could be a post that features all the acronyms in the SD/SB world. Or, one that lists different profile ideas. Mostly, the best part of that type of forum is the control the users have over the topics.

    Discussion on something could go stale for weeks but all it would take is a single post to bring it back to the top of the pile. That way, the discussion is ongoing and dymaic and doesn’t get too far removed from the initial spirit of the intention of the thread.

    I’m all for it!

  198. FL-SD says:

    Hi all. This is my first time posting here. I’m one of those that has lurked for some time. Let me say that the blog has been an incredible help in understanding how to manage the SD/SB experience. I think the blog has helped me learn how to be a better SD.

    I also took note of the “manage multiple SDs” comments. It was something that caught my attention and served as a wakeup to always be alert. I think the sugar world is filled with a cross section of folks… some with less honor than others.

    Thanks for all the education and support that I’ve gleaned from this blog. I hope to be able to contribute frequently.

  199. Midwest says:

    Elegant – That does look nice and a bit easier to find what you are looking for .. as a newbie, I would find it very helpful.

    Goodnight…Really!

  200. TexaSD says:

    Midwest- Lol, well have a goodnight, whatever happened to Just Dee? been awhile since i have seen her

  201. ElegantSugar says:

    I just changed my name to link to the type of forum that I feel would be a great format. This is a free service and it literally took me 5 minutes to set up. It would be great for the Blog Gods to incorporate something like this.

    This isn’t a real workable forum and just something I created quickly as an example. (if you guys want to check it out, click on my name)

  202. sugarbarbie says:

    when you talk about an arrangement you decide if it’s exclusive. It’s kinda rude to look down on a couple that decide they want to see others. I was just saying that I have not witnessed the way it was said. Everytime the subject of having more than one the response that I witnessed was that this was something to be honest with your potsd about…unless I missed some threads.

  203. Midwest says:

    Cdn- Well said and thank you for keeping it general. It’s good to hear from the men how they feel about different ideologies of sugar dating.

    No blogging???? I’m out! I’m Midwest and I’m addicted to the blog. You will find ES and I in a corner rocking back and forth in a fetal position if we must stay away from the blog. :0

    Goodnight sugars…this is a healthy forum, so take these povs as constructive criticism. There is still much love! Stay sweet.

  204. TexaSD says:

    Cdn. if you don’t want to cite a specific example, I could lol…

    Ditto Cdn… its kinda amazing,,, sometimes to me.

  205. sugarbarbie says:

    that’s what I meant about being honest

  206. TexaSD says:

    SugarBarbie- I wanna chime in to that also, I want only one SB and If i find out she is seeing people behind me, I will just leave, dishonesty isn’t worth my time…

  207. CdnGent says:

    Hey ladies … if you want my $0.02 I’ll tell you that I used to check into the blog from time to time but never posted because it seemed really catty and pointless. Someone convinced me that there were some good people here and after having spent a week or so now, I concur that there is.

    That said, the double standards displayed here are DISGUSTING. It’s the classic illustration of the man who murders his kids and wife and we all call him a monster. A week later when we hear of the woman who drowns her kids in a car, we shake our heads and wonder what the poor woman must have suffered from. The genders have to do a better job of understaning each other.

    Blogs are great for commisery I believe. However, birds of a feather sticking together can be somewhat problematic if the idea is to get a BALANCED perspective. I love having some beers with my recently divorced brother in law and his friends because, well … they’re all guys and they protect each other big time. BUT, they don’t actually resolve anything because there’s not balance to the conversation. Having been raised the only male between two sisters, I tend to have a pretty good handle on my feminine side. I think I often provide a perspective other guys can only wonder about.

    So what does this all mean? I think that Flo is onto something here.

    And for the record, if I got into a relationship with a blog SB, I’d only have ONE rule (and I don’t have rules). What would it be? NO blogging while we’re in our relationship. There’s as much damage being done here as good, that’s pretty clear.

    Oh and yeah … the support of SB’s looking to secretly juggle multiple SDs? Ick! Perhaps there should be a contract signed? LOL!

    Anyway, I enjoy posting and participating here but honestly, sometimes it feels like some of you really don’t have much respect for men at all. How, then could you possibly expect an arrangement to work for any length of time? Just curious. And no, I’m not citing any specific examples. I’m WAY too smart for that. Haha!

  208. Midwest says:

    Since we’re sharing what our wish list for the blog, I have a few items:
    1- A chat component (like facebook) so some conversations can be taken offline
    2- A search component or archives according to subject.

    As for the site, I think popularity has been both a positive and a negative. The site wants more women, so more men join and pay the fee. Is there some balance where true sbs can have different profile distinctions from the escorts? The escorts do not try to hide their intent, so why not just give sds different pools to choose from?

    My $0.02

  209. Flo Rida says:

    Sugarbarbie – yes some SDs do not care but there is a principle in law which is informed consent and I daresay if a SB says do you mind if I have a boyfriend or have other SDs many would object. Finally it’s one thing knowing that it happens another to have it so in your face. Again this is just my pov and I may be wrong.

  210. cleo says:

    all i love my profile too… but i get basically zero attention so…

  211. NYGent says:

    BellaNYC: I happen to love the “actress” occupation when I see it. I used to say on my profile that it was a big plus if the SB lists her occupation as being in the performing arts. I deleted it only because some SBs viewed it, incorrectly, as a requirement of mine as opposed to an interest on my part. I wrote a biography of an old movie actress (0nly a couple bloggers know who, it would give my identity away), and I’ve always been fascinated with the acting personality and the acting tactic (Stanislovski “Method,” Stella Adler, Lee Strasberg, vs. old style “character” actors). I am a TERRIBLE actor, can’t lie or pretend convincingly at anything, would be a terrible salesman, etc., yet (or maybe why) I admire those who can “pretend.” So to me the “actress” listing is a plus, even more so if the SB elaborates a bit in her profile (e.g., Broadway vs. TV vs. film, modern vs. shakespeare, etc.).

    Now i will catch flak for this but to me, the bigger red flag in listing occupation is “self employed” where there is zero elaboration in the profile as to what that means and the photos are otherwise suggestive of escort. As I say, the “escort” red flag is really based on an accumulation of factors, no single thing, and you sort of know it when you see it.

  212. ElegantSugar says:

    sugarbarbie – Honesty is what is great about this blog. I think what Flo is saying though (donning my kevlar from Flo) is that recently there has been so much talk about “how to juggle SDs” without regard to the real human emotions that are tied in with dealing with an ACTUAL person. Some comments I have read here have appalled me, but I chose to bite my tongue. These heartless comments somewhat dilute the foundation of a sugar relationship and make them seem less meaningful. Just my two cents…

  213. Flo Rida says:

    Elegant and Midwest – thanks for not hating on me

    QUESTION TO: Stephan and ‘The Founde aka The Man in the Sky’

    Maybe if we ask really nicely the Blog Gods can create a forum where SBs only should participate and then SBs can chit chat away and forgive me talk about SDs in private SEPARATE from the main blog. The danger of this though is that anyone can post a fake profile and listen in if they were really devious BUT i’m not sure many would go to that trouble. Having said that the blog gods rarely listen to me, but if enough people supported it I think it would be a really good idea. Finally if we want SD participation we have to tilt the conversation a tad.

  214. sugarbarbie says:

    Some SD’s don’t care if you have multi SD’s. I haven’t been here long but I have gotten the impression that the tone here is too be honest.

  215. ElegantSugar says:

    Flo – I have definitely been guilty of adding to some of the idle chit chat and yes, it is because one of my jobs involve me sitting at my desk all day and the blog is a break. Personally, I have tried to temper this, but have a hard time not jumping in if a topic is of interest to me. I can easily adjust to not doing this if it increases the value of the blog.

    I am in complete agreement with you on the negative talk about how to “juggle SDs”. It is a bitter pill to swallow for SDs to read, I’m sure. I’m certainly not an advocate of it. I have received messages on this very topic via my blog from SDs and SBs both. Most have said this is why they only lurk and don’t join in.

  216. JSO-TXSD says:

    take care i am out

  217. Midwest says:

    Flo Rida – well said.

    Elegant – thanks for the advice!

  218. Midwest says:

    JSO – You rock..excellent advice. My iron is fine…just gave blood. My cholesterol is down too … yeah! Trust me, nobody would mistaken you for homo/metro :)

  219. ElegantSugar says:

    Midwest – taking a multivitamin (or even prenatal vitamins) will help strengthen your nails as you heal them from their damage. Use cuticle oil and ridge fillers are also great to use under the base coat. Dark colors actually look great on short nails and give them more of a sultry look. Match your toenails. If you are more of a clear/natural girl, just make sure they are buffed (nail buffers can be bought anywhere – pharmacy, Target, etc) and keep a clear polish on them at all times. Hope that helps.

  220. Flo Rida says:

    DANGER DANGER WILL ROBINSON

    Someone made a great comment to me which you’all may reject but the blog has become way too conversational. i’m sorry but this has got to drive SD interest and participation down.

    Also i’m going to get flak from this but I have my Kevlar, BUT there’s been too much ‘how do I juggle multiple SDs and maximize $ without getting caught’ and SBs are saying ‘good for you’.

    I’m assumng that if a SD in one of these arrangements knew about this he would NOT be happy.

    Also can you imagine the heat a SD would take coming on here and saying ‘how can I juggle multiple SBs, get lots of s-x and not let them know’.

    Yes double standards apply but i’m not in favor of this one.

    On the chit chat, I think it’s because SBs have more time and are also more conversational – the downside of this as maybe AustinSD said ‘ how do you keep up with this’

    At the end of the day as Nero said ‘Rome is the mob’ and you’all will decide what happens to the blog but I would advocate having a bit more balance.

    Ok hate away, but I felt I had to express a pov. i’m not saying i’m right but it’s not a coincidence that many of the old bloggers are less involved (but maybe that’s a good thing).
    Views? Remember I have Kevlar.

  221. sugarbarbie says:

    i think i fixed my link…is it right now?

  222. DC says:

    Cleo’s link works spectacularly though.. she’s magical, obvi. =)

  223. DC says:

    Cdn, because the manner in which they post the link is pretty much only viewable by themselves and not accessible for everyone else (unless they figure out how to do it).
    Instead, the hard way to do it would be – copy her PROFILE NUMB & login into SA, click on another girl’s link on the homepage, paste her prof numb into that girl’s profile number, and voila.
    Simple, just sounds complex.

  224. JSO-TXSD says:

    last gay homo statement i will make tonight

  225. DC says:

    Barbie, half of your profile repeats itself. That’s what I’ve noticed so far. More to come.

  226. JSO-TXSD says:

    Midwest – you well only do more damage to your nails covering them up. go to doctor and get pre-natel(sp) vitiames. they will grow and get strong in a heartbeat. Also check your iron level.

  227. JSO-TXSD says:

    I might not be smart. I might not be rich. I am single(cannot find a girl to date me?). I look at the pic first. Then I read. Will read everything. I do not care how long it is. I am looking for – are you into you, are you into pleasing your future man, are do you want to save the world. Most are nuymber one. The rest I look at. But i am not the smartest tool in the shed; and I should not be on here for being single.

  228. Midwest says:

    Evening sugars! It took 2 hours to catch up … sheesh!

    NYCBella – A gent would have NO doubt you were a genuine actress…beautiful and talented. There is no way you could be mistaken for anything else.

    Sugarbarbie- sorry SD didn’t come through. Always keep your options open until he’s made it official. I know it lacks the romance, but it is a reality.

    Fashion help please – I used the gel nails for a while and my nails became terribly thin. They are in rehab and I would love some suggestions on wearing short nails and having them look nice. They are not as healthy and shapely as they were before gels. HELP!!

  229. CdnGent says:

    How come when I click on some of the profiles, they show profile not available? Weird!

  230. sugarbarbie says:

    Ok, kind of anxious about feedback so going to grab some wine and brb

  231. CA Dreamin SB says:

    Checking in – making sure we’re all behaving!

    CDN – yes please, off the blog

  232. sugarbarbie says:

    hmmmm how do i make my name clickable…does it look clickable to you?

  233. sugarbarbie says:

    ok I’m gonna take the plunge and update my blog profile with my SA profile as the link. I wish I did this before I pulled down 2 of my pics. Please give me feedback. ok give me a sec to figure this out

  234. CdnGent says:

    Oh … and you’re allowed to make typos in a blog. In a profile, you’re not. LOL! I don’t double check for accuracy when i’m here. So don’t call me hypocritical. Completely different forum.

  235. CdnGent says:

    To my mind, all profiles have to have a minimal amount of RELEVANT information. Mostly I want to see that an SB can put together a paragraph or three, use proper spelling, grammar and sentence structure and express herself succinctly and eloquently.

    A wordy profile can be wonderful if well presented. Likewise, a minimal approach can be appealing if the SB as crystalized her words and made a sincere pitch. What is never appealing is NO information or a point form approach to listing your fantastic qualities.

    Let’s get one thing straight … none of you have to TELL me you have a ‘great sense of humour’ or that you ‘like to laugh’ or that you’re ‘intelligent’ or that you’re ‘well read’ or that you are ‘passionate and loyal.’ Tell me a story, open yourself up and ALL of that will reveal itself. Plus you’ll separate yourself from the masses.

    Do NOT use quirky online short forms like ‘i wud B gud 4 u’. GOOD GAWD that’s so unappealing. Nothing says 18-years-old and stupid more clearly than that. As someone who studied English, I know language evolves. But geezus, there is a limit to how illiterate we have to sound whether we have 148 characters to work with or an unlimited numuber.

    Check, double and triple check for spelling mistakes. Make NO mention of money in your profile (that’s what the expectations field is for) and try to figure out a way to explain how you can complement ME as opposed to piling on all the superlatives about YOU.

    I could go on, but I’m rambling. And even though I know that you’re all still reading because none of you are lazy (or busy), i’ll end it there for now. Oh, and CA … I assume you want my comments off the blog?

    Cdn

  236. cleo says:

    texasd that isn’t what i mean

    i watched a LOT of cracks about escorts fly by the blogs before i went on a rant about it. i’m guessing that bella saw a lot of ‘actresses are escorts’ comments before she lost it.

    so i’m just saying that it’s probably the straw that broke the camel’s back

  237. sugarbarbie says:

    that was to LASB *up there*

  238. ESB says:

    OK, I’m off to dream land.. I hope.

    Night everyone.. Lisa, you crack me up! Love your sence of humor (if you’ll fit in the new place). I hope you find (found) out about the appartment and it’s good news. Good luck! I agree, a teenager needs her own bathroom. In our last place, my son shared mine with me. It was easier than having to sort through all her mess. He said it was “too girly” for him. He’s a hoot! but he used my expensive (Biolage) shampoo!! grrr… at least he left my razors alone :)

    Night everyone!! HUGS!!

  239. ElegantSugar says:

    DC – I told cleo the same exact thing awhile ago.

  240. sugarbarbie says:

    haha yeah that is so backwards

  241. DC says:

    Cdn, I agree w/ Flo & CA – my SD could barely write a 2 word profile of his own, let alone sift through 20+ profiles containing 250 word mini essays. He’s just too busy.
    I do think there are some SDs, such as yourself, who do enjoy the longer profiles as it really dives into a woman’s character and personality.. you all might be an exception to the rule. Plus you’re a blogger now, so you definitely know you’re an exception to the rule =)

  242. LASB says:

    SD4Me is odd in that I get tons of emails from guys who won’t pay for their profile, yet claim to make 500k-1mil/year. Yeah, right.

  243. ElegantSugar says:

    Flo – no guy in the Congo ill, but a doctor in Haiti, which I saw some other bloggers mentioning earlier (NYC SB, I think…). I thought that was a coincidence too…

  244. DC says:

    Oh I want some sweet tea vodka now. I agree.. taste like pure happiness!

    Honestly, I really like Cleo’s profile as is.. everything in it. I can’t really imagine what to change, possibly keep rotating new pics to keep the profile fresh and new?

  245. LASB says:

    Yeah, yeah. sorry. I meant busy. not lazy.

  246. Flo Rida says:

    CdnGent – some rich men are very lazy, especially the one’s who inherited the money and are rich playboys, also some rich men are very busy, or are looking at several profiles and so may not remember a small detail BUT I agree that if a SD is into a SB he’ll remember ‘stuff’

    cleo – hi!

    all – has anyone else got a curious email from a guy who is in the Congo ill? Two of my blog friends have got this and it’s got to be more than a coincidence?

  247. ESB says:

    Cdn: I hope you didn’t feel insulted in that. I was told that in an earlier blog as well.. to keep it short. Not ALL but most guys aren’t into reading. It’s like a resume. If it doesn’t grab their attention in 5 seconds, you’ve lost the chance at an interview.

    Ladies: I like my drinks on the sweet side. I’ve also been told that is dangersous because those (sweet drinks) can cause the worst hangover. I only drink to get drunk when I am with a trusted friend who will drive me home, put me to bed, and be there to hold my head in the morning…only a true friend would do that for you. Never on a date. Woudl so ruin the moment, ya know?

  248. Okay kids…I must depart. However, the bar is open. Will the last person out please lock the door?

    Thanks!
    Luv you guys!

  249. DC – You rock! Sweet Tea Vodka *virtual high-5*

  250. ElegantSugar says:

    CA Dreamin & DC – I discovered Sweet Tea Vodka and Lemonade (Arnold Palmer Extraordinaire) while in Chicago. Wow. DEE-LISH.

  251. Now CDN – Don’t get your feathers all ruffled! It’s an opinion! Maybe the profile was overly verbose! Benefit of the doubt hmm? :)

    My thought on that topic is that very affluent men don’t tend to want to waste a lot of time wading through a dissertation of a profile. Mine, yes, I think it’s a little wordy – but you’re supposed to be looking at that for me :) Click on my name and it will take you to it!

