Don’t miss this Sunday’s issue of the New York Times on SeekingArrangement.com
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Hey all! I need advice.
I met (2nd date) with my new SD on Monday night.We had a great time! We went to dinner, a poetry reading and then a jazz club. At the end of the night we went to his place where he was a perfect gentleman. We haven’t even kissed yet!
We made an arrangement. He agreed to transfer funds to my account monthly.
I gave him the info needed on Tuesday night. He is aware that I want it before the 15th. I haven’t received it yet. I do not want to pester him as I fully believe he will do this but I do have a deadline to meet (April 15th -you all know what that deadline is)
How long should I wait before I ask him about it?
Mon – date
Read the article… And I’m really not sure what to say… I have a small opinion on one (probably rhetorical) question, though: “Is there, somewhere, some cultural wistfulness, cloaked in judgment?”… I think so. I mean, people are so interested in the lifestyle because deep down they want it. It’s like people that watch fantasy movies, they wish they could be there, but don’t think it’s possible or appropriate. Like walking around in leather and slaying bad guys with katanas…not appropriate… They feel the same about sugar dating/mistresses/or anything not deemed “proper” by society. Those are just my thoughts on the matter…
Read most of the article but started glossing over two-thirds of the way through.
Honestly, I am tired of the influx of people trying to summarize the life(style) by interviewing a small handful of individuals. As we all know, through experiences with both pot SD and SB’s on this site and others, there are a FEW QUALITY SD/SB’s that understand and respect this ‘type’ of relationship. For the most part, there are individuals with their hands out, SB demanding a wardrobe of expensive clothing and the SD’s expecting to be able to drop a little cash on the nightstand while traveling through town.
Reporters are looking for a controversial topic on which to report and, if they dug just a little deeper they may be able to provide a little bit broader of a perspective and not their own jealous opinions transferred to paper.
*putting soapbox away*
This article is the same old stuff we hear all the time about sd dating, negativity. It will for sure draw more sbs to the site and make the competition worse.
Good morning everyone. I slept late and am well rested. Going to meet my family around 11 to go shopping with my daughter. My inbox is still empty so I guess my 2 potentials are history.
Angela I would keep check on that transfer and don’t lose contact with him. I guess i’m a little paranoid but I never trust anyone till they do what they promise. If I had a dollar for everything someone promised me something, well I’d have that versace bag, lol
Gotta take out the trash now and get some coffee.
Good Morning All,
I have been on and off different SB sites including this one and I had a general question for the group. I have had a few SBs that have lasted a while and often they leave their profiles up even after we say we are “going steady” lol, in a SB/SD sense. In other words, we’ve discussed being exclusive from a SB/SD standpoint. What are your general thoughts on this? Should a SB and SD agree to take profiles down, or should they just trust eachother – that one or the other isn’t going to bolt for something better. I guess this gets to the idea about NSA. Are you really NSA if a SD has paid a month’s allowance up front? Thanks.
Good morning Jack
I think that once exclusiveness is established, then both should hide or take down their profiles. If one is seeking more than one sd or sb and it’s agreed on,then it’s ok to leave them up. That depends of course on allowance. If an sd wants a sb to be his , he needs to meet her allowance requirements.
As far as paying the allowance upfront I will say what I have said many times. When a sb makes the first move and gives of herself she takes a greater risk if the sd turns out to be a fake. If the sd makes the first move with the allowance, as he should, he takes a risk but after all he is rich anyway and probably won’t miss the money if he is really as wealthy as he claims. IF he is worried about losing a few hundred dollars, then he isn’t as wealthy as he claims.
Good afternoon Jack and welcome. To speak to your question, I believe that if the terms of your agreement are to be exclusive then absolutely she should take down/hide her profile. If you have discussed NSA then it would be unrealistic to ask this of her.
Quite honestly, me personally, even if I my SD has indicated NSA I will typically hide my profile simply because I cannot (choose not to) juggle.
Depends on how often you plan to see each other….it could mean she needs additional financial assistance. There are many factors to consider.
I guess I am unclear too on whether you are NSA or exclusive?
Jack, if your girls agreed to be exclusive then didn’t remove their profiles, it could indicate a few things. I could mean she didn’t know she had to hide it, assuming it would just lapse. It might mean she believes you should trust her, as you mentioned. But the likliest scenario is that she had no intention of being exclusive and didn’t think you would check, or perhaps, care.
Absolutely it can be NSA with money involved. If something went awry and your SB turned out to be not what you thought, walk away, there’s not contract. There is that saying: Don’t gamble anything you can’t afford to lose. There will always be untrustworthy people around, maybe these sites have a concentrated number, but instincts work wonders……
Nico…..good point. I was seeing NSA differently in my mind, your version is much more clear…..lol.
And, like you, I prefer to hide my profile once I have found him. I’ve tried juggling in the past and it’s like a second (and third) job.
Took your advice, Lisa. Two feet on the floor. Riiiiiiight over to the coffee pot and the laptop in he kitchen. Progess!!
Jack~ I leave my profile up so other SB’s can see who they are talking to on the Blog. It is a matter of choice, trust and good communication. I think that the question is one for the individual SD or SB that you have the concern with. I got a C- in mind reading 101 in college.
OC ~ they offer that as a class?? *kewl*
good luck if you find it girlie…..I typically skip over them
Jack – if she agreed to be exclusive, then she needs to take her profile down. Same for you if that is what you promised.
NSA – I always laugh when the term NSA is thrown so loosely about. If there is money and sex involved, there are always some strings some place or another.
Angela – If you don’t have the funds showing in your account by lunch time on Monday, give him a very polite call and remind him. Truthfully, if he agreed to things with you on your first date, then he should have shown you he was serious by having the funds in your account within 24 hours of giving you him the information.
If you need to police that a profile is taken down you may have communication or trust issues to face. If you have the discussion and search to make sure it is deleted. Hmmm that would scare me. Also, just because you have or dont have a profile up or visible does not mean you can not be lured away. That is a moral issue, your word should be enough. Having visibility is not alway the intent to look for others.
Agreed OC but I also think that just taking the initial steps shows a certain amount of trust. It is difficult, given the amount of distrust and uncertainty and it is just a step in the direction to show your SD/SB that you’re willing to commit the time, sans distraction, toward the possibility of creating a strong(er) bond with them.
Now, I understand you’ve not hidden your profile and you’ve very active on the blog, as is SE, and you two have developed a level of trust etc; however, if it were somebody you barely knew it just might give them an initial sense of security to see you took the steps to back out of the ‘scene’.
Hi Nico! Happy Easter! Are you working on plans for your second date? It is cloudy and rainy here in S.Cal today. But I am sooo looking forward to a day off. The weekend could not have come soon enough for me.
I dont know how I feel exactly about the profile thing. It is an individual thing. Without trust, you got Nuttin. Why would you be with a sugar you felt could not trust. Trust does build, true. I could debate this bad boy all day! lol
Where the heck is Gail!
A young lady from the desert says:
“interested in pleasing male friend who is generous in nature.I can converse in four languages or can not converse at all if desired.Have remarkable looks and abilities.”
Woo Hoo Nitemare….perhaps you could capitalize on those ‘abilities’
Herro OC ~ I love a good debate but alas, as you say, it is an individual thing. Happy Easter to you too. As for the second date yes Next weekend and I am either going to his side or he will return to mine. I am returning to a store we visited over the weekend because he would like to me try on a dress we say. If I like then I am to call him from the store for him to buy for me *feels spoiled*
We talk daily too….typically he will call me and, since work has been painfully slow lately I have the time to give to him and we usually spend an hour on the phone. I charged my cordless headset so I could multi-task He is a great guy and really enjoying myself THANK YOU FOR ASKING
She sounds very versatile, Nightmare.Nothing says fun like a silent interaction.
Glad its not just me, Nico. I don’t even know what language those posts are.
Picking a dress shall be fun! Even better when you get to wear it for him later!!
Nico: That is wonderful news! Describe the dress for me. Can you see yourself in it?
Ahhhh, the dress. It was lovely and very simple. It was a yellow sundress (yellow compliments my skin tone) and it was halter style. It was simple and understated. He was the one to pull it off the rack and hold it up…I put the halter strap over my neck and held it to my body (as close as I got to trying it on.)
It just felt good and I certainly didn’t expect him to suggest going back to get it. It is the nice unexpected things like that to make me melt *swoon*
Same desert, different town…
“Hey, first of all thank you for looking at my profile I hope that you like what you see, and that we can have a great time.”
That’s the entire desc, so i figure first of all covers just the thank you part, and the rest is second and third of all.
NM…comedy in the desert, it seems.
I read a funny one last night that said: “you will be subject to weekly weigh-ins” great, like Vegas show girl act!
Nico, sounds lovely and summery. I think women who can wear yellow are so lucky…..such a happy color!
Eat a really big meal before you meat that guy.
Should I email the one with the occupation of model that wrote “I’m really not photogenic at all” as the first line of her desc?
I’m clearly not his girl.I have a pretty hedonistic approach to indulgences and the thought of giving up red meat and wine for 10lbs is a very unfair choice.
Email the model!!
Hello all Sugars!!! one day smoke free and going nuts!
NitemareSD~ she’s not photogenic? HELLO she;s a model? lol
Nice~ nice! i love summer dresses!
Hi all – rainy and cold here, watching the home opener for my baseball team. While I am a diehard fan, I have to say I’m glad I’m not at the ballpark brrrrrrrr
LOL NM you def should email the model – thats priceless
Angela, I agree with SouthernGent2 on your question. He SHOULD have sent you the money right after you guys discussed everything, but I guess, since there was a deadline, just wait until April 15 rolls around.
I read the article, and I must say, it IS the same we’ve read over and over. I’m hoping my New York Times does better.
Those are Russian crylic I believe. Just copy/paste and go to Google translate to figure out what may have been said (I say may have because some things don’t translate directly and as you all know, sometimes phrases in a language other than English can be out of context from our perceived interpretation.)
First post translates as such:
“Interestingly and poznovatelno, but something more on this topic?”
OPOV, my guess was Russian to, as it looked like something an old coworker of mine used to write….unimportant I guess. I just wonder if the poster knows none of us can read it.
Hi all. I’m not that guy’s match either, girlie! “I’m not going for sumo wrestler, pal, but on the same token don’t hold your breath for my 125lb clone.”
I sent a few emails while at work and will resume tonight. I won’t lie, I was a wee nervous going down that list…
Come on ladies, there must be some real good ones written by the guys too…
Lisa, hope you enjoyed being with your daughter and seeing her get the things she wants. Did she get that iTouch?
Hi everone, Hi Nitemare
Just got back from a day with my daughter. Met her teacher at the mall to go over the college grants info. Have some problems there because since she doesn’t live with me and I can’t claim her on taxes, my parents finances have to be considered and since they live on social security they have no tax forms for the past years. Sure hope she can get those grants without having to give out too many details about our family issues.
My daughter got her i-touch and some clothes. We went to eat at a buffet so i’m stuffed now. Had some issues though with my mom and daughter threatening to tell my married lover of years wife on us. My daughter said she is going to call him (they did a bunch or research when I first met him 4 years ago and even had a detective following me when I met him, this is the reason I had to move out away from them).
If they cause problems I will have no one.
Nightmare, not one of the girls, but I did see one of another sd’s profile that caught my attention.
His come on phrase was “Looking for a toy!”
OPOV I think I saw that profile too
To add I haven’t heard from my lover in over a week, he hasn’t answered any of my emails which is not like him because we’re in touch almost every day. I wonder if my mom and daughter have already done something.
Here’s something for the No Sexoes to consider adding to their profile, stolen from a perfectly nice young lady…
“Disclaimer: Please do not confuse this for a sex-for-hire arrangement or discuss it with me as such — I would much prefer spending our time in classier establishments than county holding cells and I imagine you would, too. “
Lisa- I wouldn’t think so far on it. It is a scary thought, but I don’t think something could have happened. And I believe your daughter will get the money she needs to go to school. If anything your parents’ info should help her get more grants.. she wouldn’t have to pay those back. I know it’s uncomfortable to share all the family secrets, but trust me.. financial aid people have seen it all so they’re not going to judge. They just want to know how much money your daughters is going to need.
Is it just me, or are the profiles getting a little stranger with each passing week? Mine almost sounds pedestrian…
I don’t know but I’m getting more discouraged. I will send a nice Easter greeting to the two sds that had contacted me and that haven’t wrote in the past 4 days. I thought I was actually going to meet someone this time. It’s been so long that that I am nervous about doing it again as I’m so outa touch with it. Might be time for me climb back into my shell for another 10+ years like I did before.
I’m glad I am not the only one who saw that. Did you also catch the one that was looking for a “diamond in the buff”?
OPOV i’ve seen that one too, he’s been on here forever. I joined last may and most of the ones that were here then are still here. then there’s Hugh E rection, saw that one awhile back.
OPOV, was that a SD by chance, or SB? Either way, their freudian slip — and profound ignorance – - is showing. [boy, I have a long journey ahead...]
From the SB files, there was a girl who put in her profile that as an added incentive, “I am REALLY into anal, too!!”
raine, it wasn’t a slip.
[I'll be ordering that netbook tonight after all.]
If I ever decide to date again, I am going to lower my standards, and then I am going to lower the girl’s.
hum browsing the newest members for my city I see a familiar one has returned. The one that contacted me a long while back. He is the one that travels to Houston weekly and wants to meet for a couple days a week, stay at the sb’s place and is very generous with 500 a month. Sounds more like he is looking for a low cost hotel with benefits than a sd. I wouldn’t want someone at my place hanging out 8 days a month. Let alone 500 dollars.
OPOV~you’ve gotta be kidding?!?! wow i can’t believe some people!
hi all Sugars!
Hi, BG. Yeah, unbelievable. [insert eye roll here]
Hello BG. What surprises you…they boys, girls, or both?
OPOV~ i think the last girl you talked about
i know one guys profile i read was unreal,,, it was very explicit in his demands!
OPOV~ the profile that he wants a toy too!!!
Hi everyone. Just walked in, went with a friend and daughter to see Slumdog Millionaire. Lots of tears…..
I might have been the last person alive to have seen it.
I just saw the header with something along the lines of “big $ for big juggs” and while not the same guy, thought of a funny one from about a year ago, before I left. A “lovely” gentleman emailed me a few times and eventually asked if I would consider getting implants as he liked larger breasted women. I politely declined as I’m CLEARLY in need of smaller one, not vice versa. He suggested then that my previous SD give him a reference letter……haha
So, this leads me to the SB’s profile I saw a couple of days ago that is….ummmm…..beyond busty. Has anyone seen that? Pretty lady.
girlie~ i never saw Slumdog Millionaire so,,, you’re not the last one on earth!
it doesn’t seem like i movie i want to see
Hi girlie I seen that busty woman. Very pretty woman but I wouldn’t want to have to deal with that, lol. Also she keeps showing them and says she’s looking for someone who can look beyond that. That’s kinda hard to do I would think. Like having a eye in your forehead
slumdog millionaire does not interest me. I have seen one movie in the last year “confessions of a shopaholic” as I identify with Rebecca Bloomwood
BG….it was so good. I always wished I could walk around in a sari, so this was really to feed my obsession. Turned out to be lovely and sad……I’m so glad I went!
True enough, Lisa. Then again, it’s not like she can even downplay them in any way with a baggier shit. They literally go should to waist. I can’t imagine because I struggle with all the cute fashions I miss out on. THAT is nuts!
Just saw: Looking for something that makes my heart beat.
Obviously just forgot a word, but I giggled.
Hey Sugar family!!!
I have an URGENT question for you all!
So, I am going on my first date with a SD…what should I expect? What should i be looking/asking for? Are there any boundaries I should not be testing?
I am normally really comfortable on first dates, but this is a whole other level, and I don’t want to act like a total idiot!
I know , it;s like she is a chest, legs ,and arms. She would do great in the porn industry but not sure how she could find someone to like her for her and not be after her chest.
I wouldn’ want to wear a sari. Being married to a muslim and seeing how the women are dominated, I dont’ want anything to do with middle eastern or Indian culture, woman are not treated as equals in society.
hey….why isnt my picture showing up? hmm curious.
