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Loading ...Sugar Babies and Sugar Daddies tend to have a love/hate relationship with the media. We need the media to thrive, and SeekingArrangement.com has been widely covered, with both positive and negative impressions left on audiences. Though we do our best to control the outcome of each segment or article that covers this website by attempting to cast only the best representation of the sugar world that we can, know that at the end of the day it is not up to us. There is only so much we can do to change the general perspective of what a sugar baby or a sugar daddy really is (or what it isn’t).
The thing to remember here is that the media is not usually interested in telling a story that has a happy ending. They want the dirty details. The controversy. They want the stereotypes. Sometimes, it doesn’t matter who we cast or what story is told, there will always be “experts” around to sway the perspective their way. So the overall public image of Sugar Babies and Sugar Daddies isn’t an accurate one, and more importantly, isn’t a positive one. It’s unfortunate really, because if you are a part of this world, you would know that having a little sugar, rarely has a negative impact on one’s life. But not everyone likes to see that perspective.
Some would wonder if the stigma placed on the sugar world has any negative affects on those who participate in it. More often than not, we struggle to cast with in the website because members are uncomfortable revealing their identities or talking openly about this lifestyle. The journalists and producers we work with see this as “shameful” behavior, but we know better. It has nothing to do with shame, but more of the ridicule they would likely receive when thrust into the spotlight. No one likes to be judged, whether they are proud of what they do or not. But does it stop there? Or are you harboring a secret life, or relationship, from everyone you know because of the stigma that has been initiated by the media?
One sugar baby is taking it upon herself to answer these questions, and find out the best way to overcome these obstacles. She is so passionate about this project, that she has taken it upon herself to dedicate her thesis and the next two years of grad school, to studying the adverse effects of media on sugar. If you are interested in helping her gather data and perspective on this subject, she is looking for volunteers. She is looking for people who are willing to share their experiences via phone or skype, and would love to have your valuable insight. We all know that not all sugar is created equal, and that many different stories can be told with in the sugar bowl. If you are interested in sharing yours please send in email to jennifer(at)seekingarrangement(dot)com for more information. If you want to help but are not interested in an interview, please click on the following link to participate in her survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/s/SM2QD8K.
How do you feel about the way sugar is portrayed in the media?
How has the stigma attached to sugar negatively impacted your life?
What has the media gotten right/wrong about sugar?
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All personalities and perspectives are welcome in the blog, while personal attacks and name calling are not. It’s inevitable that there will be disagreements but let’s handle it as mature adults with class to keep the dialog constructive and respectful. Please refer to the “Blog Etiquette” for more details. For the newbies, please take a look at the “Sugar Daddy Dating Tips” section on the right for a list of commonly discussed topics and the “SD and SB Blog List” section to see the perspective of other sugars. Now comment away and let’s enjoy the blog!!
How do you feel about the way sugar is portrayed in the media? Well…sex sells and the media will always put a negative spin on sugar. The funny part is that I believe it’s highly likely that many TV and movie celebs have had some adventure in sugarland.
How has the stigma attached to sugar negatively impacted your life? Very little except that during a small blog meet we had someone who was not invited show up and start asking personal questions. We felt she might have been someone from the press and it put a damper on the gathering for a little while. I also won’t attend the SA parties. The unfortunate part about how sugar is portrayed is that it keeps people like me more secretive about this life with the exception of a few people.
What has the media gotten right/wrong about sugar? Mostly that they insist on comparing it to other professions in order to sensationalize it. They also focus on the 5+ figure SB rather than sharing the other types of SBs (gift, travel, etc). The most recent interview that was shared in the blog a few months back actually did touch on goals, relationships (relangements) and other aspects of sugar and the pitfalls that can come with sugar.
Sure, media boys have misstresses too
And media ladies … (I am going to be rude now, skipthe post) biotches just jelouse !!!
They cannot accept HOW men spend on sugar a lot to have sex, while nobody want to have sex with them without any sugar. Some woman don’t have sex for 5-7 years and here come two blondes to the studio and telling about theirpresents, travels and benefits –
I am surprised why biotches did not put them in SalemBigFire !
HUGE THANKS to theese little and feminine women who so BRAVE to go at media tv-shows !!!
About feministic moods in US.
It is my free choice to be sugarbabe, I am sucsessful in carreer, but I enjoy swim in sugar.
To feel myself adorable, sexy, appreciated. To feel myself WOMAN.
Same as to be housewife, coz I enjoy it, and I am perfect in it. I don’t want run away from my family to work like most women want. Nunny ? Kids must hear 3500 new words per week for good brain development and only mother will chat all the day to a child … nunny don’t care, she can feed and be perfect nunny but she not going to speak to someones child 3500 words.
In Russia we already achieve man’s professions (including hard phisical jobs) during Soviet times, now we are fighting for not to do it anymore.
I didn’t go to kindergarden, and haven’t childs decease. Never.
We have organisations ”Save the whales”, ”Save the Amasonka rainforests”, ”Save homeless dogs”. Why not create ”Save the biotches” with some volunteering attractive young males. Why we treet our women worse then dogs ???
From previous blog…
@Treasured
“I just left my Sugardaddy… My ex SD was requiring monogamy from me. And was swearing he is monogamous to me.”
I’m sorry to hear what happened. When someone requires monogamy you’d expect that it would be reciprocated. To find out otherwise can be very disappointing. You had wrote about your sugar relationships in two previous posts, this one from 3 weeks ago about it coming to an end, and this one back in August about juggling multiple ones. I’m just wondering how does what just happened to you relate to what you wrote previously?
@Jezebel
“I figured I’d find a guy I could tolerate seeing once a week, or a few times a month, and that would be that. Instead, I found a man that treats me like gold…”
Thanks for sharing your experience. I hope that most SB’s would want to find a great SD to spend time with, not just someone they can “tolerate”. You sound surprised to find such a great SD, but I’d suggest that you should not lower your expectations. Having said that, it’s important to openly discuss the feelings you have for each other and come to an agreement on what type of relationship you both want to have. Whether it’s NSA or something more, as long as the two of you can agree on it then that’s all that matters. Good luck!
Re: The blog topic
I’ve written several reviews of media coverage in the past. You can see them here (ABC), here (HuffPo), here (MTV), and here (Swift Justice).
@Guru & Midwest – I miss you guys!
How do you feel about the way sugar is portrayed in the media?
I’m out of the bowl but i’ve received consistent feedback from my SB friends that the quality has drastically declined due to media coverage over the last year. There has been an influx of new users which are great for SAs valuation, but make it difficult for higher caliber SDs and SBs to find each other. I think that the portion of the bowl represented in the media might scare away some of the other potential users. Most of the SBs i’ve befriended are educated, accomplished, bright and charming – nothing like the women selected to represent us on television. It’s interesting to me that high end call girls are represented in a glamourous light while SBs tend to come across as trashy and unscrupulous.
How has the stigma attached to sugar negatively impacted your life?
I always dated successful men and didn’t date married SDs, so no one would blink an eye if I had a new man in my life. Of the few people I admitted it to, my best friend had the hardest time understanding it. Once I fully explained, she not only understood but thought it was a smart option given my ambitions and lifestyle. I wouldn’t give most people the chance to judge me because I preferred that my private life remain that way.
This is an incredibly interesting topic. I also think that it’s difficult for people to answer honestly since many people enjoy publicly denouncing others which helps the denouncer to improve his or her own standing: “I would never….”
I think that the media does negatively influence the reality of being a SB but that’s par for the course in any of the sectors in life: crime, politics, etc. It’s not only the media that puts a negative spin on SBs but other women and men as well.
I think that what people are willing to admit in public and what they actually do behind closed doors are two different things. It’s easy to act all indignant in the public sphere with regards to the mistress, sugar-baby, trophy wife, gold-digger, well-married woman, or May-December relationships etc. but when it comes down to the basics it’s influenced by the biological imperative. Woman are attracted to the fittest, richest, smartest men out there who are capable of taking care of the SB and their offspring and men are looking for the healthiest, youngest looking women out there who will provide healthy babies. And yes, nowadays, we are influenced less by the biological imperative and have become more of a cultural animal but when it comes right down to it, not much has changed. We want love to persist in a relationship but it usually domes down to the nitty-gritty: does he pay the bills, can he repair the broken stuff, and can he clean a toilet? If he never has money, doesn’t help to fluff up the nest (whether by his own hands or hiring a handy-man) and doesn’t do his share of housework than chances are the love’s going to fizz out and the relationship will end-up in divorce. Not many people are willing to put up with a one-sided relationship regardless of how much you love him/her!
How else does the general public endorse the negative image of women choosing men for financial security? Many women buy into the Prince Charming fairy tale. He loves me so much and he would never cheat on me. And, look at the thousands that are spent on the wedding that proclaims the beginning of ever-lasting true-love. When, in reality, many marriages end in divorce of and if they do stay married: infidelity and/or friction. Oh yes, there are exceptions, marriages or relationships that work but those are not the rule.
Statistically, more couples argue or separate or divorce because of money problems. I’ve had a relationship fall apart because of money. My ex-husband was a musician and never had any financial stability. Oh, he was a lot of fun but when it came right down to it raising a child with him was disastrous. Not an ideal situation.
I have become attracted to powerful men who are successful and capable of spoiling me. They also tend to be older than I since the men of my age are usually attracted to women who are 10 to 20 years my junior. I am 46. Older, successful men attract me because I am tired of men who are weak, indecisive, broke, and who are looking for a mother to do his laundry. I want to be desired and I want a man who is capable of bringing home the bacon! Do I want love? I have had it and it’s really not all it’s cracked up to be. I get love from my children, my family and my friends. I want great sex, good conversation, kindness, laughter and financial stability from a man! Can I exclaim this in public? Certainly not, people would react with fervor to that. She doesn’t believe in love! She’s shallow! She’s a gold-digger! She’s not feminine and gentle, and unassuming like a real woman! “Gasp!” She’s inherently evil! And, like RussianSB said, “they would burn us at the stake!”
It’s difficult to admit in public that yes, I shopped around for the best arrangement but how different is that when friends meet and compare houses, engagement rings, and vacations. How we do admire a friend who has married well. And, not so long ago, we had little say in the choice of a marriage partner. It was made by the members of our family and the local matchmaker who would base their choice on the ability of the partner to provide for you and your children, as befits your station. They would also look at the character and the families of both potential marriage partners. This is not anything different than the trophy-wife, the mistress, the sugar-baby.
SBs also add to the negative image. It’s easier to stand on the pulpit and declare, “I don’t prostitute myself”, I’m more ethical than an escort” or if you have chosen a man because of his wallet rather than for love, it’s much easier to say that I only do it with men that I like and never with a married man. We are always trying to qualify how we are not really what you think we are.
Yes, this blog entry is long and most will not read it but for those who do, this is just my personal opinion and, therefore, not necessarily right. It is what it is!
OK! Sorry, about the ranting and raving! I sound like some kind of bitter harridan.
I found the site because of some of those online media reports. When my domestic situation changed I decided to try it out. While nothing has really worked out 100% for me, I have met people and had a good time and stuck to my end of the deal, and they held to theirs (mostly
)
@twiceshy I, too, came to the site because of a media report. The report was not positive but I was intrigued, nonetheless. I have met some very interestingt people, as well. I met with one man who was not for me but I know that there are many people out there just like me who are not satisfied with the traditional route and are looking for something different! It’s all very exciting!
And, good luck with your search. You sound like a man with lots of integrity and the SB who snags you will be very fortunate!
Sassyteacher
Hi to all,
Just wanted to elaborate a little on my comment that SBs also contribute to their negative image. Yes, some of you are groaning at my long-winded diatribes today. Sorry! In my opinion, we are not all that different from the working-girls on the street, the escorts and the high-priced call-girls. We are all essentially exchanging ourselves/time for money. Yes, the contexts are different, the relationships are different and the personal ethics and personalities of the individual people are different. The intelligent girls blessed with a pretty face and a sexy body are fortunate to be able to be SBs or high-priced call girls since not many successful men would be willing to develop a relationship with an unattractive girl nor spend anywhere from $1,000 to $10,000 per month on them either. I’m just saying that when we diss the prostitutes and the escorts, it also reflects on us since we are all essentially exchanging something for money. Don’t forget that the general public paints us all with the brush. And, no I am not a working-girl, I am a high-school teacher but I am very open-minded and, I like to think, tolerant.
Don’t forget to be kind to all…
sassyteacher
Hey Ya’ll,
I couldn’t find another place to post something here, so I’m sorry if this is off topic. Any experienced SB want to be my mentor? I’m BRAND new to this, and in general haven’t excelled at normal dating (lol) so I just want to be sure I’m giving this a fair shot and follow someone’s guidance who knows the ground rules.
Any help is appreciated
@sassy
I fully agree with you… nothing annoys me more than when SBs try to put down sex-workers and act like what they do is so different and incomparable.
I don’t think it is.
And as Midwest has pointed out, it’s pretty much hopeless to expect a realistic / fair portrayal of the sugar world in the media.
It’s much easier (and better for ratings I assume) to sensationalize it and play up the “is it prostitution” angle.
Crumbs, it makes you think what hope is there for an older and married SB?
The media will always go for “the story”.
But we have to remain positive.
One classy SB from the UK
X
Ahhh, the “media” controversy. Here’s what I think about the media: The Media is the most notorious and prolific hustler in the world! The Media makes exorbiant amounts of money by taking the things that people find pleasurable in life and making them seem evil. HOWEVER, there is an upside to their futile attempt at thwarting us humans from pleasure seeking activity – by simply exposing us to these ‘immoral’ deeds they 1) Alert us to the fact that these things are actually happening. 2) Exposure therapy. The more that we are exposed to these ideas, the more they become acceptable. I will use myself as an example…Let’s rewind back to the Spitzer scandal in 2008. At that time, I was recently graduated from college and about 4 years along on my formal career path via internships, and 1.5 years along in my first job out of college. When I saw the breaking news on CNN, my naive deer-in-the-headlights response was, “Holy sh!t. People DO these things?!” Then, I see the picture of Ashley Dupree. Normal looking girl, nothing especially striking about her. And I think, “Well, I’m prettier than her.” (Typical woman.) THEN, I see an expose on sugardaddie.com. My eyes widen in disbelief! “What the heck is THAT?!” BUT THEN … the wheels start turning in my head, “Wait a minute, do you mean to tell me that some average looking girl is getting scooped up by affluent men and having the time of her life? Wait, err, I’m prettier than her. If she can do all those fun things then whats to stop me from having the time of my life?” (Well, obviously not my scruples. Lol. Albeit existent, my scruples don’t exactly correlate with what society believes they should be. But I digress.) Long tory short, I never ended up joining sugardaddie.com because, after some frank conversations with both male and female friends, they said that the site was “dirty” “tacky” “not classy” and that they had bad experiences with the caliber of people they met on the site. Eventually, I found out about SeekingArrangement. Now, I come from a very traditional, conservative, upstanding family. Never broke the rules, never got into trouble, got good grades, obeyed my parents, clean record my whole life aside from a speeding ticket for going 5mph over the speed limit when I was 18. It took A LOT for me to think that it was “ok” to join a website like this. But eventually, I gathered up enough moxie to create a profile and join SeekingArrangement. It’s the only website of this nature that I am on and I don’t really feel the need to look elsewhere. My experiences with the people I have met from this site (minus a few dum-dums) have really added value to my life. And if it wasn’t for the media trying to portray this lifestyle in a negative light, I, ‘normal girl’, never would have joined because I never knew that these things existed in the first place. So, I guess all I have to say to the Media is a big “Thank You!” if it weren’t for you, Media, I would have continued to rot away in my cubicle while my life flew by me because I didn’t know there was so much more out there for me to enjoy.
…Also, forget about the fact that Ashley Dupree was an escort. Thats not the point.
It’ll be fine. The people that are looking for sugar will find it, even in the face of bad media. In fact, it works pretty well with human nature. I will bet there were several women that started looking for the site specifically based on the tv court case involving 2 sb’s and an sd. (Judge Glass?) Brandon made an appearance during the show and got railroaded. The sb’s and sd’s got reprimanded. Horrible publicity, but it meant more knowledge for women out there that didn’t know about this lil sugar outlet. Bad publicity just works for certain facets of our society.
I just created a new profile at SA.
And ! lucky me ! Already got interesting offers.
Guru, I know you , for your study/research in SM stuff.
One guy wrote me at SA:
”
I enjoy so many thinfgs. All kinds of impact play You getting spanked, flogged paddled etc but we can moderate that if youa re not too much into pain
I have a thing for physical punishment so squats jumping jacks ( naked of course
)
Humiliation like using you as my foot stool , kissing my feet etc
Really silly stuff ( think japanese game shows )like making you push a coin across the floor using your nose while you have a piece of ice clenched between your butt cheeks ( I know right
)
or trying to write your name on a whiteboard with a marker pen while pen is in your ass
oral worship of my balls penis and rimming (optional )
In general you obeying me
ooh and like predicament bondage
jumping to it when I say so
I could go on and on
“
I was thinking … may be feminism is Not such a bad thing
…..Oh my……Just when I think I have a grasp on the realm of human kinks, something else makes me raise my eyebrows and tilt my head in surprise.
Content, really?
where is my green smilik.
submissive guys write very ! interesting letters/offers too.
I usually just delete unpleasant letters right away, I have to start saving them for fun (and Guru’ studies
Wow, ILWCG, you have quite the imagination
Good idea, ILWCG. I had better start saving these e-mails, as well. I will use them to compile a very entertaining stand-up routine which I will perform for my nearest and dearest … after a few tequila shots.
@ILWCG
I don’t think that is exactly how women were treated before the feminist movement.