  252. DC says:

    Cdn great tip – Elegant mentioned that a few blogs back, she does the same. =)

  253. DC says:

    Oh yes, I can vouch for ESB and VA both liking Amaretto sours.. I might have to check them out next time I go out for drinks.
    Sweet Tea Vodka is freaking SPECTACULAR. That + Lemonade. My GOD.

  254. CdnGent says:

    LASB – “I’d say shorten the copy by at least 1/2. Men are lazy and they want the nitty gritty handed on a platter and spoon fed to them. They don’t want to have to read too much.”

    REALLY????

    I know a lot of very affluent guys. Laziness is NOT a trait inherent in any of them. I’d say that if you’re finding “lazy” guys not reading your profile, you’re likely finding a fake. Perhaps there’s some good advice for you SBs. Put some small unique detail in your profile somewhere that someone would only have noted had they READ the whole thing. If they can’t answer your one-question quiz, they’re likely not the sharp fellow you’re hoping to meet.

    I’d write more but, meh … i’m getting lazy

  255. DC says:

    ESB no worries. I think I might cave and make him take me to dinner beforehand (my metabolism is way too fast).
    If everything goes well though I’ll give you a giant hug (and we’ll plan a mini celebration you + VA + me)! You’ll have had a tremendously long day, I don’t want to hold you up.. you’ll be exhausted.
    No worries.

  256. ESB- too funny! I was just about to write that I love White Russians and Amaretto Sours! It isn’t that I can’t shoot whiskey / tequila with the best of them…I just *choose* not to. With that said, Sweet Tea Vodka is my favorite right now :)

  257. Lisa says:

    ESB everyone has to have their own bathroom. It’s like underwear, you need your own bathroom. When I was married, I had my own bathroom, when I lived with my family , I had my own bathroom, no one wants to share a bathroom

  258. DC says:

    ESB mail back!

  259. ESB says:

    That will be fun DC. Getting to spend some time with you and him. I can’t stay out to late though, gotta get BG and get her to bed. She is already designing her new bedroom and decorating her bathroom… she’s so funny. Our HOUSE (not apartment) has to have 2 bathrooms… teenagers…

    CA: make mine an Ammeretto Sour.

  260. DC says:

    CA oh I could NOT agree more. White Russians, delish. & If I’m feeling extra frisky I just skip the White for a Black Russian.

  261. DC says:

    K I’ll check now.

  262. DC – love white russians!!!

  263. DC says:

    ESB if everything works out I will be cheersing to you at dinner tomorrow night w/ DC SD. =)

  264. ESB says:

    DC you have mail

  265. ESB says:

    OH, for those of you who remember… I FINALLY told XBF to leave me alone. I have better things to do with my time than entertain him and his fantasies of us getting back to gether. He was exhausting me!! It’s finally over because *I* said so!

  266. DC says:

    Weird, Elegant I wrote you and it did not want to post my comment. Essentially I said I agree with you (as usual) =)

    CA have a drink for me please (White Russian). yumm

    ESB! <3

  267. ESB says:

    CA I’ll take a drink. Long day, not over, and I KNOW I won’t be sleeping again tonight… nervous/excited/ happy… tomorrow night I may be drinking even more if everything works out right!!

  268. TexaSD says:

    Allright, I going out to meet some people. see you ladies later, have a nice night to those I will miss

  269. TexaSD says:

    DC- Exactly, if there is a lot of chemistry, I can move on money. So I guess it all depends on how he feels about you NewbieSB, or how you approach being with him… I dunno something like that.

  270. Thank you DC!!! The bar is open :)

  271. DC says:

    CA I’ll join for happy hour! =)

  272. ElegantSugar says:

    So true, DC. Allowance is one thing, but once you factor in costs for travel, gifts, dinners, etc, that set amount the SD has listed as his budget can double or even triple. And usually it has only to do with the fact, the chemistry and mutual feelings are there and he WANTS to spend the extra, not because the SB asked for it. So many factors and formulas really.

  273. TexaSD says:

    CA Dreamin- Ok, lol

    NYC Bella- Ditto what cleo said

  274. DC says:

    Then again, he was also only expecting (originally) to see the girl once a week, so 1K – 1.2K a meet he felt was fair.

  275. DC says:

    TXSD, I think that sounds about right. My SD listed an allowance number (3-5K), and spent twice that amount on just my Vday gift alone, not including the entire weekend (traveling, hotel, dinner, shopping) or the allowance he gave me. Pretty much for the same reason you listed, chemistry. =)

  276. Anyone want to join me for happy hour?

  277. cleo says:

    hey flo rida

    hope you’re awesome bella!

  278. TexaSD – shhhh! ix-nay on the opic-tay!

  279. TexaSD says:

    CA Dreamin- Oh I am not trying to get into it.

    Cleo- I dunno, if thats is his exp, or anyone’s exp, how do you get upset with that person? If it is an opinion without exp, or without thinking, or just really without any evidence, I can understand. ehh, oh well

  280. Flo Rida says:

    NewbieSB – it’s supply and demand through a private negotiated transaction – although a SD or SB may have ‘comps’ from previous arrangements and the cost of living provides cost base there is no set formula. I would venture it’s a normal distribution with fat tails (leptokertic to the people who study option pricing – NYC SB)

    ciao everyone been really busy today and missed some drama – damn I love, sorry missed a good fight!

  281. Newbie – I think there was a discussion a few blogs back about the amount of allowance being tied to geographic location. In the cities where it’s more expensive to live, you may see SB’s asking for more (NYC, LA, SF, Miami) and in smaller cities or less expensive cities, they probably would ask for less. Kindof hard to justify $5000 a month when you’re living in Sanford, NC – and NO, I’m not insulting Sanford -it’s just a REALLY inexpensive town to live in. But it is completely up to you what you want to ask for. No one sets the rules on that.

  282. DC says:

    Newbie – I think it depends. I don’t think it necessarily is any one factor. I think a big indicator is location though.. if you’re in a small town somewhere in Idaho, I doubt 20K+ for an SB is realistic. Major cities like LA, NYC, Miami.. tend to have more wealth, so that number is more realistic..

  283. ElegantSugar says:

    Newbie – I feel it’s a combination of things and also differs for each SB/SD situation. Example: if a SB is requesting $x allowance per month and has outlined to her SD the amount will be going towards x, x and x and he feels he wants to help her out in all those areas and has the means, he will agree to it.

  284. TexaSD says:

    NewbieSB- Lol, Ya, I have seen plenty of expensive woman, and I have had some expensive woman contact me, I don’t know why ask for that amount, I am not looking for a expensive SB, my price range is usually 1-3k but if the woman is perfection (as I see it, of course lol) then I can go a little higher, up to maybe 5k… I don’t know how other SDs do it, or figure it out, but for me, its what I want, what I can afford, and the SB herself… Umm not sure if that answers your question…

  285. cleo says:

    TexaSd i think it was one of those final straw things…

  286. Ya – best to let that topic be TexaSD :)

  287. NewbieSB says:

    sort of random and off-topic but would you say theres an age limit to being a sugarbaby? as in, at what age would you say the offers stop rolling in (if you are for example still in great shape and look good)?

    also i have read some blogs where girls ask for anywhere between 1k to 15k+ as an allowance. what exactly makes someone worth “more”?

    while i am aware that some (young, slim, blonds lol) get 20+ messages per day when they initially join, i am wondering if that demand is what makes them more expensive?

    how is this price tag gauged? beauty? youth? typical hollywood looks? smarts? the amount of $$$ the SD has to throw around? the combo of all of these things?

  288. TexaSD says:

    Sweet. Well with the whole NYC Bella thing, All I will add to that conversation is, if that is from Cdn exp. don’t take offense to that, I don’t know why anyone takes offense to anyone’s exp… He didn’t say all actress/models are escorts… he was saying from his exp (as I understand it). Then again, I didn’t read the whole thing… So I dunno.

  289. of course! What kind of bad kitties would we be without ripped clothes???

    People…I need help 😛

  290. TexaSD says:

    Ok, turned on now, any clothes ripping?

  291. TexaSD says:

    Correction, a disagreement between ladies?

  292. TexaSD says:

    I think I missed a cat fight?

  293. sugarbarbie says:

    haha at the garlic…

  294. Jade says:

    It is kinda sad that some guys on sd websites think they can get intimate right away the first date. I keep running into this for some reason right now. * cry * I always thought no means no…..sometimes I want to karate chop em for trying to manhandle me !

  295. LASB says:

    Pot #2 said he can’t make it out tonight. I’m relieved. I’ve been eating garlic all day. I hadn’t thought of that when I invited him. Phew. Dodged that bullet.

  296. Lisa says:

    I did lie on my rental application though. I put that I weighed 103 when I actually weigh 105. I can’t believe they make you put down your height and weight on an apartment application. Since i’m renting the smallest apartment they have available, I guess they want to make sure I fit into it.

  297. vima says:

    elegant: thanks!
    CA Dreamin: yes, It’s monday :(

  298. LASB says:

    I’m detoxing and it’s kicking my butt!!!

    Yes, seems awfully quiet here.

  299. Lisa says:

    I’m here still waiting to hear if I get my apartment. I was hoping to hear today so I could do something tomorrow but now I won’t be able to get anything done before friday as I have to work all day the next 3 days. If I had heard today, I would have asked to leave early from work tomorrow. I will be on pins and needles all day tomorrow as I can’t make any calls until lunch which is usually 1sh and it will be too late to ask to leave early and for sd to drive into town to meet me.

  300. I should be making something for dinner, but I have no idea what I want. Actually, I do know what I want…a sugar date…tonight…anyone? 😛

  301. ElegantSugar says:

    CA Dreamin – ha, ha. Yes, it is Monday. I am cooking, reading, writing, lurking.

  302. ElegantSugar says:

    Hi Vima – I just got your email and I’m responding now. :)

  303. Come on ladies! It’s MONDAY NIGHT…someone has to be around! Hello?

  304. vima says:

    elle: I send you a email on you blog 😉

  305. sugarbarbie says:

    hmm already says willing and free to travel and my schedule is flexible.

  306. ElegantSugar says:

    CA Dreamin – I agree. Or…”Okay with Long Distance and/or Travel”

  307. Sugarbarbie – I wouldn’t say “I’m willing to relocate” – that might be a little too much for some SD’s – I would say “I’m willing to travel”…what do you other SB’s think?

  308. sugarbarbie says:

    oh cool! i cleared my cache a thousand times but still see my whole face yea!

  309. cleo says:

    i only see nose/mouth

  310. sugarbarbie says:

    btw that’s me in the avatar I tried to crop it and erase it but for some reason gravatar is determied to keep my face plastered on here lol.

  311. sugarbarbie says:

    ok so since i can see who checks me out on sd4m i decided to contact some tha I liked but didn’t send me a message. I asked for feedback etc. They keep saying the same thing. They like my profile and my pictures I’m just too far. I’m starting to get tired of Virginia Beach. Maybe I should say willing to relocate i the first line.

  312. Lily says:

    I do seem to get what I want from some of the people, some of the time. I don’t have perfect success rates or anything, though!

  313. LASB says:

    Cleo – you have mail!

  314. sugarbarbie says:

    Mine is too much too. And due to recent let down my need have changed so here I go.

  315. cleo says:

    lasb: muhahahahaha

    deal *g*

  316. cleo says:

    LASB: to my mind it’s too long and gives too much away. basically i want to start from scratch but the from where is tough… :)

    and if you DID write it i would certainly rewrite it to make it sound like me…

    feel free to send notes or ideas or jottings to help the brainstorming

    :)

  317. LASB says:

    Cleo – I’ll email you off the blog and we can REALLY talk! 😉

  318. LASB says:

    Ok, I looked and if I write it, well then it’s not you coming through. It’ll be me. Also, I am sooooooo not the pro on getting into an arrangement, as I’ve yet to snag one. Maybe one of the experts here can help. Lily seems to be fairly successful in getting what she wants. I get almost no emails on SA. Maybe one a month. However, I don’t post a face pic, so I know that has a lot to do with it.

    Now that you’ve read my disclaimer, I’d say shorten the copy by at least 1/2. Men are lazy and they want the nitty gritty handed on a platter and spoon fed to them. They don’t want to have to read too much.

  319. cleo says:

    lasb: lily says it’s too ‘wife’ and not ‘sexy’ enough… others suggest that it’s not focused on what i can do for them enough… all true

    i have NO idea how to fix that.

    but i’m not making my new profile until i figure it out

  320. mommapoppins says:

    ok everyone, I am having to get off here for a while. I hope that you all have a great evening!!!

  321. LASB says:

    hmm… lemme take a look.

  322. cleo says:

    lasb i think i need you to rewrite my profile *g*

  323. LASB says:

    Cleo – Actually your point is similar to my point. I don’t make my profile “obvious” on the grand scale because then I am doing all the work, screening out the creeps. I just am who I am, portray myself as such, and those who are supposed to find me will do so. And actually, I thought that them finding me would mean they are doing more work, but from what they say, I just jumped off the page at them. BGpotSD was like “I have no idea why I wrote you. There was just something there.”

  324. cleo says:

    sugarbarbie: oh geeze i’m sorry i misunderstood. and i was really confused since irlsd is trying to stick it out this time

    anyway i think you just gently ask him what’s up?
    .
    LASB sorry let me rephrase

    the girl in the stripper shoes and the cleavage is obvious. she’s the friend you introduce to your boyfriends to see if they hit on your hot friends. she’s the girl at the bar all the men who like obvious thrwo themselves at

    you are more ‘work’ in the sense that they have to be open to seeing you or whatever. you aren’t obvious or simple. you’re like single malt scotch instead of rum.

    she’s the rum.

    you know sort of what i mean? like i don’t want to be the obvious easy girl even IF it means i might get some damn sex!

  325. LASB says:

    RANT BEGINS
    I’m having a catty moment right now with my project manager! GRRRRRRRR!!! I should have fired his @ss months ago. Idiot!
    RANT OVER

  326. CdnGent – Click on my ‘screen name’ :)

    Lily – you have mail.

  327. mommapoppins says:

    elle- I feel that our imperfect moments are part of who makes us who we are. That might be a bad thing, but then it might just be a great thing!!!

  328. DC says:

    Barbie, ohh okay. That’s what I thought given the fact we’ve been in email communication, but then I got all confused.

  329. DC SB says:

    I have catty moments all of the time, rawrrr!
    I’m no pushover.

  330. sugarbarbie says:

    no! my irl sd lol yikes

  331. NYC SB says:

    we all have commented on one of the premium or featured profiles… its no big deal really… we are only human after all

  332. DC SB says:

    Wait, the blog IRLSD made an offer to Barbie? I thought he had an SB..?

  333. LASB says:

    Cleo – Not sure I understood correctly. Actually, I find that the less effort I’m in, the more I get out of life. Again, goes back to the notion that I can just stand still and not have to be doing, doing, doing (can be read as obsessing, obsessing, obsessing.) It’s a different concept than our typical Western philosophies.

  334. ElegantSugar says:

    Lily – I have “catty” moments too, believe me. Like the time I had the outburst about the featured profiles of SDs. I admit, it was hugely rude and tacky on my part. We all have wildly imperfect human moments.

  335. cleo says:

    cdn gent: dunno, cops don’t like me they (and firemen) find me to be intimidatingly self sufficient. torontonians basically don’t find me attractive (this weight, xmas weight or summer weight – which is a pretty big difference) and as we know i’m not the whole package

    so personally? i don’t think my opinion is worth shit.

    but i can tell you that the vast majority of “real” seeming men i’ve emailed haven’t bothered to answer and the ones that contact me are 85% thinking that calling me ‘baby’ in initial approach is going to work on me.
    .
    LASB a huge percentage of people prefer the blindingly obvious to working for it. you don’t want to be that kind of obvious so you have to work harder is all.

    it’s like i asked my teacher once why her studio didn’t have more students since her pilates was clearly superior and she looked at me like it was the easiest answer ever and said “most people don’t like to work”
    .
    sugarbarbie: i’m sorry hon… that does seem to be his way if you look at his tales though

  336. LASB says:

    Lily – Oh, I’ve never done it. Just been tempted to. It’s more work than I think I need to put into this. Stuff often finds me when I realize I can just stand still.

  337. ElegantSugar says:

    OC or Stephan – please do the right thing and remove Lily’s post of those other women. Thanks.

  338. sugarbarbie says:

    yes IRLSD made me an offer on thurs and backed out today with a lame excuse.

  339. Lily says:

    and……. LASB, what was the findings of your undercover market researc h on SA gents?

  340. Lily says:

    sugarbarbie, was it your monthly allowance that he fell short on providing on the agreed upon date, or… something else? You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to. I’m sorry you are feeling frustrated. I hope things resolve themselves and happily so.

  341. cleo says:

    sugarbarbie i’m certainly wasting my time with this, which is why i’m looking in other towns and otherwise not looking

    i don’t know what you look like or where you live or what you’re like so i can’t comment

    that said, all sorts of ‘unexpected’ sb’s have sd’s now so you know, just when you give up …?

  342. LASB says:

    I look at those too and think, “Am I really less desirable than those women? Oh well.” I actually thought about testing out a few fake profiles to see what is really going on here. That’s just my nerdiness and market research background taunting me, though. Really, I believe that whoever is meant to find me will, regardless of the method, place, etc.

  343. CdnGent says:

    Cleo … YES!!!

    That’s it EXACTLY! That small percentage issue. So, when you CONSTANTLY see profiles like that, you start to make quick determinations based on experience. Is it fair? No. Is it understandable? Yes! It’s like a female colleague of mine who has JUST come out of her second relationship with a cop. Cops make NOTORIOUSLY bad boyfriends but she got bit twice. I’m guessing that the next time one of the boys in blue comes a callin’, she might not be such a willing date.

    We’ll see…it’s only been a month. Haha!

  344. sugarbarbie says:

    am i wasting my time with this? Time to build an exit strategy.

  345. mommapoppins says:

    Cdn- you are right as far as I go. I do not and will not express my self like that. I am lady!