KissmySeoul~ you should go to the blog search , you could get a lot of help there, When i was wondering something someone suggested it ! it was really helpful
since i haven’t been on a date yet!
KissmySeoul~ for the pic on the little thing, you need to go to en.gravatar.com
Lisa ~ indian culture isn’t the same as muslims, in india they value women
KMS….I say just to treat it like a regular first date. Just relax and see if there is chemisty there. I much prefer this way, and while it might be too much like regular dating to some, I’d rather not get into all kinds of heavy detailed discussions unless I can really enjoy someones company through an evening.
That said, during the first date I like to find out if he’s ever had this sort of non conventional relationship before. It will help you decide your next avenue…….
I meant to see the movie myself before all the buzz kicked in.
Welcome to the blog, KissmySeoul. I’ll direct you now to everyone else (and the blog archives)for your inquiry…
I knew some Indians one time and the woman were dominated by the males in the family. Told who to marry and all. They also have caste systems and some think the poor are that way because of something they did in their past life.
I gotta go now. It’s 9 so I gotta call my friend and see how she is. She couldn’t get the title for the car she bought last week because the woman that sold it to her didn’t own it and has left the country. I knew it was a mitake for her to spend all her savings on that car when she only makes 600 a month in income. Now someone at her apartment complex has slashed all her tires so I guess she’s back to riding the bus for a while. She left me a message when I was out earlier. Her free minutes start at 9 pm.
Have a good ngiht everyone. I gotta get up early and work tomorrow but only till 1.
thanks guys! i will keep checking this til “the date” on monday
P.S. I have been to India, its amazing, beautiful, and I had no problems at all while there.
KissmySeoul: Welcome! You may want to try to formulate what it is YOU are looking for in this type of dating. Sugar dating is fun, but you need to define your own boundries and goals. Try to be flexible and use your best guy instincts in your search. Your first date? Remember safety first and never go somewhere without letting someone else know. Try to find out as much as possible about the SD before going. You need to have a STRONG comfort level prior to meeing him. Use good common sense.
The lady with the bigguns (as Al bundy would put it) is a dancer that tours the country and escorts on the side. Reading her profile, I have to ask that if she wants someone to look beyond her bra size why did she get basketballs inserted under her skin?
Why would anyone do that to themselves? Do they really think men (or women) find that attractive?
OC~ that’s right i totally forgot about all that, i guess i just worked way to hard today…
And there are horrible men in every culture/ regligious backgroud. My ex has a Muslim father. He is lovely to his wife. And I have several Indian GF’s (what stunners) with partners to die for. That stereotype is dependant on so many things.
Sorry to hear about your friend, Lisa. I hope this gets resolved for your friend.
BG….how goes the smoking?
OPOV~ yeah lots of people this it looks great, personally i don’t like implants at all, a friend of mine has them and yes i touched and it doesn’t feel the same, it’s so unreal and blah!
girlie ~ you mean the NONE smoking! it’s hard!, yesterday i was so hyper couldn’t sleep and today i was like that all day until about 9 pm… now i have a headache! but then again i hadn’t had dinner too so!
OPOV…..I forgot Al Bundy used to say that!!
How does one dance and use a pole with those, seriously?
Great point, OC. I always Google my date prior and leave info of where I will be with a trusted friend. I hope i am not the only Googler
BG!!!!! That’s SO great!! It will pass, the worst is over!!! Yes, overusage of exclamation points but I know how hard it is!
Yay for me lol, i just want to stop for good now!
Hey, I just Googled myself and a reference to me shows up on the first page of results. I’m somebody. As my kid says, YeeHah!
And that criminal matter shows up nowhere.
OPOV~lol criminal matter???? hummmm i’m intrigued !
Just a little T-I-C
tongue in cheek
Good evening sugar land!
Got some extra chocolate eggies here…anyone want some?
Got dark, got milk…get ‘em while they last!
Would someone PLEASE come and help me eat these eggies? I’m making myself sick over here!
SuzieQ, hi!! I must admit, I saw your profile and I just signed up for pole classes! A GF does it and she has never looked better. Unfortunately,
I have to wait a couple weeks as another friend going with me has a leg injury. Until it heals, we wont start. I can’t wait! Have you been doing it long?
So why is it that most men are able to stop after consuming a reasonable amount of chocolate, but us girls just don’t seem to have an off switch? Now *that’* a cruel joke!
SuzieQ~ i would but you live way too far for me to go get one ! and i do work tomorrow!
how you been girl!
Hurray! I’m no longer alone with my chocolate eggies! Hi Girlie!
Yes pole dancing is a blast. I’ve been doing it since 2005….taught myself on the tetherball poles at the local elementary school and haven’t looked back since.
Hi BG, nice to be back. I’ll send one to you via the SA transporter…here it comes!
It’s been a crazy week and I’m just back from a wonderful day of visiting with family. I have the entire weekend off and am not sure what to do with myself.
Besides eat all the chocolate eggs I received!
OPOV~ i’m still curious as hell to find out what happened!
I love Chocolate~ thanks SuzieQ~
you can come work with me? if you got nothing to do , from 7 am to 5 pm get ready lol
Hmm, chocolate for work? That doesn’t sound like a very fair trade!
I’d kill for some too! They are the best part of Easter.
I love that you taught youself at an Elementary school!!! It looks hard!
SuzieQ~ just trying to fill up your day tomorrow you did say you didn’t know what you were going to do!!! i’m just here to help you do something,
so go and get on a plane and get your ass here for 7 am lol
Got some coming your way girlie!
Lots of people tell me, you make it look so easy. I tell my students that making it look easy is what makes it such a great workout lol!
I always tell people I only do it as cross training for triathlon
BG I think I might just take you up on that if I could…I need more spontaneity in my life!
But I’m supposed to be getting ready for my first sugar date on Monday….might take me all weekend, it’s been so long since I’ve been on a date!
SuzieQ, hi! [insert squee here] I have this weekend off too, but still have to work.
SuzieQ~ your gonna be fine!!! i’m sure your gonna have a blast and everything will be fine!
when ever you wanna come just let me know!
In awe of you, SuzieQ….Pole to triathlon. Wow.
Off to bed, belly full of popcorn. haha.
Raine~ girl are you reading your book???? i hate being the only f**ked up, gonna kill someone for a smoke on here lol
BG – with me? Like I said, just TIC. You can’t have securities licenses with a record.
Easter chocolate? That’s not real chocolate. Too much milk. As to why men don’t eat or enjoy chocolate as much as women, there was a report that came out a while ago that suggested chocolate interacts with a woman’s physiology than that of a male. I think it had something to do with that thing that is special to women.
I believe the only time men LOVE chocolate is it it is drizzled on select parts of a woman’s body.
Can someone tell me how to keep msn from opening when ever it wants!!!
i closed it 15 minutes ago and it’s back on…. i tried everything , i’m a real computer blond! even the other sugar forum is still a mystery too me, what the fuggio is a forum?
Well to be honest I’m getting a bit nervous about the whole thing…I haven’t heard a peep from him since Tuesday, and I’m supposed to be getting on a plane on Monday. I don’t yet have a ticket nor a room confirmation so I feel a bit like I’m in limbo.
Whenever I email him he always gets right back to me, explains what the delay was, etc and springs back into action, ie sending flight itineraries. But rarely does he email me first, even though he initiated contact. He is married, and his job sounds very demanding, but are these guys really *that* busy?
He genuinely seems interested, has given me all the info I’ve asked for and has checked out legit as far as I can tell. But I don’t like the feeling of having to keep emailing him…I don’t want to come across as needy, which I’m definitely not, but I want to feel confident that everything is being looked after and we are moving ahead according to the plan.
What do you all think?
suzieQ~ i thought it was next week , not this coming monday! wow yeah he should have given you all the details and schedule and everything by now!
if it was me, well i’d mail him one last time and ask, and if he didn’t finish taking care of everything then i’d wait to see, but that’s just me!
I’m debating that BG….the ball is really back in his court though. He last emailed to ask if a particular flight itinerary would work for me and I replied that it was fine and to let me know once it was confirmed. That was Tuesday evening and I haven’t heard anything since.
At this point I think I’d feel really uneasy if I had to chase him down. I think I’ll leave it and if he wants to make it happen he will get back to me. If I don’t hear from him again then I guess I’ll have my answer.
you know what i just got a mail from a guy on another site lol, he sent me his pic, lol up close and personal with his little friend, and yes i said little even up close, a pic of his penis!!! ha hahahahahha killing myself laughing lol
Just what I needed BG – a little comic relief
that sucks SuzieQ~ i so wish he contacts you !
i should give you my password hold on it’s in you mail k
I’ve just polished off the whole bag of Lindt milk chocolate eggies….maybe this situation with my pot sd is getting to me more than I thought!
BG: A forum may or may not be a blog (actually, more often than not many are; don’t quote me on that one, though). I haven’t restarted the book yet, but I know I’m on my last pack. I’m getting annoyed with the whole thing, especially the paying nearly 8$US/pack part.
Suzie, I don’t know what to tell you as I just started sending emails.
SuzieQ~ log out when you done lol it is so funny you have to press on the key and then accept the pic lol too funny
raine~ yay!!!! i’m not gonna be the only crazy non-smoker !
raine~ i have no clue how the forum thing works i’m at a total loss, i can do normal stuff and documents but the rest is all a mystery lol
why would someone send his photo of his little friend??? do they actually think it’s cute?
SuzieQ~ did you get it! lol
BG – LOL!!! peekaboo!
OPOV~ would you send a pic of you dick to a girl you never met or even talked too? and why would you even think that its something i want to see?
SuzieQ~ did you get it?
Ahh, to breathe straight and have a few extra bucks back in my wallet again. My smoke-stained queendom for a netbook…how’s that for crazy?
raine ~ everytime i want a cigarette i start dancing lol, i danced the night away last night, thank god for Ipods lol
SuzieQ~ is it me or is that not something to be proud of? it’s small !!!
Sorry BG, took me a minute to figure out how to access it. But it was worth it for the laugh…you’re right, why would anyone do that? Certainly doesn’t turn my crank.
Maybe a lot of guys think we get turned on by seeing their naked body parts….I had a relationship with a guy like that once. If he wanted me to get all horny for him he’d wear something that I once commented on that I liked. But what he didn’t get was that it’s really hard to get turned on, no matter what he’s wearing (or not), if he’s not committed enough to the relationship to get a job and contribute financially to it, or to help out around the house, or to otherwise show he cares about more than sex.
I’m not with him anymore
oh yeah and i did make muffins and little cakes too , i can’t sleep when i stop smoking… tonight i’m thinking banana bread and maybe fudge squares lol
April 10th, 2009 at 11:24 pm
OPOV~ would you send a pic of you dick to a girl you never met or even talked too? and why would you even think that its something i want to see?”
No, not me. I’m Irish.
I can’t even form a complete sentence on that. Just ick.
Oh wait, I have something now: he couldn’t expose himself in person like normal crazies, huh?
SuzieQ~ 4 inches isn’t something to be proud of and sending out pics of it lol
it’s so small, maybe the camera added a few pounds too lol so maybe it’s smaller!
BG,I have an awesome recipe for chocolate peanut butter cookies…when I visit we’ll have to have a bake fest. And go dancing. We’ll have so much fun it’ll keep your mind of the cigs for sure!
OPOV~ do you have an Gaelic accent???
BG – LOL! If the camera added a few pounds he’s in real trouble!
raine do you wanna see lol i’ll send you the link lol
SuzieQ~ if it wasn’t peanut butter cookies i’d be all over the cookies, i don’t like peanut butter sorry but yeah bake fest and dancing let party girl!
SuzieQ~ they always say it adds pounds lol
Ok no problem, we’ll skip the PB and make them chocolate chocolate cookies. I happen to have a few spare chocolate eggies here that we can use
OPOV~ i’m sorry we are bashing this guys dick lol but it is small! and i just stopped smoking so … all excuses i know lol
OPOV~ you don’t want to say if you have an irish accent??? i really like accents, mine is french so ….
SuzieQ~ yay chocolate yay !!!
BG – so you speak with zee french accent, no? Que romantica! Oh wait, that’s Spanish. I love all accents!
Chocolate is my friend. Especially when I have a legitimate reason….like Easter. Or Christmas. Or Mother’s Day. Or birthday. Or Friday. Or Saturday. Or….
No. It was a joke. Again, just a little TIC.
You know what they say about Irish guys, don’t cha?
Tell us do OPOV!
SuzieQ~ i go insane for accents , european accents , russian, croatian , Irish , hey they just need to talk and i’m ready lol
not much of an accent but yeah some words i guess, but when i was in LA i got pulled over by a cop and the french accent was so helpful he even gave me his number lol oh yeah and i’m blond too so i was blond , stupid and french lol
OPOV PLEASE DO TELL ME!!! coz if you got an Irish accent… call me! lol
Irish curse. Google it.
Googled OPOV…so you’re saying we should cut this guy some slack ’cause he’s just suffering from a touch of the Irish curse? Never heard that before LOL!
OPOV~ i stopped smoking you stop drinking we’ll be ok lol if you have an irish accent that is! lol
“also known as “The Whisky Dick”, the Irish Curse is the inability to maintain an erection due to excessive consumption of alcohol”
irish curse , too much drinking results in no erection or small dick!
Curses! I gotta get on an actual pc to view this foolishness! Oh, waaah…
raine~ are you still looking for it!!! is it too small! lol
raine~ you can’t see the pic????
teehee Hi guys. definitely fun to read through this blog tonight!
Katherine~ hey yeah i’m hyper and smoke deprived so …
I wish it were that simple (funny though); the site was modified for my bb, and there were no images or icons! Dang.
Hi Katherine, care for a chocolate eggie? While I still have some left? They’re going fast!
oh yeah! I saw that somewhere in the blogs yesterday. I was lurking hehe. CONGRATS and I hope you can keep it up!!!
Hi Katherine. BG, you’re not smoke deprived, your oxygen intake has been restored!
awwww i LOVE those! I’d adore one hehe
so are any of you having more luck on the SD front?
I’ve got a meeting with a pot tomorrow… but we’ll see. I HOPE. Cos this one seems like a gem. I sure hope he is.
Anyway, BG, back to your original question, no I would not send someone a pic of my privates, even if asked.
raine in a day in a half??? no i’m just normally crazy just using this as an excuse lol JK! everytime i stopped smoking before i get all hyper and giglly and i don’t sleep for days, as i said before baking in the middle of the night with my iPod!
SuzieQ, you didn’t mention they were Lindt chocolate eggs. I got each of my girls Lindt bunnies for their baskets. I love that stuff, though I’m partial to the truffles. yummy
OPOV~ Nice to know, but now my question is, do you have an IRISH accent???
Well I’d hope not OPOV, ’cause it might end up turning into your publics!
No a NY accent.
Katherine~ i’m taking a break, jaded really!
Got one for you too nawti….catch!
OPOV~ your in NY, i’m not far Montreal! i haven’t been to NY in a long, long time
Katherine~ good for you a SD date that is awesome!
yeah. ’bout time, eh? lol. like I said, we’ll see.
OPOV how’s your searching coming?
oh, belated thanks haha, sorry..
You’re one of the more modest ones, OPOV. I just don’t understand that whole concept…
Yippee and keeping my fingers crossed for ya, Katherine…
*claps and catches the yummy treat from SuzieQ
It says “irresistibly smooth dark chocolate.” Watch out nawti, it’s true! Good thing I bought the small bags and not the huge ones!
modesty or braggadocios?
I hear ya SuzieQ. The only way I can manage portion control with good chocolate is to only buy it in small portions. Otherwise…it is just not possible…
Evening, nawti; snuck in here while I was typing, I see. Wait a second…lindt has bunnies? The hell have I been?
Oh yes,they have bunnies! I’m glad I stuck to the little tiny eggies though!
nawti…I don’t know why I cannot control myself…if the package is open, the whole thing must go into my stomach. Good thing I burn it off easily. I sometimes think the only reason I race is so I can eat more chocolate! LOL!
