4 years ago
Sniffing Out the Face of Frauds

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Online dating can be difficult. Because Sugar dating caters to a wealthier demographic that is much more invested into their relationships, it becomes a juicy target to those looking to contaminate the Sugar Bowl. We have taken the extra effort to protect our community through background checks, but as we mentioned before the best way to protect our community is remember that when it comes to Sugar Safety, to kiss and tell is acceptable.

As online dating grows in popularity, so does online-dating fraud. So how does one separate a “catch” from a “catfish”? Most of the time Sugar Daddies and Sugar Babies have to go with gut instincts outside of the usual verification. SeekingArrangement.com compiled a list of the seven most common qualities in a fraudulent online profile: “The Face of Fraud.”

The Face of Fraud (Percentage of 60,000 Banned Accounts)

1. Religion
    Catholic – 82 Percent
2. Relationship Status
    Widowed – 63 Percent
3. Gender
     Male – 29 Percent
Female – 71 Percent
4. Education
     P.H.D. – 54 Percent
Graduate Degree – 37 Percent
5. Location
     Nigeria – 28 Percent
Ukraine – 23 Percent
Philippines – 21 Percent
6.  Ethnicity
      Native American – 36 Percent
Mixed – 19 Percent
Other –  17 Percent
7. Occupation
     Engineer – 26 Percent
Royalty – 25 Percent
Self-Employed – 23 Percent

“By releasing this list of common traits, we hope to inform other dating sites and help strengthen their preventative measures,” says Brandon Wade, CEO and Founder of SeekingArrangement.com. “I can attribute the safety of our website to both our strict screening process and the implementation of our background checks.”

What other tell-tale signs of fraud have you seen?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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726 Responses to “Sniffing Out the Face of Frauds”

  1. rogerisright says:

    First off …Jeans and T shirt76 …you are your SB have entered into a business arrangement and if you are doing all of the things you are saying and are getting nothing you expected out of the deal then dump her. I tell my SB’s that there is no reason to ever lie to me and if they do then it will kill any trust that exists and will change things for the worse.

    Next, Hi everyone …great conversation you have going here …I have used SA for the last 5 years or so and credit this site for two two yr SB arrangements that were great! That said, I have vacillated on the issues (the main ones) being discussed here…. I have waited for a couple of dates before closing the deal and make it clear that I don’t want to have sex with anyone who doesn’t want to have it with me,…every man here puts himself at great risk by doing any different …but I digress. The reason I like this website is because they have been able to do the tight rope walk between being a prostitute/escort and girl next door. Many of the girls who are available on this site, in fact (I would guess) over 50% of them are not sex industry professionals …they are students and single mothers trying to make ends meet… which is exactly the girl I am looking for and its also why I have been willing to wait for a date or two for them to rationalize the happy ending. If these girls were escorts then obviously things would be different. I don’t want to be with a girl like jeans and tshirt76 is stuck with who always has her hand out and is always scheming for more …I am a car dealer and the last thing I want from a mistress is to feel like I am being worked.
    Here is how I view the start of an arrangement …it’s no different from any other person who is looking for a job…or trying out for a part in a movie or play, they need to try out and interview for the job first and I am the one paying her wages then she needs to sell me on why she is the one. I think too many of us think we need to sell them on the fact that we are the ones for her which IMHO is wrong thinking! Naturally when I put that theory into practice it doesn’t come across as harsh as I just made it sound so I tell the new candidate that she is welcome to wait as long as she likes but if things don’t gel fairly quickly I will make a decision myself …I also let them know that everything we do will be covered but their monthly allowance etc will not begin until the arrangement has been consummated and we conclude that we are sexually compatible. I make sure they understand that this is just like every other job in a lot of respects and needs to be treated as such.
    I have been extremely fortunate so far and those two arrangements ended because of college graduations followed by their relocation for work or grad school and I continue to be on really good terms with them both. One of the other things I have done which has been very effective in eliminating their fears of being burned at the start and has helped them overcome their initial fear of what they are getting themselves into, has been to put them in touch with one or both of my former girls (with their permission of course) That way they get the full lay of the land right from the horse’s mouth …they find out that the bills get paid on time every month etc. etc. etc. the good the bad and the ugly. I am only interested in a long term ongoing thing so the sooner they know what I expect and what they can expect the better.
    I have also found out that there are a lot of your typical ugly pig men who treat these girls like whores from their first email forward and who use this site to bang your hot girls with no intention of anything ongoing and making them feel like shit when the man is running towards the door seconds after he gets off mumbling some pathetic excuse and throwing a couple of wadded up 100’s at them on their way out… the 5 minutes of fun these guys get takes a lot of these girls off the market for this type of arrangement forever … which pisses me off.

  2. Suefit says:

    Hello
    ive been in this wensite 3 weeks already,looking for a SD to look after me like Jeanandtshirt76
    but the guys here are lloking for one night stand …..they mess you around, i have the impression of this website being a waste of time and in a way very dissapointed.
    the guys there not looking for an arrangement for long term,if they want a one night,it wouldnt be better get a professional girl without lying 😉
    i still have the faith for to find the right man…ihavent got anyone yet but the emails are sooooo weirds.
    please someone help me where to get one real sugar daddy
    have a nice day

  3. DorkyGuy says:

    @Jeansandteeshirt, @James, I suggest reposting your questions on the new blog topic.

    When a new SA introduces a new blog topic, the conversation moves there… most people won’t even see that you posted under this topic, because they tend not to come back to read comments on old topics.

  4. Jersey Darling says:

    @JeansandTshirt – You think? I have a hard time believing this is even a real post. If you’re not getting what you want, end it – ’nuff said!

    @James, you should try posting on the latest topic so we don’t miss your post. Desperate is never a good look for anyone. Sure, let him know that you would appreciate a ride to the airport as it would eliminate a lot of stress for you. If he won’t do that much, he’s not a gentleman, and he could probably pay a cab company with credit over the phone so he doesn’t have to give the money directly to you.

    If you need money ASAP, you shouldn’t get into sugar dating out of desperation… you are setting yourself up to enter dangerous situations you otherwise wouldn’t and will end up compromising your judgment.

  5. jeansandtshirt76 says:

    Gooday SD and SB, hope your all having a wonderfull day.

    I’m looking to get a few opinions. Entered into a arragement with a beautiful lady 12 months ago. She get an allowance of $4000.00 a month which usually turns into $6000, plus jewelry, hotels for her to travel, she drive a new car everything paid for, I give her money for new dresses to go out with friend at hight end clubs, spa retreats for her and her friends, cellphone paid for, gift card etc.. originally we agree to take is slow and she said she did want great sex as part of the arragement said she not looking for a relationship and an arrangement works great for her lifestyle and not something short term, which is what I also want to many fakes as we all know.

    I’ve offered to help her with budget and paying off bills cause she says she has some, she absolutely does not want to discuss anything about this, I’ve recently caught her lying to me about several things. Asking me for money to go see family, gave her money to fly home and stay in hotels. Then she at my house and it slips she didn’t go home to see family, went out partying with friends. I could care less would have given her the money to do that also if she could just be honest. When we go out for a evening dinner at a nice restaurant, she constantly glued to her phone texting.

    I’m thinking I’m being played.

    Just wondering if and how you got into and arrangement, was their a period of getting to know each other for 12 months and no sugar, not ever a hint of it, no kissing, no cuddling while watching a movie, always having seperate rooms in hotels while on trips. I’m pretty much just feeling like a bank machine and think it’s time to end it?

  6. James Johnson says:

    Well I have just started being a SB(1st week in)…Yes guys can be SB’s too. .But I have been on the website seekingarrangment.com and I must say I have seen a lot of SD/SM on the site, Many don’t have pictures and that’s hard cause I have a pic. The first night I set up my profile and got my pic approved I got an email from a then Pot.SD and we have been texting and talking on the phone and I should be going to meet him by next week, due to his travels this week. I’m not sure how to approach getting the 10k I need. He already told me “of course I will give you money but I haven’t given him the number amount because I am afraid, he will think that’s asking a lot seeing as we just met. He wants to fly me to his state and give me spending money and even put me in a hotel so I don’t feel like I have to do anything with him, spend a weekend together and informed me money isn’t an issue “at all” for him. So should I go for it and ask for the college tuition money The other issue is Even though I understand I cannot rush the process too much, I need the cash a.s.a.p. And what the reason might be that more people aren’t writing me back after they view my profile.? I want to continue this but the waiting around for POT’S to reply is kind of making me loose my enthusiasm about this, I really wanted a SM but settled for a SD because, he is really genuinely nice and we get along great…so far .. someone please who is experienced let me know some more tips, I have been doing all of my research from google.com to youtube.com and I want to do this. I need some advice, tips etc. Also I don’t have a car so It would be hard trying to get to a Airport, so is it too much to ask him for transportation to the airport, like a driver or a taxi. Am I thinking too much into stuff.? Help!

  7. Wosie says:

    New blog post, everyone! :-)

  8. Jersey Darling says:

    @Spicey I’m tingling with anticipation! Much like my fingers are at the thought of wrapping them around one of my nice, big camera lenses.

  9. SugarySpicey says:

    ^ I know I would, after paramedics resuscitate me. Jersey, sending you an email, girlie.

  10. Jersey Darling says:

    @Prince – You’d like that wouldn’t you? Teehee!

  11. Principium says:

    Why is Frank on a flying magic rug? 😉

    Spicey, if you ever motoboat Joysie, you better darn make sure that Joysie has proper CPR training 😉

  12. Jersey Darling says:

    @RDamien, I’ve photographed rock stars – you can trust me 😉

  13. Frank says:

    spicy-nice legs!

    Now where is London girl?

  14. RDamien says:

    Ha of course indeed. I’d have to negotiate fees from a distance, or maybe by proxy. Those lips can probably talk me into a lot of pictures.

  15. SugarySpicey says:

    Thanks R-Daddy – wearing nothing but 3+ inch heels helps the gams.

    Cunny – yes, Jersey and I are roommates, we snap photos of each other all day. Wanna see the ones where we press our boobies together? Never mind, that one’s just for my tickle bank.

  16. Jersey Darling says:

    @RDamien of course 😉

  17. RDamien says:

    This is a good looking blog. Spicey has great legs.

    Jersey – ah a professional, so strictly business then of course!

    Sweetie quite a few of the people that contacted me here were sketchy. One girl told me how much she was going to let me pay her and then warned me I better not have some Asian fetish when she was the one contacting me. I found a good match my second meeting, maybe too good. Overall I remain positive!

  18. Principium says:

    I tend to think that Spicey & Joysie are actually sisters and that they live together and take pictures of each other all day! It is official now as I have decided!

  19. SugarySpicey says:

    Thanks Jersey, a conversation I had earlier today may have sent me to bed early 😉

  20. Jersey Darling says:

    Petulant prats don’t pay penance to Princes!

    AKA There shall be no bean spilling! I’ll have to keep my corny jokes ALL to myself.

  21. Jersey Darling says:

    @Spicey – loving the new grav!

  22. Principium says:

    I have a feeling you are already dying to tell me, so I command you to spill the beans!

  23. Jersey Darling says:

    @Prince – always running in the background? I can think of a few funnies to make of that but you’d call me petulant 😛

  24. Principium says:

    I wanted to change Principium because it was my SA moniker before the last time. The last time I was Daemonicus 😉 A few of you already knew it anyway.

  25. Jersey Darling says:

    Changing names is such a hassle… only good for creative purposes and to hide yourself from the Google indexing monster.

  26. Principium says:

    Nah, still getting moderated.

  27. Princi says:

    I like slow starts. It’s not how one starts, but how one finishes 😉

  28. SugarySpicey says:

    Cunny – start slowly, move to Princi first.

  29. Jersey Darling says:

    @RDamien… You know if you have a hard time taking pictures of your back I’m a professional photographer…

  30. Principium says:

    I tried to steal PrinciClause but got moderated.

  31. Jersey Darling says:

    @Prince – Suddenly I lose my memory when trying to remember what I promised… 😉

  32. PrinciClause says:

    I stole PrinciClause from IcyPricySpicey! Hahaha!

  33. PrinciClause says:

    Dirty French? Is that code word for not bathing for a few days?

  34. lil_tm says:

    ^take some pics of RDamiens while you’re at it and send em to us!

  35. Principium says:

    “Or you can woo me with incessant flirting and promises of free HBO…”

    In case you were wondering, this one dig was directed at me.What a petulant little brat you are. Someone needs to be spanked. Will Magic Mike do it for me since he’s closer? I’ll PayPal HBO subscription and you ought to hook me up with the stuff you promised me, ala quid pro quo 😉

  36. SugarySpicey says:

    PrinciClause – I’ll take pics of your back, if you talk in your sexy voice, and throw in a little dirty French.

  37. lil_tm says:

    @lil – All my pictures I’ve posted since you’ve been participating on the blog are of me.

    ahh yes…I’d recognize the tatas anywhere. 😉

  38. sweetie says:

    RD, fakers are very common, both SBs and SDs. Gotta have tough skin and lots of patience. Screen, screen, screen.

  39. Lo says:

    k I feel a little better :p

  40. Jersey Darling says:

    Lil your current pic is you? The one with two people in it?

  41. Jersey Darling says:

    I’m not posting my tips publicly or else the cat will be out of the bag! PFT – Pay For Tips only! 😉

    Or you can woo me with incessant flirting and promises of free HBO…

    I learned the hard way by figuring out how to take pictures of my butt, LOL (oh, the candid honesty I show on here!). Plus, well, not to toot my own horn but I was a photographer and there are several ways to skin this cat…

    @lil – All my pictures I’ve posted since you’ve been participating on the blog are of me.

    @RDamien – why thank you 😉 Here’s another that (possibly?) shows them more… flattery will get you everywhere!

  42. RDamien says:

    In case she takes it down, lil_tm is a hottie confirmed.

  43. Wosie says:

    “the whole traveling thing makes me nervous too…like my mouth stays open when I sleep.,.I don’t know how attractive that looks????” -Lo

    Gawd, you crack me up so much! Guys get over that stuff when the other sexy hotness, sense of humor and intelligence is there. He’ll love you. He’ll be too busy looking at your breastssssssssssss anyway! 😉 I concur with Joisey. If you plan to travel with him, get as much info as you can and he should most definitely put you up in your own room initially if he’s a gentleman too. If sparks fly and you end up in his…no harm, no foul. But at least you know you have options while away from your friends and family with someone who is technically a stranger. If allowance didn’t come up, he’s probably not an allowance daddy. But sometimes those are the ones that after things get going (and going well), things progress naturally and the sugar flows a little more beyond the original arrangement agreement.

  44. RDamien says:

    Tina: best compliment I’ve gotten in a long time!

    Jersey: You have great lips. I’m sure you hear that a lot but there you go.

    Sweetie I can handle it! Sorry you’re getting useless leads, are fakers common here? I ran into at least one on the SB side.

    I’m with Principium, I can not do a self back shot for the life of me.

    Never heard of WYP either, but then again I never heard of SA before a few months ago so I’m a bad judge.

  45. lil_tm says:

    awww man! Had a busy day and I see I missed out on all the fun. :(

    Tina-Here’s to being sexy after turning 30. 😉

    @Spicey-No, that isn’t me in my picture..that’s Mila Kunis. I’m gonna put a real one up for a few…hope some other do the same ’cause I’m dying of curiousity!

    Ready, set,….go!

  46. Jersey Darling says:

    Prince, it’s had a much better translation ratio than site has for me. YMMV.

  47. Principium says:

    But WMP doesn’t necessarily translate into sugar. #imjustsaying 😉

  48. Jersey Darling says:

    @Prince – No silly, your iPhone is all you need! Thou dost assume!

    @Lo – Good question, I’m not sure. I’ve never tried without a face pic. You can try one with your face cleverly disguised if you like (posed at an angle where it’s hidden in shadow or something). But the interest I get on there is much, much higher than what I get on here, the guys have all been legitimate, and the process moves quicker. By the time they’re messaging you, they’ve already spent money to do so so they are literally putting money where their mouth is…

  49. Principium says:

    How do you know that I have the equipment for it? Are you misusing your privileges by spying on my iPhone already? 😉

  50. Lo says:

    but JD you have to put a pic of your face up to get any messages right? On this site I won’t put a face pic up.

  51. Principium says:

    OK Joysieee, so what’s my price? I’m taking bids and no token are needed!

  52. sweetie says:

    Jersey, got it!

  53. sweetie says:

    Darling, not familiar with WYP, I’d like to take a look.

  54. Jersey Darling says:

    @Prince, I can tell you the secrets on how to take selfies that don’t look like selfies… I already know you have the equipment for it 😉

  55. Jersey Darling says:

    @ Sweetie, I’ve given up on SA. It’s been nothing but bad leads for me lately. II’m focusing on WYP, I’ve always done much better on there. Those guys are actually ready to meet, and then I can decide if I’m interested in person.

  56. Principium says:

    Joysie: my grown up Son probably thinks that I’m too weird already, so do you think it’s wise of me to ask him to snap a few pix of my back? I can do the fronts myself, but need someone for the back shots 😛

  57. sweetie says:

    “@Prince – you mean you don’t have a repository of back pics ready to go? How else do you woo all the ladies? ”

    With the frontal.

  58. sweetie says:

    Jersey, you’re right. I’m getting annoyed at all the useless leads, though. What’s up with these “SDs”? Don’t they know better? I know, watch out for the fakesters… F’ing wannabes!

  59. Jersey Darling says:

    @Prince – you mean you don’t have a repository of back pics ready to go? How else do you woo all the ladies? 😉

  60. Principium says:

    DaFuq??? This blog just exploded since I was on a very important bid-nezz call. I gotta put my beanie on, do the pull up thing and take a back shot in B&W, so that I can always blame Damien for all the out of line sh*t which I may say 😀

  61. Jersey Darling says:

    @Sweetie I should have been more clear :) I mean if you’re already doubting him, forget it and move on… You should be going into things feeling good, not questioning someone’s story from the start. If you decide to invest more time, just keep your eyes open.

  62. sweetie says:

    Jersey “Sweetie, if in doubt put him out”
    You mean disclose him? Is that still allowed on the blog?

  63. sweetie says:

    “@RDamien: comment on your pics: holy shit…… ’nuff said…..”
    RDamien is probably all wet by now, all this attention… Can you handle it, RD?

  64. Jersey Darling says:

    Sweetie, if in doubt put him out… Unless you’re bored and curious!

  65. Jersey Darling says:

    I want to see the WHOLE back, but I suppose this will do… :roll: :)

  66. sweetie says:

    Ok, potential questions again. I got this message, he’s profile is minimum, of course, from Cali, he would be interested… I replied, requested pics, and got a response back saying he’s trying to be discreet, he’s a UF professor (why post location as Cali if at UF?). It sounds a bit fishy to me… His wages are ridiculously high, no way a prof. makes that much money. What do you think?

  67. Tina says:

    @Jersey – you’ve got mail!

    @RDamien: comment on your pics: holy shit…… ’nuff said…..

  68. sweetie says:

    Jersey, you do have a point there, oops!

  69. Jersey Darling says:

    @Tina, would love to see if you don’t mind sharing, I’m so curious!

  70. Jersey Darling says:

    @Sweetie, I have more shirt on in my pic than you do in yours 😛 A solid half of my boobies are still covered!

  71. sweetie says:

    Lo “like my mouth stays open when I sleep.,.I don’t know how attractive that looks????”
    Get over it, Lo. He’s gonna love your mouth :)

    Everyone else, wow, the clothes are coming off in here!!! Too hot for Sweetie!

  72. Jersey Darling says:

    @Lo, if traveling, make sure you get your own room until you feel comfortable, don’t travel with him until you feel comfortable, or just make sure you fall asleep after he does and wake up before he does 😉

    @RDamien – Thank you 😉

    Aside from faces (I’m not much into the physical), backs are my favorite feature. The taper from nice broad shoulders to a tinier waist drives me wild if it’s done right.

  73. Lo says:

    the whole traveling thing makes me nervous too…like my mouth stays open when I sleep.,.I don’t know how attractive that looks????

  74. RDamien says:

    Yeah last one for me, I cant compete with Principiums front so close to mine. I have a surprising amount of back shots I’ve come to realize.

    Thanks Wosie (I love your name btw), and Spice. Jersey: Looking good!.

  75. Tina says:

    @Jersey – I’ll e-mail you the full pic instead, k?

  76. Lo says:

    Good point about the allowance issue..I have no idea he didn’t bring it up over the phone but he did mention that he doesn’t want someone just to be with him for money.

  77. Jersey Darling says:

    Can you guys post some pictures of your backs instead? 😉

  78. Wosie says:

    You have to leave the Loubies on though. 😉

  79. Wosie says:

    And since the BF is away, I would sit back with my Hitachi and watch, Spicey! (My favorite kind of porn. Yummy.)

  80. SugarySpicey says:

    My tongue would totally do an MFM sammy with Cunny and R-Daddy’s torsos!!

  81. Wosie says:

    ⌃⌃ That was for Principal, but could apply to RDamien too. Lol ⌃⌃

  82. Wosie says:

    Well, I’m certainly not complaining about the current one (and I’m sure I’m not alone either). Hey I’m in a relationship, not dead. I can look all I want! 😉

  83. RDamien says:

    This is my only Magic Mike worthy shot. Limited time only!

  84. Principium says:

    Someone may recognize the top part of the mug. I’ll keep mixing it up 😉

  85. Wosie says:

    You should leave the other one up, Princi! It matches your sass! 😉

  86. Principium says:

    Open that PayPal account and we’ll P4P…(hoto)

  87. Wosie says:

    @Lo

    He sounds wonderful, but I think Princi is right. He sounds like BF material. No allowance included in this arrangement?

    @Jersey

    Since SA is my little secret past from pretty much anyone and everyone in my life, I don’t think I will ever post a recognizable gravie. I have posted a real photo of me, but it was highly ‘posterized and saturized’ beyond recognition and I still took it down. Lots of people read this blog and that makes me noivous! But I’m loving everyone bringing out their sexy today!

    @Spicey

    Hilarious about the autocorrect. I won’t deny that my positivity can be woozy to some people at times though. 😉

  88. Principium says:

    @ Wowsie: I instigated this explosion. I think Damien is coming back later on to Magic Mike the heck out of it.

    @ iCyNiCeYpRiCeYsPiCeY: I feel like a cheap Ho and I like it!

  89. SugarySpicey says:

    The blog SDs be rather lucky today 😉 I like Frank’s idea of P4P-hoto

  90. Principium says:

    Hey grasshopper, read Lo’s response and don’t you get cheeky with me. I am God 😛

  91. Lo says:

    I know right? What did I do to deserve being surrounded by such an attractive crowd?

  92. Wosie says:

    Wow! Legs and boobs explosion all over my screen. I likey!

  93. SugarySpicey says:

    Lo – lessen learned.

    Wozie – autocorrect that I found funny.

  94. Jersey Darling says:

    @Prince – Fiiiiine, you nailed it! For once can you not always be right? 😉

  95. Lo says:

    I think it’s because I can sense he’s really legit, and I don’t know if I can give it my all right now.

  96. Lo says:

    See Spicey??? This is what happens when we respond to guys we’d actually date IRL lol.

    Jersey–I don’t even have a good answer for that

  97. SugarySpicey says:

    Lo – it sucks! Though I’m not really ready for any strong feelings toward someone either, but we’ll see what happens. I wouldn’t be surprised to get a call in a couple of months.

  98. Wosie says:

    Lol @Spicey, now I’m wooziness? Deserving, I suppose, with my most recent confused 3some state of mind. Sorry to hear about your potential SD flopping. Blah. :-/

  99. Principium says:

    I already said as to why Lo is hesitant. Go back and read. I wish that the comments were numerical in here.

  100. Principium says:

    Just for your Joysie! Wowsie never posted any real Gravie, but Tina did.

  101. Jersey Darling says:

    Lo, I’m curious, why wouldn’t you go for it?

    Do we need to set up an exchange like I have with Spicey, where we can trade potentials who aren’t our types? :mrgreen:

  102. Lo says:

    Interesting twist Spicey…
    not sure Jersey..

  103. Principium says:

    My previous comment was for Lo before Spicy so rudely interrupted as usual!

  104. Principium says:

    ^^^ He seems nice and makes a great BF ^^^

    With that said, I just sealed his fate and nailed his coffin shut. High five, Dorky? FB?

  105. SugarySpicey says:

    Woozinesss – pretty disappointed. Lots of connection and sizzle, nothing physical happened, but he’s newly separated (and a dad) and felt that he was too interested in me in a ‘real’ sense to be seeing me and trying to figure out his marriage at the same time. So, I’m moving on and if he gets things figured out we’ll try again, if not at least I got an adorable present from him.

  106. Jersey Darling says:

    Changed my gravatar for a hot second.

    Tina I absolutely demand (implore?) you to post your pic again, I’ve never seen you! That goes for you too Wosie if you’re willing!

    Lo that sounds wonderful, are you going for it?

  107. Lo says:

    You guys are cute btw thanks for always being so accommodating to my ta-tas. Soooo yeahhhh I spoke to him today..he seems like Jersey’s type–the kind going extinct on these sites. Entrepreneur, not an all day texter which is good, wants a girl for charity/political functions, a travel companion sometimes for Europe trips and cities in Cali, a sugar monogamist, museums the whole nine yards. Not sure yet..

  108. Jersey Darling says:

    Still catching up on everyone’s posts…

    Wtf I missed new avatars?! Encore please, I was working!

  109. Wosie says:

    @Beach_Girl

    I spend a few weeks in LA a month, but homebase is NYC. I’m in LA for a big 3 month project now though! The BF lives in LA full-time, but has business and a condo in NYC so he’s bicoastal as well! :-)

  110. Wosie says:

    OKAY. So enough about ME and my REAL dating life. How is everyone’s sugar life going? Spicey – how was the one potential you were smitten over? Lo – did you make the call??? Inquiring minds want to know!

  111. Beach_Girl says:

    And sorry Wosie, I assumed that you were in LA… lol

  112. Beach_Girl says:

    Wosie~ I’m sure there are lots of Swing clubs all over. Also, you could do the masked kind of swing club too :D… just saying, there are more options out there.

  113. Wosie says:

    Thanks Beach_Girl. We both know a lot of people in LA so if we went the swingers club route we’d probably try one in NYC (where I spend most of my time).

  114. Beach_Girl says:

    Wosie~ Plenty of swing clubs in LA to try it out, if that is really what you want.

  115. Wosie says:

    And outsiders view people on SA as ones without morals. This is really a great community to be able to discuss all things intimate and get great feedback!

  116. Wosie says:

    @Spicey & Dorky

    Yeah, I think that’s why we’ve never actually followed through and have only talked about it…because there’s real feelings involved. Of course he’d *love* to. What man wouldn’t? I’m the one who brings it up all the time and I know, that alone, is a turn on for him…so my curiosity has just been growing. Not sure we’ll actually ever do it.

  117. DorkyGuy says:

    “So anywaaaaaaaaaaaay, bloggity blog friends, lately with all this FMF talk here and the BF and I talking a lot about bringing in a 2nd woman for fun (he mostly wants to just watch me with another woman and said he’ll only engage if I really want him to…)”Wosie

    lol, yeah, right… This is in the context of a BF, not SD, right?

    It sounds to me like he would *love* to do it, but is scared to be too enthusiastic, for fear of your reaction. “I will do it if you make me” is code for “I really want to do it, but I am afraid of hurting you. Please make me, so it is your decision, and I can be blameless.”

  118. SugarySpicey says:

    Warning: a threesome with someone you love, that seems hot in the moment, can make you feel like shit as soon as it’s over. I’ll swing with others, but my man is off limits – no matter how hot I think it would be to watch him bang someone else.

  119. Wosie says:

    Hmmm. Ok, thanks Princi & Spicey. Just been ‘toying’ around (pun intended) with the idea a lot this week while he’s been out of town. We shall see what happens!

  120. Principium says:

    If you do not know much about escorts, don’t mess around with what you don’t know for your first 3some experience.

    One of your hot GFs can be a potential minefield with a seemingly debonair and wealthy BF (who was who had said that the one thing both men & women universally agree on, is not to completely trust women! LOL!… the crucifix is ready now)

    I’m sure with your statuesque appearances, you should not have problems finding a suitor at a posh bar. But if you do decide to try SA, don’t let me stop you as your experiences would be delightful to read upon.

  121. Wosie says:

    AhsleyMadison? Never heard of it. I’ll check it out, Spicey!

  122. Wosie says:

    Well, he knows I’ve “dated” older, wealthy men in the past. He just doesn’t know I met them on SA and they were arrangements. We don’t believe in bringing up too much about our pasts – not because we have things to hide, but because we both believe in just living in the present and moving forward. He’s not a ‘judgey’ guy at all and we talk about everything under the moon and stars. I just haven’t ever felt the need to bring up details. I just really enjoy pleasing him and I know he would absolutely love if I went through with the FMF fantasy! Just not sure how to make it happen. ???

  123. SugarySpicey says:

    Rosie – AshleyMadison is the site a lot of couples use when looking for a 3some. Good Luck.

  124. Principium says:

    That is if you wish to keep it a complete secret, which if you do, is quite understandable.

  125. Wosie says:

    I really DO NOT want to hire an escort and I’m not going down the path of inviting a friend (though I have some HOT girlfriends). Meeting a stranger in a bar seems so…uh, I dunno…not my thing. (Never been into one night stand hook-ups.) Any other suggestions?

  126. Principium says:

    Yup, IMHO things have a habit of showing up if you revisit the past.