  346. Lily says:

    I’m with you, NYC SB, and this is coming from a girl with whore hands.

  347. CdnGent says:

    Men dig that? Really? Was someone talking about generalizations? LOL!

  348. cleo says:

    i bet all three of those girls get more mail in a day than i get in a month…

    we are a very small percentage of the people on this site…

  349. NYC SB says:

    I bet you those girls get TONS of mail… if you have ever seen millionaire matchmaker Patty (the matchmaker) loves telling the girls to wear stripper shoes… because men dig that… hmmm a multimillionarie takes a woman in 6in clear heels to a charity function and introduces her to his network… yeah that would fly!

  350. Lily says:

    DC SB, I love you. You funny.

  351. DC SB says:

    NYC sb. Totally agree with you. No one ever lies on their SA profile so it must be fact. & I’m not listening to what anyone else says otherwise. *shakes head*

  352. CdnGent says:

    Standard dress code around here? Oh goodness, a little bit of vomit just found itself at the back of my throat. LMAO! First of all, you’d have to SEE the women I have working in my office. Yeeesh, I’d go blind if they dressed that way. That said, if I could find someone who can carry my travel mug in her cleavage, that would be WAY cool.

  353. Lily says:

    Stripper-shoes are always an indicator. A bad indicator, that is.

    And I won’t post anyone’s profile for ridicule ever again, I was having a catty moment.

  354. CdnGent says:

    CdnGent officially changing his name to “John”

    HAHAHAHA!

  355. DC SB says:

    Cdn, every woman walks around the office like that! Come on, now. 6 inch + heels provide a better view for peering over cubicles, while providing an excellent leg work out. And big boobs falling out of a tiny dress serves to hold items such as pens, post-it notes and coffee cups. Way efficient, I can’t believe you’re not making this standard dress code at your company.

  356. sugarbarbie says:

    Now I really want to change my profile, but what if in the 24hr period prince charming comes swooping through and i miss him! I better just worry about adding photos.

  357. NYC SB says:

    Lily – i didnt mean anything bad by it… its just that these girls are not on the blog… it would be like someone finding your profile and posting it here without your approval…

    also a lot of “SDs” would much prefer these girls over us on the blog… because a lot of SDs are really Johns so for them an escort would be a good match… there really is someone for everyone…

    Cleo – 2 crackers were taunting me… wont happen again… been drinking the lemonade all day long

    DC – yes of course she is a business manager it says so on her profile… and the other one is a model/actress said so on her profile… just goes to prove that most self proclaimed models/actresses on the site are really not… Bella is excluded from this pool

  358. CdnGent says:

    I need a business manager walking around my office dressed like that. Oooh ahhh!

  359. cleo says:

    lasb got your mail btw

  360. DC SB says:

    by the way I was joking, lest someone take my comment too seriously..

  361. DC SB says:

    I don’t know what you guys are talking about but the first one is OBVIOUSLY a business manager.
    Duh.

  362. CdnGent says:

    Lily … those are actually pretty tame examples you’ve found. Although, the middle profile uses a lot of that standard phrasing that I was talking about yesterday. And while I might agree that posting profile numbers isn’t the best etiquette, it does illustrate somewhat what I was talking about yesterday. So … we have professional photos in all cases … there’s more cleavage than a convention of Pam Anderson lookalikes … one calls herself a VIP elite model (I mean c’mon, what the HELL is that?) … one says she’s NOT an escort because she ‘doesn’t work for any agency’ (oh dear) … and with exception of the first one, oh, look at that … they are both models. LMAO! And by the way, before Bella gets upset … THESE are the kind of profiles that permeate the site and represent the lionshare of what I see here. I haven’t seen any of your profiles (Cleo’s excluded) but I’m sure if they’re like hers none of you take the approach these women do. Anyway … that’s that.

  363. cleo says:

    also i’m certain that a healthy number of ‘sd’s’ on this site would be delighted with a call girl who called herself a sugar baby… if not, those of us who are real and articulate would get more than five emails a month…

  364. Lily says:

    NYC SB, you’re right. My bad. What business is it of mine?

  365. cleo says:

    i think there’s as many poof/fake/liar sd’s as there are poof/fake/liar/escort sb’s

    i can’t count the number of jerks i’ve met online or had phone conversations with… let alone the men i’ve met who are boring or misleading and so on.

    frankly i feel bad for anyone on either side of the sugar search who has had to contend with people who don’t treat them with respect.
    .
    nycsb please either stop fasting or stop eating.

  366. NYC SB says:

    Lily – I dont think its right to post someone elses profile numbers…

  367. Lily says:

    sugarbarbie that was my thinking too!!!! I suddenly wondered why I didn’t get more enthusiasm from everyone I c ontacted, and why I still get poofers and such, given that I think I do not fall into any of those undesirable categories either. It made me feel better about myself at first and then kinda worse…for that reason.

  368. Lily says:

    I think you are absolutely right about the 20 to 40 year age spread on blog SBs. blog SDs obviously are older.

    I mean come on…. profile 428725 and 436148 and 427389 are so obviously hookers. SO OBVIOUSLY. sigh. Poor potSDs.

  369. sugarbarbie says:

    oops undesirable

  370. sugarbarbie says:

    If things are that bad then i must be sending a bad signal because I would think potential SD’s would be snatching up anybody that didn’t fit in those endesirable categories.

  371. CdnGent says:

    Lily … weary is an understatement. I’ve been on SA for over 8 months this time around. It’s an absolute wasteland. And I’m glad you talked about things from this side of the fence. I got the distinct impression from some earlier posts that you SBs think ALL potSBs are on the up and up. They are clearly not.

    Oh, and for the record, I don’t have an issue with women in their 40s or even their 50s. Some are rather striking frankly. Beauty is rather quickly nullified when someone opens their mouth. I have found that, by and large, the more mature women are a little less full of themselves, a little less restrictive in their attitudes and a whole lot more grateful for quality conversation.

    I don’t know the ages of everyone here, but I’m guessing a healthy mix of the 20 to 40 set.

  372. Lily says:

    I finally figured out how to view sugarbabies! It was the most eye opening experience of the month. Wow. I really feel for both sides of the coin, now, and have sympathy for the men as well as us gals.

    SO MANY are obviously professionals. And not doing a very good job at hiding that fact either. Although I suppose there’s not much interest in hiding that? But then…why use this site if you’re going to be so direct? Why not promote your business activities in other venues, since, like someone said, most men on this site are not actually seeking a professional….. hmmmm…..

    And so many of the others were just kind of sad. Average or below average looking women, overweight, and as for the ages, I was shocked. SO MANY over 40, over 50, and even over 60 ladies! I mean, a few, sure, there are men who prefer that, but a huge chunk? I was surprised. So few seemed charming in their profile text or photos (I know I don’t either appear sweet or charming in my profile text and the photos don’t show the face so…. I’m kind of the pot calling the kettle black but still….not what I was expecting).

    How do you blog SDs find the weeding out process to be…do you get weary??

  373. Lily says:

    Cdn is absolutely right. Unless he was profuse with apologies and explanations and a clear plan of how he would more than make it up to you without major delay, then….. very bad indicator. Just like he could assume the same about you, that hye is not much of a priority, if you didn’t follow through on your side faithfully.

  374. DC SB says:

    Barbie, VA & I emailed you back responses =)

  375. CdnGent says:

    Hey Sugarbarbie … in my books, a promise IS a promise and if he has greenlighted something and NOT come through, that is just a VERY bad indicator. This is especially true if said SD understood that you were relying on that promise. We are all only as good as our word. If you don’t have that, what DO you have?

  376. sugarbarbie says:

    SB’s how do you handle when your SD doesn’t come through on a promise? Especially a promise you depended on. How many chances do you give him before you drop him? Do you use it as an opportunity to renegotiate your arrangement? Things can’t always be sweet in sugarland, right?

  377. mommapoppins says:

    Cdn- you are right, this is supposed to be one of the stress, drama free, or at least no much drama blog! I guess we are all getting to close. Thats what i have seen happen before. You take things out on the one you care for. You know they will always be there. I am all for the turning it down a notch! Don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy the debating that goes on. You get to see a little of everyone!!!

  378. NYC SB says:

    I ate the crackers… LASB will come and give me a spanking lol… other than that I have been good… Im feeling super tired though… probably due to lack of sleep

  379. CdnGent says:

    Oh and Cleo … that was a joke off the top. As a Canadian, I know you can handle it. Anyone that can wear a leather catsuit like that can handle a LOT!

  380. CdnGent says:

    Awww … Cleo, I had you pegged as a little deeper thinker than that. Hey, if someone said that CEOs are all fakes and scammers, I’d be a little thrown too. But that’s NOT what I said … I said that the girls who ARE pros typically use poor Bella’s occupation and in combination with glaring clues in their photos and obvious turns of phrase in their profile, tend to turn me away before it starts.

    Wow, methinks there is a LOT of sensitivity in the room. C’mon sugars, let’s dial it back down. I love ALL of you. (Well, maybe not so much NC Gent and TexaSD … but I could see a bromance happening. Haha!

    Isn’t this about stress- and drama-free and free flowing conversation that is not to be judged? C’mon everyone … paralysis by analysis is NEVER a healthy outcome.

    Oh, and Cleo … I’ll only leave ONE ball. I brought two of them. Heehee!

  381. ElegantSugar says:

    mommaP- that’s very sweet. Thank you.

    I love how NYGent’s posts challenges my gray matter every single time. I love reading a book that requires having a thesaurus handy. I immediately thought ‘oscenity’ stemmed from ‘ostentatious’. Had I not seen the quick typo post, I would have been reaching for my big T.

  382. CdnGent says:

    Hey CA … for some reason I get that your profile is not available. Sorry, I tried but is there another way to direct me there?

  383. mommapoppins says:

    Doing great NC thanks!

  384. Lily says:

    indicia is now my word of the day. Never again will I say indicators.

  385. mommapoppins says:

    Hey elle- just read the part 2 of your interview. It is awesome. I cant wait for the Q&A!

    To everyone if you have not read her blog you need to!!!

  386. NYGent says:

    There is no single red flag that screams escort/prostitute. It can be a combination of the photo, occcupation, profile narrative, etc. Someone can have an escort-ish photo but then their profile makes it’s clear they’re not (and vice versa). It’s sort of like what the Supreme Court once said about oscenity, “I know it when I see it.” It’s always possible to wrongly assume based on the combo of factors that someone is, in fact, an escort, but if enough indicia are there it’s usually best to avoid.

  387. NC Gent says:

    Hi Mommapoppins – doing well… I hope you are doing well!

  388. cleo says:

    dc sb: lol

    my hourglass doesn’t look like THAT lol

  389. cleo says:

    lily i can go anywhere is someone else gets the ticket *g*
    .
    nycbella er his words not how words

  390. ElegantSugar says:

    Lily – I would love a Spring NYC meet, but those dates are during the Arnold Palmer Bayhill Invitational. No can do.

  391. DC SB says:

    cleo, if I get your hourglass for a couple of hours I already know I’m going to be busting out some beyonce moves to Single Ladies.
    dream come true.

  392. cleo says:

    nyc bella: yes, he was inconsiderate in how words… that said, you clearly (if you keep your profile up) need to find a way to differentiate yourself. even if you said stage actress or something… because while you are clearly not a prostitute it’s equally obvious that many pot sd’s who look at your profile will make that assumption from your job title.

    which is uber lame. but still true.

  393. DC SB says:

    I was wrong this entire time, voila. Issue resolved. You’re correct Bella.

  394. Lily says:

    Ok, so if there would be a Spring NYC meet, would March 25-26 be enough of a warning to get some out of town sugars to come to Manhattan and join us? Who are you? wave your hands!

  395. cleo says:

    DC SB: date! i’ll have your skinniness and you can hate my hourglass and in between a whole lot of fries will disappear *g*
    .
    bye cdn gent, thanks for visiting… leave the ball though.
    .
    CA Dreamin SB: it’s amazing for any kind of hair. use about 15 cents worth with wet hair after a shower…
    .
    lily if you come here it better be somewhere i can get to! (or i’ll come there lol)

  396. DC SB says:

    Bella, def agree you need to cool off. You’re really taking a small issue and completely blowing it out of proportion.

    And, uh.. no, this is no “pissing contest” – if you’d like, I’ll say you’ve won whatever there was to win in this non-issue argument.

  397. ElegantSugar says:

    Bye, LASB. I hope you’re wearing your Bozo panties. ha ha.

  398. LASB says:

    Have a great day Sugars. Running off to work to make a bunch of boring decisions. Yay.

  399. ElegantSugar says:

    Ok, Lils. Then I will settle for “Don’t Stop Believin’ -Journey.

  400. NYCBella says:

    DC~This is the last I’ll say on this subject and then I’ll take a little while off. We have all countlessly argued against the term Escort being applied to a SB on this blog. Why? Because we all associate Escorts with prostitution and do NOT want to be thrown into that category. However, escort agencies are legal business entities as long as they are simply escorting a date to an event, etc….but not engaging in sexual conduct while on said “date.” But we have ALL said over and over again, to rude pot SDs, and to other newbies who are just trying to figure the sugar bowl out that a SB is NOT an E-S-C-O-R-T…ie prostitute. Do we really want to make this a pissing contest?

  401. LASB says:

    Cleo – Email sent. :)

  402. ElegantSugar says:

    sugarbarbie – so funny. I never got picked for any roles I wanted. I was always, always the narrator.

  403. Lily says:

    Ele, I do love it. but it isn’t in the catalog here. limited choices in english.

  404. mommapoppins says:

    Hey NC! How are you?

  405. sugarbarbie says:

    Oh hehe

    Sweet Charity! I played Charity (in college) One of my favorite roles it was big step from playing the evil tree in the wiz hehe

  406. cleo says:

    lasb it’s just cleodna with no underscore…

  407. LASB says:

    Lily – It’s probably NYC. There are quite a few there. These days, I’m the only blogger in LA. :(

  408. DC SB says:

    Barbie, haha. DC mentality.. Alexandria is “too far” – Hell even I’m “too far” and I’m on the metro line. I don’t know what it is about people who live here, if you’re not within a 3 block radius at the heart of DC everything is too far.

    Traveling is more fun anyway =)

  409. mommapoppins says:

    CDN mine as well please, if you don’t mind!

  410. NC Gent says:

    Hi Elle — I know exactly what you are talking about regarding the foundation line… I saw a guy in his 50s that had a clear line on his neck where the foundation stoppped — it was kind of icky — thought he needed help from some makeup artist (or woman) on the proper application of foundation. I do put on sunscreen/moisturized on my face every time after I shower – no crows feet around my eyes yet!

  411. Lily says:

    sugarbarbie, I meant which area has the most blog sugars.

  412. ElegantSugar says:

    Lily – it is a song from the musical Sweet Charity. Go to YouTube and type in search words “Big Spender Sweet Charity” and watch it. One of my favorites. I think you would like it too. Suits your “come hither” personality. It is one of my regular karaoke songs. And yes, I do high kicks while on stage.

  413. sugarbarbie says:

    DC guys say I’m too far yet Cali guys say they’ll fly me in Go figure!

  414. LASB says:

    Lily and Elegant – Yes, I’m so down for a meet in NYC or Miami.

    LIly – If it’s when there are some fun parties, I’m sure your blog Domme would be happy to take you around as her pet. 😉

  415. DC SB says:

    Barbie, I got locals mostly.. and then NYC. I heard FL and Cali are wildly popular, but the few days I had mine up I got no West Coast lovin’ all East Coast. I guess it just depends?

  416. sugarbarbie says:

    Might want CDN to check out my profile too lol. But don’t want to post my id ;(

  417. Lily says:

    Flo – what is that? Gold bulletin? Like, cold coins and bars?

  418. sugarbarbie says:

    seems that everytime I find a SD I like they seem to be in Cali…do they have the most? NYC and FL are frequent too

  419. DC SB says:

    *DON’T imply prostitute.

  420. NYC SB says:

    poof doctor… bella text him… he unpoofs right away… maybe we can meet up together so he can tell us all about his trip to haiti

  421. Lily says:

    Elle — I’m sorry I didn’t! I don’t even know that song! But I did sing a few duets with my gorgeous Kenyan hottie girlfriend who also has the most beautiful voice, and all five of the patrons were enamoured and enraptured. It was so fun. And two wine bottles later we were so tipsy! We did a duet on Black Velvet, Mercy, and Hero.

    Anyway, I’ve decided. I’m coming for the next meet that has enough of my favorites attending. What’s on the agenda for March/April? NYC? Miami? LA? What spot has the most sugars?

  422. DC SB says:

    Bella, I disagree. I think the connotations of “escort” imply “prostitute” – but google the definition of escort, and you’ll see, sex is not involved. At its foundation, being an escort is NOT a prostitute.
    So I totally disagree with you on that one.
    An escort is merely someone who is supposed to escort a man, woman, to an event – and serve as eye candy and intelligent conversation.

    Again, if you reread our conversation, NO one says an escort = whore. What we DID say was, typically, model/actress on SA mind you- not real life, TEND to signify = pro escort.

    I don’t judge..
    But, it seems that, a lot of guys on the site don’t want a pro. We weren’t talking sex, we were talking about someone who makes a living off of this.

  423. DC SB says:

    NYC – thanks for backing me up. You said exactly what I was TRYING to say at 1AM in the morning last night when all of us were discussing the SIGNS of being a pro escort, not typically how any of us feels about those who are ACTUALLY models/actresses.
    And Bella, that’s what you’re missing out on/getting offended over. You are taking what we said as, Bella = whore.
    But what we were discussing was, what telltale signs tip off a pot SD for pro escort. We named quite a few, you honed in on the “actress” part, not even the model, or the “hostess” or that they’re new in town. Nothing. Just actress, took it personally, and to heart.

    We weren’t discussing you at all.

    So you really can’t take it personally.