Oh… you have much to learn grasshopper. Lindt has many bunnies, little baby ones that are like 5 to a pack, bigger hollow ones, and even white chocolate (which really isn’t chocolate IMHO). And I was just quietly lurking and reading raine, but SuzieQ had to go and mention chocolate Lindt eggs and I had to come out of hiding. Hee hee
Well SuzieQ (even your nickname is a yummy treat!), I might as well just apply them directly to my thighs, which is why I only get them sparingly! LOL
Ooooh, I’m yummy! Did you hear that gentlemen? Thanks nawti
I didn’t know about the eggies either. I need to grab whatever’s left…
the braggadocio/sending the naked pics thing. All kinds of ick, the latter. Not a prude, really, it’s just…is leaving something to the imagination too much to ask nowadays? Dang, I mustn’t overthink this time of night.
Hmm, apply chocolate directly to body…sounds like fun to me. Now I’m feeling nawti lol!
I’ve got a wonderful product in my studio boutique…I call them misssters. My favourite is chocolate truffle…I call it the calorie-free PMS cure. It’s distilled water with organic essential oil of cacao. You mist it on your face, in the room, in your car, on your sheets (at least this is my special fantasy!) wherever, and it has this intense chocolate smell that is TO DIE FOR! And NO calories! I’ll bring some to the next sugar party.
If you go shopping on Monday raine, you can probably find lots of 1/2 price bunnies.
Guess I will turn in for the night. I was painting a good portion of the day and now I could use some sleep. Hopefully I will dream of chocolate bunnies! ha ha. Good night all you yummy sugar babies and Sugar Daddies (see, we are all sweet!)
Now you know how I got my nickname SuzieQ *wink*
All this talk of chocolate has got me thinking of a warm flourless cake.
As Homer would say..mmm chocolate cake. (I’m in a Fox tv mode this evening).
I knew lindt had truffles, but all I’ve seen were the standard-issue slabs, er bars, of chocolate. I too consider white chocolate a contradiction.
Nite nite nawti….sweet dreams!
Chocolate party at OPOV’s place!
I gotta turn in myself: got last-minute easter stuff to attend to. Bidding all a good night…zzz. [insert test pattern here]
Nite raine, sleep tight.
Anyone else out there? I’m wide awake….too much chocolate I guess!
OK, guess I’ll go knit something.
Let us not forget SUGAR MOMMY … they are rare, but valuable and desirable.
Update on funds: He is setting up a Paypal account. (I remember when I set mine up it takes a few days to verify info so I’m not stressing yet.)
On the paypal request I sent…… it wanted a “memo” for the payment. (auction, goods, services…..)
If he continues to use paypal will I have to report that as income?(tax wise)
I’m not sure if Paypal or automatic transfer is the better method. I think transfer would be faster since it will go straight to account as opposed to paypal where it goes to paypal then to my bank.
CHOCOLATE RELEASES THE SAME ENDORPHINS IN THE BRAIN AS WHEN YOU ARE IN LOVE.
Angela, I don’t know about reporting income for tax purposes through Paypal but Paypal can be sticky in their rules. If they deem that you are doing something outside of them, they can and will close your acct. And, look into their fees. I use it heavily for ebay and for a verocious shopping habit and there is a good chunck of fees depending on the way the money goes in and comes out and Paypal can have up to 1 week wait times.
When I need to give or receive money I simply email it. It must be an option in the US if it is here, though I just Googled “email money” and only the Canadian banks popped up. Weird.
In that case, I’d stick to a transfer. It’s instant.
Off to work. Like Lisa, working most of the day. Enjoy your holiday weekends, everyone.
Jack:I know you do not want to see your “brother” get hurt, but let them work it out themselves. Your curiosity with her log-ins are a bit scary. Your story sounds a lot like another blog’er Ben who had similar questions. Our advice to him was direct and open communication with his SB should suffice.
Hey all! Happy early Easter!! I will probably be too busy cooking and baking tomorrow to get onto the blog.
I have a quick question…do you think it’s ok for a pot.SD to e-mail some money, to show he is serious, for me to go shopping with? I never even suggested it, he did! And I’m a bit shocked…kind of happy…but still shocked, because I have never had success or been spoiled by a SD before. Is that safe?
Cat: Happy Easter to you too! Shop away!!!! Safe? I think he is trying to show you his interest. Enjoy and have fun!
It is, Jack, and for some strange reason I almost fell asleep reading it. This article will bring yet another wave of SBs (the next bunch better have some wits about them, I’ll tell you what).
Good evening Jack, raine, lisa…how is everyone tonight?
Hi Suzie, the site was down all afternoon
Jack – weather is pretty nice this weekend. Got some gardening and yard work done today, though a bit breezy. But we’re not shoveling snow so I’m happy!
I’m supposed to have my first sd date on Monday, but we will see…he may have to postpone due to a family matter. That’s ok, I’m patient.
hey all! just wanted to quickly say “happy easter”! hope everyone has a great weekend/holiday with their loved ones! xx
ha! suzieQ – I agree completely! Hi Lisa and raine… welcome Jack….
I did my family visiting yesterday so now I’m trying to figure out what to do with the rest of my weekend. I’m not used to having so much downtime…not sure I can handle it!
Happy Easter to you to Villa! I have to work till mid afternoon and then wait for the bus an hour. Family probably won’t be able to come over because we are expecting horrible weather plus i’m broke so no Easter dinner.
AWWW…. sorry Lisa…. if you were here you could come over to our family dinner! my aunt is hosting, about 30 people. will be fun, great food/wine/company
I thought about you today SuzieQ, I went running thru the trails and did NOT fall in the mud this time. It’s all dried up. *whew* hahaha
VC – I forgot we were going to do some trail running sometime…glad you managed to stay relatively clean!
I’m a bit bummed out because I have a few injuries that are keeping me away from training at the moment…another reason I’m bored out of my skull! But I’m sure that with a little rest and lots of ice I’ll be back on the trails soon. Just in time for mud season around here, as the snow starts to thaw on the mountains…fun fun fun!
Oh no! Sorry you are injured… it’s tough out there, with all the rocks, branches, mud under leaves, etc. I almost twisted my ankle a few times. Hope you’re better soon!!! x
Talking about injuries, lol I slipped in my kitchen after I mopped it today. Fell right on my butt. lol
OMG Lisa… .you don’t even have a bubblebutt on which to fall!!!!!!!! LoL!!!
Iam ver well dresss too.
My butt is too big, lol
I not sure I what it take to be his sb. lol Really how does someone conduct business if they can’t spell or talk like that, lol
Wotever!!!!!!! 105 pounds?????
Lisa, do you think if I string together a sentence over there I could get laid on the first date?
Maybe I could get the girls to pay me just to talk perty.
must go, be back later. behave while i’m gone!!!!!!!!!! ahahahaha.
nitemare, if you can string interesting sentences together while making expensive lingerie look exceedingly good… you’ll get laid. no question. x
Villa half of the 105 is my behind, lol
Nitemare why not say: Look to do sex with perty gir. I no job and can meet you now.
Men with no job need laddie with no job for weak end search.
No stings attacked. Marred ho kay.
30 days to pay no interest.
I’m not looking to pay anyone’s rent or give money, i’m looking for the woman of my dreams to settle down with. Note to this poster: try e-hahhaha instead
I’m supposed to be at a party this evening, but the hostess hasn’t contacted me. So, as of the last 15 minutes, I’m in bed in a room all alone, wearing a comfy blanket.
Good evening Victoria
I’m stuck home as usual. No blanket though, too hot here, got the ac on.
How are you dears? I’ve been reading and most of you seem relatively well. Love the perty talk…lol
Ah, the weather here is really schizo, so it’s really hot sometimes, but it like snowed last week… Plus, the blanket’s *all* I have on, and it’s very comfy. But an ac would freeze me.
wow I found one that wants to spoil a girl with “kisses and hugs” instead of money. lol I think I will go kiss and hug my apartment manager when the rent is due.
That reminds me, lisa: it’s time for me to edit my profile(s). I’m not going for that “settle down” jazz!
The site WAS down earlier; I thought my bb was acting up.
AC, Lisa?! No fair It’s 70 degrees in here and I’m about to crank the heat higher.
Home for me too, ladies. I worked all day and ran around to 3 different stores getting ingredients for dinner tomorrow. Im SO happy to be sitting and out of heels.
After all that chocolate talk yesterday, I have a little bag of Cadbury Mini eggs waiting to be opened alongside a bottle of wine.
Hmmm….Lisa I wonder if I could call up Mastercard and offer phone sex in lieu of a full payment? LOL!
Raine, I thought it was my BB too. I pulled the battery off twice and reset it. haha. Eventually I gave up and realized I should be working anyways.
Hi Girlie! Hey I’m all out of chocolate today Care to share a nibble?
SuzieQ, if you find a rep willing to go for that over at Mastercard, let me know. I’ll work Visa in the meantime. Pray we don’t get women reps
wow someone’s hostile on the other site, lol Just read this ugly guy’s profile and says ghetto trash need to reply and that if you expect money from him , you will work hard to earn it and the big one for me “if your idea of fun is scanning the Galleria for shoes, we wouldnt’ have much fun” yikes that hurts, lol
Absolutely, SuzieQ. I bought a little bag but then found my mother had dropped off more chocolate for my girls and some for me too. Ah, Cadbury cream eggs, I love you.
Pffft! Miss me with that mushy stuff! Again, all about the chemistry but uh…*ahem* I’m getting mean again. Sorry.
Maybe lisa can work the lines at Amex and we can all share what we learn over chocolate and wine.
I want some easter candy, please. I can’t get any this year. My whole paycheck this week went for my daughters bday. Now I’m back to saving every penny for may’s rent.
I have to run out to pick up dog food and deposit a cheque…I’ll grab some more eggies for us lisa…what kind do you like?
his profile says “no fat girls (and he will decide if you are fat), no one over 40, no ghetto girls, etc etc
I want the marshmallow ones that come in the egg cartons
Oooh…chocolate would be awesome right now… If this weren’t a dorm, I’d light candles and spend my alone time just relaxing. That with wine and chocolate, would be awesome.
This is Canada lisa…I don’t think we have those yet lol!
Ok, here I go, back in a bit with kibble and eggs….Ewwww, that sounds gross! LOL!
Marshmellow ones in egg cartons? I haven’t seen that!
You can’t light candles in a dorm? Victoria, head out your door and get that wine and chocolate!
Yes they have had them for years. A yellow or white egg carton with chocolate marshmallowy chocolate eggs in them.
I’m not going out, girlie…I don’t feel like putting on clothes! lol
Plus, I don’t think I can legally buy wine…
If my friend ever calls about her party, I’ll pick up some chocolate on my way, I guess. :-/
eeeeeeeeeeekkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk just found that weird guy that contacted me 3 years ago on m.com. He brags nonstop and has a really stupid name, I can’t imagine he parents calling that when he was a baby. Back then I decided not to meet him because it just didnt’ seem right and well he wrote me a very nasty email saying he was just trying to do me a favor as he doesn’t normally date below him. lol He was on SA as a nonpaying member for about a month. O M g he has the same pics, that stupid hair , looks like a tele evangelist. lol
Help me out here BG or Suzieq, i have never heard of these. I keep thinking those marshmellow birds, Peeps, but they don’t have chocolate on them!
I wonder how he keeps his hair from breaking off with all that hairspray, lol
same words in his profile too. This is very interesting, I might find that guy on there that ate a sandwhich in front of me and then ended our date.
these are oval shaped, kinda flat, not round like eggs, and are chocolate covered and when you bite into one, it’s marshmallowy inside. They are usually quite cheap, about a dollar a dozen.
Lol…Lisa, those are some odd guys.
I spotted some chocolate mousse peeps the other day…not a fan of peeps in general, really. As for the ones in the carton, I think they’re sold here also.
This guy is somethine else. Looks like his face is going to explode and his dentures fly out with that big grin on his face. You just notice him, he looks plastic and with that weird hair.
Chocolate, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways…
A-one, a-two, *crunch* a-three….
ok the guy I was emailing back and forth last night just logged on and off without reading my message. Same old stuff?
OR he was just too busy. Sometimes, I glance at my inbox and make the mental note to read and reply later.
I do the same thing because I like to think about what I want to write. However I have had alot of disappearing sds, so I can’t help but wonder. I think i’m going to go get in bed and watch some tv. Have a headache that won’t go away, took advil but it’s still here. I have to get up early for work tomorrow. Will be home after 2 pm.
Have a good night everyone
Night, Lisa! Have a good day at work tomorrow!
Howdy, OC! How are ya?
Maybe I’m letting my naivete show but…what’s a peep?
I don’t think I actually wear a swimsuit even when it’s that season here… I don’t swim often…don’t really even know how. I never eat healthy, lol…I probably should. I’m a vegetarian, if that counts.
Peeps are marshmallow-ey candy chicks…which most people find yummy, but I don’t.
OC I am being good too, yay me! Went out for dog food and chocolate eggs. Came back with only dog food and am eating my favourite “should be decadent but it’s actually healthy” snack.
Thanks for enlightening me Victoria. I have to agree with you…I prefer my chocolate filled with chocolate, not marshmallow.
What snack is that, SQ?
LOL! Any chocolate filled with chocolate is good!
What would I do without this blog?!
Not sure if he’s legit? Ask on the blog.
Need help negotiating? Ask on the blog.
Want to know the best way to enjoy peeps? Ask on the blog!
I’m quite exhausted, dears. I think I’m goint to rest. I may still go to my friend’s party later, but I doubt it. I’ve been up since 4 a.m. and don’t feel up to traveling. Sending out waves of love, dear sugars!
OC, I am kinda envious of that pressure. I tend to pack on 10 lbs in the winters and then scamble to take it off it spring. Every year I do it, and I know that one of these days it won’t be so easy (says the girl eating mini eggs and drinking wine)
Sounds like everyone is off to bed early tonight…Easter Bunny’s on his way!
Think I’ll treat myself to a hot bath.
Read the whole NYT article, and I LOVED it!
Definitely shows an unbiased view of the website…An honest view of SA.
I’m proud of the writer for being able to separate the mainstream view and what we here see.
And nice to see gurlnextdoor in there!
Anybody left in here? Wanted to share some news re: my first email…
go ahead raine…..x lol
Good morning everyone. Got up this morning not feeling well, still got a headache and not happy about having to work on Easter. Got a email from the guy who runs this site about me talking about the other place. I have since deleted my profile from SA. I was on the edge when I woke this morning and didn’t need this.
I have given up my sd search and will withdrawal from this blog. Going to go to work till it’s noon and I can buy a bottle of wine and some sleeping pills and will come home and quietly leave. Best of luck to everyone in their search and happy easter. Sorry but that email was just the last string.
so killing your self is the only option for you?? please reconsider and please go speak to a therapist. good luck
Lisa, I’m sorry if this is my fault for asking about what place you mention and your responding I certainly hope it wasn’t the cause of his email and this post.
Oh my, I feel awful. I suspect you’ll be reading this blog after work. I do apologize.
Is anybody happier
Because YOU passed their way?
Does anyone remember
That you spoke to them today?
The day is almost over,
And its toiling time is through,
Is there anyone to utter
Now a kindly word of YOU?
Can you say tonight in parting
With the day that’s slipping fast …
That you helped a single person
Of the many that you passed?
Is a single heart rejoicing
Over what you did or said?
Does the one whose hopes were fading
Now with courage look ahead?
Did you waste the day or use it?
Was it well or sorely spent?
Did you leave a trail of kindness,
Or a scar of discontent?
As you close your eyes in slumber,
Will Our Creator quietly say …
“You have earned one more tomorrow
By what you have done today”?
~By John Hall
Stephan: Good Morning Sunshine. I know that you know that 90% of the people on the SA site are also marketing themselves on the other sites. It would be silly of them not to. Finding the right SD or SB takes creative marketing and savvy. Not being able to fully blog about our SD or SB experience would like being in a padded cell without windows. We have no one else to turn to except our sugar family. However we or where ever we meet that perfect person should not matter. The blog draws a huge exposure for SA and the long time bloggers make it special. I know you already know that. However I am sad to read Lisa’s post about censorship. We love SA and love you for creating and maintaining the blog. I just want the ability to blog without having to stand in the corner for a time out. We will do our best not to mention other site names, but understand it can happen from time to time. SA is far classier than any other site around. Our mentioning the others just make SA stand out even further. ~OC
OC has expressed everything that I am feeling. We recognize that it is your job to promote SA : ) and you do a great job. It’s the simple things that makes us stay true to this blog. Please have heart….and I wish you many chocolate easter bunnies today!!!