TequilaSD – “I don’t think that is exactly how women were treated before the feminist movement.”
I wasn’t alive at that time. Were you? Why is it that you think they were not exactly treated that way before the feminist movement? I honestly don’t know what you mean.
….according to wikipedia, guys have been into getting spanked by women since the dark ages. I think I missed the point.
TequilaSD.
You are too funny.
Yes, I sounded strange
I am sure women were not treated this way before the feministic movement … although… who knows.
(it is just I read these yesterday ‘ “anti feminism ” posts from RussianSB.
)
@Ellen
Silly me, The women that lived in that time probably just left the part out about taking notes with their ass pencils, and how the only jobs they could get were as furniture. That’s where “gentle”-man came from? The guy that would “gently” put his feet up on her, or would “gently” shove the pen up her ass before giving her the grocery list?
@Ellen
And by the way, we’re still in a feminist movement. Some women want to be able to do more, some women want men to do more.
@ILWCG
Fem is a double-edged blade. If I open a door for a lady, will she feel I’m being chauvanistic or sexist? If I tell same lady “Get your own door, bitch, you’re not an invalid.”, does that simply mean I’m being a dick or am I letting her exercise her rights of equality to be kicked in the privates like any male?
Who is the WE in we need media. Certainly not the regulars here, the customers who have chunked down their cash month after month.
My guess is at the. Media has also driven a number of the true sb’s underground. its flooded the site with 18-23 year olds and industrial debutantes-the former just fishing and the latter thinking of this as a cheaper way to advertise
@Flyer
The only consolation in my constant optimism is that these two factions are well suited for each other.
@Flyer
If the 18-23′s were men of course…baby Sd’s maybe…aw screw it.
Tequila SD: I guess I just dont see the correlation between fetishism and feminism. Politics during sex?! Politics isn’t sexy (to me), fetishes are sexy. When people like kinky stuff I just figure “Hey, thats what they like.” And take it for what it is. Personally, I’m not into the super kinky stuff, but I would try it if my partner liked it. Not because of some power struggle nonsense – but out of love because I would want to please them. I think they would do the same fro me, within their own parameters.
Yes, Flyer, I too think the media drives good sbs underground.
Ah, Im rambling. Nite Nite.
@ILWCG
Fem is a double-edged blade. If I open a door for a lady, will she feel I’m being chauvanistic or sexist…
That is a simple Q.
Depend who you are, what you are wearing and how good you smell.
For example .
If I am wearing a short skirt and a road worker/cab driver whistles and says “that is a nice skirt”.
- it is definatly a sexism, and a girl gets offended .
If I am wearing the same skirt and a handsome, well groomed male MD in a hospital elevator whistles and says “that is a nice skirt” – it is a compliment, he is a knight and it makes my day.
- easy
I do not see any double edged blades 
)
@Guru
I fully stand by my words
This was the one, who tactically informed that he is leaving me after two months anyways, since he CAN’T afford a sugar relationship anymore. But is happy to keep me is his lover for free. Apparently he couldn’t afford it with me. But can do perfectly so with other girls:D LOL So, I left first.
And as for having at least two on call. I texted my other admirer (who was fully informed about that relationship, since he did fuck up in the past as well) and immediately got an invitation to see him (he lives in the other country). So, after a short travelling (next day after I left the first one), I am enjoying my time with an old friend.
And, of course, I keep in contact with a couple possible ones as well.
I think, until men learn to DELIVER, keep promises and not lie, I have no other options, as to lie and be a big bitch myself.
What I AM worried, is that all this Sugar experience will kill my trust in men all together. Will I ever be able to trust a man for real life relationship? I am starting to doubt it. Men, who cheat on their wifes, men who cheat on their girlfriends, men who have flocks of girls, men, who have been married for 1.5 years, and the wife is a beauty, men who have a small child… They all are on here…. The whole lot.
@I Love West Coast Girl… nobody ever send such letters to me
And never I get pin…s pictures 
Send me, someone , please !!!
I am not anti feminist, I said we are already feministic – Soviet Union made man and woman really equal. We did go all the way… and now, woman don’t want build(and I talk not about engineering part, you know) railroads anymore . And I am not judjing women, who don’t want to stay at home, closed in four walls, going crazy from own kids. But why theese woman judjing me ?? It is my free choise (meninism also) to be kept woman all well-married woman and stay in four walls, becose I really enjoy it, notbecose my man decide so.
oops, not meminism – feminism
Being SB , recieving valuable gifts from man it is also feministic choice. It is not feministic if life sircumstanses push you to that point, but if it is you shosen lifestyle – it is country which famous for it’s freedom (I mean US, not Russia). For example I never have banking loans and my tuition was free.
@Treasured
“What I AM worried, is that all this Sugar experience will kill my trust in men all together.”
Thanks for clarifying your situation. It’s been known that all men are pigs and all women are angels, so I don’t think you’re making a new discovery here!
@ILWCG
“Guru, I know you, for your study/research in SM stuff.”
There must be something in your profile to attract all these BDSM worshippers! What’s your secret?
@EllenSugarB
“A while back, SDGuru gave me some sound advice: “Set healthy emotional boundaries.”
I’ve preached various versions of that line to anyone who wants to hear and I think it’s one of the keys to have a postivie experience in the sugar world. Thanks for listening!
Treasured – “What I AM worried, is that all this Sugar experience will kill my trust in men all together. Will I ever be able to trust a man for real life relationship? I am starting to doubt it. Men, who cheat on their wifes, men who cheat on their girlfriends, men who have flocks of girls, men, who have been married for 1.5 years, and the wife is a beauty, men who have a small child… They all are on here…. The whole lot.”
I’m glad you brought this up because it’s something I’ve been thinking of, too. I’ve come to the realization that all (ok, the majority) of men cheat. I thought this was far before I got involved in Sugar. I just accept it as reality. then when I tell IRL boyfriends this they freak out and say, “No that’s not true.” I say, “Uh huh, ok…just wait until you get sick of boom boom with me after 10 years (or 1 year, who knows). I would just prefer that they tell me the truth and be done it. I say “I don’t care who you f, just be honest about it. I WILL find out, and I will be offended that you thought you were slick enough to deceive me and get away with it (silly child) I will not be so upset if you say, “Honey, I’d like to sleep with someone else. What do you think about that?”
Sorry that you had this happen to you, treasured. I’ve had it happen to me, too. Just like you, with a man who insisted on monogamy. Hypocrite! Whatever, I said “NO” to monogamy out of the gate and maintained that position. “I don’t care who you sleep with. I care about how you treat ME. That’s it. Oh, and use protection, sum-dum.”
Treasured, I applaud your reaction. Color me slutty, but the best way to get over a man is to get under another (better) one.
Good Luck!
@Tresured, problem is not that your trust in men will be killed (sure it will be !),
? Mamma (or nunny) never told you that all men want only one thing from woman ??
problem is why you have that trust from the begining
By the way, woman want all the things but from one man.
Simple conflict of interests ! It is war… baby… Nobody trust, it is why prin-up was invented. And Sugar dating not different from any dating, just grow the balls, dear.
And, yes, you are not unique, everybody deal with such situations, even miss Universe
@Tequila , mail exchange not take place
To open door is a rourtesy and also way to be polite. Meneging a restorant I open door a lot to young cute man-waiters (with loaded trays) . And how you going to call that, Tequila ? Femdom ? I also can hire and fire them. Does it make me a bad meneger if I use my little power and push one of themhave sex with me ? No… coz they just dream about that, they are young and I have D cup . And I still looking for SD ???
Yes, I am definetly not feminist, whom I am lying to ? And if one day I will meet a man (never met such before) who not open door for me, I simply will not be able to come inside ! And to come at all !
To open doors is a courtesy, not rourtesy
Tequila, emai exchange going GOOD !
My pot SD is on vacation back to square one *sighs*
I personally haven’t seen any media publications on SB/SD dating here in London, UK
@RussianSB “Does it make me a bad meneger if I use my little power and push one of them have sex with me ? No… coz they just dream about that, they are young and I have D cup”
0_0
And in general, I’m seeing a lot of SD bashing going on here
What about the scheming SBs that take plane tickets and visa assistance and never get on the airplane? Or begin to use the SD like an ATM machine with one contrived “emergency” after the next?
I’m not aware that Monogamy is necessarily a feature of a SD-SB relationship. Why would that need to be the case as long as both parties continue fulfilling their arrangement? If an SD wants different SBs what would be the issue? And similarly if a SB wants more than one SD?
Isn’t Monogamy a construct of a traditional Marriage and relationships rather than an Arrangement?
If you have two people who are committed to each other to that extent, then why don’t they drop the “arrangement” and have a regular relationship?
I surmise that it would turn an Arrangement into what is essentially a Long Distance Relationship with one party receiving an allowance (I’m paying for my girlfriend to go to college type of thing). And if the parties live in the same town, it makes it even more difficult for me to rationalise.
What I’m understanding from all the posts, especially from the SBs, is that emotions, connections and “strings” cannot be separated in SD-SB relationships.
Strong emotional bonds are formed, and in many instances are not respected or admitted.
As for those that say “All men cheat” , I was in a committed relationship (for which I probably should have been committed myself) for 10 years and I did not once cheat. So not “all” men do it, nor do “all” women do it. There are people that can be in committed relationships with one person even when it turns out to not be the “right” person.
@ Twiceshy if you buy someone tickets, you make them NON-REFUNDABLE.
And any visa cost no more then 100$. When I fly I also spend some 300 $ on travel expenses – taxi to and from airport,visa etc. but I never bother potential SD with such trifles.
Guru .
In my previous (spring profile) I had a picture – in black corset . The fun part was that regular guys would write me kind of “submissive ” letters. And I would read their profiles and nothing indicates he is a sub. I would ask why he write that strange and “I see your pic in black leather looking corset , so I thought you are a Dominatrix”.
now I do not have any lingerie pic in my profile.
but I do love corsets and owe a few
Guru you know my area and you know how I look – it would be very easy for you to look up my profile and decide for yourself why it is drawing kinky guys .
Russian.
I do not have any penis pictures right now.
)
When I get some, I will send them your way
Exlusivity !!!!!!!!
Boys, will you agree with me?
I came only to one conclusion here. SD can have as many SB as he can afford. Doesn’t mean he want it. But he can, ladies, he did work hard for that. SB can have only one SD,
if she want to see other SDs, or have boyfriend she will lose sugar. Man spending 3-10k per month on woman can be jelous ? He can, doesn’t mean he will be jelous, but he can
So, Sugar relationship IS exlusive even more then regular relationship.
Do I want to know that my man cheating me, do I want him to be honest with me ? No way ! What I supposed to do ? Be happy that he have grate sex with someone ? I don’t want to know details. And if he is gentelmen, he will do it smart not fo arrose my sick imagination and suspiction
Wow…testy but interesting convo going on here. As an SD, I agree with Guru that all men are dogs. One of my favorite descriptions of Bill Clinton by an Arkansas State Trooper…”He always was a hard dog to keep on the porch.”
I am married, my pot SBs know that up front. My wife knows that I may occasionally play around when she’s not around. My pot SBs know that i only play for limited periods. I love my wife dearly, she knows that, and any pot SB knows that. I’ve been directly busted twice–my wife was pissed off primarily by the fact that I was indiscreet enough to let her find out and let it get in the way of our relationship.
Guys can be different. I have 5 very close friends I’ve been brother close too since childhood–all have been married or in long-term committed relationships. Of these, only one has been entirely faithful, and I don’t anticipate he ever would cheat. 2 others have had only a little fling or two (that I’m aware of). 2 (including myself) have had serial infidelities.
Usually
If you and your SD agree to exclusivity – it means ! no condoms. that is why it is a big problem if a SB got to know he had other SBs.
Or he says he has financial problem, so this month you are together but No sugar (financial support ) and then a SB discovers he had other SBs this month and invested $$$$ in them.
How does it make aSB (treasured) feel ? like she was used and cheated.
I do not like this double standards , RussianSB. like he can cheat, lie, has other SBs just coz he has all the money, he is “paying” thousands , I feel it is disrespectful to his SB.
but life is not just black and white (even grey has 50 shades
, there are many different cases 
as long as both are happy and having fun.
…I did not say “all”, i said “most” men cheat. Ya, so what? Just don’t be a liar. I am more insulted by the fact that they think they are slick enough to try to deceive me – AND FAIL! Or maybe it’s just the failure in general that I find unattractive. Whatever.
No SD bashing from me!!! – I LOVE LOVE LOVE the men I have met from this sight. I hope to marry someone like them some day. (Cheating, eh whatever, if it’s just about sex then it’s just about sex. But no ‘love affair’ and no lies and deception. If you know my history, you know I 86-ed my long term SD because he started talking “love’ and ‘divorce’ – and I don’t want to be a home wrecker so I was outta there asap!)
And I repeat — NO SD BASHING from me! I’m a sugar lover/goal digger. I just don’t like liars. Sd or IRL.
Treasured’s SD made a futile effort to ‘play’ her and she called him out. End of story. Next!
twiceshy got scammed, too. not fun. you’re not an atm or an emergency rescue security blanket. steer clear of the highly-problematic women. unless, of course, you love the drama. but i doubt it.
@I LoveWestCoastGirl “If you and your SD agree to exclusivity – it means ! no condoms. that is why it is a big problem if a SB got to know he had other SBs.
Or he says he has financial problem,so this month you are together but No sugar (financial support ) and then a SB discovers he had other SBs this month and invested $$$$ in them.”
Oh. Ok…I had not thought about those issues. Yes in that case it does matter, and it makes sense that Monogamy can be a factor in a SD-SB relationship when those additional considerations are present.
@RussianSB
I’m also understanding, if not 100% agreeing with, the idea that the SD sets the rules because he has the gold.
He Who Has The Gold, Makes The Rules.
It’s a mercantile view of the arrangement, but when one stops to consider, it is probably an accurate depiction for many of these relationships. It would also explain why they last 3 to 4 months normally.
@VASD “Of these, only one has been entirely faithful, and I don’t anticipate he ever would cheat. 2 others have had only a little fling or two (that I’m aware of). 2 (including myself) have had serial infidelities.”
So it isn’t impossible to find, it’s just rare. In general cheating with a little fling or two over the course of a relationship appears to be more normal.
What would be curious is if SBs find these same issues when dealing with Sugar Mommys.
Nobody like doubke standarts, exept people who invent them
sorry,double standarts
@Guru – Oh, my dear, but I do admit that I am a heartless bitch. Was I like that to start with? Absolutely not. But, as the Russian SB said – I had to “grow balls”
I would ay, that absolutely NOTHING in the sugar relationship can surprise me anymore. And, guess I am a big girl.
As to double standards. Absolutely. Who pays can order the music. But I just hate lying. it is not about setting the rules, it is about lying about those. Hw can I play fair when the rules are unclear
As to why men cheat. Especially rich men? Why do the dogs lick their balls? Simply because they can. And nothing in the world would change it. No matter how amazing is the woman next to them.
But, on the good note. I still LOVE, LOVE, LOVE men. But, I have learned to accept them as they are and NOT fall in love. Ever. Enjoy the company, what they give me, sex, gifts and adoration. But never open your heart completely.
And, on one hand it makes me really sad. The realisation that there will not be “falling in love” for me. Unless someone really special will come along.
@Ellen – Thank you
Mwaah
Hi everyone!
Long time blog reader, first time poster. Hope everyone is having a good Wednesday!
@RussianSB — I love your posts, agree with you most of the time (I’m Russian too, well, half-Russian & moved to Texas when I was a kid). However, in my sugar experience I disagree with what you said about exclusivity, but that’s because maybe my situation is atypical of what most people here have shared. As a SB, I have more than one SD & even had a long-distance boyfriend as well, so SDs and SBs can see multiple people and I don’t see it as arousing anyone’s jealousy or anything. Since both lead separate lives, how would SD know whether you have a boyfriend or another SD? Is the exclusivity just a demand not to use protection as someone else has mentioned? I just don’t ever agree doing that with anyone and have always used it even with my long-term boyfriends when we agreed to be monogamous. Better safe than sorry. Again, in my experience I never had anyone demand or make a big deal out of exclusivity in sugar because as an interpreter I travel for work a lot, mostly to Europe while working on my last degree in Texas, so I’m not locally available to anyone for long. I work for FIFA and UEFA, so my schedule revolves around football (soccer), so I’m not around one place for long & in my situation it’s easier to have a SD in Texas and another in Europe. Both know I travel so much that meeting and being involved with other people is so prevalent in my line of work, so no one ever demands exclusivity or monogamy, just because it’s so unfeasible in my situation. Moreover, being around world-class footballers, it’s very unreasonable since so many options are constantly available and if any SD makes that exclusivity demand, I can easily walk away and have so much other options available for fun & sugar until I meet another SD. Again, I’m just trying to point out that the exclusivity is not a must for all SBs and some in my situation have to have more than one due to work & travel requirements that come with it because we’re not locally to one specific area for long (especially now that Champions League started and world cup qualifiers will pick up again next spring). I don’t know how many people can relate, but that’s just my experience.
@Ellen
It was fetishism in ILWCG’s post not feminism, as you have already guessed. But she was making it kind of like a joke, as though all women pre-feminist movement endured such activity as the norm…or at least that’s what I gathered. Which prompted me to state the obvious, that I don’t think that’s the activity that prompted the feminist movement.
@RussianSB
Exchange went through. You have mail. I’ll make some more suggestions as I hear back from you. Also, if you used your manager power to sleep with waiters, it is wrong. If you used your D cup to sleep with waiters, great. On another note, I thought most women didn’t like getting penis pics in their profile email. I’ve only sent one such pic in my life, and I can’t tell you the heartache that woman piled on me. Maybe it was a coincidence, but I will be VERY cautious with my heart and penis pics.
