1 year ago
How To Tell Your Kids You’re A Sugar Daddy
  • Posted May 16, 2016

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For any father attempting to introduce a new woman into his child’s life, he is bound to face some awkward conversations. These need to be navigated with a certain sense of delicacy and sensitivity. Plus, explaining a Sugar Daddy/Sugar Baby relationship comes with added hurdles. Children, both younger and older, may not be able to fully comprehend the complexities of marriage or divorce. For the fathers on SeekingArrangement, below  are some tips on how to tell your kids you’re a Sugar Daddy. 

Make Sure They’re Ready

Only you know what your kids are capable of handling. Emotional stressors such as divorce, puberty, school work or shifts in family dynamics can weigh heavily on adolescents. I’m sureou remember how Earth-shattering change was growing up. If you notice your son or daughter is going through a tough time at school or struggling with their self-confidence, don’t add to their plate as there’s a chance they’ll be hypersensitive to the subject of dating. If your child has a relatively active social life (sleep overs, extra-curricular activities, etc.), then learning that their mom or dad is seeing someone new may not affect them, as much. They’ve got plenty of activities to keep them occupied.  

As a Sugar Daddy there is a chance your Sugar Baby may be in the same age range as your son or daughter. If that’s the case you can expect them to be upset by the news. Be patient  and understand there may be some resentment on their end. Give them space, but do not abandon them and continue to be a factor in their life. Plan some Father-Daughter date nights or Father-Son bonding time, and make sure they knows you’re still a great emotional support system.

Need To Know

Keep it on a need to know basis. If you have one serious Sugar Baby who might be popping up at events, going on regular vacations with you, or even stopping by the house, it’s beneficial to mention you’re seeing someone. You don’t necessarily have to delve into the intricacies of your SB/SD arrangement, but simply put, you’re a gentlemen and believe in spoiling/taking care of someone. On the other hand, If you have multiple, NSA Babies, this will require a much more delicate approach, so seriously consider if your children can handle the situation.

This goes without saying, but if you aren’t seriously committed to another women, do not involve your children. It isn’t a good idea (for any parents who are dating) to bring men or women around the house or to family functions if you aren’t sure they’re in it for the long hall. Children can very easily become attached to someone, so it isn’t fair to expose them to a person who might just be another notch in the rotation.

 

Be Blunt

Your kids are of the appropriate age (older teen, early twenties) and you’ve decided to be completely transparent. If you have multiple children, telling them separately would be best. They may each have different feelings or reactions, so letting them express these emotions privately will help ease the situation, and allow them to feel comfortable enough to ask any questions.  They need to trust you, so invite and encourage questions about your dating life.

  • Explain how your demanding work schedule leaves little room for traditional dating
  • You like to have friends you can meet up with for dinner when you’re traveling to different cities for work
  • Reassure your kids they are still your first priority

Be Prepared

There may be many questions, concerns and even disapproval from friends or family when dealing with this topic, so be prepared for any backlash or influxes of emotions. Do not get defensive, upset or brush your kids off if they have an unfavorable reaction. Be calm, assertive and understanding.

Every man’s relationship with his family varies in it’s uniqueness and can only fully be understood by the members involved. It’s your own prerogative whether you tell your children, spouse or ex about romantic relationships or dating. Remember, be sensitive to their feelings, don’t force a reaction, and only divulge what you think they’re able to handle. Do you have any other tips on how to tell your kids you’re a Sugar Daddy?

 

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42 Responses to “How To Tell Your Kids You’re A Sugar Daddy”

  1. anonymous says:

    I dont understand the need to share with children that you pay for someone’s company- they’re children with no knowledge of in depth relationships. You could potentially teach your young son to objectify women because he has yet to form other supporting concepts of women/sexuality , or teach your daughter that her father needs to receive some time of compensation for his money.

    If you have a SB you want to bring around your kids, call her your girlfriend if you and your SB are kissing. Healthy relationships aren’t confusing, keeps everyone happy.