  127. Wosie says:

    “@ Wowsie: although it will be very interesting for the blog to hear about your experiences (from intro through intimacy) if you do end up seeking SB on SA for your 3some fantasy with the BF, I doubt it if you should go through the route.” – Principium

    Mi no comprende. Do you mean you think it’s a bad idea for me to find femme #2 from SA because it will intro the BF to a past that I’ve kept a secret?

  128. SugarySpicey says:

    I’m in the 30+ range and it hasn’t seemed to limit my sugar options at all.

  129. Principium says:

    @ Wowsie: although it will be very interesting for the blog to hear about your experiences (from intro through intimacy) if you do end up seeking SB on SA for your 3some fantasy with the BF, I doubt it if you should go through the route.

    I always remember the line from the movie Titanic (James Cameron’s version) when old Rose tells Brock’ “A woman’s heart is a deep ocean of secrets” That line resonated with me so much so that I actually do not conduct an interview or ask intrusive questions about the past history of a lover, only if she volunteers and even though, I may change the subject!

    Not a good idea for anyone who knows you intimately to find out as to whom your “Jack” was 😉

  130. Wosie says:

    I wish London Girl was stateside. She sounds like a girl I could get into!

  131. Beach_Girl says:

    Frank~ I am not at the beach :( I use to live near the beach a while ago, but no, I’m in Canada, the french part 😀

    Tina~ YEAH 😛

  132. Tina says:

    @Beachy: fine wine baby, fine wine 😉

  133. Beach_Girl says:

    Tina~ Hey, I’m the one that’s French here lol….Yes, working on building a career is always hard, I know 😀 And We both aren’t for everyone. I too and up there with ya 😀

    And I agree immaturity or maturity has no age limits, very well said girl!

  134. Wosie says:

    “Nonsense. I’d put some honey in your Earl Grey. So to speak.” -RDamien

    Lol. I like this Damien guy!

    @RDamien – I’d like to extend my formal welcome to the blog. I’m sort of new here too, but not really. Just to get you up to speed (so you know the cast of characters here a little more), I’m no longer in the “Sugar Bowl”, but was on SA when it was new and had great success with it! So I was a long-time lurker of the blog and recently came back to help a girlyfriend of mine find an arrangement. I’m dating a man now (15 years older, wealthy, generous) so I guess some could say he’s my sugar daddy, but we’re not in an arrangement, we’re in a real relationship that isn’t NSA. Thanks to the Sugar Bowl, I did get way ahead in life and make my own money (not anywhere close to the BF’s kind of money though) and pay all my own expenses, but he spoils me rotten. To. The. Core. Rotten.

    So anywaaaaaaaaaaaay, bloggity blog friends, lately with all this FMF talk here and the BF and I talking a lot about bringing in a 2nd woman for fun (he mostly wants to just watch me with another woman and said he’ll only engage if I really want him to…), I’m seriously thinking about making it happen as a surprise for him. Maybe I’ll be back on SA looking for a SB this time!! He’s home from his biz trip this weekend so I’m going to bring up the 3some talk again over dinner. He always told me to be in charge of “picking the girl” if we actually ever do it. (Oh and he knows nothing of my SA past!)

  135. Tina says:

    Maturity and immaturity have no age limits………….

  136. RDamien says:

    Tina I went in thinking nobody under a certain age. Unfortunately the first person I met here was a bad experienc. Immature despite her age.

  137. Principium says:

    Yes, that goes under the “what the fcuk was I thinking” category. A well, now it has been placed in the “been there, done that got over that” cabinet.

  138. Tina says:

    @Principium: there is an arrangement for everyone, I just think that people need to set their expectations. If you want someone that is at their sexual peak and/or comfortable sexually, more than likely you’re going to have a very hard time finding someone like that in their early 20s (I’m not saying that it is impossible, just less likely). But, if you want someone that is available on a whim if might be difficult to find that person in their 30s or 40s.

  139. Tina says:

    Spicey: we can split the 5 golden rings, 2 for me, 2 for you and 1 for the bad little boy that gives them…..and I never said his was a ring for the finger 😉

  140. Principium says:

    At Tina, my only SB from SA was in low 20’s. Too much drama and even sexually, i feel that I was regressed in the process. I luv me a woman who feels at her sexual peak and has been through her experiences so she feels ripe & ready. I hate to be the guy who babysits them in their low 20’s so that they can ripe up for some other cad! Fcuk that!

  141. SugarySpicey says:

    Tina – we already have eight ladies dancing.

  142. Tina says:

    @Spicey: or a pussy on a pedestal……..

  143. SugarySpicey says:

    RDD – you’re kind of a sweetie. Now we have the curmudgeon (SoftiB), the sexophile (Capitol P), the smoothtalker (R-Daddy), and the geek (Dorky), we just need a partridge in a pear tree.

  144. Principium says:

    I honestly prefer Monolos over Loubies. There’s Barney’s just around the corner, in case you were wondering 😉

  145. SugarySpicey says:

    CunnyHoney – we both know Loubies are designed to be pointed at the ceiling, but still their underside is sadly scuffed (I know there must be innuendo in there). I suppose I could allow you to get me some Manolos to make up for that. 😉

  146. Tina says:

    @RDamien: awww, thanks! Most men on here are looking for 20-something college students. I’m definitely not the “normal” SB….hell, I’m not “normal” anything 😉

  147. RDamien says:

    at 35 I’m not the cup of tea most SDs are interested in steeping

    Nonsense. I’d put some honey in your Earl Grey. So to speak.

  148. Principium says:

    I need to see how much of the red is worn off the bottom to decide whether you are really a hooker or just one in spirit 😉

  149. SugarySpicey says:

    Thanks RDD – and Capitol P – those are my hooker Loubies, just for you.

  150. RDamien says:

    Wow see I was right . Tina looks great!

  151. Tina says:

    @Principium: you’re welcome. (and man what a compliment – NOT!) Now back to the French Maid minion………

  152. Principium says:

    Oh yes, of course Lo & Treasured. My bad! TM is using an Avatar of her “likeness” so she’s a digital cheater! Haha… Oh and your 22nd face shot, well that was enough for me to give a faceshot 😀

  153. Tina says:

    @RDamien: I don’t look too bad at all, but at 35 I’m not the cup of tea most SDs are interested in steeping 😉

  154. RDamien says:

    Thanks for the heads up Prin. Sweetie threw me with the Bruce Wilis as did Diana at frist. Spicey nice legs. Tina I’m sure you look great. Wosie thanks for the hog tit lesson. I think! :)

  155. Principium says:

    Yes Wowsie, that was quite intentional 😉

    Thank you Tina for being a great sport. Now only if I could drag SDinLA & London Girl outta their caves!

  156. Tina says:

    Lo DOES have a nice pair of ta-tas!

  157. SugarySpicey says:

    Capitol – Lo uses her boobies (and I wanna motorboat that shit), TM uses her face, and I posted mine for 22 seconds – what are you complaining about?

  158. Principium says:

    Wosie, the artist formerly know as Rosie, no wonder I had already nicknamed you Wowsie! That BF of yours better have and carry an extra insurance policy for broken hearts! 😉

    Oh, I don’t even think that ElGordoDeBastardo is even a Gordo!

    @ Tina: I’m not an ageist daddy. I’ll take whatever you are willing to present of yourself 😛

  159. Tina says:

    @Principium: there, now quit whining

  160. Wosie says:

    Sexy skully cap, Princi! You look like the FRONT of RDamien! Lol

  161. Wosie says:

    Lol @Tina’s French Maid outfit!

  162. Wosie says:

    I wonder how many tits FattiB has?

  163. Wosie says:

    @Principium

    Au contraire, mon frère! Tits on hogs are NOT useless.The number of tits on a hog determines the number of tits (teats) that will be on his daughters born out of his offspring. The more tits on the hog the better. Many hog raisers will not buy or use a hog unless he has at least 14 or more tits.

    That’s your Agri lesson for today folks. Carry on.

  164. Tina says:

    Tina is a minion thank you so much! And I’m a little too old for most on here, so I prefer to be a little more incognito as it is! :p

  165. Principium says:

    Well Damien, the problem is that the other BlogDaddies don’t play along! I think that we are the only semi incognito ones, using our own images in some form and shape. iCySpIcEy & JDarling play along. Diana posted a dude’s picture and Tina is a silly sausage or something. Beach Girl has used her legs in the past and Sweetie channels Bruce Willis, in case you were wondering.

  166. RDamien says:

    Good job principium call them out. I’m new I want to see some of you all. I’ll post one up in a few hours when I’m done with this meeting.

  167. Tina says:

    @Spicey: dang paparazzi caught me 😉

  168. SugarySpicey says:

    Oh Tina! Oh la la!

  169. Tina says:

    How about I show you my French Maid outfit instead? 😉 Coming shortly when gravatar updates………….

  170. Principium says:

    Tina, drop the psychobabble and show me your boobs! 😛

    Pricey: that was a triple negative! 😛

  171. SugarySpicey says:

    The Hitachi never did nothing to nobody.

  172. Tina says:

    Just because you’re not an exhibitionist on a public blog doesn’t mean you don’t know how to work it. I just prefer to select my audience personally 😛

  173. Principium says:

    I dare, I dare, I dare, I dare, I dare…

  174. Principium says:

    I blame the Hitachi. I honestly do!

  175. SugarySpicey says:

    Cunny – are you egging me on? I never could resist a dare.

  176. SugarySpicey says:

    I’m in love! Large man with a cigar, and no info in his profile just sent me:

    “I’m interested, send me private pics to xxx email.”

  177. Principium says:

    I think that Joysie & me are the biggest exhibitionist Hos on this blog (I’m 1-A she’s 1-B) with Pricey running a close 2nd (when sh’es not posting photos of some remote islands) and RDamien in the third. The rest of you are as useless as tits on a hog!

  178. SugarySpicey says:

    Cunny – pout! You give me no credit! :(

  179. Principium says:

    Will only be up for a short amount of time. I was naked in the bedroom earlier on today, but no one on the iPhone Rolodex was avail to join me. Waaaahhhh!

    Hard to zero in on the Gravatar arrangement! It gets pixelated too much!

  180. Tina says:

    @Principium: sure, why not? We can compare eyes 😉

  181. Principium says:

    Bedroom eyes here! Wanna see? 😉

  182. SugarySpicey says:

    Frank – it’s because I sit on a phone book.

  183. Frank says:

    Spicey- you write taller than 48″

  184. Bummed BF says:

    I just found out my gf of 18 months has a profile on the site. She quit her job and has been leaving town for “modeling” jobs for 2-3 days at a time. One of my friends told me about her profile. I looked at it from his account and my heart sunk and I felt like I died inside. I can’t believe I was so stupid for trusting her. Vent over :(

  185. Jersey Darling says:

    While my legs are nice, they’re not the part of me I like to show off… I think most of the bloggies know what that is 😛

    Overall curviness is my best feature, with boobs/butt being a second depending on who I’m talking to.

  186. Jersey Darling says:

    Spicey, you’re 5’0? Looks like you win the award for being shortest! I’m just under 5’3.

  187. RDamien says:

    I’m 5’11 let me see if I have any tasteful leg shots… All heights are welcome to post away!

  188. SugarySpicey says:

    *SpinnerSpicey takes her five feet of nothing and pouts in the corner, while putting on six inch heels.

  189. Tina says:

    @Beachy: good to hear! Anything new and interesting? I’m still working on my career, but I’m getting there! I’m a determined lil thing.

    And hey, don’t discount the average girlies! I’m juuuust a tad under 5’6″……

  190. Frank says:

    Beach girl- we’ve been trying to entice London girl into a show and tail game, but you are welcome too. Since you are at the Beach, maybe a string bikini shot would be good.

  191. SugarySpicey says:

    @Jersey, yes – the extra inch makes little Spicey run away :) lol

  192. Jersey Darling says:

    @Beach_Girl – you know, that extra inch makes a difference 😉

  193. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars!

    Dorky~ Maybe you should go the Trekkie Dating site, lol… yep, there is such a thing 😀

    Tina~ I’ve been good…

    Frank~ I put up my leg shot for you and i got nothing.. lol, I’m 5’9, is that too short?!?! lol

    Welcome to all the new bloggers 😀
    Have a great day

  194. Frank says:

    LondonSB-you are 5′ 10″? then I think it is decided, a leg shot is definitely in order. And I will P4P (that does stand for pay for photo, right?)

  195. Tina says:

    Someone may be bringing sexy back, but the Dorkster is definitely bringing the nerdy back! 😉

  196. RDamien says:

    Thanks Wosie. You have a very sexy silhouette!

  197. Wosie says:

    “Suppose you’re right. Would you mind giving me a hand of your own? :D” -lil_tm

    As soon as I’m finished with my own Ménage a moi! 😉

    @DorkyGuy

    MajQa’! Lol. 😉

  198. mittens says:

    Good lord, it should not be this tedious to get to the botttom of this page.

  199. DorkyGuy says:

    As a service to some of our more exotic sugarbabies from “out of town”, here is the blog translated into Klingon:

    [img]http://www.microsofttranslator.com/bv.aspx?from=en&to=tlh-qon&a=http://blog.seekingarrangement.com/sniffing-out-the-face-of-frauds[/img]

  200. lil_tm says:

    “Rub it in? Now you’re just diggin’ your own hole”

    Suppose you’re right. Would you mind giving me a hand of your own? 😀

  201. lil_tm says:

    “I wonder if that’s an age thing. I dont know that 22 year old me would/could do that but right now it seems like the obvious choice.”

    hmm..could have something to do with maturity, but there are some people(male and femmes) that never grow up. :)

  202. Wosie says:

    Fact: RDamien has a sexy back. Move over, JT! 😉

  203. DianaSBinOC says:

    “There is one undeniable benefit to MFM that might entice me to try it.”

    “When your jaw starts to lock up, or you start to pass out from being unable to breathe, you can tag the other guy in and watch some TV.”

    ^ lol Dorky!!

  204. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Principium-

    ” Diana! You bottle rat to?! Tsk… Tsk…”

    No I kinda took a step away from liquor after watching a few people wake up in their own dinner. It’s not pretty and I’m not a fan of that view. Plus I always hated the ” hey drive me to..” It always made me thing ” nope I’m not interested in spending Sunday morning getting my car detailed due to your shenanigans from Saturday night”. Take a cab! Ha! lol

    I’m actually the person that is holding a colorful drink in hand that never seems to get empty. Yes I’m a drinking poser all for the cool club photo spread. lol

    What’s even weirder is that I didn’t even know what a bottle rat was but after a few moments it made sense lol. Seriously where do you men come up with those terms?

    This ^ is exactly why I enjoy having male friends. My current favorite is the ” Mac Force Field” ie girl that wears too much makeup.

    Accents don’t bother me as much. I can’t really make someone feel bad for something they generally have no control over. Obviously if they were speaking their own language it would sound just fine yet I would be the one with the funky accent. Hmmm

  205. Wosie says:

    @lil_tm

    Rub it in? Now you’re just diggin’ your own hole. 😉

  206. RDamien says:

    “In my experience, it’s the rule…if we’re talking sugar land.

    IRL..well, that’s another story. ”

    I wonder if that’s an age thing. I dont know that 22 year old me would/could do that but right now it seems like the obvious choice.

  207. RDamien says:

    DianaSBinOC says:
    Funny I actually had to look up “Dine at the Y”–got it!
    and what is “BBBJTCNQNS”??
    Someone has to provide some definitions here.

    DATY is dine at the y, and I know what BBBJ is then I dont know the rest … ah but urban dictionary apparently knows: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=bbbjtcnqns

    Glad that guy bowed out quickly for you Diana, better off.

  208. lil_tm says:

    “I like that story. That is my idea of how men should act. I just wonder if that is the exception or the rule.”

    In my experience, it’s the rule…if we’re talking sugar land.

    IRL..well, that’s another story. Way more bad apples, although I’m sure many of the ladies here would disagree with me.
    They seem to have had a lot of bad experiences for whatever reason, but I guess I’ve lucked out. : )

  209. lil_tm says:

    “Were you “poking fun at yourself” again, lil_tm?”

    No need to “rub it in”

    😉

  210. RDamien says:

    EllenSugarB says:
    “I have a happy SD story to share:”

    I like that story. That is my idea of how men should act. I just wonder if that is the exception or the rule.

  211. Wosie says:

    Were you “poking fun at yourself” again, lil_tm? 😉

  212. lil_tm says:

    My boyfriend and I just had an erotic talk as well.

    *looks at hand*
    😉

  213. Wosie says:

    @Lo

    You know we’ll all be waiting on an update after this call!! :-)

    I’m pretty sure SDinLA is a guy. Where did I miss that (s)he is a she?

    The BF is currently traveling on biz. He just called and when he asked what I was doing to pass the time while he’s gone, I told him I’ve been busy having erotic threesome talk with friends. I think I got him worked up. Lol!

  214. lil_tm says:

    “LOL you know I will”

    If he sux, tell him your friends are waiting on ya. :)

  215. lil_tm says:

    “@lil_tm: ummmm, nope, SDinLA is definitely NOT female. He just puts a pussy on a pedestal for his gravatar……”

    That’s exactly what I told him!(her)
    But I know I saw someone call him and her earlier.

  216. Lo says:

    At worst, the phone call will suck and you can hang up and come back and tel us about it. 😉

    LOL you know I will

  217. Tina says:

    @lil_tm: ummmm, nope, SDinLA is definitely NOT female. He just puts a pussy on a pedestal for his gravatar……

  218. lil_tm says:

    SDinLA is a girl?? haha! You learn something new every single freakin’ day. :)

    “Okay so uh…the wholesome looking computer guy wants me to call him before we meet and I seriously don’t know why I’m freaking out about it. I think I prefer just meeting people in person instead of calling them? I don’t know but this is scarier then when I went bungee jumping in Queenstown….”

    I get that way sometimes…the old butterflies in the tummy, eh? It’s the expectations that does it, imo. You have to come to the realization that you have nothing to lose. At worst, the phone call will suck and you can hang up and come back and tel us about it. 😉

    “As much as women love to talk and I pride myself for being a “great” listener, the pitch and the tone either puts me in the mood to listen or it doesn’t. Plus, f there is an accent like someone is talking to me in TurkSeralish, I will also have to bow out!”

    I’m told my voice sounds like a lullaby. I’ll have to sing you some Civil War tunes someday.

  219. Wosie says:

    You guys are putting a lot more into this over-thinking brain ‘o mine about this MFM idea. Tag teaming, TV watching, sammich making, cuddling??? I’m tired and bored already. I think I’ll stick with ONE man for now. Oh and cuddling? I’m like a dude in that department. When sexy time is over, no cuddling for me. I want to roll over and fall asleep!

  220. Tina says:

    @Dorky: or you could hand off when it’s time to cuddle, let him do it and go make a sammich. On Clooney, I think I like him because he’s a bit of a prankster. A sense of humor makes a man SO much more attractive to me. I tend to have a very serious, analytical mind, so having someone around to remind me to laugh and be silly is absolutely wonderful :) Sean Connery and Harrison Ford are both sex symbols, I will agree, but I have to say that I prefer mini me to Fat Bastard. I prefer someone that will try to get into my belly instead of wanting me in his 😉

  221. Principium says:

    I’m an older guy (49 Yr 9 Mo 28 Days 10 Hrs 15 mins & 25 Secs) but who’s counting?!

    In any case, I’ve always been text savvy as some may attest to this, but I need to hear someone’s voice over the phone or it ain’t gonna happen! Why? Because if it is an extremely annoying squeaky & mousy voice, I’ll be out.

    As much as women love to talk and I pride myself for being a “great” listener, the pitch and the tone either puts me in the mood to listen or it doesn’t. Plus, f there is an accent like someone is talking to me in TurkSeralish, I will also have to bow out!

  222. SugarySpicey says:

    Dorky – if it’s taking that much effort you’re doing it wrong. Need a teacher?

    Lo – Oh, I figured he was the other guy you mentioned. Why not have a call?

  223. Principium says:

    ^^^ It depends on what medium, tool or method you use to tag the other guy with ^^^ 😉

  224. DorkyGuy says:

    There is one undeniable benefit to MFM that might entice me to try it.

    When your jaw starts to lock up, or you start to pass out from being unable to breathe, you can tag the other guy in and watch some TV.

  225. Wosie says:

    @Lo

    He probably just wants to get a good feel of chemistry over the phone. I know, sounds strange, but you can tell sometimes if you’re going to connect with someone based on a phone conversation. Remember you’re usually dealing with men from a different generation/ one where people used to actually talk on the phone and texting didn’t exist. Some older men are just more comfortable that way. View it as a step he wants to take courting you. 😉

  226. Lo says:

    Hi Sugar, he visits California for work and I don’t think he’s a sub…unless he’ll reveal that he is later..Yeah I’m usually pretty social but I don’t know what to say???

  227. Wosie says:

    @Lo

    What are you mostly freaked out about? Actually having a conversation? What he’ll ask you?

  228. SugarySpicey says:

    Lo, I happen to know a geeky Cali subby who looks wholesome and likes phone chat … curious 😉

  229. Lo says:

    you guys im still freaked out…what’s wrong with me…

  230. Lo says:

    Diana they really are the best. I’ve seen my friends cheat on their boyfriends of several years at those pool parties because you feel like you’re stepping into an alternate reality and the same rules don’t apply lol.

    Okay so uh…the wholesome looking computer guy wants me to call him before we meet and I seriously don’t know why I’m freaking out about it. I think I prefer just meeting people in person instead of calling them? I don’t know but this is scarier then when I went bungee jumping in Queenstown….

  231. Wosie says:

    I’m usually sent out by my BF’s single friends to invite Bottle Rats into our section. They love it because I’m so picky!

  232. Principium says:

    Diana! You bottle rat to?! Tsk… Tsk…

  233. Principium says:

    Wowsie: The original plan was to lock her up at SDinLA’s second floor and then surprise her with FBSD popping outta the closet (figuratively and literally) but SDinLA has taken a hiatus.

    You girls must stop hammering me on the 1/2 way proposal. It was just a starting offer! Better to start from somewhere and go higher than the other way around, like FakoDaddies.

    I mean how about this offer:

    Oh Baby, I’ll fly you out to my Penthouse in Maui via First Class, blah, blah… Then it turns out that FD lives in his Mom’s basement. Come on Wowsie, you’re the Bid-Nezz MBA from the brass knuckles school 😉

    In any case, we are going to meet in La Jolla as she wants to pop in and say Hi to both Ann & Mitt 😛

  234. DianaSBinOC says:

    Anyone want to second that vote?

    Aye!

    @ Lo –

    “I met them at a day time pool party and we went up to their hotel room. One guy also had a little trouble staying hard because there was another guy in the room HAHA”

    Lol Aren’t pool parties the best? I love the summer sessions. I already know summer time means less clothing , drinks and for some reason no one really gets in the pool with the exception of the Roosevelt pool party bashes. I usually have couples approach me but eh they go through so much bs trying to get a girl to go home with them. It’s like cheesy pick up lines men use but now it’s from a team.

    The closest I’ve come to a MMF threesome is on the dance floor with two gay men. Well maybe one gay man and the other bi. Guy was moving so well on the dance floor he was actually making me look bad lol

    @EllenSugarB
    “I am slightly intimidated by the two-man setting…”
    As I am as well. I think once I feel more than two hands on me plus some kissing? Ugg ready! Hahah:)

    @Wosie-

    “Yeah, that whole think reeked of a guy not very knowledgeable of the arrangement world. He just wants to be in an NSA relationship, not be an SD. NEXT!”

    I agree. He obviously thought dropping “relationship” would make me forget about the sugar part. lol funny guy but wrong site.

  235. DianaSBinOC says:

    @EllenSugarB-

    Thank you for sharing your lovely story of a true gentleman :)

  236. Wosie says:

    “It was fun and I was also a little under the influence.” -@Lo

    I would definitely have to be under the influence of major liquid courage, I think. Pretty sure I could do the FMF thing before the MFM. But I think it’s crazy sexy to think about!

    “Bloggers- Remember the pot SD that discussed wanting to go from sugar to an open relationship? Well his acct is now closed. I suspect he read the blog and Rosie I’m pretty sure you were dead on…”-DianaSB

    Yeah, that whole think reeked of a guy not very knowledgeable of the arrangement world. He just wants to be in an NSA relationship, not be an SD. NEXT!

  237. Wosie says:

    Getting back to that VOTE from earlier…

    I vote YeS for Princi getting locked up and teased by Icy Spicey! But none of that “meeting half way” ish. Fly her to your dungeon of choice. 😉 Anyone want to second that vote?

  238. Principium says:

    @ Wowsie: I just keep changing your moniker by a bit, just to keep one step ahead of you 😉 Obviously the reference about the BF being ramrod by another dude was a widdle joke (well, kinda!) It seems that we need more cool chicks like you and Spice Gurl to hang with our clique. You can always snag Spice from SLC to watch with the BF. I hear she’s currently single & ready to mingle 😉

  239. SugarySpicey says:

    Time to put on my grown up face to go into a somber meeting. :(

  240. SugarySpicey says:

    Wowzie! Love it! I’m so with you on watching my man give it to someone else!!! Hot!!!!

  241. Principium says:

    @ Lo: where were you bottle ratting at? LOL!

  242. Wosie says:

    Lol, I went from Rosie to Wosie to Wowsie!

    @Princi

    Oh, I have zero interest in watching a man f**k my BF. Nothing about that thought turns me on. Now the thought of seeing him with another woman though…makes me tingly with thunder down under. 😉

  243. EllenSugarB says:

    Lo, you are brave. I am slightly intimidated by the two-man setting… Glad you liked it!

    Hi Diana :) Thank you.

    Hi Wowsie. I’m glad you have had some good experiences, as well. THe possibility is certainly out there.

  244. Lo says:

    I met them at a day time pool party and we went up to their hotel room. One guy also had a little trouble staying hard because there was another guy in the room HAHA

  245. EllenSugarB says:

    Sometimes we reap what we sow. And sometimes we sow delicious fruit tree seeds and we reap weeds. Just sayin’.

    ….Oh I have some baaaaadddd SD stories, too! just wait…. But I don’t take the bad or the good too personal. If any of you have read the study by Guru on SB/SD success/failure rate from initial introduction to reaching an arrangement you will se that the chances of finding a good SD are rare. My stats are a little more favorable than those listed by Guru. I have had over 70 initial contacts in three years; 5 came into fruition as a good arrangement.

    Diana you are right, an open relationship is NSA without sugar. He will likely create another profile and continue his poaching under a new alias.

  246. Lo says:

    !Lol well well well have some furreaaks on this board! It was fun and I was also a little under the influence. It wasn’t redtube worthy though..meaning no dp hahaha. Yes I would do it again but only if I’m equally attracted to both men. In this case I was a little more attracted to one guy over the other, so I would kind of ignore the other guy poor thing lol.

  247. EllenSugarB says:

    Wheres Dorky Guy with the funny one liners?

  248. Principium says:

    @ Wowsie, I think this is what you really wanted to say but dared not:

    “I love the fantasy of MFM, but not sure I will ever go through with it, but like I said, I’m 100% curious so the right man could probably easily convince me. Current BF has zero interest in seeing me watching another man f**k him.”

  249. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Lo

    “I’ve done MFM..in Vegas…you can all live through me ”

    Details , details I want to hear all!! I’m foaming at the mouth here!!! HA!!

  250. Principium says:

    “Princi – Clearly you want to meet Madame Spicey, you just have to beg.”

    You are your blog half-sister Joysie always assume the sale! Well done girls! You are both fast learners from me!

  251. Principium says:

    @ Ellen: We reap what we sow. A lesser woman may not have been able to land that gentleman. I have a strong feeling that he also has very kind thoughts and memories of you. Thank you for sharing your warm story.

  252. Wosie says:

    @Lo

    Ooooh, just answer this: did you enjoy it and would you do it again?

  253. DianaSBinOC says:

    Bloggers-

    Remember the pot SD that discussed wanting to go from sugar to an open relationship? Well his acct is now closed.

    I suspect he read the blog and Rosie I’m pretty sure you were dead on with
    ” I would be curious to know what he thinks the differences between the two are. Open relationship seems like NSA without the sugar to me.”

    It’s bad enough people call themselves sugar daddies off of providing dinner but this guy apparently decided to go all out. lol

  254. Wosie says:

    Love your happy SD story, Ellen! I’m one of the rare ladies (so it seems) with a pocketful of sunshine SD stories.

  255. EllenSugarB says:

    Brian Lochte is certainly an icon of desire. Carnal desire.

  256. Lo says:

    Ellen you sound like you had a wonderful SD, I can only hope to be so lucky!

  257. Lo says:

    I’ve done MFM..in Vegas…you can all live through me 😀

  258. SugarySpicey says:

    Princi – Clearly you want to meet Madame Spicey, you just have to beg. 😉

  259. EllenSugarB says:

    I have a happy SD story to share:

    A girlfriend and I decided to go to a nice restaurant for “girls night out” dinner. As we are being seated at our table I notice that my prior SD is seated a couple of tables down from us. This came as quite a surprise as we have never ran into one another in public unless we had planned it prior. He stood up and we walked over to say hello and I introduced him to my friend. It has been quite a while since we have seen each other and I must say that it was really nice to run into him. We continued on with our meal. He finished dinner before we did and stopped by our table to say goodbye. My friend and I finished shortly after and when we asked for the check the waitress said, “The gentleman that was seated at the table over there has taken care of your meal.” Wow. I was surprised. That was very nice of him.

    There are many bad seeds SA, but there are some very good men, as well. I have to take a minute to give this man praise, albeit anonymously. Few men truly embody the qualities of a genuine SD. This man does. He is a very special person to me as my friend, my mentor, and always a total gentleman, and my SD. He was there to empower me mentally, emotionally, and financially. And I am lucky to have met him.