@ILWCG
Double standards are everywhere. What makes a complaint? Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Anger for the construction worker, but if he was the head of the company, cleaned up well, and hit all of your sugar buttons, you would quickly forget that he’s just a construction worker at heart. Human nature is just a way of saying we’re still animals at heart.
All of life is a double standard, because everyone is about themselves when it comes to something.
Those of you that try to ignore the power struggle are still afraid of being powerless. I laugh every time I see a profile on here that says “it’s not about the money. I just want to meet someone nice.” As if there ever was a shortage of nice broke guys.
All of you real SugarMomma’s that aren’t setting the gold rules to your advantage, well, you could. And if you’re a male SB that thinks your penis alone is going to dominate that woman, be ready for reality when it hits.
Easier to recognize it and see it for what it really is. Money, sex, and power will probably always go hand in hand. Almost everyone’s goal is set up a great arrangement that will carry you and your children through life. Some ways are easier than others. For you men, most of you will bust your ass for it, invest it, invent it, or win it. These are actually the easy ways for you. You are less likely to marry into it, sugarbaby into it, or end up raising the children of some super rich heiress while she jet-sets around the world. And with the way other males are of the species, if you did get the easy route, some of the other males would fling feces at you…just because.
I open doors because I’m polite. I carried heavy bags for my lady because I am strong, but I decide what is heavy. I’m not going to carry your 15 pound purse just because you don’t want to leave your laptop or poodle at home. I don’t want to spar with you, because you are my lady, a thing of beauty that should not be marred by black eyes and cauliflower ears. One of the most wonderful creations in this universe should be protected from idiots, thieves, pugilists, and devastating disappointments when possible. Not that she cannot protect herself and me if needed, but when you find a man that would jump in front of a bullet for you, don’t call him an idiot for it, and try not to put him in such a situation.
Ok, my rambling is done for this comment, but I have one more ramble left.
@Treasured
You will love again as much as I hate to say it. Romantics are simply that…romantics. The fact that it still upsets you means you are not so jaded in the game that you may actually win it someday. Kissing the frogs one at a time sure is hard work, but the prince you’re looking for will not want anyone lurking in the wings. His devotion to you will run high and he will see most people as a “potential” thief. Not in a horrible possessive stalker kind of way, but in a “I see the moon and sun rise and set in you, so I’m sure they do too, kind of way.”
Love hard specifically the way that you know YOU want to love. You can’t control anyone’s actions, merely let them be, protect yourself as best you can, and choose wisely. Selection is critical in the beginning, because once your heart is gone so is most of your reasoning.
Well I wasn’t going to weigh in on this topic but it has transformed into a discussion of exclusivity, double standards, and cheating for both irl and sugar.
I used to think it is no big deal if I have sex with someone else when either I’m in a committed relationship, she’s in a committed relationship, or both. That was until I found my best friend in bed with my girlfriend. It was like a double whammy and it really hurt a lot. But the incident changed me. Now I won’t go with anyone who is in a committed relationship because I have no idea what that relationship is and how I might effect it. I do not want someone else to feel what I felt that day.
To SD Guru
Sorry I did not see your reply, I figured everyone missed my post on the last blog.
Considering some past experiences I’ve had with other “sugar daddies” I was extremely surprised to someone real and serious. I’ve had one that manipulated me and treated me like I was dirt, another who bolted during the first meet. I just didn’t expect to find someone like him, someone that actually cared about me as a person. I’ll admit I have some issues, so it’s been hard for me to stand up for myself and in that way, I get taken advantage of quite easily. This guy has respected me from day one.
I do plan to speak with him about my feelings, hopefully soon. I guess if he does not feel the same, it may be better to end it now while it will hurt less. I would miss him and all the fun we have together, but I don’t want to end up broken hearted and attached. I just don’t know if I should do it in person or not, I don’t want to put him on the spot if I’m totally wrong about his feelings, I know that would be awkward…
Any advice for me? Thanks.
@ Madridista, hello, you will see how that blog is addicting – it is firts blogin my life and I already posting alot I think. ”…in my situation it’s easier to have a SD in Texas and another in Europe” – you talk like a man now ! We find a real feminist here. You are very modern woman, all my bussiness sucsessful female friends copying man-model behavoir.
I call it ”i just dowhat I want and nobody will do nothing about”
And to meet football people it is like date only models in man’s world !
Good Evening All !
I see that these blogs have been fast and furious today.
I must catch up.
Hope you are all well
x
@ Tequila, how seriouse, deep thinking and philosophic you can be ! When theese sober days will be over , JustADeepThoughtSD?
Who need 15 pounds purse when you can have a car and stuf it with 100 pounds first aid emergency kit. Including : sport change, 4 different kind dresses matching any events, high heels shoes, and very high heels shoes , souvenirs from last journey, clothes for/from dry cleening, … (here I want charming blog ladies complete the list)
I definitely fall into the category of being a romantic, but that didn’t translate or manifest in my sugar relationships. I understood and maintained the emotional boundaries and the one time I saw the potential for more, I declined the arrangement to pursue dating IRL. I wasn’t looking for Mr. Right and at most points wasn’t particularly open to it, but I knew that one day an incredible man might sweep my off my feet. In the meantime, I found arrangements very fun, sexy and fulfilling.
There are good men in this world, as well as good SDs. Most of the men I met were wonderful people and I’ve maintained lasting friendships in some cases. I haven’t had the experience of an arrangement going “terribly wrong” as I hear described so often when browsing the blog.
I attribute the harmony of my previous arrangements to a few factors: 1) Reasonable expectations 2) A good attitude and 3) heavy screening……. I wasn’t in a financial bind so if there wasn’t chemistry and genuine mutual admiration on more than a physical level, a first meeting would not occur.
After meeting, arrangement discussions would begin and there would be a few more dates prior to actually becoming involved. Once we knew we wanted to be together, the arrangement would begin. I expected nothing during the platonic stage. We’re both making the same time investment, right? It seems fair to me!
And in my crazy shedule any poodle willbe dead poodel, Tequila.
Mexicans do bad thing with tequila – last years fasion, called Sangrita : Tequila, lime juice…then tomato juice, orange juice and tobasco. Did you try it ? Don’t , we need you.
Tequila – I’m happy to hear that you are gentleman. Even if the car has keyless entry – I want the door opened if I am all dressed up and we are going on a fancy date. “You want to boom-boom with me? Open the door, genius!”
Thanks for explaining the fetishism/feminism thing, i was confused.
You’re right that people who “ignore the power struggle are afraid of losing power [over themselves]” On that note, I also ignore liars, manipulators, narcissists, sociopaths, angry controllers, stingy penny pinchers, wasps, tigers…I mean, the list just goes on and on. I also ignore people who are irritating and like to argue – so, yes, sometimes I have to ignore myself. lol
or was it twice shy who is the gentleman…uh, now its the wine talking
I Got Stood Up this evening!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
First time ever. This is def NOT my month…. What a loser.
(stood up by a pot SD). Total jerk. What do a person gain by not showing up??? It’s not like I’m ugly or fat. WTF
Hey Midwest, what kind of answer should I send to this loser?
“You have no idea what you just missed” or,
“Go f*ck yourself stupid *sshole?” or
“You owe me $20 for drinks,$ 30 for dinner and $5000 for pain and suffering?
I could kill someone right now I swear.
@CaliSB
Better to ignore him until he attempts to contact you, but I’m a guy what do I know. See what the lil fellar does. Has it been a few hours now? Has he tried to contact you? I don’t know if he’s toying with you, or legitimately had a reason. And by the way, welcome to the club, not only ugly and fat people get stood up or poofed. ( I know you’re annoyed, but shallow isn’t very becoming of you. Some of your best blogmates may consider themselves fat and yet still rush to support you when you’re feeling pissed.)
@Ellen
That’s a long list. I think the only thing left for you to talk to are mimes…oops, you can’t talk to them. And yes, I try to be a gentleman…when I’m not being a dick. Go figure.
@RussianSB
That drink sounds almost like a bloody mary…I think I may try it. Don’t worry, I’ll survive. And it sounds like your car had everything. Can it also turn into a robot like that movie?
JustATequilaSD: He sent me a lame text: ” sorry stuck in traffic, accident on highway”. Whatever if it is true or not, SUX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
@CaliSB
Is he still coming, or is it a cancellation?
Cali, I know it sucks! But if you’re n LA – it happens. A lot. Send him a message saying “Are you ok? And do you still want to meet me today?” If not, just delete his phone number and block him. Too many good ones out there to waste your time on the duds
Loser never showed up. What a waste of make up. Sometimes I wonder about this whole thing. Texted him : “if that’s what you do for fun, you really need to find a new hobby”.
@CaliSB
Sorry, but it happens to everyone at some point. Try not to take it too personally. Your passion and anger can be better used elsewhere. Next.
Why ? California SB , the old hobby pretty good and enterteining
Don’t show him that it touch you – this is his goal. If you fingers want to text so much, better write something like that : your broke my bisexual nimphomaniac girlfriend expectations, she is in my car now and very dissapointed.
I have very evil girlfriend, she can also invite him in some 2 hours throuh the traffic restorant (when he show interest in your GF) talk to him two hours and never show up at the place.
Dammit, I missed a lively discussion AND a Guru / Midwest day too! Crappola!
But, at least I had a good day at work! I hope everyone enjoys their Thursday!
@Treasured: I agree with Ellen in the opinion that he tried to dupe you, so he needed to go. I’m open to a lot of different types of relationships, but don’t treat me like I’m stupid, or that you can pull something over on me. I’m someone that still believes in love, and believes that when I’m ready I’ll find it. In the meantime, though, screw with me and you can f*** off. I deserve and demand respect and honesty. ‘Nuff said.
@Cali SB, I agree with JustATequillaSD, just next him. Honestly, the traffic excuse is overused sometimes. If the traffic is bad enough to warrant a cancellation, most people let their date know about it as soon as it gets closer to meeting time, not after they’ve been waiting and waiting, and think they’re being stood up.
@RussianSB — you’re right, I do tend to think sometimes like a man. I think I’ve been around work that’s very male dominant. I think I’ve just become too addicted to the football world and its men these past couple of years
@California SB – “Hey Midwest, what kind of answer should I send to this loser?”
“I really want to thank you for a couple of things. First I learned that you are a looser and it only cost me the price of a salad, and second I met a great guy here at the place. I would have called you to share this with you but I am enough of a lady not to talk with my mouth full. Warmest personal regards CASB”
I see so much past hurt expressed in some of these posts.
Did any Media articles touch on that?
Arrangements and SD-SB relationships could be used to mask or deal with past relationship pain?
No relationship can help with old wounds, Twiceshy
Only one lost monastery in Shao Linne can help
Or rehab in Beverly Hills.
It is why we need Sugar Rehab, I doubt that goverment will help us, but we start looking for our golden sponsors now
Golden boys, golden booooys … !
Silence, they all sleep at that hour.
Actually, I want share some ideas here. In Moscow all dates I planning in restorant close to my building. So the idea is – I always choose the meeting place and time, and never negotiate about.
Interesting comments for this post.
My input: I am not exclusive with men in general, so I’m not exclusive with my SD’s unless I really feel secure and there may be a LT relationship possibility. I understand the condom issue, but more often that not, I will use a condom with an SD. It provides a psychological barrier for me so i don’t feel to close to them.
Will be leaving my current SD soon as he is now complaining of his financial woes and the economy…but still finds the funds for outrageously priced and mediocre meals, cultural activities and travel.
I’m not in the business of being hoodwinked. He’s also gotten a bit insufferable with his spiritual journey. If he were smart he’d do more work and less searching for a higher plane of consciousness. Whatevs. On to the next, I suppose.
Seeing a potential this weekend. Very excited about that as we seemed to click well online. Just Hope that translates in person.
And if I travel, I travel only to sea side cities, if something goes wrong – I will make little nice vacation for myself. I deserve vacation and I can afford that also. And I am not into long mails, if man cannot call you – it it definatly fake profile.
@RussianSB What about Skype?
Much more versatile!
I actually prefer Skype to phone since it’s easy to be charming in emails and calls when no one sees you face to face. Skyping is kind of like having mini dates before you actually meet and see how they are face to face before deciding if it’s worth it to do an actual meet.
@twiceshy: I’m rootin’ for ya!
Perhaps SD’s simply reflect the state of our society but concentrated on the right side of the curve to the extent that they are married and the relationship is based on some deception from the beginning. I think it also explains some of the no shows, the conflict of getting away or perhaps the composition of the group he is traveling with.
At the risk of some serious flame
We do a lot of business with contractors, architects, lawyers, brokers and politicians. After decades of this a small red warning light goes off when when I find that he is a regularly grazing outside the home pasture. It’s not disqualifying, but it is a warning that if there is deception on a regular basis and it probably extends to other parts of his life. At the end of a business dinner I’ll occasionally leave the stub of the bill I paid on the table to see if someone picks it up, intending to charge their company for something I bought.
We (SD and SB) also live in a world where we have disappointments in many relationships. Taylor Swift nailed it wither her,” I knew he was bad from the beginning………… “
Goldfish raises an interesting question – how many SBs would prefer simpler meals and a larger allowance.
@Twiceshy, I am not comfortable use skype with starangers. Also it is cheap. I am in Russia, you know, every telephone call will cost 100-200$, that is additional financial filter . And my tickets, to fly me out of Russia will be 1000-2000$. I am surprised, but men with caliber I am interested in, never ask me for skype session, they just send me tickets.
Becose both sides interested in real meeting, not in BS.
*my favorite caliber 45
The result – no flakes. Only first one (first web date) was flake. At least it was rich joker
Fist snow fall in Moscow today… good , rain season is over !!!
OKay , I need to vent and hopefully get some advice . . . .I must be doing something wrong .
Has the caliber of pot SDs on this site changed in the last year ?
What are some red flags for Pot SDs that are only looking for a one night stand ?
I state in my profile and in my inital emails that Im looking for an on-going arrangement, and that Im NOT interested in a one night stand . However , everyone I seem to talk to is . They say they are looking for what I am , but that hasnt been the case .
For instance — I was talking with a Pot for about 2 weeks , and we decided to meet . Seemed to be on the same page about everything . The first date goes well and we spent hours talking in person . He says how great I am , how perfect , this will work out great , etc etc . and he invites me back to his place . Everything goes great there as well and he says how sexy I am and how he cant wait to see me next week . So I make contact the next week , email, call, text — no response . I try the next day and the next ,nothing . Finally he says hes not interested . Thats funny , he was thrilled about everything when we were together. So what happened?
If they are not interested why the hell would you invite someone back to your house , say how great they are and set up another date , just to Poof . Honestly goes a long way with me , but it seems to be a quality that is in short supply here.
Anyway to safegaurd against this kind of thing ?
Im sure there are some women that would be fine with this sort of one time thing on the site. Under the “Looking for” section of everyones profile there should be a category for “duration” ( Long -term, short term, or one night stand) and that way the people looking for one night stands can find each other . Just an idea. Because Im getting very frustrated with these type of guys.
Venting over.
Advice and comments please ?
Interest view Flyr.
Does that extend to married SB’s who are in sexless marriages and cannot get out of them due to finance and other commitments they have to fulfill at that time?
I can see why you would perhaps look for small red warning lights at times, like we all would, but there are still some people who are very loyal and honest in lots of other areas of their lives and the above view would not be right.
Apologies if I have read it incorrectly.
ElizabethSweet — sorry about your experience. You might want to read “How to Spot A Fake Sugar Daddy” under Sugar Daddy Dating Tips. Also, I can’t discern whether you were intimate with him (and not judging if you were), but I think the best way to make sure the SD doesn’t want a one night stand, is to have a few dates before you are intimate with him. If a guy is really into you, he will wait a bit IMHO.
ElizabethSweet.
Can I ask you , this your last one night stand – did he support you financially ? (did he give you any money? For that one time sex?) , may he does not have money to see you again and just does not want to admit that. ?
And the answer about serial SDs is – They keep shopping (coz they can and coz they r dogs and pigs) they can not stop, new younger sexy SBs every a few weeks, they get 30 sexy e mails a day, with sexy pictures and promises of the best time of their lives,
So they keep trying different candies.
NC Gent –
I did read that , and he wasnt giving off any of those signs . I even asked him about exactly what he was looking for face to face and he assured me he didnt have any interest in a one night stand either. A few months ago I went on 3 dates with a pot SD and we had a great time each time and really liked each other , so I thought . On the way home from the last date ( was not intimate) he texted me to say he wasnt interested in someone that was just teasing him .. I wasnt teasing at all ! He never discussed allowance or an arrangement , so I assumed he wasnt ready yet . Is there a tactful way the SB can bring up the topics of allowance or arrangement or is that ball always in the SDs court? So I guess I didnt “put out” quick enough on that one , lol .But on this last situation , too soon . Ahhhhhhhhh ! I thought one of the perks about this type of relationship is that both parties can be honest, open , and direct and put their expectations out there without judgement or offense .
Ive had long term sucessful arrangements in the past , but things have changed since I was on here before . Oh well , screening , screening, screening . . . . . .
@ElizabethSweet — if it makes you feel better, a number of people have commented that the level of screening required now is a lot more than it used to be. The mainstream media attention has brought some less than desirable sugars to the site and that has made it that much harder for those who are sincere. Others have suggested only being intimate because you want to, not because it is part of a deal. Not sure that works either. Don’t be afraid to ask the SD what he had in mind regarding an arrangement on the first or second date (or even before). If he is reluctant to talk about it, that is a huge clue he isn’t legitimate.
