4 years ago
Dos and Don’ts for Sugar Daddies

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DO: Be Clear About Expectations on Time Commitment.

Yes, your time is money, so is her’s. Keep in mind that she has other factors in life aside from being a Sugar Baby companion. Set up a meeting schedule that works for both of you.

DON’T: Think That You Are Entitled to Sex on the First Date

If you are looking for a quick fix, they have services for that. Sugar Babies are looking for a benefactor who can add value to their lives. Not a John looking to score a quick hook-up.

DO: Provide a Discreet Arrangement

Some people are comfortable making it known that they dip in the Sugar Bowl. Keep in mind that, though a Sugar Baby may not have a high profile position, they aren’t immune to outside criticism. Treat her to as much discretion as you would like in return.

DON’T: No Call, No Show

One would think that any man with enough disposable income to become a Sugar Daddy would have the manners to let a woman know if he is going to be late or not show up at all. Unfortunately, it happens more often than not. If something does come up, or if you have lost interest, have the courtesy to let the girl know.

DO: Spoil Because She Deserves It, Not Because She Wants It

This separates the Splenda from Sugar. A Sugar Baby should never have to ask her Sugar Daddy to take her shopping, on a vacation, or to a nice dinner. If she wants to have to nag someone to spoil her, then she would be in a conventional relationship.

DON’T: Be Rude to a POT SB Because She Isn’t Your Type

Maybe you aren’t into African Americans, or Asians, or Caucasian woman. Maybe the POT Sugar Baby you met for dinner can’t hold a candle to your conversation skills. This does not mean that you should be dismissive or rude. Kindly decline the arrangement and move on.

DO: Be Open About Your Other Sugar Babies

Sugar Babies hate surprises—unless it comes in the form of gifts, a vacation to (insert our favorite destination here), or anything else that is sparkly and brand new. Be upfront about any new or current SBs that you have.

DON’T: Be That Guy

Don’t approach a Sugar Baby asking for private photos right off the bat. It makes you sound sleazy and inexperienced.

DO: Practice Safe Sex

If you are intimate with your Sugar Baby, remember to practice safe sex. Don’t be the kind of guy that tries to get away with pressuring a girl to have sex sans condom, dental dam, female condom, etc.

DON’T: Make Her Bring Up The Money, Beat Her To It

A true gentleman has the innate ability to handle money matters before the woman knows what hit her. Bring up the money, handle it, and move on.

DON’T: Compare Your Current SB to A Past Arrangement?

Just because one Sugar Baby loved to cook you dinner every Saturday in a French maid uniform, doesn’t mean the next one will be in to that. Women hate being compared to other women, try to avoid doing so.

DO: Spice Things Up

Remember, Sugar Babies want to experience new and exciting things with their Sugar Daddies. Spice things up with new trips, activities, events, and even when it comes to the bedroom. If you want an exciting Sugar Baby, then you have to be an exciting Daddy.

What are other dos and don’ts for Sugar Daddies?

Sugar Daddies, what do you think about these dos and don’ts?

 

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1,346 Responses to “Dos and Don’ts for Sugar Daddies”

  1. whatawebsite says:

    This is a nice list of Dos and Don’ts.

    To expand a little on the “Don’t compare your current SB to a past arrangement”.

    If your new SB asks about your ex SB, she’s understandably curious – answer her!

    Do not compare – e.g., don’t be a jerk and say “She had a better ass than you, but your tits are bigger” – do say when & how you met the ex, how long it lasted, and the things you liked & didn’t like.

  2. TX Jay Jay says:

    DON’T enter arrangement with proposed terms regarding $$$ and then 2 weeks into it say “I want to date a girl who likes me for me, paying for companionship makes me feel bad about myself” and actually expect her to stick around….especially when you’re MARRIED!! Not charming, not cool, not FAIR!

  3. Darell Fiore says:

    Nadie conoce en Luxemburgo al supuesto Comité Civil de Inteligencia para el que dice haber trabajado este excomisario de policía y ex agente secreto al que Jean-Claude Juncker, destacado europeísta y primer ministro del que es —tras Mónaco— el segundo país con mayor renta por habitante del mundo, colocó como agente en el servicio secreto del Gran Ducado después de que trabajara como su chófer y escolta durante casi 20 años.

  4. Chuhou says:

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts about sugar baby.

    Regards

    my webpage

  5. Alex Tellstone says:

    HI LADIES.IM LOVIN AND CARING.I’m either seeking an arrangement or a woman very ope minded.I’m not tradional but very open in the passion department.I HOPE YOU LIKE.I PERFER MORE LONG TERM.

  6. OZSD says:

    Spicey loved your list of dos and don’ts – but really? Are SDs doing those things? And good advice to Gallo who sounds like a good bloke as we say Downunder.
    @ Treasured have you been offered your own newspaper column (or the online equivalent)? Whether I agree or disagree, it’s always a pleasure reading your witty and perceptive insights.

  7. che says:

    Love the blog.

    Just trying to find my way around,I am new to the site.

  8. Rosie says:

    New blog post!

  9. Principium says:

    @ Sweetie, Hello

    I haven’t forgotten about your email 😉

    “This should be framed and hanged on the wall!”

    So should its original instigator, i.e, FBSD! Hahahehe

  10. sweetie says:

    Hi, P!

    FB @sweetie

    A cut and paste message + Boring profile = Don’t bother.

    A cut and paste message + Nice profile = Be proactive, message the SD back!

    Try it out and see if you have more success.

    This should be framed and hanged on the wall!

  11. Principium says:

    Ladies, it is a numbers game and men most often go on a carpet bombing mission when doing the online thing. That’s what MEN do and the reason is that if men do not bust a move, they get the left overs. You ladies swing from branch to branch and once have a firm grip, most likely let go of the weaker hold. Us men do not do that and tend to cast nets using a fishing analogy. Do not take it personally although most copy & paste hack jobs should be discarded, the ones which smell like copy & paste, but the sender took the effort to read your profile and sprinkled some hints of your own profile plus having a decent profile of his own, should merit a second look/chance.

    If I came across a very shallow SB profile for whatever reason I was attracted to write to her, I have this wickedly devious email template (designed by yours truly) which is a part of my nuclear arsenal. That email garners a response without fail as long as the recipient signs onto the website and reads it. I KID YOU NOT!

    Now, I’m no longer on the site and would never, ever, EVAAA divulge that email transcript to anyone of you. Like I said, it is pretty innocent yet clever without being sinister or creepy. I’ve had a couple of cases when the girl wrote back and played along or told me outright it was one of the cleverst ones they received to get a resposne (No DianaSB, it is not the one which you had originally received from me) I’m a tease and won’t tell you its content even if you dip me in tar and roll me in feathers! Haha

  12. DaddyGT says:

    WCSD put it best.

    With the right chemistry, sex on the first date is great. We are all adults, right?

  13. Rosie says:

    “The problem is when people can’t distinguish between wants and expectations…” -WCSD

    That’s exactly it. I would be lying if I said I’ve never had sex on a first date (SA dating and otherwise). Those first date sex interactions happened willingly because there was mutual chemistry and we couldn’t keep our hands off each other not because it was expected or because a gift was given. The one first date sex I had with a pot SD ended up being one of my longest arrangements.

    I’m not saying it’s wrong for SBs to want/expect a gift. I don’t agree with it as it just was never my approach but I guess everyone has their reasoning. I just wondered why it seems to be such an expectation now. I was always flattered when a pot SD surprised me with a gift on a first date. Usually attraction was already established before the first date anyway so a gift just magnified the attraction because truthfully, what girl doesn’t enjoy surprises – whether it’s SA dating or traditional, right?

  14. Lo says:

    That’s not what I said fatbastard…

  15. FatBastardSD says:

    @WCSD

    I probably am in the minority as Lo suggested as I have very rarely wanted sex on the first date. Of course I will imagine her sitting naked during much of the date, or imagine what she would look like in various sexual positions if she is attractive. I am always willing to wait a bit, because if there is attraction between us then sex happen and there is no reason to rush.

    I agree with you on the differences between wanting and expecting

  16. FatBastardSD says:

    @sweetie

    A cut and paste message + Boring profile = Don’t bother.

    A cut and paste message + Nice profile = Be proactive, message the SD back!

    Try it out and see if you have more success.

  17. WCSD says:

    @FB – First messages. I agree that if the SB hasn’t put a lot of effort into her profile to distinguish herself (and essentially you are contacting her because her pictures are hot), then yes a generic message is about all you can do in the hopes of getting some more meaning when the messages start flowing between each other. But then again, if they don’t like the generic message, who cares? They aren’t selling themselves really enough to warrant much else. And in the reality of the number of SBs per SD…selling themselves more than a hot picture and a generic profile is the only way they are going to find a SD.

  18. Spicey says:

    Waiting on room service –

    The intro email doesn’t matter much to me, it’s the subsequent communications that count. When I was on SA I got a lot of traffic, reading through a novel from every guy would have been tiresome. I’m completely fine with “How you doing” and all the other lame intros. I’ll take it from there on the witty getting-to-know-you banter after the first email if I’m interested.

  19. WCSD says:

    @Rosie – Agreed. Yet, we all know that SDs want sex on the first date, and that SBs want a gift on the first date (hey we are all human…). I’ve always told pots (and even regular dates) when asked about the ‘do you expect/want sex on the first date?’ – ‘If the chemistry is there, of course I’ll want it. I NEVER expect it though. We are two grown adults. Let’s enjoy our time together, and if that means sex, then great. If not, then great.’

    The problem is when people can’t distinguish between wants and expectations…

  20. sweetie says:

    of my time, sorry

  21. sweetie says:

    Diana “Then there is the issue with the message being too generic

    Example: I found your profile/ pictures interesting and I’d like to get to know you better.”

    Yep, this was the case. Not holding my breath on Robocop, but I do find it a waste on my time.

    FB, I know I shouldn’t expect the most elaborated email, but it was such a turn-off and his profile, pretty much non-existent. I’d rather get a wink, at least I know to ignore those.
    And by the way, your bastard approach is appreciated. :)

  22. Lo says:

    treasured u r mean for picking up and leaving like that

  23. DaddyGT says:

    I have to agree a lot with the FatBastard.

    And disagree most vehemenantly with LookingGlassSB. And to a lesser degree with Spicey.

    Sugar dating is great. But over the last couple of years, I have come to realise that trying to find what I want on SA is pretty difficult.

    After much soul searching, I had to admit that I am one of those looking for relationships (of sorts), with sugar. Why sugar? I’ve covered some of this before, but includes widening the dating pool beyond my social circles. The M/F ratio here helps too. For guys that is.

    SBs that treat this as a job turn me off. So do those who use the value of any $$ exchanged as indicative of how much into me they need to be.

    Personally, my take is that if you would not date me if sugar was not involved, then I probably don’t want you a SB …. But then again, I am not the typical SD … (only 36, never married, no kids, decent body, and do better than alright in IRL offline dating).