  424. Flo Rida says:

    Lily – one of my friends in TX bought gold bulletin and he protects it with an armalite and a small caliber pistol, he was also talking about buying a kevlar vest recently. SD invests in real estate (still) and is thinking of a 30 year cycle.

  425. ElegantSugar says:

    LASB – I forgot that about you. Oops. That’s why you own all those crotchless clown suits. Ah, now it makes sense.

    Going back to the topic of seeing a couple most unlikely to be seen together. Have you guys ever seen the Colbie Caillat video, “I think I’m Falling for you” – ? So darn cute.

  426. NYCBella says:

    DC~What I meant by you amended your earlier comments is that you stated that “some women are in fact, models and actresses.”

    But we’ve all been in this sugar bowl long enough to know the implication of the term red flag (i.e. fakers and such)…and I’m pretty sure when we say escort, we mean prostitute. Atleast, that’s what I’ve inferred from the countless discussions on the difference of a SB to an escort.

  427. LASB says:

    Elegant – Hey, there is nothing wrong with a vajayjay parts model. Stop making fun of my profession. We’re legit models!

  428. ElegantSugar says:

    Did I mention that although I am a part-time parts model (say that 3x really fast), that my vajayjay is NOT one of those parts? Now, THAT would be “whore-ish”.

  429. NYCBella says:

    Cdn~I did read all of the posts. In their entirety. I never said you were talking specifically about me, as you most likely haven’t even seen my profile; however, I’m referring to the general stereotype that you have associated in writing with my profession. I was also ranting to those who perpetrate a profession who are really not what they claim. (Which can be said of many professions and titles, that of “SD” as well.)

    NYCSB~Does he? lol it’s been a while and I’m totally not remembering distinct details anymore. Talk about a poof doctor. lol

  430. LASB says:

    Apolo is such a sexy spirit!

  431. ElegantSugar says:

    Lily – you asked for requests last night while you were out at karaoke. I posted one. I’m disappointed you didn’t follow up with an astounding, ” I SANG IT FOR YOU, ELEGANT!”

  432. DC SB says:

    Bella, my intent was not to “ammend” myself. No where in any of my comments did I state that I, DC SB, think actress & model = “whore” as you mentioned. In fact, no one said whore throughout the whole discussion, I myself said that I had been told “model” and “actress” typically set off red flags for pot SDs to mean, pro escort. That is the perception.
    I also stated that some women are in fact, models and actresses, so I have no qualms with that. At all.
    I’m just telling you what typically pot SDs might glide over, because the connotations are such that they have become jaded.

  433. Lily says:

    by the way, my whore hands aren’t so bad. I didn’t get them very long….

  434. NYC SB says:

    NYCBella – just saw a pic of Apolo Ohno… he looks a whole lot like our Dr friend

  435. CA Dreamin SB says:

    Cleo – Is moroccan oil good for conditioning? I have wicked split ends and my hair is so DRY!!

  436. CdnGent says:

    NYC – sorry, but when you quote someone who says you’ve taken something out of context, is the best response to quote someone again moving further out of context? You found two sentences and got offended. READ ALL OF THE POSTS!!! I am NOT talking about you?

    Goodness me …

    That’s it, I’m taking my ball and going home. Haha!

  437. CA Dreamin SB says:

    Thanks CDN – profile number is 377181

  438. cleo says:

    LASB: thanks :)

    try moroccan oil in your hair… it’s actually made for hair and it’s AHHH MAAAA zing

  439. Lily says:

    Cleo, I make it up myself. I’m so wild.

  440. CdnGent says:

    CA … I’m willing to have a look at any profile and offer up MY opinion. I’m just one of hundreds of guys who would be looking at it so you’d have to measure the value of that. Still, I think I’m a fairly rounded individual with a level approach to things. I’d be happy to have a look.

    Oddly enough, since jumping on the blog last week, I’ve spent VERY little time actually looking at SA. After many months, perhaps I’m just a tad weary? I don’t know …

    A few weeks ago, a potSD who seemed to be new to the site asked me how I’d describe it. I shot back that at times it feels like a clown show complete with circus organ music. I’m recalling that comment now and laughing at the irony of it all.

    *CdnGent waves goodbye and piles back into his Volkswagen alongside the two dozen other clowns in the car*

  441. NYCBella says:

    Cdn~Glad you can be so blase about offensive comments that you forget you make, as well as the tone of your post. Posts, which spur on the offensive comments by others. I believe they were, and I quote, “I mentioned that the other day also. Other telltale signs definitely include model, actress or (the best) hostess.” So, you’re right…I just took it out of context. It is offensive and a general blanket statement. I know when i’ve made a comment where I’ve come across as a total b**** and will be the first to apologize if I offend someone. But I guess that’s just me.

  442. DC SB says:

    cleo – I’m totally down for the mutual hating! & we can hate each other over a plate of fries? maybe chili cheese fries? date? 😀

  443. Lily says:

    LASB — me too. :)

    I also think french manicures look classy and elegant and lovely. No decorations, no jewels no colored french tips, nothing. Just plain, slightly squared off (to mimic the natural nail curve) french manicure. I do agree with cleo that the thicker-than-normal-nail thing is a turn off, but like i said, it’s just this month that I’ll have that, and then when I go get all this taken off my nail and go to my own natural nails with their natural length, it’ll be a very thin gel coating to keep the nail underneath from chipping or breaking and to keep the polish from chipping. Then I can always cover up my french manicure with red polish when I feel like it, and take it off and have the french manicure underneath. Fun!

  444. LASB says:

    Cleo – Is there an underscore in your email?

  445. NYC SB says:

    french pedi mani to ME is super classy… however the huge nail extensions with a french mani seem trashy… you know the stripper kind

    For a while there I used a deep red polish… bc it matched my louboutins and i thought it was cute… but prolonged red nail polish use dyes the nail so once you take it off your natural nails look orange… so not going to do that again….

  446. VA SB says:

    Maybe I should have CDN review mine as well….

    Would you??? I don’t want to post the profile number and you can be totally honest privately…..I can have Stephan or OC send you my email or vice versa, and I can shoot you my profile number separately….

  447. ElegantSugar says:

    NC Gent – Your question strikes me funny because of a date I went on with a pot SD. He was wearing a whole faceload of “orangey” foundation. Totally the wrong color and there was even a line at the base of his chin where he didn’t blend well. He was an attractive older man, but apparently the photos he shared with me were ages old. Not sure why he needed the makeup, but he did strike me as someone who would forever be searching for the fountain of youth. He was fit as a mofo. We hugged at the end of the night and I checked my top right away for makeup when I got home. So funny. It’s generally the man who does that. No makeup stains. He must have been wearing Color-Stay 12 hour makeup.

  448. cleo says:

    lasb: done, but still send me the name of the cream okay? when i can afford it i’ll find it by googling you in my gmail…
    .
    lily do you have an actual recipe for that oil or you make it up?
    .
    sugarbarbie: my eyes are okay just starting to get a few little lines and want some help looking good longer.
    .
    that said, i’ve decided… i’m getting my upper lip botoxed or whatever it is they do. not the mouth, the face part on the way to the nose. 12 years of smoking, i just want to give the rest of my face a chance to catch up

  449. NYC SB says:

    NYC Bella – I will side with DC SB on the actress/model… I think the majority of profiles use the term loosely… most of these self proclaimed models have never done any actual modeling work… and the self proclaimed actreses have never acted in anything… just browse a few of the profiles and it will become very clear as to why the SDs see these professions as a red flag… i think you are an exception to the rule rather than the rule dear

  450. LASB says:

    Lily – I use the coconut oil on my hair. LOOOVE It!

  451. CA Dreamin SB says:

    CDN – curious…and in all seriousness, would you review my profile and send me any suggestions via SA email?

  452. sugarbarbie says:

    I always thought french mani’s were the most classy looking *scratches head*

  453. shuronb says:

    ok those that will answer is it all abt sex with the sugar daddy? and is it all worth it?????do you tell him up front what you are wanting and need or does he tell you? do you get something each time you meet for what ever reason?

  454. VA SB says:

    Re the french manicure….at first I was a little annoyed, but then I realized that I KNOW I’m not a stripper and no one would mistake me for one (at least they had better not try it). I don’t have tips or anything, I just have the clear polish over the white tips of my natural nails, so they’re very short. I’m a professional (have an office, meet execs, wear “smart” clothes) and this is really the only “acceptable” type of nail decoration I’ve ever done. It just works for me.

    Re the pics, I don’t have professional ones and maybe mine are a little too “home grown”, but that’s okay. I’m much more of a homegrown kind of chic. Although, it never hurts to change things up a bit. So, while I’ll never use a professional photographer for this site, having “good” pictures from a decent camera never hurts.

    Okay, so I stopped by for just a bit, but I have to go now. Check back in later!

    Ciao!

  455. LASB says:

    Cleo – Here, I did it for you. www dot vitacost dot com/ Twinlab-Na-PCA

  456. CdnGent says:

    Actually … I’m trying to figure out Bella’s rant at all. The discussion of photos yesterday was tempered with people explaining it was only their opinion and that others may have different wishes. There were NO stereotypes although I think that Moon may have posted a couple of fairly general commets that could be construed as unfair.

    Again, as I posted yesterday, the women on this blog are the exception and NOT the rule. Cleo and Taz are the only two regular contributors here from my neck of the woods that I’ve seen. However, if I do a search of profiles from that same geographical area that have logged on in the last week, it would number well over 100 profiles and likely a lot more. That’s a VERY VERY small percentage who actually engage at this level.

    How many of the SBs here have actually spent time closely examining the profiles of their ‘colleagues’ here? You are seemingly all smart women. I assure you that a week or two in my shoes would give you plenty of reasons to understand my perspective. Again, I would suggest that at least 50 per cent of the profiles I see on the site regularly belong to professional strippers, escorts and MPAs (most of whom list themselves as models) and that 80 per cent of the rest belong to immature little girls who have NO idea what a REAL arrangement is about and carry an incredibly distorted sense of entitlement around with them.

    Sorry if it all touched a nerve with Bella but I won’t apologize for any of my own comments because they would only be offensive if taken drastically out of context.

    A few grains of salt are ALWAYS required when reading blogs. Make sure y’all got yours. LOL! Personally, I carry a freakin’ shaker!

  457. LASB says:

    Cleo – Actually, google search Twinlab Na-PCA right now. you can read all about it. It’s awesome since there aren’t all sorts of additives, coloring, etc.

  458. NYCBella says:

    DC~I wasn’t actually referring to you as you amended yourself a few comments down the line. But I know that there are many people out there who equate “actress” with “whore”…it’s a stereotype that we’ve been going up against for ages. Dating all the way back to the Greeks. I’m also ranting at those “Pros” out there who use the false career classification and give us legitimate actors a bad name.

  459. Lily says:

    I love natural oils as well. For my post-shower routine in dry winters, I use a base of safflower oil, and add to it various others like coconut oil, sweet almond oil, vitamin e oil, jojoba oil, and I forget the rest… and some tea tea drops as well even though I’m not wild about the scent but I like the antimicrobial properties and it makes the concoction last a long time in the bottle on my shelf in the bathroom. For my face I so far like the la mer face cream? anyone else have thoughts about a good facial moisturizer?

  460. LASB says:

    Shuronb – I DON’T recommend reading all the old SA blogs. Click through and find the subjects that you are most interested in, then read the first 20 or so posts. After a while, we get way off topic and start chatting about clowns, cleansing, and hookers.

  461. mommapoppins says:

    shuronb just be ready to do alot of reading!

  462. sugarbarbie says:

    no olive oil is way too heavy, spectrum has an organic coconut oil

    coconut oil can be used around your eye area as well. what are your eye concerns?

  463. cleo says:

    lasb do you mind tacking that on the end of the liver cleanse email you’re sending me? love the idea of that salt!

  464. LASB says:

    shuronb – Welcome! I recommend reading some of the SBs “how to” individual blogs, such as ElegantSugar’s and NYC SB’s. Lily’s blog is not a how-to, but fun nonetheless. You can get to their blogs by clicking on their blue names on here.

  465. shuronb says:

    thanks all where do i find the old blogs sorry if i sound stupid like i said early i am very new to all this thanks

  466. cleo says:

    dc sb: i hate you a little right now. feel free to hate me back for how easily i keep weight on – lol
    .
    nyc bella i take omega threes and drink tons of water for my skin… and you can see from my pics that it’s lovely… BUT it wants some help now. body too.

  467. Anna Molly says:

    Hi mommapoppins 😀

    Welcome Shuronb! I agree with everyone, reading the old blogs is the best place to start. 😀

  468. LASB says:

    Cleo – I highly recommend Skinceuticals b5 gel. It’s not a cream and it hold the moisture in your skin. You may also try Twinlab NaPCA. It’s a salt that attracts moisture from the air, and thus keeps the moisture on your skin. It’s something we naturally make, but make less of as we get older. Skinceuticals is pricey. NaPCA is like $8, and the bottle lasts forever.

  469. NYCBella says:

    Also, I’m assuming you drink a lot of water (since you’re a pilates instructor and obviously very healthy)…it’s amazing how much of a difference drinking enough water can do for the skin too!

  470. NC Gent says:

    Hi Shuronb — welcome to the blog. You are at the right place, and the best thing to do is to read through the old blogs. They have a lot of great information.

  471. DC SB says:

    cleo, I meant to say earlier when I saw your french fry comment, that ACTUALLY french fries are the center of my dietary life. I have to have fries at least once a day (I know that sounds gross to most people) and incorp them anyway possible (aka pizza + fries, tacos + fries, sushi + fries).

  472. NYCBella says:

    Cleo~Ah…didn’t refresh before my post went up…yes, I’d say if you’re having difficulty, and are obviously frustrated by it, then to see a dermatologist.

  473. mommapoppins says:

    Hey AM

  474. cleo says:

    shuronb we will help you with specific questions but for general knowledge read the old blogs. that’s what we all did.

  475. cleo says:

    nyc bella i’ve tried some of the top moisturizers that are under a hundred dollars and given them all away. can’t have something that makes me look five years older after a week of use.

    i guess i need something really light, anti aging and with no aloe in it. now, try finding skin care without aloe in it…

    that laugh you hear? me laughing at the attempts…

    (sorry it’s very frustrating to have issues with aloe AND shea butter)

  476. shuronb says:

    hi all i am very new here to sugar babies and i would like if some of the ladies that has been here for a while could give me some advice what to do and not what to look for and all that! thanks

  477. cleo says:

    nc gent he can moisturize and fix his eyebrows and whatever but men never apply makeup well enough to pull it off. go with skin care, maybe a decent moisturizer WITH sunscreen and leave it alone

  478. NYCBella says:

    Cleo~There’s many different opinions about which types of moisturizer work best, but I have to say (and no offense to Sugar Barbie, cause what may not work for someone else works for you), but please DON’T use coconut oil on your face. Atleast, not without seeing a professional aesctetician or dermatologist first. I’ve never heard of a moisturizer that moisturized too accurately. Either it’s too rich for your skin (too emollient) and just sits there and feels sticky without absorbing into the skin, or it is not emollient enough and your skin drinks it up and is still needing more feeling dry and tight shortly after you’ve applied it. Actually there is a lot of research and science behind many skincare products out there, so why not get a moisturizer that has anti-aging benefits or provides firming qualities? If anyone looks at old pics of their great-great grandmothers when they were past the 60yo mark, I’d guarantee you’d say you’d rather look better if a little technology can help. So, my philosophy is I’m not my great grandmother, I want to look more youthful than she did (while trying to avoid cosmetic procedures till absolutely necessary), so why would I use my great grandmothers old techniques?

  479. Anna Molly says:

    How is everyone today?

  480. cleo says:

    elegant i compliment women all the time myself. the trick is to keep walking or to immediately continue the conversation in another vein.
    .
    nycbella don’t hate to say it, i KNOW it… but i can’t find products that don’t make my skin feel WORSE. foundation makes my skin tight. moisturizer makes it dry. aloe dessicates me and frankly no girl at a department store can help me.

    not sure what to do, allergic to sunscreen as well. most moisturizers that i’ve tried are too thick…

    guess i need a dermatologist huh?

    [powder bronzer]
    .
    sugar barbie i was trying olive oil but it was too thick, coconut huh?

    still need something for the eyes…

  481. sugarbarbie says:

    I know a guy that wears foundation and eyeliner but he’s gay. lol Never seen a straight man wear makeup…except rockstars, goths

  482. Anna Molly says:

    NC ~ Hmmm, I’ve never really thought about it.

  483. DC SB says:

    Bella your rant was totally misguided. I was telling you what potSDs across the board have expressed to me. You need to rant at the SDs who have those perceptions, not the people discussing the matter.

  484. NC Gent says:

    OK — because we are talking about moisturizers, etc… I notice more and more men my age that are obviously wearing moisturizer, facial skin creams, and eye concealer (mainly the latter). I am thinking I might be heading towards metrosexual lol When they wear the concealer that is way too light, it looks funny. What do you SBs think of this and have any of you noticed it?

  485. cleo says:

    hey bloggers, male and female

    i’m curious, if you were meeting a blogger and you know who they were and they didn’t know who you were or whatever… would you tell them? or if you had met a blogger and then joined the blog, would you tell them? how would you feel if you found out later?

    i would want to be told, and i’m so overly let it all hang out honest that i would of course always tell… but i wonder :)
    .
    elle: i had to give up mani/pedis in the fall so i’ve been doing super clean and well shaped plain nails but i REALLY need some professional attention to my cuticles…

  486. NYCBella says:

    LASB and Elegant~lol…I was just looking into my clown closet and trying to figure out what getup my SD would be most amused by…I’m thinking of going the rodeo monkey riding dog act though as a followup to my juggling and prat falls. Just incase my 27 year professional artistic career decides to not pan out.

  487. ElegantSugar says:

    NYCBella – I hear you, hon. I almost chimed in at one point, but I felt I already met my quota for ‘rants’ in Q1. You are still entitled to a few more.