Thats fine if he just wanted a one time thing — but he didnt need to bold-faced lie to me . Im sure there are plenty of girls on here that would have taken him up on his offer and been happy about . But why do it to someone who has zero interest in a fling ?
I know , because they can . . . . ugh .
Now I see why being a B*tch might work for some people , lol.
GoldFish.
” I will use a condom with an SD. It provides a psychological barrier for me so i don’t feel to close to them”
This is the quote of the month
I suspected condoms could provide psychological 1 mm
barrier for someone. seriously.
I never see a condom like a psychological barrier (just to prevent STD barrier ) , but I was thinking for some people it could be less personal with a condom.
I can get very emotionally involve (fall in love ) with a guy we always ! Use condom.
so for me a condom does Not work as a psychological barrier . 
And Not to get involve emotionally at all (if it is possible , it is still very personal relationship) and go No condom all the time . like with my last NY SD we were exclusive, no condoms (I hesitated a lot, we both got tested, I asked my guys friends if really I had to go no condoms, he is white, clean, successful, married , generous, and then decided “what the heck, let’s go no condoms , for me No difference , but he hated ! them …)
we r still good friends with this guy but I did not had any “crush” , and still respect him a lot.
NC Gent –
90% of the men I talk to wont talk about allowance or arrangement before we meet . And those that do just ask me what I want , rather than what they are comfortable with .
Ive been off and on the site for a few years. The very first man I ever met I ended up seeing for well over a year . He was perfect . Since then no one has really gotten close . But I thought that lightningmight strike twice so i tried again
Elizabeth — I know this isn’t a newsflash, but some men lie to get laid. I know imagine that!
The allowance dance is always a tough one… there are a number of opinions on this. Give them a number that you are comfortable with and some reasons for your amount. If they aren’t comfortable talking about it, move on to the next. Glad you had one positive experience – that is better than a large percentage of SBs
NC — Some pot SDs have told me that the second a pot SB brings up allowance , he thinks that all she cares about is the $. Therefore , Ive tried to wait for them to bring it up.
Elizabeth – It was not clear to me if you slept with him on the first date but in the absence of a beam of light from the heavens I think it is GENERALLY not a good idea on the first encounter to go back to his house for any reason.
There are of course exceptions to any rule.
Thankfully men are attracted to women to the point that they sacrifice good judgement in many cases. Sugar is about monetizing some of the attraction.
Lady V – There are always exceptions but most who claim this exemption (i.e. Bill Clinton, Howard Dean and of course Gary Hart – ) are making a self serving choices of wanting both. If a wife is physically unavailable due to a long term illness then that’s probably a good exception. The fact that she’s a bitch, rich or you can’t politically afford a divorce is a lame excuse.
@RussianSB are these experienced SDs, or are they doing this for the first time? After my experiences I’m not meeting anyone overseas before I actually see them in real time at least once lol. Aside from the person never showing up, what if she shows and you then realise her photos were retouched, or taken 6 years ago (I’ve read about that happening).
And on the flip side, what about meeting a stranger who you’ve never really seen? You look at him and recognise him from America’s Most Wanted lol lol .
Affording $2000 plane tickets and making phone calls isn’t really “caliber” in my view, it’s just money and a lot of guys could probably afford that (I can
).
But If I were playing the role of the SB and a very wealthy woman sent me plane tickets sight unseen to fly to another country for a week with her, I’d get more than a little suspicious. Sarr isn’t an Escort Agency that does background checks of that nature , after all. Anyone can register here and afford plane tickets. I think it’s a safety issue on both sides as well.
I wouldn’t bring anyone to me, or travel to a rendezvous with someone who refuses to chat for 5 minutes on video. If she requested that we talk on the phone first, and then progress to a video chat as a final step that would be fine too.
I also think that the person that wants to assure themselves and actually make that eye contact (virtual though it may be) is probably interested in an actual connection. Please note..I am not talking about some sort of freaky chatroulette scenario! ha ha ha!! Just a normal skype chat ^_^
You’re so…so *dangerous* @RussianSB. Like drinking from a flaming glass of Sotlichnaya while dancing naked through Chernobyl in winter.
*siiiiiigh*
@ElizabethSweet sometimes SBs don’t take criticism very well. You might notice aspects of her personality, style of dress etc. that you don’t like. But at what point are you going to say so? You may just continue and figure that the personality, good looks, or something else would make the rest insignificant. Or decide that you may as well make the best of the night. Remember these are men we’re talking about. If the night was going well, the second brain was probably doing all the talking and making all the decisions.
Sometimes the guy can leave and upon reflection realise damn…that wasn’t what he expected, or what he wanted. Of course, absolutely *not* responding to texts, calls, emails etc. isn’t cool either.
And it could just be he did it because he could.
For the younger SB – Hart made most of us smile – He had the bad fortune to be photographed lounging in the stern of a boat with miss abundant charms hanging on tightly. The name of the boat clearly visible in the photograph Monkey Business It was the end of his Presidential campaign.
The moral of the story is that sometimes discretion is more important than behavior.
Related to our current discussion – I have known of a couple of SD’s who turned away from a meeting at the last minute as they ran into a friend or friend of their spouses near the meeting. They may not be willing to share that with their potential SB and simply disappear. Of course a gentleman would not do this or would offer a great gift laden apology in real time. .
I had not thought of it for these reasons but a museum is a great place for a meeting. There’s usually food service with good wine but more importantly gives you a chance to move around and find places to talk in a stimulating environment. When a gentleman sits down in a restaurant with an attractive younger woman people are interested . It gets worse if there are friends or acquaintances in the same place. It’s hard to ask for another table as it brings even more attention. Favorite for the LA area would be the Getty Villa or Hammer in Westwood. For the SB who get’s stood up it’s not such an embarrassing environment. It’s also a very safe place to meet.
Oh flyr, you are making me so homesick talking about Getty Villa. I used to live just blocks away. ..
Good point btw, flyr. (russian or ILWCG may have touched on this one, too) I don’t think I would mind getting stood up, or just having a date go sour, if I was in a beautiful place and could enjoy the scenery regardless of the outcome of the date.
Re: Skype chat … A LOT of SDs have requested this and, admittedly, I’m just not that comfortable with it. I don’t have any social media accounts and nothing besides my resume exists online- no pictures online aside from my SA picture where I have blurry eyes.
More recently, I’ve begun to warm up to the idea of Skype (via FaceTime on iPhone bc I don’t have a Skype account) Namely because I would rather Skype chat than send pictures of myself to a random stranger on the Internet.
So, lately, when people message me and want to Skype chat, I respond “let’s chat on the phone first” … Then, Poof!
Guys, why won’t they talk on the phone first before Skype?
@EllenSugarB That makes no sense to me either. A phone call works, the point of Skype/Facetime is just to see the person realtime. Make some eye contact…that sort of thing. There’s the confidence factor I suppose. Skype/facetime you do need to actually show yourself. The person could decide..hey…I don’t like the way you look bye bye.
Quick anecdote…a SB I met told me that she was in a “relationship” with a guy who refused to video chat. Only phone calls, IM chat etc. It turns out he was a 60 year old guy. Hence the reason he never wanted to show his face in real time. I don’t know where he was getting all the photos of this younger guy he sent to her. (actually I don’t want to know lol!)
Thank you.
Now I have another question Guys/Girls: A lot of times I will get a message from a man who is SOOOO interested in getting to know me, gives me a phone number, then wants to text. Yes, Text Message. I respond with my phone number and say “call me when you have time”
I’m not looking for an hour long drawn out conversation, just a simple “hello” and chit chat for a few minutes to verify they are actually a real person and not a fake SD with 27 different profiles and a lot of time on their hands.
Call me old fashioned, but I find text message impersonal. This could have a lot to do with the way I was raised ex: My father won’t even respond to text messages. He deletes them. My first boss, president of the financial firm I worked for,and mentor, said “Don’t use text message, you never know who is on the other side”
Further, we have messaging on SA. Why do you need an email? We have messaging right here on SA there’s no need for email.
SA message>endless email>endless texts>nowhere. In my eyes text and email is just another arbitrary barrier to getting to know someone. You want to get to know me.? Pick up the phone, dial, say hello, set a date … TaDaa!
You don’t need email and you don’t need text. If you’re so busy that you can’t have a two minute phone conversation, how the heck are we ever going to meet? No, you’re not too busy. The freakin president of the united states can have a two minute conversation. The Forbes top 20 richest men can have a two minute conversation. ER Doctors can have a two minute conversation. So who the F are you Taliban?!
Ok. B!tch rant over. Lol
…wait, a little more b!tching…
Word of advice to SDs..when you DO actually have a phone conversation, DONT spend the entire time talking about the 38 women you’ve dated from SA. It makes you sound repulsive! Have some manners, genius.
Oh, nobody told you? There is one woman on this entire planet that I am concerned about: ME. NOT your ex-wife, not you 38 potential SBs – no, I could care less about those people. Especially in the first freakin phone conversation. Geez! Quite frankly, after hearing about your ex wife and 38 pot SBs that didn’t work out-I just hung up on you because I realized why you are single!
Sorry guys, I have to bitch here so I don’t get resentful and have a bad attitude with the GOOD ONES!
@ellenSB – “Guys, why won’t they talk on the phone first before Skype?”
Personally I like the phone for its convenience and also if you are only listening you are probably listening more carefully to what someone is saying. I’m not up on my technology but assume it’s pretty easy to save a skype conversation and it may not be something you want saved.
From talking with some SB’s some time ago it seemed that some of those pushing for going from em to skype were either focused on the physical or hoping to talk the potential SB into doing a show for them..
Without getting too melodramatic I think you have to assume that anything you put on the internet will be retrievable for eternity and increasingly searchable. Skype or similar leaves no question as to the identity and also is much more likely to gain public interest with video in a visual world.
@Elizabethsweet, can you please put down his profile number here for we mark him as serial SD ? Smal percent in the blog but mostly very active people here. I always block users reported badly in the blog
RE : Skype chat
Im not a fan for a couple reasons –
1. I dont always have my hair and makeup done when Im just at home , and first impressions count . So I would have to get ready for a skype chat the same way I get ready for an in person date . If Im going to spend all the time getting ready , Id rather just meet in person for lunch . dinner , drinks, whatever.
2. Skype isnt flattering . Theres that weird blueish computer glare you get and dont always look so hot . I skyped once with a guy who I then met in person and he even said — “wow , you look so hot person” wasnt sure how to take that , like I didnt look good on skype ? lol
3. The last time I skyped ( and probably why I wont again anytime soon ) I was greeted by the pot SD crotch , not face . Well it was a head , but not the one I wanted to see . Delete. Block .
My reasons for disliking Skype
Ellen SB – I think you are spot on, especially if you are looking for a real SD with longevity. A couple of friendly modifications – I do not have a posted picture so I need an email address to send one to and I do not call up SA in the work environment even though it is my place. Bad example. Thus some em and text are used but only very brief.
I’ll also tease Ellen with the fact that it’s one of the most beautiful days you could imagine down here today.
Agree that the discussion of prior SB should be limited to yes or no , what I found great about them in 25 words or less. Let her ask any further questions. It’s also important to me that I share some common interests and values. Are they bitter or positive and the final test – when we say goodbye (for the moment) will I be looking forward to the next time and feeling better than when we met?
.
@twiceshy, all of them ” old sharks ” very experiensed and very busy guys. And my tickets fare not big expenses to them, while their time much more valuable
@Russian SB — I dont want to post it here , although I got lied to , I dont want to puclically air the dirty laundry . But to the Moderator here — if you would like to give Russian SB my email addy — Ill private message you the profile number .
Ladies ! In my experiense (from real life, not web dating) good SD not one who want discuss the allowance, but one who give the allowance and never discuss it. What do you think about ?
@Elizabeth, unfortunately, fake SDs know by heart all our ”red flags” and know how to talk tous and what to promice. It is not your fault , that you trust people, all you can do is report him.
BLOG GODS exchange our mails with Elizabethsweet, please.
@Elizabeth – why, you care about his good reputation ?? All profiles reforted here when you look at them usually really have red flags
@Russian SB — With my very first SD there was no discussion of allowance. We went to dinner , He made me an offer , handed me an envelope and said take a few days to think about . I accepted and we happily saw each other for over a year. Why arent things simple like that anymore ? *sigh*
Not his reputation I care about . Posting his profile number here will probably send 100 new messages his way from Pot SBs . I dont want to give him the traffic and boost his ego. Any publicity is good publicity .
@Twiceshy, the first my question when I meet someone first time is about if my appearence match his expectations. And I never have problems with answers, you know
Risky or not, potential SDs always provide me with their personal info, without even my request. Usually they older 45 level and don’t like to use skype, still fine with the phone.
Can you imagine Sugars ?? Chemistry on skype not guarantee chemistry in person:):):)
Skype is cheap, already have a lot of followers/addicts, and my skype session can be recorded and surfe the web. Again skype is cheap and available to everyone.
Believe me or not, Sugars, my filters work grate.
@ Goldfish – You are hilarious! I can relate to the “insufferable spiritual journey” thing bigtime.
I think I know about the ” insufferable spiritual journey” guy, too. He had issues.
@ElenSugarB, I love you, Sugar !
Skype vs Phone , and phone is still winning as screening tool. BINGO !
I always offer to pot talk a lot and e-mail me a lot, ask me any questions. I can talk by phone any time, but skype I cannot do at work, and at home (I live with parents) I don’t want someone see ocationally my video chat with potential SD through my shoulder, extreme doesn’t exite me at all. I don’t need to explaine it to my favorite caliber SD
@ILoveWestCoastGirl
“white, clean, successful, married , generous”
OK, maybe I’m trying to understand people a bit better so I’m going to stand here like a deer in headlights and say WTF? Can you explain why no condoms is ok if he is white, clean, successful, married, generous…explain it like I’m a complete idiot or just arrived here in North America and don’t know the social rules yet. If you got a disease or got pregnant by a married man, is it ok because he is white? I realize these were your friends words, but should I just try to understand that non-whites are unclean, unsuccessful, cheap philanderers?
ElizabethSweet- Im still not sure if you slept with the guy or not, but I’ll assume that you did since you’re upset. I’ll also assume that he gave you no allowance, and that it probably makes you feel like crap. This has happened to some of my girlfriends who are also on this site. The guy acts like he is completely into her, invites her over, they hook up and he either 1) says he will give her the allowance next time, and never does, 2) wired it to her bank account, then reversed the charge the next day, 3) refuses to give her an allowance and tells her to leave – this guy had some brass! I’d be afraid that the girl would go bat sh!t and return to my home later that night and stab me in the neck.
Here is why situation 1,2 and 3, have not been favorable for an SD I have dated:
1) No, you won’t give me my allowance next time. You will give it to me now, and you will be a gentleman, and we won’t have an argument about it. -he gave me my allowance
2) No, you’re not going to wire it to my account. Im not comfortable with random things showing up on my bank statement. If you want to get into an arrangement with me, you can take care of me now, in cash. Otherwise, we can wait, you’re worth waiting for
(unless I’ve known the guy for a LONG time, like my 2 yr prior SD, there’s no freakin way I’m going to get someone involved in my personal finances via wire transfer) -No wire transfer. He went to the ATM and came back.
3) We agreed on what you would give me, so that’s what you’re going to do. Give me problems now, and you’re going to have problems later. -He gave me my allowance.
Two years with the same SD and he STILL would complain about allowance from time to time. Every time, my response was just as listed above. OH, but I forgot time 4 which might be my favorite example:
4) We had an agreed on allowance amount for th past year. He says “I only have ‘x’ on me.” I say “Give me a moment to NOT take that personal. He says “I knew you would take it that way.” I said “hmmm. Interesting.” Thinking (you knew I would take it that way, yet you tried it anyway? Dum Dum.). I respond, making no mention of allowance, “Our worth is measured by what we give, not what we have. So, I would like to give myself, and my time, to you.” All of a sudden I was so “kind and loving to him” and he was coming down with a cold and wanted to meet another time. I said, “As you wish. Hope you feel better” So, yeah, that’s what I said to him. “Our worth is measured by what we give, not what we have.” And what I MEANT by that is “Your cheapness defines you.” …butI would never say it…but he knew it…
Basically, get your allowance ahead of time and before you even CONSIDER getting intimate with the person
You know where this guy lives and he pulls this bs on you?! Wow. … Wow. Wow. Wow. Doesn’t he know that women aren’t to be tampered with? Man child.
I’m on a roll today with the b!txhing aren’t I? Lol
JATSD – that one got me, too. Lol
@Twiceshy, my boys have bad experiense and share with me, but it is web daiting, it happens. Nobody stop us from using VIP personal professional matchmakers
(both SD and SB). It works much better . But web is still more easy and comfortable way.
And serious realistic people understand and accept all misunderstanding during process.
I also surprised with naive people who blame Brandon in personal bad experience, and still continue use that site WTF ? It is same like come to some bar, meet the owner and tell him: ” I come tonight to your famous bar to have some drinks with friends and have a good time, but I found out how many drunk bustards arround …”
It is just a database. I can find a partner without it, and you (adressed to everybody)?
Guru told me to have boundaries….
LOl Russian SB you always make me laugh!
TequilaSD.
how come you ripped it out of the sentence
“we agreed to exclusivity, got both STD tested ….. he was clean, white, married…” Blah…blah…”
Have to run, will elaborate more later.
Skype is cheap ! Skype is not Sugar tool, skype is Mustard tool !
For someone it works better. But our goal not skype meeting, but real meeting.
Not skype dating but sugar dating !
(drowing in big letters street advertisement,
SKYPE – NO, RESTORANT – YES !