Geez I tell you guys all the time to stick to the blog topic and stop screwing around. Nobody listens! I think we have to remember that taking things OFF LINE is what you should do if you have side comments. If you want to share your email just ask Stephan to sent it to your requested blog’er. I am tired of skimming convo’s about nothing. Ha ha I am sure I am being skimmed by someone right now. No one is going anywhere!
That includes YOU Miss Lisa Penelope!
OC – I agree, it’s really annoying! When I log on and see a good topic with good questions that are useful to me I would really like to read peoples opinions but instead find a few answers hidden between long conversations that are non SA related and really not interesting to me!!
Happy easter, and Lisa.. even though you have removed your profile from SA I really hope you stay on the blog. Your input is useful and you are one of the original bloggers who has been here from the start… this place really wouldn’t be the same without you!!
Hmmmmm….. Koral…I am wishing you some Sugar today…thanks for sharing your thoughts and feelings. Also many chocolate Easter bunnies for you : )
Back to the blog topic….I enjoyed reading the article. I recognized some of my SB and SD friends on there. YOU all represented us well : )
Sweet E…I hear it been raining SDs for you…please share…I love to hear SD stories. And when you have a moment PM me with your address…I have mucho US chocolate for you!!! Loads and loads…lol
OC…(smile) how is your new sugar apartment? cuz I know your sugar life is great!!!
Blog censorship ..
At the end of the day the guy has a business to run. Why would he want patrons on here scouting out participation in other websites? Talk about your other websites on the other website blogs.
Frankly, I’m tired of the constant “off-topic” nature certain people have been to this blog. I read/use this blog as a resource and tool, to learn about the ins and out of sugar dating.. to compare my experiences with my sugar peers. Reading about a neighborhood’s bad postal service or what someone ate for dinner or the bad car choices their best friend makes does not interest me! I’m sorry, but it needs to be said.. because the blog has been consistently misused for people’s personal (off-topic, non-sugar-related) , everyday problems. There are dozens of blogging sites out for the intent of venting your everyday life.
This blog is a resource.. a tool.. there is nothing wrong with keeping focus to it.. or those behind it, trying to enforce the focus and keep people interested and off of “competing” websites.
“Going to go to work till it’s noon and I can buy a bottle of wine and some sleeping pills and will come home and quietly leave.”
Lisa, this is outrageous a horrible claim to leave on a public blog on Easter Sunday. Writing something like this is worthy of professional help. Threatening, suicidal-esque messages all over a blog? Seriously?? Look at the positive things in your life.. you have employment (nearly a fourth of the country cannot say the same right now, due to the economy), you have a roof over your head (and although in a less than perfect neighborhood, you do have a place to live! and better yet, without roommates), you have a pet who relies on you, and most importantly, you have a child who is becoming a woman who looks up to you. You are a strong and capable woman who has been managing. Please stop the dramatics. Not worth it!
Lisa Penelope….I am wishing you back…
Nitemare SD….can you channel her back….
Oh by the way….Mercedes whoo hooo!!! you are in print on the NYTimes article!!!
Franka: Sugar, less ranting and more topic please.
Hello OC, good afternoon sunshine.
I fully agree with you in that mentioning ‘other sites’ doesn’t do any damage to the blog itself, and in looking at the big-picture, at the end of the day, perhaps it adds credibility to the blog in allowing those in the sugar lifestyle to mention ‘other sites’ in relation to SA, tho I can also see how, from a business standpoint, at face value, it may seem counterproductive (just looking at it from both angles). I’m not sure but I’m guessing one of our longest-term sugar fam. members has publicly left the blog with hurt feelings about such a memo asking for her to ‘please not mention other sites’. This blog is a tool, and should be topical, but it is also a ‘third place’ in many ways. If anyone has further suggestions about what should be and should not be allowed on this blog, please email ‘support (at) seekingarrangement.com’ OR ‘stephan (at) seekingarrangement.com’.
Thanks Stephan! I need to email you some fun topics ideas I have been thinking about. The way I see it Lisa can take the memo as a plea for good business sense and put on her big girl panties and join the blog again. Note to all: This blog going forward will be respected, repeat after me…
Now on to the Sugar stories!
Stephan: I read that there may be a chatroom for such conversation that’s completely off topic… Is there any truth to that? It would definitely help us to have a place very similar to the blog but where it’s okay to chitchat the way we do.
Others in general: Many (though, I’m aware, not all) of the conversations that are held stem from the main topic. It’s human nature to speak in such a manner as to create new topics branching off of the original. It’d be a cold and dull forum if all we were expected to do was answer the two or three questions at the end of the blog and go on about our way. There’d be no connections, and surely the love and warmth felt here would be much less, if not completely gone. There’s my opinion.
nyt article very good!
agree offtopic posts here suck. hard to particip8
who is sam from nyt article? anybody know his id?
Fellow: Sam is a long time blog’er. I do not feel sharing his profile number is a sugar friendly gesture. If you have a specific question, he may read it and reply.
Will soon be arranging my first SD date andI have been talking to several SD and am wondering do you ask for an allowance during the getting to know period? or is this unreasonable because you havent met yet?
and also what is the best way to recieve your allowance? like is it better to take cash, hand over your account details, cheques etc.
hope everyone had a fab easter!
Hi Materialgirl: Congrats on your first SD sugar date! Do you feel like you have enough information about him to feel a certain comfort level? If and when you find out if there is chemistry I then progress into the how and when and where the financial or pampering will begin. No chemistry equals not moving forward for me.
I personally think that direct wiring is best. Paypal works, but the fees are a bit much. Once you have that comfort level with your sugar these things will work them selves out with communication. No one wants to be approached too soon regarding the financial aspect, just make sure you are communicating with them to feel good about moving forward.
Much appreciated….i also thought direct wiring was best, it was just awkward figuring out the best time to get it going. i didnt want to get to the actual date, having spent money to look fab for him and to travel to see him, to leave with nothing….all the same i guess its just when you feel the time is right.
hmmm….i have alot to think about i guess! lol.
Sam is a wonderful, kind, fun, witty, considerate,compassionate,honest caring,charming, giving, successful,handsome SD a SB could ever meet. I have been fortunate enough to meet him in person and have experiences that are unforgettable in my lifetime. He is a true gentleman and the best SD!!!! I have the wonderful memories and my smile is permanent FOREVER!!!!
On Paypal to receive payments by credit or atm card from a SD is 4.9% plus a .30 transaction fee. And there is a 5 limit transaction per year on your account. After trust is established, it has been easier for me to receive the amount deposited in my bank account, or a cash in person as a gift : ) Wishing you the best on your Sugar date!!!
materialgirl~ i would think cash or deposit into an account! as Gail said paypal is expensive
This talk about wiring…its expensive too…heck these damn bank charge to send AND receive now.
Wiring also leaves a record which many don’t want /can’t afford to do.
What is the solution when you can’t hand money to someone and you can’t get to their bank to make a cash deposit?
Nightmare, is emailing money in the US an option? I do it all the time between GF’s. All they need is an email address and to be participating in online banking, but you don’t need that info.
NitemareSD: Take the cash and go to her bank and make a deposit! Zero trace on that.
Raine: The blog is trying to stay focused on topic
Stephen~ do you know if Lisa is ok?
does anybody know? if lisa is ok?
can someone check on her?
I would love to hear about your first email. Lets go to our world I just love hearing about Sugar!!! And by the way I have sent an e-mail to Lisa to check on her.
The New York times article interviewed some of our SA SDaddies and SBabies : ) It’s nice to hear their stories : )
Gail~ is she ok? i’m kinda worried about her
On the topic of topics… I think perhaps there could be a happy medium? While the topic listed is always there to be discussed, does it have to be the only one? For instance, we had a new member ask questions about protocal to the blog, always a valid topic I think we would all agree (procedures). But I think there have been ‘off’ topics in the past that could almost be considered in the realm of relationship building. It is easier to open up and discuss things with people we have come to feel comfortable with as a result of some sharing and disclosing. Has it at times gone a bit overboard? Probably. Can we find a happy medium perhaps? A balance of the current topics as well as other bits of information? Just wondering out loud here…
Speaking of being on topic…
I actually do want to know other people’s opinions on the NYT article! haha
We’ve been complaining for awhile about the coverage SA has gotten, and this article actually seems like it did a great job it providing an honest view of what Seeking Arrangement and sugar relationships are about.
Stephan, I think we just need a new blog topic on something else! haha I don’t think anyone is interested But there are some good, maybe controversial comments on the Huffington Post link to the NYT article. If anyone wants to check them out.
I don’t know Beachgirl. I have sent her an e-mail message…just waiting for a response. I hope so : ( I am wondering and worried too…..
nawtibynatur-A happy medium is definately a good thing…I appreciate your wondering out loud …I am listening. Balance will make it easier to share and provide comfort for everyone. I remember when Stephan would come on and send us messages on the blog to keep us on track. Those were the days…he must be busier now : )
I read the full article and have to say, I adored it.
I was in the article (those of you who know me know who I was in the article )
And if you’re curious about the reporter. She was actually extremely intrigued about the lifestyle. I spent an hour with her on the phone. Very pleasant to talk to, and I don’t feel that she shed a negative light on the lifestyle at all. In fact, she gave insight into both sides…because there ARE both sides. I quite enjoyed it. hehehe
goodmorning everyone!! Jules is back
Hi Aanga — hope you are doing well
Still no smoking BG?
Does anyone have a link to the full NYT article?
I read the article and I thought it was nicely done. With a topic such as this and since – as we have all admitted – there are no set rules, the range of individuals and their preference in how they wish to deal with the details of their relationships are going to be wide and varied. No doubt there could have been even more interviews with slightly different methods to the SDs and SBs preferences, but I thought it was an interesting and the most balanced representation of the SB/SD relationship that I have seen yet.
Good day everyone – I must go — the beach and golf courses and my loyal companion await! Adiós!
GOOOOOD Morning family. NC ~ there’s a link on SW
I read the article and very much liked it…perhaps I didn’t give it enough of a shot or, perhaps I was asleep while reading it initially. It was fun and close to home knowing some of those who were quoted on there Aanga
On the subject of sending money – anonomously, remotely and cheaply – since I am not aware of an email process like that,,, is there an answer?
I sent someone a pre-pay phone refill last week. By emailing the codes – from an anonomous email address to an anonomous email address – she got it with exactly the same cost it would have been if she did it herself. All I had to do was go to the register at a place like CVS and pay cash for the refill card (if sales tax in my state is lower, I win that arbitrage)
So if I want to give someone $50 a month I have a way, provided they use a prepay phone.
That’s no more than a gesture. Its not a solution.
I read the article, and I wasn’t thrilled about it, and I wasn’t disappointed by it. Maybe, like Nico, I was half asleep when I read it, but it didn’t really provide much insight. I think she was trying to be unbiased and in the end, it just appears as if there isn’t a thesis. maybe i will reread it.
e-mail transfer is done via the sender’s online banking account, you can send money to an e-mail address. the reciepient will recieve the money via the sent e-mail and then able to deposit in into their own e-mail account, also via online banking. It costs about $1.50 CDN for the sender (might differ for different institutions) and has a minimum and maximum amount (also varies)
Hope that helps.
Its not expensive, but how is it anonomous for the sender in the sense that there is no traceable transaction back to the sender?
What do you do if the sender must not have transaction records on his accounts?
From what I know, it will only show an e-mail address to the reciepient.
Is it safe to come out now? I was going to give my two cents on the article…
Good morning all!
Nico – what is SW? I would like to read the article. Thanks
Ruth Padawer is a very nice woman. I spoke with her back in early January. However because of my dire need to keep my SB life secret I could not provide her with information to print. I however did spend time discussing her ideas for the article. She did her homework and was an avid reader of the blog. She found it addictive! I researched her other work and her background and found her to be very accomplished in her field. Lucky for us she took this assignment. I like the way she did not show the doom and gloom stance that most articles take.
I do wish she could have used more SD/SB subjects in her article. The use of your name kept many of us out of the article. I think that Sam did a wonderful job of providing interesting information for us to better understand his SD/SB arrangements.
Raine, Post! Leaving comments like “Is anyone in here” may be moderated and not show up.
Hello all sugars! just wanted to say hi, and i can’t get the article! my computer is blocking it for some reason!
Has anyone heard from Lisa? still worried about her
^or rather two more cents.
Real name = purpose defeated. Also, the SD prominently featured sounded almost desperate, but that’s just me. Perhaps I too may need to reread the article…
Thanks for clarifying. Am I still not allowed to mention my hometown? Tell you what: send me a copy of the revised comments policy when it’s finished. I’m over the self-censorship!
Does anyone have a link to the actual article?
BG – you’ve got mail
SuzieQ: Just Go to Nytimes.com and search on Ruth Padawer. It comes up. The article is called “Keeping Up With Being Kept”
Yeah, like OC said, you can find it pretty easily – you can also Google the following (NY Times Sugar Ruth) and the article comes right up – any links posted to the blog get moderated and may not post for quite a while.
Susie: when contacting BG, ask her what SW is, and she should be able to provide yuou with either my e-mail or the link
Where do I pick up one of these $100 a pop 20yr old engineering students?
I personally know the SD in question… He is not desperate…. I could say more but I don’t want to… He is a good guy and if there were more SD’s like him then maybe we wouldnt have so much to complain about.
The article was interesting.
..MY SD’s run circles around this poser.
Enough with all the stories, oh, and “the 10 to 1 ratio” isn’t true. SBs don’t get discouraged and don’t settle EVER! A true “arrangement” doesn’t mean that you are paid $100.00 for sex. EVER That is actually a hooker, you can call the shots…all of them!!!!
Someone should really sit him down and give him the talk. As for her, hunny I hope that you have 10 of them! You GO GIRL!!!!
Be mine: you may have a point. I’m sure he is a nice guy, but the article made him look like a victim somehow. Yes, let me reread the article and come back.
raine: I agree with you. All news is slanted though…
IknowtheTruth, hi and welcome. Based on your take on the article, I can’t help but ask: have you SEEN some of these SDs’ profiles recently?! I mean, really…it’s either housewife or hooker, and neither applies to me! Getting discouraged would be second nature if not for my persistence.
INCREASINGLY frustrated over login and slow site response times. Not getting better!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *argh*
$100 a pop, Nitemare? Is that really the quality you want? And what exactly do you mean by “a pop”? lol
raine: I understand for the most part SDs’ profiles can be a little grueling. When you don’t put up an almost naked picture of yourself you practically get marriage proposals, and if you say something that remotely sounds sexual you get an invitation to meet at some “cheap eats” place, or worse…dare I say, Starbucks? The trick is persistence, and not settling. Honestly, I have been very well taken care of, and have not had sexual relations. Perhaps, I am the exception to the rule…anyone disagree or agree with this?
I have been taken shopping and enjoyed many dates with wonderful conversation, I know right straight if they are on the up and up. Last week I sat across from a Pot SD and listened to him talk about everything in his life…bored to tears I tried to stay awake!
My fav SD just moved away, we still email, but I MISS our shopping trips! There is something so sweet about a surprise trip to Tiffanys…
Ironically enough real gentlemen will not put stipulations on an arrangement…and won’t be possessive either. That is how I tell that they are real, and not out for “their” bottom line.
I recently went back and forth with a pot SD who valued his “asking” allowance with me at a fraction of what he had originally posted, my soul isn’t for sale…but maybe there is someone else who he could help out for pennies on the dollar!! I think the key is, knowing what you are worth, and demanding that you be heard. This tit for tat childs’ play isn’t for me!!
raine: you keep plugging along…we will both find what it is that we seek!! I know we will!!!
Truth, I must say I actually don’t mind meeting at Starbucks. I mean, I’ve never met with a SD, but I did recently have a date with a perfect gentleman. We met at Starbucks, which was only a few miles from where I’m staying. It was very open (huge windows) and public, and very comfortable. Granted, I’d prefer somewhere less “national”, but for a first date I love the no-pressure atmosphere of coffee shops. It puts me in a much more comfortable mood than high-end restaurants.