  488. sugarbarbie says:

    cleo try coconut oil (small dab) Many times moisturizers make your skin more dry because it moisturizes too actively. They contain chemicals that attract moisture to your “true skin”(the layer below the outer skin) and therefore draw moisture away from the outer layer of skin. Just 3 finger tips worth of coconut oil i like spectrum. Best practice is choosing a moisturizer that promises nothing extra… avoid moisturizers for dry skin.

  489. ElegantSugar says:

    LASB – the clown act is new. Baby steps, love. Baby steps. Don’t put that Asian over-achiever pressure on me – I might freak. I have a balloon animal pump and I’m not afraid to use it. Let that be a warning.

  490. LASB says:

    Elegant – I compliment women way more than men. When I compliment men, they just assume I’m hitting on them and I’m not. When I compliment women, they never think I am hitting on them, even when I am.

  491. NYCBella says:

    Elegant~I understand what you mean. And I generally don’t allow peoples’ misconceptions to annoy me, but I’m angered by a supposedly “open” community making suck ill-informed stereotypes and generalizations.

    Cleo~I hate to say it, but the older we get the more care our skin needs. Also, with age comes drying skin and skin types change as hormone levels change. Sounds like you might want to revamp your skin care regimen. You can have a skin care consultation at your local department store to find out what your changing skin type might now need. Also, are you using a powder or liquid bronzer? Powder will definitely dry you out without a foundation as a base to balance it out, and liquid bronzer doesn’t have enough emollient qualities to stay on top of the skin. It can sink into pores if the skin is under moisturized and cause clogged pores and blackheads. And, with any daytime moisturizer (if you’re not using a foundation), it needs to have anti-oxidants and SPF to protect the skin from environmental aging. (80% of visible aging is environmental-pollution, diet, lifestyle, smoking, sunbathing, etc…; 10% is hormonal; and ONLY 10% is a result of physical aging.)

  492. LASB says:

    Elegant – What?! That’s it? What about the big red nose, rainbow hair, and monkey with accordion? It’s not like you to do things half way. I’m disappointed.

  493. ElegantSugar says:

    NC Gent – I should have stated that differently. I meant men compliment me MORE than women do. Then again, women aren’t very complimentary of one another. I compliment women all the time and sometimes they think I’m hitting on them. Geesh. If only I were bi.

  494. NC Gent says:

    Hi Elle – you get more compliments on your nails than your legs? :)

  495. ElegantSugar says:

    cleo – yes, I have a gel coating over my natural nails and just a bit of white on the natural tips.

    NC Gent – men tend to compliment me the most on my French manicure. Nails & toes. They say they love it.

  496. ElegantSugar says:

    LASB – last night I put on my ruffle cut bustier, garter belt, stockings and stilettos and rode a unicycle while juggling. It was fun.

  497. LASB says:

    Bella – You have mail!

  498. cleo says:

    i think it’s the bad acrylics that make frenches look bad. on real nails i think they’re beautiful… elegant you have what lily is talking about? the coating?
    .
    boston you are boston honey right?

    i think your dad is right, i have this picking cuticles thing i do when i get bored and it makes me nuts. don’t always catch myself but man do i ever agree with your dad.

    some of the opi super darks are gorgeous without being so black… like midnight in moscow or whatever, just gorgeous dark dark dark with bronze undertones in the light

  499. NC Gent says:

    Hello all — I for one love french nails, and I don’t think they say anything other than sexy!

    Also, regarding pics, I actually like the non-professional, self-shot photos, but again I don’t make any judgments about the SB because she has professionally shot photos — I just figure she has reasonable access to having those types of photos. Having said that, there have been a couple of times when the SB that showed up didn’t look much like the pics she had provided, and in all of those cases, they were professionally shot photos. Again, doesn’t mean all professionally shot photos aren’t representative though, but that is the root of me preferring the more candid photos.

  500. LASB says:

    Bella – Oh, you mean our clown outfits? I have a whole collection of those. Now I just need to learn how to juggle… juggle SDs. hehe.

  501. NYCBella says:

    Boston~That could be the point, but remember…hold up 2 types of lingerie to a man (one that you’d consider sexy, one that you’d consider sleazy)…I guarantee, the man will go for the one you consider sleazy, as the one they consider sexy.

  502. cleo says:

    nycbella: i use nothing but facial cleanser in the shower. not even foundation. the skin in my pics? my actual skin plus a touch of bronzer and mascara

    but moisturizer feels like it sits on my skin and if it soaks in i feel like my skin gets tight and weird.

    as for diets, i watch what i eat most of the time because i love food SO MUCH that i just eat and eat otherwise. it’s why i always gain ten pounds at xmas (okay only eight this year, which is now gone) and some weight in the winter. in the summer it falls off. mostly because i eat to my appetite.

    but fasting for weight loss? that’s about as effective as spending money to save it.

  503. ElegantSugar says:

    NYCBella – When I had a profile, for occupation I listed “__________ & part-time model”. I didn’t once think anyone saw that as “escort” and it was the truth. I mean it is something I still do to pays the bills. If I meet someone and get a call for a job that calls for me to spontaneously leave, I need for the SD to understand – just in case he had plans for us.

    I no longer attend ‘go sees’ as I am now (in my old age) no longer interested in standing for hours to ‘walk’ or listen to the petty conversations that tend to take place at ‘go sees.’ I am now a more focused model and get paid for my body parts to be used in images. Woah, I better clear that up before people become curious. I get paid specifically to model my legs. When I saw what everyone else was saying, it didn’t bother me because quite frankly, like you said, from my writing and phone conversations alone, it comes across abundantly clearly that I am NOT trying to sell sex for cash.

    Re: French nails – I have very, very short ones (acrylic pink & white) over my natural nails. Again, my parts modeling requires this. I also have to slather my hands up with lotion and wear gloves over them to keep them soft and often get paraffin wax treatments on them a couple times a month. I also keep a french manicure on my toes. I have never had a man mistake me for being a stripper for either. In fact, they usually comment on how nice my hands and feet look and have said, “I love a French manicure on a woman.” Besides, isn’t it true that a man may not want his woman to BE a stripper, but doesn’t mind the sexy aspects of one – behind closed doors?

  504. NYCBella says:

    LASB~G’Morning!!! No, I’m absolutely sure it wasn’t you. But, they know who they are. I’m reminded of the SouthPark episode where the kids cry “Shenanigans! Shenanigans!” Ooh, and THAT cleanse sounds like something I’m interested in. Email me please! :-)

  505. BostonSB says:

    I guess my thought was well manicured, clean, hands with or without polish are sexy. My Dad’s number one pet peeve is women who pick their nails, chew their nails or have chipped nails. If your going to wear it, rock it and keep them clean/sans chips.

    Black is sexy? I always thought it seemed Gothic or S&M or good for Halloween. No offense to anyone who wears it just my opinion and it doesn’t look good on me.

  506. NYCBella says:

    Ooh! To amend my earlier comment on nail colors…I love painting my toenails red, and doing a complimentary “natural color” ala Sugar Daddy (yep, that’s the color name, and it’s fabulous!) on my fingernails….gives me a chuckle through my day.

  507. LASB says:

    Good morning Bella! It’s still very much morning here. Ok, now I have to think if I said anything about models or actors being lowly… If I came off that way, it wasn’t my intent. I have a lot of actor and model friends and I think they are awesome.

    Amen to the no quick and easy fixes. The cleanse I’m doing is crazy hardcore, but you don’t starve, it’s not hard on the body, it’s packed with nutrients, and it’s super effective. Cleo, I will send it to you.

  508. Lily says:

    morning, mommapoppins!

  509. NYCBella says:

    Morning, MommaP.
    Lily~hmmm…never heard of a gel set done that way, but sounds good. Do you still have to get fill-ins as the nail/gel combo grows out?

  510. NYCBella says:

    Boston~That’s interesting, because research has shown that the top most sexy colors of nail polish to men are #1: Red, #2: Black, #3: French. Now, I’m not one for painting my fingernails red simply because it screams “Lee Press-On Nails circa 1985” hooker, to me…but that’s just my opinion. To each their own.

  511. Lily says:

    Well as for my nails, I just had the extensions put on and they did have to add gel over the natural part of the nailbed so they match, and that part is a bit ‘eh’ BUT this was bio sculpture gel stuff which doesn’t damage the nail underneath at all, so the plan is that when I go back in 3-5 weeks, she’ll remove everything, and then my own nails will have had a chance to grow back, and at that point, it’ll be a manicure without any added length or any thickness. However, it will still be a thin layer of colored gel instead of just normal nail polish, which keeps it from chipping (both your nails from chipping, and your polish color). But you can just let it grow and grow, and even file them and paint/re-paint. Eventually you might want it done all over again, but I think I can upkeep at home from that point for awhile. You have a harder time clipping or filing them, as they are much stronger than nothing at all, but still, you can. Anyone tried this method of manicure that is kind of inbetween fake nails and just a file & polish? It sounds good to me…. I will know in a month what I think….

  512. mommapoppins says:

    Good morning everyone!

  513. NYCBella says:

    Good morning, all. (technically it’s still morning for another 5min…lol)

    Cleo~If you’re feeling dry from the moisturizer, I’d say you aren’t using the right formula (check the ingredients), also, if your skin tends to be on the dry side make sure you’re using a creme versus a lotion (creme is more emollient). Also, it’s most likely a combination of the products you’re using before your moisturizer that are resulting in the moisture imbalance. Soap versus a mild facial cleanser (the skin on the face is different than that on the rest of our bodies), acid based treatments, etc…

    ***RANTING DISCLAIMER***
    (Rant to follow, so if you’re not interested, then scroll on through.)

    There were several “unsugary” (that’s the most I’m gonna say or even a sailor’s ears would turn red) comments regarding professional pics and also the type of profession some SBs may have. To that I have to say….”STOP HATING.”

    Never, once have I included false or misleading photos on my profile, my professional photos look exactly like me (I wouldn’t get work if my book didn’t accurately reflect me, as any legit model and actress can tell you), and if you think “Actress” or “Model” is translation for whore, then I’d say, go back and walk a day in my shoes, and realize that as an actress, I have one of the most difficult career paths/success ratios out there.

    But as a classically trained artist, being able to pursue my career and my passion makes the 95% rejection rate worth it. I love what I do. It’s sad to know that there are so many people out there who can’t say the same and also want to cast a bad light on people in a career path of which they’re envious.

    And, trust me, have a 5 minute conversation with someone who is an “actress” or ANY occupational listing, and you’ll learn quickly whether they’re legitimate in they’re career claims. (Ex: To a woman in finance, ask her about a specific question relating to finance. Ask a surgeon, preferred sucher methods. To an actress ask her about her technique, Stanislavsky, Meisner versus Hagen, union affiliations, etc…) There are fakers in every “career,” but to make blatant stereotypes is disgusting and beneath anyone I’d ever take into consideration for a SD. Because, I refuse to settle for less than the best.

    Ok…rant over.
    ***Anyone who scrolled on past may resume reading***

    CaDreaming~Happy Belated!

    Lily~I agree…I think one of the biggest complaints I’ve had from men is a lack of appetite or obsession over weight…and, I’m not by any means a person who is simply naturally thin (but I work out and don’t fall for fads…cause Elle is right, you do a cleanse (aka fast) for a week or 2 and then you resume eating and your body will decide to store everything in attempt to prevent starvation…the quick won results disappear even quicker.) There are cleanses that you can do which involve powder mixes and such, but don’t require starvation like the MC does. At the end of the day, there’s no shortcuts to achieve long term healthy results and life styles.

  514. BostonSB says:

    Cleo I have never had fake/gel nails just read the article. French is fun once in a while but now…I think I will stick to the red toes and whatever color I am feeling for nails… 😉

  515. cleo says:

    lily no one says the property you buy has to be in helsinki

  516. cleo says:

    boston i never liked the french, too fussy. do the other one, clear coat over white tips. makes it clear the nails are real and then it doesn’t look fake.

    it’s the thick fakeness of gel nails that makes them look so bad, not the manicure itself

  517. Lily says:

    yeah but NYC SB you’re not running a sugar business. So how do you put cash into your company? I’m also about to start a business (need to finish business plan and get start-up grant!), so I thought about invoicing my SDs as a freelance consultant, and getting the allowance that way, into my company. I can at least spend it on whateve rI can claim is a business expense (travel is one) without paying income tax on it. But for buying personal property, yeah, taxes. And in this country that means dividing it by three. :/ I hate to give two out of every three sugar dollars to the government…..

  518. BostonSB says:

    Lily – Yes you saw it right. I posted it on the other blog because I was shocked/flabergasted that men associate french manicures or fake nails with strippers. I never would have thought or guessed that one. The reason being is that the majority of those women have fake french nails that look fake with the unnatural white tip. Thus, when men meet you they associate french nails with strip clubs and exotic dancers.

    Damn it, there goes my excitement of the once in a while french nails. That article has ruined it for me now…sigh….LOL I just thought they looked pretty and well manicured.

    Curious what other SB’s think or any SD’s?

  519. cleo says:

    nyc sb the master’s drink is designed to be used alone. you can have peppermint tea or swig the syrup…

    don’t turn off your digestion and then eat, it’s very hard on you

  520. NYC SB says:

    Lily – for me the allowances have taken care of most of my debt… and the rest will go into my business… if the business is profitable then sure I will have to pay taxes … however the old saying is still true “if you are paying taxes it means that you are making money”

  521. NYC SB says:

    Cleo – for sure I took everyones advice in… we will see what happens and IF i can sustain it… there is a pack of crackers on my desk that is oh so tempting… and ummm french fries for lunch… BLAH

  522. cleo says:

    LASB: yeah when i cleansed it did it to clear out my car accident and the five years of change that followed it. felt like i ‘didn’t get it all’ so did it again the next year

    that said, i want to do a liver one, you seem like the type to do research, do you mind emailing me your liver cleanse preferences? lily has my email?
    .
    in other news, thanks all for putting up with my fever inspired funk. i’m still over searching for men in my area, it’s become utterly clear to me that there’s no point whether i dig them or not.

    but that’s no reason not to look elsewhere right?

  523. LASB says:

    Lils – I don’t know about investments where you avoid taxes. The flute sounds good. I say, pay the taxes and buy property. It’s the gift that keeps giving. :)
    For the record, I don’t cleanse to lose weight. I do it mostly to get smarter, with the side effect that my face glows after. It gives my mind such clarity. I can’t talk about the fraxel yet, but will after I get it. :)

    Cleo – No Asians in Tank Girl. He just meant that style/personality type as opposed to desk job chicks who wear Ann Taylor.

    SD news – Pot SD#2 first date went very well! Conversation flowed easily. Didn’t talk about the arrangement or even the site which I actually found really refreshing. He lives waaaaaay far, but might meet up with me when I go out to hear some live music tonight. I’ll keep you posted.

  524. Lily says:

    cleo, white gold.

  525. Lily says:

    meant to type that it’s easier to store/more portable than *a laptop*

  526. cleo says:

    lily gold is very expensive right now and platinum LOOKS like silver… might be a better metal choice?

  527. CA Dreamin SB says:

    Lily – Birthday was really good. Had lunch at my favorite place and got a great cupcake from a little bakery close to my house. Delicious!

  528. cleo says:

    LASB: man i did love the movie tank girl… though i don’t remember any of the stars BEING asian… it’s kind of an odd reference?
    .
    lily: i was ten pounds up at xmas, means i was wearing 33 jeans. i should be wearing 30’s or 29’s. am down to 31/32 now so it’s coming. anything below 28 and i look B A D though

    that said, i can’t find moisturizer that doesn’t dry out my face, riddle me that!
    .
    NYCSB please read last night’s posts, you got some great advice about cleansing.

  529. Lily says:

    :) Thanks. It’s easier to store and more portable and has a great excuse to it (lie and say you do), so….. if you don’t want cash sitting in a safe deposit box, then there you go. Get a platinum or gold handmade professional flute.

  530. Lily says:

    Morning, CA Dreamin! how was the birthday day?

  531. sugarbarbie says:

    Good question Lily… I am interested in hearing ideas too…I don’t play the flute soooo you’re one up on me 😉

  532. CA Dreamin SB says:

    Morning all!

    CDN – You are hillarious and I love you additions to the blog!

  533. Lily says:

    DC SB, oh good! I’m not the only one! I want to talk about……

    what are some good items to invest your sugar cash into that will hold value and avoid issues with taxation?

    I already plan on saving up for a 30k gold flute (I play the flute) so that will be my first ‘nest egg’ that I can put away from sugar allowances, that I can play and enjoy (and do a happy dance about–always wanted one) that doesn’t go down in value. It’ll be there in the future when I might need the cash, and it doesn’t arouse any suspicion from anyone.

    Jewelry is a horrible investment.

    Any other thoughts?

  534. DC SB says:

    NYC, oh man.. yum indeed. & now I’m hungry, no surprises there.

  535. Lisa says:

    I hate summer. It it too hot here, unbearable. It’s just perfect right now.

  536. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    Uggghh – the weather is sooo horrible and nasty!! We just had a sunny and mild weekend :( Supposed to snow all week and then get warm sunday again…

    I am soooo ready for summer…thinking very very warm thoughts…

  537. NYC SB says:

    DC SB – you said food and I keep thinking about that mo mignon and noodles from the restaurant… talk about YUM!

  538. Lisa says:

    Aww thanks NY Sd, I feel the same way about you

    You got me out of Texas for awhile and away from the quality people in my neighborhood, lol

  539. DC SB says:

    Good morning everyone.

    Lily that was me who talked about over-eating to not lose weight. I agree cleanse talks are boring Zzz. I’d much rather talk about FOOD! =)

  540. Lisa's SD (The one in NY) says:

    I am very happy Lisa has found this fellow who is local and can do so much for her.