  260. Principium says:

    @ Diana: “Is there a reason why these aren’t the same? Pretty boys tend to be charming and funny it’s what takes their good looks into godlike-drooling status.”

    You are a traditionalist and are thinking about the time when men were taught to be debonair, charming, sophisticated and suave and women were taught to have grace in addition to their beauty. Alas the modern society is more about instant gratification through manufactured looks instead of honing one’s skills and craft of seduction. Therefore, the very rare ones (male or female) who posses all those attributes become an instant icon of desire. The ones who don’t, become Brian Lochte. LOL!

  261. Wosie says:

    I love the fantasy of MFM, but not sure I will ever go through with it, but like I said, I’m 100% submissive so the right man could probably easily convince me. Current BF has zero interest in watching another man f**k me.

  262. Principium says:

    For me getting locked up and teased by Icy! Oh dear Lord, I should not have put that to vote. There is a cackle of hens I feel in here right now!

  263. DianaSBinOC says:

    @EllenSugarB-

    Welcome back!

    I think what disturbs me more is how many men actually have the daddy/daughter fantasy. Seriously what the hell is that saying about our society?

  264. Wosie says:

    Wait. What are we voting for or against?

  265. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Principium

    “I’d place good money on the probability that Miss Diana (as the merchant of pain) is most def into MMF, but I’d wager on MFM for the rest of the hens on here”

    Who me? I’m such a sweet darling. Hehehee. MFM and MMF are fine:) I have yet to try these out but the fantasy replays constantly:)

  266. EllenSugarB says:

    Hi there! I took a little hiatus from the blog and stopped by to say hello. Lots of new bloggers (or old bloggers with new identities)

    Just curious…have any of you SBs got the e-mail from the poser SD who has self appointed them self as “Pretty Boy Cuckold”??? This freak sends out a two page long e-mail which explicitly describes his fantasy encounter. I still can’t decide which scenario, or freak, is more disgusting – this guy or the pervert with the daddy/daughter fantasy. Barf.

  267. Principium says:

    We’ll take vote on that one!

    All those in favor say Aye. Voting closes at 12 AM PDT, 5/16/2013.

  268. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Principium-

    “Regarding pretty boys vs charming & funny:”

    Is there a reason why these aren’t the same? Pretty boys tend to be charming and funny it’s what takes their good looks into godlike-drooling status.

    Wow I fall asleep and miss a blog full of goodies

    “Any of you girls ever experienced a guy who had a dry orgasm? ”

    Not quite but I did have a boyfriend that would circulate the energy of his orgasms to make them that much stronger. I’m talking about to the point of almost blacking out. Have to love a man that has gotten through Carlos Castaneda books:) I still can’t get past the third chapter.

    I personally enjoy “stacking” so to speak. I still need to catch my breathe but sometimes I keep going. There have been some crazy sessions and oxytocin overload. I think one or two is best in sugar. More than that? eeks I may move in and demand a ring!

    @RDamien
    “Jersey if the girl really wanted to try it I’d consider it. I’d just need to lay down some ground rules hah..”

    And where do you live again? lol

    “Dine at the Y is easy to over think. It only gets tricky for me when I try and stack orgasms for the girl and I’m still figuring her out.”

    Funny I actually had to look up “Dine at the Y”–got it!

    and what is “BBBJTCNQNS”??

    Someone has to provide some definitions here.

  269. SugarySpicey says:

    Princi – are you wanting to be locked up and teased? 😉

  270. Principium says:

    You say cuckHold and I say cuckold! I need to research this and get back to you privately through the secure channel!

  271. SugarySpicey says:

    Princi – extreme cuckholds like to be locked up and unused while their women are out whoring around, then coming home to make them clean up the mess.

  272. Principium says:

    Are you sure that you are using the word “cuckhold” correctly? I mean, I am no writer but I seem to think of a “cuckold” in an entirely different context. So if it is a Cuckold indeed, then wouldn’t the cage be for the purpose of the imprisonment of the cuckolding party, i.e, the woman who cuckolds her husband? Hmmm!

  273. lil_tm says:

    “Multiple orgasms through penile penetration is…WOW!!!”

    For me NOTHIN’ compares to the O face that comes about due to simultaneous internal and external stimulation. And if it’s the penis that brings it on, you have yourself a finacee! lol

  274. SugarySpicey says:

    Dear, Sir CP – you are finding yourself in literature, as the reader is want to do, there is no active internal dialogue when I write, attributing words to people. They’re just words to meet a meter. Do you take offense to the cuckhold’s cage? kisses to your wounded feelings. 😉

  275. Principium says:

    @ Joysie: So what are you saying? We stick with the LJBF plan or throw in the occasional LJBF/WB? 😉

    @ iCySpIcEy: Fcuk me! My DNA is spread all over that crime scene! I feel like I’ve been cutto pieces and may need a well qualified CSI team to piece together the evidence of my existence. BTW, it is BBBJTCNQNS if you will 😉

  276. Jersey Darling says:

    @Principium – I’m actually less generous with oral after getting off. It’s best when I’m very turned on!

    Also, I’m a fan of multiples. On my own, I almost always go for two or three in a row. With a guy though it’s usually so much effort for them to get me once that I just want to relax after… Or I take care of the second one myself 😉

    @Rdamien – I’m so curious where in NJ you are! But I suppose that’s a conversation best had off blog.

  277. Principium says:

    Oh really? I’m so honored! I must have been drunk texting, er, sexting.

  278. SugarySpicey says:

    … and, CP, only the dirty stuff in that there blog poem was for you 😉

  279. SugarySpicey says:

    Cunny – I used to date a guy who did it on purpose. He’d push on a spot on his scrod. Can’t say I cared one way or the other, I was 19 and far too focused on myself.

  280. London Girl says:

    Way too much information oh fundamental one!

  281. Principium says:

    Any of you girls ever experienced a guy who had a dry orgasm? If so, what Ya think? Personally, it would freak the heck outta me if it heaved and not a drop came out! I’ve been known to put out small fires. I’m bad. Haha…

  282. London Girl says:

    Many words of wisdom are spoken in Wimbledon…

  283. Principium says:

    You speak very Wimbledonish!

  284. Wosie says:

    Totally with my girls Spicey & LG, after one…I’m way too sensitive and somewhat ticklish. But this applies only to oral. Multiple orgasms through penile penetration is…WOW!!!

  285. London Girl says:

    I prefer my players to focus on their game match by match, if you’re constantly thinking about the tournament then you’re not focusing on the hand you’re currently playing with…!

  286. Principium says:

    LoLo: hate on the game not the player 😉

  287. London Girl says:

    @Principium, that’s the problem, you’re always looking ahead instead of focusing on what you’re doing right now!

  288. Principium says:

    Hey Home Gurl, ’cause here in the US of A we stack and super stack. Then if we feel that we still haven’t stacked enough, we may even hyper stack.

  289. SugarySpicey says:

    Cunny, I agree with your approach completely, want to test stacking vs. your approach and I’ll blog my findings. 😉

  290. London Girl says:

    Lord why not just say multiple orgasms! You had to get fancy with the “stacking” chat.

    Spicey, I’m with you, I’m far too sensitive after just one to have anyone or anything near me. I need recovery time. I think the multiple orgasms trick is just an ego trip for men…

  291. SugarySpicey says:

    LG – keep licking after you get off, and launch orgasm after orgasm. I find it irritating.

  292. Principium says:

    @ LoLo:

    “Stacking orgasms refers a method for causing what is commonly referred to as “Multiple Orgasms” which involves bringing a woman as close to orgasm as possible so that her body “stores” that orgasmic energy – do this multiple times so that when she finally does have an orgasm she’s releasing the energy of five (or more) orgasms simultaneously. Women are capable of having several different types of orgasms including but not limited to vaginal; clitoral; fully body; anal; G-spot; combined & psycholagnic. What’s normally refered to as “multiple orgasms” usually combines psycholagnic with any of the other types.”

  293. London Girl says:

    WTF is stacking orgasms???

  294. Principium says:

    I agree with IcYsPiCeY on the no-stacking thang! It’s a very young girl’s game when they haven’t had too many quality sexual experiences other than being jack hammered by a teenager or a low 20’s turbo pecker.

    A real c*cksman shan’t do such things! Sacrilegious! Use that state ofOxytocin bliss to your advantage to make out passionately (just for a wee bit) and then guide your c*ck in her mouth so that she feel like devouring you. I have found more experienced to be a lot more generous with fellatio once they have had their clitoral vibrations and this Entr’acte serves as a mini break for the next round of vaginal play variety 😉

    Is it getting hot in here?!

  295. Wosie says:

    Would adding a vag-cam be too much? Lol, like a helmet-cam?

  296. SugarySpicey says:

    Dorky – add a headlamp!

  297. SugarySpicey says:

    Don’t stack orgasms! I hate that! … well it’s still orgasms, so I don’t actually hate that. But, it makes me feel like a lollipop – too ticklish too. Give me a second to catch my breath, enjoy some other playtime, and then go back for more.

  298. DorkyGuy says:

    lol, a while back, I proposed a new invention… if someone wants to manufacture it, I want royalties. It’s called the snorkelingus. (snorkel + cunnilingus.. see what I did there?)

    Spicey inspired me with a new idea… The device could have a helmet, so that it protects your skull from being crushed in case the girl clamps down with her thighs.

    @Wosey~ couldn’t agree more! The last 10 minutes of the movie were so beautiful that I have asked my kids to watch it, because it inspired some of my own plans.

    @Tina~ never been a Clooney fan, but he’s growing on me! He’s almost qualified for the short list of men I would consider for MFM. So far, it just has Sean Connery, Harrison Ford, and Fat Bastard (the movie character).

  299. RDamien says:

    Jersey if the girl really wanted to try it I’d consider it. I’d just need to lay down some ground rules hah..

    Dine at the Y is easy to over think. It only gets tricky for me when I try and stack orgasms for the girl and I’m still figuring her out.

  300. Jersey Darling says:

    I tend to think if a guy wants a third girl involved for a threesome, he should be open to a third guy as well. Fair is fair right?

  301. SugarySpicey says:

    Cunny, though I find myself quite evolved, I ain’t dining on anyone’s O!

  302. Principium says:

    You find dining at the Y super tricky? Try dining at the O instead! You may find it super Icky! (plus other rhyming adjectives) 😛

  303. SugarySpicey says:

    Don’t worry Cunny, they don’t head south after May when things heat up. We’ll be the only ones heading south. 😉

    One last note on 3somes, I give you men credit, dining at the Y is super tricky! I wanted a headlamp and a vice grip so that I could figure out what I was doing.

  304. Wosie says:

    Thanks Principal & Spicey! Might surprise the BF with a 3some one weekend. We have a phenomenal sex life, but I don’t mind spicing things up occasionally!

  305. Principium says:

    @ Icy Pricey: If Mom & dad’s bedroom overlooks the golf course, that’s where you shall be ravaged! We can send them to Cafe Rio instead 😀

  306. Principium says:

    @ Rosie (LOL)

    That is why best not to do this with a close friend! Otherwise what Icy said with regards to a random hookup. It’d be really cool if the 2nd F was real fun so to allow her to stay and enjoy the lavish room service spread to be ordered at 3 AM. The look on the face of the room service person would be priceless and a great tip would ice the Kodak moment 😉

  307. Wosie says:

    Totally lol’d at “hog the cock”…omg! I love this blog.

  308. SugarySpicey says:

    Wosie – depends on the girl. With the right chemistry it becomes a total girl party and everyone is laughing and playing and chatting after. With the wrong girl you can’t Speedy Gonzalez that bitch out of the room fast enough. Right or wrong is usually defined by how well everybody shares and makes sure nobody hogs the cock.

  309. SugarySpicey says:

    Cunny :( not sexy to tell a girl to meet halfway, though I spend quite a bit of time at my parent’s golf house in SGU. If you happened to be there sometime when I was, I would be willing to meet you at Cafe Rio.

  310. Wosie says:

    Meeting over! Yes, success!! Now 2 hours of free time before next meeting. Oh and look at where I find myself: the SA blog! What’s wrong with me? Don’t answer that… 😉

    RE: FFM/FMF

    I’m probably putting too much brain into this, but I always wondered what happens when sexy time is over and are “satisfied”? Does the 2nd F get up and leave? Do you make small talk? Anyone with experience want to share? I’m just bi-curious enough that I’d love to try…but never having done it makes me nervous. I’m completely, 100% submissive in every sense of the word so 2nd F would have to be in control. I take orders well! 😉

  311. RDamien says:

    For a threesome everyone needs to be cool with at least touching and kissing everyone involved in my mind so MFF for me.

    Multiple M’s also poses the possibility of collateral damage from another dudes release and thats a deal breaker.

  312. Principium says:

    @ Icy: meet me half way? St. George? 😉

  313. Principium says:

    Changing the pace from MMF& MFM to MFF & FMF:

    I think I’m the MFF type, if I got this in the right order, meaning I need not literally need be into the second F and I want my F to pick and choose the second F (preferably not a close friend) I will be more than willing to fool around with the 2nd F as a part & parcel of the erotic experience, but I would not be set on having intercourse with her. Not saying that it won’t happen (I’m a Ho) but the thought of going into that set of what I think is FMF, is not too titillating for my Limbic 😉

  314. Tina says:

    Re MFM/MMF/whatever threesomes: the man I’m with an I have considered a threesome with another woman, but NEVER another man. His thought? His penis is the only one allowed in the room, especially naked. My thought? While I’m perfectly fine with the thought of gay men being together and finding happiness. I’m not open enough to be ok with 2 men naked together around me. Even if they don’t touch one another, it’s just not ok with me. I prefer to have 1 man around that gets my full attention. :)

  315. SugarySpicey says:

    Cunny – then I guess we’ll have to deal with this in person. 😉

  316. Tina says:

    @Beachy: what’s shakin’ girlie? :)

  317. Tina says:

    @Dorky: I loved Clooney in O Brother Where Art Thou. One of these days I’m going to see it as stage!! I’m actually thinking of saving up for season tix to the Broadway Across America season at the Majestic in San Antonio. Although the theater here in Austin is ok, my parent’s have raved about the Majestic in SA. Plus, it’s not a far drive from me. It’s something I’m still pondering, since it’s quite the investment for my income at this time.

    As far as Game of Thrones, I prefer reading the books. I can see the characters the way that I want to, and go as fast as the writer publishes. I’m still waiting to nab book 5 (Flight of Dragons). I had to take a break after book 4, since it just made me mad. I SO didn’t like Georgie-poo after THAT one :(

  318. Principium says:

    @ GoT aficionados: skip the upcoming eppy # 9 in a few weeks, ’cause you gonna hate George RR Martin! LOL

  319. Principium says:

    @ Joysie: Be a good girl and you may get HBO for XMas 😛

    @ Icy: Sorry but Mom checks my sexts 😛

  320. SugarySpicey says:

    Sorry Cunny – your device isn’t compatible with my portal. Guess we’ll have to handle things the old fashioned way, my Hitachi and your dirty sexts. 😉

  321. Jersey Darling says:

    I’ve never really liked the term pot. Feel like I’m supposed to be putting a flower in it. When I’m not lazy I prefer writing out potential SD/SB.

    Game of Thrones – I haven’t watched any of this season yet! Also behind on Mad Men… :(

  322. Principium says:

    Can we use a PS3 instead so I can watch it in 1080P HD?

  323. SugarySpicey says:

    RDD – Pots = Potentials

    Cunny – Check out the WiiMojo, you could quiver my sliver via Skype using your WiiMote 😉

  324. RDamien says:

    I like this group. I’m sure this will seem obvious once someone tells me but what is “pots” shorthand for in this context?

    Diana I think you’ve got the right idea about what he wants: A way around. Just my take. Now if it was a transition into a relationship I could see that. The open NSA is a big distinction.

    I’m almost caught up on Game of Thrones!

  325. Principium says:

    @ Icy Pricey: since SLC is over 800 miles away from my current coordinates, can we just do this via text or Google voice? Consider it as a quick fix for now 😉

    On the good news front, the geeks @ R&D are working on a sex drone prototype. FBSD has volunteered as remote pilot for the maiden flight. Oh I wonder as to whom he will spurt onto first? Haha!

  326. SugarySpicey says:

    MFM? That my dears is too much dick for this chick!

    * Hide, they’re coming at me from all angles. I’m surrounded!

  327. Principium says:

    Voltaire was truly ahead of his time and quite possibly an OSD (in the spirit of calling someone an OG)

    I’d place good money on the probability that Miss Diana (as the merchant of pain) is most def into MMF, but I’d wager on MFM for the rest of the hens on here 😉

  328. SugarySpicey says:

    “Although I may not agree with what you say, I will fight to the death for your right to say it.” Since we are quoting Voltaire and all, thought that phrase appropriate for the blog.

    Things didn’t work with the SD who made my kitten smitten, at least there was no exchange of fluids first. Rather disappointed. Capitol P, will you lick my … wounds?

  329. Wosie says:

    Lol, Dorky! Shows how much I actually know about that sexual category. I didn’t think it mattered which order you placed the acronym, just that there were 2 Ms and 1 F. If it does, in fact matter, I meant MFM! Woopsie! 😳

  330. DorkyGuy says:

    MMF or MFM? Transposing two letters can make a world of difference. Dyslexic people might want to ask someone else to write their adult personal ads, to avoid surprises.

  331. Wosie says:

    @lil_tm

    I hear ya! I think all of us in a room together would make for one interesting night, indeed! Think of all the topics we’d cover in a few hours over cocktails and no one could be “judgey” about anything, right?! 😉

    @DorkyGuy

    I loved, loved, LOVED The Descendants. Even while Clooney playing a more disheveled man than he normally does – he was still hot. But the story is what got me. It’s one of the movies that I sat in the theaters and cried.

    @Principium

    Do you think when Voltaire said, “It is dangerous to be right in matters where established men are wrong”, by established men, he meant sugar daddies? 😉

    Off to an early morning meeting. Have a sweet, sweet day, sugars!

  332. Principium says:

    Regarding pretty boys vs charming & funny:

    “Give me 5 minutes to talk away my ugly face, and I can bed the Queen of France”… Voltaire.

    Ref crossing swords & MMF:

    “As a habitual post coitus cuddlier I prefer that my left side option to be just as inviting as my right side option” The middleman!

  333. DorkyGuy says:

    Speaking of George Clooney, I watched The Descendants last night. Absolutely a terrific movie. Highly recommended.

  334. lil_tm says:

    “Lil_One: I thought you might enjoy some great Bluegrass style music from the Civil Wars”

    Well since I live around dem durr “hillbillys” ;”

    @Diana-I was wondering what all the stuff below the head was. Thought it was a guy with his arms wrapped around your neck LOL

    @Wosie-I don’t blame you for not wanting to get personal with people regarding sugar. It’s kind of like the friendship you don’t want to spoil with sex, but I also think it would be fun to hang out with some of you.

    @London Girl-Well I do declare! *sashays away* 😉

  335. Jersey Darling says:

    Late night last night here on the blog!

  336. Wosie says:

    Must really catch some Zzzzzzzzz’s now. This blog is so addicting! Good night, lovers!

  337. Wosie says:

    “Why is it that no one is offered a threesome with 2 guys? Seriously? That would be so hot!” -DianaSB

    Lol! I’m laughing because I’m curious how our beloved blog SDs will react to that. Any guy I’ve dated and brought that scenario up with pretty much gave the same response in a round about way, “Sorry. But my d*ck is not touching another man’s d*ck!” Can’t say I’d actually want to go through with it, but I love to watch MMF when I’m in the mood for some naughty porn.

    Oh, keep us posted on your situation with the pot SD, turned open relationship! I’m curious to know what he ends up telling you.

  338. DianaSBinOC says:

    @ Wosie: I think Diana is already claiming 20% of Spicey’s sugar proceeds from me since she’s “agenting” Spice Gurl so hard. I can send you 18% gratituties via PayPal if you wish to partake in repping SG?

    What are you talking about? This is pro boner work!! Err I mean pro bono. ^_^

    For the good of the realm and all! Speaking of which I need to catch up on Game of Thrones. Missed last Sunday’s episode.. :(

  339. DianaSBinOC says:

    “Re threesome, not my thing either but I am 5″10, nice rack and a British accent! Do you also get to pick a fantasy male 3rd?”

    Why is it that no one is offered a threesome with 2 guys? Seriously? That would be so hot!

  340. Wosie says:

    Yes! Funny is oh so sexxxxy!!

  341. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Rosie-
    “One of my latest pot SDs has discussed a desire to start a sugar arrangement with the desire to go into a regular open relationship.” -DianaSB

    “I would be curious to know what he thinks the differences between the two are. Open relationship seems like NSA without the sugar to me. I could be wrong though. Isn’t the arrangement already an open relationship, sort of?”

    That’s exactly what I thought. I said pretty much those very same words in my response to him. Sugar is pretty much NSA anyways so if he desires dating other SBs I wouldn’t have an issue with that. To me the allowance aspect of the arrangement is what keeps things in perspective. NSA without the allowance doesn’t serve a purpose imho.If it was something I wanted I would be spending my time going to bars taking a different guy home nightly.

    There aren’t enough “benefits” to that arrangement which is why so few women sign up for that deal.

    Any who we’ll see. He has yet to respond so I’m thinking either he really is busy or he’s trying to figure a way around “sugar”.

  342. London Girl says:

    Re nerdy, smart men. Me too! A sense of humour is essential, I’m definitely a girl who can be laughed into bed.

    I don’t care how dropdead gorgeous a guy is or how sculpted the abs etc, if he can’t hold a conversation, debate a subject or make a wisecrack then it doesn’t work for me. Ideally of course he would be able to do all of the above and be dropdead gorgeous, but I believe there is only one George Clooney!

  343. Wosie says:

    @London Girl

    You’re probably right. Fatty is probably a gorgeous Silver Fox. Works out every single day and has a full head of hair. Even if he didn’t, I also love his sense of humor.

    My fantasy male (lookswise ONLY and in no particular order) would be: Bradley Cooper, David Beckham, Christian Bale and Daniel Craig. But I’m a total sucker for nerdy, smart men and they tend to win me over above and beyond the hunky men.

  344. London Girl says:

    @Wosie, I suspect Fatty is actually rather gorgeous, and I lurve his sense of humour!

    Re threesome, not my thing either but I am 5″10, nice rack and a British accent! Do you also get to pick a fantasy male 3rd?

  345. Wosie says:

    Good night Sugar World! Zzzzzzzz

  346. Rosie says:

    “Wosie, I have a girl crush on you too and Jersey…
    Boys; Dorky, SDinLA and FatBastard (even though he dumped me),Principium would be in there but he ho’s himself out too much ;-)” -London Girl

    Didn’t you say you’re 5’10”? So am I! If I were into girls, you’d be my perfect height! I love tall girls. I always tell my BF if we ever had a threesome (which we aren’t into, but talk about), I’d want a tall, drop dead gorgeous girl with a nice rack…and a British accent. Lol. 😉

    I would probably break my ‘no meeting anyone from the blog rule’ for Fatty. His blog personality reminds me of one of my past SDs that I’m still friends with. He’s awesome. If you don’t know him, you think he’s a total a prick, but he is one of the sweetest, most intelligent, funniest, wittiest men I’ve ever known. But he calls people out on their B.S. and gives them a mouth spanking in such a way that they walk away thanking him. And he’s a tiny bit on the heavier side. Another reason Fatty reminds me of him. More of him to love. Lol.

    PS: Officially changing my name to Wosie in next post so I might be moderated for a full day.

  347. Principium says:

    Yeah, you must be MBA from the bid-nezz school of brass knuckles! Haha! Nite everyone Zzzzz

  348. London Girl says:

    @Principium, they are more identifiable by the “model” description on the doorway these days. Marketing/ho’ing = same/same!

  349. Principium says:

    I prefer to think that I’m “marketing” myself but you three girls now make me feel like a tramp from Soho (I actually recall the days when the prostitutes had their red lights on in old Soho, ala Sting and the famous song Roxanne!)

  350. Rosie says:

    “@ Wosie: I think Diana is already claiming 20% of Spicey’s sugar proceeds from me since she’s “agenting” Spice Gurl so hard. I can send you 18% gratituties via PayPal if you wish to partake in repping SG? ;)” -Principium

    If you will send me 50% of the 18% as a non-refundable fee immediately, it’s a deal! Hey, I’m a Bid-nezz woman after all.

    (I’m also a serial poster tonight. Geezy Louisy! Working so many hours these days is getting in the way of my blog fun! 😉 )

  351. London Girl says:

    So good I said it twice!

  352. London Girl says:

    @lil_tm, me have a crush on you too! Your southern accent, brings out my inner Scarlett O’Hara!!!

    Rhett Butler must be the sexiest man in fiction and a true prototype SD to boot…

    Wosie, I have a girl crush on you too and Jersey…

    Boys; Dorky, SDinLA and FatBastard (even though he dumped me), Principium would be in there but he ho’s himself out too much 😉

  353. London Girl says:

    @lil_tm, me have a crush on you too! Especially your southern accent, brings out my inner Scarlett O’Hara!!!

    Rhett Butler must be the sexiest man in fiction and a true prototype SD to boot…

    Wosie, I have a girl crush on you too and Jersey…

    Boys; Dorky, SDinLA and FatBastard (even though he dumped me), Principium would be in there but he ho’s himself out too much 😉

  354. SugarMeSpicey says:

    WTF – What am I left with? Just a weekend of hot sex, and some LuLu? Pssshhhaaawww!

  355. Principium says:

    @ Wosie: I think Diana is already claiming 20% of Spicey’s sugar proceeds from me since she’s “agenting” Spice Gurl so hard. I can send you 18% gratituties via PayPal if you wish to partake in repping SG? 😉

  356. Rosie says:

    Hey SDinLA, if you’re lurking – did you see Barbara Wawa’s retirement announcement? 83 years old! Gotta love that woman.

  357. SugarySpicey says:

    There will be no humping of the Beckster. He’s afraid of me.

  358. Rosie says:

    “Thanks Noob SD! I’ve never met any blog SDs, but I have a feeling I may be meeting one soon enough” -Spicey

    Please tell us it’s Principium (yes, I’ll chime in and agree with the others that there is sexual tension of colossal proportions between you two) and not the BECKSTER! I noticed (s)he posts on your blog.

  359. Rosie says:

    “One of my latest pot SDs has discussed a desire to start a sugar arrangement with the desire to go into a regular open relationship.” -DianaSB

    I would be curious to know what he thinks the differences between the two are. Open relationship seems like NSA without the sugar to me. I could be wrong though. Isn’t the arrangement already an open relationship, sort of?

  360. Rosie says:

    Since I like my anonymity, Princi, I’ll just have to show up at Runyon and hope you’re in bright mango pants…and shirtless. 😉

  361. Rosie says:

    “Yesterday, I accidentally drank food coloring. The doctor says I’m ok, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.” -Dorky

    Lol! I love dorky guys. Talk nerdy to me! Congrats on becoming a GILF, Dorkster!

  362. Principium says:

    I’ll sport mango depending on what 50 shade on brown my tan may be. Now don’t you leg hump some random mango, till I confirm the coordinates with you first!

  363. Rosie says:

    I’d know Channing Tatum’s armpit hair in the dark. 😉

  364. Principium says:

    Dammit! I was also thinking Channing Tatum at first, but went with Marcus Schenkenberg instead!

  365. Rosie says:

    “But we still gonna leg hump up @ Runyon Canyon Girl (in our matching LuLus) 😉 ” -Principium

    Lol! It would be quite funny to see you in the mango colored Wunder Pant by LLL, which was my latest purchase. Might be a bit too girly for you, P! Then again, you do strike me as being very metrosexual so you could get away with it, I’m sure. 😉

  366. Principium says:

    But we still gonna leg hump up @ Runyon Canyon Girl (in our matching LuLus) 😉

  367. Rosie says:

    So now we know DianaSB is really Channing Tatum? Lol!!

  368. Rosie says:

    “I have a soft spot for Wosie and London Girl and Diana as far as femmes go.” -lil_tm

    Awww, I’m blushing. Must admit, I girl crushed on you after your Aaron Neville mole reference (it made me lol for real!), followed by your Sweet Brown quote. Love me a funny, smart girl from the south! ‘Ya heard?! 😉

    Re: SA meet-ups

    I know when I used to follow (read:lurk) the blog years ago, the SDs and SBs used to discuss getting together in random cities. Seemed like fun, but I think it would just be too close for comfort for me. I come here because I can talk about my sugar past very openly and honestly – with other men and women who have chosen the arrangement lifestyle. It’s been one of those areas of my life that I have only shared with one friend ever and only because I knew she wouldn’t be “judgey”. Just happened one night after she broke down and shared some personal stuff with me about her loser boyfriend living with her for 2 years (without paying rent) and after her tears dried, she said, “why can’t I get lucky and find the kind of men like you’ve dated?” So, in a moment of girl power weakness and wine-induced sympathy, I let out my secret and told her about SA. She’s one of those girls who will take a pinky swear to her grave too. (Oh, hi, “A”! I know she reads the blog sometimes…)

    I know some people on the blog don’t mind people knowing about this lifestyle (Spicey has been very open about it…I mean, she can just say it’s research for her erotica novels) and I think DianaSB (or London Girl, I can’t remember which one so my apologies if I’m completely messing this up) also shares openly that she’s in the Sugar Bowl and doesn’t hide it. Due to my career and the business people I engage with, it just wouldn’t be a good idea for me to share this part about my past. I’m not ashamed of it, but unfortunately, people would judge me and I never want anyone to say I made it to where I am in business because I’m an attractive woman and a man paid my way. I want them to take me seriously for my intelligence and hard work. Sure, my past SDs helped me with personal expenses, seed funding and made life easier so I could get ahead, but I built and grew my business mostly on my own and still put all my blood, sweat and tears into it daily.