If anyone has ever been interviewed by a reporter you must know that things get taken out of context. Things get said in ways that are not true… I have been interviewed before so I know this is true…
I know that he has done what he says in his above post… He truely cares for her… And would do anything he can to help her… If that was to mean she needed more money he would do it in a heartbeat… It is just the kind of guy he is…
Victoria! You go where ever you feel comfortable for ANY date. It is not the location but your comfort level of where and when you meet.
What’s a kaffeekatsch?
An informal social gathering for coffee and conversation
I just read the whole article, and I actually enjoyed it. It does, to me, show a pretty good view of the site and the sugar lifestyle. I also recognized a few names and that made me smile. Finding out Sam doesn’t like vegetarians is sad though. That B.K. sounds like a really sweet guy. Not desperate, just maybe a “fool” for love. (And I don’t mean that offensively, as so many of us become fools for love.) All in all, I do appreciate the article. It was really the best I’ve read so far since the start of this sugar media craze. It’s pretty funny the way Lola found out about SA, it’s similar to the way I found out. I was looking for financial help a while back and found some other sites. Then, looking for more, I found SA in the beginning of March and haven’t really looked back. This is by far the best site, and I love the blog community!
I just wanted to respond to some of the posts here, especially those concerning the $ amts. I am very disappointed with the article and how things have been portrayed and taken out of context. In addition, there are some flat out inaccuracies in the article as well. I deeply regret being interviewed for this story and for introducing Lola to the reporter/author.
A couple of points I wanted to share:
First – I have offered to take Lola on a number of trips to several great resort locations for business meetings – all expenses paid – and she has not been able to come because she is either too busy with work or school or both.
Second – I have offered a few times to make her allowance not contingent on when we see eachother, but instead be a bank transfer payment from mine to hers. We’re hoping to work this out soon.
Third – I have offered to increase her allowance, and I likely will – but she hasn’t pressed this issue.
Fourth – the $ amounts mentioned don’t include things like gifts and other items. For example I offered to pay for her to take a Stanley Kaplan type GRE practice course that costs approximately $800 – this was outside of allowance and just offered as a gift. She did not accept this offer because she said she does not have time for one of these courses right now. Perhaps I should have offered to put the money into savings for her, and I probably will again – but she didn’t request this.
Lastly – I don’t think that Lola has that many people she can rely on for financial backing of if she gets into a financial or some other jam. I have made clear to her that she can count on me anytime she may need it. We’re more than just SB/SD, we’re good friends.
As one of the quotes says – when these relationships work, they blur the lines between SD/SB and boyfriend/girlfriend. She’s a very special person and deserves a very special SD, but it isn’t as much about the money with us as it may be with others. That being said – as a good SD, I may need to just lead things. Some of the comments here have been a bit hurtful and aren’t helpful. I’d hope you guys would wait before you judge me or her. Please realize we were trying to do a good thing by being interviewed and it has thus far hardly worth it.
NCGent: how ya doing? Long time no chat
as for smoking, I kind of fell off the bandwagon a bit
but I’m gonna try to quit for gooooooooooooooooooooood. Stressful times make me puff a few
BK: Lola was portrayed as a very very sweet girl, no blurred lines there! She would make a wonderful addition to the sugar blog! Lola come join the sugar family.
Wow, is it just me, or is the blog loading very slowly?
B.K., I think you and Lola have a great relationship! If my comments were included with the hurtful ones, I deeply apologize. You seem like a sweet person, as does Lola. Your relationship seems pleasant, and as you said, it’s apparent that there is a real friendship there. I am sorry if, after getting engaged, she leaves, for it’s obvious you do care alot for her. I’m sorry you regret doing the article, but it gave quite a bit of insight to people like myself.
Thanks – I still think the story was cynical and things were included that shouldn’t have been etc. As I’ve said, I believe that 20-30% of it is fiction as it relates to my life. I did speak to Stephan today and he says that it is the best story yet, so maybe I just need to take it with a grain of salt.
My comments above were mainly referring to other comments that were made that I’m a poser or a cheapskate, and that she’s not getting treated well. Of couse we good SDs can always do better : ) but she’s incredibly busy and hasn’t been able to get away for any trips. I offered to take her out dinner and dancing not to long ago, and she just asked if we could stay in. She worked the whole day that day from 6 a.m. and ended up falling asleep in my arms for most of the evening. I’d LOVE to take her to a spa one weekend and even mentioned this for May as April is very busy for her – but she’s got finals she says : (. I still hope we can get away. I just am worried if she were to happen to read some of the comments here she might be upset. It is awful to think of how strained she was financially when she first signed up and what she had to do. What I can pretty much guarantee though – is that even if she does get engaged, she’s always got my support – financial and otherwise.
BK, I know you meant well wrt to being interviewed for this article (but, given everything the msm touches turns to mush, reduces most to regret), and I thank you for clearing things up personally.
Thanks, IknowtheTruth; I shall press on and be like you when I grow up *lol*.
Dear Lola: You are a GOOD sugar, contrary to what BK may feel we said or did not say. No one thinks less of you for being interviewed or what was communicated in the article.
However BK’s story does not add up. Feel free to clarify the 20-30%.
BK, you seem like quite the catch and I commend you. I completely understand struggling with finances, being that I’m practically homeless, going back and forth between my sister’s crowded and tiny apartment and my friend’s dormroom. Add to that everywhere I apply seems to be laying people off more than hiring so finding a job is difficult, and paying for school on my own, I know too well the need for some financial assistance. Good luck to both of you!
Victoria – thanks. Again – I deeply regret being interviewed for this and feel exploited and used. I am not sure yet how Lola feels as she’s crazy busy, but I would not be surprised if she feels the same way. In my mind, I took a huge chance in being interviewed for this, and took an even greater chance in telling Lola about it and then asking her to be a part of the story. She could have reacted very badly. I was led to believe that certain items would be dealt with delicately and sensitively. I don’t really want to go into these. As a general statement I would just recommend to any SBs or SDs who are asked to be interviewed to be very careful. Maybe I was just a fool who was duped – probably the worst feeling of all. Lola and I were tape recorded without our knowledge or consent. If you talk to a reporter, assume that anything and everything you say will be tape recorded, and can be taken out of context, no matter how friendly or how well educated a reporter may seem. Overall, I should have taken my sister’s advice which I got too late which was “Never talk to reporters -they are only out for themselves, and almost always get it wrong.”
I am glad to hear a few of you have gotten positive messages from this – but frankly getting bashed and called a poser after trying to do a good thing – well, I guess no good deed goes unpunnished.
Stephan – if you would consider removing those comments I am referring to I’d appreciate it.
I had hoped that Ms. Padawer and the NYT would have done a better job here – but unfortunately they haven’t. I’m going to take a break from the blog and get back to work today. Sorry not to be more positive – but I do feel a need to be honest and open.
OC – gotta run. Lola is an AWESOME Sugar Baby. I was never saying otherwise. She’s the best! I was just referring to comments above from others and I/we should let them go – that were making our relationship sound cheap and tawdry. As for the 30% – I can email you some of the details if you’d like, but I don’t want to mention them here. They really weren’t to do with her. She’s an amazing person. Please know and respect the fact that she’s incredibly busy right now and probably doesn’t have time to comment on the blog as we all do : ). She’s certainly welcome though. As far as I know though, she’s not a big blogger.
Your openness is appreciated, BK! Take care!
B.k: No email necessary. I do not wish to get involved. This should stay between you and Lola just as the “Sugar Gods” intended it to be.
Bk I understand where you are coming from and am glad that I did not follow through with anything but the telephone interview. I changed my mind about actually letting my interview be written. I like my privacy to much and I will always keep the privacy of who ever I am with.
I am sorry you were treated that way. Reporters can be very harsh and they do twist thing to make it more dramatic. You know who you are and who Lola is, what anyone says does not matter.
Tisk Tisk….Why should my comments be removed from the blog B.K.??????
We are all entitled to our opinions, much like you..should I not be heard, or have the freedom to speak on the situation that I just read about??
This doesn’t seem quite fair, and leads me to believe that you have a bit of a controlling streak about you…
We are all able to be candid on here, this is an open discussion for us all…after reading your reaction to my honest comments on my perception of the article, I’m lead to believe that I have struck a cord. When people aren’t telling the truth they get defensive…
don’t pick on me Sugar Family….I was just being honest.
IknowtheTruth: I highly doubt your comments will be deleted. I found them to be refreshing. Actually I love a bit of humor to break up my day!
My favorite saying (I modified Lady to SD) “The SD doth protest too much”
OCSugarbaby: Thank you, for the compliment! and I agree more than you will ever know with that statement, “The SD doth protest too much!”
My name says it all….
Hope everyone is having a sugar filled day!
Guys – maybe a bit overly sensitive here – fair point. Free speech is free speech. I don’t know what I can say now without losing : ). I had actually posted something earlier today and saw it didn’t make it on here so I thought heavy edits were happening and was a bit frustrated. I’d say if I’m guilty of anything – it is wanting to protect my SBs feelings – and I was concerned about what she’d think seeing your comments.
Iknow – I maybe can’t win you over – but I’d hope you’d realize that these arrangements come in all different shapes and sizes and there’s a lot more to the story. I probably do need to do more for her and believe me I’ve got many ideas : ).
Anyhow – apologies for getting a bit too heavy here earlier. Hopefully Lola can comment. I know she’s still crazy busy though.
One question for the group – I thought the story sort of made it sound that older men (over 40 etc.) aren’t that desirable to SBs. There was the one comment about SDs being, short fat and bald etc. What do SBs think about this?
BK, I may be the exception rather than the rule, but as a sb I don’t judge based on looks. I want a SD to make me feel special. How I am treated, how I am spoken to, if I am respected, all of those are the things that matter. I just wish all SD’s agreed with me. We are a society that wants perfection. I happen to find older SD’s very desirable. Granted I am 41, but I am talking to a pot SD right now who is 59. His age doesn’t bother me a bit.
I agree with nawti. I am 45 and have to giggle when I hear or read comments from younger sb’s that over 40 is too old!
I am talking to a pot sd in his late 50′s as well. What caught my attention was not his looks (he didn’t have a photo up) but rather the respect and honesty that came across in his writing. He also seemed to speak from experience, as in he understood what was expected and immediately worked to help me feel at ease. I found that reassuring.
I suppose that as a more mature woman I also have an assumption that sd’s my own age are looking for younger women, so I probably don’t “qualify” as sb material for them.
I think I once dated that short, fat bald guy you’re talking about, and believe me I was not physically attracted to him at first. But once I got to know him I found his sense of humour, his great respect and admiration for me, and the fact that he adored me and treated me like a queen, transformed him into a very attractive man.
So yes, the ability to make me feel special is something that definitely endears me to a man, sd or otherwise.
Nawti, I am with you. I’ve had some partners that would make my girlfriends fall over and die of laughter but they were amazing, supportive and made my eyes sparkle and tear up from laughter. That’s all that counts, both in sugarland and in normal (you know what I mean!) life. I’ll take the nerd in the room, hands down, anytime
BK….it’s obvious you care for Lola. I can imagine your frustration around feeling you were portrayed in such a way that wasn’t what you intended, however, you and Lola know what goes on in your relationship. That’s all that matters. Who is to say what the perfect arrangement is, really?
“One question for the group – I thought the story sort of made it sound that older men (over 40 etc.) aren’t that desirable to SBs. There was the one comment about SDs being, short fat and bald etc. What do SBs think about this?”
I am only 19, and I’ve always been a believer in the “age is only a number” thing. I can’t say physical attraction doesn’t play a part with me, it does quite a bit actually, but age doesn’t determine attractiveness for me. I mean, I believe that initial attraction is always physical, then personality comes in (which usually is what helps strengthen the attraction).
Please share are your thoughts or opinions about the current SA topic. The New York Times article, did you get a chance to read it?
Good evening all.
I read the article and I felt that while not overly negative it did display a little condescending attitude toward it’s subjects, an arrogance that permeates most of NYTimes biases. It was also a titillating article promoted to get the public’s eye and drive up sales at the newsstand and hits to their website. But that’s just me.
Gail: Oh…I see.
I think the article was typical and it is expected that the truth would be a bit distorted. When is the last time anything in the media was 100% true? From a business point of view, any publicity is good publicity! Both for the site and the NYT. It got a lot of attention and I’m sure there will be plenty more people to choose from as curiosity brings in great new members, along with a few crazies\fakes, as always…lol.
Good Morning All,
I keep saying I’m not going to do any more blogging : ).
OPOV – Great comments. I don’t think I could have said it better myself. I am actually a pretty big (or was, lol) NYT fan – and fan of the Magazine. I’ve seen some insightful and clever stuff written in it such as, “The Art of the Facebook Update.”
I may be beating a dead horse here – but the point I was trying to make was that because Ms. Padawer is a professor at Columbia and is fairly experienced in “sensitive” topics, and since she flat out said in writing to me she’s “never been accused of violating anyone’s trust,” among other things – for this type of story – I thought this would be different. (Sorry, long sentence). I don’t think she held up her end of the bargain. I do feel like the story was condescending – as though our lives are completely separate from everyone else. It was almost as if we were some type of sociological study vs. people that could be sisters, fathers or neighbors.
One of the main points I wish would have been made is that I think this sort of thing is much more common than American society likes to think it is. My hope was/is, that if we are more honest about this type of thing we’ll all be better off.
I should add, it is good to hear that some of you have taken away good things from what Lola and I have shared. This gives me comfort that it wasn’t all for naught after all. Thanks.
Good morning everyone – well, I see that the opinions on the article are along a range of being sweet and sour! OK, all those who didn’t know that the NYT is in business to make money, please raise your hand… and if you didn’t know that they pay writers like Ruth to write because they have the ability to “tell a good story” which in-turn sells papers – you can raise your hand too… BK, the world has no idea who you are – no one beyond the 25 or 30 people here know anything about you so no harm done. Hopefully lessons were learned. I still believe overall the article was well done and the most balanced I have seen. Whether or not each person interviewed was happy with how the details of their situation was portrayed is another matter and is why I don’t think I would agree to do something like that. I almost did but received some wise counsel to do otherwise. I don’t think the article does any damage to the concept but presents it as a complex issue that must be handled individually to meet each person’s individual needs.
Good Morning Sugar Family.
I’ve actually taken the time to read through the comments. B.K. ~ I’ll agree at this point it’s a dead horse; however, your comments about being taken out of context were well heard. It is hard to imagine allowing yourself so to be so vulnerable by opening to a reporter ~ obviously with the best of intentions.
Any SD/SB would understand there are varying degrees of assistance provided and the details of the ‘assistance’ is something kept private between the two of you, simply because what works for you may not work for somebody else ~ it’s like an opinion. You helped in ways you felt would provide Lola with a sense of relief. If nothing else, perhaps reading that article and realizing you could have helped more may just give you the motivation to do it instead of waiting for her to ask (?)
Either way, I commend all that put themselves out there and agree with Stephen, while it may not be the BEST it could’ve been, it is certainly by far the best and most fair representation to date.
Morning Nico! I haven’t been able to tell you but congrats on the good fortune you have experienced of late – well deserved, I do believe!
Good morning all! Heading to Houston for today and tomorrow, and then it is Boston on Thursday and Friday!
I think I have a breakthrough with my pot sb lol Got a text yesterday that said “OMG that was hilarious what I said about green electricity” So I am assuming she is reading the WSJ! one day down 30 more to go lol
Have a great week!
NC, sounds like the great experiment is working – good for you! Safe travels.
If anything it is bringing traffic to the site, as evidenced by the slow server access times on here. Just now I saw a new profile who specifically mentioned that the reason she is here is because she saw the NYTimes profile and decided to give it a shot. Of course, she is non paying, so does not add much economic benefit to the site owners. But still…
Thank you SE ~ He has since cut off ties to gals he had previously chatted with to show his commitment to creating an ‘us’. Feels good and I feel blessed. Now I know how you and OC feel
NC ~ congrats on the breakthrough. Perhaps all she did need was some mentoring. YEAH!!
Nico, yes it is wonderful, isn’t it? I will be traveling west in a few days for a long-overdue visit! It has been TOO long but circumstances are what they are and it couldn’t be helped – we are probably better because of it – can’t wait though.
I am heading out now – I need to get back to being a beach-n-vacation bum! Adios!