    And as I’ve said before:
    SDs – sugar or not, you still need to woo the woman
    SBs – sugar or not, you still need to seduce the man.

    I still think anyone gifting on the first date is a chump. I also think any SB going on a date that feels like a chore (requiring remuneration) is a chump as well.

  24. Rosie says:

    I’m not quite sure where the expectation of a gift or full allowance by the second date came from. I’m curious to know if that’s a mindset that collectively developed as direct result of so many bad experiences?

    Bottom line?

    -Expecting a gift on the first date makes you look like a gold digger.
    -Expecting sex on the first date makes you look like a creep.

  25. Lo says:

    Emily my winks favorites and messages are kind of trickling in. Hows your pics?

  26. FatBastardSD says:

    @sweetie

    I can only discuss how a bastard approaches or views things.

    I played the numbers game with the first message. Most SB profiles do not really tell me anything other than that the SB likes animals, shopping, going out with her friends, and that she does not want anyone “fake” or “creepy” to contact her. The first message is an opening for you to look at the SD profile and signal your interest to discuss things further, nothing more. If you are waiting for a really well thought out first message, you may be waiting a really long time. With the large ratio of SB’s to SD’s on the site you must be proactive.

    Consider this analogy:

    Getting messages is equivalent to getting propositioned at a bar. Easy. Getting an arrangement is like you getting a marriage offer. Not as easy.

  27. Has anyone noticed a dry spell in the Sugar scene? Lately, I haven’t gotten very many e-mails through SA.

  28. Spicey says:

    Here’s the trick to not getting screwed (in an unpleasant way) by sugar.

    1. Don’t have sex with someone you don’t want to have sex with. Ever. Period.

    2. Don’t have sex with someone who doesn’t care about your sexual pleasure. Ever. Period. Fatty there is no amount of money that makes up for cruelty, abusing an SB in that way is cruel. If you’re going to treat her that way then you should pursue pros. Kindness in women is precious and special, and you damage that special part of a woman by abusing her so callously.

    3. Know what makes you feel special and pampered, and then allow the man to take the lead in providing it. I don’t ask for allowance, but I also don’t put out until I’ve received gift$ that are of a value I find sexy. $300 isn’t sexy to me, it may be life changing to an SB who’s a month late on rent. “Gifting” makes the man feel like he’s providing for me, not buying me. And it helps with points one and two.

    Back to the swim up bar!

  29. DianaSBinOC says:

    Yah everyone returned to the blog:) Aww

  30. DianaSBinOC says:

    > What do you do if the message sounds like it’s been copied and pasted, very robotic?! I can’t even tell if I should reply or not. It did leave options for further contact, though. Man, if you think I might be a good fit for you, wouldn’t you put some effort in your lines?

    Generally I can tell when either A. The person in question attempted to ask a question and then move onto an answer for that question.

    Example : Hi how are you doing? Glad to hear you’re well.

    How does he know I’m doing well when I never got a chance to respond?

    Then there is the issue with the message being too generic

    Example: I found your profile/ pictures interesting and I’d like to get to know you better.

    The last part is to close the deal with providing contact. Usually they’ll just provide the contact information and may hint at not being on the site all that much to check messages here. Another tactic is stating ” I’m closing my acct.” typically the ones that message that within the first message aren’t going anywhere. They’ll be here in a week to the following year but the typical sales tactic of making you rush to contact them. This allows a flooding of contact into their email without having to even log in. Keep in mind this depends on how long that SD has been active. If it shows he’s been active for less than a month then you have to wonder what he was expecting.

    You can email me @…..

    Usually with the “hurry up and wait for me” types I tend to ask them to talk here until their acct closes.
    +

    In most cases he’s sent this message to many women and usually he’s more interested in their pictures yet hasn’t realized that most don’t even match what he’s looking for. Pretty much using the numbers game.

  31. WCSD says:

    @FB – I agree. I look at sugar as a friends with benefits relationship. We need to be friends first before the benefits happen. Does spoiling on both sides happen while creating the friendship? Absolutely! But if the expectation is a full allowance etc. at a time that doesn’t seem right, then drama has been inserted, and it is over.

  32. FatBastardSD says:

    @WCSD

    This is what surprised me the most. The number of SB’s I met who wanted their full allowance by the second meet, but insisted that we still had to get to know each other before anything romantic could happen. People accuse me of looking down at SB’s but my point was that I never understood why these SB’s thought that I should be paying them while they get to know me (although it seems if I am not a male model they should not even acknowledge my existence).

    I also never understood the whole Platonic SB meme either but I suppose that is another story.

  33. FatBastardSD says:

    @Jersey Darling

    Don’t get me wrong it is easy to filter out SB who are not compatible with me. The problem is that I believe that many SB’s are not honest in what they are really after which makes the process more unpleasant as now you have to determine who is lying or manipulating in addition to who is compatible. This is not that hard either but it really makes meeting a new SB tiring. I have no doubt that many SD’s are just as dishonest as the SB’s I complain about. I at least have 15-20 years of additional experience of being screwed over by businesses, employers, women, and the government so I can often see it coming. For a 20 year old woman it is much more difficult I am sure.

    Long distance arrangements are not my ideal. I prefer not to have predefined times/days to meet, which becomes a requirement when travel is involved. If I am willing to spend $2K-$3K per month then strange as it may sound I would prefer to give as much of that as possible to my SB. Money that goes into travelling, hotels etc. cuts into the allowance.

  34. WCSD says:

    @FB – I’ve said this before, and I’ll say it again…the only way any relationship (sugar included) works is if you’ve earned the other persons trust (and they’ve earned yours). Too many people approach it the other way that the other person needs to show me they are trustworthy (i.e. give me a gift or get lost).

    Maybe this is just a different way of what JD is saying and it is about making yourself vulnerable. I my experience, just talking about this with pots as set the stage of expectations for trust between us, and in general it goes well. Are there people who are hustlers? Absolutely! But sugar has little to do with it. Hustlers are everywhere, and put no effort (or pretty crappy effort) into earning your trust.

    I obviously agree with Dorky’s approach of the stepping along at the start. Honestly I don’t know many (if any) of these relationships that have started otherwise…no matter the ‘stories’ you hear from others.

  35. Frank says:

    Spicey that’s a switch, you used to wake up naked and not remember taking off your clothes.

  36. Spicey says:

    Hola!

    Woke up in a bikini I don’t remember putting on. That is a lovely night.

    I personally don’t think a gift is necessary for a first date. But, a really nice gift will increase the likelihood that I’ll be in a giving mood as well. Typically a POT SD is very excited to meet me by the time of our face to face, so I’ve never had the concerns that other SBs are discussing.

    – out sugars, the yoga instructor here pulls your hair to get you into the right pose!!!

    And, the spa is unlimited usage for $169 per day! Two massages and a facial – don’t mind if I do.

  37. Jersey Darling says:

    Sorry, that’s [/img] – typo.

  38. Jersey Darling says:

    @Principium – Interesting link you posted. It got buried while waiting for moderation. To avoid that in the future, you can format the link differently so it does not look like a link or couch it between [img]link here[/iimg] so it can pass through moderation.

    When I get home from work later I may post some examples of what it is like on a traditional dating website and the types of messages women receive.

    Looks like Beck came back as a new personality – well, new alias, same personality – as Ayr. Beck, we said come back as yourself, not as another troll attempt.

  39. Jersey Darling says:

    @FatBastard “I agree with your point about being vulnerable. Look at the posts between myself and LookingGlassSB. Do you believe our messages through SA would have been any different? Yet we could be great for each other, I mean she may have a fetish for FatBastards!

    This is the main reason I stopped using the site. I just did not have the ability to give the SB’s the benefit of the doubt anymore. It seemed too many were approaching arrangements is a way to get as much out of me in a short a time as possible.”

    What I find fascinating, and I’m so glad I’ve found the blog to give me perspective on this, is I would have thought the process would be easier for men on here. You are the buyer, analogously speaking, and can easily skip over those who do not fit the criteria of what you want to buy.

    Here is where I am surprised that you are having a hard time. There are absolutely women on this site who take an approach that will jibe with what you are looking for. True there may not be many in your area, but if you geographically spread out your search (considering what I’ve heard of your allowance, you can afford that) it makes it easier to find what you are looking for.

    For women it is a bit more difficult. Most of us on here do not have the financial resources to spread out our search geographically using traditional methods, so we have to use this site or one that is similar to accomplish that. And I think most of us agree that unless you are looking for something primarily transactional where the focus is almost exclusively in the bedroom, this site isn’t the most pleasant experience for finding what you are looking for and we all get frustrated by it.

    BTW, I think your messages with LookingGlass would be the same if you were messaging privately, but I think you are both cut from different cloth. You are crass, but underneath it all I think you are a softie that would love if you found a woman who appreciated you.

    Another side note, I find it hilarious the amount of pushback you receive due to posting under the alias “FatBastard.” Considering how much everyone says they want honesty here, would people really prefer if you called yourself SvelteNonBastard?

  40. Jersey Darling says:

    @Sweetie, I’ve never once had good results from responding to a copy and paste message. But if you’re still interested, it doesn’t hurt to shoot him an email probing for more. For the minimal time investment it takes, why not if you’re curious? I just wouldn’t expect much.

    @Principium: “And your best advice to yourself (we are often equipped with good advice, but we sometimes do not listen to our advice!) lies in the last sentence above, with the exception of forgetting about men. Once you truly invest in your own passions and purpose, the men will follow that trail too.”

    No doubt of this, and that’s why I’m at the stage where I’ll probably be removing my profile soon. When you’re no longer enthusiastic and the process begins to feel like a job, people sense that. Better to stop participating and come back refreshed.

    I entirely agree with your statement that a woman who has devoted a lot of time to further herself can exponentially blossom when her financial stresses are taken away from her. This is where I am now. I’m well beyond my age in terms of development, and I think the right man would very much appreciate me. I am a deeply passionate, enthusiastic and driven person. But I do realize that it will take time to find what I’m looking for, and there is no guarantee I will find it at all. That is why time spent on yourself – further educating yourself, enjoying your hobbies, etc, is so important, because it is the only time invested that will always be there for you. You will always be there for you, and until you find the right person that makes you realize it shouldn’t be all about you, I tend to find it’s the best approach.

    I’m the organic type as well. When you have a legitimate connection with someone, most of the above will happen organically – even with an arrangement.

  41. Rosie says:

    Good night, sweetie! Keep us posted on Mr. Roboto. lol 😉

  42. sweetie says:

    Hehehe, I see. Good to know, better get one of those. Good night, Rosie and thanks for your responding.

  43. Rosie says:

    Oh no no no, I’m not painting walls! I’m painting parts for a shelf I’m refurbishing and and some photo frames! I don’t paint walls.That’s what boyfriends, SDs and husbands are for. 😉

  44. sweetie says:

    I’ll help, of course.

  45. sweetie says:

    Hehehe, well, you can come over and paint my walls as well :)

  46. Rosie says:

    The blog sucked me in!! >:O

  47. Rosie says:

    The color is called Eggshell Honeysuckle, for a few DIY projects I’m working on. Was supposed to do it while on vaca last week but procrastinated. lol

  48. sweetie says:

    Rosie, what color did you pick?