    That was a really long way to say, I wouldn’t be interested in the SA meet-ups. Doesn’t mean I don’t adore you all though! :-)

  369. Principium says:

    @ Diana: “Now since you’ve been sugar free for a while you should be able to afford the allowance of Nicey Spicey.”

    Wait! I detect a bit of Diana “dig” in there. Splain yourself girl!

    Also, the dude in your Gravatar has a hairy armpit, but otherwise, yeah, TMI. Haha!

  370. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Principium

    “I was kinda wondering why you had a bushy armpit Diana, but I thought that it was the inn thang these days ”

    Armpits no. But down yonder? Yes:)

    Wow TMI lol

  371. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Principium-
    “I luv how you try to pimp me out to The Nicey, Pricey, Spicey… ”

    You two have great chemistry. Remember she stimulates your limbic system even a blind man can see. Now since you’ve been sugar free for a while you should be able to afford the allowance of Nicey Spicey.

    Plus I can’t actually pimp you out since you do a great job as an independent blog Wh***. Heee:)

  372. Principium says:

    I was kinda wondering why you had a bushy armpit Diana, but I thought that it was the inn thang these days 😀

  373. DianaSBinOC says:

    Hahah you like?? I uploaded a smexy picture of my favorite male stripper ahah!

  374. DianaSBinOC says:

    @lil_tm

    “My first thought is that it is a dating ploy. He is being smart, actually. He’s letting the girl believe that there is always a possibility for more. Maybe he knows women don’t want to feel cheap and that is why he is saying this.”

    I wondered this as well. Usually in regular dating no one really comes out and says “hey I want to screw around “. It’s generally left up to interpretation until the woman does that awful ” where is this going?” typically after months of wild sex. lol

    “My other thought is only because I’m personally going through something and can relate.
    I worry sometimes that I like my freedom too much. And I wonder if being in an open relationship might be a better option than a “normal” relationship.”

    “It’s not because I want to sleep around–I would never sleep with more than one man at a time- but because I don’t like being tied down and conforming for the wrong reasons.”

    I was the same in the last relationship. I didn’t want to be tied down into it but I think mainly it was because I felt the person was fun but not worth that deep commitment. I don’t sleep around either. It seems way too difficult for me to manage emotions and conversations with multiple people. I did date a few guys when I was 19 but it was all dating. Still I was always making really bad mistakes like : ” ohh that joke you made the other night was hilarious”. Of course he goes ” I never said that”. Oops.

    “You’ll have to get to know him to find out his particular reason, but that’s just some perspective from my POV.”

    You’re right. I”m currently awaiting a response on the topic from him. I mean I totally get the ” I want to sleep around without cheating” aspect. Just why be in a relationship? I somewhat feel it’s “guaranteed sex partner” but I don’t want to jump to conclusions. We’ll see what happens and thank you for sharing your thoughts:)

  375. SugarySpicey says:

    I’m too ferocious for your Capitol?

  376. Principium says:

    Lil_One: I thought you might enjoy some great Bluegrass style music from the Civil Wars 😉

  377. lil_tm says:

    Diana-you have nice bone structure. 😉

  378. lil_tm says:

    Princey-that girl has a beautiful voice and that guy look exactly like JD.

    They make singing look so effortless.

  379. Principium says:

    Just a random OT, but I must post this cover of Billy Jean by the now disbanded Civil Wars (booo!) Very different to the great MJ’s original version, but way cool:

    [img]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=441mR2zsQbg[/img]

    P.S. When did Johnny Depp become a singer? LOL!

  380. lil_tm says:

    “^^^ I’m just Fcuking with Ya ^^^”

    It’s all good in the hood. 😉

  381. DianaSBinOC says:

    Ok so I’m testing it out. Hmm

  382. lil_tm says:

    “One of my latest pot SDs has discussed a desire to start a sugar arrangement with the desire to go into a regular open relationship. What I’m curious to understand are the pros and cons to an open relationship. I would think since sugar is involved that the idea of an open arrangement isn’t an issue. What is probably throwing me off a bit is why would someone desire and open relationship when they can very well stay single. Also once things move from sugar status to regular relationship (open), would this then mean no sugar or less? I think I’m also trying to figure out if the pot SD is looking to move things from mutually beneficial to one sided (his).”

    My first thought is that it is a dating ploy. He is being smart, actually. He’s letting the girl believe that there is always a possibility for more. Maybe he knows women don’t want to feel cheap and that is why he is saying this.

    My other thought is only because I’m personally going through something and can relate.
    I worry sometimes that I like my freedom too much. And I wonder if being in an open relationship might be a better option than a “normal” relationship.
    It’s not because I want to sleep around–I would never sleep with more than one man at a time- but because I don’t like being tied down and conforming for the wrong reasons.

    You’ll have to get to know him to find out his particular reason, but that’s just some perspective from my POV.

  383. Principium says:

    ^^^ I’m just Fcuking with Ya ^^^

  384. lil_tm says:

    “My BIG FIVE-O is just around the corner, and therefore I must self DQ with U (age limit 40) & Lil_One (age limit 17)”

    LOL!
    I have no age limit and fiddy is not old.
    I guess what I meant, because I probably seemed shallow, is that it’s nice to see SDs that are fit and take care of themselves and are in the younger age bracket as opposed to Papi and the other emails that turn my stomach because it would feel like dating my grandfather.

    There is no age limit for male or female as far as attractiveness goes. (think Sean Connery and Diane Lane)
    :)

  385. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Spicey

    “Diana, go to Gravatar.com and use the same email address you’ve used here, it will automatically appear once you upload a photo.”

    Thank you Spicey . on my way there now——-.>

  386. DianaSBinOC says:

    I have a question for the blog babies and daddies.

    One of my latest pot SDs has discussed a desire to start a sugar arrangement with the desire to go into a regular open relationship. What I’m curious to understand are the pros and cons to an open relationship. I would think since sugar is involved that the idea of an open arrangement isn’t an issue. What is probably throwing me off a bit is why would someone desire and open relationship when they can very well stay single. Also once things move from sugar status to regular relationship (open), would this then mean no sugar or less? I think I’m also trying to figure out if the pot SD is looking to move things from mutually beneficial to one sided (his).

    Nothing has happened yet, we’re just talking about the possibilities if we do decide to start an arrangement.

    Thoughts?

  387. Principium says:

    @ DianaSB: Only professionally painted portraits are accepted. You must email me one and I’ll put it up for you 😛

    I luv how you try to pimp me out to The Nicey, Pricey, Spicey… But, I may not be able to match her ferocious libido and insatiable appetite for devouring &@#* My BIG FIVE-O is just around the corner, and therefore I must self DQ with U (age limit 40) & Lil_One (age limit 17) ;P

  388. lil_tm says:

    “I don’t know if this topic is kosher – Just out of curiosity have any of the SBs that post here met up with an SD that posts here – or vice versa? (not SB/SB, but SB/SD)”

    I have not, but I haven’t been around very long. I always wondered about those SA gatherings in a certain city and how those are.

    I would love to hang out, but it feels like blog members are more like brother and sisters than love interests..but maybe that’s just me.
    I have a soft spot for Wosie and London Girl and Diana as far as femmes go.
    They’re just my type of girls and I’m sure it would be a blast to hang out with them. :)

  389. SugarySpicey says:

    Diana, go to Gravatar.com and use the same email address you’ve used here, it will automatically appear once you upload a photo.

  390. DianaSBinOC says:

    How exactly do you put up a picture here? I often wondered is it something you add to your email profile or do you have to add a code in your comment?

  391. DianaSBinOC says:

    @NoobSd
    -Just out of curiosity have any of the SBs that post here met up with an SD that posts here – or vice versa? (not SB/SB, but SB/SD)

    I did hear of a SB/SD blog party get together. I always wonder what happened.
    Fly on the wall thoughts swim through my mind.

    I’m still wishing for Spicey and Principium to get together:) Ohh what a sexy blog entry that will be!!

    “Hmm. RDamien..nice view from the back.”

    Yes yes yes!! I’m already blog crushing. :)

  392. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars!!!

    Dorky~ Hi, How are you?

    Tina~ Hi girl… 😀 how you been?

    Noob_SD~ I have met a few SDs and a few SBs from the blog 😀

  393. Jersey Darling says:

    @Noob_SD – Back in the day (before my time) there were blog get-togethers. There are some people who post here that I’d love to meet assuming they ever come to my area!

    Somebody here still owes me a pizza date!

  394. SugarySpicey says:

    Thanks Noob SD! I’ve never met any blog SDs, but I have a feeling I may be meeting one soon enough

  395. Thanks Noob SD! I’ve never met any blog SDs, but I have a feeling I may be meeting one soon enough 😉

  396. Noob_SD says:

    @sugarmytips – Awesome blog …

    I don’t know if this topic is kosher – Just out of curiosity have any of the SBs that post here met up with an SD that posts here – or vice versa? (not SB/SB, but SB/SD)

    Y’all are talking about towns that I visit not too infrequently.

  397. lil_tm says:

    “@lil_tm: un(?)fortunately”

    hmmm..you never know in the sugar world. 😉

  398. Tina says:

    If I can’t find a gold bikini, would running around in a white bed sheet with no undergarments suffice? The side buns is a given 😉

  399. Tina says:

    @Dorky: if you dress up as a wookie we have a deal! *purrrrrrr* What can I say – I like my men big and hairy (it’s actually practical – I’m always cold so a big hairy man is warm to snuggle with)

  400. DorkyGuy says:

    @Tina~ LOL! Yes, I can be bought with epics.

    Also, if a woman were to give me with a life-size replica of the Tardis, I might have to propose. If you can’t do the Tardis, a girl on a budget can get a lot of mileage from a gold bikini and side hair buns.

  401. Tina says:

    @lil_tm: un(?)fortunately my weekend is quite booked up, but have fun in Houston!

  402. Jersey Darling says:

    @Rdamien Wow, go figure! Sometimes the stars align 😛

  403. lil_tm says:

    “And Austin is a FABULOUS town”

    Well I won’t be there, but I’ll be in Houston this weekend if any of you sugarbaybays wanna hang out. 😀

    @RDamien…no probem…it’s nice to see SDs that aren’t silver foxes. 😉

  404. Tina says:

    Oh my, you have all forgotten that Dorky CAN be bought. You just have to have a shiny purple item from your latest quest and be able to nerd out at any given moment.

    (Sorry Dorkster, couldn’t resist giving away your kryptonite to the masses. And since you’ve apparently been taken on the blog, looks like I’m left with SDinLA. Where is my little shnookums anyway?) 😉

    @Esteban: FYI, there ARE women that don’t need her SD to have fancy material things. Arrangements are different for everyone, and you just have to take the time to find the one that suits you. And Austin is a FABULOUS town – keep it weird babe! :)

  405. SugarySpicey says:

    Don’t worry RDD – SoftiB will be mad that you’re cock blocking, and then we’ll have a cat fight, and kiss clits and tits and make up. You just gotta hang around for the show. Mrrraaarrrwww!

  406. RDamien says:

    I’m in a very good mood tonight too! On a Tuesday of all nights.

    My isnt everyone so very complimentary here, thanks lil_tm

  407. lil_tm says:

    We were having a discussion about behavior that really doesn’t have much to do with this kind of dating in particular, but with all kinds of dating.

    A guy I was chatting with from one of the regular sites disappeared into thin air and then just popped back up today, a few weeks later.
    Maybe he was emotionally involved with someone(Looking at your FattyB!) Really, who knows? But I see your point in that whatever the reason, it makes you not care to pursue it and makes the person seem flakey and not worth your time.
    So, I believe this kind of behavior comes with any kind of online dating, not just sugar.

    In the last few days, it’s come down to two front runners in the world of sugar dating. One has proven especially needy, so I’m going to stick with the strapping younger lad that seems like way more fun! Plus he claims to be dominant in bed(yay!), so we shall see. :)

  408. lil_tm says:

    Hmm. RDamien..nice view from the back.
    But Jersey claimed you first. I shall gracefully bow out.

  409. SugarySpicey says:

    Thanks RDD – tonight it’s all about humping music.

    Hmm, all this sexing music is putting me in the mood!!! Lol!

  410. RDamien says:

    SugarMeSpicey I just read your blog post and thank you! That confirmed a lot of my thoughts. I may have had the wrong mindset coming into this but I’m glad to be wrong.

  411. RDamien says:

    Jersey Darling, I even live in NJ! What more could you ask for?! Hah, thanks for saying that it made me smile.

  412. Principium says:

    @ London, yes I concur. Let’s put an ad in the Evening Standard (does that fish & chips wrap still exist?) in the lost & (too be) found section 😉

    Speaking of fish N chips, I loved having them at Brighton. Why Brighton? I don’t have the foggiest idea now!

  413. London Girl says:

    @Principium, only starting to feel violated? I must be losing my touch!

  414. Principium says:

    @ Nicey, Pricey, Spicey: show me yours and I’ll show you mine 😉

    @ London: I’m starting to feel violated 😀

  415. SugarySpicey says:

    Capitol P – Junk shot! Junk shot! Junk shot!

    Or hands, always fond of man hands, the better to pet me with.

  416. London Girl says:

    @Principium, think of yourself as nectar to make honey…

  417. Principium says:

    @ London: I feel dirty now! Like a delicate flower which got invaded by a bee 😛

  418. London Girl says:

    @Principium, I’m not that keen on the thought of you sitting on my shoulders, maybe it’s best if for the duration of our relationship you just lie back and let me do the sitting on top of?

  419. Principium says:

    @ Jersey: Go for it baby and remember the old adage that there’s no honor among thieves 😉

  420. Principium says:

    This attention seeking man ho here wants to update his Gravatar and is taking requests from the blog ladies.

    FBSD’s request will be worth 5 time more. I don’t do private part shots, but open to other semi-decent suggestions.

    Oh London, you are taller than me but I like for us to watch beautiful sunsets whilst sitting on top of your shoulders. I think that’ll be a Gravatar for the ages 😀

  421. London Girl says:

    @Spicey- “Riches beyond the dreams of avarice”

    Dorky can’t be bought, but he can be enticed…

  422. SugarySpicey says:

    *Elbows thrown, cheeks Vaselined, ready to scratch and fight. “Wait! Young, attractive, and kind of sweet?”

    Hmmmm, I may need to rethink my request, Dorky wont name his price anyway, he’s such a p*ssy tease!

  423. sweetie says:

    Jersey, RDamien said he was all that: rich, young, and good looking, not to mention in good shape. Mmmmm, good choice, Darling 😉

  424. London Girl says:

    Yep ladies, it’s all about ME! The problem I have with 3some’s and more’somes is that there is a slight albeit negligible possibility that it won’t all be about me and the universe might not turn around me… Clearly that is not an acceptable situation!

  425. Rosie says:

    Last I remember, London Girl said she would only share FatiB with ME if I threw in some extra groupons. See how fast girls turn on you? We can’t be trusted. 😉

  426. Jersey Darling says:

    Hum! Too many chicks in the barn, guess I’ll have to give up on Dorky. Looks like I’ll have to steal that new RDamien guy from his sb that he isn’t sure is genuine… 😉

  427. FatBastardSD says:

    Ladies, there is plenty of me to share!

  428. SugarySpicey says:

    It’s not the dog in the fight, it’s the fight in the dog! Unfortunately, I remember your willingness to share. I guess you can have a little Gilfyconsolation – so long as I get his sloppy seconds.

  429. London Girl says:

    Back off 5 foot nothing skinny Spicey, this 5″10 busty wench will fight you for him!

    FatBastard has dumped me, I need some consolation lovin’ from Dorky…!

  430. SugarySpicey says:

    Hands off London! You get SoftiB, I get Dorky Boo Boo, if he would only name his price!

  431. London Girl says:

    Congratulations Dorky! Does this make you a Gilf? 😉

  432. sweetie says:

    He emailed back with the pictures. No attraction, unfortunately. Still hunting :)

  433. Jersey Darling says:

    @Dorky Haha! This is why I love you.

  434. DorkyGuy says:

    @Jersey~ If you make exactly 20 people groan, is that a score? 😛

  435. Jersey Darling says:

    Hi Dorky!

    You’d be so proud of me. I made four very bad puns today, and one was so bad I made ~20 people groan at once.

  436. DorkyGuy says:

    Doing good! Brand new grandfather (for a second time this year), and that’s keeping me busy.

    I had a glance at the blog topic… I suppose it’s a bad day to be a female catholic Native American widow with a PhD in engineering. I’ll be watching for that SB profile. I bet it belongs to one of our blog ladies… ok, who wants to fess up?

  437. SugarySpicey says:

    Dorky!! Welcome back. Even if your joke is a little … dorky.

  438. DorkyGuy says:

    Yesterday, I accidentally drank food coloring. The doctor says I’m ok, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.

  439. Promo1 says:

    Really, here’s my take on the comments about these SD/SB relationships. It’s a dead end trail.I cant see any value in them, unless both parties truly care about eachother and bring something to the table beyond money or sex. What’s more, because you found each other on this kind of website, often with a substancial age difference, economic difference, attractiveness, life experience, you arent a good fit long term. So in the end, somebody gets screwed (literally and otherwise), and somebody gets deeply hurt. Its the battle of the sexes, 2013!

  440. SugarySpicey says:

    Jersey – I may have encountered that same gentleman. At the time I was naive to SA, and thought the demand was kind of hot! Didn’t do it (though I did get him too! Lol) but I still thought the particular way the man I encountered did it.

  441. lil_tm says:

    I’ve never blocked anyone. I just do the same I do IRL if I don’t want to talk to them. Ignore them.

  442. lil_tm says:

    “Lol @ lil_tim. I love Sweet Brown.”

    Look up bed intruder and Shirley Q Liquor. :)

  443. Jersey Darling says:

    Wow, I think I’ve only blocked one person the entire time I’ve been on SA (a very poor specimen – wanted a sub and out of curiosity I talked to him, and as soon as we moved the conversation off the site he demanded I get naked and strip on cam to prove my submissiveness – LOL). :roll:

  444. FatBastardSD says:

    @sweetie

    Instead of asking for the pictures again ask him why he won’t send them to you. The answer should tell you a lot.

    @DianaSBinOC

    “Is this a nice way of saying it’s a shame I didn’t get grouped , have a cock pushed up against me?”

    I don’t like cock myself but I think it’s fair to assume that you might not mind depending on whose cock it is.

  445. Rosie says:

    “Ain’t nobody got time for that.” Lol @ lil_tim. I love Sweet Brown.

  446. Rosie says:

    RE: “Being french kissed, having someone grab your boob and having someone rub their member on you without permission…”

    I agree with FatBastard that those are just bad human qualities and cannot be aligned specifically as being bad “SD actions”. In the past, I had a guy from match dot com walk me to my car after our first date and I knew I wasn’t feeling it so just went to hug him to thank him for dinner and in that moment, he swiftly tried to stick his slobbery tongue down my throat, while pressing his hard erection against my leg. I just politely shimmied out of his grip, got in my car and awkwardly called it a night. 😳

  447. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Fatty B

    “43 blocked profiles on SA? You do seem a bit tightly wound but 43 blocked profiles seems high. I was blocked by about 5 members. I deserved to be blocked by 1 SB for sure, but the others were just too sensitive.”

    Is this a nice way of saying it’s a shame I didn’t get grouped , have a cock pushed up against me?

    Yes once I realize I’m chatting with a fake I block.What’s the point in having him contacting me again with a new lame story? I’ve already had one guy contact me 4 times. The thing is he’s married so I complimented him on his pictures and told him why we wouldn’t be a match. In the last message he stated he’s now separated. A lie? Sure it is. Guy has been a few sites including Miss Travel for the last few years always with the words of ” I’m never leaving my wife”.

    Blocking isn’t silly when is serves the purpose of keeping what you don’t want out of your inbox.

    Speaking of which I should probably go check to see who else I need to keep from sending me another ridiculous message of “finer things in life” when what they really mean is oral sex in a Starbuck’s bathroom sans Sugar In the Raw packet. lol

  448. lil_tm says:

    Ain’t nobody got time for that.

  449. SugarySpicey says:

    Yes, Sweetie, a Google Voice #.

  450. sweetie says:

    Spicey, you mean the Google Voice number?

  451. sweetie says:

    Lil, thank you. That was my thinking, too. My message was pretty clear. Will ask again and see what happens. Thank you! :)

  452. SugarySpicey says:

    Sweetie, just get a throwaway number (Google cell works great), text him a hello, send him your email address, and ask when you can see some pics.

  453. lil_tm says:

    I mean, what is the point of ignoring your request? You know he saw it.
    He knows he saw it. You both know physical attraction to some degree is important.

  454. lil_tm says:

    “Ladies and gents, advice is needed.
    I received a response to an inquiry in which I was asking access to his pictures. He replied saying he’s definitely interested (his words) and left me his phone number, no pictures though. How should I proceed? Ask again to see his pictures? I don’t want to make any blind calls.”

    I wouldn’t call/text.
    Anytime that has ever happened, it makes me suspicious and the fact that they NEVER follow through tells you everything you need to know.
    If he’s TRULY interested, he’ll come through with the pics. Ask again..if he doesn’t comply, no bueno.

  455. sweetie says:

    Ladies and gents, advice is needed.
    I received a response to an inquiry in which I was asking access to his pictures. He replied saying he’s definitely interested (his words) and left me his phone number, no pictures though. How should I proceed? Ask again to see his pictures? I don’t want to make any blind calls.

  456. SugarMeSpicey says:

    RDD – Spent a little time thinking about your “older man, younger baby” question. I think a sugar can definitely fall for her Daddy. I did once. So, I blogged about it tonight, if you’re interested in one girl’s thoughts (I know SoftiBastard thinks you shouldn’t take advice from a woman). If you click my name above it’ll take you to my rambling ruminations.

  457. lil_tm says:

    “There is more rudeness online than one will encounter in real life. On the other hand, this ability to give up some self-control brings out some inner thoughts and feelings (in the above case: a fetish for meaty labia) out into the open. IRL, that person wouldn’t go up to someone and ask the same question”

    The same could be said for anything..it’s human nature.
    Many times, if people know they can get away with something without the risk of repercussions for their actions, they will go ahead and do it.
    That’s when integrity comes into play.
    Doing the right thing regardless. I know I struggle with it, as I’m sure everyone else does.
    Unfortunately(or maybe fortunately), my conscious will bother me if I act on too much of my dark side.

  458. Noob_SD says:

    On the subject of encountering rude people – there are several factors beyond natural meanness that contribute to this. Just Google it “Why are people rude online” and you will find WSJ articles on it. Just a few pointers from the articles:

    a) Anonymity is a powerful force. Hiding behind a fake screen name makes us feel invincible, as well as invisible.
    b) Inflated sense of self: Most of us present an enhanced image of ourselves on social media. This positive image—and the encouragement we get, in the form of “likes”—boosts our self-esteem. And when we have an inflated sense of self, we tend to exhibit poor self-control.
    c) We’re less inhibited online because we don’t have to see the reaction of the person we’re addressing. Because it’s harder to see and focus on what we have in common, we tend to dehumanize each other.

    There is more rudeness online than one will encounter in real life. On the other hand, this ability to give up some self-control brings out some inner thoughts and feelings (in the above case: a fetish for meaty labia) out into the open. IRL, that person wouldn’t go up to someone and ask the same question (well I hope not :) )

  459. Jersey Darling says:

    @Spicey – Haha! So ironic that you mention that, but I’m quite over AC at the moment unless I have AMAZING company!

    Actually I’m thinking of heading down Memorial Day weekend for a show I’d like to see. 😛

  460. SugarySpicey says:

    Lo!! Teehee! Maybe tonight I’ll blog about my first Domme! Good luck!

  461. Lo says:

    okay guys I think I just agreed to be someones dominatrix..lol….Spicey I think I may need to bug you again at some point for a couple tips…

  462. lil_tm says:

    “@Beach – I have to agree with FB on this one…all those ‘bad’ SD incidences sound no different than bad ‘first date’ incidences from Match, POF, or any blind date. I guess my point is they are not SD related…they are just asshole men related. So if you want to avoid that, you just have to stop dating anyone….”

    Yep.

  463. lil_tm says:

    “Being french kissed, having someone grab your boob and having someone rub their member on you without permission is obviously unacceptable.”

    It’s the risk you take with this kind of thing, IMO.

    Just like when I walk down Bourbon St. during Mardi Gras. Chances are, someone scumball is going to grope at my boobs and behind.

    Like I said, don’t do big girl things if you can’t handle the repercussions.

  464. SugarySpicey says:

    Offer of the day: “Yor hot. How much if me and my buddy want to take you to AC for a weekend?”

    I assume that means Atlantic City. Just calculating my bus fair needs and I’ll be all over this one. Jersey, do you want in? Hot!!

  465. SugarySpicey says:

    No, Alicia, that is weird. How is MoneyGram easier than cash? And, how is he going to have an arrangement with no discretionary income she doesn’t watch? I’d ask how he sees a long term arrangement between the two of you working if he doesn’t have access to any cash.

  466. Alicia says:

    I have a question. Is it common for a married SD to pay you via MoneyGram for first date. He says he is married and doesn’t want his wife to find out since she handles all of the finances. Thank You for your input….

  467. RDamien says:

    Thanks for all the thoughtful input.

    Just to be clear, I’m more concerned that it’s just an act if that makes sense. In other words I’d rather she not say anything than tell me I’m perfect and she’s so lucky and her feelings are real. I was mentally prepared for NSA and now strings are attaching, at least on my part.

    SugarySpicey – I would call 20 very young too. I initially screened her out because of her age but we did meet and we clicked.

    FatBastard excellent point about social circles, but I cant say I’ve introduced her to mine either yet. I like that barometer though. I also agree with you on the age thing, it’s all case by case.

    DianaSBinOC thanks especially to you for sharing that as it sounds very close to what my situation is.

    JerseyDarling I plan to mention this when we go out next. I really just want her to be sincere, whatever that may mean for her. I get that guys love ego boosts and I understand a bit of that but there is a difference.

    Sweetie – We talk about a lot of things and conversation is easy and free flowing. We text constantly, I dont know how common either of those things are in a typical SB/SD relationship but it’s unexpected for me. In a perfect world yes I could fall for her. But it’s still too early to tell.

  468. sweetie says:

    Hehehe! I can’t believe the stuff people do and ask!

  469. FatBastardSD says:

    @ Frank

    Principium abs did cock block me once on the blog, but I mean you cannot really fight against something like that.

    As for other SD’s blocking me. F*uck’em.

    I did get a 4 paragraph essay in a message telling me how disgusting my profile was, and the SB blocked me after sending it. What is wrong with the world today when a guy cannot even specify how firm he wants a SB’s breasts to be?

  470. SugarySpicey says:

    I got blocked by an SD because he asked if I had meaty labia and I responded with, “I’m thinking Arby’s” blocking is silly.

  471. SugarySpicey says:

    Softi: French kissing by opening someone’s mouth with your hands and then tasting like cat food – whether with permission or not – is never appropriate.

  472. Frank says:

    Fat Daddy- It is my understanding that you have been blocked by a number of SD’s as well.

    I had a SB block me because she couldn’t type in my email address correctly.

  473. sweetie says:

    I’m not into turning heads when walking down the street and could not be dating or having an arrangement with a man whose age I’m uncomfortable with. I’d like to think we make a plausible couple, otherwise, forget it!

  474. sweetie says:

    FB about the groping etc without permission, yes that’s normally the case. Guys, please don’t stop being the gentlemen you are.

  475. sweetie says:

    RD “If it matters I’m 42, handsome, in very good shape, funny, charming and all that good stuff 😉 But, she’s 20.”
    What do you talk about with her, RD? Could you fall for her?

  476. FatBastardSD says:

    “Being french kissed, having someone grab your boob and having someone rub their member on you is obviously unacceptable.”

    Corrected to

    “Being french kissed, having someone grab your boob and having someone rub their member on you without permission is obviously unacceptable.”

  477. FatBastardSD says:

    @Beach_Girl

    Profiles with misleading information are fraud but that is why you have to meet in person and check for yourself.

    I think you have defined fraud with your examples. Is there anything one can do about it? Very little in most cases.

    As for being blocked: One I won’t discuss one because it may give away too much personal information. In the other case a SB had a very different way of describing how she treats people she likes in her profile. I thought it was a bit silly and messaged her a few times asking questions. It may be hard to believe but my sense of humor is not appreciated by everyone and she blocked me from sending any further messages.

    @Jersey Darling

    I always thought that the (age/2+7) rule was strange but there does seem to be some truth to it. Am I delusional here, are all of the extreme cases to the rule SD/SB relationships?

  478. WCSD says:

    @Beach – I have to agree with FB on this one…all those ‘bad’ SD incidences sound no different than bad ‘first date’ incidences from Match, POF, or any blind date. I guess my point is they are not SD related…they are just asshole men related. So if you want to avoid that, you just have to stop dating anyone….

    Where Spicey’s $100 false boss guy, that was a SD related story. Also we SDs get similar ‘first date’ shit come our way too. I’ve been sent naked pics as the first contact (that make me shudder and wish the burning in my eyes would stop), to ages and looks being different. In the end, I chalk that up to online dating….there are weirdos everywhere….

  479. Jersey Darling says:

    @RDamien – I’ve always liked older men, but at age 20 I was usually looking for 30-35. That said, if you are charming, in great shape, treat her well and aren’t jaded – your money probably brought her to the table, but YOU may have made her fall for you. You never know!

    Stop questioning the sincerity and enjoy it for what it is. All arrangements are generally assumed to be NSA, meaning they can end at any time. If you want her for something more than that, you should probably mention it to her; otherwise, kick back and enjoy the NSA 😉

  480. Beach_Girl says:

    And how does one know if they have been blocked by a SD?