    Knowing Lisa is a pleasure and I suspect will be for the rest of my life. I have not one bit of regret nor disappointment and I doubt I ever will. Her character should be aspired to by everyone on SA. She is the essence of what a person capable of an honest relationship/arrangement must be.

  541. Lily says:

    Hiya NYC SB! Hi everyone!

  542. Lily says:

    A normal local guy asked me to get together and play chess just now. He hinted about coming to my place but I suggested a cozy pub nearby. he didn’t like that and suggested a bar in a hotel that I didn’ t know but said it wasn’t far. I said, “since you are on foot, why not grab a taxi, pick me up at my door, and we go there together, so a) I don’t get lost and b) its’ sooooooooo cold outside, with a wind, so it’s like living hell after 3 or 4 seconds to be out in it”. I just came in from outside and I’m still cold an hour later, shivering.

    He said, “I’m not going to get a taxi.” I said “ok” and we basically exchanged a formal-pleasant goodbye after that.

    Sheesh. Are the men coming off as more and more rude or am I getting my perception more and more twisted from the generous, chivalrous SD gentlemen out there?

  543. NYC SB says:

    Hiya all… day 1 of the cleanse…

  544. sugarbarbie says:

    Thanks Anna Molly!

  545. Anna Molly says:

    Morning Lily :)

  546. Anna Molly says:

    Sugarbarbie ~ Gravatar on the dot com. I think that is what everyone uses. :)

    Hope that helped!

  547. sugarbarbie says:

    How do I add an Avatar on here?

  548. sugarbarbie says:

    Good Morning!

  549. Lily says:

    Oh, and morning AM!

    I have been breaking out of my comfort zone and ditching the english when I’m out and about with people who are highly uncomfortable in english. I’m proud of myself. Able to have a lengthy conversation of an hour or more about all sorts of abstract concepts, and not in a language I consider to be very good in (and super difficult for foreigners to learn)….. yay! Today it was the nail technician and last night it was the overly friendly married man on the train that wanted to set up an ongoing affair with me for when he’s in my city. Blech. He was nice to talk to and a decent smile, but… no way/not in this lifetime.

  550. Lily says:

    Hey, just got my whore hands & feeling fine…

    What are whore hands? Well I just decided on that slang term to refer to French manicures. Didn’t we just discuss that on here, that men associate French manicures with prostitutes?

    I swear i read that on here.

    I’m such a ditz. Took out couple hundred in cash from the ATM and two minutes later I couldn’t find it. Must have fallen to the ground. I backtracked but couldn’t find it. Sheesh.

    Tonight I have Swedish guy over to cook for me. It’s my monthly dose of bfe. He cuddles well. He wants more, I do not,…

  551. Anna Molly says:

    Hello All! Isn’t it a beautiful Monday? I’m feeling tons better and my neck doesn’t feel like it’s going to explode anymore! I still feel a little tired, but that is really it. I’m so glad I went to the Dr. when I did or it would have been so much worse.

  552. Lily says:

    By the way, am I the ONLY woman on here who finds all this diet/cleanse/exercise talk boring?

    That being said, I can see the value of a cleanse. It makes sense. I just have the attention span of a goldfish when it comes to that.

    But no one wanted to dish about laser fractual resurfacing or whatever it was that Bella was talking about? or stamps/rollers? I’m all about turning back the clock and treating the skin right…. I’ll happily eat up that convo with a spoon. Or are you guys all already enjoying the fountain or youth (or then really are 19 or 21 or something) that no one told me about (I am excited I actually use a serum AND a moisturizer before I go to sleep–I used to use soap only!), and the only thing you are into is dropping dress sizes to do the annorexic teen look?

    😉 I’m just kidding, totally joking around about that trying-to-look-annorexic comment.

    But seriously if I did any dieting or whatnot I *would* look annorexic and I’m more like the one who said she needs to eat a lot so she doesn’t lose weight (was that DC or VA? I forget)…. I am not in that extreme side of the equation but I definitely can’t mess around with diets/fasting and dropping weight or I would start to disappear.

  553. TexaSD says:

    Alright ladies, thanks for the company, guess I will try and pass out. Night LA and Beach

  554. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Do the hookers still come out late night Sunset lol… oh man my friends never believed it till they actually saw it lol…

  555. LASB says:

    I’m out too. If I don’t get enough sleep, I start looking my age.
    G’nite sugars!!

  556. Beach_ Girl in LA!!! says:

    Well I am off to Dream land… good night!
    LASB ~ i’ll call you tomorrow!

    TxSD~ it was nice seeing you on the blog again! night

    Talk soon Sugars!!!

  557. LASB says:

    It cracks me up how people in LA HATE driving, ***unless*** they don’t have anywhere to be. hahaha

  558. TexaSD says:

    LASB- probably, I got so many tickets there, and for every little reason. One time by Pepperdine, for no license plate light… so lame, they were mad, I asked for the gun lol….

  559. LASB says:

    TX – I hear ya. I used to do the late night Sunset drive down to the PCH, and then the PCH up to county line. Do you surf too? Neptune’s after surfing… Good times!

  560. TexaSD says:

    God I miss the being there sometimes, Late night Malibu PCH to the Pier in SM..

  561. LASB says:

    TX – Oh, so that was YOU on the side of the road getting pulled over. I always would fly by you and think, “oh good, he’ll keep ’em distracted for me.” haha My detector goes off all over the place right by Peperdine.

  562. TexaSD says:

    Omg, you know, I haven’t been to City Walk in forever, that was always my cheap date place lol….

  563. Beach_ Girl in LA!!! says:

    TxSD~ yes been to Santa Monica… and put my feet in the sand!

    LASB~ yes, june can get cold spells … but jan and feb are the worse in Cali

  564. TexaSD says:

    LASB- ya thats because of me, Malibu canyon area I used to speed like it was Laguna Seca lol…. Ohh Good Times…

  565. LASB says:

    TX – Actually, I was just there tonight. Date was in Malibu. Freakin’ beautiful night!!

  566. LASB says:

    TX – It’s a great drive, but make sure your radar detector is plugged in. Speed trap central!!!

  567. LASB says:

    TX – Yeah, I did a lab at Glendale too and it’s way better. I was just looking for a cheap place to make prints. That was years ago, though. Now, I just outsource everything or shoot digital.

    Beach – Feb always cold and rainy? No way. We get jan and feb heat waves every year. June is when it can get cold. Anyhow, “cold” here is like 55. lol. I wore a thin skirt to my date tonight. It was fine and I have thin blood.

  568. TexaSD says:

    Beach- lol ya, its hard not to be, Have you been down to Santa Monica Promenade? Or to the bluffs park in Long Beach?

  569. Beach_ Girl in LA!!! says:

    Ha txsd i’m only here for 2 weeks…. i am always busy lol….

  570. TexaSD says:

    Beach- I used to love to drive out to Los Virgenes ( can’t remember the spelling) basically going out to Malibu, right by Pepperdine University. Thats the coolest drive late at night, when you got nothing to do…

  571. Beach_ Girl in LA!!! says:

    TxSD~ i use to live in Venice… the the Valley for work

  572. TexaSD says:

    lol you can google map it…..

  573. TexaSD says:

    Beach- Its been a few years since I lived there, But I used to live in north Glendale, well Hell i will give you guys the address lol, 1120 Melrose Ave Glendale 91202, it was always a little cold there, except the summer, but i think thats because of the closeness to the mountains lol

  574. Beach_ Girl in LA!!! says:

    LASB~ HA it WINTER here…. it’s cold sometimes.. when i use to work out here Feb was always cold and rainy… cold stuck in the valley once coz of fluds

  575. TexaSD says:

    LASB- I can’t remember if Glendale College has anything photo related, but you can check there, I studied about a semester there.

  576. LASB says:

    TX – Oh smallllllll world! I started taking a darkroom class there, but it was so ghetto I dropped out. hahaha.

  577. LASB says:

    No way! Before you got here, it was 79! I had to run the AC last week. I even got a bit of a tan!

  578. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Lol I did 1 year at Pasadena City College… funny stuff

  579. Beach_ Girl in LA!!! says:

    LASB~ HA… you are funny girl, it’s always cold in Feb here lol….
    it was nice, tonight I wanted to go to the Cat Club but wow, am I tired!

  580. LASB says:

    TX- I lived in Pasadena, so I’d go to Glendale to buy art supplies and organic food. haha. Also, used to do photoshoots in the old abandoned fire station off Colorado. Now, there’s a ginormous mall there.

  581. Beach_ Girl in LA!!! says:

    txSD~ I’ve been here plenty of times… It’s just been a year or so since… i use to work here….

  582. LASB says:

    Beach – Yeah, thanks for bringing that cold Northeast weather with you!! 😉 OMG< 4th and B… Brings back memories. I didn't even know it still existed.

  583. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Who knows lol, I live in Glendale for a while…

  584. TexaSD says:

    that porn star that had the affair with Tiger woods, whats her name again? because there is a joselyn pink, here on SA.. and I remember the porn star that gave Tiger some luvvin is like Joselyn something..

  585. LASB says:

    TX – You were in Glendale? Oh wow. When? I wonder if we ever passed each other in the aisles of Whole Foods. haha.

  586. Beach_ Girl in LA!!! says:

    LASB~ well there was a concert with friends last night at 4th and B
    very cool , had a blast… then hung out and had fun a little today walked around… wasn’t that warm though

  587. TexaSD says:

    Beach- I used to live near Noho, in Glendale, how you like it?

  588. LASB says:

    Hey Beach – Good move. San Diego is fun and a great day trip from here. :) Where’d you hang out?

  589. Beach_ Girl in LA!!! says:

    TxSD~ in the area lol…. North hollywood

  590. LASB says:

    Well, I’m told I’m not your typical Asian– What an ex referred to as “the typical Ann Taylor Asian.” He said he was more into “Tank Girl Asians,” so I guess I’m a little more out there.

  591. TexaSD says:

    LASB- haha thats funny

    Beach- How is it going? Where in LA are you?

  592. Beach_ Girl in LA!!! says:

    Hello sugars!
    LASB~ sorry , i just got back from San Diego ,… will let you know for tomorrow

    Hi everyone 😀

  593. LASB says:

    Hmm… Now I’m curious about your profile.

  594. TexaSD says:

    Nope, I just got the yellow fever bug, all the time in Asia I think… lol

  595. TexaSD says:

    Lol, you never know, I dunno your age, but my age range goes above my own

  596. LASB says:

    TX – Are you Asian too?

  597. LASB says:

    Oh yeah. I’m definitely in your range. I’m dancing with fire on my pic. I’m too old for you, though. LOL

  598. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Well I dunno, However, I have a few asians in the LA area, I don’t know which ones had face pics off the top of my head.

  599. LASB says:

    TX – I’m sure you haven’t favored me. I don’t even show my face or anything.

  600. TexaSD says:

    You know, Travel size lol

  601. TexaSD says:

    LASB, noo, thats out of my height range, too tall… I am all about 4’10-5’4

  602. TexaSD says:

    Alright, Goodnight cleo.

  603. LASB says:

    Did someone say Asians? I’m not anywhere near 5’5″ Do you only like tall girls? If so, I’m not for you.

  604. TexaSD says:

    Cleo- you going to pass out now? Or Should I bore you to death? We can go over some of my reports?

  605. TexaSD says:

    Cleo- Lol, you never know…. LA and Asian, I have a few of those…

  606. cleo says:

    texasd i doubt it, her photo is body only lol

    yeah my sleep sched is all screwed up after a week of flu. this week will be most odd

  607. TexaSD says:

    I am just up burning the midnight oil, maybe I’ll hit the sack soon…

  608. TexaSD says:

    Really? I wonder If I have favorited LASB then lol… That would be funny. ohh, so she is taller than 5’5?

  609. cleo says:

    TexaSD good to know Asiansb is well, haven’t heard from her here in ages.

    we are the only ones up right this second but i’m about to go to bed, first day back at work tomorrow (light day thank goodness) after my week in bed. fortunately no bed sores lol

    elegant and lasb are both asian? i think elle is taller than your height range though… (and a few years older than you lol)

  610. TexaSD says:

    Cleo- Well, If she bails on me, I’ll let you know the minute she does lol… Are we the only ones up? Seriously no Asians online, was someone teasing me about that? Oh, which reminds me, AsianSB is in Phuket now, or still in KL, not sure. last email I got from her was last week. I think, I should probably email her back, maybe tomorrow I will.

  611. cleo says:

    texasd: i don’t need a lot of notice unless i’m paying for my own airfare. then i need at least a month (or a temporary loan ;>.) but since i’m self employed the drop everything and go plan works all right for me…

  612. TexaSD says:

    Cleo- Naa, nothing wrong, who knows, won’t be the first thats ever happened to me… I know it won’t be the last time

  613. cleo says:

    texasd i do find myself hoping your second bails on you… is that wrong?

  614. TexaSD says:

    Cleo- I think it will be fun, I did one in the US, it was pretty cool, even though most of the cities we drove thru were ehh.

  615. cleo says:

    lasb: i’m not a little girl … but i’ll send measurements if you ask nicely..

    i used to think i wanted to be a domme but really i just loooove the clothes.
    .
    texasd: i’m daydreaming about that cannonball run now lol

  616. TexaSD says:

    Ok I saw an Asian comment, I love asians…… Just felt like I needed to say that lol

  617. LASB says:

    Ok, you’ve GOT to try latex! I’ll bring some when we meet up in Finland. :)

  618. cleo says:

    lasb: yeah dude, and five inch platforms *g*

  619. LASB says:

    Cleo – The outfit rocks. Pvc?

  620. cleo says:

    lasb i’m in the middle of the street in the gay village in toronto on hallowe’en a couple years ago (but i’m in better shape now so it’s current enough) and there’s like five people taking my pic on the left half of the photo

    lol

  621. cleo says:

    photogirl i added it yesterday. views yes, messages no. mostly i just thought y’all would like it.
    .
    lasb: the thing that’s scary about quitting smoking is one day you forget how hard it was and having some nicotine doesn’t seem so dangerous. very bad place to be.

    that said, that’s relatively close yes.

  622. LASB says:

    Cleo – I dig the new pic! Very fun party pic! :)

  623. LASB says:

    Cleo – You probably have to get the book. That’s how I learned about it, anyhow. The premise of the book/diet is that if you clean your liver then you will burn the fat, since the liver helps process fat. If your liver is running efficiently then you can start burning and processing the fat faster. Also, toxins get stored in fat, and when you are so toxic that you run out of fat to hold the toxins, your body makes more fat.

    I was never a big smoker, so I’m just going on what other people tell me about quitting. At some point, you reach a point where you don’t crave it and it’s not desirable. Is that what you experienced?

  624. photogirl says:

    Cleo – Fun pic! When did you add it? Have you noticed an increase in views/messages?

  625. cleo says:

    i’m bummed i thought you guys would be so amused by my trinity pic on my profile… ah well :)

  626. cleo says:

    lasb have you quit smoking?

  627. cleo says:

    photogirl i’m honestly pretty happy with my diet although i acknowledge about ten percent more carbs/bad food than i really want. but the truth is if i just ate ten percent less all together and kept the ratios the same? it would be perfect.

    well it’s definitely a digestive cleanse, you drink a laxative tea day and night (well you’re supposed to salt water flush in the morning which can be replaced with the tea – i did the sw flush ONCE and my guts were like “oh no she did NOT” so i switched to the tea)

    oh yeah, if doing the masters cleanse the SENNA TEA IS ESSENTIAL OR YOU WILL BE IN HELL!
    .
    LASB i googled fat flush but it seems i need to buy a book, do you have a site that you like?

  628. LASB says:

    Cleo – I hear ya on the bread. I was a bread addict, but stopped eating it a few years ago. Now, I don’t really miss or crave it. It took a long time, though. Maybe like quitting smoking.

  629. cleo says:

    (sorry, had done the oj and was supposed to be on the soup. anyway after the fries i ate vegetarian for days and nothing else like that but mmmm so good)

  630. photogirl says:

    Although I am intrigued about this Master Cleanse… will need to check that out when I return home! Is this similar to a colon cleanse?

  631. cleo says:

    one time i broke the fast with french fries

    i couldn’t help it, i had this whole orange juice and soup plan and was in a car that went to wendy’s … stole a fry and then made the driver go back and get me some

    best fries ever

  632. photogirl says:

    Way too much to catch up on…. so if I missed anything let me know 😉

    Cleo – Bread basket is my friend!!! I love bread, can never give up my bread and cheese! But then again I have a very different diet than most.

  633. ATXemily says:

    I think the best benefit of the Master Cleanse is that its like hitting a restart button. Once you’ve gone to all of that effort to cleanse your body, you are really hyper aware of every thing you put into it. On day 8 of my cleanse, I was having cravings for arugula as though it were a pint of ice cream.

  634. cleo says:

    lasb i’m just really trying to simplify and clean up my diet. i have a fatal addiction to fries and the like but i am doing pretty well at a lot of the cheeses and desserts and stuff.

    i just need to stop eating the damn bread basket! (seriously, the bread basket in restaurants is my worst enemy)

    :)

  635. LASB says:

    Cleo – I actually liked the Fat Flush Plan. I never followed it exactly, but I added in stuff to my normal diet (cranberry juice, fiber, lemon water, omega eggs) which seems to help things. I’ve never had a weight problem. I just do these cleanses to give my mind clarity. Ok, also so I can avoid guilt when I totally pig out.

  636. cleo says:

    CdnGent: can i take you up on those photos?

  637. CdnGent says:

    I just saw a former potSB on Olympic crowd coverage. LMAO!

  638. cleo says:

    LASB i hope anyone who chooses to cleanse does a lot of research and doesn’t just dive right in.

    i’ve been thinking of doing that brown rice and vegetables thing… just sort of streamline what i eat for a while

  639. ATXemily says:

    Just reading through the blogs, enjoying everyone’s insights and humor. So many Austin references in the last blog comments, thought I should pipe in and say hello.
    Looking forward to chatting with you all!