MONEY FILTERS ARE THE BEST)
white noise – I can’t get no… satisfaction…
@ILWCG
If it didn’t matter that he was white why would you put it in the sentence? Did it make a difference to you as you weighed your options of whether or not you were making a good decision? If he was Arab,Asian,Black, Hispanic, Indian, or Native American would it really have made a difference for no condoms if he was clean, generous, and successful? I like to know exactly how people think so I know exactly what they mean when they speak.
@RussianSB
Yes, you are addicted to blogging and funny. Are you drinking tequila? lol
While sitting in that blog is an elegant way to kill time, for me it is also English lessons,
and good ones, you see, I am able to do simple verses now. And when I did start poststing, it was like ”sono russa, mi nombre Santa-Lucia, pueblo no bueno, dos hombres con pistolas, es la playa de pidras o arena?”.
Push your kids make foreign blogs !
Hi RussianSB
Love your thoughts.
I take it Skype is a NO then
You are right it is sugar dating not skype dating.
Talking on the phone is more personal then on to the excitement of meeting if it feels ok for both.
I have never had tickets sent to me. Where am I going wrong? Boo Hoo
xx
Amigo !!! No Teqila, my friend is tequila, how can I eat/drink my friends !
Come Stai ?
@LadyVuitton, my northern amiga, hello ! Some good fairy correct my grammar in my profile, now I am not shame for Shekespear language anymore. We have first snow today, what about you ? You see, they must fly me from Moscow, they affraid to go to Moscow, coz it is not candy shop it is Charlie-Chocolate-Plant and high Sugar in your blood make you diabetical
If I live in London I meet in London, but I leave at the World End.
@Tequila – do you have already your Jack Sparrow suit for Halloween ?
What should I wear ? I will always ask for your opinion now
…aaaaand I just had one of the BEST SA phone conversations ever! His voice was sweet as molasses, he was a perfect gentleman, we thought alike, he is the perfect age (early 50′s), very intelligent, good looking -an absolute pleasure to speak with. No mention of allowance aside from “men are traditionally supposed to provide for women.” He sounds perfect. Now THAT part is scary. Either he IS perfect, or he is a sociopath. And if he IS perfect, I need to get him off the market asap!
…aaand I just got a message for $200 Skype sessions. lolololol Block.
Your english language is coming along a treat (very well)
I hope you are keeping very well.
No snow here but no rain for a couple of days. It is just cold..
You will have to get out our of sugarland Moscow soon. We cant have you turning diabetic
Do you get to London?
You are lucky getting a good fairy to correct your profile. I am sure it is wonderful.
…I am getting vision here…I see music, and food, a handsome man….oh wait, I’m getting another vision…I see panties dropping for this man. Lots and lots of panties, ALL over the map. MMMMMM…I love me a mature man.
See, thats the beauty of the phone conversation. It lets me visualize an image of the person I’m talking to.
Thanks gang for chiming in on the Skype topic (especially flyr who I think understands my desire to keep my digital footprint at zero) NO Skype. Skype = No Dinner. And I’m HUNGRY!
@Lady Vuitton – Am I alone in completely ignoring the phone and skype options?
Form me, it’s emails/messaging to see if we click, and the a meet, nothing in between.
Having said that, anyone who can’t capture my imagination with their ability to compose interesting/sexy/flirtations emails is never going to work anyway…
@ EllenSugarB Keep that vision on that perfect man. Wont help the HUNGER at the moment but I am sure he will turn up real soon
But you did make me smile with the visions you had
@EllenSugarB I’m lost. Why imagine an image when you can just see exactly who he is? What happens when you meet and the image is all wrong?
@RussianSB: actually, you CAN eat your friends
And I think Tequila would let you drink him up ANYDAY, as long as you make him laugh before and after 
I have to say Happy SD that after a series of emails (not too many) I do like to speak with someone on the phone to put a voice and personality to the text. Also to confirm they are who they say they are.
I am not a Skype person either although I have been asked numerous times why I dont have it.
Nothing beats meeting up, but sometimes distances can be a little bit of an issue and schedules so a phone call is a second step towards that.
It is all that you are comfortable with.
Having said that, there is nothing wrong with a little mystery HappySD as well. A bit like a blind date after a few email conversations. That can be exciting.
Tell me, what is a reasonable amount of flirtation/sexy correspondances without it going too far mmmm food for thought
xx
twiceshy … phone call gives me the vision. if i like the vision, then we meet for a date. i told him point blank : i want to see you when you visit my hometown next week. and i hope he asks me out. but he sounded very busy and flattered with the iflux of attention he is getting from the site. i need him on a date, in person.
sorry, but i dont know how to seduce people over e-mail. and i dont really want to. i like human contact.
Read my today blog advices, Lady V., follow the white rabbit, good girls learning from someone else mistakes, not from their own. And you will have your tickets.
I am Lady Godiva, I care about you girls, I am going to fight those FakeSugarDaddyCastratos who beat tender, younger, slim ladies.
I am take it too personally.
The main idea : money is the best filter.
*If he wanna POOOF his goal to cut expences on every communication step and level.
*Never give up on your conditions of mailing, meeting, travelling. Not negotiate your conditions, while allowance can be negotiated, sugar will be sugar anyway. You ought him NOTHING. He is not using VIP services and can claime nothing extra of you.
*Have special phone for dating, if you interested in SD you must provide some way to communicate, don’t play secret agents, it will annoy serious potentials SDs. And it will poof flakes and fake profiles in the beginning. When you give you phone number stop mailing it has no sense.
*Meet at place and at time – convinient to you, not negotiate that. If he interested he will respect your conditions. If he have special requests, he is not so exited about arrangement and about you, maybe he already fine with his girl (girls) just curious,do you interested to spend your time like that ? Never be late yourself for meeting, it is huge disrespect.
*Be adequate to your allowance conditions, rich people have huge pool to choose from,
to make profile and show up is not enough. It is like job interview, only the best will get an offer.
twiceshy: “@EllenSugarB I’m lost. Why imagine an image when you can just see exactly who he is? What happens when you meet and the image is all wrong? ”
Ok, let me try this once more. This time with a little more composure…
I have to REALLY like WHO the person IS, not WHAT they are. I have to like how they THINK to find them attractive, let alone sexy. I saw a picture of him, that’s enough. Looks aren’t important to me, any way. Not even IRL.
Honestly, with past boyfriends, most people would give us looks like “WTF?! How did HE end up with HER?!” Actually, they would even make verbal comments of such. Saying rude things like “She’s out of your league buddy.” as we walked by. I got so irritated one time when someone said that I spat back, “Ew, rude.” Kissed my boyfriend and walked on. I WANTED to say ” How did HE end up with ME? Because he is smarter than you, and he has a personality. Moron”
My point is – I have to like the mans personality, and I can get a good understanding about that from a phone conversation and then decide if I want to meet him. Skype isn’t necessary and I don’t want to be put on blast with our Skye session going viral on the internet. I would Skype AFTER I have already met someone and I am in an arrangement with them.
Money matters, yes. But it isn’t some magic thing that spreads my knees apart.
…aaaand there goes my composure. Never have been very good at composition…
One more time @EllenSugarB I’m lost. Why imagine an image when you can just see exactly who he is? What happens when you meet and the image is all wrong?
I DO want to see exactly who he is, that is exactly why I told him that I want to go on a date with him when he arrives to my home town next week. If we meet and the image is all wrong, then we enjoy each others company for the duration of the date, and we say good-night. One step at a time…
See? This is why the Skype and so on is so important for me
Msgd on the site a few times, then went to Skype. Nice chat. Then spoke voice. Although she said she understood English very well etc. and the written chat was no problem, she could not understand a word I said, and I could barely understand her. That would have been a disaster after a trip! I’m sticking to my skype rules, maybe add phone calls as well ^_^
Somewhere up there NC Gent said “guys want to get laid.”
Girls want to get laid, too! F
or me the pathway is a little different than: get allowance>knees spread apart.
It’s more like Message>Talk>Get into my head>Go on a date(s)>Get into my heart>Panties Drop
I need to be seduced just like a man does, but a fat wallet alone isn’t going to get you there!
Phone first, then Skype. I would Skype with the guy I talked to today. He wasn’t into the skype thing. He was up for a date. Yay for me!
Love it Russian SB
You will an excellent protector of all SB’s
I certainly will take the advice and follow the white rabbit
…and you better be a DAMN good conversationalist and tell me everything I want to ear to get me to Skype with you. This guy gets the academy award!
That was really sweet of you to say you want to protect us, Russian.
Russian Mafia, you know, EllenSB
some more advices: (while mailing)
While real maniac burst in real fire before he can thinks and calm down.
*ask some questions (any) and if you not get answers, he is ignoring you, he is fake. It is small detail but very important, really.
*never give a good hints and tips in you letters. If you are asking in what restorant we will meet ? You choose any – isn’t answer. Or what is your favorite restorant – lady say X- he answer OK we go to X. You don’t want to find yourself in expensive place with compleete moron without money to pay bill. The correct answer will be – I like X,Y and Z restorants, choose the one better located to your place, dear. Sugar boys already knew all cool places and it is not problem for them to indicate their level high or medium. But no level at all ???
*sometimes is also good to provoke a little potSD to answer you rude way. Real gentelmen not buy your BS, coz he used to girl’s BS
@EllenSugarB ok ok
I understand where you are coming from heh heh ^_^ And you make perfect sense, I just didn’t think about it that way.
And we must know the face of enemy, find some time, ladies, and visit Fakesugardaddyblog, reading save you a lot of nervs in future.
Where that Texas charming lady with big gun…oh, she lives off-blog too, I forget.
Where is Tequila, I need his wisdom for my fight.
I prefer love, no war.
But who you think you are, fake SD ? To use and abuse yong stupid ladies ( their favorite category 18-25y.o.) with MTV sugar fantasies ? Do you want someone treat your dother like that ?
TequilaSD.
“I like to know exactly how people think so I know exactly what they mean when they speak”
? even guys like Shakespeare , Dostoevsly, Z. Fraud … were trying to figure this out for years…
I am not sure my answer would solve that for you.
But If you want to know how I think you can read my posts for the 2011-2012
or 
We can Skype … so you know how I speak.
But to know what women mean/think when they speak…
And seriously ! the main thing to be sure it is a save sex (after the medical testing of course) the fact that he is 1. married ( – much less chances he has any SBs except for me (he already has to hide his time, income… from his wife, his time is very limited, no free time to shop and get a new SB every week) , 2. he is successful , a founder and CEO of big company and he can not trust too many girls coz has to be very discreet , he is risking already with opening his identity to even one SB.
But who knows there are womanizers and people who make bad decisions and might do unproteceted sex with strangers … I do not know, risky, risky …anyway.
Since no one share Altoids and oral sex experiences any more…
Let us bring up STD topic again (and that Guru’ dead horse
@ILWCG
Such ideas are so indoctrinated in some people that they don’t even understand that there is a problem here in the US, until someone throws a stereotype directly at them. The only way to fix the problem is to keep having sex until everyone has someone they love on all sides of the color fence. I was lucky.
Effective evasion of the point.
@RussianSB and @Tina
My blood alcohol level is within normal human levels at the moment. You would not want to drink me yet. Counting down the hours. Finishing up some smaller projects over the next 24 hours. I hear the big drum. RELEASE THE TEQUILA!! **BOOM**
@RussianSB
re: costume
I think most of the parties will be this weekend, and I will honestly be too drunk to care. Halloween Day is on a Wednesday and the plans I was making are just way up in the air. So, maybe I’ll just be the PeeWee Herman and sing the Tequila song. For you, Jessica Rabbit? Marylin Monroe? Are these people popular in Russia?
Yeah, Marilyn Monroe – we just twins !!!
I told you, you know better ! But Tequila you revealing some very professional skills. From where you get them? Too much dealing with women ? Or you have diplome ?
Happy birthday, mister Tequila-President
Happy Friday, Take care !
This feed is great and shows me so much about the media. Thank you guys! If you guys could take the survey too that would be of great help!! The link is above.
) If you have any questions let me know!
@RussianSB
Where did JaTSD
I used to be a 36th Degree Grandmaster Pimpologist at a Monk-Pimp monastery in the mountains of North America. (Where did you think they got their money?) I took the place of my mentor by stealing his girlfriend and all his women. To even study with him I had to get my heart broken 1600 times. I stepped down and released the title when I fell in love with Cinderella and made some new fairy tales. WTF was I thinking?
My natural intuition, fiery passion, decent memory, and beaming optimism, allows me to make friends very easily…usually. LOL. These same talents can be curses…intuition and memory can make me “right” on too many occasion. Add this to the passion and optimism, and now you have an undeniable smart ass that will smile at you as he delivers his sarcasm. (What a Dick!)
Oops.
re: Where did JaTSD get his verbal skills?
@Tequila: but I’ve found that people with the “scary” intuition can also provide support and care when most needed, and can end up sending the sweetest messages with the best timing. True, it can creep people out, but it can also endear them to you.
Now, if only your super powers extended to get rid of headaches………
Tina, where your big gun (you must have one as real texas lady) I need for castrates hounting. Season is open ! Why they think creatures with nice done nails cannot stand for themselves ? I have such an experiense with one Long-term SD, that after him I am affraid nothing, even huge Carrebean spiders !
Does anyone know what ISO means? I read “ISO Sugar Baby” on a profile and I don’t know what it means. Let me know. Thanks!
@EllenSugarSB: ISO = In Search Of
Nothing more refreshing than a bunch of brand new 100 dollar bills nicely stacked. Oh, so pretty. That’s too bad they will be gone by tomorrow at the mall. Whohhoooo!!
I love my secret sugar life. That math degree paid off… love counting!!
Going to a Halloween party this weekend. Costume? Playboy bunny OF COURSE!!!!
Thanks
What has the media gotten right/wrong about sugar?
That only straight, white, guys are sugar daddies.
And, to me, it’s not exactly that they have gotten it wrong, it’s that they like the more salacious story to highlight, the one that fits THEIR version of what sugar is. Even if THEY have NEVER BEEN in the sugar world.
I think I will get me a blonde wig and go as Gloria Steinem for Halloween!
Hi Honey!!!! Long time no talk!
Hi AnnaMW! I got caught up in the working woman’s world. Got my house of cool chicks and I’m selling those breasts and thighs like you would not believe it!! and getting a high price for my ladies work!! I got people calling asking what they eat,if they are dressed.And don’t even get me started on how many times a week they are laying…
And I sincerely hope you and everybody else are doing great, I am!
New car,business,travel, you, know the usual! But….the inevitable has happened,he is in love….I do love my new ring,I could kinda tell he was serious when he said,”Maybe I should be on my knees to give you this…” When I demurred, he said , “but you do know I want to marry you someday…” Awkward…..
I
I’m going to be looking for another relationship soon….maybe sugar, maybe not.
I need to catch up on all that I missed on the blog!!
Ребенок Сахара @Russian
Я люблю ваши комментарии. Однако, я имею эту задержку, чувствуя, что Вы могли бы только жить в общежитии колледжа в северном Висконсине и смеяться надо всеми нами.
Я подразумеваю, как – это, если Вы являетесь действительно российскими, что Вы считаете Tequela по хорошей Водке
Весь мой Летчик любви
Flyr @ Russian : ” I have a feeling that you might just live in a college dorm in northern Wisconsin, laughing at all of us”
ahaha too funny…
Flyr: I don’t speak one word of Russian but I was able to read what you wrote with google translator. So, even if Russian is faking it…. she can still read your post, buddy. LOL
Diamond SDs who could have it all but decides he can find younger college girls that can be easily manipulated here. He would wanna bed you on the first date without protection. Thereafter, treat you like one of his escorts or pass you over to his “brother” when he is done with while sitting opposite of you, dining with another girl he is dating over the site. He is a big shot in real estate, football, non British.. Good looking. Takes you to dine with his business partners who are mostly related to him. Very pretty girls from Poland or Belgium in their twenties will appear next to the brothers. After dinner, they will head down to the most exclusive clubs… Much like the Godfather movie. The girls will be agreeable to anything they say. I stopped and asked him. What do you mean go back with your brother? You know what I mean…with a grin. No, I will not do that. Then maybe we can have, you, me and her together.. Please convince her to stay, pleads with really cute polish gal.. He needed to be with the girl he dated for the evening so he can’t head back with me. I was a lunch date, I gathered all of the above, in a span of 1 day. £1000 popped into my coat after I declined.
Was it worth the worthless feeling I get.. I’m Gorgoeus, talented, smart, inquisitive and kinda found this bad boy high flyer persona to be irresistible. I give off too much of a sex appeal & led the whole meet into a physical arrangement. I was prepared to take the consequences however.. I never thought it would turn out like this.
You want the Don, you have it. Contact a Diamond SD who has a profile with a vague description of how lavish he is, where he go & where he can take you.., gets you an experience of a high class college escort or a Hugh Hefner playmate… It is quite the fantasy now that I think about it.. Perhaps I’d like to continue playing his game. My self worth is what holding me back… Then again, I’ve lost it. Is there anything for me to lose?
Can you play his game? How will you play it? Let me know…
I am looking to win.
@EllenSugarB – I actually said “some men lie to get laid” not “guys want to get laid.” In the future, if you are going to quote me, I would appreciate accuracy. I understand perfectly that both men and women enjoy intimacy. Thanks and bless your heart
@NC Gent: “….bless your heart” what a southern thang to say
I was a little disappointed with the questions in the survey. They seem image obsessed vs content focused.
Either accidentally or as a matter of strategy SA seems far more focused on cash for sex than many of the participants who are looking for a more balanced relationship where yes (just like IRL) there is a transfer of wealth from the male into the relationship.
@California SB – Your translator engine is better than mine. I went English to Russian to English and it was hardly recognizable but apparently the loss was in the Russian to English side.