  49. Rosie says:

    @sweetie

    That’s all you can do at this point. At least he gave you some open-ended questions that gave you a reason to respond. Now ball’s in his court. A second email from him might give you a better peek into if he’s a good fit for you or not. If the next email comes back just as robotic, ask yourself, “is the juice worth the squeeze?” 😉

  50. sweetie says:

    I emailed him and asked to be more specific, if he is actually interested. We’ll see.

  51. sweetie says:

    Rosie, his profile is bare minimum, as well.

  52. Rosie says:

    @Sweetie

    Hi! I was out picking up paint (redecorating) and just got back in. I don’t check the blog from my phone. But to respond to your inquiry, did you like the guys profile outside of his seemingly copy/paste ‘robotic’ message to you?

  53. sweetie says:

    It’s hard to get opinions on a non-active blog. This is counter-productive, people. I am disappointed. A few days ago I would have gotten some answers pretty quickly… Jeez, is drama necessary to keep people interested in participating?
    SDGuru, bring the whip out!

  54. sweetie says:

    Is this pretty much a race?

  55. sweetie says:

    What do you do if the message sounds like it’s been copied and pasted, very robotic?! I can’t even tell if I should reply or not. It did leave options for further contact, though. Man, if you think I might be a good fit for you, wouldn’t you put some effort in your lines?

  56. Rosie says:

    I think the whole blog should just have makeup sex now! Always kills the tension. 😉

  57. Rosie says:

    I meant blog SDs

  58. Rosie says:

    “@ Rosie, I don’t do Runyon Cyn as I am about 100 miles south of there. But you have the LLL part down pat. If you ever come down further south (may be a semi sexual innuendo) we can go explore some of the finest trails where I’m at and let me tell you that Runyon doesn’t hold a candle. Heck if we are (un)lucky, we may see some real cougars too!” -Principium

    Semi sexual innuendo?! Lol! I didn’t know there was such a thing as an incomplete innuendo. You certainly ARE the NSA type. 😉 I’ll let you know if I ever come down further south where it sounds like your (happy)trails are much harder. 😉 Re: Cougars, there are plenty of the 2 legged types to spot I’m sure. I know they are abundant in Bev Hills and OC!

    As far as all the disappointments with seeking THE RIGHT arrangement, the discussions (arguments?) here seem to be apples and oranges really, IMHO. There’s apparent differences in approaches, desires, expectations, etc. I guess going back and forth about how it WAS and how it IS won’t really change much either. SA has evolved and thanks to our tech-savvy world, this type of dating is no longer what it used to be – and maybe not to something better or worse – just something different. Managing the change by adjusting strategies and approach (although painful, frustrating and exhausting) is an obvious option. And so is totally opting out, which it sounds like many blog SAs are choosing.

    Didn’t mean to sound so business-like, but that was as simply as I could state the way I feel about the whole thing after reading everyone’s thoughts.

  59. FatBastardSD says:

    @Jersey Darling

    I agree with your point about being vulnerable. Look at the posts between myself and LookingGlassSB. Do you believe our messages through SA would have been any different? Yet we could be great for each other, I mean she may have a fetish for FatBastards!

    This is the main reason I stopped using the site. I just did not have the ability to give the SB’s the benefit of the doubt anymore. It seemed too many were approaching arrangements is a way to get as much out of me in a short a time as possible.

    Still the saying “Better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all” is a valid one and I am glad to have tried.

  60. FatBastardSD says:

    @Principium

    “a woman who is somewhat alleviated from the financial stresses she faces in life, can make a great companion & lover once the man shows her true & genuine care through his willing generosity”

    This is what I believed the site was about when I first joined. And this is why I believed that both parties taking it slow (with intimacy and with allowance) was a perfectly normal approach.

    I do not believe the majority of SB’s on the site are looking for a lover and a companion. Many have BF’s for their emotional needs (as LookingGlassSB stated). Most are looking for an allowance.

  61. FatBastardSD says:

    @Jersey_Darling

    I agree with your point on giving back to make the woman see you do value her. Dorkey’s statement:

    If both sides advance in lockstep, then neither side need feel anxiety, or feel that they are being “used”.

    was the approach I thought was fair. Curious that the only very beautiful model /actress SB I had a brief arrangement with did not ask for a gift when meeting.

    @Lo

    You seemed to imply that taking it slow and asking for an allowance was a proper approach. Please elaborate on this, the only reason I can think of as to why this is proper is that you feel the SB is more valuable in the relationship. Correct me me if am wrong so I do not put words in your mouth. Is this the approach you take or are intimate soon after an arrangement is made?

    I think there is a difference between being a retail worker and a manager of a store, and yes I think many PEOPLE would be happy to become a manager at a store. Nothing wrong with working in retail though.

    I do not think the majority of SB’s on the site are of such beauty that they should be worried that some guy is just desperate to be seen with them in public. I do think many are unrealistic in the allowance requests they have. I do not lump all SB’s into one category. There are SB’s who are very nice people and SB’s who are horrible people.

  62. Principium says:

    @ Jersey: I just LOVED you post. Great resonance on almost every keynote.

    I do see where this comes from:

    “Which type of dating do I find more frustrating? The answer will surprise you. I find both sugar dating when taken in the context of seeking an arrangement and traditional dating equally bad. Both make me want to forget men altogether and go back to focusing on my career, my hobbies, or anything where my time is spent productively furthering myself.”

    And your best advice to yourself (we are often equipped with good advice, but we sometimes do not listen to our advice!) lies in the last sentence above, with the exception of forgetting about men. Once you truly invest in your own passions and purpose, the men will follow that trail too.

    Whether being a man or a woman, ultimately the more evolved types among us, recognize, appreciate and reward our gained higher values. In summary, dating and personal life achievements may be conflicting at times, but they are not mutually exclusive all the time.

    Hence my yapping and harping all along that a woman who is somewhat alleviated from the financial stresses she faces in life, can make a great companion & lover once the man shows her true & genuine care through his willing generosity. But then again, I’ve been called the organic type 😉

  63. Lo says:

    also aren’t you the same poster who thinks us sb’s could only hope to be a retail managers? So first you think we’d be lucky to be retail workers, and then you say that the majority of the sb’s on this site aren’t worth the allowances hinting it’s because of our looks. You accuse us of looking down on SDs but clearly you don’t think too highly of us either.

  64. Lo says:

    Lo feels that simply dating could be considered a test drive and LookingGlassSB feels that a SB should not even give me the time of day without a gift. These women really do believe that they are the more valuable person in the arrangement, and should be given a gift or allowance for that reason alone

    Ugh please stop putting words in my mouth. I never said one person was more valuable than the other. Kudos to you that your time is worth more than mine because you make a higher salary–but that doesn’t change the fact that I don’t have time to go on several dates before you finally make up your mind about me. I honestly think you’re in the minority because usually it doesn’t take man a long time to figure out if they’d want an arrangement or not. Every guy I’ve been on a first meet with, whether I accepted the arrangement or not has wanted to go through with something. And yes that includes the guys who desire the outings, dinners, art galleries/museums, weekend trips etc as part of their arrangement. I feel the same way as all the guys on here who say “please don’t waste my time with endless emails/texts”, except my version is please don’t waste my time with endless dates before you ultimately make a decision or pass me off cuz you decided at the last minute that you’re not feeling it.

  65. Jersey Darling says:

    @FatBastard: “While I have found a SB through the site, I found the process of meeting SB’s from the site very disappointing and MUCH less fun than I imagined when I first started. I have never tried online dating and was wondering if someone familiar with both would be willing to discuss which was the more enjoyable experience. The reason I ask is that many men say the problem with online dating sites is the large ratio of men/women, however the reverse is true with SA. I was curious if the ratio is the common factor.”

    Oh boy, let me preface this by saying now that I may as well don myself the regular online dating expert considering I’ve been doing it for 9+ years.

    Since men are visual creatures, I have one picture of myself I’ll use for comparison purposes. It is a picture of a very voluptuous me in a sexy red dress with an alluring look that is probably the best picture I’ve ever had taken of me. It oozes sex appeal without screaming whore. On a dating website like plentyoffish, if I post that picture I’ve gotten 100+ messages a day.

    When I first joined here, I used that picture knowing it is pretty much the hottest I could possibly look – trust me, this picture is spectacular. Yet I got maybe 5 messages my first day here and it died off quickly after. Why you ask? I think my profile showing that I was not a pay for play type of girl had a lot to do with it.

    Which type of dating do I find more frustrating? The answer will surprise you. I find both sugar dating when taken in the context of seeking an arrangement and traditional dating equally bad. Both make me want to forget men altogether and go back to focusing on my career, my hobbies, or anything where my time is spent productively furthering myself.

    And it’s not for lack of meeting good men – I’ve met good men in both places. But ultimately, finding chemistry with someone you are on the same page as just isn’t easy. And if you actively pursue it for too long, or even inactively pursue it simply by leaving a profile posted, you will get tired of it after a while.

    Lately I’ve been preferring arrangements. Communication is more open, the courting game is expedited, the experience is liberating sexually and emotionally (to me), and even though you put up with more bull in a shorter amount of time, the potential reward is greater.

    Regarding slowing it down, I have never had a fear of being used as “arm candy” because if I am spending time to know you, guess what? It’s because I actually enjoy spending time with you. And I agree with FatBastard that I don’t get where most of the girls on this site possibly get the idea they are arm candy (some are exceptions of course but not the majority of average lookers I’ve seen). I’m happy to let the arrangement evolve organically over time and won’t be hurt if I spend three weeks on getting to know you and it doesn’t happen, as long as you have not lied or misled me. That said, I’ll be very straightforward here. Treating a woman well is an aphrodisiac. We need that. So whether it’s that you’re courting us and treating us like a whole human being with emotional and mental needs while you get to know us, or you are helping us financially to expedite that courtship by providing the sense of stability that so many women biologically crave, it WILL make intimacy happen sooner. Give a gesture that is an amount (say $500) that is inconsequential to you but will mean a lot to her. See if it warms her up. I’m not saying that women are motivated by money, but that money is a way of demonstrating that you are serious and signals that she should start getting ready to demonstrate it as well if you are both on the same page.

    On the “time is money” point, I’ve made this point before – who’s time is more valuable, the man who makes $1000 an hour or the woman who OWES money by the hour while she is going through college? That’s right ladies, suck it up. Yes we all know that politically correctly speaking everyone’s time is valuable and we are all equals in the universe, but when it comes to associating money to that time, the sugar daddy’s time is worth more than yours. Don’t cry because he wants to get to know you over a few dates. Consider it as a sign that he’s actually into you, and if it’s not worth it to you, then simply move on. For all the trolling Beck did, he used a phrase I love – start thinking “long-term greedy” and less instant gratification.