    Also, you are not your daughter’s prince charming, you’re her father. Raise boys and girls the same, title time with your daughter “bonding time” vs. date night.

  2. Yes, it’s very important to tell kids such important news at the right time. First make sure they are stress free and in a good mood, then start a topic related to relationships or friendship, and then move to the sugar daddy topics naturally.

  3. Spartan says:

    I have a fantastic SB that would be a perfect role model for my daughter. I would have no problem introducing her to my daughter, but haven’t yet. I would never share the details of how I know my SB with my daughter, however.

  4. buick313 says:

    Looking for college aged girl needing help with education costs in the Southwest Michigan area. Need pictures and interests of candidate.

    Thank you

    Dave

  5. Anonymous says:

    how do you look that up?

  6. Anonymous says:

    mark

  7. Anonymous says:

    Wow, even my post simply asking why about way 12ish “this is a terrible idea” got deleted…

    So it’s full on censorship if the author doesn’t like the replies?

    • Anonymous says:

      And I totally destroyed my words…

      About 12-ish comments said his was/is a terrible idea. Yet SA has removed them.

  8. Anonymously says:

    Does killing J bird and Elaine and fatty and even Josh the hostile posh, somehow make you better? Granted, the hate has dimmed in great comparison to what it was; “thank you baby Jesus, teenager Jesus, grown up Jesus and every age in between Jesus!”
    But is there not a median of conversing that even all of us can astutely resonate on with objective commentatorship and a balance of respect In disagreement with a tongue that if divicive and with kindred ship as our congressman do daily?

    Just sayin, it’s truth.

  9. Anonymously says:

    For real? I am allowed 2 comments per day? Who pays your salary? I’d I was Mariah Carey or married to a billionaire would I then gain your permission to leave whatever comment I seek to leave without creating my own blog propaganda? And then get a Twitter following along with a snap chat following? It’s not hard to do fellas. Let’s be for real. There is something to be said for privacy. Then again there is something to be said for the sales tactic. I need not educate u further.

  10. Anonymous says:

    Eeks! Rough.. Not the other word

  11. Anonymous says:

    He he lol, I noticed that too ….

  12. Anonymous says:

    Nice post

  13. Asmi says:

    I find your article thought provoking. But more than that, I find the comments very illuminating.

    One of these reasons, I turned to sugar dating is because I need the strategic input, the experience and the wisdom a sugar daddy brings to the dynamic. But one of the things I’ve always detested is to be a dirty secret.

    I understand discretion. I value it, but I do not want to be anyone’s dirty secret. Which is one of the reasons why I politely refuse a lot of gentlemen.

    That said, I personally do not feel comfortable in meeting a SD’s immediate family, unless I’m going to be included in it. That’s because I would never want to lead him to the point where he has to choose between being with me or facing resentment at home all the time.

    But, will I resent being introduced to his family and kids? No. And I’m very capable of carrying myself off as a good work acquaintance, or a close friend. I am all for the diplomatic approach.

    I however, find the hypocrisy in some of the comments below hilarious , specially when someone says I don’t want my SB to be a role model for my kids. I personally would want to be a SB worth being a role model for young humans, and would rather be with a man, who measures my worth as person and not by the sugar.

    • Anonymous says:

      They bring little wisdom. Remember, men do not listen. They pigeon hole you and dispense drivel based on their blinkers. … Real life story: ex army married gigolo advises a qualified accountant to do tills at below minimum wage cash in hand …. yeah right, maybe you get a job, mate 😀 😀

      • Anonymous says:

        I beg of you, what is that you are injecting? I will ask my supplier to stock on it..

      • Anonymously says:

        Stock on it? Right, only to be a slave wager getting off on the financial bottom line. yawn. There are a million of those guys. Aexond to none. How do you stand out?

    • anon says:

      To Asmi, nice one sugar sister! I like your comments because the seemingly double standards of some people on this site make me feel like my blood is curdling. Very disturbing how someone can have sex with their sugar baby but not want that baby to be a role model for THEIR daughter….so good to know that different people take such different views and approaches to this site.