  640. LASB says:

    BTW, I still see Kobe beef every time that blog pic comes up.

  641. LASB says:

    Cleo – I agree with you on the master cleanse. I believe it cleans you out but leaves you unbalanced. Also, yes, Grade C is the preferred syrup. I was wondering about the teeth thing, so thanks for reminding me. Lately I’ve been drinking a lot of lemon water. It’s put a glow in my complexion, but I’m not trying to disintegrate the enamel on my teeth. Anyhow, the liver detox I’m doing is super nutrient rich. However, it’s tons of work b/c you have to juice and make broth, etc. For someone who cooks often, it’s probably no big deal. But for a restaurant junkie for me, it’s work in the kitchen that I don’t enjoy.

  642. cleo says:

    personally i blame the masters cleanse for my two years of bladder/yeast/girly problems… but maybe it’s just me :)

    you MUST use dark maple syrup, try the health food store … VERY important, not enough nutrients in it otherwise

    the lemon eats your teeth, drink with a straw

    if you are working out don’t be afraid to swig the syrup

    yes cayenne or you’re doing it wrong

    don’t cheat don’t cheat don’t cheat don’t cheat don’t cheat don’t cheat….

  643. LASB says:

    Taz and NYCSB – You have mail. Don’t cry when you read the instructions. It’s an awesome experience.

  644. LASB says:

    Oh, that wasn’t supposed to be a question mark. Damn, I hate being a lightweight.

  645. LASB says:

    Yeah, I don’t know what the clown thing came from? I didn’t know clowns were so scantily clad. Maybe MP has seen Zumanity one too many times.

  646. LASB says:

    Cdn!!!! ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  647. LASB says:

    Oh, and don’t get me started with the “What are you?” I just say, “I’m a Goddess.”

  648. CdnGent says:

    LA … I prefer to call it my ‘clown outfit’

  649. LASB says:

    Elegant – Oh, I just posted about that not too long ago. The “What is your nationality?” Duh.

  650. ElegantSugar says:

    LASB – ha ha ha!!

    Newbie – do you ever get the oh-so-ignorant, “What are you?”

    “You mean, what is my ethnicity?”

  651. LASB says:

    Cdn – I mean, not that there’s anything wrong with that. No judgment here.

  652. NewbieSB says:

    LOl yeah I get the “are you part Asian” line alot….And I agree Hawaiians look more like Latinos but theres such a large population of Asians in Hawaii that some confuse the tanned ones for “Native Hawaiians”. And actually Asians comprise over 70% of Hawaiis population. Whites are only about 10%. If you suddenly get dropped on a bus on Oahu you may think youre in Asia! Lived there a few years. Best place on earth.

    Oh and i worked w people off of modelmayhem before as i am an amateur photog. All went well. I think its semi-trustworthy–as nothing online is 100% safe.

  653. LASB says:

    Cdn – You were watching ice dancing? Were you wearing your lingerie?

  654. LASB says:

    Flo – Words of wisdom for sure. I almost never do portraits, but if the person wants a super casual look, I consider taking the job. No one but the client and me knows that we used a light kit and reflectors to get that natural look. There is something to be said for a trained eye.

  655. yeah, maybe I will just stay as Elegant anyway…it was a nice change for a few hours. ha ha.

  656. CdnGent says:

    My team? My team WON!!! Weren’t you watching ice dancing? LOL!

  657. LASB says:

    It’s north of my country, after I’ve had a glass of wine. hahahaha.
    Don’t get all pissy because your team lost. BWAHAHAHAHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHAH

  658. Flo Rida says:

    NewbieSB – I know what you mean by curvy & runway

    All – a professional photographer can create any look that you want including girl next door you just have to instruct him accordingly. Also I advocate changing pics periodically to appeal to different SDs (though Cdn and Moon Patrol may like girl next door they are only two data points and there are others who like glamour (without it being too slutty).

    Trust me a prof photographer will do much better than your mum or best friend or time delay.

  659. LASB says:

    Cdn – I like it when you stir the pot. :)

    Elegant – Anything to help. It’s a win win. We’d be stressing out over finding the right model, and then there would be competition on whose model was hotter. LOL. Oh art school… The biggest waste of money, ever! (but so fun!)

  660. CdnGent says:

    Hey, LASB … where in the world is Cananda? Is that in Africa? LOL!

  661. LASB says:

    Elle, I think I may still want to call you Elegant. Even when Midwest was Mistress blah blah blah blah, I never stopped calling here Midwest. hehe.

    Wow, that Cananda-USA game was awesome!!! I was so glad the pot was running so late, so I could watch more. I was kinda bummed that he showed up with 6 minutes left. I was too polite to keep watching, but secretly wanted to. LOL.

  662. Cdn – I know of such a photo. It is beautiful, I agree.

  663. Uyiyo nkopu, DC.

    That’s code for “good night” to DC.

  664. CdnGent says:

    Oh … since I so enjoy stirring the pot, I’ll let the group know that the aforementioned SB photo that captured my attention so effectively is that of a fellow blogger. Haha!

  665. Great suggestion on the school, LASB.

  666. DC SB says:

    Hahah, Moon! What code? Races? Were they all starting to get all jumbled up?
    :)

    God, it’s 1AM and I get up before the sun does. And I destroyed the grilled cheese I just made (true story). So I’ll probably head off as well. Night all

  667. Good night, Moon. Oh, and I dream every night! In vivid color. Every single night without fail. I love it.

  668. LASB says:

    I’d like to iterate what Cdn says. These photo sites like One Model Place and Craigslist aren’t so safe. I feel like the safest has been ModelMayhem, but even that one can be bad. If you live near an art school or any school with a photo program, you might stop in there and hang a flyer or talk to people there. We sometimes needed 3-4 models a week for our projects, so mulitply that by the number of students, and it’s a lot!

  669. MoonPatrol says:

    DC SB and ELLE-
    I think you guys are talking in code because I don’t understand what you are talking about. maybe thats my cue to go to bed..have a good night and I give you a bow and wish you sweet or NO dreams tonight

  670. LASB says:

    Moon – I don’t have clear photos and lately I’ve been doing better than ever. My pot date tonight went awesome. BGpotSD has competition. :)

  671. DC SB says:

    Elle, funny thing is.. I feel like most people have no idea what “true” Hawaiian looks like but if they can remotely envision you in a grass skirt you’re Hawaiian. But I can see how you get Hawaiian/Latina but you’re Asian.. that sounds about right. Hawaiians look Latina-esque but at the same time Japanese/Chinese/Korean is one of the largest ethnicities in Hawaii. I think Whites beat them by a few percent, but White, then Asian – top races in Hawaii.

    One of my best gfs is Asian and exceptionally tall as well =)

    I get Asian/Black often, because of my eyes.. so I go with it. I dressed up as Kimora Lee Simmons once for Halloween.

  672. LASB says:

    On the pic thing, I hate being in pics, so I don’t have any. I send them 2. That’s what I’ve got and most seem fine with that. For the ones that get pissy and demand that I take more, I realize that they are not the personality type that I am looking for anyhow and so I do the poof. They tend to be the overly controlling, nervous, judgmental types.

    BGpotSD didn’t even ask me for pics. So I didn’t ask him for any. And we are wildly attracted to each other. He is crazy hot! Funny how that works. I love serendipity.

  673. CdnGent says:

    Hey ladies … don’t forget to be every bit as careful with sites like ModelOne.com, etc. They can be dangerous! Everyone remember the Canadian girl that went to NYC to have her photos taken by the online photog looking to bulk up his portfolio? Not a happy ending.

    Stick with friends and family. Someone will be able to throw the camera on aperature priority and shoot a few decent candid shots outdoors. Any notion that a SB profile photo must show a woman in a state of undress or posed up like a Playboy playmate is terribly misguided.

    One of the nicest photos I’ve ever seen on the site was a black and white shot showing the SB casually sitting in a pair of jeans looking off to her left to a distant horizon. Well composed and exposed and contained everything I needed to see.

  674. MoonPatrol says:

    I’m not here to be perfect in my musings, and i’m on a roll .I just don’t care for lingerie . maybe I never had any women present it to me so don’t know what it would do for me in the laboratory.
    Yep SB’s if you got no clear photos you better be a poet or the guys won’t be pursuing ya!

  675. LASB says:

    I love lingerie. I also looooooooove my LED tv. It’s incredible, and I don’t even like TV. I just got it so my dad would stop nagging me that I didn’t have a TV.

  676. DC – I get Hawaiin a lot too. I also get Latina (but I’m much too tall). Asian is actually the last I get because of my height.

  677. Yaz says:

    lol wow wow….
    I think I will come back later….

  678. DC SB says:

    Newbie, yes I was thinking earlier we must look relatively alike, based upon your comment stating that you thought blue/blonde is the ideal – I used to think the same at one point.
    My mom is the MOST fair skinned, blue eyed, Swedish looking Elin Woods-esque woman ever, and I’m completely opposite, obviously – but growing up as a girl I thought THAT was the ideal beauty because that’s what my mom was and we all want to grow up and be like our mommies (aw).
    But anyway. I’m exactly the same – guys I date love it because I can be a different girl practically every month. Haha.

  679. Cdn- hahahaha! That trailer comment. Hilarious.

  680. What sounds like a scam, Moonpatrol. Wow, you might be the first straight man I have ever heard say lingerie is ugly. Who have you seen in lingerie???

  681. MoonPatrol says:

    Yes I’m new to this or new in town sounds like a scam .

    DC SB-
    weird how I noticed that this blue ray is too graphic. The impressionist painters decided to turn reality into their impression of it , after it passed through the filter of their emotions.

  682. CdnGent says:

    MoonPatrol … lingerie is ugly??? Makes a woman look like a clown?

    C’mon, that’s a sweeping generalization no? The only problem with lingerie is, like any fashion, it’s only as tasteful as the woman who wears it. I mean, you can take the trash out of the trailer, but you can’t take the trailer outta the trash.

  683. Moonpatrol – TFP means time for prints. We weren’t telling her to PAY for a photographer.

  684. DC SB says:

    Hahahah. “I’m new here so be gentle” – that’s a good one. At least she was creative.

    I talked w/ a few pots while I was still searching who said essentially the women who have the pro photos & the “model” or “actress” occupation feel as though, yes, men think w/ their member down South and expect them to fall at their feet because in life they do get that. So, duh, naturally a wealthy man will bow down to them.

    Wrong!

  685. MoonPatrol says:

    Elle-
    Tell sugarbarbie to look through all the people in her life and find one who is a camera owner with a slight interest, and just work with her. No no eed to go find a hired photographer for this!
    Also some tips from me:
    Pole dancing is not that attractive.
    Ballet is attractive
    Breast that point strait out are not that appealing.
    Breasts that have some sag to them are very attractive, and this is despite what myths would proclaim. Now forget the old, old ladies mind you.
    Finally, Lingerie is ugly and makes you look like a clown.
    It pushes the breasts up and all that lace is making me think of a transvestite with web leggings like the Rocky horror Picture show.
    Wearing panties and a see-through bra would do wonders for me.

  686. NewbieSB says:

    FloRida, I dabbled in runway modeling back when i was 13-14. It was the only point in my life when i was thin enough lol im far from fat but def too curvy for that now–unless I take up glamour type stuff….Do not want!

    DC SB, same here w being chameleonic. I tried to post pics where my hair is the same because depending on how I wear it I appear to be of different ethnicities–and sometimes just completely different people. Everytime I show someone a form of photo ID they are alarmed at how different I appear racially in each of them. I have gotten East Indian, Greek, Black, Latina, Egyptian…all dependent on my hairstyle and the lighting lol Consistency is very important in our case, I think….

    Also, I think its weird to assume pro shots means you are a pro. Plenty of regular folks take pro photos, simply to have them.

  687. CdnGent says:

    Hey DC … better than that is a profile that says “I’m new here so be gentle” or something like that but their member number is like 100123. LMAO! One of my great disappointments in the site is how incredibly dumb some potSBs must think most of us guys are. We don’t ALL think with our miniature brains.

    I’ve decided that as a former professional photographer, I should offer my services to any SB that may want some quality professional images that don’t make her look like Slutty McWhore. Haha!

  688. DC SB says:

    Moon OMG I totally agree. I was just ranting about that on my twitter. Blue Ray makes EVERY movie look under budget. I do NOT want to see someone’s pimple on their face, or notice the bags under their eyes. No gracias.

  689. DC SB says:

    Cdn, I also heard “I’m new in town” or “Just moved here” etc. is a big red flag.

  690. I think professional photos are fine if you really look like the professional photos. Glamour shots are so obvious because of the hideous poses, use of soft camera lenses and the more makeup than necessary look. I think the advice we were giving earlier about getting a photographer & MUA for a TFP shoot was because sugarbarbie was frustrated that she only had a camera phone (without a flash) and didn’t have a single friend or family member with a camera who could shoot nice photos of her. Just because they are professionally shot, does not mean they are going to come across as being “hey, look! I”m a magazine print model who wears too much makeup!”

  691. MoonPatrol says:

    TT- I love hooters, but never go into the place. Its like a contradiction. I like the way they look but know they are often air headed and being used.

  692. DC SB says:

    Moon – Yes that’s definitely what they would do. The guys these women were talking to would sometimes stumble across me on FB for instance and write me saying “oh don’t you remember me we talked on Bebo” and I would say, I only have a FB, and a myspace.. that’s impossible.

    But….. I was not so concerned with that but more so that they were acting horribly class-less and I was always worried someone that I actually might know would stumble across these chicks, think it was me, and that somehow I was living some double life as a part time sexy chat girl.
    Grr.

    On a side note, most sites will remove fake images if you send in a pic w/ a signature. In case anyone ever has that problem..

  693. MoonPatrol says:

    THe eye of an artist is more powerful than 100 books on the matter. You just have to look at things with the wonder of a child with the technical ability of an adult. Thats why its hard to get your neighbor to take a good PIcture of you as a rule book won’t get it.

  694. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    CDN- I have worked in restaurants but NOT hooters 😛 I am safe lol

  695. CdnGent says:

    Hey lilSB, I gotta make sure none of the SBs here are former Hooters girls before I can tell this story. LOL!

  696. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    DC – lol I shouldn’t care b/c it is hidden anyway lol…

  697. Well, I have met men from the site after seeing grainy and “not my preference” types of of photos (i.e. an old family photo with wife and kids cropped out). In those cases, aspects of their personalities outranked the poor quality of their photos and I wanted to give them the benefit of the doubt. More times than not, they looked better in person.

  698. MoonPatrol says:

    By the way as for detail, these new LED HD TV s show almost too much information as I was watching Pirates of the Caribbean at the store on a big screen and J Depp and his woman were showing the pores in their skin and his scraggly beard. AHHH too close for me ! I like the natural filter of the movie screen..

  699. DC SB says:

    Taz, professional shots are fantastic, don’t mean to have made you paranoid. But from pots I talked with, the ones that come off as straight out of SI, Maxim, Playboy etc are the ones they steer clear from.
    Or ones that seem lifted from the pages of Vogue (even if the girl is legitimately the girl in the pics).
    I think it’s because professional pics gets a bad rep just like, Cdn mentioned, “model” “actress” “hostess” get. But some girls really ARE models, or actresses..

    Also, professional shots can come a number of ways, a la American Apparel for instance.

  700. sugarbarbie says:

    I tried taking pics all day…it was a mess. mom kept cutting off my head, it kept looking awkward, lighting was bad. I gave up. But then I got a text later on tonight that the people from the event got the pics on cd for me…yeah! Hopefully they are cute.

  701. MoonPatrol says:

    DC SB

    Lots of woman steal pictures of beautiful or just mildly healthy looking women . They then post them as themselves hoping a blind man will pour himself on to them an d maybe send them some money. Its happened to me but i have never sent money cause I can figure it 0ut pretty quick.

  702. lil'SB says:

    Ooo Cdn that sounds juicy…tell us now!

  703. DC SB says:

    Taz, I think the professional shots that a lot of SDs dislike are the ones yes, as Moon Patrol mentioned, girls in lingerie and high heels.. comes off as professional escort.
    I personally didn’t want to put up professional shots because I wanted to show what I look like in the daytime, little make-up.. then I don’t have to live up to photoshop.
    But that’s just 1 perspective..

    Also lots of people are bashing the camera pics, but uh.. I like cam pics because they’re about as nitty gritty sans photoshop you’re going to get. If a girl can look stunning in a camera pic you know she’s a natural beauty.

  704. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    To be honest though my ‘professional’ pics – I believe I am only wearing mascara as far as make up…I do think they look MORE like me than my snapshots that I am wearing make up in…

  705. MoonPatrol says:

    Lots of the Sb’s I’ve emailed tend to be dry on the pictures. I expect a decent show of good faith is to have a plethora of shots so I can see who I’m talking too. I’m sorry but I care about appearances and photos do a lot to make them more clear. I always provide a handlful of pics when I email. I think its part of the woman’s toolbadg to be able to give some images to a SD pot. ANd not all fuzzy dark ! there you GO!

  706. CdnGent says:

    DC – I mentioned that the other day also. Other telltale signs definitely include model, actress or (the best) hostess. Remind me to tell the blog sometime about the ring of waitresses that got busted by their employers in my neck of the woods after being discovered by their boss using a work computer to access the site. There was three of them. I actually met of them a month or so after they were all let go. Last summer, I found out they were also the reason a golf tournament was cancelled at a local golf course. Pros come in all sorts of disguises.

  707. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    Cdn – thanks and yes opinions vary – but I do find everyone’s opinion valuable as a different perspective :)

    DC – ya’ll have me paranoid lol…as I was when I first put the pics up :S I was assured by the sd’s/sb’s I showed (from the blog) that they weren’t ‘professional’/escort at all…ha…if it wasn’t hidden I would soo be posting my profile number/linking it again for feedback lol 😛

  708. DC SB says:

    Oh yes, and I agree w/ LilSB. I have tons of fakers roaming the world wide web from back in the day when I had a myspace. Damn myspace.