    Sweetie makes the best point here that hits closest to home IMO – everyone is trying not to get suckered. But if everyone has their guard up so that they don’t get hurt, no one gets anywhere. I just went through an experience where I spent 10 hours getting to know someone on the site long distance (over the phone) and he was going to fly in to see me. The day came and he never showed up, and while he gave an excuse at first that prolonged the inevitable, he ultimately never showed up. While I have no idea what his motivation was, do I regret the time spent getting to know him? No, because I enjoyed talking to him and felt that even without meeting him, he added value to my life. Does it suck that he didn’t show up, was probably a fake and it’s made me more hesitant to want to give the next person a similar chance? It sure does, but I won’t let myself close off. Someone has to be willing to make themselves vulnerable. It was a chance to take and it didn’t pan out, but maybe next time it will and wouldn’t it be a shame if I missed that opportunity just because I was afraid of wasting my time?

    Going to catch up on posts now, hopefully I won’t have more to add to this!

  66. Rosie says:

    @All

    I need to clarify that I do not personally know if the quality of SDs on SA has deteriorated. Similar to Dorky’s, my SA experience is dated. My feedback is based solely on what others have shared on the blog as well as what my girlfriend (whom is currently seeking an arrangement and has a profile on SA) has shared with me.

    Going back up to read and catch up now…

  67. Principium says:

    Traditional online dating:

    I was going to write a War & Peace on this one, but since it is sooo nice out there, i decided to go lay out and enjoy this fine Sunday afternoon, but briefly:

    IT IS A COMPLETE SHIIIT SHOW for guys, unless you want to completely BS about every aspect of yourself are a true player, in which case, you will do much better IRL if you have that sort of game and people skills! If men just get used to telling pretty lies on the Internet and wallow in their own deceptions, they will just be self-banished to taking care of their own boners on porn sites!

    I often tell platonic female friends of slightly better than average looks but with a slightly bruised heart just to go post up a profile online (Match, E Harmoney, POF) so to build their damaged egos very quickly through man worship and incessant validation. If you ladies can get it, then good on ya! But you won’t catch me dead on those sites (I may soon qualify for a free membership with Senior Dating DOT com as I enter my AARP phase of life 😉 ) The ratios are so imbalanced that it lead Brandon Wade come up with an idea we now call SA 😀

    There was a study and an experiment conducted by a very devious blogger on OK Cupid, He created ten fake profiles, five men and five women of increasing physical attractiveness, and measured the response rate he received over a four-month period. The experiment: How many unsolicited messages do men get compared to women? And what difference does their physical attractiveness make to each man and woman’s success? The caveat? All dummy accounts had the same profile description. ALL OF THEM!

    The results after 24 hours showed that the two hottest women were instantly barraged with suitors, while the men, even the good-looking ones, struggled to get an looks. Each woman received at least one message, but the two best looking women received 581% more messages than the other three combined. For the second-hottest chick, 1 in 3 men who viewed her profile sent her a message. For the second-hottest man, 1 in 10 women who viewed his profile sent him a message. Only one man received any messages.

    I don’t wish to copy & paste the cr*p as to me the objective of the experiment is akin to proving to me that I need Oxygen to survive! But for those interested, here is the link (I suppose it is OK to post links? If not, apologies in advance))

    http://jonmillward.com/blog/attraction-dating/cupid-on-trial-a-4-month-online-dating-experiment/

  68. FatBastardSD says:

    @Principium

    The only evil here is that which you bring yourself!

    You and traderJ seem like good guys, hence you both deserve to have a plentiful bounty of pretty intelligent women cumming to you (notice I replaced coming with cumming, man I am funny).

  69. Principium says:

    Just when I thought I was out… You (SA bloggers) pull me back in 😉

    Missed me much? I gotta tell you that it feels great to be off the site (as an active POT SD) yet getting email messages from those who have come to know me and we have started a direct line of communication. As stated before, I really had wished that I had taken the time to read these blogs when I had originally joined the site. With that said, I have had a chance to visit with some family, decompress a bit (it was quite hectic on here last week with the Becky shenanigans and also with me being like warm toward remaining active on the site) and since I saw a topic which is near and dear to my hear, if you do not mind, I will make an appearance from my self-imposed retirement. Also, as an attention wh*re that I am, you ladies have been far too nice to me (not you Nicey!)

    OK before my thoughts, just a couple of quick points:

    @ Rosie, I don’t do Runyon Cyn as I am about 100 miles south of there. But you have the LLL part down pat. If you ever come down further south (may be a semi sexual innuendo) we can go explore some of the finest trails where I’m at and let me tell you that Runyon doesn’t hold a candle. Heck if we are (un)lucky, we may see some real cougars too!

    @ FB: What the heck was that sh*t Chinese curse good luck wish you out on my (and TJ’s) a**??!!! Deserve what’s coming to us? What is coming to us, the plague of Black Death? Relax my brethren! I’m going to be Five-O soon and I may have 5-6 more years on unassisted loving left in my. Let me enjoy my Silver-Fox phase without you wishing me the Chinese “luck”

    @ DianaSB: Well, where’s that half finished email? If you wish, you can send it by snail mail. I don’t mind that either 😉 Also, if you like this blog persona better than my other personas, it’s cool too. We can just blogmance till Spicey returns from wherever the sand she is getting in her pants. Then, I may have to be unfaithful to you!

    I will write my verbose opinion about traditional online dating in the next post as otherwise this post will end up being like 2 pages long! But before I forget, I really liked Rosie’s response to the “Arm Candy” question, sh*t test or whatever. My recommendation to guys is to always know your ABC’s meaning to Always Be Charming. There is a game (pick up) concept known as “agreeing & amplifying” This shows that you don’t get all pissy and perturbed by some sh*t an SB throws at you. Arm candy? Heck, you are like a Rolex Daytona! In fact better than my Rolex Daytona which I love.

    To be cont…

  70. FatBastardSD says:

    @DorkyGuy

    That’s how I assumed I had spotted a hustler right away as in this case neither side had an advantage. I do see another point of view though, one which may be hard for a SD with an ego to consider:

    Lo feels that simply dating could be considered a test drive and LookingGlassSB feels that a SB should not even give me the time of day without a gift. These women really do believe that they are the more valuable person in the arrangement, and should be given a gift or allowance for that reason alone. I do not think they see themselves as hustlers in any way. I think many SB’s feel the same way (I have met a few as well).

    This is why I think it is hard for many SD’s (myself included) to find an arrangement through the site. Can you build a enjoyable relationship where one person honestly feels the other is of lesser value?

  71. DorkyGuy says:

    @FB~ I will avoid drawing a comparison between current SBs and past SBs, because my experience is a little dated, and I really don’t know the current quality of SBs on the site. When I was actually active, SB with similar goals to mine were rare. However, P4P SBs have always seemed to be plentiful.

    I will say this… I agree with your approach of letting intimacy evolve in lockstep with gifting. If a gal wants to “take it slow” on the intimacy side, she really doesn’t have a leg to stand on if the gent wants to “take is slow” on the gifting side as well. If both sides advance in lockstep, then neither side need feel anxiety, or feel that they are being “used”.

    Lots of other guys on here have said exactly the same thing. You are in plenty of good company on that approach.

  72. Ayr says:

    “Many SB’s look down on the SD’s using the site. Especially the professional SB’s.”

    And vice versa, i would imagine, no? That’s why it is a match made in heaven.

  73. Ayr says:

    Fatty, How much was the allowance for this model?

    I have SB dated a kink.com model, outside of this forum. Was good but she flaked out.

  74. Ayr says:

    Fatty, What is wrong with a professional SB? Isn’t being a SB a job?

  75. I haven’t given up, though. There are good men out there.

  76. Here’s one for you: Don’t stand the Sugar Baby up. A few months ago, a man I was contacted by through SA planned a date with me just to not show up. I waited in a train station in Braintree for an hour waiting for this jerk.

  77. Ayr says:

    Lo, Why wouldn’t you do a 70 year old?

  78. sweetie says:

    I think everybody tries to make sure they don’t get suckered. It does get tiring being cautious all the time, however, that’s the game. Ideally, everybody wants somebody whom they’re attracted to, though. It makes the arrangement easier. The ones who state they want arm candy, well, that’s what they want and there are SBs out there who don’t mind being that for them. The rest, we just hope for the better. Personally, I’d rather wait than be with somebody I know I shouldn’t be with. It’s not just about the money.

  79. FatBastardSD says:

    @LookingGlassSB

    You can already see my original point from our posts.

    You think I am could be using the SA site to find a hot GF to be seen with in public because I am a loser with no other options.

    I think you have the attitude of a “professional” SB hustler.

    Neither might be true, but look at how we view things.

  80. FatBastardSD says:

    @Lo

    Beauty is in the eye of the beholder! I do agree that with high levels of beauty often come high levels of drama!

    My point was I think there are very few SB’s on the site who should really be concerned that a guy wants to meet with them only because he wants to be seen having a coffee with a stunning beauty. Even I have the ability to get a woman to have a coffee/drink with me. All I have to do is mention the words “platonic friend”!

  81. Lo says:

    Fatbastard maybe not everyone has the same perception of beauty as you? I’ve seen guys go as far as saying “please no model or actresses” on their profiles because of the high maintenance drama girls in the industry have caused them in the past.

  82. FatBastardSD says:

    @LookingGlassSB

    No I am not a male model. Are you telling me that you regularly date male models? Do most SB’s regularly date male models actors and professional athletes? If so why would they (you) be on the SA site?

    I am sorry you feel that the guy took advantage of you. You say you did not have intercourse, was that part of the agreement you made with him, or did he just want to cuddle?

  83. FatBastardSD says:

    @ Other SD posters.

    The women here seem to think that the new generation of SD’s is the problem (I think I would be included in this category as I don’t give first date gifts). I have a question. Was the SB “quality” better in the past? I have had a brief arrangement with a very beautiful SB from the site, the allowance was high but it was somewhat of a fantasy arrangement (how many guys ever get to “date” a model/actress) but I do wonder why many of the SB’s on the SA expect an allowance at all much less the amounts they ask for.

    P.S. I am not saying all the SB’s are bad, many on this blog would make great SB’s!

  84. LookingGlassSB says:

    Yeah, I mean, I don’t EXPECT him to bring gift. But if he does then he’s definitely in my favor and I’ll be more likely to want to continue relations with him. Like I said, if giving a gift on the first meeting is a problem. YOU SHOULDN’T BE A SUGAR DADDY. PERIOD. END OF DISCUSSION.

    For the record, once I decide to meet up, I do not flake out. I can’t remember the last time I did or if I ever did. Honestly. And i’ve met quite a few as I’ve mentioned.

    FatBastard (there some reason for why you picked that particular username? I’m quite curious..):
    I’ve had experiences where the guys who wanted to get intimate basically on the first date (often it was because of distance). I had a guy do this (we didn’t have intercourse but did cuddle and sleep together) and promised to give me a gift of $500 and then when i asked for it he went back on his word. It was VERY unpleasant and I never want that to happen again.