    Have a great day sugars, it’s back to work for me 😀

  481. Beach_Girl says:

    FBSD~ Blocked by SBs? why?
    yes, valid examples. but people don’t know the reasons behind the action usually. And, how do you define fraud here? People poof, they don’t do what they say they will… allowance is given and the girl poofs etc It’s not like a SD or SB will take the other person to court…

  482. FatBastardSD says:

    @Beach_Girl

    I think both of your examples show the potential for fraud to have occurred. Of course you always have to hear the other side of the story. Did the SD not give the allowance for a good reason and did the SB poof for a good reason?

    A good reason is obviously in the eye of the beholder.

  483. FatBastardSD says:

    Well maybe I deserved to be blocked by 2 SB’s to be fair.

  484. Beach_Girl says:

    Frank~ yeah, I understand men can fall for women, but on a first date? No thanks!
    No I love yous on first dates…
    Fraud is intentional deception made for personal gain or to damage another individual or reputation. Breach of contract is also fraud.. so if a SD doesn’t give the allowance discussed and an arrangement is in place, is it fraud? If a SB poofs with the allowance, is it fraud?

  485. FatBastardSD says:

    Being french kissed, having someone grab your boob and having someone rub their member on you is obviously unacceptable. There is no excuse for this behaviour.

    At the risk of causing friction with the blog SB’s, the rest of the complaints are nothing worse than a SD will see with a SB, or in dating for that matter. Been there done that.

    While I have not been groped, there has been one situation that I would bet could be considered as equally unpleasant (and more dangerous). I am sure other SD’s have had experiences that would match mine.

    @DianaSBinOC

    43 blocked profiles on SA? You do seem a bit tightly wound but 43 blocked profiles seems high. I was blocked by about 5 members. I deserved to be blocked by 1 SB for sure, but the others were just too sensitive.

  486. Frank says:

    LO@plenty of bad behavior, I’m sure. Actually this is a post on Fraud, and SugarSpice’s example was the only fraud that was reported. Doesn’t seem to be the epidemic I feared.

  487. SugarySpicey says:

    Franki – I’m not a cynic, except in person and in writing. Truth is, I have a soft squishy side too, it just takes the right man to bring it out in me, and too often it’s my dark candy coating that men enjoy. So, it’s a difficult chicken and the egg situation.

    On the blog, I just don’t want other girls to make the same mistakes I did – it makes you feel like a dumpster.

  488. Frank says:

    Spicey-no wonder you have such a poor opinion of SDs. I try to not let my SB misadventures make me too cynical. Although I have come to realize I am not such a good judge of human nature as I thought.

  489. Frank says:

    Beach girl @2-Told me he was in love with me (this has happened many times) .

    Can we SD’s help that you are so wonderful!

  490. Lo says:

    actually my last SD exhibited certified sucky behavior but it’s too early for those details…

  491. SugarySpicey says:

    Frank – also forgot about the man who reached over, opened my mouth with his hands and shoved his tongue down my throat. That’s not scamming, but his mouth tasted like he had brushed his teeth with wet cat food, and I felt appropriately violated.

  492. Lo says:

    are you serious??? yes there’s plenty of bad behavior going around. Frank don’t be such a naive twenty year old lol.

  493. Beach_Girl says:

    Oh yeah, Age, height, weight are all things that I’ve been lied too about as well. When a pot SD lies about that stuff, we will find out. so why lie? Also lied to about wanting an arrangement, some wanted a GF with no sugar..
    Thanks Spicey, I totally forgot about that ^ what she said :D.

  494. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars!!!

    Frank~ Bad behavior from SDs… ok, here are a few. First emails, 1-“hi, do you do anal?” 2- Sent a pic of his penis.3- Sent a pic of him having sex with someone. 4-Asked me to take care of his kids, wanted me to be the nanny
    On a first coffee date, 1-he asked me to pay for coffee? lol 2-Showed up with someone else. 3-Brought his kids.
    first diner date, 1-during diner as we are talking he reached over and grabbed my boob to see if they were real?!?!? 2-Told me he was in love with me (this has happened many times) .
    First drink date, showed up not showered from the gym in his sweats (blah) 2-asked the waitress out.

    Is that enough?

  495. SugarySpicey says:

    Frank, I posted about being lied to by a man who used his boss’s name. When I Googled him everything checked out, and I was so inexperienced in the sugar bowl I didn’t know to get whatever gift$ I was seeking up front.

    But, he came clean “AFTER” the deal had been sealed, and he’d left the room with $100 on the dresser for me (anyone who has read this board twice knows how disgusting I would find that) even if I didn’t mind being treated like a hooker it was about 10% of what he’d stated would be a weekly arrangement – turns out IRL he made significantly less money than me and KNEW he couldn’t afford an arrangement but thought I’d be so dazzled that would be fine.

    He had grossly misrepresented the type of arrangement he offered, who he was, his height, his weight, his age, his marital status, and his children.

  496. Frank says:

    I suppose this topic is coming to an end. Early on I asked for examples of bad behavior by SD’s, and unless I missed some posts, the only example was a SD who said he wanted a relationship, but asked for sex at the end of the first date, and let the SB feel his hard member.

    I guess we SD’s are not so bad after all!

  497. DianaSBinOC says:

    @FatBastard-

    @DianaSBinOC

    “How about a first hand account of a SD scamming you.”

    Sorry I can’t provide help in this desire fatty. I can catch the scam way before even meeting them. I have about .. 68 profiles blocked on one SD site and here on SA 43 profiles.

    It’s as if they all download their fake pictures from the same site.

  498. DianaSBinOC says:

    @RDamien-

    “So SB’s have you ever fallen for a SD? If it matters I’m 42, handsome, in very good shape, funny, charming and all that good stuff But, she’s 20”.

    Yes:) I did and he also was charming, very generous, had a sexy accent, 37 and in amazing shape. He didn’t rush intimacy and took his time getting to know me. It would have gone into a regular relationship but he had some past and current issues to get in order before that could happen. He grew impatient so we had to go our separate ways.

    42 and 20 isn’t really that big of a deal. Had you been 50 which marks the senior citizen age, then I would probably feel it may be slightly unfair to hold someone that young down.

    Ignore Fat Bastard he is well… a Fat Bastard so… lol

  499. FatBastardSD says:

    @RDamien

    By the way until recently it was quite common for a 20 year old woman to marry and start a family. All of this talk of different places in life is just talk.

  500. FatBastardSD says:

    @RDamien

    Let’s just discuss your situation, who cares what others have done. Has you SB introduced you to her social circle? If so and you have impressed them you are in. If not, she is not serious about you.

    Don’t ask women for relationship advise ;-).

  501. SugarySpicey says:

    RDD – Yes, if an SD treats his SB well, is kind and generous (physically, sexually, financially, emotionally) and there’s real conversational chemistry, an SB can have very real, very fond feelings for an SD. Although, with an SB who is very young (I would call 20 very young) she is in a very different place than you are when it comes to relationships, so you should look at the arrangement and feelings as temporary, even if they are intense.

    But, why worry about it at all? Enjoy what you’re feeling. Enjoy the moment, and only give what you’re happy to give. That way, whether things go long term or not, you’re happy and satisfied with what you got out of the situation.

  502. RyanInAbq says:

    Personally none of those statistics are worth their weight in… well… statistics…

    I always put up front in my profile – coffee date first. Maybe a couple. See if we have chemistry before going any further. If by the second time I get the whiff of just being taken advantage of – I walk. I actually start with a maximum expenditure of something around a couple to few hundred dollars. If I get the “oh I am just a walking ATM machine” attitude, I drop it. I’ll play it like a “WhatsYourPrice” site and if we hit it off on the first meet, I give them money just to be nice and sincere. If we see each other again, it usually turns into something amazing. If I don’t, and before I see them I get the texts of “I’m getting kicked out of my apartment tomorrow”, etc., (I have an entire LIST of funny excuses) I just block them in Google Voice and never look back. Could they be sincere? Sure, maybe sometimes – but I have no patience for the drama anymore.

    When I started in this world, I was truly a noob – but not anymore. I think it’s cute how some of the college girls try to play me. It’s adorable and I just laugh. I’ve thought about running a small blog of all the ones I’ve encountered so others can learn, too.

    A couple however had been grateful and very sincere – and I spoiled them rotten. I’ve left them very happy and satisfied and probably ruined it for any of the real scumbag losers that frequent the site.

    I did want to mention – I like AlleyCat’s approach at 1st and 15th to avoid the hit and run. I had a hit-n-run once and it stung – but I learned my lesson. I felt a lot of the warning signs but didn’t pay attention to my gut. Learned not to do that anymore and I am sure it saved me a few times already.

    @DuneLandDaddy – you are truth personified. I wish I had your advice nine months ago or so when I started :) And I too have fallen victim to the SB that disappears for two weeks then comes crawling back when rent or the power company bill is due. There have been a couple that did that with such a sense of entitlement that I actually had fun with it – of course never giving them another dime.

    I also have the means (and use them) to perform background checks on potential SB’s as soon as I am able. It’s sad – so many people on both sides are almost clueless on how to protect their identity well enough that someone with a modicum of cyber-skills can’t look them up and find out their background. After meeting them once. I’ve managed to avoid a few that would have raised some serious issues.

    Google Voice and throwaway emails are the absolute best things ever invented. Learn them both and you’ll be far safer in the long run.

    I’ll say this over anything else. My ability to have “dates” with absolutely stunningly gorgeous women and not feel intimidated at all – and maintain the whole sticky-eye contact through very charming conversations has been priceless practice in its own right. Approaching any woman now in any venue and striking up a genuine conversation is as easy as reading a newspaper. And I used to be a geek with nothing but tongue-tied dorkism when in the company of a beautiful woman. Now? Night and day difference.

    After all is said and done…

    Having had some very wonderful – borderline transcendant religious – experiences with women ranging from nineteen to their very early twenties that are so smoking hot you can hear guys (and women’s) necks snap from spinning around to gape at them – has been an experience of a freakin’ lifetime – and no matter what ever happens, the last 10 months or so overall have been so awesome I could die tomorrow and go out totally and completely blissfully happy…

  503. RDamien says:

    DunelandDaddy – Thanks for that post it was helpful.

    To the SB’s out there I hope some of you could answer a question: This is my first SA relationship, am I incredibly naive to think a SB could fall for a SD?

    I’ve approached this as I would anyone I was dating. Taking things slow, treating her with complete respect. Nothing physical before we were “ready”. I actually gave her financial help before we even kissed. She seemed very sweet and sincere, and I figured if I “lose” it lesson learned but I wasnt going to be cynical for no reason.

    After a slow start everything has blossomed into her asking me to fool around all the time lol. NOT complaining! 😉 We text constantly and things are great. Things… seem great. I cant get past the arrangement thing sometimes so I doubt the sincerity.

    I’ve met 2 people from here, one was a SB who basically wanted to be paid X amount for Y act and looked zero like her onsite pictures. It was wrapped a bit more flowery than that but that’s what it came down to.

    Fortunately I stuck it out and met the person I am with now.

    So SB’s have you ever fallen for a SD? If it matters I’m 42, handsome, in very good shape, funny, charming and all that good stuff 😉 But, she’s 20.

  504. DianaSBinOC says:

    @NoobSD- I don’t blame your decision to stay away. Perhaps providing her full identity was her way of allowing you to do a thorough check. Then again maybe she felt you would even look. Trust is important and I agree with Spicey that since you know you’ll never feel completely comfortable around her.

    Last two in the last year? So she has more prior to last year? Get away from her fast. People make mistakes this is true but it sounds like she is still making them.

  505. DianaSBinOC says:

    @DuneLand D- Great post.

    @AlleyCatin AZ- I also agree with your method of how you break up an allowance. After reading comments from SDs that have provided an allowance in full only to have a pot SB disappear, I’m well aware that a full month allowance may put the SD at risk. Still I’m not a fan of the p4p transactional method either. Every week or every other week sounds more than fair imho.

  506. Noob_SD says:

    Thanks SugarySpicey … Unfortunately, I researched all that after I got her email. She didn’t bother to hide her name – the age, height, description were a clean match with the arrest records. I am just going to politely disengage. It’s possible that she’s just a youngster that made a few foolish mistakes – the charges were petty, but it’s not for me.

  507. SugarySpicey says:

    DandD – that is a perfect perspective, and a great way to find an SB that can be genuinely happy and provide for a real connection.

  508. SugarySpicey says:

    Noob – if an SB activates your spidey sense in the first communication just ignore them, there are too many fish in the sea to pursue someone you don’t trust. An SD who doesn’t mind/doesn’t check her background will be a better fit for her, now that you know her background you’d always be suspicious.

  509. Noob_SD says:

    SB Misdemeanor contacted me. What do I do? There is more than one arrest record stretching back over the years – all misdemeanors, couple of dismissals. The last two were in the last year. Instinct tells me to stay away.

    I do believe in second chances, turning a good leaf, pardon etc., but still …

  510. Noob_SD says:

    @ DunelandDaddy Thanks for taking the time to share your experiences.

  511. Alleycat in AZ says:

    @DunelandDaddy – great comments, and pretty much mirrors my own own approach and experience.

    I’ve found that an allowance vs a per-date approach has a slight psychological difference, in that a per-date approach tends to make the relationship a bit more transactional, despite what people say. An allowance frees both parties up and allows less focus on the $ and more on the relationship. I’d be curious to hear from others on that.

    I also provide allowance on the 1st and 15th of the month, rather thsn all at once, reduces the risk of a ‘hit and run’.

  512. SugarySpicey says:

    Fati: sometimes you give yourself away, the universe still surprises. Heretofore you shall be known as softy by this sugar.

  513. FatBastardSD says:

    @Beach_Girl

    Hope that answers your question as well!

  514. FatBastardSD says:

    @Jersey Darling

    I was a naive young man back when I first started (eight months ago)…

    In the beginning of my SA experience I assumed that the site was populated with SB’s who actually had an interest in dating/having a relationship with an guy outside of the conventionally accepted age range, as had happened to me IRL. In my IRL arrangement I provided her with things the guys she normally dated never did such as fun outings and buying her necessities she could not always afford. I also spent my time/money to give her death machine of car a tune up, brake job and tire replacement by the way. I have to ask when is the last time you people paid to service a car? Not exactly a cheap gift let me tell you.

    What I found on the SA site were SB’s looking for discrete, NSA arrangements. They often had BF’s on the side. It was about the money. I have the all or nothing approach. Either it’s a relationship, or it is about hooking up (Sweetie mentioned she noticed this attitude in SA SD’s) and just having fun in the process. As finding a genuine relationship seemed unlikely I changed my focus and things went well after that.

  515. Beach_Girl says:

    FBSD~ What were the expectations that you had and why couldn’t you get them? You did find a SB, what did you compromise on that you wanted at first?

  516. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars 😀

    Noob_SD~ Just curious as to your area, didn’t mean that you should out yourself. It is hard to find what you are looking for, but with some time and lots of dates, you get there eventually. 😀

    gtt_envy~ Not that I don’t want to have sex, but not on a first date. I think the first date is to see if we click/chemistry. Second date to talk more arrangement, maybe 3-4 date intimacy, but it should feel right and fun. I don’t usually ask for an allowance at the first date or even a gift. To me it’s a meet and greet thing. If we agree to have an arrangement then the allowance should start. But it has been discussed and we both know what to expect. I have never gotten my allowance before we agree to an arrangement and I’ve never poofed after I got the allowance. If I don’t think it’s going to work, I don’t go to the second date, I am not here to waste my time or the pot SDs.
    I’ve never done a weekend away to meet someone, they have always come to me. And never has sex been on the table for the first 3-4 dates.
    About your date with the SB, was it a first date? was the arrangement agreed upon? or did you just say ” I can give you this much if we get into an arrangment etc…” you gave her the allowance without confirmation of an arrangement? I don’t get why people poof like that, I’m sorry that, that happened to you

    Well, I am over the bull crappy SD from yesterday, I was upset… apparently when you get older you get more crabby lol… I think it’s because I haven’t smoked in 2 weeks. It took me one month, last time I stopped smoking to stop being… bitchy?!?!? lol… but I am back to being my happy self today 😀

  517. Jersey Darling says:

    @FatBastard – “I also had a certain expectation of the type of arrangement that I could find when I started with SA.”

    What was that expectation?

  518. DunelandDaddy says:

    @ Noob_SD: I’ve been off and on this site for about 2 1/2 years, and have had four very enjoyable SB-SD arrangements, one of which lasted more than a year. I’m 57 and prefer SBs in their early to mid-20s. Perhaps I can provide you with a few helpful hints.

    For starters, contrary to some of the advice here, don’t be put off just because a woman contacts you first, either with a wink or an email. I actually prefer that because it signals that the woman is comfortable with being with a man who is 30-35 years older than her — not a small consideration.

    Don’t waste a lot of time emailing. If she looks good and her profile is promising, suggest meeting her for a drink and see what happens face-to-face. Even if the meeting is a total bust, it will be good practice for dealing with future SB situations.

    Meeting for a drink is the best choice. Alcohol is a necessary social lubricant, and not having to fuss with ordering food etc. will help you both relax and focus on the matter at hand.

    Treat the first meeting as you would any first date — just because you’re paying doesn’t mean you shouldn’t strive to make the best possible first impression (I’ve had SBs tell me about potential SDs who show up looking like they just rolled out of bed.)

    Start off with get-to-know-each-other talk — jobs, family, favorite movies, favorite vacation spot — whatever helps both of you get a handle on the person they’re dealing with. This will relax you both and, frankly, should give you a pretty good idea if there’s any reason to continue exploring the possibility of an arrangement.

    I generally segue into the arrangement part of the conversation by asking her why she decided to post a profile on SA and, if she’s not totally new at this, what some of her experiences have been with men she has met on the site. This is where you should also talk about why YOU are on the site. (My standard explanation — and believe me, it’s the truth — is that I much prefer the company of beautiful young women, and at my age, women of that description aren’t exactly beating my door down to go out with me IRL.)

    At this point, I usually get down to cases (assuming I’m interested in pursuing an arrangement with her) by asking: “So, what do you think? Do you want to try this with me?” If she’s had arrangements in the past, you can be pretty straightforward about what you want and what you’re willing to do for her. If she’s inexperienced, you need to be a little more circumspect. Many women on this site — especially the newbies — are very sensitive about the money aspect of arrangements. Tell her what you want in terms of meeting frequency and date types and what your thoughts are in terms of payment. If she’s an experienced SB, let her tell you what she expects in terms of money. If she’s new, I think it’s better if the man starts the financial discussion because she’ll probably be uncomfortable putting a dollar value on her time with you.

    One tricky thing here is whether to provide a monthly allowance or pay for her time on a per-date basis. Unless the woman comes across as totally reliable, I generally insist on per-date payment, at least for the first few meetings. I’ve had SBs who get their monthly allowance and then disappear for two weeks, until the next month’s rent is due or the power company comes calling. Starting out on a per-date basis will help you both figure out if you can trust each other when it comes to money. Once your arrangement is going smoothly, you can switch to a monthly deposit into her bank account, which pretty much removes money from the equation and allows you to focus on making each other happy :) Some women will absolutely refuse a per-date arrangement. In that case, you’ll just have to decide if she’s worth the risk of a month’s allowance.

    Which brings me to a final point: You have got to be willing to put money at risk here. Not every potential SB is going to live up to your expectations or her promises. In those cases, you’ve got to be able to shrug, walk away and look for an SB who will. If you can’t afford to do that, than you probably shouldn’t be on this site. And once you meet a promising SB, don’t throw nickels around like they’re manhole covers. Buy her stuff, give her a “bonus” every now and then, take her to nice places. You don’t have to be Christian Grey (the money part of Christian Grey, I mean), but a well-kept sugar baby is a happy sugar baby. And a happy sugar baby almost invariable means a happy sugar daddy.

    Sorry for the length of this post. Hope it helps.

  519. SugarySpicey says:

    Fati: that was actually a rather sexy statement in Spiceyville: “Happy to give that amount” coupled with an ability to do so.

  520. FatBastardSD says:

    @Principium

    Don’t get me wrong, I think your approach is good. I just wanted to point out that the ability AND desire to give an allowance should never be underestimated.

    @gtt_envy

    You can track those same profiles. If these SB’s actually want to find a SD you will see the profiles change with time, otherwise the profiles become inactive or are deleted.

    I also had a certain expectation of the type of arrangement that I could find when I started with SA. When I realized this was very difficult to find I made a decision to change what I would accept. The alternative was to leave the site.

  521. SugarySpicey says:

    Awkward! My neighbor just came over to tell me she’d caught her 14 year old son perving on me getting dressed, and could I please get a more substantial drape in my bathroom? Hmmm, my shoulder angel said, “Of course.” My shoulder devil says, “F*ck you bitch! He’s the peeping Tom. I’m putting on a show tonight!”

  522. lil_tm says:

    “And, I believe an SB should put on her best sexy show during that first encounter. If you’re not ready to put on your best sexy show, tequila and KY warming liquid help. Fati: that isn’t because her SD is old and ugly, it’s because us ladies get performance anxiety too. If I get too nervous, Fort Knox – ain’t nobody getting in! And nobody wants that.”

    I agree that a little drink beforehand while getting ready is a great idea. I def feel more sexy after a glass of wine. It takes the edge off. And KY warming liquid is awesome anyway. Even if you’re alone.

  523. lil_tm says:

    Well, I know they say when it rains, it pours. I went a few days without any messages and then all the sudden recieved an influx from younger SDs.
    (Younger being in their 40’s) Not that I have anything against men older than that, it’s just that Papi doesn’t appeal to me.

    So there’s a physician who lives a state over and is very easy to talk to.
    A business owner who lives one city away and is a little harder to talk to, but wants to be discreet, so that could be why. (I suspect he may be married)
    And another business owner who lives a state over as well. He doesn’t like to chit chat as much, but he seems very busy, so that’s understandable but he’s got a great sense of humor and that is soooooo important. He’s going to be here at the end of the month and comes here once every month, so that would be convenient for me.

    But last night they were all texting me at once and it was nerve racking!
    Part of me felt bad about it, but then I realized that it was quite possible I would never hear from any of them again due to various reasons, so why not?
    We’re unattached until otherwise is claimed, right?

    Then I received a text from the ex I have mentioned before who lights my fire. I cannot tell ya’ll how hard it is not to put on my rockets skates and go running. Usually I hate him, but a dry spell will do strange things to a girl.
    Young men, while good looking and fun and full of life, are usually a disappointment. It seems men mature so much more slowly than women do.
    They are too worried about their guy friends and what people will think and “getting money” blech! They also tend to be flakey.
    And they won’t straighten up until you put your foot down and if I have to do that, I figure they had their chance, so adios amigo! Then they beg to come back, but they should have come correct or not at all!

    Sorry guys, just venting. Deep down I truly want to find someone I can love again because I know I have so much love to give and I want someone to adore and grow old with who wants the same, but finding a truly good match is so hard. Sometimes, it seems impossible.
    But, I’ll keep fighting the good fight!

  524. SugarySpicey says:

    Good morning sugars –

    Feeling giggly and girly today!

    Esteban and your Toyota – love Toyotas, I’ve taken three Camry’s over 200K and only ever replaced the batteries. That said, although I don’t care what someone drives (I am a really bad driver so I’d never buy a nice car), a POT SB may be concerned that she’s being conned. I would suggest a first date in a venue that shows you are serious about treating her well (read nice and $$$ – SDs who are more overt with their wealth have more flexibility on the trust front). Furing that date be real about who you are. It allows trust to be established before intimacy is suggested, and then she doesn’t have to worry that you’re a Corolla Catfish.

    Fati: You now understand my comment about hygiene, it wasn’t man musk I was complaining about. Do we need to relink to the DB infographic of ’13? Age? I prefer older men. But, if a man is forty years older than his SB I don’t think he should also spend time worrying if she’s “really attracted to me” if she puts on a good show, don’t look for trouble. Re: ugly SDs, I’ve always said that an SB shouldn’t have sex with someone they don’t want to have sex with, period. If a girl thinks a POT is “ugly” she should leave him waiting in the sugar bowl for someone who doesn’t. If an SD thinks of himself as ugly, but his SB behaves enthusiastically about seeing him, again he shouldn’t look for trouble by questioning that.

    Jersey: Daniel Craig!!!!!!! Mmmmmm!!!!!!

    Allowance Giving: It is absolutely adorable when a man gives a gift after the first date. I don’t expect it, but I adore it, and it turns me on and speeds up the “getting me naked” process, but I’m kinky like that.

    I believe that for both parties it is best to gift incrementally in the beginning, a weekly portion of the allowance immediately preceding first intimacy, and then weekly at meetings until a rhythm is established. This allows both parties to decide if they’re liking the arrangement, and nobody gets screwed, in an unpleasant way. I would NEVER advise giving a substantial portion of the allowance weeks/days before the “deal is closed” unless the SD himself wants to take things slow. If the SB wants a slow, “getting comfortable” phase, this should be sans allowance. If you’re interviewing with a company, expenses associated with the interview are paid, but you don’t start getting a paycheck until you start doing the job. I think as “jobs” are usually expected in an arrangement, the “mutual benefits” should begin at the same time as the “jobs.”

    And, I believe an SB should put on her best sexy show during that first encounter. If you’re not ready to put on your best sexy show, tequila and KY warming liquid help. Fati: that isn’t because her SD is old and ugly, it’s because us ladies get performance anxiety too. If I get too nervous, Fort Knox – ain’t nobody getting in! And nobody wants that.

  525. gtt_envy says:

    @beach_girl, question since you are not down for sex do you expect a full allowance from the beginning? Just talking outloud here, but I personally have been scammed this way and that’s the fear from the male side.

    Had a great date, at least I thought, we planned to see each other again in two weeks nothing physical happed that night. I gave her half her allowance and wired th rest the next week and guess what? NO date see ya!!

    Nowadays, if we are just going on a date it will be fun filled not just dinner. Always includes a event of some sort and I’ll give you a token amount $100-200 depending on distance from your residence etc. NO longer will I give a full allowance without the physical piece.

    Back to the new age SB that has seemed to crop up for whatever reason. 5 new profiles in my search area that I clicked on let’s see quotes from them:

    “I am not a escort if you are looking for something physical keep looking”
    “If you can’t afford 10K+/month don’t send me a message”
    “Looking for fun dates, good times, something mutually beneficial and platonic”
    “Let’s be friends and get to know one another. I love handbags”

    Then there are the profiles that are logged in everyday or at least it seems for the last 2-3 years which I run from because it seems like a job for them.

  526. Jersey Darling says:

    “If you look further back on the blog you’ll see a post about a SD that contacted his sugar baby to go shopping. He ends up spending the entire day buying items for himself and towards the end of his shopping spree (for himself) he allows her one small trinket.” – DianaSB

    That story was actually mine, and yes it did suck. I also have another story from the vaults related to a man driving nice cars…

    One of the pots I dated from here was an older, very good looking gentleman – a Daniel Craig lookalike. He had several expensive cars and loved taking me out in them when we’d go to restaurants. He’s the only SD I ever felt uncomfortable with in public – between the car and how we’d look together we’d turn every head, and often through dinner I’d catch people staring and whispering. It bothered me because I knew what they were assuming, and to be honest the nice clothes I wore, etc didn’t come from him; I bought them for myself! He didn’t spend that much on me and I was new at the time.

    Suffice it to say that I could care less about the car a pot is driving, I care more about your generosity and what you spend on me. You can have all the money in the world and it means nothing to me unless you’re willing to share it.

  527. Noob_SD says:

    @ Beach Girl I am in the States in the South in one of the big cities. I’m sorry – somehow I like my anonymity on this blog and would prefer not to meet anyone from here – see how Dennis Rodman got outed above? :) I don’t want to end up like that. I mentioned the possibility of having run into an SB from here because of her profile. I’m sorry to hear about the pot SD you are having trouble with. It is times like these you need a relaxing massage.

    @ Smelly Men Sometimes the food we eat is the reason behind it. A cologne can mask it, but most colognes don’t last that long. Sweat is a big culprit. Onion/garlic is well known. But there are others not so well known. Asparagus is an example – it creates a pungent smell in the urine, but only 22% of the population is able to detect it. Maybe Rodman eats a lot of Asparagus or Durian, who knows? Some food for thought :)

    On the topic of being successful in the sugar bowl I have tried the direct approach – come flat out and talk about # of meets, allowance upfront. In many cases, it just scares pot SBs off and makes it look like a business transaction (bordering on escort/John approach). I am going to try a different approach – first meet – see if the chemistry is there – hopefully the pot SB is not one of the 22% who can smell the Asparagus :) . In general terms, I have not been able to bridge one of the following: the trust gap, and the expectation gap.

    Noob giving advice to vets Sorry about that. I will admit, I have not been successful in the sugar bowl, all I am doing is sharing my observations over the last 2 months. So just to expand on what I have observed.

    The trust gap: This is where the pot SD/SB is not sure if the other person means what they say in their profile, is she going to take the money and run?, does he/she really look like what they say they do on their profile? etc. Presumptions can lead to that as well – for example, XYZ drives a 2008 Toyota, so he must not be rich. And of course, the infamous stealer-SDs, that started this whole blog, who are out to taste the sugar with no intention of paying for it – sorry to say, that does exist – there is at least one blog by a guy who explains how he does it.