      • Asmi says:

        @anon,

        I agree. I just don’t allow it to boil my blood any longer I get amused and move on to the next sensible looking profile.

        If you honestly ask me, when men crib about not being able to find a good, reliable, classy and graceful sugar baby, instead of a gold digger, I feel like pointing them to threads like these :)

        Similarly when women ask me why is not the SB lifestyle for everyone, I feel like pointing them here too :)

        I’ve not yet found my ideal sugar daddy but I’ve certainly met a few very decent (yess! I used that word ) men on this site.

        I think the lifestyle does work in finding right sugar partners, only if both parties are willing to work at it.

  14. Anonymous says:

    I don’t really agree with the article
    I think the best way is to tell to the kids that you’re dating a woman and not a sugar baby (they are not obligated to know about the contract and how you met )
    Some are rather fragile
    And if the S.B is younger than the kids or their mother, You just need to warn them about this detail

  15. boo says:

    Many men want the young dames, but not if their daughter were a sugar baby! This has happened to a friend of mine. Now his 21 year old daughter is a baby and he’s having the most difficult time accepting that. It’s sad, though, she always knew he was a SD even though he tried to keep it from her. So now their relationship is strained because she considers him a hypocrite. He’s disappointed at her because she doesn’t need a SD because she’s got a real (biological) daddy to take care of her. I think what’s happened is that she became “groomed” into being a SB by watching her father. Kids know more than you think. So if you don’t want to see your daughter with a SD, then it’s best to be discreet and keep your affairs to yourself. Bringing a “friend” over is not a good idea. Kids know. It’s best to keep family and sugar apart, unless you intend on making the relationship a permanent one.

    • Malaiikaa says:

      I would say that your friend is simply dishonest and hypocrite.

      In this kind of case the parents are responsible for decisions of their child (the parents are supposed to be an example to them)

      That’s why before deciding to become a SD or SB it’s always necessary to think to your familly (your kids), to weight against and wonder what this kind of relationship is going to bring to you but also to you entourage.
      But the most important wondering ” I might agree if that was my little girl instead of this S.B “

    • Anonymous says:

      hear hear…

    • Anonymous says:

      Recently had a young SB “disappear” from the site because her father found out about her being on it. Now how did that happen? Ahem…

      • Malaiikaa says:

        Who’s know how did that happen ?
        I think he just recognizes his daughter
        If he really loves his little girl the best way is to stop his relationship(if it’s wasn’t permanent) and show the example to her
        Some girls just do it because they want to punish them father.

  16. Just Me says:

    My SB is amazing. She’s 6 years older than my oldest daughter and the three girls get along like sisters. (There’s 30 years difference between she and I.) I’m divorced and she’s been accepted as a part of my small family circle. Her parents really like me and what I’ve been able to provide for their daughter. (We had them over for Christmas Eve dinner, and her parents come to watch my kids sport events.) My advice is to find an SB who’s willing to be open about the relationship, then introduce her to your kids as someone you met online and leave it at that. If the two of you are genuine, open, honest, and happy as partners, age isn’t such a big factor anymore.

    (… unless maybe you’re the cheating ex wife.) 😉

  17. Anonymous says:

    The article is strange enough, but the combination of the article and the stock photo is surreal.

  18. Katie says:

    Ummmmm, funny enough my last SD has a son that is 5 years older than me. I am pretty sure he was never aware of me, I hope not anyway. This is a weird blog topic

  19. Anonymous says:

    Thanks for posting this article , I find it reassuring and thought provoking.
    Recently my lover’s eldest accidentally discovered his mum had a lover (she has 4 actually as well as her hubby)It led to some talks about whether this meant Mum didn’t love Dad and if they might get divorced. Pretty strong stuff for a young person.
    He is o.k. with it now and i am thinking about spending time with my love and his 2 sons. I haven’t wrapped my head around it yet and still have my own jealousy issues to work with ( having taken on a relationship with someone who is in a committed marriage) but hopefully with time and some wisdom and honesty and putting the emotional welfare of the children first, we can all evolve.