@Flyr, actually it is grate compliment to me ! So my English is not that bad, YES !
And in the web dating it can bring problems.
And my posts so naive that you put me in college age category ! I hope all US college babes were so smart and experienced as I am. And you cannot imagine how autotranslate distort words. For example Sugar Baby translated as Child of Sugar, and vodka comment even I cannot understand . In you case, I also start suspict that I am man, not woman, coz I never literally bite girls here and offer my protection and avices.
But I am going to dissapoint you, 3 bloggers already have my personal info, including phone number
When I analize my posts, I see high maintenance biotch, and indeed I am,and this my feture impossible to hide. If you see something else – you are really bad in reading behind words
Midwest had some interesting comments on what the media has gotten right or wrong about sugar. I think what they have wrong is the “it’s all about cash” approach. I have only talked with a few other SD’s and perhaps four dozen SB’s over the years so it is not in any way a scientific sample and was affected by my criteria. My sense is that most are looking for something more than just money – mentoring, experiences, escape from beer pong addicted dating, respect, adventure, new friends, flexibility, rebellion, someone they can call with for advice or help, meeting new people and , as you can see from the passionate comments here, emotional involvement more frequently than one might anticipate.
Tina, my love, am I high maintenance biotch or not ?
@RussianSB: who says that high standards = high maintenance? I just think that you’re a woman who knows what she wants, and if you can’t offer it you don’t fit into her world.
I think that high maintenance is more of a description for someone who latches onto another that isn’t someone that can provide for what they want, but the person pushes for it anyway.
Your screening differentiates you from high maintenance. As I stated, you’re a high standards kind of lady
Видна́ пти́ца по полёту.RussianSB, you go girl! What is your degree in. Russian sb, for me have the stereotype of being educated,very intelligent, and mankillers.. is this true?
@flyr
As one clever man post here – Sugar relationship about money, sex and power. You can sugarcoat them and make look poetic. For me personally they are very romantic, coz that epoch of ball dances, courtesy, ladys and gentelmens going away with the wind.
BUT again as one clever man said before – mentoring, experiences, escape from beeng pong addicted dating, respect, adventure, new friends, flexibility, rebellion, someone they can call with for advice or help, meeting new people and , emotional involvement – as if all that you cannot get from non-sugar guys. Or if there is shortage in nice, good-looking, but well educated and smart broken guys.
@Honey Russian language much better, and she seet hings very deep
I is a MUST, Honey
My dad went to school for Rocket science, so of course he knows Russian!
I can read a bit, but polish is easier for me…. but I have many friends from (the)Urkraine… and I love Polish Chickens!!! Need to get some Orloffs chickens, maybe we can meet and you can find me Russian chicken!
I’ve always wanted to go to Moscow./St. Petersburg, seems so romantic and thrilling! and I need a a place to wear my mothers mink coat! I’m in texas and don’t travel to to colder places too often so a sable would be silly in Texas….
NC Gent- Oh boy. Ok. Sorry.
Has anyone ever flown across country for a first meet? Thoughts?
Yes, EllenSugarB, I have . Make sure he pays for everything , the tickets,the rental car, the hotel,etc. Do not spend a DIME of your own money on this trip. Too many sb have been stranded in a unfamiliar city with a shitty guy that wants ONE easy, exciting lay.He IS sending for you, right?
Ellen –
I agree it sounds exciting. However, ask yourself why he is flying you across the country, is there something that is so special between the two of you that none of the 30,000 sb’s who are closer qualify?……….Are his resources such that this is a very affordable whim.?……..
It does happen but as Commander Kirk would order deploy the full array of sensors……………..
Follow Honey’s good advice, before you leave you want a round trip ticket in hand and enough resources to get home. What will it cost to change the ticket if you want to leave early .
@RussianSB “As one clever man post here – Sugar relationship about money, sex and power. You can sugarcoat them and make look poetic. For me personally they are very romantic, coz that epoch of ball dances, courtesy, ladys and gentelmens going away with the wind.
BUT again as one clever man said before – mentoring, experiences, escape from beeng pong addicted dating, respect, adventure, new friends, flexibility, rebellion, someone they can call with for advice or help, meeting new people and , emotional involvement – as if all that you cannot get from non-sugar guys. Or if there is shortage in nice, good-looking, but well educated and smart broken guys.”
This ends the debate on what SUgar Dating is for me. Post this to the Media outlets and new Topic! ha ha ha!!
Brilliant!
@EllenSugarSB –
1. I entirely agree with Honey
2. I have before . A little over a year ago . Everything went amazing , we completely clicked, I stayed for 3 days ( yes, was intimate) gave the allowance we agreedon and we planned to see each other next month . Picked the dates and everything . Then when it came time to book the tickets , he started making excuses , and then poofed . So just be careful , when youre traveling that far , it gives them more reasons why a second trip might not work and it could turn into a one time thing .
@Ellen Were I an SB, I’d ask him to come to me for the first meeting and have him book a nice hotel near you–and, as always, meet first in a neutral place. If you hit it off, then sure, fly to him the next time (fully paid up front, of course).
This is what I expect to do as a respectful SD.
Hello Everyone!
Friday is here, Yippee!!! End of my working day even better.
Is anyone doing anything exciting this weekend?
x
@LV: I wouldn’t say exciting, but very comforting; it’s gray and windy and a little chilly here in Austin (high about 56 today) so I’m cooking some comfort food. Green Chili Chicken Enchilada Casserole, I have some rice to go with it, and chips with this AMAAAAAZING white queso…mmmmm! For dessert, it will be simple – a deeeeelicious agave nectar caramel with sea salt on cream cheese with cinnamon graham crackers….mmmmm!
For tomorrow, I think that I’ll just have to bake some apples, then put in some vanilla ice cream with that same caramel sauce mentioned above…..
Caramel has been on my mind lately…….
@VASD: mwwwaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Many special little kisses your way for being a respectful SD!
That sounds like a real treat Tina
You are making me hungry and I have just had dinner.
Post some of that great dessert to me please
And yes VASD sounds the true wonderful gentleman SD
Hi VASD Hope the week has gone well for you
@LV: I’m chowing down on the casserole now as a late lunch / early dinner and it is MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM! This is the first time that I’ve made it, so I was wondering how it would turn out, but I like it! And I’ll get about 6 meals out of it….I WILL have to share with friends, since I will end up getting sick of it before I finish it!
I’m sooo excited about the dessert……I LOVE this caramel sauce! It isn’t sticky, isn’t too sweet, just smoooooooooooth!
@Tina
0_o
That sounds delicicious. I have a spicy caramel sauce I’ve been waiting for you to try, lickably sweet, with just a hint of spicy.
Anyone know the words to Black Magic Woman by Santana?
@Tequila: you have a magic stick that needs to be awakened?
And it was delicious, although I haven’t hit dessert yet…..no roooooom……
x
@Tina
Actually, I do…but wake him gently…he has been known to be a pain in the ass.
@Tequila: who’s ass is the question, and did he knock first for an invitation?
@LV: thanks! Although people aren’t allowed in my kitchen when I’m cooking, even the (self proclaimed) king Tequila.
People just have to wait until I’m ready to serve!
I would sit in your garden Tina and await the invite. Enjoying the roses.
JATSD & Tina You two are terrible I feel like a gooseberry
Meant in the nicest possible way!
I was going to leave this one alone, but since it keeps being brought up, along with someone inquiring how personal dating affects ones aspect on sugar dating, what the heck, ill bite…
As if there is a shortage of “Nice, good looking, smart, well educated, broke guys.” I guess that depends on your definition of “nice.” Guys with these qualities who ALSO want a monogamous relationship leading to marriage are exceptionally rare after age 30. too many ‘easy’ girls polluting the dating pool, giving themselves up for nothing to guys who don’t give a sh!t about them. Also, I have found that in dating,, if a guy is “broke” he is going to have a hard time wanting to commit because he wont feel that he can support a family. Until I find a man who is really serious about being with me- I will use sugar dating to fill in the gaps. “Sugar Agreement or Marriage.” I’ve never been one to give it up for nothing.
Now I will chime in on how people think sugar daddies are rich white dudes….ok, well my first Real SD ever, before I even knew about SA, was a middle class, divorced, intelligent, tall dark and handsome man. And by ‘dark’ I mean Black. African American. (Me: petite blonde white girl) Never before had I dated a black man in my life. He treated me like gold, provided for me, was a true gentleman, and I never asked him for a dime-but he gave me everything I needed. No sex, he never pressured me, and i really car for him. I don’t think I would have stopped seeing him if it weren’t for the prejudice we experienced. Throw in a 20-year age gap with interracial dating -oh boy did I get some snide remarks, nasty looks of disapproval, and bad treatment. (no really, I noticed a distinct difference in how we were treated in restaurants. What the F?! This isn’t 1950!) Also, was it my imagination, or did black women give me the death-stare when I was with him. That never happened before or since. By black girlfriends said “if he was ugly, they wouldn’t look at you like that. It’s because he is good looking.”. Lol. I don’t get the death-stare from them when I am with a hot man 10+ yrs older than me – no, that’s when I get the death-stare from younger white guys. Lol lol
THANK YOU ALL for your advice on traveling for a first meet! I am going to take it slow and feel this one out. I told him that we are going to have to get to know each other quite extensively over the phone before I feel comfortable.
Twiceshy- You often times sound like my brother or my guy best friend when I read your posts. Always the contrarian
I might get some tomatoes thrown at me for bringing up race. Whatever. I can take it. My posts are long bc I just copy/paste this to my journal – therapy is expensive! I still go but this fills in the gaps. You guys are a great support network. And my therapist isn’t going to know how to give perspective on some of these things anyway. Thanks Again!!!
You are doing Great EllensugarB, You are telling YOUR OWN experience and yes, I’m sure you got plenty of looks!!
Thank you, Honey
. You’re post about chicks and thighs and breasts was SO funny!
You are most Welcome, EllenSugarB, I’ve always had a special fondness for blondes…lol!
@Honey, Moscow not grate for turism, 13 000 000 population, crazy traffic.
But St.Petersburg very romantic place, many turists, lot’s of excurtions, city with water channels, like Venus, it is too romantic to go without mr.Big there
@RussianSB: Mr. Big….I LIKE it! Future SDS beware, I will now refer to you as “Mr. Big”.
Tina, your dinner sound grate, it is better than sex !!!
@RussianSB: the best dates include incredible food AND incredible sex! Why limit yourself to just one?
Diamond…”Perhaps I’d like to continue playing his game. My self worth is what holding me back… Then again, I’ve lost it. Is there anything for me to lose?”
Can you play his game? How will you play it? Let me know…
I am looking to win.”
First, I am very sorry that you are feeling this way – thats not good. Anything that makes you doubt your self worth is not good – not at all.
I do not think that you can “win” anything when you feel worthless, Diamond. And if you really feel that way I would say it’s best to stay off the grid and get right with yourself. Stay true to yourself, do what makes you happy. If something is making you feel worthless, then it’s probably not good for you to be doing it and you should stop, now. It can only make you feel worthless IF YOU LET IT. Whats done is done, you know how it makes you feel, don’t do it again.
Game playing is a waste of time. There are better things out there…MUCH better things…but to use your words and line of thinking: If someone is causing you to feel that way, they win, and you are allowing them to win. The only way to “win” is to be happy, healthy, and feel good about yourself again. Keep healthy boundaries
Diamond – I have never watched the Godfather btw so I don’t really understand any of your references, but I will look into it out of curiosity..
but your comment … “I put off too much sex appeal”… BS! You can put off all the sex appeal that you want to. If the guy is too shallow to see past your sex appeal, then HE is the one missing out. You can’t help it if someone is blind! And it’s not your job to make them see, either. If someone sees you as nothing more than a sex object, sorry, but that says a lot more about THEIR character than it does about You. I’m calling BS on the “I put off too much sex appeal” comment. Put off ALL the sex appeal you want to. Have sex if you want to. Don’t have sex if you don’t want to. People who can’t see past the sex are missing out. Too bad for them! After reading your post 3 times I see nothing in there at all that should make you question your self worth. That guy’s lifestyle has nothing to do with your self-worth. It’s nothing personal.
@Ellen
Don’t let the world dictate who you’re with otherwise it will never change. If you liked this man and he treated you well fuck the rest. Too hard to find something good and right in this fuct world. It’s stupid absolutely redonkulous to let go of it when you do. If he’s a good man, and beat the odds to meet success head on, he deserves a good sb, woman, or whatever. I wont throw tomatoes at you about race…you saw my posts already.
@JATSD — Oh my goodness…I was a figure skater for 12 years, and for my first solo in our ice show I skated to Black Magic Woman. My dress was so gorgeous…still my favorite one! I think my coach hated me because I was always some evil character in the show…Black Magic Woman…The Wicked Witch of the West…Wild Thing….etc. He definitely knew I was up to no good
@Tequila: now you know you would at least try to throw fried green tomatoes at her, just as a fun little game to see if she could catch them in her mouth, and then chase them with a margarita
So see, you WOULD throw tomatoes, just in a fun, nice, flirtatious way
Godfather is a Coppola movie?! Wow. I met that guy at Inglenook in Napa at my little sisters’ bachelorette party. lol Talked to him like any other normal person and didn’t even know who he was. Figures. Ha! Too funny.
@Tina
I’m still waiting for the first printing of your book “Cooking Nekkid.” How much longer will it be? I heard it will have lots of pictures and it is an adult pop-up book. I still have all my recipes and cant wait to put it in and contribute. They are all very spicy but the pictures will sell them i’m sure.
Oh and by the way Drunk JaTSD is in control of the horizontal and the vertical so dont adjust your tv set.
-King Tequila
@Tequila: yes, it IS A pop up book, but the book isn’t the thing that pops up
As for how long? Very very……..
Well, at least we all know that Tequila is currently living it up in Margaritaville! No need to wonder “Where in the World is Tequila” for the moment!
@ContentSB
whhheeee…figure skate on over, Tina is cooking de gud fud le soir oui oui. Black Magic Woman jbrings all the bad girls out to play I see.
@Tina
I wouldnt throw them that’s wasting food. Frying them sounds great. Oh we could eat them raw in the raw. I’m game. T-minus bucket neckit in 5, 4, 3….
tina lol. I would eat those fried green tomatoes!
thanks Tequila SD, you’re right “f the rest!”
@Content: come on down girl! Even though we just got a cold front, I’m SURE it’s still warmer here than there!
and my food was sooooooo good! If I only had a margarita to wash it down with…..tsk tsk….
@Ellen
I grew up in the deep south. Some of the people there dont even realize that theyre wrong. Love whomever you please and love hard. If it breaks make sure it’s because of just you two and not because other ppl stuck their big fat noses into your marriage.
@Tina
I also have a pop up for your book. It’s one of the ones where you work the handle and it moves and does something special.
@Tequila: I’m sure your handle DOES have a few of it’s own tricks, although keep in mind that I have a few tricks of my own. Certain spices are not needed when Cooking Nekkid, as I bring a spicy flavor all my own
@Tina
And the live band here is playing dust in the wind…i think…and keep bringing me margaritas…this was supposed to be my last one but I drink one for you until you are speaking diffrerent language like me. GDE VICHERINKA? The party is here.
Puedo hablar Espanol mi amor
@Tina
I’m bringing the banana pepper. Use it in all your recipes…hole.
Whole. OOps.
I’m th
@Tequila: Freudian slip?
Maybe. I’m thinking I’ve been drinking. Must hurry and eat the fries before i say something stupid. and then get another margarita before i say something smart
Oooooh on my way! It snowed here for the first time this season a few days ago….I could go for some nice weather
oh… you wrote a lot guys.
Только я и SDinLA можем проверить русский язык “русскойSB”
@Diamond
You know there is good and bad in everyone, every group, etc. Try to understand that you are swimming with sharks, but it is not always a bad thing. The more money ALLOWS a person to be whatever they choose to be. Creeps become bigger rich creeps, and nice guys become married suckers. Certain types of people will find it easier to make money in certain ways. A true humanitarian will not make his billions in a ponzi scheme, and will not usually treat you the way you were treated on this date. And diamond members either have or want you to think they have lavish do anything you and I want money. (More like, you do what I want money.) Choose wisely, and glad you knew what your limits were before you got there. We all have to be ready for anything. Luck favors the prepared.
AnnaMw, want have you been up to? Can I be lazy and ask for what’s been going on with everybody on the Board and such,esp. the salacious stuff!!
RussianSb, I would be a tourist. It would be funny with me buying the russian nesting dolls and vodka and maybe a fur, and jewlery! Silver is cheaper in New Mexico, Rubies and sapphires in India.Singapore,Tahiti pearls.RussianSb, I go to the source and ask if any good Alexandrites are still coming from Russia, I heard the mine has closed…What is good to buy in Russia?
Night everyone. and EllenSB be careful out there..lol!
@Ellen
From your own mouth:
Stay true to yourself, do what makes you happy.
It’s not about what makes other people happy outside of the two of you. If you two weren’t harming anyone, live and let live. This was a divorced, successful, REAL sd that didn’t pressure you for sex and gave you whatever you wanted?
You want me to say “redonkulous” again? (Like on that Disney movie.)
@ Flyr “Вы могли бы только жить в общежитии колледжа в северном Висконсине и смеяться надо всеми нами.” I am glad I am not the only one having this feeling
@ RussianSB: I have a question, with how many men off this website did you actually meet? Since I am from Europe, I guess we would have the same “target audience”. So I am just curious. And what was your experience like?
@Honey
what’s been going on with everybody on the Board and such,esp. the salacious stuff!!