    The expectation gap: This can be looks/personality. It is my gut feeling that many of the younger SBs dream is to find that “young, good-looking and rich” SD. How realistic this is, I have no idea – but I am not in that category. The converse is also true – I have some expectations as well – I tend to like intelligent girls that know what they want out of life and are very articulate. But I want looks too – I never answered that wink from “fluffilicious’ even though she sounded intelligent. The other big ones are allowance, sexual expectations (one SB’s rant about rough anal sex comes to mind), schedule conflicts (the numerous profiles that say flexible schedule and you find the pot is juggling kids, job, school and then the SD). Then there are those hopeful souls who are looking for a LTR (long term relationship). Then the accusations start flying – “SB/SD has unrealistic expectations” :)

    BMW and green BMW does have a diesel engine that they sell in the US market in a coupleof models – it gives good mileage. So quit dissing BMW y’all :)

  528. DianaSBinOC says:

    Hiya Honey!

    I haven’t seen you in forever. Welcome back:)

  529. DianaSBinOC says:

    Hi Esteban,

    Most of the new comments here are moderated at least the first few times you post. So there is a delay in how they appear or maybe when they do.

    “I’m new to all this. I have a question for sugar babes…

    “Does it matter what kind of car I drive? (I drive a 2008 Toyota). I don’t live in an upscale condo or wear expensive watches etc. . It’s just not my style. I do have substantial disposable from my investments, but for me I prefer to live simply. I’m glad to spend money on my girl but have little interest trying to look like a playboy.”

    It’s not required that you drive a BMW to be a sugar daddy.

    “Do sugar daddys need to project the image of a rich guy? Do I need to pick you up in a new BMW?”

    Not at all.

    If you look further back on the blog you’ll see a post about a SD that contacted his sugar baby to go shopping. He ends up spending the entire day buying items for himself and towards the end of his shopping spree (for himself) he allows her one small trinket.

    Sounds pretty bad doesn’t it? Exactly.

    If you’re more concerned with spoiling your sugar baby then you have no need to worry about something you drive away in. If she does you can direct her to the many fakes that will drive up in a rented BMW and leave her with nothing.

  530. Principium says:

    @ FB: let me define the steps which I take in the seduction process. But before I do that, let me preface this by stating that using PUA (Pick Up Artist) techniques and shenanigans is not my idea of seduction, because as i have stated time and time again, I am not in the “college-bro: age demographics or social & economical status of a 20 something year old young man. With that out of the way:

    Step # 1 APPROACH: I firmly believe in opening up the dialogue and NOT the other way around. I have been on this site 3 times already. I have had incessant number of winks and one sentence email messages from SBs. We all know about the winkers. I can honestly only think of one young lady who wrote to me and I actually found her to be extremely articulate, bright and charming. I can not think of another similar case.

    Step # 2 INTRODUCTION: this is really what you put in your profile and your email. There are multiple ways of putting together a well honed introduction. If one’s method is to make offers to the SB right off the bat in the 1st email message, that is not the technique which I have ever chosen. This is the part whereby I may apply some of the “Game” principles and and compose a funny and somewhat teasing email message. It works with some and it back fires with some. Quite frankly, I enjoy some brand of humor that which is not every one’s cuppa, so if I’m shooting over someone’s head from the outset, well. it is not really going to go anywhere promising.

    Step # 3 QUALIFICATION: during the first few email, text and/or phone conversation I will get a pretty good idea if I had made an error in my first two steps or not. If I feel that I did, based on some checklists, I will not escalate to the next stage. So in essence, we (SDs & SBs) are going to qualify the other person for the purpose of escalation to a meeting/1st date.

    Step # 4 ATTRACTION: this is different than being attracted to someone based on their profile, some photos and communication. This is the moment of truth and it can not be denied unless you like to be perpetually catfished.

    Step # 5 COMFORT/RAPPORT: to me this is a very critical stage which encompasses many components such as determining whether there is the right chemistry and energy for the purpose of compatibility. Of course in an arrangement this is when the dynamics of an arrangement to include allowance and “visits” are discussed and negotiated. This is when the proverbial handshake takes place between two consenting adults without any coercion or deception.

    Step # 6 INTIMACY: for me, this is the finale of this process and the start of the next phase which is the commencement of that elusive NSA which we all keep harping on about.

    Admittedly I have not been very successful at this through the website, but I do not think that there is anything wrong with the method. Sometimes as people we are just not on the same page but my own biggest flaw is that I am extremely unforgetful and when I take the time to patiently follow these steps, I allow very little margin of error for those who do not comply with their promises.

  531. Honey says:

    Hello all, been a while since I have been on the blog, lots of new faces…

  532. Rosie says:

    @Princi & Lil_tm

    Just re-read what I posted above and I meant the world is smaller when talking about Rodman. Do not sip martinis and type at the same time. 😉

  533. sweetie says:

    All this notoriety is bad for business. Nobody is happy in the sugar bowl anymore, there’s nobody to play with.

  534. FatBastardSD says:

    I suspect Esteban was talking about environmentally friendly men who drive a Prius for example. I just assumed they were all gay and would have no desire for a SB though.

    @Estaban

    I am wondering how you offer such a good deal on your guitars?

  535. sweetie says:

    BG, sorry dear :( Let’s hope the next one is a good one! Sending you good vibes :)

  536. Rosie says:

    @Noob_SD

    No, you didn’t come off as a “sad sack”. I’m just forever the overtly positive, idealist so just giving you a little “don’t give up yet” cheer! 😉

  537. Principium says:

    SA got jabbed at by Bill Maher on his HBO show “Real Time with Bill Maher” in his New Rules section.

    The piece was not about SA, but about disparity between the rich and the poor in America, when he mentioned that now there is a website by the name of Seeking Arrangements where older rich men meet with college co-eds. The men offer to pay for “tuition fees” and the co-eds offer “companionship”. If I can be bothered (I probably won’t) I may rewind the DVR to write the exact quote in verbatim. You can probably go to Real Time on HBO.Com or watch it on YouTube.

  538. FatBastardSD says:

    @ Noob_SD

    I have a different point of view from Principium. I don’t know anything about seduction game IRL, which may explain my use of the site :-), but here is my take on things.

    The first point I would like to discuss is that the key to seduction on SA is the following:

    Determine the allowance you can provide and be HAPPY to provide it to the RIGHT SB.

    You can read comments from certain SB’s on the blog discussing how old, ugly and smelly most SD’s are. The flip side of this is that the sexy, young, hygienic men they are attracting are not providing the SB with an allowance. Do not forget this as you do have something VERY valuable to offer. Do not listen to the SB’s who will attempt to diminish this fact. How much of an allowance are these SB’s willing/able to give anyone?

    The second point is that the above applies only to seduction. An arrangement is a relationship (limited by what you and the SB agree to) and you will have to treat is as one. As in any relationship “Bust a deal, face the Wheel.”.

  539. Rosie says:

    @Spicey

    Glad your date was a good one!

    @Beach

    Oh sorry girl. Hang in there!

  540. Rosie says:

    Princi & lil_tm

    Small world, right? Well, maybe not when you’re talking about Rodman. He hit on me in a NYC bar! Not only was he smelly and drunk (and who knows what else?), he was head to toe in Ed Hardy (“LOVE KILLS”) garb. Hat, t-shirt, shoes, Everything. Insult to injury much?

  541. Beach_Girl says:

    Spicey~ Not everyone reads the blog. I wish that it would be understood that even if this is an arrangement site, wooing is a must! on both sides… I am just over the games, lets just be open and honest in what we want and do what was said. If you are not interested then just say so… not hard!
    I’m just pissed off… I’ll get over it!

  542. Beach_Girl says:

    Esteban~ not sure what you mean by “green men …etc” There are pot SDs that have money but don’t show it off. Was there a point you were trying to make?
    Welcome to the blog by the way

  543. SugarySpicey says:

    Didn’t quite understand your post Esteban, but welcome.

    Beach, apparently reading the boards can be good for Noobs. He was adorable in his “getting it.”

  544. Esteban says:

    disregard above, off topic. unless someone wants to take it up.

  545. Beach_Girl says:

    Spicey~ It makes me insane…I know people play the game, but I can’t stand it. Also, not smoking makes me more of a bitch lately 😀
    Glad your date went well 😀 good for you, lets hope this pot SD gets it!

  546. SugarySpicey says:

    Sorry Beach – that sucks! It sucks when women do it, it sucks when men do it, it just generally sucks.

  547. Esteban says:

    They are well off green men that don’t wear cologne or wear or drive flashy shit. Especially in Austin.

  548. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars!

    I just wish that the pot SDs that I meet do what they say they will. Just stop playing fucking games, it makes me nutty as hell. And no, I won’t sleep with you on the first f’n date! how hard is that to understand? And yeah, a little wooing is nice… ok, I think I’m done ranting

    Noob SD~ Where are you at? Everyone has met someone that is flaky, but it’s not always like that.

  549. Principium says:

    “Is there a reason you’re smelling men? Seems odd that his smell is what you noticed rather than high brightly colored hair. lol”

    His 6′ 10″ frame, bright color hair, tats, jewelry, etc; could not be missed on TV but his pungent scent not so discernible through your TV, unless you have the latest scratch & sniff LCD screen 😉

  550. sweetie says:

    Spicey, I’m glad you’re excited. I’m sure he would love to squeal like a teenage girl as well. Hey, he probably did already, but playing it cool, though.

  551. DianaSBinOC says:

    “I used to bump into Dennis Rodman at the local clubs all the time in the late 90′s, when he lived in Newport Beach, CA. He had a very pungent smell about him.”

    Is there a reason you’re smelling men? Seems odd that his smell is what you noticed rather than high brightly colored hair. lol

    “Anyone that large has to carry a scent. lol”
    That’s what I thought.

    “I like a person who is unique, but he is just waaay to radical for my tastes.”

    I would agree here as well.

  552. sweetie says:

    Hehe, now he knows! We need to invent some kind of SB blog language.
    Hey, Mr. SD, please allow the girls some privacy 😉

  553. SugarySpicey says:

    Sweetie – he reads these fans boards, or else I would talk all about the fact that I totally can’t wait to hump him. Lol

  554. sweetie says:

    Spicey, please dish out the goods! All ears!

  555. DianaSBinOC says:

    “I actually had a conversation very similar to this in January with someone I dated IRL (committed). It didn’t work out…but not because of ‘the secret’. I guess I look at it that it isn’t something I’m ashamed I’ve done. Interesting to think that for some people it obviously is something that they are ashamed of…”

    I feel the same way. I’m also single and since I desire to connect with other single men, I have never felt ashamed of my desire to sugar date. Dirty secret? Not at all.

  556. Esteban says:

    I’m new to all this. I have a question for sugar babes…

    Does it matter what kind of car I drive? (I drive a 2008 Toyota). I don’t live in an upscale condo or wear expensive watches etc. . It’s just not my style. I do have substantial disposable from my investments, but for me I prefer to live simply. I’m glad to spend money on my girl but have little interest trying to look like a playboy.

    Do sugar daddys need to project the image of a rich guy? Do I need to pick you up in a new BMW?

  557. lil_tm says:

    “I used to bump into Dennis Rodman at the local clubs all the time in the late 90′s, when he lived in Newport Beach, CA. He had a very pungent smell about him. Not hating, just the truth!”

    Anyone that large has to carry a scent. lol
    I like a person who is unique, but he is just waaay to radical for my tastes.

  558. SugarySpicey says:

    A little bit smitten!

  559. Principium says:

    I used to bump into Dennis Rodman at the local clubs all the time in the late 90’s, when he lived in Newport Beach, CA. He had a very pungent smell about him. Not hating, just the truth!

  560. lil_tm says:

    “@ Lil: I was told by them so, but I suppose they could have been BS’ing. The Dennis Rodman reference is an old school thing (you are probably too young) referring to the era when he was a rebounding champion in the NBA. Quite frankly, I stopped watching BB after the hay day of the Bulls & MJ in the late 80′s & early 90′s so I have no idea who the new rebound champs are! LeBron James maybe?”

    Funny thing…I met Dennis Rodman once in a club. He approached me, but was definitely on something and was very scary in person!
    He had piercings everywhere and lime green hair lol.
    Someone told me he was on ectasy..probably true.
    I understand he was quite the party animal.

  561. Principium says:

    @ Lil: I was told by them so, but I suppose they could have been BS’ing. The Dennis Rodman reference is an old school thing (you are probably too young) referring to the era when he was a rebounding champion in the NBA. Quite frankly, I stopped watching BB after the hay day of the Bulls & MJ in the late 80’s & early 90’s so I have no idea who the new rebound champs are! LeBron James maybe?

  562. Noob_SD says:

    @Principium Yes, it was probably my mistake in thinking that you cut through all that with the “arrangement” business. I will take your advice and change my mindset and let’s see what happens.

    @Rosie Thanks for the note. I hope I don’t come across as a “sad sack” – just sharing my experiences and thoughts. I will give this a few more months, or till I get tired/bored of it. Of course, I am only talking about my side of the story – I am sure there are enough SB stories of getting scammed by SDs as well.

    I am pretty sure I ran into one SB that used to post here, but schedule/distance …. was problematic. It was not meant to be. C’est la vie! :)

  563. lil_tm says:

    My opinion about attached SBs who are just dipping their toes in comes from personal experiences. I had 3 POTs who contacted me many months (one almost a whole year) after the initial communication & meeting (with two of them) which never got beyond the first meeting. I honestly have become to think that being single and unattached has not worked very well in my favor.”

    But how do you know they are attached and not just emotionally unavailable or unsure of the sugar bowl?
    We always assume if these things happen, it’s because we are not considered #1 in the person in questions eyes.
    And who wants to be #2?? Not me! :)

    But the thing is, I lost contact with my first SD. It wasn’t because I was attached to someone else. It was because I was too much of a noob and fearful of the idea. It took a minute to get used to.

    Being single and unattached is where it’s at, imo.
    Until someone comes along that changes my mind, that is. We should never setlle and keep our standards high. A commitment is not to be taken lightly.

  564. Principium says:

    My opinion about attached SBs who are just dipping their toes in comes from personal experiences. I had 3 POTs who contacted me many months (one almost a whole year) after the initial communication & meeting (with two of them) which never got beyond the first meeting. I honestly have become to think that being single and unattached has not worked very well in my favor.

    Now why did I not pursue with the come backs?! Come on!

    A- for one second, I did not believe that my # was the only one which they had kept.

    B- I’m not the Dennis Rodman of relationships

    C- who? I usually toss numbers away after a month of no contact. Never will put myself in a position to do stupid things like drunk or desperation texting.

  565. lil_tm says:

    Re: Playing hard to get.

    I don’t think a woman should be so easily attainable. Of course, a man shouldn’t have to beg, but unless I feel a guy is willing to put in some effort for me and I truly feel I am worth his time, I won’t even entertain the idea of him.

    The reason is because I believe I have lots of good stuff to offer, and I’m not just giving it away to every Tom, Dick and Harry! :)

  566. Principium says:

    @ Noob_SD: “…They bring with them the worst bane of regular dating – playing hard to get…”

    That is a very loaded statement and I don’t know about your skill set and level of competency when it comes to playing the game of seduction with women in America (every nation is different) Without going into why this really ought to be treated like regular dating but with even better seduction skills set, I can tell you with certainty that most of these “playing hard to get” or “flakey” SBs are actually involved with someone else. A lot of them enter this site out of curiosity and after a few days or weeks, delete their profiles and leave because of all the unpleasantness that has already been discussed ad nauseam.

    On the other hand, the SBs who are unattached and/or are seasoned veterans of the Sugar dating, are more self-aware of their expectation (whether reasonable or unreasonable, in your opinion) Again another topic which has already been beaten to death.

  567. Rosie says:

    @Noob_SD

    Don’t give up yet. Not sure where you’re located, but I hear there seem to be more “scammers” in some areas than others. Not sure I believe that as I think scammers are everywhere in life – no matter where you go. You just have to screen better and for goodness’ sakes, run from the girls who claim they “don’t trust guys because of past relationships” or feel it’s okay to treat a guy horribly because she’s been burned too many times. Hate me for saying this, girls. But I think that is excuse is idiotic. Sure, guard your heart a little maybe, but treat someone else badly because you were treated badly? That just makes YOU a bad person. Better luck to you, Noob!

    @WCSD & lil_tm

    The way WC describes it is how it kind of went for my BF and I when we talked briefly about my past and he knew I dated generous men in the past. He jokingly said, “so, can I be your new sugar daddy?” Gulp! I nearly choked on my wine when he said that, of course. 1) it was really quite funny and 2) a part of me wondered if he knew something I didn’t. So now it’s a joke between us. But I certainly haven’t shared all the details and will never volunteer the information. Not because I’m ashamed or embarrassed, but as lil_tm said, most people just don’t understand or accept this lifestyle (esp on the SB side) so I never want anything blowing up in my face.

  568. lil_tm says:

    Re: FattyB
    He’s funny and seems to have a light personality. If he weren’t already spoken for, I might have to send him a proposal. :p

  569. lil_tm says:

    “This is an interesting concept. I’m single, and and now open to actual real dating (it took a long time to get to that spot). But, I would have no problems telling people that I was (am) in this lifestyle. Am I going to parade around with a banner advertising it? No. But hide it? No. It is part of my life. I guess I have the advantage that I’ve only ever used it as a single person…so there isn’t that ‘commitment’ issue problem that I’d show the person. But to me it would probably just come up naturally in a conversation. ‘What have you been doing since you became single?’ “Well, I wasn’t ready for anything serious, so I did some casual dating. I’d help them out if needed, etc”. ‘Oh, you were a sugardaddy!’ “Yes, I guess you could call it that.” And on the conversation would go. I actually had a conversation very similar to this in January with someone I dated IRL (committed). It didn’t work out…but not because of ‘the secret’. I guess I look at it that it isn’t something I’m ashamed I’ve done. Interesting to think that for some people it obviously is something that they are ashamed of…”

    Well, it’s not because of embarrassment. It’s because most of the guys I have dated on a serious level do not want to know the details of previous bf’s.
    There is also a stigma attached to girls doing this kind of thing whereas guys can get away with it scott free.
    Think of the majority of the population and how they perceive if a girl sleeps around. She is a slut. Add the monetary factor/gifts to that and you are just giving people a reason to judge.
    Guys can sleep around and be studs and get pats on the back.
    I am not saying it’s right or that I believe it as well, I’m saying most people are close minded and cannot fathom someone just doing what makes them happy.

    I am a firm believer in not really caring what others think of me, but I don’t go around sharing my personal business, either.
    I have only dated a couple guys who I believe would be ok with this sort of thing. Most would be either jealous or it just wouldn’t sit well with them.

    :)

  570. I’m never early, but here I am waiting. I did just get ID’d so that’s a plus.

  571. WCSD says:

    ‘As for future boyfriends, no way Jose…I’d never mention something like this to them. It’ll have to be my dirty little secret’

    This is an interesting concept. I’m single, and and now open to actual real dating (it took a long time to get to that spot). But, I would have no problems telling people that I was (am) in this lifestyle. Am I going to parade around with a banner advertising it? No. But hide it? No. It is part of my life. I guess I have the advantage that I’ve only ever used it as a single person…so there isn’t that ‘commitment’ issue problem that I’d show the person. But to me it would probably just come up naturally in a conversation. ‘What have you been doing since you became single?’ “Well, I wasn’t ready for anything serious, so I did some casual dating. I’d help them out if needed, etc”. ‘Oh, you were a sugardaddy!’ “Yes, I guess you could call it that.” And on the conversation would go. I actually had a conversation very similar to this in January with someone I dated IRL (committed). It didn’t work out…but not because of ‘the secret’. I guess I look at it that it isn’t something I’m ashamed I’ve done. Interesting to think that for some people it obviously is something that they are ashamed of…

  572. Noob_SD says:

    I have yet to meet someone who has the perspectives of SBs on this blog. Y’all seem to know what this entails, but I keep running into ladies that seem to want to treat this as two extremes: a) regular dating, or b) a lotto or cash machine. The regular daters don’t want to be SBs, but perhaps have been taken advantage of by their past BFs, and are now looking for a new BF with assured income on the side. They bring with them the worst bane of regular dating – playing hard to get. Talk about a time waster! The other extreme forget the”mutual” part in the “mutually beneficial” relationship and are so focused on getting the $$ – it makes backpage look better. I have given out the obligatory $$ for the first meet and greet, paid for lunch. One even brought a broken iphone and was pushing me to buy her a new one – on the first meet! At the very least pretend to get know me!

    I haven’t tried “stealing” or rather “shoplifting the pooty” – maybe I should look into learning how to do that :)

  573. sweetie says:

    Good luck, Spicey!

  574. SugarySpicey says:

    Sweetie – there’s a “tell us what you think about SA” question field on the main screen, if you answer you get put in the rotation, and I don’t think that make it clear that you’ll then become an SA poster child. I’m with you, pretty embarassing.

    Off to my meet up. :)

  575. sweetie says:

    This is for the moderators on SA blog:
    The girls SA features on its main page, are they volunteers or is this random? I’d hate to see my picture up there without my permission. Can somebody please clarify this? Thanks!

  576. Rosie says:

    I think FatiB is quite likable and I personally enjoy the challenges/questions he presents to the blog. I have a feeling underneath his corpulent dubiousness, he’s a really nice guy.

  577. SugarySpicey says:

    Fati – Can I motorboat your feelings when I honk your moobs?

  578. FatBastardSD says:

    @DianaSBinOC, @*Spicey

    That was uncalled for. I may be fat, I may be a bastard, but I am still a person with real feelings…

  579. SugarySpicey says:

    Diana – there’s no accounting for taste!

  580. DianaSBinOC says:

    “reads these boards, and likes FatiB.”

    Wow he likes FatBastard? Say it isn’t so!

  581. SugarySpicey says:

    Thanks Beachy, I could not possibly look less cute today :( I think I’m the only person on earth who looks bad with a tan! Damn my paleness!

  582. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars 😀

    There are Many people that lurk on here. We should all be a bit more prudent.

    Spicey~ good luck tonight.

  583. Lo says:

    spicey I sent you an email…

  584. SugarySpicey says:

    Jersey – the man I’m meeting tonight who, after a week of quite a bit of texting confessed that he reads these boards, and likes FatiB. I think it wasn’t nice of him not to disclose that he had read all my sugar thoughts, sooner.

  585. Jersey Darling says:

    @Spicey, who is this Dr. Lurker you keep mentioning? In afraid it’s lost on the rest of us.

  586. SugarySpicey says:

    Hey Diana –

    Thanks!

    Meeting someone tonight, it is definitely not what I’m typically drawn to in this site. and more something like what I’d attract IRL if I were willing to consider something IRL, which is far too scary to me.

    I mean you Dr. Lurker, who I’m still mad at BTW.

  587. DianaSBinOC says:

    Wow I didn’t mean to write that much. I started earlier this morning (3:20am) and then kept coming back to add a bit more. Sorry for that eyesore of a post.

    An edit button would be nice. lol

  588. DianaSBinOC says:

    Yes I’m up at a weird hour in the morning..

    “FatiB – It may also be that the friend finds it unappealing to pursue arrangements with men who offer allowances that are similar to what one gives a Backpage escort. I know we’ve hashed this out repeatedly, but whether its “unrealistic expectations” or “delusions of grandeur” for some women it just isn’t sexy to be treated like a call girl.”

    I agree with this as well. Obviously if he wants a backpage escort he can easily find one. He pays his half hour or hour rate and then goes on about his business when his time is up. What’s more insulting is not only be offered these amounts but it’s also the fact that this person wants more time.

    So now you’re not even being treated like a backpage escort, you’re being taken for a fool and treated less. This of course coupled with the guy being unattractive with a body that usually isn’t seen in broad daylight , an age gap worthy of a time machine and the fact that all the while he’s probably laughing at how he sees her as just another escort that is too stupid to know what she could really charge.

    How does any of that sound wonderful or lovely? It doesn’t.

    A sugar baby shouldn’t even really look at what escort rates are but if johns are what you’re meeting then it almost proves wise to see exactly what they pay and what they truly seek when they think “mutually beneficial relationship”.

    The reality is if you’re dating closer to your age where real emotions and attraction are present you usually can receive those amounts. A boyfriend will usually give something to help his girlfriend out in times of need or just because he knows if she’s working two jobs she’ll have less time for him. Now if I had a bf that was like “ohh well come over when you’re done working your two jobs” etc then he would be dumped. Or worse “hey sleep with this old guy because I need your half of the rent.” Dropped.

    I’ve seen it a dozen times over. The one girl that dates a guy for love etc and she’s just a time filler until what he really wants comes along and that’s the one that he breaks his neck providing for.

    When I was about 19 I dated older men generally because the men my age didn’t want to stay at work , were usually trying to leave early while I was the one doing overtime and trying to take on extra shifts. They wanted to have more fun which was understandable but their fun wasn’t going to be at my expense. Sure I dated them but the beer parties or really any excuse to drink got old fast.

    Again this was just regular dating. When I realized neither the older men wanted anything serious nor the younger, I just stopped dating. That’s when I later met someone only a few years older than I that wanted similar things in life , wanted me to not have to work so much. He was only 26 .

    This is my point. Did any other guy suggest this? Nope. As with all things in life there are always going to be people that want you to succeed or help you on your journey and there are others that will be in your way or looking to take and not give anything.

    My point is if a boyfriend in his mid 20s can provide some help to his girlfriend, a married 50+ man that obviously has the resources to afford his own lavish lifestyle can do better. If he’s not it’s because he doesn’t want to. That to me says it all.

    That’s my point it’s not because they can’t afford to do more it’s the very thought behind doing less on purpose. That doesn’t even qualify a man to be a sugar daddy. You’re not supposed to be penny pinching through the bowl looking for a discount. Seriously?

    So basically that’s a john looking for a cheap escort. That’s it.

    “$200 twice a month to “go get something nice,” or a shoe shopping trip to Payless Shoes…”? ”

    I did read one sugarbaby blog where another SB was laughing at post from a girl that received $200 twice a month , something like 30 pairs of payless shoes and a fake LV bag worth probably $8. Now of course this younger SB didn’t know she was being laughed at. Imagine how stupid she felt when she tweeted her haul of splenda goodness?

    This is my very point. She actually thought she was living the high life of true sugar status and really wasn’t aware that her splenda daddy was having a laugh at her expense. I’m pretty sure she knows now.

    @Spicey~

    I always feel like I miss what comments you’re posting that are considered cruel or intentionally hurtful.

    Sure not everyone is going to be able to jet around the globe and have funds to make a pit stop in France. There are women that are in dire straits where $200 is the difference between being homeless or going hungry. So I would never made fun of this but I’m fully aware that due to their situation these loser fakes are capitalizing off of their hardships. I think we can all agree on this fact and again I haven’t really seen anything you’ve posted to poke fun at women in these situations.

    I think my next allowance requirement is going to be $17.50 lol. Sorry can’t get over that woman’s face in “It’s A Wonderful Life”. Of course I deeply desire getting down and dirty with Mr. Potter for I’ll give him a spin in his wheelchair that he’ll never forget!

    Btw I just looked at backpage and some of those girls are really beautiful and charge $50-$250 hr tops.

    @ Principium

    “Frankly with the diminishing quality of supply/demand on this site, I don’t regret my decision to abandon the site. There must be abundance elsewhere so I will keep my eyes and ears open.”

    I really think regular dating would be an easier option for you. Sure I understand you’re not seeking the forever+ marriage+ children since you’ve already done that.Your profile would light on fire if you put “sugar daddy seeking sugar baby” on a regular site. Since you’re about to be 50 in a few months I’m not sure if you’re open to a 10 year gap or less mainly women in their 40s. Not only have many done the marriage + children already but in many cases their children are already out of the house. They have the added libido boost and of course aren’t seeking marriage but fun and frolic.

    So.. I did receive a message from a new pot. Ohh and he’s handsome! I’m trying not to be overly excited because I don’t want to get my hopes up. For now I’m looking forward to our next exchange.

  589. lil_tm says:

    “Not sure why it’s so addicting since I’m not part of the bowl any longer. It’s a topic I’ve only ever shared with ONE friend (the one with an SA profile now) and have never discussed with anyone else.”

    I think it’s human nature to want to vent and share experiences, but since this is so touchy of a subject, we don’t have many options for outlets to do so.
    I am grateful to finally have a place to get advice and share experiences and what makes it better is there are actual participants to share with.

    I did tell my very best girlfriend about one potential and even she was sort of judgemental. But I forgive the fact that she married a man for money which allows her to sit at home all day and do nothing to better herself. :/

    As for future boyfriends, no way Jose…I’d never mention something like this to them. It’ll have to be my dirty little secret. 😉

  590. Ynottryit82 says:

    I need help!!!! A guy from here emailed me a day ago asking if I wanted to go shopping. I said yeah, but I’m working. He then said he wanted to put $750 in my checking account since we couldn’t meet. He called me while at the bank and I gave my account number…the cash was in there. I’ve been texting him occasionally then about 6 hours went by and I guess he got mad. Now I receive a text that says he regrets giving me the $. I don’t respond. So now at 2am I get a text that says since I’m not a decent person I need to text him in the morning so he can tell me how to get the $ money back to him. He wants his money back that he willingly put into my account!!!! What do I do? I used the money for bills. Can he go to bank and get it back? He filled out the deposit slip. I’m freaking out because Idk if he’ll go psycho, try and Sue me, go to the bank and try and get it back. Need advice please.

  591. SugarySpicey says:

    Thanks Rosie (and sweetie and Capitol P) all is well is Sugar City! Now if I could just get to sleep!

    Grumble, grumble, pours a glass of wine.

  592. Rosie says:

    @Spicey

    I can totally see now the intent of your original message. I do apologize for being so retaliatory. I don’t have a personal problem with you or anyone else on the blog at all.