SE ~ My SD refers to the time apart as Exquisite Anticipation
Funny How the others in the article are not complaining about the writing style or facts.
Cat: Please use your sugar voice. I love your comments but when they are hurtful, it becomes wrong.
Hmmmm. Pretty quiet today…. How is everyone? Nico I’m glad to hear everything is going along quite nicely for you!!!
For me I had a short visit from my new SD… Just popped into my office to say hello… It was a nice surprise…. We are meeting for lunch later this week… Crossing fingers this will go further!
OC: I know I was not the most positive in saying what was on my mind, but I just got fed up. You know what I mean. But since it all gets censored or moderated anyway, it doesn’t matter…
Cat: No I don’t know what you mean. I will never take out my frustration on another Sugar. Yes, at times it is difficult to type that comment and NOT hit the Submit Comment button. But try to understand that it is not helpful, but hurtful. I know you will be the sugar I have grown to know and love. Right?
To all others: Stop being afraid of using the blog for what it was set up to be. A tool for others to learn and share about Sugar dating. I am personally tired of the term censored or moderated. If you are hurtful to other sugars you should be moderated.
Will it have silly comments regarding other things. Sure, but in the end it is here to help not hurt.
Hi everybody, how’s it going..Im supposed to meet a sd today who is here on business, but thinkin; about cancelling
Good afternoon Sugar Family,
It seems like its been awhile. I have been ever so busy on two other blogs… actually they are employment blogs…I am trying to help others with questions regarding unemployment benefits.
We are so lucky to be employed today. Can you imagine over 1 million people are unemployed in just California alone? With the NYT article alot of people are finding creative ways to make their ends meet. A question was asked on the blog…”How are you making your ends meet? I just can’t tell the ladies to find sugar daddies…or can I? LOL
BMine, Nico,Suthurn,NcGentleman,OcSugar, BK, Jules….Enjoy the Sugar Makes life blissful doesn’t it? Aaaah!!! How sweet it is!!!
And Nico….Happy, Happy, Happy Dance for you!!!
I will try not to be such a stranger….: )
Ahhh thank you Gail. Just a little extra happy dancing. I was out window shopping the other day while waiting to meet my friends for dinner. I arrived early and went into a store called Sephora (or something like that) perfumes and make up galore. Anyhow, found a lovely scent by Prada and was on the phone with my SD just talking. We spoke today and he ordered the perfume for me AND because it’s not an everyday type perfume, he ordered the lotion too to keep in my purse *blessed*
As to your question about how to makes ends meet, I capitalize on all available opportunities. I will solicit all marketable skills. I do some contract work doing data entry (for somebody that cannot to hire an employee and justify the expense). I also do contract paralegal or admin type work from home.
It sounds like I have two spoiled SB sisters…lol…OC and Nico!!!
I am looking forward to my next experience. My SD friend that I had just poofed away….I suppose it had to do with the lady that called my phone 3 times to ask me who I was. I am no love triange SB…
One day…it will be my turn again In the meantime…work and lotsa fun!!!
well, i got another email from a pot last night; a local one at that. He sounds pretty interesting and wants to meet up for drinks to see if we click or not. But for some reason, I don’t forsee him replying to my reply. If he don’t, that will make like 5 pots in the last 2 weeks to initiate contact with me and then not even reply to my replied email lol good thing i’m not even looking anymore or i may start feeling frustrated! It sure would be cool though if I actually got an email from a pot and them something came out of it.
oh ya, my guy and i (non-SD) talked last night about moving to Missouri! I never could stand Tennessee for very long anyways so I’m definitely game for moving out of this boring state!
for the love of Jesus, wtf are guys doing on here if they aren’t going to b financially available to someone unless they are married?? LOL OMG!! i swear.
Uber: Let me quess, since you were not all that clear. You are frustrated that a pot SD does not believe in allowance? LOL
dang, did the blog die or something? I’m seeing the last post as like 5 hours ago!
Nitemare, I noticed you talking about transfering money; have you thought about getting her a pre-paid card…like Visa or MasterCard? I’m not sure how much it would cost to add money to someone’s card, but that could be an option for you.
Hey everyone, been gone for awhile, but now I’m back. How’s everyone doing?
I so agree with victotia about age. I’m 20 and have been lucky enough to meet quite a few guys from this site, which is deffinitely the best one I have seen. They were mostly in their 40s and were most definitely not ‘short, fat balding’. Personally I much prefer the older guys and am much less likely to consider meeting significantly younger guys. Age might be just a number as Victoria says but it also gives some hint as to the fact that these older guys have seen more of the world are likely to be more mature and more interesting and considerate of a young SB and, lets face it girls, be more wealthy and able to help us out a bit. I’ve had several SDs from this site and they were almost all in their 40s so I speak from experience.
Oh and Joules you are right, pre paid debit cards are fantastic. I currently have three of them from SDs and they can just top them up using online banking so can transfer $ to me whenever and wherever thay are. Its such a cool system, once it has meant I could have the finances transfered to me while on the way to the airport for a trip arrantged at the very last minute so I could buy the air ticket when I arrived there. and it means that SDs can transfer $ to me so we dont have the handing over cash scenario when we meet. deffinitely a very excellent system, ideal for SD/SB arrangements.
oh I forgot. who cares what most people think about the NYT article, what matters is that it is good publicity and it is absolutely bound to attract plenty of generous wealthy older guys to the sugarbowl, and girls there just cannt ever be to many guys in here with us!
Good morning sugars & daddies!!!! ♥ Been a long time!!!!! But i’m back ……How has everyone been?!?
Good morning everyone – GND, how have you been? Young&Fab, same for you – how you been?
Zabrena, great point regarding the article – beyond the few folks that were interviewed and mentioned in the article, the article will be a positive thing for SA. Even if the 10:1 ratio of SBs to SDs is not completely accurate, it should entice more SDs to come to the site. It’s good for everyone!
Anyone else up and at’em this morning??
Good Morning All,
Not sure if I agree with you and Zabreena that the article will bring in more SDs than SBs. I think the story was mixed on both. I think the slant on many of the SDs was kind of negative as I said in previous posts. Hard to know for sure. It would be interesting if Stephan could comment based on what he’s seen in membership growth on the site. I think it surely will bring a lot of curiousity – but I also wonder who really has read it. Outside of the SA Family here, or some folks I told about it, I don’t know anyone who has read it or mentioned it. Have a good day all.
Ok, just for snorts and giggles I dug this beauty out of the email files from last fall. I thought I would make you chuckle on this fella’s request. I think my polite response was: Are you kidding me? Please seek immediate therapy!
“Im attached so discretion is a must. Its a weird situation where she cheated on me and through circumstances we are still together. I want to one-up her without her finding out with a cool girl who is hotter than her and shes a good sort so lucky you are a stunner!
So if you’re interested in helping me solve my problems let me know a little about yourself and why you are on here and we can discuss further details such as suitable re-imbursement and get to know each other a bit better.”
^oh wow. ‘One up her’. That’s a gem.
Ugh, I just read that article and….no comment. I really like how people always assume that a sugar relationship is the equivalent of prostitution. Cause yeah I’m really gonna open my legs up to anyone with a big enough wallet. Gotta go for the gold you know! (hope you can sense my great sarcasm in this, argh!)
In other news, I may have a date this weekend with a potential SD. We’ve been talking over the past month now, but have yet to meet due to him going through alot with a death in his family. But he wants to meet soon, and I’m hoping soon is this weekend since the place we’d be going to would be near a mall with all my favourite stores inside. Including an alltel store so I could get my phone bill paid . So hopefully that happens.
Allo beloved sugar family!
Hi, GND! Missed ya here! I get your sarcasm…hate the prostitution equation. It’s annoying as well as demeaning. We aren’t out charging by the hour. I mean, I’m a very open person and there are some people I know personally that are actual prostitutes and I respect them very much, but even they wouldn’t put sugar dating in the same light as what they do. That’s a terrible run-on sentence, sorry… Anywho, the relationships found through sugar dating usually (from what I’ve heard here on the blog) lead to some sort of connection. Prostitutes don’t offer that, not really.
News: I got an email from a pot SD today. I’d emailed him around the time I first joined SA. He seems like a GREAT catch. Says he was away on business and that’s why he took so long to reply. So, hopefully it won’t be another month between messages! Anyway, if things work out, I’m gonna be a happy baby.
Also, I got an email from Stephan the other day (for anyone arguing about side conversations and whatnot); he said (basically) that until the chatrooms (which he confirmed) are here, to continue blogging as we have been. So, have fun!
Good luck meeting your potSD, GND!
Hey Vic, yeah I was away for a bit. Just taking a quick break from sugar dating to clear my head. Happy to hear the good news on the email, hopefully it’ll turn into an arrangement. So the chat rooms are confirmed! *does happy dance* That’s great to hear!
Thanks Vic and good luck to you too.
GND – I like your comment about the story. It is good again to hear from a SB perspective that money isn’t of course the only motivating factor. Of course, I know it is a factor – but I always thought that SBs in some cases (not all) view this situation as a wealthy boyfriend of sorts. In other words – you date a guy because he’s got great qualities, but in addition to that if he’s wealthy and generous and wants to help, it doesn’t hurt. While SDs have eyes wide open, I think most of us hope that we’re more than just somebody pleasant with a big wallet to a SB. On the flip side – I think the SBs hope that the SDs look at them not just as sex objects, but as people, with brains, ambition and beauty. One of the few things I liked about the story is what it said about what I liked about Lola – her looks were listed last. Have a great day all.
BK, that is exactly how I view the SD/ SB relationship, and approach it myself. I always look for one who I’d be happy to call a BF if he was single and in all of my previous situations, had a personal situation changed, I would have certainly explored that option with a giant smile. Boyfriend or SD….if I don’t get sparkley eyes from him, he’s not for me!
Victoria…..best of luck on this one! Maybe your wait is over. Sending you lots of luck.
Ha, “sparkley eyes”…I get them so easily. I think if I don’t feel some sort of butterflies, it’s not gonna work. I get “crushes” in a heartbeat, so if a guy doesn’t cause butterflies, then chances are slim that he will in time.
Due to the number of people on this site. The woman who call themselves Sb who actually do prostitute themselves and give the real SB’s a bad name. And also on the other side with the SD’s who want to pay for what they want in bed. It makes it hard on the real Sb’s and SD’s here. We end up weeding through many, get discouraged and want to give up. But them you get that one email, that one person you think…Is he really real? Could I have finally found what I am looking for. It makes it all worth it in the end. Keep up your searches, the one for us all is out there
Thanks, sweetredhead! You’re right on the mark!
Yes I agree with Sweetred, there are alot of fakes out there but as a true SD or SB it’s our job to weed out all the bad from the good. Good luck to you too Sweetred
I’m a newbie and have never done this before… I’ve read some of the blog, it’s been very insightful! Could you please take a look at my profile and let me know if I need to change anything?
Also, I have a few pot SDs, but am not sure how I should go about with getting them to meet up etc. One was really sweet and we have exchanged face pics. However, in his last email, he said he would not rush me and would leaves things up to me. He is looking for a longer term type of situation and says he has done something like this before. Is it ok to ask him questions about his previous arrangement?
Thanks so much!
Firstly, welcome to the blog, MissNN!
MissNN, I personally always ask about previous arrangements. Of course, I make sure to be sensitive. Like, I always ask if it’s okay that I inquire about his previous arrangement(s). It helps to learn what he’s actually looking for and what kind of person he is in a sugar relationship.
As far as your profile, it looks pretty good to me. You sound fun and express what you want in a pretty clear way. You seem honest and open, too. Of course, there’s always room for improvement, but it seems great to me! I’m looking forward to see what the SA vets have to say, though!
Welcome to the blog MissNN, I agree with Vic on this one. Your profile is really good for a newbie. If your potSD has had previous experience with a SB then that’s good. If he’s open to discussing it (which most SDs I’ve found usually are) then ask him about it. Ask him how many times they met up, did they travel together, what were the expectations, and most importantly why did it end. That’s the biggie because it can indicate alot about him and what he’s looking for.
Hi all! Sorry I have been totally MIA for about a month! Super busy with work and a few pots
Wow! Overwhelming to catch up on the blog…
If you take the $ugar out of Sugar Dating, do you still get “sparkly eyes?” I know that sugar relationships come in so many shapes and sizes. But really if you take the sugar out of either side, it would just be dating. The sugar is why both parties come to the site but the relationship takes shape via chemistry and communication. I came here to find dating excitement. Travel, spoiling, and zero drama was important to me. I knew I could do all three and wanted to find the same. Not all SB’s are all about the $, but I for one think the $ugar is what makes it exciting for both parties. Sugar is defined in my mind with mentoring, sex, shopping, traveling, building a special relationship via chemistry plus many many more things.
Victoria & GND- Thanks so much for the feedback! I’m dying to see what the others SBs/SDs say!
This pot SD has clearly outlined in his profile that his last experience lasted 4 yrs and he took care of all the living expenses, etc. However, since he is married, which is good in my mind, I wonder how he managed to spend 3 nights a week with the last SB? I like a little bit of space since my job can be demanding. I guess I’m the type that wants to know all the nitty-gritty, so that if there is chemistry and we click, then it will be something good for the two of us!
Hi. I’m actually here to say “bye” since I’ll be leaving the Sugar Family. Not that I’ve been here very much lately anyhow, but it’s time for me to move on.
For the record I liked the article. It showed a variety of different approaches and experiences which is, I believe, an accurate overall depiction of the state of arrangements (even if specifics were off). It illustrated the range between transactional and traditional relationship that can occur.
Between reporters and editors it is typical that articles are distorted and stories changed a bit. I can’t speak for others like B.K., but by and large I found the result acceptable.
It’s interesting that a few potential SB that I did not select recognized me from the article and contacted me.
I hope all of you find what you seek, or if not, have a wonderful journey and experience in your seeking. Best wishes to you all.
Good Evening all…
I was curious to the effect that this article may or may not have had on the membership and began looking thru the newest profiles since the weekend. It appears that there have been quite a few new members (mind you, I am only talking about sugarbabies here). One thing that really caught my eye was in the description files, in the area of support that they are seeking: it seems to me that there is a larger than usual number of women only seeking 1-3k a month is support, whereas from browsing before, 3-5k was the most popular (I am sure if this site’s database is set up properly the admins could verify or refute both statements) and I was curious if that figure was adjusted downward based on the numbers being thrown about in the article. Afterall, there weren’t too many stories about 10k/month allowances to offset the heavy emphasis of Lola’s relationship results. I am curious if the article contributed to the downward expectations of the newer members.
On a personal front, I met someone last week who I thought we clicked a bit but wasn’t sure. Well she contacted me this weekend and wants to meet again and see what’s possible. So here’s hoping.
OC….that’s a tough question. I look for much of the same things as you do in a SD relationship. There’s one other key thing that I look for that I don’t want to post right now and that often wins over the sugar (but is often found in men on a site like this). Because I know I can have both, things stay double exciting. And when I date normally, I tend to date the same types as you find here so the line is blurred. It’s just more up front here.
OPOV, I am not sure how I missed that you were male I thought you were a SB. Good luck with your date from last week.
I’ve often wondered what other ladies put in that area, more just out of curiousity. I was certain that I would find that the number went up when such an article came out, mostly from ladies who, although read the emphasis on the Lola/ BK relationship, might get excited about types like Sam being here also…..kind of ‘shooting for the stars’ if you know what I mean.
LOL…..MIA SD and SBs are on tonite!!!!
AJ…How is it working for you…lol…being dark and mysterious?
OC…sparkly eyes…lol…all the time!!!
Sam…not again…I am weeping…its raining salty wet tears over here!!!
Thank you for the wonderful experiences and opportunity to cross your path…hey…where are you going…I am a good at follow the leader : )
Woohoo Victoria….get the Sugar rolling!!!! Yaaah!!!!
It was a pleasure to have you as part of my sugar family. I will have fond memories and please know that you brought me hours of laughter from your posts. Your insight and SD wisdom is priceless! I am sad to say farewell, but I do understand. Whenever I see a dancing chicken I will smile and think of you. Sincerely, your sugar sister ~OC
Bye Sam, it was nice having you as part of the sugar fam.