    “I do get it. Many SB’s look down on the SD’s using the site. Especially the professional SB’s. ”

    Quite frankly that ATTITUDE is called NOT PUTTING UP WITH BULLSHIT. Trust me, I used to not have that ATTITUDE but that was when I younger and had only been on the site for a short time.

    “To be blunt from the SB’s I have meet and the profiles I have seen, VERY FEW SB’s should have this attitude based on their looks alone, but that is only my opinion”
    Really? And that’s not a bad attitude to have? Pray tell, are you a male model? Whey should these girls even give you the time of day then?

  85. Rosie says:

    “There are a large percentage of of FAKE SDs who use the site to find a hot gf, making false promises just to get her to meet up with them.” -LookingGlassSB

    Unfortunately, that seems to be the underlying root of the problem. When I was sugar dating and using SA (when it wasn’t as well-known), the quality of SDs were better. I never expected or asked for a gift or an allowance for first dates, but most (not all) of my dates brought a small gift and if it was discovered throughout that first date that one or the other or both was not interested, you ended the night. It wasn’t so complicated. I would say sugar dating was treated more like real dating then…just with an accelerated mentality. As with anything, quality always get diluted when it becomes a numbers game. I think the quality is still there, it’s just a lengthier process to find it. :-/

  86. FatBastardSD says:

    @Lo & LookingGlassSB

    Everyone is looking for something different on the site and that is their choice. After this I can say that both of you are the type of SB that have made my experience on the site unpleasant.

    The SB’s time is money, so I should give a gift? I probably make two to three times her salary, yet my time is less valuable? The site is called “Seeking Arrangements” not sugar dating

    I do get it. Many SB’s look down on the SD’s using the site. Especially the professional SB’s. To be blunt from the SB’s I have meet and the profiles I have seen, VERY FEW SB’s should have this attitude based on their looks alone, but that is only my opinion. Does this attitude put off a lot of SD’s? Does it attract the kind of SD’s that cause the problems that many SB’s complain about?

  87. LookingGlassSB says:

    @Rosie, thanks. Yeah it’s been very difficult. I’ve just moved to the Los Angeles area so I’m increasing the probability that I’ll find something that will work. I have a problem with the guy being too old though. I just find it a bit disgusting if he’s over 50. Of course, personality trumps all of that.

  88. LookingGlassSB says:

    On that note………yes SDs, you WILL have to spend some money in the searching process. It’s part of it. And if that’s a problem for you well……need I say more? I will. If that’s a problem for you, you definitely shouldn’t be a sugar daddy in the first place. There are a large percentage of of FAKE SDs who use the site to find a hot gf, making false promises just to get her to meet up with them.

  89. LookingGlassSB says:

    Lo: “fatbastard i don’t blame those SB’s for not wanting to date without an arrangement. They probably felt like you wanted to take them for a test drive. And this is sugar dating…so dating without sugar..kind of defeats the whole purpose of an arrangement.”

    I agree 100%. Don’t be turned off if she demands a gift on the first meet. It’s good to show her your generosity up front. It only serves to increase positive relations with her and increases the probability of new arrangement getting off the ground and becoming successful.

    SEE FIRST BULLET ON BLOG POST: Time is money -just because she’s a young woman and a Sugar Baby does not mean she doesn’t deserve the same respect as one of your business colleagues. Time is money for her also.

  90. Rosie says:

    @LookingGlassSB

    Sorry you’ve had such bad experiences. :-( It can be exhausting, but screen…screen…screen. It’s sad that the quality of SDs on SA has gone downhill so much.

  91. LookingGlassSB says:

    ” Only if he makes it a point to make her feel that’s all she’s good for, I guess. But If she wants to be treated and viewed as more, she’s responsible for bringing the rest to the table too.”

    I can understand why she may have felt used……..he more than likely was not coming through financially for her. She probably felt the give and take between the two were unequal. There is a point where each must start bringing the sugar for it to work. Both must be generous in that respect. He was probably not holding up his end of the bargain adequately.
    Perhaps he wasn’t handsome or an older guy and she didn’t want to be seen with him without getting as much as she believed she deserved

  92. Rosie says:

    “The SB has the concern that she is being used as “arm candy” while dating (which I find idiotic, but other posters have mentioned this concern)…” -FatBastardSD

    Used as arm candy? Really? I guess I missed those posts. Past dating history and how a woman has been treated by men in general throughout her life probably plays a significant role in how women feel about the phrase, “arm candy”. I, personally, have never found it to be offensive. In fact, quite the contrary. I just know the candy you’re getting inside the wrapper is like an everlasting gobstopper! 😉 Lol, I know that sounds sexual, but that’s not what I mean. Well, not entirely. What I mean is that a woman should have the confidence to know she’s the whole of the sweet, delicious candy, not just the wrapper. So is it such a bad thing for a man to want to wear a beautiful woman on his arm like a Rolex? Only if he makes it a point to make her feel that’s all she’s good for, I guess. But If she wants to be treated and viewed as more, she’s responsible for bringing the rest to the table too. If you want the man to be interested in what you’re saying, be interesting. If you want the man to laugh with you, be funny. Bring it all.

  93. LookingGlassSB says:

    I actually don’t send out a lot of emails. I know that the ratio of SBs to SDs on the site is very unproportional but I just let them email me. I get about an average of one email per week. Probably closer to two. Being in a large metro area helps quite a bit I will say. Unfortunately I still haven’t found a long term arrangement but it’s really hard to find something like that. I really don’t think $5K/mo is unreasonable but I’m willing to negotiate. However, I do not bullshit, and if he’s not meeting my needs I let him know. He can then decide to accommodate me or move on. I have a boyfriend, I don’t need the emotional side of it and because of that, married men are more attractive to me.
    It’s a means to an end for me. I’m not a frivolous spender and I’m professional in all ways.

  94. Lo says:

    fatbastard i don’t blame those SB’s for not wanting to date without an arrangement. They probably felt like you wanted to take them for a test drive. And this is sugar dating…so dating without sugar..kind of defeats the whole purpose of an arrangement.

  95. LookingGlassSB says:

    Sorry I meant they violated almost all of the DON’Ts

    Dont’ know what’s wrong with me….i keep leaving out words…must be the stress of the end of the semester creeping up on me

  96. LookingGlassSB says:

    I’m so glad they made this blog post. I’ve had to deal with sugar daddy’s who violated all most all of the do’s. All pot SDs who get on the site should have to read this blog post. It should be mandatory.
    I’m a white female but I’ve even had some guy I met off here be extremely rude to me because of some things he saw written on my profile and he didn’t like. Just…wow.

  97. FatBastardSD says:

    @Rosie

    I agree with you high expectations on both sides. I think a fear of being used plays a very large role as well.

    A lot of SB’s wanted the romantic element to develop over time which I agreed with. My view that we should date for a while without no arrangement until that time met with MUCH resistance from the vast majority of SB’s I met. The SB has the concern that she is being used as “arm candy” while dating (which I find idiotic, but other posters have mentioned this concern) , while I was concerned that the SB was a hustler (perhaps just as idiotic a view), with no intention of having a romantic relationship.

    This attitude going in often made the underlying dynamic unpleasant for me, which is why I won’t use the site in the future.

  98. Rosie says:

    @FatBastardSD

    To answer the question: I have participated in both; traditional online dating sites and SA. Both were enjoyable, but traditional dating was a lot more fun. Less pressure, I think. Perhaps it was purely psychosomatic, but I felt I had the upper-hand in some ways with traditional dating sites as opposed to SA. I think in both cases, each person goes in with a specific list of what they are looking for, but in arrangements, there’s generally no budging on what you want/don’t want whereas in traditional dating, if you really like someone, you tend to bend a little more because you’re thinking long-term so compromise plays a bigger role. Make sense?

  99. Rosie says:

    Best of luck to you, Treasured!

    Lo – if you think you can’t do it…don’t.

  100. Rosie says:

    *ratio

  101. Rosie says:

    “While I have found a SB through the site, I found the process of meeting SB’s from the site very disappointing and MUCH less fun than I imagined when I first started. I have never tried online dating and was wondering if someone familiar with both would be willing to discuss which was the more enjoyable experience. The reason I ask is that many men say the problem with online dating sites is the large ratio of men/women, however the reverse is true with SA. I was curious if the ratio is the common factor.” -FatBastardSD

    In an effort to help revive the blog, here is my wrong answer: Whether it’s SA dating or traditional dating, I think the problem has more to do with unrealistic expectations and less to do with ration of men/women.

  102. Lil_tm says:

    “I’ve been thinking, the chief cause of conflict on SA, and on this board is this:

    Some women view this as dating, with a little sugar on the side

    Some women view this as sugar, with friendly sexual encounters and other charming entertainments

    If there were a profile classification that made it clear what people are doing, and looking for, it would make filtering much easier!

    Off to the airport for sand and sun – have fun sugars.”

    If only it were that easy! Unfortunately most people will say whatever is required to get what they want rather that just being themselves. So, although it’s a great idea, the filtering process is ultimately people showing themselves in the best light.

    This is where we have to use our common sense. And lucky for us, I believe there are plenty of people on this site who have some semblance of intelligence. :)

  103. Lil_tm says:

    “DON’T: Compare Your Current SB to A Past Arrangement”

    is kind of strange though. Why not? If your last SB did something you like ask the current one to do likewise. If she does not want to find someone who will OR learn to live with it.

    There’s a way of addressing your wants and desires without making the current girl feel self conscious. Don’t say a past SB did it, just say it’s something you enjoy. :)

  104. Lo says:

    Treasured bring that ass back here

    a seventy year old contacted me on the site. I don’t think I can do it !

  105. FatBastardSD says:

    Here is a question I would like answered (I know the correct answer already I just want to read some wrong ones).

    While I have found a SB through the site, I found the process of meeting SB’s from the site very disappointing and MUCH less fun than I imagined when I first started. I have never tried online dating and was wondering if someone familiar with both would be willing to discuss which was the more enjoyable experience. The reason I ask is that many men say the problem with online dating sites is the large ratio of men/women, however the reverse is true with SA. I was curious if the ratio is the common factor.

    P.S. I don’t plan on using regular online dating but I was curious and the blog has died down a bit.

  106. Treasured says:

    Hi all :)

    I just did something I thought I would not do for a long time: I closed off my profile on SA.
    To be honest, kept in “just in case” for quite some time. But just realised, that, at least for now, I don’t need it anymore.
    Will try to stay off the blog too. It had provided entertainment, but I think blog topics have exhausted themselves over a few years (I had to look through most of them, when I was looking for one particular person posting 😀 )

    Big kiss and mwaaah 😀

  107. fly says:

    @spicey “If there were a profile classification that made it clear what people are doing, and looking for, it would make filtering much easier!”

    Far too many profiles have way too much about the poster (often not really relevant to the sb/sd relationship) and not enough thought about what they are looking for. Perhaps if SA reversed the order so that the poster listed what they were looking for first and then the personal description it would help.

    It’s much easier to do a good analysis if you understand the goal (or problem) first.

    Might also help the reader do better self screening. ………………….