    It’s totally your prerogative to choose what kind of arrangement works for you. Same goes for everyone else. It’s another reason I had a hard time understanding the arguments I stumbled upon when I came to the blog. Sure, there are healthy and constructive ways to argue and (hopefully) we find the lesson or achieve some type of growth through having friendly squabbles…then again, who am I kidding? These squabbles are taking place in a very nonconforming (virtual) environment, right? Lol. Can’t say the “sugar world” is ordinary, that’s for sure! :-)

  593. Wosie says:

    @Spicey

    I can totally see now the intent of your original message. I do apologize for being so retaliatory. I don’t have a personal problem with you or anyone else on the blog at all. It’s totally your prerogative to choose what kind of arrangement works for you. Same goes for everyone else. It’s another reason I had a hard time understanding the arguments I stumbled upon when I came to the blog. Sure, there are healthy and constructive ways to argue and (hopefully) we find the lesson or achieve some type of growth through having friendly squabbles…then again, who am I kidding? These squabbles are taking place in a very nonconforming (virtual) environment, right? Lol. Can’t say the “sugar world” is ordinary, that’s for sure! :-)

  594. SugarySpicey says:

    P.S. – you joined the blog at the height of blog drama, and immediately inside a breakup with my past SD. In actuality I am far less acidic than you take me for. Though I really wish this damn blog had an “edit post” tool. Many of my sarcastic jokes which are purely Devil’s Advocate or literary device get lost without the use of sarcasticies punctuation.

  595. SugarySpicey says:

    Well now that phrase doesn’t sound diffusing :)

    FB sometimes thinks SBs have unrealistic expectations, and I was simply trying to share my perspective that although I agreed with your statement that generosity grows over time, I also have a minimum threshold where I like for things to begin (below that threshold I’ll just wait it out until something more interesting comes along). If I’m going to call something an “arrangement” the generosity needs to feel sexy to me, otherwise, it’s just dating.

  596. Rosie says:

    It’s all good, Spicey. As you probably discovered about me by now, I’m one of the first to try and diffuse drama so when I was taken aback by your reply, I just wanted to express that it was your choice of words that rubbed me the wrong way.

  597. SugarySpicey says:

    It was purely a statement about myself Rosie, nothing about you or anyone else intended at all.

  598. sweetie says:

    Rosie, I was on a different SD website for two months, nothing came of it. My impression was that men there were either looking for something serious, or just a hook-up.

  599. Wosie says:

    Wosie-posie-pudding-and-pie,
    kissed the boys and made them cry.

    Just posting with a name change to see how long it takes to get approved. :-)

  600. Rosie says:

    Princi

    Of course I don’t mind Wosie at all! I was thinking about changing my handle here to Wosie, but I changed it once already and was moderated for a full day! A part of my psyche is strongly controlled by my id and can’t wait on the delayed gratification of sharing my thoughts! Lol. 😉

    My first ever SD experience was a man I met IRL. You may have better luck that way with how things seem to be deteriorating on SA. I was never on any other SD sites and haven’t checked out if they have blogs/forums to know if this is something happening across the online sugar board or not. I’m curious to know if it’s true for other sites. Maybe the pendulum has swung and getting back to basics is where it’s at?

  601. Principium says:

    @ Wosie: (I hope you don’t mind it with a W. SDinLA’s post was very funny and I find “Wosie” very endearing 😉 )

    I only had one SB from this site from my past stint. I have met POT SBs who were not completely honest with me. I avoid the ones with BFs and some form of significant other. I guess I never stuck with the site for long enough to give it a longer chance. Frankly with the diminishing quality of supply/demand on this site, I don’t regret my decision to abandon the site. There must be abundance elsewhere so I will keep my eyes and ears open.

  602. Rosie says:

    @Princi

    Not sure why you don’t have an SB. You seem to be a great catch for a girl seeking an arrangement!

    @sweetie & Princi

    Ok, I see. Thanks. Wasn’t trying to bring out the claws, but some of Spicey’s posts have been quite coarse to others so I took her response to me as being another not-so-nicey Spicey moment.

  603. sweetie says:

    P, that’s completely reasonable. You’re one of the good ones :) We appreciate your experience and kind words in this matter.

  604. Principium says:

    @ Wosie: I think that Spicey’s inspired words may have come from actual life experiences. I had 2 different girls telling me that they were offered $200 “shopping sprees” at Target & Walmart and one girl from the past actually told me that she wanted a man who’d take her to Costco to fully fill up her refrigerator once a month, take her car for oil changes, tire rotation and break inspection. These type of characters do exist!

  605. sweetie says:

    Rosie “In responding to my post, why would you choose to assume I meant “$200 twice a month to “go get something nice,” or a shoe shopping trip to Payless Shoes…”?

    I think she meant that as an example of what would irk her in the allowance department, not directed at you, specifically. Spicey has stated many times before she expects a certain amount, be it allowance/gifts/whatever, and any less than her expectance is a big turn-off.

  606. Principium says:

    Forgot to mention that when it comes to intimacy, I was hoping that in this paradigm we can be more evolved and experience one another without the stigma of being judged and the inevitable jealousy that at times ensues in traditional when lines get crossed. For me ultimately, if an SB is not into me from the moment of setting eyes on me and my only compensating quality becomes my wallet (vis a vis allowance) then no matter hot or what not she may be, I’ll seek one hotter than the previous one who happens to be actually into me.

  607. Rosie says:

    @Spicey

    I think I’ve discovered why you rub some people the wrong way. Your choice of words can come across as way too abrasive (pretty sure you already know this though). In responding to my post, why would you choose to assume I meant “$200 twice a month to “go get something nice,” or a shoe shopping trip to Payless Shoes…”? Unless that specific comment was meant to be a passive-aggressive slap to another SB on the blog and I missed that convo, I just don’t understand why you would even be so haughty in your choice of words. I can see that’s your personality, but then you shouldn’t be surprised when others may be nasty back to you.

    Also, I totally get it what you’re sharing about your past SD. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with being prepared to make sure your juices are flowing for the right time and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with attraction evolving from the inside out.

  608. Principium says:

    @ Wosie: Although I am unattached, I am only partially available on the emotional plane. I know myself and I do know that at the present time I can neither offer myself in totality of one package encompassing emotional, financial, mental and physical components which I deem as being necessary to form a strong foundation for a real relationship.

    – Emotionally, not over my past relationships so some damaged goods scenario
    – Financially, kid in college
    – Mentally, I’m still child-like at times (pushing 50, wondering if I’ll ever grow up!)
    – Physically, HOTT (:D shameless advertising is my thang!)

    But I am never opposed to exploring the path that this method may lead me to! A man who does not take risks and does not accept the possibility of enduring some pain in exchange for an abundance of blissfulness and pleasure, is not a very high value man. To address Sweetie’s earlier point, I have no problem being with someone younger than me in public while displaying affection and chivalry. I can not speak for the attached and married SDs, but I can speak for me. I like to start off slow and explore all the great possibilities with a suitor, with the exception of marriage (failed twice, I bat 0-2 and will def strike out if foolish enough again) and any further off springs. I just want Princi space to be respected as I will also totally respect her space. I do believe that some absence makes the heart grow fonder, but at the same time, too much absence makes most hearts wander 😉

  609. SugarySpicey says:

    True Rosie, with time comes generosity on both parts. But (and maybe I’m wired differently) the thought of having sexual relations with a guy who then gave me $200 twice a month to “go get something nice,” or who wanted to “spoil me” with a shoe shopping trip to Payless Shoes would make me want to just say, “No thank you.” At which point, if there’s no sugar, it either becomes dating, or it becomes nothing. I don’t do “booty call.” I have a minimum threshold that I psychologically can’t get past, regardless of the ellusive “chemistry.”

    I did not find my last SD physically attractive. He could have been, but he he wore tighty whities (which no man should wear after age 8) and had bad posture that made him look wimpy and shorter than me (and I am really! short). But, he absolutely adored me, and he was really good in bed, so the sex was great. I genuinely wanted to have sex with him every time I saw him. But, he would never turn my head if he hadn’t been so sweet. Even when I’m super excited about someone IRL nerves can keep the juices from flowing – not always, and maybe that’s just me – but I’d rather be prepared than disappointed.

  610. Rosie says:

    Yes, sweetie! IRL, but not so real. 😉 Arrangements (sugar daddy dating, whatever you choose to call it) should enhance your lifestyle, allow you to enjoy the finer things, advance your goals and bring everyone lotsa fun…

  611. sweetie says:

    I think the generosity you mention makes sense, Rosie. It’s just like IRL.

  612. Rosie says:

    When I say “give more”, I don’t just mean allowance. But you want to make sure she’s happy and doing well in other areas of her life. OR…you may want to give her gifts or a luxury item she wouldn’t buy for herself.

  613. Rosie says:

    “I wish a less than generous offer didn’t turn me off…” -Spicey

    In long-term arrangements, I found the more the “relationship” developed, the more genuinely generous the SD became. In bed and otherwise. The progression makes sense to me because we’re real women interacting with real men, not robots. The more you get to know someone, the more you care about their happiness – even if you know things aren’t forever. Blog SDs, please chime in and tell me if I’m wrong here, but in your past (or current) arrangements, do you find you are willing and want to give more to your SB than what the original arrangement agreement was after you’ve been with her awhile?

  614. sweetie says:

    Spicey @ Rosie: as always, a genuine question about nerves devolved into silliness, so you may have read a flippant remark about revulsion, but that isn’t where it started.

    Yeah, we got lost in translation. Still, Spicey, if the SB was completely happy with the SD, she should not have a problem having sex with him. I get the feeling that the SBs are only slightly interested in their SDs, and the money is the driving force for the SBs to bed their SDs. And the allowance being unsatisfactory makes for an even more dissatisfied SB.

  615. sweetie says:

    If the SD repulses the SB, then she should not be with him no matter how much money he’s gifting her. If she likes him, that’s perfect, and money should not be the incentive.

  616. SugarySpicey says:

    True Fati: He should be kind, and generous, and give orgasms, and fly at the speed of light to change the orbit of the earth. Is that unrealistic?

    I wish a less than generous offer didn’t turn me off, and that any old gift would do. But, that would just be dating, and when I give my heart I sure as hell ain’t NSA, and then I expect the Economist all to myself.

    Rosie: as always, a genuine question about nerves devolved into silliness, so you may have read a flippant remark about revulsion, but that isn’t where it started.

  617. FatBastardSD says:

    @Rosie

    I am quite sure there have been discussions on sleeping with a SD whom the SB finds unattractive. I am not accusing Spicey of this though.

  618. Rosie says:

    @Spicey

    Oh, ok. I think maybe one or two of the blog SDs interpreted the conversation in that way and used those exact words. (I do remember reading the word repulsed…but maybe I’m getting that confused with a story from the NYT that I read the same day? 😉 )

  619. FatBastardSD says:

    @SugarySpicey

    It might never be resolved. I still cannot understand how the monetary amount seems to dictates the treatment you expect the SD to give.

    If a SD offers a Backpage allowance and treats the SB great it’s an insult. Triple the allowance and you have yourself a true SD, never mind the fact you will be in the emergency room getting treatment for your torn vagina.

  620. SugarySpicey says:

    Rosie – We weren’t talking about how to have sex with someone who repulsed us, we were talking about how to ensure first time sex went well when nerves were high.

  621. Rosie says:

    @Beach_Girl

    Hello! I can’t seem to stay away. I was out of the country on business and wow, missed a lot on here, but jumped right back on when I returned. Not sure why it’s so addicting since I’m not part of the bowl any longer. It’s a topic I’ve only ever shared with ONE friend (the one with an SA profile now) and have never discussed with anyone else. (Current BF knows I’ve had older generous BFs in the past, but he doesn’t know all the details and that they were through arrangements. We both agree talking about the past does no one any good whatsoever! :-) )

    @sweetie

    Yes, I agree fully. If a girl agrees to the “x” amount per visit in a hotel room (P4P) and is comfortable with it, that’s all on her.

    @FatBastard

    There most certainly is a risk in waiting for the ‘chemistry-fueled’ arrangement. I think realistically that one may be a bit tougher for women. But it doesn’t have to be the “over-the-top I want to rip your clothes off and climb on top of you right now” type of chemistry. I guess the best way to describe it is it’s someone you could be great friends with, laugh with and sleep with, but they aren’t your future. You have light fun together, make life easier for one another and you aren’t repulsed by them (and this comes up only because I’m pretty sure I read in a much older post the girls discussing how to have sex with someone that repulses them). To be honest, (and I’ve told her this), I think my girlfriend is just really uncomfortable in general with arrangements and I’m not sure she’s cut out for it. She recently had a bad breakup and doesn’t want an emotional attachment of any sort. She hates her job but can’t afford to leave until she has some real funds saved up, but she’s always had a hard time asking anyone for help. It seemed an arrangement approach would be perfect for her, but not sure it is now. To answer your question, I think it may be a little bit of YES to both. The pool has been polluted (on the SD & SB side) and she possibly went into the whole thing with expectations based on MY past positive experiences.

  622. FatBastardSD says:

    @lil_tm

    “If a silly blog is so intense with just word posts, I can imagine how stressful a real life encounter must be with some of you.”

    Oh yeah, a real life encounter with with me would be really intense…I promise… :-).

  623. SugarySpicey says:

    FatiB – It may also be that the friend finds it unappealing to pursue arrangements with men who offer allowances that are similar to what one gives a Backpage escort. I know we’ve hashed this out repeatedly, but whether its “unrealistic expectations” or “delusions of grandeur” for some women it just isn’t sexy to be treated like a call girl.

  624. sweetie says:

    BG, you got mail 😉

  625. Supermommie says:

    What is P4P and NSA? I am a newbie. :)

  626. Beach_Girl says:

    Sweetie~ Email sent 😀

  627. sweetie says:

    Great, BG. 1 dot lisa dot zee at gmail
    Can’t wait to chat with you!

  628. Beach_Girl says:

    Sweetie~ No, but I might be headed your way soon 😀

  629. FatBastardSD says:

    @Rosie

    I believe that many SB’s are still approaching arrangements in the manner you describe. I can say this from reading SB profiles. These SB’s take the risk of developing real feelings for their SD’s who may not be able to reciprocate. Many SB’s chose money over chemistry though, and these are the ones who can be “tricked into having sex”, but that is the risk they take with their approach to arrangements.

    You state that your friend is having a hard time. Is it because the SD quality has gone down or could it be that your friend may also have unrealistic expectations?

  630. sweetie says:

    Sure thing, BG. You in FL as well?

  631. Beach_Girl says:

    Sweetie~ Nice, We should chat off blog soon 😀

  632. lil_tm says:

    “The sugar bowl is a jungle now, and most of the monkeys are actually snakes.”

    This dicussion is truly getting tiresome for me, so I’m going to bow out now, but before I do..

    Spicey..I believe it is fair to say that, yes, there are snakes on this site.
    I don’t believe it’s as bad as is being portrayed.
    In the case of Rosies friend..she probably was turned off at the emails she was getting for P4P offers and I felt that way too at one point BEFORE I was approached by a true SD. Then, you realize that they are out there, but like with anything, you have to weed through the B.S.

    If something seems suspect, don’t even give it your time.
    If a young woman is fooled that easily, there is problem with her judgement and she shouldn’t be here or she was selling something that wasn’t true herself and the man got upset.
    If a man says he is going to give a certain amount but gives less, the girl shouldn’t have been there in the first place OR maybe the guy felt unsatisifed about what he expeceted as opposed to what he received.

    As one of the Chefs I trained under put it, “Use your best judgement”

    And if your judgement sucks and you trip and fall flat on your face, you either move on and out or you learn from your mistake and stick to whatever it is you’re trying to accomplish.

    If a silly blog is so intense with just word posts, I can imagine how stressful a real life encounter must be with some of you. 😉

    Goodnight!

  633. sweetie says:

    Beach_Girl, I’m in sunny Florida. Good evening to you, too! :)

  634. SugarySpicey says:

    Rosie – I’ve also met amazing people! It’s just a much bigger sludge pile, and harder to sort through than it should be.

  635. SugarySpicey says:

    Fati – I’m trying now! At first I believed you meant your comments about being sexually cruel. Since realizing that you were in fact a vagitatius I believe I’ve been much nicer to you. I think I even invited you to spank me and posted itty bitty booty shorts for your viewing pleasure. Have you provided similar blog generosity? I’ve had two very bad SA experiences. I’ve shared one. I’m not ready to talk about the other more than to say: I was really naive once upon a time, not that long ago.

  636. Rosie says:

    “Rosie: Unfortunately, the site is so full of fakes (as in men who assume identities of someone else when they are in fact a used Kia* salesman – married, obese, father of eight) that your experience has probably expired. The sugar bowl is a jungle now, and most of the monkeys are actually snakes.” -Spicey

    That’s really unfortunate. :-( And I’m sure on the flip side, there are unsavory women on the site as well. A lot of pollution all around! I still would like to believe there are good guys and good girls on SA (and ones to be met IRL). Each person just needs to be very clear with their communication, set their own boundaries (stick with it) and be REAL.

  637. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars

    Trader J~ too bad you aren’t here anymore, you added a lot to the blog 😀 Hope things are going well with your new SB…

    Rosie~ Totally agree, arrangements should be easy and fun. Honest and up front. It’s not always the case anymore, but there are many that still understand how this works. Glad you are still around 😀

    Sweetie~ Where are you at? sorry, can’t remember 😀

  638. FatBastardSD says:

    @lil_tm

    Well that is a real complaint in my book. To be fair Spicey’s situation of being shortchanged is also a bad experience which was magnified to the point of being absurd.

    @Spicey

    “…Thanks. I kept getting annoyed in the past that people were misinterpreting MY jokes while allowing Fati all sorts of latitude…”

    Really? I would like all of the SB’s on the blog who have treated me with kindness from me very first post:

    Spicey, Madrista, LookingGlassSB, and I save the best for last DianaSBinOC (luv u babe).

  639. SugarySpicey says:

    Rosie: Unfortunately, the site is so full of fakes (as in men who assume identities of someone else when they are in fact a used Kia* salesman – married, obese, father of eight) that your experience has probably expired. The sugar bowl is a jungle now, and most of the monkeys are actually snakes.

    *No judgement towards Kia, just not who he said he was when giving his name, photos, and intentions.

  640. sweetie says:

    Rosie “It’s supposed to be easy and fun! Like a real relationship in a way. The difference is, everything is just accelerated and there’s no fear or pressure of happily ever after. I mean, most BFs IRL want to help out their GFs after they’ve been dating a bit, but it doesn’t happen until they are well on their way to being seriously committed. And vice versa if the GF is better off. Right? In arrangements, that “help” happens a lot more quickly without the “serious” part and thoughts of wedding bells and what are we going to name our babies?”

    Totally agree.

  641. SugarySpicey says:

    I am going to say some things which may be unpopular (news flash!):

    I believe an SB should only accept money/lavish gifts/ travel once she’s ready to accept cock with eager enthusiasm.

    I believe an SB should be willing to travel when reasonable, and she should be delightful to be with during the entire trip.

    I think asking for an allowance for two months, or a first date gift, while you warm up to the idea of sex is tacky.

    I think an SD asking for two months of dating and some “sample sex before showing generosity is tacky.

    I think guys or girks who really want marriage and have no intention of generosity (financial or sexual) before long term monogamy are on the wrong site.

    I think men who lie about their generosity are creeps.

    I think women who lie about their sexual generosity are … (Words fail me, but I don’t like you girls either).

  642. Rosie says:

    “I think either people are exaggerating or they have really bad judgement. If that’s the case, they don’t belong here.” -lil_tm

    Agree with you on the bad judgement part. I’m still baffled by the “tricked into having sex” comment from earlier. I’m not sure when things shifted in to being so difficult in the arrangement world. Then again, I’ve been out of “the bowl” for a bit. All of these arguments just didn’t seem to exist before. Or maybe I just got lucky? I don’t know.

    Before…it was pretty simple. You set up a profile. You meet pots. You find one you have chemistry with. You get to know each other. You make sure you’re on the same page with what you’re seeking. If you aren’t on the same page, you move on to the next date or you decide you like the person enough, that you are willing to adjust to meet both of your needs. And so on and so forth.

    It’s supposed to be easy and fun! Like a real relationship in a way. The difference is, everything is just accelerated and there’s no fear or pressure of happily ever after. I mean, most BFs IRL want to help out their GFs after they’ve been dating a bit, but it doesn’t happen until they are well on their way to being seriously committed. And vice versa if the GF is better off. Right? In arrangements, that “help” happens a lot more quickly without the “serious” part and thoughts of wedding bells and what are we going to name our babies?

    When did it turn into entitlement and drama? :roll:

  643. FatBastardSD says:

    Well lets take a look at Allie’s post. I can only assume that this is an example of a bad experience with a SD. If I am wrong I hope she will correct me.

    The SD had an allowance figure and during a talk he explained what he expected from that allowance and that he also wanted sex right away (she did not mention if the allowance started right away though). Clearly this is an example of a bad SD because his allowance does not match his SB expectations.

    “There are guys offering me a more relationship based thing with an allowance,,, I’m all about the $ so it’s easier to just get it done”

    These are the complaints that POT SB’s have given me regarding the SD’s they have met IRL (after screening the perverts who send cock pictures):

    The SD’s they met where looking for a GF or a wife.
    The SD’s they met wanted to travel with the SB’s.
    The SD’s wanted sex to be included in the relationship.

    I suppose the third one would be interpreted as P4P by some but the other two?
    I invite others to provide their own experience.

  644. sweetie says:

    Rosie “Just to clarify on what I shared. When I say P4P, I am speaking purely of men that will flat out write, “I would like to meet with you “x” amount of times in a hotel room and “x” is my offer for each of our visits.” That, to me, is the epitome of P4P.”

    And this is something to consider carefully if to accept it or not. If SB is fine with it, great, if not, don’t agree to it and then feel like a piece of meat.

  645. sweetie says:

    Spicey “Do I wish after hitting submit that I had the ability to edit posts I may have made on grumpy nights while going through a frustrating breakup? Sure Do!”

    We can’t edit everything nor should we. It’s enough that we sit in front of a screen and attempt to carefully type what we mean… It’s never the same as what I might actually say, because it’s not spontaneous. So, I think typing it’s plenty of censorship and sadly, words still get misunderstood.

  646. Rosie says:

    “Rosie has commented that her friend has noticed the proliferation of P4P SD’s on the site. Other SB’s have commented on this as well. I am not convinced that this is actually true because I have been accused of wanting P4P when this was not the case. -FatBastard

    Just to clarify on what I shared. When I say P4P, I am speaking purely of men that will flat out write, “I would like to meet with you “x” amount of times in a hotel room and “x” is my offer for each of our visits.” That, to me, is the epitome of P4P.

  647. SugarySpicey says:

    Allie: Thanks. I kept getting annoyed in the past that people were misinterpreting MY jokes while allowing Fati all sorts of latitude. But, then I remembered the key to writing: context is everything, and women’s humor is default viewed as a little bitchy if not cushioned with self depreciation (think of any successful female comics).

    Some on the blog have read my past posts (which were just as nonsense as what Fati spews) my humor is misinterpreted – poor, poor me. So, I stepped back and got real.

    Do I think I’m pretty amazing? Yep! And I hope everyone else in the world does too, the universe is too harsh if we aren’t at least our own cheerleaders.

    Do I think $100 on the nightstand is gross? Yep, pretty unapologetically so. But, if it makes YOU happy, that’s awesome, I only think it’s gross for me – I don’t judge for you because I don’t know “you”.

    Do I wish after hitting submit that I had the ability to edit posts I may have made on grumpy nights while going through a frustrating breakup? Sure Do!

    Am I trying to move on and turn a new leaf? Yes, and I appreciate those darling dears who’ve let me.

    Will I say bitchy things in the future? Sure will!

  648. lil_tm says:

    “So I call on the SB’s here who have had these bad experiences with SD to tell us the details, tell us what you did wrong and what you would do differently. This would give a new SB some forewarning of the dangers she will face when she is negotiating an arrangement.”

    I have only had one experience that left a bad taste in my mouth. Ummm..ok, maybe not the greatest choice of words.
    I met a potSD at a restaurant for dinner and he told me then that he was actually looking for a long term gf. Due to the nature of this site and the fact that we had just met, it rubbed me the wrong way.
    When he walked me to my car, he kissed me and started to rub his hard dingaling against my leg.
    SO, although I think it is blatantly obvious, this was a warning sign to me because
    1. he said he was looking for a serious gf
    BUT
    2. he was treating me like someone he wanted to sleep with immediately by rubbing himself on me and asking me to go to his place.
    I go in my car and drove home and never answered his calls again.

    Truly, this is common sense to me.

    I don’t even see what the big deal is here. Are this many people truly having bad experiences that this is such a sensitive subject?
    I think either people are exaggerating or they have really bad judgement. If that’s the case, they don’t belong here.

  649. lil_tm says:

    “@lil_tm
    It’s all about perception isn’t it. Maybe she was nervous and if I would have met her on another day I would have been blown away by how great she was.”

    Or maybe she was just another slab of concrete, haha.
    My pot asked to be on my facebook and I allowed him to, so in all honesty, he had an idea what kind of person I am.
    It was my own sillyness. Everything that is new and unfamiliar is not only exciting, but is also scary until I get comforable and that just happened to be one of those experiences.,

    “The first meet is like a blind date, you get about 1 hour to decide how you like the person. I mean a lot of people spend more time comparison shopping for a laptop yet going out on a few dates is a waste of time. Seems crazy to me but then again the divorce rates seem to suggest people know how to find the right mate”

    And that’s why everyone should go into it without any expectations. At worst, you don’t hit it off and you go home and catch a late night movie.
    At best, you have a friend for life.

  650. sweetie says:

    Damn war zone in here! Everybody just decide what you’re willing to do: pay for sex, be paid for sex, have a relationship with the allowance being secondary, or whatever it is that you want. Be clear about it and don’t compromise if whatever you hear it’s not up to your liking. And don’t be so desperate that you agree to anything because you have to. That’s not a good start!

    Now for the SDs here, are you paying for sex or are you paying because you’d like your SB to not struggle with daily expenses? Also, how much affection do you have for her? Do you care for her or do you only care to fuck her?

  651. SugarySpicey says:

    Frank – you’re right. We all make mistakes. I jumped in the sugar bowl too naive. Until that point I had the luxury of only having been lied to about little, inconsequential things, but never blatantly deceived before. I was taken advantage of because I (as perfect, hot, and superior as I think I am) I assumed that the sugar bowl was something that it isn’t. I was stupid, and silly, and full of ridiculous Cinderella fantasies based on a very small IRL data point.

    My naive Polyanna Quest: A nice, successful, guy who likes making my eyes light up by treating me like a Princess. In return, I make his eyes light up by satisfying his every fantasy.

    I didn’t realize all of this needed to be negotiated up front, that people would assume the identity of their boss so that when you Googled them their story would add up, or that so many women behaved so poorly on this site that people would be steel-guarded against each other.

    To be perfectly candid: this is my only experience with “online dating” as I was in a long term relationship and missed the whole Match.com experience, and I was not properly prepared for what I encountered.

  652. Principium says:

    Trader, it is great to hear from you and hope that all is well.

    I realized that with all the toxicity in the atmosphere, it is very difficult to breath both on SA the site and SA the blog. Quite frankly if any SD or SB lurks on here whether in stealth mode or active participant, it makes it next to impossible to have a healthy attitude on the arrangement side of this site.

    I personally cashed out all my chips and bailed out of this type of Sugar. Ironically, my previous SB from this very site is back on the scene and one year removed, we both feel that we actually had a connection worth pursuing, despite our own personal faults and quirks.

    FWIW, Spicey and I debated the “stealing” vs swindling and with reference to the “light envelop” scenario, I can see her point and deliberately short changing someone is a very crass and scoundrel act. Putting cash in an envelop and leaving it by the night stand is a world which I sped and pulled away from (and have made no secrets about it) so if it has come to that in the online SD/SB dynamics whereby SBs are mentored to count their cash, then that would be my cue to also abandon this lifestyle altogether.

    Dignity >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Pu**y

  653. Allie says:

    @ sugary spicy nicely put!

  654. Allie says:

    Ok how about this experience. A SD had his allowance to 3-5 G’s after talkig to him he said he expected s-e-x on the first date, and that the average rate was 300/night and since I wanted 3000 a month than it would be ten visits a month..

  655. Allie says:

    I agree with trader j but as a new sb on the site I don’t know how else to do this than p4p.. ?? Confusing! There are guys offering me a more relationship based thing with an allowance,,, I’m all about the $ so it’s easier to just get it done

  656. Frank says:

    If what is really wanted is for the SB’s of the world to stop being taken advantage by the mean SD’s of the world, then tell your real world experiences.

    Some time ago, I related my bad experience with a SB, in the process showing what a fool I can be sometimes. I was rewarded with lots of good advice on how I could have prevented the bad experience. And I would guess any SD reading that blog would learn from my misadventure.

    So I call on the SB’s here who have had these bad experiences with SD to tell us the details, tell us what you did wrong and what you would do differently. This would give a new SB some forewarning of the dangers she will face when she is negotiating an arrangement.

  657. FatBastardSD says:

    @lil_tm

    It’s all about perception isn’t it. Maybe she was nervous and if I would have met her on another day I would have been blown away by how great she was.

    The first meet is like a blind date, you get about 1 hour to decide how you like the person. I mean a lot of people spend more time comparison shopping for a laptop yet going out on a few dates is a waste of time. Seems crazy to me but then again the divorce rates seem to suggest people know how to find the right mate :-).

  658. SugarySpicey says:

    Wow! Trader. I won’t bore everyone by replying with a point by point refutation, but clearly you read my posts and see the worst possible interpretation. As, clearly I have read yours and seen the worst.