    So, some girls could be stealing pics and re-using them.
    Never understood what would possess someone to do that. Why?!

  709. MoonPatrol says:

    sugarbarbie
    I agree with NYGent
    Stay way from professional photographers. They will make you look like a playboy slut or worse! We men like to see what you look like in the real world and how you would appear from the other side of a coffee table!
    I have taken thousands of pictures and worked in photo labs. I rarely see “profesional portrait photographers” with remotely inspiring resume shots on their office walls. The concept of composition, the most important structural component of any visual art, is highly neglected or not comprehended by such “working Photographers” NOT all , But most I’ve seen. Take your own pIctures!

  710. DC SB says:

    oops, Cdn – I also agree professional shots seem to DETRACT the SDs.. mostly because I heard that’s a tale tell sign for pro escort.
    So is listing “model” or “actress” as a profession.. who knew.

    I, however, when I had a prof- had shots where I looked diff in every pic solely because depending on the day, I can be a completely different person. I just have a look that is very chameleon – so if I put 1 pic up w/ curly hair, sun kissed skin I might come off as Moroccan or hawaiian.. but if I show up with straight hair, paler from the winter I come off as Latina or Middle Eastern. And then I’d disappoint. So I think it’s cool to show some variety..

  711. CdnGent says:

    Hey Taz, don’t forget that my opinion is only that … MY opinion. Some professional shots are better done than others. I’m not looking for the glamour girl. If you get a decent photog who understands that it’s about finding the subjects CHARACTER rather than getting them to POSE a certain way, you’re probably doing fine. Problem with professional photography anymore is that digital has made EVERYONE a pro. Kinda annoying to those of us who actually studied the art.

  712. DC SB says:

    Elle, thank you =) I finally settled on a cropped version of something of me that I also feel is vague enough to not be recognizable.

    I guess when it comes to working out, I’ve been fortunately blessed to have a great set of genes & a metabolism that requires I eat MORE than the average person so that I don’t LOSE weight (it’s bizzare, dad is the same way) and so some women struggle to lose weight, but no one really talks about those of us who WISH we could have those set of curves off the bat, rather than throwing back protein shakes to add some booty.
    I guess the grass is always greener on the other side..

    Cdn

  713. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    To be honest with my photos I got advice from SD’s and SB’s that I spoke to off the blog through email :)

    I am a tad concerned now though if I ever need my profile again…after CDN’s comment…as my photos are more professional but definitely not fake :(

  714. CdnGent says:

    lil’SB … you’re giving someone WAY too much of the benefit of the doubt. Obviously the legs belong to SOMEONE but I don’t think it belongs to ANY of the women who’ve posted it as their profile pic. And beside, if the other two DID steal it from the first, who’s to say SHE didn’t steal it from somewhere else? I did think it was interesting that the woman I first saw it on was Canadian and the other two were American on two different sides of the country. I’d be quite curious to know how they found each other. I think that it’s just a pretty commonplace stock photo that they all found and thought would be a good lure.

  715. lil'SB says:

    Elle, I think we’ll all recognize you by your avatar and writing style anyways so I think you can change your name as soon as you want.

    Also, to CdnGent, maybe the photo of the legs WERE real, it’s just that OTHER SBs stole it from an original SB!

  716. Obviously DID NOT proofread above before posting. I’m horrible about doing that here.

  717. CdnGent says:

    Yes, well I believe I commented on poofbabies on the blog the other day. They are plentiful I assure you.

  718. cdn – you bring up something very interesting. I am all of a sudden receiving messages from SDs who receiving a link to my “poof daddy” article from SBs. I guess SBs who read the blog are sending the link out after the pot SD poofs, instead of writing their own!

    The SDs writing letters to me are requesting I write an article about “poof babies” and also abut the peeve you mentioned above about fake photos. I am getting a lot of great content ideas from SBs and SDs both.

  719. CdnGent says:

    Elle … my general thought would be that the thoughtful SBs on the blog are the exception and NOT the rule.

  720. cdn – I know of SBs who use alluring body part photos (legs, lips, breasts, etc.) that aren’t theirs, but they will state on the profile that the photos is not a photo of them, but that actual photos will be shared later. I cropped a photo of my own legs for one of my profile pics (when I had a profile), but I also shared the rest of the actual photo when the time came for photo swapping.

  721. CdnGent says:

    sugarbarbie … why would one of your potSDs lurking here be a problem? They’re here too, no? If anyone on the blog has an issue with you on the blog then they’re rather hypocritical and likely not worth your time.

    Anyway, if I was going to offer up any photo advice, I wouldn’t go the professional photo route at all. It’s totally unecessary first of all and secondly, it just looks WAY too staged for my liking. Others SDs may have completely different opinions on this of course, but I’d prefer my SB to have a more girl next door look. At the end of the day, a photo is only a benchmark. You can’t really know anything until you meet in person.

    Having said that, my general rules for photos would be:

    – similar quality across multiple photos. In other words, don’t post one that’s razor sharp, one that’s all pixelated and one that’s so tiny it was clearly taken with a phone. Everyone knows someone with a decent camera. Ask to borrow one if you don’t have one and learn how to use the self-timer. The result can be very casual and very attractive.

    – offer a few different ‘views’ but ensure some consistency across the board. I like to see that the smile is the same in each … or the hair colour … or the fashion. LOL! Gotta love the gals who include that photo that was taken during the big hair days of the 80s. Oh, the other thing I’d avoid is including photos that crop too tightly to the face (hmmm, what COULD they be hiding?) or any photo that might be interpreted as someone being a little too much of a party girl. What is it of photos of women in bars or at parties dressed ridiculously and clearly five drinks beyond the legal limit? LOL!

    – worst mistake that the young girls make include: revealing too much AND using fake pictures of various body parts. They’re always so willing to argue until you shut them up with a link to a page where the photo also appears. I’m assuming everyone here knows about the website that compares photos across the rest of the internet? Can yield some interesting result. The funniest example of this was a woman who really intrigued me because her profile photo was a VERY alluring pair of legs. Couldn’t find it online anywhere despite my best search. However, during the course of my expanding my SB search outward, i’ve seen no less than TWO other SBs using it as THEIR profile pic. BUSTED! Haha!

  722. sugarbarbie says:

    CdnGent I thought about posting pictures somewhere and asking for feedback from SB’s and SD’s alike, but then I thought what if on of the SD’s I’m after is a lurker on here….

  723. sugarbarbie says:

    Hola! Trying to catch up.
    I fasted for 21 days starting the new year. It was a spiritual cleanse and prayer. Super easy. Basically. no solids and no junk. So soup was good and juices, I made nut milk too which I added a meal replacement power (nutriveda) occassionaly some raw egg yolk. Anyway I wasn’t trying to lose weight but a few days after new years I saw my pictures….I didn’t like how I looked. Everybody said I looked great, but I thought not. Long story short i lost 20 lbs in 21 days.
    I was going to try the master cleanse but maple syrup isn’t raw…I bought some organic syrup but it still sits there… I always have a ton of lemons that’s the first thing I grab. Sea Salt, got it, distilled water yep, always….hmmmm maybe next week lol

  724. CdnGent says:

    Good evening all! Just saying hi. Tempted to chime in on DDDD’s rather interesting post or ask if anyone ever gets advice about photos from the SDs rather than each other. Just seems sometimes there’s a rather narrow focus here but that could just be me and my relatively new perspective. Anyway, hoping you’re all having a great evening. Ciao!

    CdnGent

  725. Flo Rida says:

    NYC SB – buy a scale! I got mine at some department store

    Lisa – yes if you eat lots and lots of celery it will even out chocolate (celery requires more calories to break down than celery contributes)

    Elle – I just do squats, press ups, burpees and running for cardio (which I can do anywhere) and then free weights moderate squats, light bench press and heavy leg press in the gym.

    Midwest – cleanse at work – just bring in a pitcher premade and sip during the day (btw I have never tried the cleanse but friends have)

    NewbieSB – r u a model?

    Methinks the whole of Canada is depressed at the hockey result! We’ll see if they can pull it off through the back door.

  726. How long should I wait before removing “(formerly ElegantSugar)” from my blog name. I feel like Prince. I need a symbol of some sort.

  727. DC – Aw, wish I could have been there. In time. Love the new avatar, hot lips. I used to be the same about no attention span with DVD work-outs, but I became addicted to them after seeing results.

  728. DC SB says:

    am I the only person with ZERO attention span for DVD work outs etc.?

  729. DC SB says:

    elle, hi doll. ps meant to say, read your latest entry & joseph sounds adorable indeed. =)

    oh, and VA, ESB & myself met up this weekend, and you eventually have to come join us –

  730. NYC SB says:

    CA – insanity is the post p90x work out… i hope its not the same… their regular work outs are insane to begin with

  731. mommapoppins says:

    Later CA

  732. CA Dreamin SB says:

    Hate to hit and run you guys, but wanted to say THANK YOU to everyone who sent birthday wishes my way! It was a good one :)

    I got a new work-out DVD set called Insanity. It looks amazing – can’t wait to get started!

    Catch up with you guys tomorrow! Luv ya!

  733. mommapoppins says:

    I picked it up from the herbal store. I guess I will give it a shot and let ya know what happens. Hopefully between these, my diet, and working out I can accomplish my goal!!!

  734. mommaP – I have heard of Lipozene (a diet pill), but not Lipodrene. Well, I have tried neither so I’m no help on this topic!

  735. If you ladies want a work-out that truly, truly works and you are unable to get P90x (which is one work-out I recommend), go to Target or *shudder* Wal-Mart (loathe that place) and buy the Danskin Now Kettlebell DVD workout. It is under $15. I bought the 5 lb. and 8lb. I saw results in a week. you only need 30 minutes a day. Add in a day or two of cardio. I am telling you, kettlebells are wonderful with fast results. It works out all the muscles in your body simultaneously. Add in a sensible diet, cut out carbs and desserts (as Flo said) and you will be in fabuloso shape. Trust me.

  736. mommapoppins says:

    Have any of you tried Lipodrene? If so how did it do for you?

  737. NYC SB says:

    Midwest -Ohhhh THAT! yeah kinda easy with my job… since i sit around all day

  738. mommapoppins says:

    Yeah!!!! USA won the game against Canada!!!

    Yall played a good game though

  739. Good points, DC. Hey, by the way.

    Hi mommaP.

  740. Midwest says:

    Let me rephrase the question…How do you manage the “cleansing” portion while at work. It strongly recommends having ready access to the facilities during the process. That just isn’t a reality in my world.

  741. NYC SB says:

    Midwest – I make enough for the whole day and then sip

  742. Midwest – if you read the info on the link, I provided, you will see that you are safely consuming enough calories while on the cleanse. We have just trained our bodies to think we are starving if we aren’t eating solid foods.

  743. For clarification, Newbie, I wasn’t at all questioning your self-confidence. You asked for advice on writing your pot SDs back and preceded that with your shock of their interest in you. My only advice was do not divulge the same thoughts you did with us to them. That’s all. Oh, and I’m no Vogue Cover model anymore. I’m an old hag. But to a Dorian Gray face-lifted elderly woman searching for her youth, I am the cat’s meow.

  744. DC SB says:

    Good evening everyone (seems to be mostly SBs) so ladies!

    Newbie – I would disagree that mainstream society and the du jour look is white/blonde/blue eyes/big boobs – I think that’s more like, what Playboy promotes. and the Real Housewives of Orange County. Other than that, beauty comes in so many sizes and colors..

    Men have all different sorts of tastes. Heidi Klum isn’t the ideal for every guy, at all. For some guys it’s Iman. For others it’s Salma Hayek.

  745. Lisa says:

    Good question Midwest

  746. Midwest says:

    How in the world do you do this cleansing while working a full-time job????

  747. mommapoppins says:

    hey all!

  748. NewbieSB says:

    LOL Elle, as i stated I am well aware of the fact that I am attractive. What I made was a simple observation: Mainstream society has an “ideal” and many men pay for it. Unlike you, some of us will never fit the “Vogue Cover Model” or that other popular look du jour (white, slim, blond, blue-eyed, and big boobed). I expressed how surprised I am that it doesnt matter as much as one would assume based on societal norms.

    From reading the blogs of other non-conventional-beauty SB’s, its safe to say this is a common observation (which I linked to from your blog—Kudos!). Nothing to do with “self confidence”. 😉

    Ahhh I have had a short brush with the dom/sub lifestyle so I am not entirely foreign to it. As I stated, its attractive to me—I enjoy both ends of it, actually.

    Anyway….let the SD search begin….

  749. NYC SB says:

    thanks Elle!

    Flo – in order to measure your weight in 2 lbs increments would require a scale… problem number 1 hahahaha

    have i mentioned how awesome this blog is

  750. Never mind. That doesn’t work.

  751. Oops. Forgot we couldn’t post links so my last comment is being moderated.

  752. Lisa says:

    so if I eat celery that will even out the calories in a box of chocolates?

  753. Flo Rida says:

    NYC – the key to maintaining weight is to measure it in 2lb increments and take corrective action immediately you cross the 2lb barrier – of course not having a demanding job is also a requirement.

    Lisa – didn’t you know chocolates are negative calories? Kidding actuallly celery is negative calories.

  754. Naughty Molly says:

    I don’t want the anorexic look either. I like my voluptuous body 😉

  755. NYC SB says:

    Flo – I’m not looking for the anorexic look… i just want to fit in my pants again :(

  756. Lisa says:

    ok I want to go for the anorexic look. Tell me the “safe” foods are chocolates, chips, fried fish, hamburgers, desserts, etc

  757. Lisa says:

    Yes being in walking distance to everything will be great. Jobwise, i’d like to have a better job, one where I could wear nice clothes instead of an ugly uniform (wearing a uniform is the biggest turn off of my job) but my skills are limited and I can’t handle stress and am horrible at multitasking. I had a job that required that, I failed horribly at it. I thought I was doing a good job but the boss didn’t. The reason I prefer retail is that I like to have free time during the week , days off when the stores aren’t crowded. An of course sd can only see me during the weekdays as he is married.

  758. Naughty Molly says:

    I’m jumping in for one second. it is also important to get regular physicals and check-ups too. If you eat a ballanced diet, exercise and you’re still having trouble losing weight please see your Dr.

    Okay, that’s enough mothering for tonight :)

  759. Flo Rida says:

    NYC SB and Elle – I have friends who swear by the cleanse and it works for them, I just work out like a mad woman and have given up dessert & chocolate and carbs.

    Lisa – try the cleanse – you can research it on internet.

    Midwest – in NY anorexic teen look is in

  760. NYC SB says:

    Elle – would love the list of safe foods if you find them

    Midwest – desperate times call for desperate measures… I have a trip to puerto rico coming up in 3 weeks, and then a bahamas make up in 5 and then vegas….

  761. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    Lisa – that sounds worse than high school :( Seriously – sweetie – look for a job that at least allows your human rights to be exercised…when you move into this place – start looking – the new year is still young! You are doing an awesome job with how far you have come :)

  762. Lisa – then it sounds like joining the gym across the street from your new place will be the best solution for you.

  763. Midwest says:

    Lisa – most gyms will offer a complimentary evaluation and exercise plan to get you started. They will show you what to use to get the results you seek.

  764. Midwest – I’m sorry I should not have said fasting as it is the absolute wrong term to use to explain the Master Cleanse. It’s more of a diet and detoxification process. I have a list of “safe” foods allowed if you feel like cheating while you are on MC. I will dig them up for you.

  765. Lisa says:

    I presume I could but I already have plenty to carry to work. I’d have to find one that would fit in my tiny locker as employee theft is a problem at work. We have few cameras and none in the breakroom. Back when we had a fridge, I had my lunch stolen and a few times someone opened my soda that was in a bag and drank part of it.

  766. Midwest says:

    edit *have NOT learned*

  767. Midwest says:

    Lisa – Can you get an insulated cooler and an ice pack? Then you can keep things cool until you need them. I’m guilty of letting McDs be my fallback in a rush, but I could do so much better if I brought lunch daily.

    NYC and Elle – I can see the benefit of cleansing, but have learned enough about it to be comfortable. Instead of fasting, can you have some type of soluble foods? Soups even?

  768. Lisa says:

    The heavy lifting doesn’t do anything but hurt my back. I have a lot of back pain when I work and my right leg has a slight cramp in it for several months. Only hurts on the days I work though.

    If I get to move to the new apartment, I was telling sd that I was thinking of getting a membership at the Bally’s total fitness place that is above the starbucks across from where my new apartment is. Since the neighborhood is safe and days are getting longer, that might be something I could do in the early evenings after work. I wouldn’t know which machines to use though.

  769. NYC SB – other than red wine, I was pretty good all weekend AND I worked out double time.

  770. Lisa – powdered protein shakes don’t need a refrigerator. Just bottled water and a shaker. Poor diet is the number reason people become (and stay) overweight. Lack of exercise is number two.

  771. Lisa – do you have time to work out? It sounds like you may need to change your diet. If you are already doing heavy lifting, you shouldn’t be over your ideal weight as muscle burns fat.

  772. Lisa says:

    Another issue I have is eating lunch at work. I can eat healthy at home but when I have my 15-30 minute lunch break which is usually around 1 pm when I work 8-3, I end up eating junk like cupcakes and fatty foods. The microwave and fridge in the breakroom broke months ago and management is not replacing them so I can’t bring anything from home that required the fridge or heating up. All my coworkers eat mcdonalds which is next door but then again most are overweight.

  773. NYC SB says:

    elle – we are all allowed to indulge… everything in m0deration right? im sure you worked it all off already

  774. NYC SB says:

    I think people gain the weight back because they go back to their old eating habits… I am off french fries… and after the cleanse I have a 1500 calorie in place that I plan to follow… so we will see what happens…

  775. ha ha ha. THAT above coming from someone who gorged at Waffle House and Johnny Rockets in the SAME week. Hey, I was depressed.