  108. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars!
    I see the blog died down a lot

    Hope everyone is having a great weekend

  109. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Pricincipium~

    “Finally @ Diana: If I didn’t scare you off enough through the private email channels, you have my email addy. if I did and you like this more relaxed version of me better, I may pop in once in a while to say hello and make sure that you are (mis)behaving.”

    Noooo don’t leave us!! FB is going to smother us all with his moobs and if we don’t do it properly he’ll say ” YOU’RE WRONG” or something like that. hehe

    I had written you a reply,or maybe I should say half way written, ran out to run errands and when I returned “profile deleted”. I’ll send you a message to the email you provided:)

    Me misbehave? Aww I spend some days with XXX Vitamin Water and a Hitachi wand. Totally innocent here:)

    Btw It was amazing today. I walked outside and thought “huh?” where is the usual overcast dreary weather that we’ve experienced all week? Gorgeous day out!! It’s a shame I wasn’t enjoying more of it:(

  110. Jersey Darling says:

    @Sweetie thank you! It should go without saying but you can feel free to email me if you’d ever like to as well.

    Dorky… have you never been bored during coitus? Haha… I have!

  111. Rosie says:

    Lol, Dorky! You have a point there. Then again, reading The Economist can be a real mindf**k. 😉

  112. sweetie says:

    JD, I passed on your email to P.

  113. sweetie says:

    Hehehe, Dorky. Or, the f’ing was so lame, Economist or not.

  114. DorkyGuy says:

    Having an interest in etymology, that phrase “bored out of my f***ing mind” has always struck me as peculiar. If your mind was f’ing, how could it possibly be bored? Unless maybe it was reading the Economist at the same time.

  115. Rosie says:

    Final weekend of vacation and I’m stuck waiting for furniture deliveries. Bored out of my f***ing mind!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  116. Rosie says:

    “@Rosie – People are no shows to meetings in all walks of life, normal dating and SA dating included. This is not something a blog can cure…” -FatBastardSD

    Yeah, I’m very aware. Wasn’t suggesting it as a cure all; just a blog topic that might be helpful. That’s all.

  117. Jersey Darling says:

    @FatBastard – So ominous! Lol

  118. FatBastardSD says:

    @ Capitol P
    @ TraderJ

    Hope you guys get what is coming to you!

  119. FatBastardSD says:

    @Rosie

    People are no shows to meetings in all walks of life, normal dating and SA dating included. This is not something a blog can cure. Some advice (which I think applies to dating in general):

    I prefer lunch time meets, or happy hour meets at establishments that I enjoy frequenting. I can eat lunch or an appetizer, read my email, surf the net, and watch a sporting event. If the SB shows up it is a bonus (no need for a 20 minute rule). Attempting to accomodate BOTH the SB and my schedule/location has proven very effective in reducing the flaking. If you come across as a tyrant in scheduling and planning the location of the meet you are not doing yourself any favors. If a SB flakes with a good reason then I have taken to approach that Lo described, she will have to travel to me at my convenience.

    @Noob_SD

    Do not waste time with messages/email/phone calls in order to correct behavior you don’t like. Move on and find someone else. Again this seems like regular dating advise.

  120. Rosie says:

    “…you’re gonna have to drive up to LA and buy me a drank.” -Lo

    That’s funny! Shows a good sense of humor and willingness to give you a second chance!

  121. Rosie says:

    @Angela (and any other blog topic writers)

    I haven’t checked the archives so maybe a post like this already exists, but I would like to make a suggestion for an upcoming blog topic. If it does exist, please disregard. Based on Noob_SD’s recent no-show and other bad first arrangement date experiences shared here, maybe a write-up on SD/SB FIRST DATES would be valuable? Kind of like a ‘how-to’ and tips? For example:

    What if…

    …SD/SB doesn’t show up for the date?

    Wait no more then 20 minutes and leave. Don’t call or text to find out why SB/SD is late; SD/SB should be reaching out to you because (s)he is the tardy one. If SD/SB is late for your first date or a no-show, (s)he is probably not worth sticking around for. (Caveat: sometimes there is a valid explanation so reaction would be case by case, use your best judgment)

    …There’s no chemistry or date is a flop?

    Be upfront and tell SB/SD the date isn’t working out. Don’t say you’ll call when when you know you aren’t going to. Thank SB/SD for coming, say goodbye and leave.

    Etc.

  122. Lo says:

    princ–homelier side of scales? lol

    one time I HAD to flake on a first meet, and afterwards the pot SD was like if you still wanna meet you’re gonna have to drive up to LA and buy me a drank.

  123. Noob_SD says:

    @Principium – This is not in L.A. And thanks for the advice. I am trying to learn as much as I can from you guys.

    @Rosie – Yes, I do see your point.

  124. Rosie says:

    “@ Rosie & LG: It was always a pleasure to read your opinions and sage words of wisdom.” -Capitol P

    Best of luck to you! I’m in SoCal part-time so maybe I’ll run into you at a Trader Joe’s or hiking Runyon. I’ll look for the guy with a 6 pack in Lulu Lemon pants! 😉

  125. Rosie says:

    “From what I am hearing, there are a few fake SDs on here. I don’t blame the SBs for being nervous, cautious.” -Noob_SD

    In the same breath, Noob, there are a lot of fake and flake SBs on the site too based on what I’ve read on the blogs as well as what SD friends have shared with me. Although I think your message to her was a classy move, I also think you rewarded her bad behavior, which perpetuates the flake SB’s actions. :-( Just because there are fake and flake SDs on the site, does not mean you should be punished for their actions at all. You did your part and showed up. Your time is valuable and she wasted it. A disrespectful move on her part. Anyway, I say this with all due respect and hope you see my point when I say you gave her more than she deserved. :-/

  126. Principium says:

    @ Noob, Did this POT SB happen to be from LA? Your description of that SB is so similar to someone whom I had corresponded with, i.e, well-traveled, very articulate, a bit feisty in her writings and intellectually sharp. The one I’m thinking of was petite. and although the looks were a bit on the homely side of the scales, she seemed to have plenty of other important qualities above mere looks. Again if the same person, I never got as far as scheduling something but had a few great email messages. She then disappeared and I believe the profile is now gone. My advice to you is that this is certainly a learning curve and you may need to try a few attempts (try to take some time off in between) to comprehend and to gauge the dynamics of the SD/SB paradigm more substantively.

    There are some great posters on here and although I was merely on here (blogs) for a brief time, I wish that I was not such a knuckle head and had read plus participated in the blogs when I had originally joined in the Winter of 2011.

    @ Trader J: If you ever come back and read this, i wish you the best with your POT SB as I found you to be sincere, erudite and quite helpful with a strong radar for BS. I think that someone compatible who hitches their VW to your Rolls Phantom ( 😉 ) is gonna be in for an exciting double-ride with a Gent.

    @ BG & Sweetie: You two have my email address and both are very sweet. If someone does ask for me, please give out my email address at your discretion. I think both of you have good judgement and are discreet.

    @ Nicey: Maybe your kinky SD just wants a small refund as a down payment on a pacemaker which he may need to keep up with you. If you get bored with him, we’ll buy some whipped cream and you can rub it all over my abs and I’ll use my cream and rub it all over your %*#@$%&^! Deal?

    @ Beck: Don’t be such a tool at times and try to use your intelligence more positively. Not quite sure why you like to play some sort of villain or vigilante, but if as I keep insisting you are not a female, then grow a bigger (real) pair IRL instead of playing coy on an unsuspecting forum. Your happy alter ego was a better gig than your darker side alter ego.

    @ Dorkey & FB: Best of luck guys.

    @ Rosie & LG: It was always a pleasure to read your opinions and sage words of wisdom.

    Finally @ Diana: If I didn’t scare you off enough through the private email channels, you have my email addy. if I did and you like this more relaxed version of me better, I may pop in once in a while to say hello and make sure that you are (mis)behaving.

    I have decided to delete my profile 2 days early and enjoy this sunny beautiful So. Cal weather for a little bit longer.

    Adios, au revoir, goodbye and many happy trails,

    Capitol P xo

  127. Lo says:

    I know noob and it sucks

  128. Noob_SD says:

    On herpes: I will share what I know. All of us need to be educated about it. There is a nice Wikipedia entry on it.

    Herpes is not uncommon – in its simplest form it appears as cold sores or fever blisters and can be transmitted through any skin-to-skin contact. There is no cure for it – once you have it, you have it for life – the virus lies dormant in the body and certain events trigger an outbreak. There is also genital herpes which is less common. Condoms offer moderate protection against it. Best way to prevent transmission would be abstaining from sex when the outbreak occurs. As far as I know, there are no tests for it.

  129. Noob_SD says:

    @Rosie “That was quite a gentlemanly gesture on your part that I’m not sure the SB who stood you up deserved. But kudos on keeping it classy!”

    From what I am hearing, there are a few fake SDs on here. I don’t blame the SBs for being nervous, cautious. I am guessing, her intuition made the decision at the last minute. Part of my disappointment was because I was looking forward to meeting her :) – well traveled for her age, articulate in communications, sounded like an intellectual. Told her that too. Hope she finds what she is looking for.

  130. Treasured says:

    @Kitty I HOPE THIS GETS NOTICED
    In between feeding the trolly.

    Take a photo which would show you only partially – make it profile. And add other ones to your private picture gallery.

  131. Jersey Darling says:

    I swear this blog is bipolar. Either it’s exploding with comments or entirely silent!

  132. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “3. POT makes lunch date (appointment?). No show. I write nice letter back wishing good luck, but at least don’t waste people’s time in future.” -Noob_SD

    That was quite a gentlemanly gesture on your part that I’m not sure the SB who stood you up deserved. But kudos on keeping it classy!

  133. FatBastardSD says:

    @DianaSBinOC

    “This one looked good. POT gives me email. I Google it and find the same on a herpes support network. Yes, 1 in 5 have herpes, but I’m not going there.”

    Pretty sure this was about a SB from Noob_SD’s post

    Sorry I need the attention.

  134. Spicey says:

    I’ve been thinking, the chief cause of conflict on SA, and on this board is this:

    Some women view this as dating, with a little sugar on the side

    Some women view this as sugar, with friendly sexual encounters and other charming entertainments

    If there were a profile classification that made it clear what people are doing, and looking for, it would make filtering much easier!

    Off to the airport for sand and sun – have fun sugars.

  135. DorkyGuy says:

    @Diana~ In retrospect, I framed the question poorly. I should have removed the “married” component, and replaced it with “if he has ever been head over heels in love with a woman”.

    I think that going through that teaches a person something about selflessness, and considering someone else’s needs that a person who has never invested themselves into someone may lack.

    I don’t disagree with you, and I think that some of the other replies were pretty spot on as well.