2 or 3 back to back “interesting” blog topics we’ve had. Probably starting around “Entering A Sugar Daddy Agreement” when someone mentioned penis size as part of an arrangement requirement and gaining strongest momentum in “Sex & Sugar: WTF Sex Tips And Erroneous Zones”. It will surely decline as the blog topics turn to Keeping Sugar Through the Holidays, What do you want from Sugar Claus, and New Sugar Resolutions for the New Year.
@Tequila “Sugar Claus!!!” LOOOL!!!
On the other note, I just got the message from the cutest guy ever on here. And, judging by his profile, genuine too. Was one of those “no expectations” messages just to tell me that he likes my profile…
DAMN, why I am not in the States!
Agrrrrraaahh!!
@Treasured
Have passport will travel….if you want to.
Not going to work.
But, damn, the guy is a cutiepie
@Treasured
then bring him to you. nice new avatar by the way…not that anything was wrong w/the old ones
Thanks
I decided I am bored of being blonde, so decided to change the hair colour. But still, the closest and dearest say that you can change the hair colour, but not being a blonde 
For me long-distance thing won’t work. Somewhere in Europe – yes, anywhere further – no. Well, maybe NY.
I can be free only a limited a mount of time, and 18 hour flight simply is not worth it. At least, not regularly.
@Treasured
Definitely understand. Distance can be very tricky.
@Treasured “For me long-distance thing won’t work. Somewhere in Europe – yes, anywhere further – no. Well, maybe NY.
I can be free only a limited a mount of time, and 18 hour flight simply is not worth it. At least, not regularly.”
*scratches another off his list*
*whispers quietly to self* One day…one day when I haz the private jet…
>:-)
@EllenSugarB “Twiceshy- You often times sound like my brother or my guy best friend when I read your posts. Always the contrarian ”
OMG!! NOOOOO!!! #Friendzoned .
Friendzoned on a blog. I give up.
Time to re-invent myself….
@Honey, nothing good you can buy in Moscow, everything double priced here. For example nice looking set of nesting dolls – cost 500$ (thank you, Honey, I always been curious how it called in English, in Russian – MATRESHKI). But Russia impress people a lot.
And remember, Honey, we have very cold winters for you. Now is October and we already have snow, little one, not big snow… but whoenjoy the sightseeing with blue nose ?
@twiceshy Oh my
Didn’t know I have a secret admirer on the blog 
@twiceshy: aww, you’re cute! You go get that private jet! Get those SBs! Sick’em!
And yes, distance CAN be a disappointment….
@Content: It’s only in the mid 50′s here, brrrr! (hehehehehehehe – that’s just a tease for you, since that temp actually IS chilly for here!) The good thing is that we’ll be back in the “normal” range quickly – mid 70s….ahhhhh…..
@Tresured (Preciosa) have the best Russian ! Ta-tam ! Oh, Sugars, when I will relocate to Palm Beach with SD of my dreams (from that Wisconsin den) you will be balm for my nostalgic soul.
@Tresured, ”target group” marketing not working here – I am alive proove. Becose every SB and SD are unique. I recieve REAL invitation for travel-date once a month. First meet wasn’t ok – but it was my first web date experience. Now my screening process is perfect.
I cannot wait to meet my potential in November. I invite him to the blog, tell him my nickname, for he read my secret thoughts and get ready for
hihg-maintenance biotch I am. The attempt to scare him out failed ! And now he is writing for me his own very romantic blog (he is Italian). Will be lots of Russian – Italian drama, I hope, and I imagine us breaking dishes all the time
In Erope no borders anymore, and you have those TJV (or TGV?) trains, so EuroUnion now one big country, I think it is very romantic to have date in France or Italy and travelfor that, but always use SB travel tips, please
So, for me , very long distance work grate, it also add romance and adventure in relationship. My the best sugar travel partner was long-distance. As long as I fly, and not go by boat it is only 10 hours to States, I work part time and very serious about arrangements, so, sometimes I am more real than Wisconsin college girl
Tina, feels like you are tropical girl, in Moscow -2′Celsium (don’t know Farenheit scale yet).
Half year in the blog and I will know EVERYTHING. And you will learn Russian,my friends.
@RussianSB: I used to live where there was snow in the winter, and very cold temperatures. Then I moved to Texas, where the summers are just a little hotter, but the winters are SOOOOOOOO wonderful! The winter here is like spring in most places
For Celsius to Fahrenheit conversion: 9/5C + 32 = F (hence 0 Celsius = 32 degrees Fahrenheit)
Today I was favored by handsome guy with red eyes, I call him red-eyed devil
GOOD MORNING, AMERICA
where are you ?
Tequila sleep, he has hard working day yesterday, but where other 50 States ?
Oh,Tina…we are left alone on that planet…
thank you, so -2′Celsium = 30 Farenheit ??
I love spring, and I have a deal with Texas SD to meet after one year if we both still will be available. Wild-Wild-West…
Anyone like to hang out tonight? (:
And I am sure that we will be available, coz nothing is more constant, than temporary situation (try to translate from Russian failed !)
In London. xx
@RussianSB: right around 28 to 29 degrees F, yes. And I don’t know, I’m sure someone else will pop into our little world shortly – they always do!
@AsianSB
I cannot remember which of the other blog sbs/sds are your neighbors, but it is Halloween weekend so there’s probably a party in your future somewhere.
first time poster – long time lurker! I am giggling because it is due to the media that I came upon the concept of becoming an SB. I was reading an article on the ‘net about “strange ways I make money” (or something of the sort) and a SB mentioned this site. I had heard about other sites, but I’m a mature baby and they seem to be geared towards the twenty-something college student. I have to say I’m in a pretty desperate situation as many of you are — but I am by no means desperate. I’ve often considered becoming an escort because 1) I like sex and 2) I like eating and having a roof over my head. My very first “Sugarcapade” resulted in an SD wanting a p4p arrangement. Bam! There’s your sign…
I realized that when actually presented with the possibility of becoming and escort, I morally can’t do it. But that’s just me – I actually admire women that can have sex for sex’s sake (or money’s sake); however, for me, I cannot bring myself to sleep with someone unless I am attracted to them. (Or I’ve consumed a lot of tequila….)
As I said, I’m in a desperate situation — come next week, I may be a homeless SB. But you can damn well bet that I will be the most elegantly dressed, impeccably groomed, and sweetest smelling homeless person I can be! I’ve done a lot of things that I am not proud of in my life and I’ve my bad judgement has lead me to some crazy situations but the beauty of this first SB/ SD meeting was that I really and truly figured out what exactly I wanted from this arrangement. I want a hand-up, not a handout and I see my pot arrangement to be one that leads me back to my own path in life. I’d like the sugar to be the cherry on the top instead of the meat and potatoes of my finances.
Okay – WAY too many food references…off to seek some Halloween treats!
Sugar kisses –
Hi Everyone
How is your weekend going?
I see you have a master plan for travelling RussianSB. I love to travel and cant wait for my holiday in November. Yippee!!
Last night was good. Oktoberfest! Lots of beer! Lots of dancing….well I *watched* other people dance crazily, and in conga lines. Was fun.
Tonight might head back to Oktoberfest, or just stay in and do quiet stuff. i.e. play video games/watch movies lol.
Not getting into any Halloween parties this year.
@twiceshy: oooh, what kind of video games? If I get the promotion at work that I interviewed for this week, I might just have to get a few new ones (I’m a closet junkie!)
RussianSB surely a nice warm mink coat will keep me warm! When is it summer, with good weather?. Thanks Tequliasd for the update! I’m more of a working woman than a sugarbaby these days, need more time, no time to do eveyrthing..SD wants to go on vacations , I want to stay with the chickens, I need to get him a girl on the side, so I can work! lol!
Oh, Honey, you DESERVE
vacation,
from work even horse can die (another try translate Russian wisdom).
Mink coat look fashionable… but it is cold for winter, fox is better.
Those August was really cold, so I lost now feeling of summer. Usually June, July, August is summer, and everything else slowly starting(ending) winter, just now big snow begin, and even November not start yet.
Definately I hibernate all activitys till summer.
Only Sugar or Sunshine can motivate me to wake up !
St.-Petersburg same weather. But almost whole June is ”white nights” 24 hours day light.
Soooooo… I’m getting on a plane in 7hrs. Bought my own $700 one way ticket to Houston to go on a first meet for lunch. I packed enough clothes for a month! Lol. So, this guy either trolled me on this blog -pretty sure he trolled me on this blog, but whatever- and came up with all the right answers, or he just intuitively had all the right answers, or (god help me) he is actually genuine. Ive never flown to meet someone before and I am actually excited! I figured, hey, ive never been to Texas, what the heck you only live once! If we don’t like each other, whatever, I’ll go sight seeing in Houston and fly home. Wish me luck!
I wish you luck ! I hear high humidity in Huston. Stay dry. Hope your intuition works good.
There’s too much bantering on the blog to keep up…
@EllenSugarB
“Bought my own $700 one way ticket to Houston to go on a first meet for lunch.”
Really? Say it ain’t so!
Guru.
)
If he trolled her on the blog, (whatever it means) and she is going to Houston – then she is save
Ok, since I do have a major hangover and a flight back home in a couple of hours, not a very long post.
Yesterday, or, actually today, I had a first real life test with my long standing friend (I don’t really feel like calling him a Sugardaddy, he is a bit more than that. That is the same one, who’s invitation I accepted after dumping my previous SD for being a liar.)
Basically I got slightly drunk… I do not do drunk often. Actually almost never. And absolutely NEVER in a presence of my admirers. But last night was a night when last glass of Champagne was a bit too much.
I am reasonably well behaved when drunk. Like normal me, but with an extreme urge to go to sleep asap. And, of course, I am obviously drunk…
So last night, the mentioned person, delivered me to my hotel room, tucked me in, waited till I fall asleep, gave me a kiss (I think, or was I dreaming) and let me sleep. I am really impressed. And even more so, I do know that this is not the last time I saw him
Actually this whole trip was quite surprising, and definitely made me realise that me and him are in on another level… Sorry, don’t want to give out too much information.
@Russian – For me very long distance doesn’t work, as I am studying, work part time and am a mum. So, the most I can get away is for one week or 3-4 days every other week every month. It is not worth spending more than 6-8 hours of flying to be with someone for 3-4 days. And I am just being realistic here.
@Ellen – That is a bit crazy, but Huston + a gentleman from this blog combination rings a bell, and if it is who I think it is, it might be worth taking a risk
. Unless he fooled even me. But I do not think so. But I DO hope he gives you back the ticket costs..
@Angel – Never rely on a SD for you main income. Sorry about your situation, but SD will not solve your problems. He might aid in making your life more pleasurable/enjoyable, but he is not a saving boat to get your life back on track.
I am off for the week. Am uber busy this week: my youngest sun will be 3 tomorrow (party on Saturday) and 4 tests in my uni.
TequilaSD.
I do understand you.
What do you want me to say.
))
If you r asking me if I’ve had sexual relationship with a guy with a different than my skin color – yes, I did.
was I ever in love with a guy with a different skin color – yes, I was.
Do not tell me I avoid answering tricky Qs.
@Angel. Re my previous post (since I wrote it way too early in the morning). Glad you realise that a SD should be exactly just that – a cherry on top
Guru “say it ain’t so” haha … Right? SO not like me- but I just got a good vibe and I feel good about this one.
Treasured – eh, maybe he will reimburse me for the ticket, maybe he won’t. Honestly, I’m not too concerned.
Obviously I’m excited since I have to wake up in 2hrs to get to the airport and I’m still up! All I can say is that I have a good feeling about it, and even if it doesn’t turn out, whatever, at least I tried.
By ‘trolled me on this blog’ I meant that this is my suspicion. I literally sent him a two word response to an initial e-mail, and he resiponded with a 5paragraph full analysis of ‘who I , Ellen, am…and what I want’ and he was spot on. Sure, he could be one of those people who are eerily perceptive – but there were some specific data points that he knew that I have written here…so I just figured he found some way to connect the dots.
I need advice!!! He is going to pick me up from the airport (I already have his ID, and did a full background check, have gps tracking on my phone where my parents can see whe I am and do random spot safety checks ) and we are just going to lunch. So my question is…Should I get a hotel near the airport to take the pressure off? I am just trying to get to know the guy, so I don’t want it to turn into an awkward house guest scenario -or, as Midwest put it way back ‘turn into a complacent affair.’ guys, ive NEVER done this before. So I’m just wondering if getting my own room will take the pressure off and give us a chance to decide we like each other without having to stay in the same house. Please let me know what you think. I was going to say ” hey, I got a room near the airport. So, if you wasn’t to hang out again after work tomorrow you can just let me know. Otherwise, nothing personal, I can just head back home.”
Any input is welcome!
I am pretty sure you will be fine
But, having your own space might be a good idea. Not because I am particularly worried in this case that something bad might happen, but because I you might feel more comfortable that way…
And, if it is who I think it is, he is very perceptive indeed… Also very smart and is able to link things together
I wouldn’t call it “trolling off” though
Have fun and enjoy the experience.
Enjoy your adventure Ellen and lunch. I hope it goes really well.
The question about a hotel room. I would book my own so that reduces any pressure on yourself about having to find one last minute.
Book one that you can cancel up to the last minute on the day and you have covered all bases.
Enjoy
x
@Treasured
“Have passport will travel….if you want to.”
I was talking about you traveling to see the cute email guy when I said this. I think you already understood that, and I think I was sober at that point.
@Ellen
I know you are probably on your way already, but another good idea is to see if there are any blog sb’s in the area you’re going to. Then, if your sd is busy, or anything, at least you’ve got a blogmate/acquaintance in the area to party with perhaps.
@ILoveWestCoastGirl
I admire your versatility, but in your original post it just sounded like your friends made a big difference in if he was white or non-white for this being a good idea for no condom. If I misread your intent or the intent of your friends then I apologize.
Ladies, interesting read… profile # 1225773, wow, I am speechless…
Serendipity! Ellen, I’m in Houston! Message me please..,BLOG GODS and GODDESSES, please trade our emails.
Beautiful and adapt RussianSB, Now I HAVE to go to to Russia! Will have to spend at least three months,Start in JUne for my birthday and to see the Northern lights that I am sure will be a once in a lifetime experience. Next year I go to Vieques , Puerto Rico, where they have natural glowing water, then I will BEGINNING /BEGIN to plan my Russian trip. Last sentence is wrong English, RussianSB, Can you spot it? Then I will ________ to plan my Russian trip. What is the better word to use? I want to say that I will start to plan for my trip to Russia. I am a know it all teacher and I would like to see how good your English is…lol! and I freely admit to being the biggest nerd in the world!
You already spot my bad English, Im not gonna proove you nothing, Honey-Bunny
But I always was interested in words more, than in grammar.
From the blog I know BTW,BS and WTF. But I still don’t know what LOL and IMHO mean.
In St-Petersburg you not see northern lights, but the day light illusion from northern lights.
@RussianSB LOL means laughing out loud. That is you are happy and laughing about something you have read or seen.
IMHO means in my humble opinion. In other words, this is what you think but you are not forcing your opinion on the other person, and you don’t think you are 100% correct.
Ummm… I can’t see a situation where you would ever use this expression. ;-P
@Ms.Romantic – That profile? Axe murderer. RUN RUN!!!
@EllenSugarB best of luck! Those arrangements are the type I get involved in, except I buy tickets and pay hotel. It’s worked out in the past, the biggest risk might be if you miscalculate and you don’t click so it doesn’t work out.
@ russiansb
Lol. Laughing
IMHO. I my humble opinion. However usually indicates anything but humility
@russian. Love your comments
@EllenSB: have a BLAST in Houston! It’s a little too big of a town for me to live in, but it is DEFINITELY fun! Soooo many cultural things to see! (But if you like weird, Austin is the way to go. Just sayin’
)
@Russian: Ahhhh, I think you need to visit twiceshy to get away from the cold. Again, just sayin’ (see twiceshy, I TOLD you I was rootin’ for ya! hehehehe)
@Guru: WHAT? YOU are having trouble keeping up with the blog??? (hides under table and looks out for falling pieces of sky) And you never did answer my question / supposition I posed to you in an e-mail…..hmmmm…..
Ellen.
You are lucky Honey is in Houston.
If this Sd wrote your big letter, he is very verbose
you have all his back ground checked 
why would you need a cheap hotel room next to airport.
Ellen if it is the Texas blog SD with MD degree – you are very save , you can sleep in his house in a different room if you do not “click “.
If it is someone you completely do not know ! then I do not think you would have bought $700 ticks and fly.
if you really!!! want an advice – make it clear , do not do games.
@Romantic
“Woman get crazy and follow me all over the world and every woman I have ever had a relationship with never date again and simply wait for me to ask them back.”
OMG!!!
Is he FOR REAL??? I would say the next stage of this mental illness would be “I am Caesar – all bow”.
@Tina I play MMORPGs. I am playing Guild Wars 2 right now and I also have a few characters in Rift, which I enjoy. I picked up Forza Horizon. I love car racing games and simulations. I usually play games on my PC, Xbox 360 is reserved for Forza racing
Annnnd….I’m actually maybe probably hooking up with an SB soon. We are in the messaging stages, did a few phone calls. Things seem good. She isn’t turned off by the traveling and actually after the phone call seemed happy and went straight to when could we meet. But we know how these things go, so until we actually meet I’m in wait and see mode. But it’s a bit exciting ^_^
I’m also doing some “traditional” dating, but the general gist of a “no strings attached” conversation crashes the entire mood when things get going
@twiceshy: You’re a gamer after my own heart, even though I haven’t had much of a chance to play lately!
Good luck with the pot!
@Ms.Romantic, thank you, oil executive monk with huge*** – it is just what I prey about, it was silly of you put his profile number here. Tina have a look at # 1225773 (it is cool to have such a glamorous matchmaker as you). I think, we just born for each other !