  20. Amused_SD says:

    How about this? ‘We met online and hit it off.’

    Why would you tell your kids more details than that? ‘Oh. I guess she is a bit younger….but yeah, we get along great. Go figure.’

    What are you supposed to say? ‘Yeah….she’s almost your age, but I help her with her rent, give her a few thousand a month in allowance and she has a SERIOUSLY banging body and gives the best head.’ Come on, guys. College age or adult kids don’t need to know that much about your dating life.

  21. Anonymous says:

    You definitely, 100%, do not need to do this lol

  22. Donna says:

    Had a related but different experience here – telling my kid I’m a Sugar Baby.

    A bit of background so this makes some sense: I was a teenage mother. While I was able to finish high school, I wasn’t able to go to college. Without that degree, I was stuck doing lousy jobs like waitress or file clerk. And, besides the low pay, as an added bonus I was always getting hit on by my bosses and male co-workers.

    On the dating side, things weren’t that much better. Although there were plenty of guys eager to hook up with a pretty blonde – once they found out that blonde also had a kid – most couldn’t run away fast enough.

    So I turned to Sugar Dating. After a few false starts with some potentials – I was lucky to find a great SD. He’s a business executive. One of the local branches was going through a transition. So he was able to use that as an excuse to visit a few times.

    We really got along together great. He offered me the kind of arrangement most SB’s only dream of – he’d set me up in a place of my own, all expenses paid, and a generous allowance on top of that.

    Now the whole reason for him wanting me to be a “kept woman” is that between his work and home, he has a very hectic schedule. He told me he tried seeing Sugar Babies before, but having to coordinate his schedule with theirs was next to impossible. He needed a SB that would always be available. I’ve literally gotten texts from him in the middle of the afternoon: “Meeting cancelled. On my way.”

    My new home isn’t spectacular – just a small, two bedroom apartment that’s located close to both his office and house. But it’s still nicer than any place I had before. And I have financial stability without having to work. Plus, I finally get to home school my daughter, which is something I’ve been wanting to do for some time now.

    Which brings me to my daughter. I knew this would be all but impossible to hide from her. For one thing, we’d have to move. Another, I wouldn’t be working. Plus, he’d be over visiting all the time, even staying the night occasionally when his wife went out of town. And I really couldn’t pass him off as a bf, since he was about twice my age and I was always calling him “Daddy.”

    I was naturally worried about how she’d take it. But at the same time I knew this was a once in a lifetime opportunity. So I sat her down and tried to discuss it with her as best as I could. I have to say, kids these days are much more mature and knowledgeable than we think! She was accepting, so I was willing to give it a try.

    It turned out the two of them get along great together. He often insists that she come with us when we go out. And he’s always buying her little gifts and has even set her up a small allowance of her own. For her part, she’s started calling him “Granddaddy” to go along with my calling him “Daddy.” Sometimes when the 3 of us are out together, people will mistakes for a family – which is pretty funny.

    All and all – things have worked out great for us.

    • Anonymous says:

      Great report. Thank you.

      • yougottabekiddingme says:

        You call him daddy…in front of your daughter…who calls him granddaddy…granddaddy who visits often and sleeps in mommy’s bed…and gives her money…

        granddaddy…

        granddaddy??

        please help me understand

    • Andre P says:

      Reads like your daddy is grooming your daughter to be his next SB.

  23. Anonymous says:

    Just call her “Girlfriend.” With people living longer and marriage as an institution stops being a life-long arrangement, dating people with wide age gap is becoming more and more common. Soon enough marriage arrangement among several people will also be legally recognized for a group of people loving each other, especially as more and more men drop out of the dating scene. Sugaring may well become the primary form of dating: as termed marriage arrangement of limited duration. The rest just do NSA hook up or drop out.

  24. Anonymous says:

    Never tell your kids you are a Sugar Daddy. End of Article.

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