    Neither of us gives the other the benefit of doubt, nor can we read comments for the hyperbole with which they’re said. Apparently, I’ve misunderstood statements you’ve made. Hopefully, you can see that quite possibly you’ve misread mine – just as much as I’ve misread yours.

    I’m not going to fight with you. I will endeavor to be more precise in the future. Miscommunication is a two-way street. Clearly, we have a gross, and unmendable, miscommunication.

  659. TraderJ says:

    @Spicey – Again you continue to prove you are not remotely as smart as you say, but clearly are as nasty as some claim you are.

    The ONE and ONLY thing I claimed YOU said was that whole stealing bullshit, which is exactly that BULLSHIT.. look up the meaning of the word theft. NOTHING else in my post was stated as coming from you.

    My expectations are as far from one sided as possible… how you come up with that is once again just you being you and lashing as you are so prone to do.

    I am selfish? Hahahahahaha why don’t you open up a great big can of STFU… ask my two previous SB one for 14 months the other for 18 months how selfish I am. The answer will be are you totally crazy?????????

    I knew I would get sucked back in to replying as I knew you would be your typical horrible self taking all your little digs for things that weren’t even associated with you.

    Trust me Fatty is not the only one that sees completely through your complete and utter nonsense on this blog and anywhere else you wish to verbally vomit.

    Now run along and go tell everybody how hot you are and how sexy you are and how perfect you are blah blah blah… god… you are so full of yourself its amazing and yet for the life of me I can’t figure out why.

    “Trader J, I don’t like it do you have decided to associate with me every possible bad act one could attribute to an SB.”

    NOBODY did so… grow up.

  660. SugarySpicey says:

    J – I am not sure why anyone would ever agree to your one-sided expectations. But, apparently, they do on occasion. But, I have never said that that equates to P4P – you are a boyfriend (a selfish one, but a boyfriend) not an SD. But, you found an ass for your saddle, so good for you! But do not put words in my mouth that I have never said.

    For the record: let me say again, I think it is tacky to demand an allowance, or a gift, or a payment, or whatever the hell you want to call it for a 1st meet.

    However, if you are inexperienced with this type of arrangement, I think it is wise not to have sex until you have received whatever it was that you were seeking out an arrangement. To me that should be a matter cleared up in a number of days, not a number of months. But we’ve already established that I am kind of a slut who likes to hop in bed quickly.

    Trader J, I don’t like it do you have decided to associate with me every possible bad act one could attribute to an SB. I am actually far more fair and balanced than you give me credit for.

  661. lil_tm says:

    “@lil_tm
    Let me tell you there was one SB who would loose to a real doll in a personality contest…
    Not all women are real SB’s! As I have been messaged by transsexuaIs/transvestites I suppose I could say that not all SB’s are real women as well. I consider a true SB a special breed of woman. Smart, beautiful, talented and willing to overlook my outside shell to see my inner beauty”

    Well, that is probably what my first pot thought of me. I was nervous I couldn’t get ahold of myself.
    But yea, hanging out with someone with the personality of a slab of concrete is never fun. ;/

  662. SugarySpicey says:

    Trader – you misunderstand me entirely! I had never been ones who believes that a girl should be compensated for dinner or drinks or a lovely evening out on the town. That is dating.

    I do believe that if a man says that he is going to provide a certain something, he should provide that certain something that he has committed to providing. I also believe that if a woman has committed to providing a certain something, she should provide that certain something, that she has committed to providing.

    You sir, are looking today exclusively on your terms

  663. FatBastardSD says:

    @lil_tm

    Let me tell you there was one SB who would loose to a real doll in a personality contest…

    Not all women are real SB’s! As I have been messaged by transsexuaIs/transvestites I suppose I could say that not all SB’s are real women as well. I consider a true SB a special breed of woman. Smart, beautiful, talented 😉 and willing to overlook my outside shell to see my inner beauty.

  664. SugarySpicey says:

    People … People who scam people … are the sleaziest people, in the world.

    Gtt – do you consider dinner and a night at a play ought to get you action? Or is that in addition to a discussion and an allowance? For me, dinner and a night at a play is a date. First dates get hugs.

  665. TraderJ says:

    UGH.. I promise this is my last visit, the nonsense being spewed in this thread is almost making my physically ill. I have kept in contact with a few people from the blog and as such I was made aware of not only the nonsense in the OP, but also the amazingly moronic comments made by some that have followed.

    Nobody doing what Spicey is talking about is “stealing” anything. Please for someone that is so educated and writes for her living you would think you would take extra care to use the correct terminology. It’s not semantics at all, it’s a totally different thing. Theft legally speaking is when personal property is taken without consent, you can’t really believe having sex with someone under false pretenses is “taking personal property” (feel free to take your shot at me from that glass house of yours)

    The whole reason I first posted on this blog was because I was shocked at how horrible so much of the advice given out by “many” of the resident SB was. Fearing it would lead to exactly what appears to be happening, there is an accepted understanding on this blog that anything a SB says is gospel and anything a SD says is an over reaction or some such thing.

    Fatbastard – 100% right nailed it on the head. I have been told MANY times MANY MANY times when I had an active SA account that I was looking for P4P by SB if I would not just agree to whatever they said. That is because they have been lead to have totally unrealistic and totally false ideas as to what the term “mutually” beneficial means. To them (and I understand why reading this blog sometimes) it means they get whatever they want, when they want it and if a POT SD doesn’t like he’s a fake or creep or whatever.

    The overwhelming vast majority of POT SB I spoke to while on SA wanted me to PAY them to be their friend, before even meeting. They said many times that IF they felt comfortable there might be sex involved down the road but they can’t promise that. BUT while we determined that I would be expected to pay them an allowance. Please explain to me how that is mutually beneficial?

    When I explain that doesn’t work for me, they scream, rant and rave and say I just want an escort and I’m looking for P4P which is 100% false. But they have now been conditioned to believe that they can get away with this nonsense.

    I would ask them what they felt was a fair allowance, whatever number they gave me I would tell them I would give them 1/4 of that while we were “getting to know each” other. I have plenty of family, friends, employees etc.. I don’t need to pay someone to hang out with me for a couple days a month. The second I offer them ANYTHING less than what they deem their friendship is worth I am a cheap bastard and trying to cheat them.

    Just like the previous nonsense about telling girls how to price their time out. Take this number by that number and multiply that the other number and that’s what I want. Ummmm guess what, I am paying whether you want to call it allowance or salary or any other term, I will offer you what the time YOU spend with me is worth TO ME. Not the other way around. I am paying the bills remember? You can have any expectation you want that’s up to you but that is what YOU think your time is worth, but unless someone is willing to pay that it’s not. That does not make the SD wrong or cheap or anything else other than telling YOU what YOUR time is worth to him. If you don’t like it move on. But to claim he is cheap or fake etc..etc.. is just, well it’s childish. Which is what the overwhelming majority of the SB on SA currently are.

    Amazing that people are wondering why the average arrangement is down to a few months in length, it’s seems pretty clear to me why.

    Before you jump down my throat I am NOT saying that there are not fake, creepy whatever SD on this or any other site. I am simply saying you are either blind or a complete fool if you don’t see there are just as many (if not more) SB playing the same and worse games. It’s not one sided but you would never know that reading this blog.

    I am not going to post to any replies, so of course its your right to post them but if you are asking me direct questions they won’t get answered from me. I so enjoyed the last couple of weeks away from all this nonsense and back away I go. I can only say that there are a number of posters that keep talking about how bad the SD/SB scene is getting oddly enough many of those same people need only look in the mirror to see one of the causes…

    Stepping down off my soapbox now and grateful to have no more dealings with the barracudas on SA. Fatty and CapitalP keep up the good fight, you are far far braver men than I.

  666. lil_tm says:

    “They have Whole Foods in Hillbilly land?”
    Yep, and it’s filled with dirty hippies. :)
    btw..why would you have the impression that NoLa is hillbilly??

    “This has nothing to do with a battle of the sexes. WCSD brought up some common “scams” fake SB’s use. I have been messaged by many fake SB’s myself and even met a few. I am sure every SD has the same experiences. We just have to deal with it but if a SD posted that these SB’s should be burned at the stake don’t you think that would be a bit silly?”

    Just curious..how do you meet a fake SB? When you show up , is a real doll sitting at the table holding out an empty envelope or something?

  667. gtt_envy says:

    P4P may be real and girls could infer that in what I offer. I’m only looking for 1-2 dates a month, but I also expect the arrangement to start immediately too or at least now I do.

    I took a young woman to dinner, drinks, to see Wicked, and she fully expected our talked about allowance that night with little more than a hug goodnight. If there are more guys looking to give paltry amount for a single night filled with one sided ecstasy I’ll counter and say there are more woman wanting a allowance for just being by your side. Of course many say I just need time. Well like California_sb said “Panties drop when you have the money” seems the new college SB wants a few months allowance first before she will feel comfortable. Even then its debatable.

    Maybe I’m more of a hobbyist then I think idk.

  668. FatBastardSD says:

    @DianaSBinOC

    “No they aren’t guilting you , they are actually saying ” find an escort”.”

    So they are just trying to help me out with some friendly advise? No they are trying to be bitchy because they did not get what they want. A common trait among women.

    I have actually given some information on my own arrangement. I am curious about your own personal experiences with the site. What type of arrangement are you looking for? What offers do you get and what type of arrangement have you had? In what ways have you been taken advantage of by a SD?

  669. Principium says:

    @ FB: touche! I have some stories of my own but I will not kiss and tell. Many SBs on this blog do not have any idea as to what type of scammers exist on the other side. Because if f they truly did, they would not defend everyone of their same gender so valiantly with making sweep blanket statements.

    There is both misogyny & misandry and it is toxic.

  670. FatBastardSD says:

    @Principium

    This has nothing to do with a battle of the sexes. WCSD brought up some common “scams” fake SB’s use. I have been messaged by many fake SB’s myself and even met a few. I am sure every SD has the same experiences. We just have to deal with it but if a SD posted that these SB’s should be burned at the stake don’t you think that would be a bit silly?

  671. DianaSBinOC says:

    What if the SD tries to pay in chocolate covered garbanzo beans…then what?

    I was thinking strips of layered bubble gum lol.

  672. DianaSBinOC says:

    I would send out messages stating I was looking for a NSA relationship (also specified in my profile), many SB’s somehow inferred that I was looking for P4P. Many SB’s insisted I had to provide an allowance right from the first meet while we got to know each other. When I told them I was not interested they all replied I wanted P4P and should find an escort (do they really think that’s going to guilt me into giving them money?).

    No they aren’t guilting you , they are actually saying ” find an escort”.

    If you talk to the SB and tell them you are seeking NSA with an allowance structure then fine. However NSA with P4P automatically makes most Sbs think ” cheap hooker hunter”.

    Obviously the see what you’re used to paying an escort by the hour, you’re trying to get out of them for a week, 2 weeks a month etc.

    That’s exactly what is happening most on the site. The guy pays his usual escort hour fee and adds dinner, talking, endless hours of sex ( think swollen area) and then moves on til next time.

    Now of course these john types could easily say the sex isn’t that great. Sure she’s not a seasoned pro having sex with 10-25 guys a month. Still this doesn’t deter these types because of the bargain and the feeling that they have succeeded in getting something normally reserved for a better looking, younger man.

    Also why does everyone always have to announce “We’re all adults …”

  673. Principium says:

    They have Whole Foods in Hillbilly land?

  674. Principium says:

    Some peep get light envelops and some get heavy photos. We all want justice. Runzzzz…

  675. lil_tm says:

    @ Spicey. I’m growing more and more certain I’ve had my one shot at tru wuv.

    However, when you get over there if you see a tall/dark/handsome man that knows how to treat a person well and likes a girl to cook for him, yell out code words “THE ONE”

    Thanks.

    Oh, and if he has a Whole Foods gift card that automatically replenishes when it gets low, that’d be great!

  676. SugarySpicey says:

    Princi – my situation was different. It was someone else who had a light envelope. My less-than agreed-upon disappointment was due to my own naïveté, and with someone I thought I was interested in, until I realized that despite my vetting, I had been duped. It was revolting!

  677. SugarySpicey says:

    Damn this slippery slope! Let’s all go to eHarmony and find true luuuurv!

  678. lil_tm says:

    ^LOL fattyB!!

  679. FatBastardSD says:

    @lil_tm

    Depends if the beans have been “processed” or not.

    I am not sure if garbanzo beans could ever be considered legal tender.

  680. Principium says:

    Battle of the sexes arguments kill off my juicy, naughty and playful side.

    @ Spicey: I recall that very same episode which you commented, by your own previous account, had happened to you. Therefore you have every right to be upset and IMO a light envelope is considered stealing (never to trifle with a mob member with those kind of shenanigans). I feel bad that it happened and I am sure that you are not alone. I stand corrected.

  681. lil_tm says:

    But serioulsy, I feel this blog is a little ree-dunk-ulous.

    Widows, Catholics and Women are who to watch out for the most??

    I think they meant black widows, people of all religions AND atheists, women AND men.

    Who writes that b.s. anyway? Troll troll troll ya boat.

  682. lil_tm says:

    What if the SD tries to pay in chocolate covered garbanzo beans…then what?
    😀

  683. FatBastardSD says:

    @SugarySpicey

    If the SD does not pay it is fraud in the best case and possibly rape as well. If the SB does not hold up her end of the deal then the SD still should pay but shame on the SB for ruining a happy day. Does that mean she gets a frown face sticker on her calendar or something?

  684. FatBastardSD says:

    @SugarySpicey

    Well I assume the SB also enjoyed the sexy time with the SD so what’s the problem here. She will just decide not to see the SD again if she thinks he was a cheap bastard.

    Maybe neither enjoyed the sexy time, so why should the SD pay for sexy time?

    The SB can always ask for the money up front like an escort or prostitute would.

    Seems like the best strategy is not to have sexy time unless you want it. Of course you seem to be advocating that the pay is for sexy time only.

  685. SugarySpicey says:

    Fati – Bad oral is the best way to ruin anyone’s day! Take it out of her hide. But, consent is not related to quality, only delivery.

  686. SugarySpicey says:

    Fati – scammed is an arrangement for an allowance of X, when y is placed into an envelopes and the SD enjoys sexy time with his SB, knowing that he has told her that, say $500 would be in the envelope, but instead the envelope contains $100.

    That is fraud/stealing/scamming and some men on this site do that all the time, and that is just a nasty way to treat a person.

  687. FatBastardSD says:

    @SugarySpicey

    Rosie has commented that her friend has noticed the proliferation of P4P SD’s on the site. Other SB’s have commented on this as well. I am not convinced that this is actually true because I have been accused of wanting P4P when this was not the case.

    Alright then should I not pay my SB if the oral sex was not up to my standard? But if I do not pay her then it was rape right? You see my dilemma here.

    @lim_tm

    I was only asking DianaSBinOC. My guess is that based on how you describe an arrangement it would be very difficult for you to get tricked in to putting out.

  688. FatBastardSD says:

    @lil_tm

    Being tricked is in the eye of the beholder. Are people who invest in ponzi schemes who are told they will get a 500% return being tricked or are they greedy? Is the SB who only “puts out” for guys who claim to make over $1M year in the hope that a $10K monthly allowance is rolling in being tricked or is she greedy? Is the not so attractive SD who buys gifts to a pretty woman because she told him she feels a connection being tricked or is he greedy?

  689. lil_tm says:

    “How about a first hand account of a SD scamming you.
    @lil_tm”

    psh! I’m to clever for that, fatty! 😀

  690. FatBastardSD says:

    @DianaSBinOC

    How about a first hand account of a SD scamming you.

    @lil_tm

  691. SugarySpicey says:

    Fati – what do you mean by P4P horror stories? I don’t recall women complaining here about the P4P element, only the deception element.

    And, if you make an agreement that your SB should mouth your man muscle and she doesn’t, then yes, she isn’t keeping her end of the agreement.

  692. lil_tm says:

    “@lil_tm
    If a SB wants money to as a show I am not wasting time that is their right. Just as it is my right to refuse. Not a big deal, we can both move on. My only point was that I was not looking for P4P but that’s how they saw it. When I hear a P4P horror story I wonder if it is just a case of the SB not getting exactly what they want which turns into the SD being a P4P asshole.”

    One potential did tell me lots of girls would take money from him and run. Not sure if he was being honest, but I don’t believe it’s always the guys who are swindling and tricking.

    But these problems are something that you have to deal with in ANY interaction with another human being. Are they are an honest, good person or a conniving sleeze ball?
    If you wanna find out, you have to take the time to get to know them.
    I hate to see anyone get taken advantage of. Male or female. And to the people who do that type of thing…who raised you??

  693. DianaSBinOC says:

    Wow are those the real qualifiers? Seriously umm 71% of women are the fakes? lol .

    “The real fraud: the numerous! American Men on this site who lie about who they are, trick girls into putting out, promise “sugar to come” and then poof. That is stealing, and it’s disgusting. At least SA has a “report user” tool now.”

    BINGO!

    All of the reports and reviews of this very fact somehow don’t seem to be highlighted in this blog post.

  694. FatBastardSD says:

    @SugarySpicey

    “I feel that SA needs to give a more guidance on “arrangements” now that tgey are in the mass market. It is so vague nobody knows what to expect or how to proceed. But, your thinly veiled swipe at me is misplaced. I don’t think that an SD needs to gift for “getting to know you” or at all (unless he says that he will). I also see a great difference between NSA and P4P (which I actually have no moral objection to).”

    I am pretty sure everyone on the SA site is an adult and can decide what arrangement makes them happy.

    Not sure if the thinly veiled swipe is referring to me

  695. FatBastardSD says:

    @lil_tm

    If a SB wants money to as a show I am not wasting time that is their right. Just as it is my right to refuse. Not a big deal, we can both move on. My only point was that I was not looking for P4P but that’s how they saw it. When I hear a P4P horror story I wonder if it is just a case of the SB not getting exactly what they want which turns into the SD being a P4P asshole.

  696. FatBastardSD says:

    @SugarySpicey

    I don’t know what my relationship with my SB has to do with my point. If my SB does not give me good oral sex when we meet up is it fraud or theft?

  697. lil_tm says:

    “I would send out messages stating I was looking for a NSA relationship (also specified in my profile), many SB’s somehow inferred that I was looking for P4P. Many SB’s insisted I had to provide an allowance right from the first meet while we got to know each other. When I told them I was not interested they all replied I wanted P4P and should find an escort (do they really think that’s going to guilt me into giving them money?).”

    Fatty, you can’t be sure they were trying to get money out of you. It’s quite possible they just wanted some type of assurance that you weren’t wasting their time.
    I’m not saying I agree, though.
    In that sense, I think it should be treated like regular dating. If you’re truly interested in the person, you won’t care about wasting your time because you’ll want to see how it plays out. I mean, you can tell when a man is interested in seeing you again. He’ll care if you are comfortable, take the time to walk you to your car and see you off, make sure you got home ok, etc.

    When men truly want something, they put in whatever effort is necessary to get it. And that’s a fact, jack. :)

    We’ve all been bamboozled before. Yea, it sucks,..but it’s not fair to be weary of everyone because of it.

  698. SugarySpicey says:

    I feel that SA needs to give a more guidance on “arrangements” now that tgey are in the mass market. It is so vague nobody knows what to expect or how to proceed. But, your thinly veiled swipe at me is misplaced. I don’t think that an SD needs to gift for “getting to know you” or at all (unless he says that he will). I also see a great difference between NSA and P4P (which I actually have no moral objection to).

  699. lil_tm says:

    “@ Lil_Tm: I had already sensed that you were as queer as a 3 Dollar bill”

    I believe unique would be a more accuarate description. :p

    “BTW, from the last blog topic: yes from behind”

    Well, since we’re being queer, we may as well take behinds into account.

  700. FatBastardSD says:

    @Rosie

    I would send out messages stating I was looking for a NSA relationship (also specified in my profile), many SB’s somehow inferred that I was looking for P4P. Many SB’s insisted I had to provide an allowance right from the first meet while we got to know each other. When I told them I was not interested they all replied I wanted P4P and should find an escort (do they really think that’s going to guilt me into giving them money?).

    When I hear all the stories of SD’s and P4P offers, I think back on my own situation and wonder how much of the problem is simply a case of SB’s creating a situation out of nothing. Maybe they need some drama so they can blog about it.

  701. SugarySpicey says:

    Princi – I am hoping that some man who is considering this heinous activity will read this blog, and realize that his actions aren’t a funny way to get a “piece” from a hot chick, they are a terrible way to violate a human. I don’t believe you would ever treat a woman that way, so I’m not trying to persuade you to my way of thinking, as I think we’re already aligned and just debating semantics.

  702. Principium says:

    @ Lil_Tm: I had already sensed that you were as queer as a 3 Dollar bill 😉

    BTW, from the last blog topic: yes from behind 😉

  703. SugarySpicey says:

    Fati – what one may justify legally, and what one does to other humans because they are too naive to know how to protect themselves are worlds apart.

    You, yourself, view the arrangement that you have with your SB as a bit transactional.

  704. lil_tm says:

    “I always laugh at this ‘issue’ that SBs have. How is this any different than the men on Match, OKCupid, Plenty of Fish who promise of a ‘relationship’ and then poof? Or let alone the guy you meet at the bar, restaurant, coffee shop, park, etc. that promises the same, and takes off after getting laid? There are guys who do this. Screen for them, and as always only have sex if you WANT to have sex…not because you WANT to get paid. Then if the asshole poofs…you don’t feel used.”

    Great point!

  705. Principium says:

    @ Spicey: this can become one of those tedious & time wasting arguments akin to equating all SBs to prostitutes or all SDs to johns. Such sub sets definitely exist, but they are not the full context. The way you have defined it, it is a breach of contract and it is considered as fraud rather than theft. Since you do not agree, let’s just respectfully agree to disagree.

  706. FatBastardSD says:

    @SugarySpicey

    “I might actually say that since consent was given based on the premise of some gift, if one doesn’t follow through, one has not received consent”

    I hope you are not thinking of joining the legal profession. As far as I know, sex for money transactions are illegal, and SA forbids escorts and prostitutes for using this service. Why are SB’s coming on the blog complaining about this happening to them when they know it is not condoned by the SA site?

  707. Rosie says:

    I know it’s such a fine line, but it literally makes me cringe every single time the words pay, paying or paid are used on the blog. 😕

    It shouldn’t feel like you’re getting PAID to perform. EVER. But I guess that’s what arrangements have evolved into? (Based on everything I read here.)

  708. lil_tm says:

    LOL@ the top two applying to me.

    *blushes*

  709. FatBastardSD says:

    @Rosie

    “This is really an issue on SA now? Makes me thankful that I was in early on before the site gained popularity. I went on plenty of SA dates before committing to an arrangement and none of those things ever happened to me. The “tricking to put out” part befuddles me as well. Then again, my arrangements were not transactional in nature at all and treated like relationships with accelerated added benefits.”

    The SB’s who get “tricked” into sex are not looking for the same type of arrangement you were. If this is happening more often then it has to do with the change in types of SD’s AND SB’s who have joined SA.

    @WCSD

    I get these messages as well. Never fell for it yet.

    @Principium

    Right on with the most common cases of fraud. I think people expect to much from online dating sites though. It’s just a way to set up blind dates. You still have to do the work!

  710. SugarySpicey says:

    Capitol P: Taking something that one knows they should be paying for (in some way) without paying is theft. It is also defrauding and swindling. I might actually say that since consent was given based on the premise of some gift, if one doesn’t follow through, one has not received consent. Sex without consent is typically considered rape, though rape by deceit may be a less violent form.

  711. Rosie says:

    “@ Wosie: I agree that with the site becoming more populated (I can’t use the word popular with a straight face 😉 )” -Principium

    Yes, over-populated would be a much better way to define it! My girlfriend has given up after just a short search. She has been disappointed with many things, but mostly with the overtures of P4P offering by men from the get-go. It kind of stinks for her because we’re friends and my experiences were all great. I told her to not give up hope yet, but it seems both SBs and SDs from the blog all feel the same disappointment.

    RE: The Face of Fraud (Percentage of 60,000 Banned Accounts)

    This is assuming everyone is 100% honest when setting up profiles, which we all know is B.S.

  712. Principium says:

    I don’t agree that “theft” is the correct term to use, although I will concur that the psychological ramifications can be far more damaging than having something stolen from one’s possessions. Defrauding and swindling are more appropriate terms. Being a confidence trickster is revolting irrespective of one’s gender.

    @ Wosie: I agree that with the site becoming more populated (I can’t use the word popular with a straight face 😉 ) and its imbuing with the P4P types, whether the providers or the seekers of those services, the site seems to have lost a majority of its original members, i.e, the professional and yet very busy benefactors who had very little time left for a meaningful social life, whilst past a certain age demographic group; plus the genuine full-time college co-eds trying to navigate through a tricky job market situation, while dealing with sizable debt.

    Or perhaps I was just too naive right from the outset and bought into the original sales pitch of Mr. Wade, hook, line & sinker!

  713. Rosie says:

    I guess it all goes back to screening really well – whether it’s SA or traditional dating.

    I think it’s just common sense for a man NOT to send money to a woman before meeting her and establishing the arrangement agreement…and same goes for the women, don’t put out if you aren’t comfortable with everything leading up to the moment.

    Others might disagree with me for saying this, but if a young woman is putting up a profile on SA before fully understanding what an arrangement is and doesn’t know exactly what she’s looking for by joining the site, she simply shouldn’t join. But I know that’s not reality. Some women join out of desperation. Some join because the lifestyle is alluring. Some join because they just want to be spoiled. Whatever the reason, one needs to be very clear about why they are here and screen their pots very well.

  714. SugarySpicey says:

    Rosie and TM – every other month a girl logs on to the blog to say that this disgusting theft has happened to her. It’s nice to rest comfortably in one’s own wisdom and life experience, but some naive, inexperienced girls who get lured to this site don’t have that benefit, they don’t understand what a “mutually beneficial arrangement” is, and they get screwed, in a most unpleasant way. That fraud is far more damaging than a few extra elbees. But I always echo the sentiment Rosie shared: don’t have sex with someone you don’t want to have sex with … and get what you’re looking for before panties hit the floor.

    I wish SA had used this article to share actionable information instead of fluff.

  715. Rosie says:

    “If the discussion does not get derailed early, this blog can not be taken seriously if the most rampant components of “fraud” are not mentioned!

    – Age
    – Height & weight
    – accuracy of photos

    Of course the above related to all online dating websites and when you throw in SA, all the other delusions of grandeur also come into play ;)” -Principium

    I co-sign everything above!

  716. Rosie says:

    “The real fraud: the numerous! American Men on this site who lie about who they are, trick girls into putting out, promise “sugar to come” and then poof. That is stealing, and it’s disgusting. At least SA has a “report user” tool now.” -Spicey

    This is really an issue on SA now? Makes me thankful that I was in early on before the site gained popularity. I went on plenty of SA dates before committing to an arrangement and none of those things ever happened to me. The “tricking to put out” part befuddles me as well. Then again, my arrangements were not transactional in nature at all and treated like relationships with accelerated added benefits.

  717. WCSD says:

    @Spicey – “The real fraud: the numerous! American Men on this site who lie about who they are, trick girls into putting out, promise “sugar to come” and then poof. That is stealing, and it’s disgusting”

    I always laugh at this ‘issue’ that SBs have. How is this any different than the men on Match, OKCupid, Plenty of Fish who promise of a ‘relationship’ and then poof? Or let alone the guy you meet at the bar, restaurant, coffee shop, park, etc. that promises the same, and takes off after getting laid? There are guys who do this. Screen for them, and as always only have sex if you WANT to have sex…not because you WANT to get paid. Then if the asshole poofs…you don’t feel used.

  718. SugarySpicey says:

    This article could have been less honest, less accurate, and less useful – but it would have needed for someone to put some actual thought into the article in order for that to happen.

    The real fraud: the numerous! American Men on this site who lie about who they are, trick girls into putting out, promise “sugar to come” and then poof. That is stealing, and it’s disgusting. At least SA has a “report user” tool now.

    The background verified tool is complete, useless BS. Don’t trust the quote about “screening and safety” there basically is none.

  719. Principium says:

    Second, but I have popcorn!

    If the discussion does not get derailed early, this blog can not be taken seriously if the most rampant components of “fraud” are not mentioned!

    – Age
    – Height & weight
    – accuracy of photos

    Of course the above related to all online dating websites and when you throw in SA, all the other delusions of grandeur also come into play 😉

  720. WCSD says:

    Wow, thanks SA! What would we do without this information!

    So you are telling me to stay away from female Catholics, who are from Nigeria, and are widowed? Surprise! The thing is that these are the obvious fraudsters. That NYC 21 year old student who needs money because their car broke down…and they promise to see you once it is fixed probably doesn’t fall into being a ‘fraud’ profile…but nonetheless is. But in my opinion, if you are dumb enough to fall for it then you won’t have your money for long anyway. Do you know how many times I’ve been contacted by someone who is in ‘dire need’, they are stuck in another country and need money to get a plane ticket back ‘home’, and they’ll make it up to me once they are back? I always tell these poor lost soles to send me a scan of their passport, and I’ll just book you a plane ticket….ha ha!

    Anyway, another compelling blog topic that is just riveting in its relevance…..

  721. Jersey Darling says:

    First!

  722. Angela says:

    All personalities and perspectives are welcome in the blog, while personal attacks and name calling are not. It’s inevitable that there will be disagreements but let’s handle it as mature adults with class to keep the dialog constructive and respectful. Please refer to the “Blog Etiquette” for more details. For the newbies, please take a look at the “Sugar Daddy Dating Tips” section on the right for a list of commonly discussed topics and the “SD and SB Blog List” section to see the perspective of other sugars. Now comment away and let’s enjoy the blog…

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