Seriously, they think we THAT stupid, girls, it is War !!! Only diamond members should be allowed to write BS pofiles. What we going to do with him , girls???
@ Russian – you know what, I am actually going to contact him
And play him around a bit 
If he answers, of course 
@RussianSB: HAHAHAHAHAHA! I love the profile! Especially the misspelled words! Teehee!! “in love making get extatic for days but then end up stalking me” BAHAHAHAHAHA! Sorry, that’s the curse for having a self proclaimed huge ****
Oh my….there’s something to be said for having self confidence in your profile, but THAT one goes just a liiiiiiiiittle too far!
@Treasured @MsRomantic @Tina
Be careful. I may have seen this guy at the Pimp-Monastery right before I left. When I was in charge, we focused on spelling as well as “big d*** kung fu.” You see how these new Pimp-monks just don’t even take the time to use spell check.
@Twiceshy
Most people reserve IMHO for those moments when you feel very strongly about your opinion, while at the same time trying not make others feel like you’re pontificating. Of course this is simply my humble opinion on the use of IMHO.
Sorry if someone has mentioned this already, but the photo for this post is so awesome.
Also, since there is mention of silly guys, I’d like to point out this fake who tries to convince you he is the owner of the third largest media/advertising conglomerate in the world (I don’t think he realizes we can do research on the internet).
He’ll tell you he’s from Greece, but he only logs in from Canada. According to him, he has to use his Canadian cell phone to use the internet on the beach. I reported him, but since his profile is still up, have fun!
1181750
Thank you, Janine.
@Treasure ,we can make him crazy together with silly slow-thinking letters,but what if Twiceshy is righte ? And under huge*** monk mean huge axe ??
I think it is joke and he never will answer.
Janine, that one already been blocked in my profile !
@Guru What’s up my brother ?
I return to the sugar bowl after a harrowing breakup with my cherished SB of 1 1/2 years. There are several reasons for this but they did not involve infidelity or loss of love . i miss her so badly I can hardly breath from day to day.
@elizabeth sweet: I believe was talking about getting a reliable SD who could be counted on as a long term guy. And many of you were dissing guys for being tom cats. I harped on and on back when I was posting about monogamy and how I expect to give it and receive it . I never once was tempted to sign up another sb even though we had a few challenges along the way. Elizabeth ,they are out there but you do have to take a chance on sleeping with a guy you think is perfect and he flakes on you .That is the risk we all take . So take that chance anyway . If you did your due diligence thoroughly the worst that you will get is laid .(STDs notwithstanding)
@Jezebel If you love your SD then by all means tell him! My SB told me about 5 months into our relationship and it opened up a whole new arena for us to enjoy. Love is grand as long as you both know the boundaries My SB told me that I was never going to be her forever guy because of the decades age difference . I accepted that and enjoyed her love and adoration anyway.
@schoolteacher (?sp) I think ,said that we are all kidding ourselves if we think this activity is not prostitution. Cudos to her for stating the obvious .I ‘m not being critical ,but am just calling out those who deny that simple fact . Most of us are exchanging sex for $$$,plus some other tangible and intangible things .
Today, my friends, I learn a lot of new words,and one matching the best our blog -
sandbox !
@ Treasured
Let us know how it goes if you contact him, I was scared to reply to him, lol!
@RussianSB – did he ever try to talk to you? I’m usually cordial with denials, but this guy was too funny. I can’t believe he thinks women will fall for that. Everyone should block that guy after getting a good laugh out of him.
And yes, this is the best sandbox, even thought I don’t play as often as I watch
Janine, I think, he did, and I don’t block funny profiles, I think coz some not funny reason.
The oil executive you guys have been talking about, who posts 20K monthly allowance, says on his profile:
“So I wait in silent expectation of what is to be the most wonderful romance that one could ever imagine. Do you have the courage to let your heart fly? ”
Big red flag right there. He is looking for Cinderella. Sorry buddy, this is the 21st century. We are looking for real like romance, that can last max of a good ten years to raise our babies and collect child support and alimony after. Romance was good in 1350 where princes fought for their beloved ones. Today, I’ll consider myself lucky if I find someone I can be faithful for 3 years. LOL LOL LOL
Had a blast as a bunny at the Halloween party. Spent all my sugar cash in a weekend. Made me feel guilty though. Probably there are families who would live off that money for a month.
Ellen… I’ll give you credit for your outrageous feat of paying your own ticket to fly to meet someone in the middle of a storm. Hope you will get lots of $$$$$$$$$$$$$ out of this!!!
@VA Gent — Long time no see! I’m so sorry to hear about you and your SB…I know how much you adored her. Breakups are never fun…if I could give you a big hug right now I would!
@VA Gent: I’m so sorry for your current heartache, and wish you the best in healing! You truly are a gem; I always hope that you find more happiness along the way, and that you cherish the happiness you have already been blessed with.
Smooches and hugs your way!
T
Has anyone ever drawn up a contract with their SD?
For instance, he gives you a certain amount for say 3 visits per month? And if either party breaches that contract then it’s off?
Sir Lancelot !
you are back ! Blowing 1000 kisses !
from thousands miles away
I agree with VA gentelmen :” you do have to take a chance on sleeping with a guy you think is perfect and he flakes on you .That is the risk we all take . So take that chance anyway . If you did your due diligence thoroughly the worst that you will get is laid . ”
It is the best screening tool, can save a lot of time and efforts
I mean some serial daters will wait 30 dates to get laid (including dinners with 5 your hungry for oysrers girlfriends), and after they poof anyway.
And one time I decide to have sex just for sex, and it brings me very responsible SD.
And two years ago I met SD who help me a lot already, but was reluctant to get laid, he enjoy more romantic dinners, going out, or just teasing me till I push poor boy to boomboom. It was nice strategy, I think
@CaliforniaSB and @Everyone
it’s all about perspective.That’s why beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Romance is whatever makes you feel like you could want to be in love (or already are.) Love, however, can take on much less glamorous forms. Too many good relationships are ruined because people can’t embrace both sides of love. Then you add in other people’s opinion and it can turn into poison.
@VA Gent
Sorry for your loss. As a romantic, I hate to see it. When you are ready to say what happened, I would like to know where it fell apart, if you didn’t mind of course.
To Russian SB.
You were asking me earlier for this special photo and!
I happened ! Only 6 days in this site and I got the penis photo! Yes, this site works.
@CaliforniaSB
My last post was in response to the “try for 10 years, go for alimony, go for child support”. So after you do all that, do you get married and do it all again? Or do you just go out f***ing and drinking everyday til you’ve forgotten everything and are good at pretending that you don’t feel anything? How do you really win this game? (Sorry, it’s my binary thought process again, but I know you can appreciate this.)
“JustATequilaSD
October 28th, 2012 at 10:17 pm
@CaliforniaSB
My last post was in response to the “try for 10 years, go for alimony, go for child support”. So after you do all that, do you get married and do it all again? Or do you just go out f***ing and drinking everyday til you’ve forgotten everything and are good at pretending that you don’t feel anything? How do you really win this game? (Sorry, it’s my binary thought process again, but I know you can appreciate this.)”
Why do I feel like I know both of you???? haha
“I think ,said that we are all kidding ourselves if we think this activity is not prostitution.” So you were in love with the prostitute? Wow.
@EllenSugar — Lol… VA Gent is notorious for igniting the always heated “p4p vs. sugar” debate….but we love him anyway
Let the dead horse beating begin!
Wow, what a long day! I flew in and out of Houston in a day. I don’t think that i will ever fly to an SD for a first meet again. It takes too much effort. I told him if he wants to see me again he has to fly to me and we can spend more time together.
For the record, he did reimburse my travel expenses.
Thank you all for your help and advice!
haha content … as soon as I posted that I said to myself “oh sh!t…delete post! dammit”
@Ellen — I’m glad to hear your quick trip went well! Was he as genuine in person as you were hoping?
Just A Tequila SD – I wanted to say thank you for all of the things you said about not letting others opinions get in the way of your personal relationships. There have been a few times in my life now where I let that happen and it’s really a shame, because they were also great friends to me and I pushed them away. I recently reconnected with some people from my past because I thought a lot about what you wrote. So again, thank you.
Content- He has a good heart. But I am pretty sure I caught him lying about how much money he makes, and I didn’t like how he made it. And I don’t like lying.
Not the first time I haven’t liked how a man made his money. If it involves deception, I don’t like it. I mean, c’mon, even a prostitute can make money without being deceptive. lol
Oh no! Guys lying about their income?!? Next thing you know there will be girls lying about their age! Say it ain’t so!
I don’t like liars either but I’ve been told it comes with the territory.
@VaGent, sorry to hear about you and your SB.
@EllenSugarB, by “lying about how much money he makes”, do you mean the income listed in his profile? That is pretty par for the course, either up or down. If my SB ever actually asked how much I make I’d tell her it’s none of her damn business.
Hi Tina.
Hi VA Gentleman — I was wondering where you went. Sorry to hear about your breakup. It took me a while to recover from my first long term sugar relationship even with a very amicable and agreed upon ending (she graduated, got a real job and wanted to look for a husband to have kids with). Hang in there – you know you can always get some lovin’ here though
@Content — I almost took the “bait” on the prostitution topic – thanks for reminding me about the “dead horse.” Go Packers – an ugly win is better than a pretty loss!
@EllenSugarB — I am glad things worked out for you. I have had a pot SB fly to meet me, but I always buy the ticket and hotel room in advance. You trusted your instincts and it worked out. BTW, I always lied about my income on my profile – I put less than my income because, like Phone Guy, I felt it really wasn’t the SB’s
business.
Quick reminder that VA Gentleman and VA Gent are two different posters — VA Gent is the more recent of the two to join us – sorry if I am stating the obvious
I hope everyone has a great week!
@ILoveWestCoastGirl – lucky you are, 6 month on the site and no one p…s picture,
nothing. I am patient, I will wait
I look like Kassandra, they think it is not safe send me p…s picture, coz I will curse it forever
@EllenSugarB,
So how did you catch him lying about his income. What is your evidence?
@RussianSB
Your avatar pic is sooooo cute!
@Ellen
I’m an optimist and a romantic. Save the world thru LOVE. I have had so many heartbreaks. But every time I try to become jaded, someone gives me a new perspective. It is good that you tried to reconnect with past feelings. Just be sure you do so under the right reasons. If they hurt you before, it’ll probably repeat again. And regarding prostitutes, they are people too. Even though I technically try to avoid the ones that blatantly advertise…on the street…showing me their boobs as I drive by. LOL. (Still caused me to pause, rubber-necking, and I noticed my foot was hovering in between the brake and gas pedals. Boobs are just so magnetic, I’m sorry.)
@NC Gent
“Go Packers – an ugly win is better than a pretty loss!”
Yeah, that’s what the Seahawks said.
@Ellen
Only one day in Houston and then a turnaround. No wonder you’re tired. And you were thinking about too much. Is he going to reimburse me? Will I have to run from him and hop right back on the plane? Stress stress stress. May I suggest trying not to be in such a rush next time. If you pay for anything in the future, just understand you may not get it back. Also, the more comfy he can try to make you…the better for you and the arrangement. Regarding his income, under 100k SD’s contain some realistic, and giving SD’s. They may or may not offer you the moon and the stars, just make sure he gives you something and doesn’t subtract from you. And I don’t just mean money, the way he interacts with you. If all he has is one crust of bread, it won’t work either. But if he’s the baker, you can still be happy even if you don’t get pie all the time. (Sorry, I’m hungry so my analogies are going that way.) This guy lied to you, I can understand that completely. Did he attempt to tell you the truth at any time? (I’m just curious)
@RussianSB
I would send you a p…s picture, but I can not find a camera that is big enough.
Hi PhoneGuy! Long time no chit chat! You naughty blog absent SD!
@NC Gent: Yes, I know that VA Gent and VA Gentleman are 2 diff people, but I was being lazy, and figure we all knew who I was talking about
@Tequila: Just gotta try and start a riot, dontcha?
Tequila:
How do you really win this game?
You don’t win dear! After the divorce you start all over again for another 10 years and keep doing it until you hit 60 and settle!!!! The algorithms of marriage…
Whohooo!! LOL
Ellen:
Hope you got the sugar $$$$$$$$ you deserved for all your traveling effort. Was he handsome? Big c*ck?
“keep doing it until you hit 60 and settle” hahaha I crack myself up LOL LOL LOL
@Cali: you could always tell Tequila to “just keep swimming swimming swimming…..” he would get it
Hi to all my old friends ! I just had to throw that old and tired “P” bomb back in the fray . It looked like you all were getting a little too tame .
My ex SB was on SA a few months ago so she must have found another since she was off pretty quickly. If I told the real story she would recognize me pretty readily,so for now I won’t. Maybe later . If one of you is lucky enough to hook up with her then you are a lucky guy.
So how are my hot and sexy girlfriends ? The best cure for a broken heart is to fall in love again. (Sorry Guru, I know that is a nono )
@ VA Gentleman: Well helloooooooo there! *wink wink* Tame? THIS group? Puh! And sometimes the best way through a heartbreak is to have a distraction until you’re ready to deal with it. Sorry Guru, I’m going to have to disagree with you about this one!
@Tequila, I choose the avatar, coz it is winter avatar and I have snowball on my head.
Next week I invited to party full of Sugar possibilities, but I want stay at home and not go out till March. Why I need if I getting my potentials and tickets spending few hours a week on SA ?
@Tina, VA gentelman become a pride, he forget about his Sugar family and strong blood-sugar connection, becose of one windy girl ?
@RussianSB: well, you KNOW that men can get VERY distracted with a good SB
And the avatar is for Halloween! YEAH!!!!
@Tina
Maybe I am trying to start a riot. Everyone together now “PAN-CAKES! PAN-CAKES! PAN-CAKES! ” (Ah another quote from one of my fave movies.)
@CaliSB
Algorithms are my thang! But of course, I always like to make sure that I’m using the proper formula to get the proper answer.
@RussianSB
Would the party SD’s be closer to your hometown?
@JaTSD: Oh, so you wanna start a riot? (shakes vampire minion booty at you) HA! Take that!
@Tequila, party will be few blocks away. I just wonder how lazy I am and what stupid reason I will find not to go
We just party Halloween , everybody love to jump in fancy costumes, but we not do candy part. What did you say , candies or life ?
@Tina, are you in Coppola or Bram Stoker Dracula costume ?
@RussianSB you won’t go to a party a few blocks away but you would fly around the world to a beach?
Re: Falling in love
For the record, I’m not against falling in love in the sugar world. However, I’m against those who fall in love and then complain about the consequences, and do it over and over again!
Awww…Guru DOES have a soft side! Who knew?!
Tequila: Talking about algorithms… sometimes I wish allowances were exponential. LOL LOL
@Tina
Ahhh, the 70s.
I would sing the Shake your Booty disco song but I don’t know how many of my blogmates would be able to sing along
@RussianSB
Do you want these men to see your hot Marylin Monroe Happy Birthday song?
@Twiceshy
Jumping on a plane for arrangement has higher chance of a successful meet and greet than a block party down the street. You will screen it differently, and potentially know what to expect, who to expect, and what is expected of you. I find most parties to be just a random everything. Some days I like random but I prefer to know what I’m getting into. Of course, if you ever run across me at such an affair, I’ll be that M&M shouting “Oh, it’s THAT kind of party!”
@CaliSB
From what I’ve heard, some of them are…negatively exponential. At least based on some of my blogmates experiences where the excuses kept getting bigger and the allowance got smaller.
`@ellen “Wow, what a long day! I flew in and out of Houston in a day. I don’t think that i will ever fly to an SD for a first meet again. It takes too much effort. I told him if he wants to see me again he has to fly to me and we can spend more time together. ”
My suggestion is that you consider the SD’s view of the world. If he’s working 60-80 hours a week it may make sense to both of you for you to do the traveling. In addition, many unmarried SD’s do much better in their man-cave and that may be to your benefit. Translated – don’t get stuck on stupid, think what’s good for him and great for you? Strive for that. ……………………….
“Translated – don’t get stuck on stupid”
that was nice.
Anyway…
ElenSB.
Why it was a Big deal/ turned off for your how a SD makes his income .
It is not like he is a drug dealer or a pimp.?
I do understand The lie was a bigger turn off.
no one is 100% honest (yes, unfortunately even guys who claim “I am 100% honest , kind hearted …” ).
I am Not 100% honest with SDs or pots I can not open up to a complete stranger right away (even after 3-4 meetings you r strangers ). But I do not lie / claim “I am 100% honest …”
” trust has to be earn now days ”
@Va gentleman : your love story reminds me of the man I love. He is decades older than me but I truly love him. We did not meet through sugar but he lead me to search for what does an arrangement mean, How and what do the people look for in the arrangement relationships… Ect… I have been learning through reading profiles, blogs and talk to the SDs… but have not dip my toes in the sugar bowl yet..(I have been thinking.. Maybe the arrangement would fit me more than just stay completely single… I don’t see myself settle down with a marriage any year soon… )
I miss him and still am in love with him but can not do anything about it. I would trade everything to be with him again and would communicate better about what it should be between us and willing to compromise… but I think he doubted my love… I had my flaws all over as a lady in love. It was not my decision to end our
relationship. I hope he is happy and well now, but still wish he would be generous enough and come back to
me again… As for love is hard to find… I’m waiting for him with open arms and heart. Wish, wish!!!
I hope you well and happy with your choices!!!
Oh wow! long time lurker…new poster. I am an sb in Houston too, and I just moved here! Would love if the blog gods could pass my email along to other HTown SBs!