Now in other news I have great news everyone! I have confirmed a date for this weekend with a potSD. We’re gonna have lunch and then do some shopping. Then if shopping lasts too long, some dinner after shopping. *does her happy dance*
Gurl: That is wonderful news! I am so happy for you.
I was reading an article about Puff Daddy or P.diddy today and thought about a new word to describe the sugars that dissapear. We can call the pot’s that dissapear “POOF Daddy’s!” lol
Haha good one OCSugar, is anyone else up?
Hi! I recently signed up for SA after reading the article in the NYTimes magazine.
I’m a very new SB and I’m about to meet a potential SD for coffee later this week. I consider myself a pretty street smart person and commonsensical, but I just wanted to ask those experienced SB’s out there: what are some common red flags? I want to know what to look out for, either online or in person. Obviously, I just want to be safe.
April 15th, 2009 at 10:13 pm
“OPOV, I am not sure how I missed that you were male I thought you were a SB. ”
I am not sure how to take that. Hmm… :/
Welcome Tea, for me a big red flag when I meet a guy for the first time is if he comes off too strong. I mean granted there are guys out there with strong personality types, but I mean guys who want to meet for drinks and then get a hotel room asap. That is a big red flag. Any guy who tries to pressure you into doing something your not comfortable with right away, is also a big red flag. Online, a guy who constantly asks for pics and doesn’t seem genuinely interested in getting to know you is a red flag. We call those the picture collectors, here for the pictures they ask for (which are usually risque) and gone as soon as any talk of an allowance pops up. That’s all I can think of for now.
I just signed up a couple of days ago.
I found the site through the NYT article, which I found a link to on another website or blog (don’t remember which it was).
I started reading the blog Tuesday, and I’ve learned alot.
One question from SBs that has come up several times in the blog and which I never saw an answer from a SD is:
Why do SDs save an Sb as a Favorite and then never send them a message?
I think the answer is pretty simple. The reason is that saving a SB as a Favorite is the only way to save someone’s profile that I know of. So I look through the returns from a search and save as a Favorite the SBs that I’m interested in. Then I go back and look at their profiles more carefully to decide if I want to message them.
GND-Congrats, hon! And good luck!
Sam-I’m sad to see you go. Like OC said, I’ll think of you when I see a dancing chicken…or when the sky starts falling (which it surely will soon).
OC- I definitely still get sparkly eyes when there’s no sugar…I remember, I went gaga cause a guy was eloquent and wrote beautifully. I’d never actually spent real time with him, just fell in love with his writing and we chatted alot. So, yes, sparkly eyes are there (for me) with or without $ugar. But, they’re so much shinier with it!
Welcome to the blog MtDon.
Yes Vic I have to agree with you on the sparkly eyes comment. I am a sucker for philosophers and writers. Any guy who looks decent and can speak to me poetically can grab my heart pretty quickly. $ugar really has nothing to do with it. It’s more about having the right chemistry. And if I couldn’t see myself looking at this guy if he were not so well off, then I’m moving on. But since I have a boyfriend, the $ugar in this situation is a must.
welcome to the sugarbowl Tea and MisNN.
Tea you asked about red flags. I guess the best advice is that you dont forget how you would behave normally. Just because you met a guy on a SD/SB web sit dont forgett common sense, if it would worry or concern you in a guy you met normally in the real world it ought to worry you in a guy you met on line. They are the same guys!
MisNN you asked how you should go about getting them to meet up. In my experience, I am afraid, if they are not pushing you to meet they are usually not serious. On the other hand he may just be a nice guy not wanting to put on any pressure. I absolutely agree with you, married SD are definitely the best in my view but again the idea that he can see you 3 days a week semms a bit unlikely to me.
As to how to get a meeting going I tell them that I expect the SD to make the running but then once they have maed it clear what they are looking for from you and what you can expect from them I determine the pace. I arrange to meet for coffee in a busy cafe where I know I can leave out back if I need to make an escape. NEVER let them know where you live, not so early anyway. I have a slim busty figure but I cover it up mostly for this meet. usually tight black trousers and figure hugging black turtle neck and, of course, always, heels. They see no flesh but but get a great idea of my figure. That meet should be 30-60 minutes. then I make them wait. unless, and it has happened twice he wants to take you shopping there and then. even if you go shopping then you leave. you make him wait several days b4 meeting for dinner and then I wear a very sexy dress, short, tight and low cut. but dinner is all it is, no matter how keen he is. ALWAYS remember that this is SUGAR dating and we spell sugar differently, he spells it s(ex)ugar and we spell it $ugar. whatever he may say now, ultimately 99.99% of SDs want to get your panties off. Now personally I@ have absolutely no problem with this, I absolutely love sex and wouldnt want a relationship with a guy that didnt involve it but this is sugar dating and I have a very sweet tooth, so I make sure that I have my $ugar sorted out before a second dinner date, after which, well if I meet a second time he has deffinitely earned what he wants….
Zabreena good advice. I agree with you, no matter how much a SD talks about wanting to get to know you, ultimately the kind of sugar he’s looking for involves S.E.X., whilst for SBs it involves money. That’s the short of it. And in any case, most SBs want to make sure they have a solid financial relationship set up before they start giving up the goods so to say.
Thanks for the advice Zabreena. In a way, some of this is like common sense online dating on with the $ugar and s(ex)ugar. The 3x a week and being married did sort of raise a lil bit of red flag for me, but we will see what happens. I did write him a nice email asking if we could do a quick meet. Fingers crossed! I understand what your getting at… beyond having chemistry, good sex begins in the mind. You need to be mindfcuked first.
hey missNNdont just write ‘asking’ if you can do a quick meet. you call the shots here you tell him the way you are prepared to play it. if he wont agree to a short meet on your terms and agree instantly no quibble, dump him and block him, simple. no serious SD would have the slightest problwm with a brief first meet, if he has he aint the sort of guy u want to meet at all. remember there may be more girls than guys on here but you are the babe, make him work for you. after all you are doing him a fqavour too, the harder he has to work for you the more he will want you and the more he will appreciate you when he eventually gets those panties of yours off. grin.
OPOV…..I meant no harm. I don’t read the blog enough to know and I generally don’t read personal conversations between people so the couple of times I’ve been on and seen your name pop up , I just guessed. Seems silly, I know…..lol. Forgive me,
Victoria/ gurl….I am a sucker for writing style too. I’ve made a very important connection on this website, one that started from exceptional writing. Not a SD for me but as important, hands down.
Tea, trust your instincts. They are as valuable as any advice given.
Good morning everyone!
SAM, it was a pleasure getting to know you via the blog – your insight has been valuable and you made a very positive impact on the blog. All the best – selfishly, we’d love to get a update from you from time-to-time to know how everything is going.
Welcome MtDon, Tea and MissNN – MissNN, I agree in principle that the SB needs to make sure she stays in control, however, I could caution you that giving the appearance of pushing too hard for a meet may cause some SDs to become “POOF Daddies” – to use the OC-coined term. There are ways to call the shots and not appear to be calling the shots. The key is to remain in control and not be pressured into doing meeting before you’re ready, and if you meet, not to do anything else before you’re ready. Some SDs might prefer to get to know you a little better via text/email/phone – not endless conversations, but some SDs see that as the next step beyond communicating back and forth via the SA website. Be careful that you don’t push the “harder he has to work for you” idea — remember, there are far more fish in the sea than fisherman and some good potential SDs might just move on. I don’t want to downplay what Zabreena is saying, but just ask you to view it from a SDs perspective. Not all SDs respond the same way to the same requests.
I also understand what some are saying about how with SDs, sugar dating is ultimately about sex. I don’t agree with that – perhaps I am the 0.01%, but certainly sexual compatibility is important, if there is not chemistry, it will never get there as far as I am concerned. With some SDs, it’s not all about sex – it’s all about what is missing in their life or situation and while it may include sexual intimacy, it also may include other things that equally or more important than that intimacy.
So, I’ve finally finished reading the NYT article.
Obviously, you have to take it with a grain of salt. The goal of reporting is to sort of provide a perspective on things… not necessarily the one of the people who are interviewed. It’s all taken out of context. The worst part is that that a lot of readers will take the article for face value if they are not discerning enough. It’s sort of like hearing one side of the story from two people in a fight. You don’t hear the other person’s side until they do. Somewhere in between the two stories is the truth.
Also, the article focused on spefically on BK and Lola’s type of SD/SB relationship, which is only one of many types that may go on. Though, ideally, this is the mutual type of relationship I am looking for as well. Someone who is willing to mentor, be there, and so on but with great chemistry.
Then again, we can also say that if we were the founders of the website, any media is better than no media at all!
OPOV- you bring up some interesting points. I think that with times being very tough for some, it’s better to be able to have someone to just give the basics without getting to greedy. Some women, are just grateful that they can and will be able to survive. In away, I think this is actually good for SDs, since they will have more choice and potentially meet someone who is more fitting for them, given that they too are really looking for a mutually beneficial relationship and not a pro.
Zabreena x- I actually wrote asking to talk in person really, so hopefully he’s open to it and we’ll do something public. Ultimately, the goal is see if there’s something there and move to the next step.
Morning SE- I completely understand what you are saying. By no means am I pushing him to meet. I’m naturally inquisitive and ask lots of questions. I tend to put things in the open. It may just be a difference in communication styles- especially since being the SD, he does not really write very much. Also, like you, I know that it may not be about the sex. Sex is highly important of course. We’re all looking for something that is lacking the relationships we’ve had- whether is that thrill of excitement of knowing someone is on your mind or its knowing that someone just cares enough about you.
Well its good to know things are back to normal – all we are trading is sex for money.
Now on to business.
Good Morning East Coast and West Coast babies!!!
Such early risers…I am amazed to see all of you all awake…bright eyed and busy tailed. Anyone for a cup of tea?
Last nite was tax time…I always file late…Luckily this year no refund…but no payment either
Any newbies on here as a result of the NYT article? If so WELCOME SUGARS!!! OK…now its off to work I go…Have a great day everyone!!!
And happy to hear the $100 a pop chicks are coming in from the article.
Kinda like the H1-B Visa argument depressing wages in the tech industry.
Should be good times ahead.
Here’s a cup of tea..with tons of sugar : ) Did Lisa channel you up this morning to provide us with your points of view? Welcome, you know how I love your wicked sense of humor! or dark side?
Have a wonder day Nitemare!!!
Morning Gail and Nitemare! Yes, I suppose the NYT article had the opposite affect on Craig’s List! LOL
Nitemare ~ I bought a merchant machine for such an instance
Morning Suthern…lol…are you fella’s the lucky ones
Ok…I am really leaving now….no more lurking….sincerely… welcome new CLs babies : )
LOL @ Nico…oh..no you didn’t….lol….Morning Nico…had to say hello before I left…thanks for being part of our conversation on the NYT article.
See how hard I am trying to stay on topic….(smile) later ALL…REALLY this time!!!
Times like this it is critical to manage your expenses carefully.
Suggestions for SB survival –
Burn less candles.
Keep phone conversations short and to the point to conserve minutes.
Wear the same dress twice.
Wear lower heels and walk to date.
Pack light – save on airline baggage fees
More emphasis on meal dates
Offer waxing as an option to the SD for an additional $30.
HUGS Gail and yes, I did
Nice Nitemare….take full advantage of all possibilities.
G’mornin’ SE and to all the newbies
Morning Nico – wow – seldom am I referred to by any name in the same sentence with any form of the word “new”. Thanks!!
Morning everyone, didn’t sleep last night so running on orange soda and a small bit of adrenaline that was locked in my body somewhere.
SE I agree that for all SDs it’s not all about sex. I know for the SD I’m meeting this weekend he said that my looks are what brought him in initially, but my wit, intelligence, and mind are what made him want to continue to pursue me. I guess for him (as it is for me) conversation is an aphrodisiac and so for me that’s a good sign.
You’ve officially become ‘refreshed’. When is your trip?
MissNN ~ I agree with much of what you said but caution you about putting all SD’s in the same category in pushing for the initial meeting. MY SD and I spoke on the phone for close to a month before meeting. Everybody needs to connect on their own level before they’re comfortable proceeding.
It’s a matter of whether or not you’re willing to trust and give faith in this person, albeit blind trust, that they are who they claim to be. They are taking a similar gamble and would only suggest people proceed at a pace they are comfortable with
From a fishing point of view, what would be the best place for an SD to buy a condo from Miami to Palm Beach? What features are key?
Nico, it is about a week away and can’t come soon enough! Glad things are going well with you. Good points re: lumping SDs in the same category.
Adios folks! I will check in tonight…
Been away on a business trips through several countries in Europe.
Tried to de-blog myself for a few days. Must confess it is so addicting.
All that stimulating conversation.
Thanks Suthern, I followed your suggestion to find the article and read it closely. Almost everyone had his say on it. I looked at it from a different perspective and was not impressed at all. The lady may teach journalism at a university, but fails as a journalist herself.
She lacks talent for writing and wanted to create a tear-jerker kind of story. She tried to focus on her title “kept women”, but jealousy got the upperhand, poor man picked clean to the bone by Lola !
I am a headbanger and Lola is one of my old time favourites by the Kings, nice bit of hard rock, so I smiled.
To be spot on, that is Gail with her poem in the spirit of Easter time.
“Is anybody happier because you passed their way ?”
Yes Gail, it is me. You made my day with your poem.
As to the last sentence: “by what you have done today ” Lisa-wise nutting.
Overal the reactions of SDs is so much more mellow ! But this is how it should be, mentor with wisdom brought by age.
By the way I loved the photo of Marilyn Monroe with the article. Related to the idea of “kept woman” perhaps the Kennedy boys ?
Vic – I enjoyed your “sparkling eyes”.
Again the suggestion came to the surface: how do you prepare for your first meeting with an SD ?
Think of it as your staircase to heaven. Study everything there is to know about him. And I mean STUDY ! Ask subtle questions about his hobby for instance. It is all about taking a personal interest in the other. This is the way to pave the path leading to that staircase to heaven.
What better than to be in Seventh Heaven ?
Good Morning Henri! I must say that in my conversations’ with Ruth Padawer, jealousy was not a word that I would use to describe her. She was very personable and full of life and compassion. She answered my very poignant questions regarding her reason for writing the article to how she sees the article’s angle or basis.
Good Morning Sugars! Ah nice to know that in the end you would only have a spark if it wasn’t for the $ugar or S(ex)ugar.
Nitemare…depends on what you’re fishing for.
I have heard through a friend who spends much of his time on his fishing boat that Marlin is best in Jacksonville.
Palm Beach is closer to the Gulf Stream so don’t know if that helps at all. If I knew what you were fishing for I could ask the specific question of my fisherman friend.
SE ~ I am so happy for you and yes, Exquisite Anticipation. I am seeing my SD again this weekend
Well, the topic is what would attract various SBs of various ages and types if one were buying a condo down there?
Fishing and condos…
from a leisurely activity perspective, Miami is the better choice than Palm Beach for its proximity to the Keys. Great sportsfishing there and well as good marinas to berth your boat.
From a dollar perspective, you can get really good deals on condos in Miami if you have the cash (since mortgages are a little hard to come by – ask NC I believe). Just saw yesterday, properties marked down as much as 75% for condos in the financial district. With deals like this, it’s a great opportunity to get a few properties and just sit on them for a few yrs. Value will return in a few years. Looking at it for my kid’s college education. better than a 529 plan.
Now…if you are referring to a different type of fishing, and based on your post nitemare, I am guessing you are, then Miami is the center to do your fishing. Ladies in Palm Beach are not in need.
Talking about the region from Miami to PB…
Im glad to see how they posted add about how good SA is but reality it’s pretty bad the guys are really abusing the females in there not to mention now they collecting pictures like MRben from new york be aware ladies, they asking for naked pictures too do not send none it shouldn’t be like that or about that.
just a heads up for the ladies
Sophie Welcome! No one is forced to send naked pictures of themselves. It is sad that some of the people on here are posers. But, there are many others that are REAL! Thanks for the heads up. Requests for naked pictures are not normal.
I posted a while back about my SD/SB relationship and advice. Thanks!