  136. DianaSBinOC says:

    @ Lo “2. This one looked good. POT gives me email. I Google it and find the same on a herpes support network. Yes, 1 in 5 have herpes, but I’m not going there.”

    omg…

    HAA!!! That’s absolutely terrible.Maybe you should message him about wanting to get tested before any intimacy occurs. Wouldn’t it be funny if he responded with ” but.. but I’m STD Free!” lol

  137. DianaSBinOC says:

    @ Principium:)

    “@ Diana, if I think you are who I wrote to before, I sent you another email which I’d welcome your reply to.”

    :) Look forward to chatting further:)

    ~ Married SD vs Single SDs being better lovers~
    I really don’t think it matters. Upper hand? I just don’t think in comparing the two in that way. It’s not a competition since some SBs will only seek married SDs for their time restraints and other SBs wouldn’t enjoy the sneaking around aspect of that type of relationship. Also “if he ever loved his wife”. eh again I would think if he did love his wife he probably wouldn’t be cheating on her in the first place but again I just don’t see the connection. Also many women are married to men that have never even assisted them with an orgasm. Some men are selfish lovers whether it be at home or out on the town with someone new. To add just because a man is single doesn’t necessarily mean he wasn’t married or has never been in a long term relationship. As it’s been noted men will stay in a marriage for the children, or because a divorce would be a major issue to his current financial standing. The same could be said of a wife that stays in a bad marriage for those financial benefits even if her orgasms are battery assisted. This site is a pretty obvious view of how a woman and man’s desire or needs differ. Or perhaps it’s what women place more value on that differs.

  138. DianaSBinOC says:

    @FatBastard-

    Not interested. Go find your “employees” if you need attention so bad:)

  139. Lo says:

    2. This one looked good. POT gives me email. I Google it and find the same on a herpes support network. Yes, 1 in 5 have herpes, but I’m not going there.

    omg…

  140. Principium says:

    Hi Sweetie, no of course I don’t mind. Go ahead and share with Jersey. For me, the departure is more of a personal time constraint issue rather than the hijacking or trolling of the blog.

    @ Diana, if I think you are who I wrote to before, I sent you another email which I’d welcome your reply to.

    Yes, I did read TJ’s last post and he def seems to have a bounce to his step 😉

    To everyone else (Becky exclided), be bad and misbehave 😀

  141. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “@Rosie, I will miss your contributions, they were fantastic.” -Jersey Darling

    That’s very sweet. I’m no longer in the sugar bowl and just a girl with a lot of experience with successful arrangements trying to help a good friend of mine. I’m on vacation from work this week and had time to check the blog out and only wanted to do so because my friend said she didn’t enjoy it. I think blogs and forums only suit certain personalities so not sure she is even cut out for this type of interaction sans cat conflicts! Not saying I’m gone for good. I’ll probably still lurk and if I feel my input can add any value, I’ll chime in. :-)

  142. sweetie says:

    Good idea, lovely. I owe him an email, anyway. Done deal, JD!

  143. Jersey Darling says:

    @Sweetie, you are as sweet as ever! To play it safe you can pass him mine – puffin 532 at gmail.

  144. sweetie says:

    JD, I have P’s email. You think he’ll mind if I pass it to you?

  145. Jersey Darling says:

    @FatBastard and Dorky: “To be fair look at it from the SB’s point of view. I would rather pull my own teeth than go to an office related party, what is a SB going to think?”

    Uhh, I *love* office parties! I think they’re a blast. But that’s just me 😀

  146. Jersey Darling says:

    Apparently everyone – Spicey, Rosie, Principium, and Trader J – are leaving the blog at the same time.

    Why guys, why?

    @Trader J, you can just go to blog.seekingarrangement.com. I for one will be expecting updates on the new quality girl you have met! And if you shared them here, perhaps you could make a better place.

    @Principium, I do not have your email so sad to see you go, I will miss your masked face.

    @Spicey – Have fun on your vacay! Enjoy the water for me.

    @Rosie, I will miss your contributions, they were fantastic.

  147. DorkyGuy says:

    @FatBastard~ lol, it wasn’t an office party. I don’t do office parties either. blech

  148. sweetie says:

    Everybody is leaving!!! Boo-hoo ;(

    TJ, you sound in love already!

  149. FatBastardSD says:

    @SDinLA

    I am the technical content nazi (related to the grammer and spelling nazi).

    The signal to noise ratio is low unless you count Becks posts as the signal.

  150. FatBastardSD says:

    @DorkyGuy

    To be fair look at it from the SB’s point of view. I would rather pull my own teeth than go to an office related party, what is a SB going to think?

    Now if it is the right party then believe me not only will you get the SB wanting to go but she will not even dare to mention being paid to do it. I speak from experience (happened once, in LA of course).

  151. SD says:

    good luck noob_sd

  152. FatBastardSD says:

    @DianaSBinOC

    I don’t believe you are familiar with the escort business based on your posts. Vegas business trips alone have provided enough exposure that I can say that what you write is wrong. I believe others have tried to point this out to you as well. Spicey has posted what she has learned the cut is for escorts from an agency.

    If you just want sex an escort will be a cheaper option than a SB. The argument that SB can easily ask for $3K+ because they could make more as an escort is dumb and I think paints a bad picture for SB’s reading the blog.

    As an example, SB’s post horrific stories of messages requesting/describing disgusting sex acts that they receive on SA from potential SD’s. Talk to a few escorts, these are the kind of sexual acts that they PERFORM for the money they make.

  153. Noob_SD says:

    I don’t have y’all’s experience. Still an SD virgin. But here’s a summary (about 30 days experience)

    1. Met one POT. Lunch. Talked about how great her previous SD was and now desperate she is because she needs a new one. Mom of three. I can empathize. But no chemistry.
    2. This one looked good. POT gives me email. I Google it and find the same on a herpes support network. Yes, 1 in 5 have herpes, but I’m not going there.
    3. POT makes lunch date (appointment?). No show. I write nice letter back wishing good luck, but at least don’t waste people’s time in future.
    4. I cancelled on a POT when she agreed to meet me at a place – said she is okay with it and wanted to change it to another place, another part of town, at the last minute. I was uneasy about that.
    5. Met POT two. I am on the fence on this one. She’s married. SugarDaddyDiary advice is not to go for the married SBs. As a Noob, with my lack of experience, I probably should heed that advice.
    6. Two POTs wanting to meet next week – time is a precious commodity. We’ll see if I am lucky.

  154. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    @TraderJ

    That sounds awesome. I can feel the excitement in your post! I’m happy for you and hope this one works out in all the ways you want – and I’m sure it will. You manifested her from your belief it would happen. (I know, sounds really hokey, but I’m one of those who believes in The Secret.)

    I know I was blip of a character on this blog – even though I’ve been quietly following for a bit – so you guys don’t know me, but I do wish the best for everyone here. :-)

  155. DianaSBinOC says:

    Aww Trader J is leaving the blog, although I’m excited to hear you may have found a match:) Yah!!

  156. DianaSBinOC says:

    @ Beck
    “I have used their service. They are great. These women charge between 1-2k PER HOUR for this. I am not making this shit up – you can go verify.”

    “What am I missing here?”

    I didn’t check the site but I’m pretty sure these ladies only see a select number of clients. The average rate for escorts is somewhere between 300-500. Well I suspect lower tier is probably about $250 per hr.

    Now since they are using their body I’m pretty sure they have to limit the amount of customers they see.

    From what I’ve read and the comments from the SDs there are escorts on this site as there are johns. The point is sleeping with one person and having an actual nsa relationship with that one person is reasonable at $3,000+ per month.

    If the SB feels like she’s being paid for sex then she is getting a raw deal.

  157. SD says:

    @dorky: That could happen. But on the afternoon reconfirming to come and then going to a party and not giving a notice. that is really bad behaviour.

  158. TraderJ says:

    From the life’s funny file…. My membership on SA expires on Monday… as I posted in the blog a while back I had received 279 (at that time) replies to my profile. Not more than a handful maybe ten did I reply to and even less than that went beyond the first email. I was very clear on exactly what I wanted and what I was offering and still the replies I got were all over the freakin place, in many cases its almost as if they never even read it. Or they would say they did read it but they were so cool and so awesome they could win me over, yeah right.

    I did send out a few emails myself over the last month and I was pretty specific on what I was looking for, age wise, location wise, and my emails to them spelled out pretty clearly the rest of my hoped for details. I also tried to make a point of not contacting anyone with either, bikini, lingerie or just chest shots that sort of thing. I realize that is a calculated risk as who knows what waits on the other side, but truth is I was just going under the assumption that those girls tied their self worth too much to how they looked and that really wasn’t what I was hoping to find.

    So imagine my surprise when this morning I received a reply to one of the emails I sent out in the first couple of days on the site. Said all the right things in her reply, found it hard to believe I was serious as she had pretty much given up on the site due to the lack of quality in people that were contacting her and she had come back today to close her account when she came across my email and decided to take a shot.

    We did the email exchange, sent a few emails back and forth, both thought it was eerie how closely our experiences mirrored each others on the site. We both were able to chat so we exchanged Skype IDs and just finished a great 45 minute wide ranging Skype video chat with her and to say she’s attractive (to my tastes of course) is an understatement both inside and out.

    Also quite funny both of us while on Skype without knowing the other was doing it, closed our accounts on SA ha ha…we’ve made plans to go for a hike on Tuesday afternoon and we will go from there.

    So for those that told me I needed to be more patient I guess you might be proven right if this pans out, but I like to think I have my vetting system down to a fine art so that I don’t bother with people that don’t look like a 90% or better possibility.

    What that also means is as the only time I came to the blog was from the “our blog” link on the main page of SA now that my account is closed it’s doubtful I will be back after this post. For those that want to keep in touch I did post an email back somewhere in this thread so feel free to use it if you so desire.

    I might pop back in on Tuesday just to give a final update to see if I am lucky enough to have found what I was seeking, but can’t promise that.

    Anyway I can honestly say that expect one person, it was interesting meeting everyone else, even if we didn’t or don’t have the same mindset or interests etc.. it is always nice to hear other points of view.

    Good luck to one and all and be careful out there.

  159. DorkyGuy says:

    @SD~ Get used to it… I once invited a SB to a charity function that started at a specific time.

    The starting time came and went, and I finally reached her 30 minutes after it started only to discover she was asleep, hung over from the night before.

  160. SD says:

    Hello all together.
    Back from a frustrating NON-SB date.
    Coz the SB wasn’t coming. After 15 minutes I called her and she said oh something came in between (Party).
    Such an inacceptable behaviour. Why they don’t call upfront.

  161. SDinLA says:

    *Peers into blog*

    This is worse than it was before our last troll got banned. Signal to noise ratio is way too high when half the posts are from the current troll and almost everyone seems to be happy humouring him by responding to his inanity.

    Guess I’ll check back in a while and see if he’s still being fed. This place is unreadable when it’s like this. Hope everyone has a wonderful weekend.

  162. DorkyGuy says:

    Reposting here because I missed a convo between WCSD and TraderJ in the last blog topic:

    @WCSD/TraderJ~ WCSD, I’m surprised you remember that! even I had forgotten!