I just thought I would give an update and ask for more advice
There are real people on here and I have been one of them and on other sites. I wanted to get feed back from those here if the “sugar” I have been giving is enough. I guess I hear all the stories about private jets, weekends in Paris, etc that I wonder how I can compete! Well I have a very sweet 23 year old SB now that I have been seeing for nearly 6 weeks. We have seen each other in person 5 times. The first date I took her to a nice chinese dinner and coffee, paid for all and gave her $250 driving money. The second date I took her to a nice Thai restaurant and took here shopping bought her a $450 coach purse. Third date I put her up in a nice hotel by a huge outlet mall with $1100. Then came back in the evening and we spent intimate times together The forth date was at a nice new Hotel in town again same drill gave her the $1000 for shopping etc and had a nice time eating Italian food watching TV and then more “cuddling” Most recently I took her golfing…she is a virgin and I was happy to teach her! And gave her $500 for the trip.
All through this time we have been talking about every other day sometimes every day usually on yahoo chat sometimes for hours at a time. Oh I have also given her at least $500 in Amazon cash for clothes and a special hair straightener that she wants. I love being with her. I guess I am used to the crying, screaming, complainers, LoL but she seems really content. She really refuses to ask for anything so I am forced to play it by ear…
I ask her and she tells me that I am doing an excellent job taking care of her and she relly likes being with me. Its hard getting used to her quiet sweet ways. :p
Hello Nyland ~ I do remember you and congrats as it seems as though things are progressing well. From a SB perspective I would say yes, you’re doing EVERYTHING well ~ of course, as we’ve mentioned before it matters more what the two of you have come to agree on; however, on the surface seems ideal. Perhaps it just does come down to you getting used to her quiet sweet ways.
Nyland: Welcome back! Wow over 3k in six week. That is a very generous gesture. I am sure after that post you will have SB’s trying to contact you! Congrats on your sugar adventure.
NYland, I love that you took her golfing and devirginized her That’s very cool. I like that you take the lead, I think that is the role of a good Daddy.
NM…..West Palm or Miami is a great place and filled with SB’s from what I understand. I go to both often as my best friend lives in West Palm Beach and she’s mentioned there are lots that she knows of when I finally revealed that I use this site. I’d pick WPB as South Beach could be a bit much in the long term. Oh and never, EVER, lower heels. In times of economic distress go higher to perk you up mentally. Comfort doesn’t factor into hot shoes ever.
I’m off…..date 2 with my guy from last week. We shall see
Hi all! Jeez my comeback was poor! Lol! How’s everyone?
Gail – Long time no talk! The dark is workin baby!
This thread is getting stale (and painfully long to load) How about a new topic ?
Nyland, sounds to me like your a great SD. Hopefully the guy I’m meeting this weekend will turn out to be as good as you and some other SDs on here. Guess I’ll just cross my fingers and hope for the best.
sugarcookie – yes too long to load I agree…
This is actually my first time posting in the blog and think I might have my first potential SD date tomorrow. exciting !!
Nyland – did you steal my girl?
ha ha Southerngent…no I didn’t steal her but if I did its every SD for himself right I would love a southern belle but my sweetie is a pure bred midwest small town girl who likes coach purses, sashimi, and has the prettiest smile I’ve ever seen. And as far as it being all About sex and money…well it isn’t …I get off (for lack of a better term) on having her depend on me, ask me for things, ask advice, show her new things. It was a kick taking her to the driving range…seeing her giggle and laugh as she hit those golf balls, giving her little kisses and positioning her body in the correct stance. To me its ALL foreplay! And isn’t everything just about boil down to money and sex/intimacy filling each others needs? I don’t believe anybody is completely altruistic…but I care what happens to my SB and I want to be there for her.
Aww Nyland that’s so sweet, she’s a really lucky girl it seems. Where’s my knight in sugar coated armour.
GND: he’ll be along shortly enough!
If I’ve learned anything from these blogs it’s that patience is key :p You know that though. But I wanted to respond!!
This blog has been on topic and AWESOME to read. I’ve really enjoyed all the helpful advice. and I like seeing the new members here and there! Hi
Nyland: as the others have said, you’re certainly being the dream SD with everything that you’re doing. And it’s beyond the sugar, gifts, and pampering. It sounds like you really care for her too, for her wellbeing, and her future and whatnot. And that’s gold! I’m glad your SB hasn’t been afraid to tell you you’re doing an excellent job as an SD
Henri: I love that you popped back in!!! I’ve been lurking around the blogs but I always enjoy reading your comments! Traveling all around Europe, eh? I wonder if you have a favorite country to go to.. Switzerland and Germany are my fave’s.
aaaand, I’m not sure what else to add, so I’ll stop right there
Gail, you will let us know if you hear from Lisa? <3
Hey Katherine, yeah I hope so. Maybe this guy I’ll meet this weekend will be him. We get along really good and so I’m hoping that chemistry will continue into our meeting.
I need to go back and read up on everything, so I’ll still be here if anyone is up.
Zabreena, Gurl, thanks so much for the advice– it’s great just to hear from some experienced SBs.
I’ve got my first SA-arranged date to meet a pot SD tomorrow, and i’m nervous, but excited nervous.
I also wanted to say that I’m really thrilled that there’s such a community feeling here. As a totally newbie, I feel welcome, so really, thank you all!
Just dropping in. Mostly to repeat what’s already been said, Nyland, you seem to be a wonderful SD.
Henri, you’ve been missed! I envy your trip through Europe, I’d love to go there (all over Europe)!
Hello to everyone!
I’m trying to do homework, write an essay, and study for a test, all of which I must either turn in or take tomorrow… I’m such a procrastinator. Dear me…
How is everyone?
Tea you are most welcome and congratulations on having a date so soon. remember what I said about taking things one step at a time and not letting him rush you.
I think Ineed to clarify what I said, wen I said guys spel sugar s(ex)ugar I didnt meat that sex was all they were interested, of course not, this is sugar dating and of course it involves dating and a relationship but that relationship will involve sex. Guys could find sex a whol e lot quicker, easier and cheaper than using this site so they obviously must be after something more, which is great for us SBs.
Nyland you are doing just fine, keep up the good work.
Nitemare miami is indeed a great place to go fishing for SBs. I suggest you do a google maps search for lap dance clubs thay are mostly in miami itself. I work in one and know lots of great girls who are more than interested in being a SB. I also know lots of other girls with normal office type jobs in the city who are very interested too. Good fishing.
Zabreena, is that you with the pink bikini top and 5’10″ 20yrs old?
Tea good luck on your date today. Hope all goes well.
Vic good luck studying, I know I hate tests, especially finals. But on the bright side of things summer is right around the corner.
And finally for everyone who lives in Florida, I must say I envy you. It’s warm here in NC finally. But we still lack the year round warm climate and pretty beaches almost everywhere.
Thanks, GND! I need all the luck I can get! Unfortunately, I’m going to summer school, and, if I’m not mistaken, classes start there the very day after I’m done here… Fun, right?
I’m totally with you on the beaches thing…I wish we had’em in MS. We’ve got the lake here in Chicago, so there’s a plus.
Hope everyone’s day is pleasant! I’m being as quiet as can be, in honor of the Day of Silence movement. Have a good one, all!
I am heading to Miami area next week for business and you seem to be a local. Can you suggest some good places to spend the time? I’m not too familiar with the city and could use a heads up. Thx
It seems that the curiosity quotient of the article has subsided a bit based on the sb new memberships and the ease of logging in. Can any of the sb’s (ladies would seem rather presumptive as we have seen some male sbs as well) comment on whether there has been an increase in sd/sm’s since the article, or has it been mostly on the sb level. Curious as to that segment are the predominant paying members of the site.
Opov, I actually haven’t noticed many new SDs, but I haven’t actually been searching…Finals season. :-/
I’d also be interested to know if sd memberships increase now that tax season has passed us since this is discretionary income for many sd’s.
I’m new to the blog but not to SA. I think the blog is brilliant and even though I’ve been a member for some time it has enlightened me ALOT! Loads of useful info and loads of laughs! Everyone one here has a great sense of humour! I love it!
So after spending the last couple of hours looking through this thread I’m finally posting my first post…Whoo hoo!
With regards to the article in the NYT, I thought it was quite good especially the reasoning of “aren’t we all exchanging sex/companionship for $$$??” I mean if you look at normal relationships between a boyfriend and his girlfriend there is that exchange but if you ask me there is more drama in a relationship because of all the emotions involved – This is just my opinion please feel free to comment – I’m interested in what others think.
With regards to the whole SD/SB arrangement, I think its going to set a precedence in the so called “dating game” with more people nowadays interested in NSA/drama free “relationships” Its simple, online and apart from those fakes that ruin it for the rest of the SD’s/SB’s its upfront with most expectations on their profile.
I love SA and although not had any success (been of a few dates/meet-ups) its the best website around!
sorry been on a few dates/meet-ups… :p
Welcome to the blog London Lady
OPOV I’ve seen an increase in the number of SDs in NC. Now there are apparently around 500 here. Maybe one of those 500 will be my lucky SD.
Aww Vic, sounds like your taking a Maymester (that’s what they call them here). I was going to go to summer school to try and get some classes out of the way but now I’ve opted to just work all summer so I won’t have to work as much when school starts back up.
I think there’s been a definite increase here in London but not sure if its from the NYT article?
However the whole site for me has been uber slow over the last few days and often pages taking ages to load up or turn up with errors. Grrr! Anyone else have this problem?
Sorry to blog and run…but I have a 9am date with the spin bike at the gym tomorrow morning *Ugh* and its nearly 1am! Summer is on its way and I need to get my ass into shape
Hopefully meet more of you tomorrow, enjoy the rest of your days…
Lisa, raine and the others, I know you aren’t on right now I hope you read this the next time you are on. I haven’t been on in some time I hope all is well with each of you. I finally think I may have found me an SD we are meeting tomorrow for our first time. I am so nervous and yet excited this blog must have brought me some good luck because since I have been on here I have had numerous of responses! I hope lisa you have been able to find some one as well. I will try and get on tomorrow night when I get home I am leaving my house around 6am to meet up with him and spend the day together, how exciting!
I wish you lots of happiness on your SD meet and greet.
Yes how exciting, I also had that feeling on my first trip to meet an SB.
Katherine and Vick, thanks for the kind words. Indeed there are many places of outstanding beauty here in Europe, but even more in the States.
I have surrounded myself with many books, my friends. Perhaps my favourite is this one THE ANGLER’S LIFE and it takes me all over the States to marvellous places for fishing. And yes even to Miami and so on.
But Florida Keys is high on my list, Hemmingway etc.
OC, you really are the Fairy Godmother of the blog, standing up for eveyone, whose seems to be treated unfairly. I hold you in high esteem and you are on my list of favourites at SA together with so many others SBs that I know from the blog.
Somebody mentioned “community feeling” and that is what you do.
The weather had been exceptionally mild over the past few weeks and millions of flowers are now in full bloom here in my bulbfield region. Acres of colours as far as the eye can see. Wish I could transpond all of you over here, put you on a bike and take you along for an afternoon.
It’s national poetry month in your country, so here is one by Elizabeth Barret Browning for you to wake up with:
” Earth’s crammed with heaven
” and every common bush afire with God;
” But only he who sees, takes off his shoes,
” The rest sit around it and pluck black berries
Good morning OC,
I had better give you an explanation why I made the remark about the reporter. In the Bible we find many pot Cindarella SB/SD stories. One of them is the story of Ruth and Naomi, two poor pot SBs keeping themselves alive, picking up the left grains on the wheat acres, after harvest time. (hope I do not offend anyone now).
In the and the rich landowner’s eye falls on the girl and marries her, typically Cindarella.
A name gives you an identity and your name will influence your course of life. The meaning of names is important.
Read up the Kaballa on the internet and the importance of names.
You are named Ruth and someday your Prince will come, the rich landowner, it is deeply ingrained in you. Unfortunately he does not.
Then suddenly you try to write and article on SB/SD and you cannot help but put something of yourself in it.
Every author does, psychologically seen. So do I in my post !
So here it mills and stirs in the subconsciousness while writing, and your pen takes flight, wishing “where is that SD as promised to me by by name by birthright ?” Why am I not covered in clouds of SugarDust ?
Why this Lola ?
I would have written a happy feet tapping story about Lola and her SD.
But my pen is steered by my life’s experience on SA.
SEVENTH HEAVEN ?
Been there, done that as an SD, still bewildred.
Thoroughly recommend it !
Good evening Henri – good to see you again. I must challenge you a bit – using your logic, where you assign a trait to Ruth based on her name, you will find support for your theory no matter what she writes because that is what you’re looking for – she is doomed! She is predestined to be jealous because of her name no matter what she does! That is bad logic, my friend. I understand what you’re saying about the meaning of names, but you are comparing a life story from the bible that you are reading in retrospect with one article written by Ruth and assigning a trait to her based on the meaning of her name. Are only Ruth’s capable of jealousy? Or Lola’s sorrow?
Good Morning Sugars! Are OC’s only capable of spreading sunshine? lol
Ok, enough theology talk before I have had my coffee. Coffee and a hike in the canyon with my chocolale lab for me this morning. I cant wait to hear about all the sugar dates this weekend!
Great challenge !
Nice logic that you expose.
Thanks for your post which I really enjoyed.
It was just something that came to mind, when I read the article.
Have a great sunshiny day !
Nitemare, yes I am the one with the pink bikini top and 5′10″ 20yrs old.
Hi London Lady — yeah the website is slow because of the traffic created from the NYT article — Stephan put a note about it on the main blog page. They will need to upgrade their servers to handle the new traffic but I am sure change is coming and it will be good for all of us to have more SBs and SDs to choose from
Hi I am new to Sugar Daddy, how long do it
take to find a sugar daddy? How should i do my profile?
I wanted to wish you all a bit of a fond farewell. Lola and I have deleted our profiles and I believe are taking an indefinite break from the site – although we may still blog occasionally : ). I have decided to spend more time focused on my kids and family and she is incredibly busy with school deadlines and work at present. It has been over a year for me here (longer for her) and I’ve met some great women and also have a few SD pals that I value. I hope to stay in touch and I still have friends and family that are on here.
While I can’t speak completely for Lola, we have discussed the article and I think she and I both believe that things were printed that shouldn’t have been and that Ms. Padawer’s tactics selling herself as a sensitive academic bordered on journalistic ethics in certain cases. Call us naive if you may, but we were given multiple assurances. I still contend (and I think Lola would agree) that about 30% of the article about us is inaccurate or fictitious. I will again kindly warn any of you to be very careful in dealing with any kind of reporter – especially if it relates to the Sugar World.
I really do hope that you all are able to find what we have in your own way. We are friends I think now more than anything and we look to eachother for support in different ways. It really is a blessing.
One point I might make to Stephan and Brandon. I’ve noticed that some other sites don’t allow women under 21 to post profiles as SBs. I think it would benefit this site a great deal to actively match up new SBs (and even SDs) with veterans so they might end up in unfortunate situations less frequently. Of course we do live in a world of danger and risk, but we can try to make things better for eachother. (Perhaps $3-$5 off premium fee for being a mentor?) I’ve had potential SBs run off with cash never to see them again – and I know of lots of sad stories from SBs that are far worse than mine (pig farmer always comes to mind). Young SBs though I do think are the most vulnerable. This blog is good – but I think this site needs a better mechanism to help them.
Tara – to answer your question. How long it takes depends on what you are after. My advice is to be patient if you can, sifting through the mail you get for at least a month or so. As for how to do a profile. I am of the belief that personality and humor is important in the written portion, but that pictures should be tasteful. My view is that SBs should maybe post a bikini or other shot of they want to show off a bit, but leave the lingerie pics for private emails. The SBs here I am sure will have lots of good advice and may not agree : ).
Found this blog and I think its amazing.I’ve been a sugarbabe for a year now-celebrated our anniversity last week (still can’t believe its that long).
Anyway,I read the NYT article and I think it was distasteful.In my opinion Ruth did a mediocre job,the article was so one-sided and kinda depressing.The story about the art student/potential college dropout and her past SDs? c’mon. At the end of it all,the article made it seem as though SD/SB are relationships based on power struggles ie, rich men taking advantage of vulnerable young women and hot babes taking advantage of “old” rich men-I don’t know but my relationship is definetly full of chemistry,no games-we laugh together and we have tons of fun despite our age gap. Is anyone having a great SD/SB relationship? BTW,Nyland you rock!!
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