    A while back, I built a Chrome/Firefox addon that does not only that, but adds a ton of features to the SeekingArrangement site as well. An example of one of the features was the ability to get all of the messages that you have traded with a profile in a popup window, and browse through them, GMail style.

    I submitted the sourcecode to Brandon in February of last year, but none of feature have been implemented since that time. I sent Brandon an email a few days back asking if they needed some help with the implementation, but have not received a reply.

  163. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Principium

    “Did we ever, you know ???”

    Haha no we didn’t. You sent me a message about a week ago yet I wasn’t sure how to respond. You used the “limbic system” in your message. That’s why I thought that it must be a catch all phrase on this site, that is until your masked photo was posted:)

  164. Noob_SD says:

    So looks like I missed a lot of the drama … :)

  165. Beck says:

    Spicey,

    Ok! Fine! FINE! I will take 4 (days in London) and think up a new character. I think it will be a variation on the theme of Beck I and not Beck II, as potential SD profiles get more kindness than the married guy who will never have an SB.

    Sweetie,

    Trust me, you are not the only one to have asked that question. I have gotten that question from women since kindergarten.

  166. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    Good luck on your sugary search, Principium! You seem like a wonderful catch for a girl seeking NSA. Hopefully one of your two pot SB dates will work out for you. If not, I imagine you hanging out at Lulu Lemon spending gobs of dinero on yoga pants, socks and underwear. 😉 I probably won’t be on the blog much either after this week. It was really fun being a part of it though (even with the Becky drama).

  167. FatBastardSD says:

    @TraderJ

    I never run 5K. I get tired driving 5K

    I only eat free range vegetables.

    Have you ever seen those documentaries how lions hunt a gazelle? If a lion does not give a shit about ethics then that tells me all I need to know.

    As for MADD. Mothers are pretty much against everything that is fun which is why we ignore everything they tell us to do. It’s a slippery slope, next thing you know they will have MASA with random checkpoints at hotels making sure people are not trying to sneak in SB’s.

    I am what I am, and that’s all that I am.

  168. Spicey says:

    Capitol P – now everyone will know that we’re really the same person as we’ll both be going blog silent at the same time …

  169. Principium says:

    @ Rosie : I would introduce you to my friend (who has a profile on SA), but I don’t feel she could keep things NSA for too long. I’m finding this out as I try to coach her through this lifestyle.

    I’m deleting my profile shortly after the premium phase expires on 4/22. Of course the major tease factor is that I normally get bombarded with sudden email messages as my membership expires (happened on both of the last two stints) simply because the profile gets exposure on the featured profile page (darn your cleverness SA! But I also got “discovered” by the Ex’s friend this way the last time) but I’m not falling for that one, this time around. It is not the 60 per month, it is the incessant time-mind “wanking” that ensues and that time element is the costliest of them all… I’m probably going to meet with one POT SB from here after the next weekend and I also have one other number from another POT (never met and rarely text with) who happens to live very close to me. The third POT (for those who have been keeping tracks) I have discarded after a phone convo the other night.

    With that said, I’m going to cut back on the blogs too as next week is going to be a very busy business week for me. This U.S. tax week of Apr 15th was slow and I needed a diversion, so thank you for all who paid attention to my verbiage.

    Also since it seems that most on here (SBs) have in one way or another come across me either in the past or present (maybe some IRL?): So if we have ehmmm you know, did something “spicey” together, please have the good discretion to share it will the rest of the sugars 😉

    Till then, P or Capitol P as I have become to be known of, will sneak back into the more organic sugar plantations (none derogatory term)

    Oh lastly, behave Becky and I depart while still convinced that you are a female. :)

  170. sweetie says:

    “Beck – No blog for you!”
    Spicey, the blog nazi 😉

  171. Spicey says:

    Beck – No blog for you! Two days! Come back as someone new and be real.

    The End

  172. sweetie says:

    Beck, my dear, what did we do to deserve you?

  173. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    Re: Beck – Totally agree with Spicey!

  174. Beck says:

    But that’s what they told me in the other blog, Spicey and TJ. That’s why I came here.

  175. sweetie says:

    Hi, people!
    Leftover drama, still?
    Nodding in disbelief and disappointment.

  176. TraderJ says:

    “If you intro’d yourself as “bored married guy looking for a thrill, afraid of my wife so I wanna play on the blog.” We’d all say welcome.”

    Yeah what she said up there ^^^^^^^

  177. Spicey says:

    Becky – how about this, you like the blog, you want to participate, but you’re even starting to bore me – and I believe I was the ONLY person who didn’t care that you were a troll.

    Start over! Take two days off and then come back as your real you: New name, new Gravatar, correct story and this time be more real.

    If you intro’d yourself as “bored married guy looking for a thrill, afraid of my wife so I wanna play on the blog.” We’d all say welcome.

  178. Spicey says:

    Re: the question: “I am curious has anybody actually seen FBSD I mean like his pic or IRL? I wonder if his nick is like when you have those massive hulks that people call “Tiny” and FBSD is really some rock hard ab gym rat.

    Treasured has seen him, she says he is not a mongrel.

  179. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    Perfect description of FatBastard, TraderJ! I love it. Well, it has been proven time and time again that women are drawn to men who exhibit bastard/jerk traits. Maybe that’s his MO? FBSD – care to enlighten us? Are you really a Fat Bastard or a Svelte Softy?

  180. TraderJ says:

    @ Rosie O’Gravy

    “That’s a hilarious thought! I have not seen his photo, but I’ve wondered the same thing. He’s probably all svelte and not a bastard at all.”

    Exactly I have this image of him just having finished his daily 5k run, had a couple of veggie shakes, sorting through his mail, catching up on how his sponsored child in Africa is doing, just about to head out to the Big Brothers event where he is BB of the year and on the way dropping his donation checks in the mail for PETA and MADD.

    With every post here he must have to edit it over and over again to get the round sound to keep up his inner bastard alive… every once in a while you see him slip in his posts and over really good info but then quickly tries to insult someone to cover it up hahaha.. I do believe he’s just a big old softy…

    “Oh, and the over-thinking thing? I do it all the time.”

    Yeah the second I realize I am putting too much thought into a post is the second I know it’s going to suck as now I’m thinking about. like that annoying kid in school that would hum some crap song that would stuck in my head all day.

  181. Beck says:

    Actually Rosie, Now that I think about it, why not get a SB for real? Hmmm, this blog may have changed my perspective on relationships.

  182. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “I am curious has anybody actually seen FBSD I mean like his pic or IRL? I wonder if his nick is like when you have those massive hulks that people call “Tiny” and FBSD is really some rock hard ab gym rat.” -TraderJ

    That’s a hilarious thought! I have not seen his photo, but I’ve wondered the same thing. He’s probably all svelte and not a bastard at all.

    Oh, and the over-thinking thing? I do it all the time.

  183. TraderJ says:

    @ Rosie O’Gravy “TraderJ – he had me at Fat. More of him to love! ;-)”

    Yeah you win, I totally over thought my comment, I was gonna make a Mike Myers reference, then an Austin Powers, reference, then I just wimped out and dropped a letter from JD’s comment…totally over the thought the hell out of that comment…

    I am curious has anybody actually seen FBSD I mean like his pic or IRL? I wonder if his nick is like when you have those massive hulks that people call “Tiny” and FBSD is really some rock hard ab gym rat.

  184. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    @TraderJ – he had me at Fat. More of him to love! 😉

  185. TraderJ says:

    @ Jersey Darling “@FatBastard, that’s not true. You had me at hello”

    He had me at “hell”

  186. Beck says:

    “And I’m sorry, at this point I’d need to be paid to put up with you.”

    I am ready to be a sugar daddy then! I am god damn proud of myself.

  187. Beck says:

    JD, How did you get the idea that I am banging the maid!? She is married for goodness sake and I rarely meet her anyway. I love her, because she does all the things viz. household chores that are the usual causes for stress and unpleasantness in a relationship, but I am not in love with her.

  188. TraderJ says:

    @ FatBastardSD

    “I would hate the blog to become a place where only a few people are allowed to post and the point of view is homogenous. You are right about the disjointed posts as not everyone can always agree who the troll is. I would have never passed this initial screening and look at how valuable I am to the blog”

    I agree I am not saying I would like to see wholesale moderation going on, but it would be nice if each poster could block the posts of other posts that they prefer not to see. The way it usually works is when on a forum trolls like our current resident one get less and less response to their ramblings they realize they are more or less just talking to the mirror they give up and move on to better hunting grounds…

  189. Beck says:

    TJ, How do you use proxy servers?

  190. Jersey Darling says:

    @FatBastard, that’s not true. You had me at hello 😉

  191. Jersey Darling says:

    @Beck, obvi she wouldn’t mind considering you’re currently banging the maid. And I’m sorry, at this point I’d need to be paid to put up with you. Let me know when that check is in the mail!

  192. FatBastardSD says:

    @Jersey Darling

    I would hate the blog to become a place where only a few people are allowed to post and the point of view is homogenous. You are right about the disjointed posts as not everyone can always agree who the troll is. I would have never passed this initial screening and look at how valuable I am to the blog :-).

  193. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “We could become buddies IRL 😉 I used the word attached and not married, because I do not seek married women (separated is fine as long as not actively living under the same roof … not worth the potential drama) Sure, like FB said it is actually easy to prey on married women who are unhappy with their marriages, but that sort of scenario just doesn’t jive with my happy psyche. Becoming involved in cuckold dynamic is not my thang!” – Principium

    Okay, yes ‘attached’ is totally different than married. Currently, there’s a guy aggressively pursuing me and he said he wasn’t going to stop until I told him I’m in love and getting married. Which, neither one is the case at the moment. I’m in strong LIKE, not love. :-)

    I would introduce you to my friend (who has a profile on SA), but I don’t feel she could keep things NSA for too long. I’m finding this out as I try to coach her through this lifestyle.

  194. Beck says:

    “Beck – the job is yours if you never post again. Or have any involvement in the site either. Agreed?”

    I cannot promise that. A moderator cannot be biased. I have to treat my own posts the same way as I treat everyone else’s.

  195. Beck says:

    “Beck, I think unless you decide to make good on our original bet I have no incentive to talk to you anymore. Sorry, I don’t have out food for free.”

    I think you are being inconsiderate. What am I going to tell my wife? “Honey, I met this girl with double Ds on a sugar baby dating site. She believes she can rock my world if I just go to NYC and meet her. Say, do you think I should take the shuttle, or the Acela?”

    Can you imagine how that would go down?

  196. WCSD says:

    @Beck – the job is yours if you never post again. Or have any involvement in the site either. Agreed?

  197. TraderJ says:

    @ WCSD – “TraderJ – There has been a very technically proficient SD (not me!) who has created an overlay onto the blog that allows users to block individuals they don’t want to see posts from (a troll remover!). This has been given to SA, and so far nothing has been done about it. I agree that SA probably doesn’t care, as this blog is really not a revenue avenue for them and they seem to be working on newer sites rather than investing in SA to improve the look and feel. Again, just my opinion….”

    I am sure your opinion is spot on. I would love to know how that layer works at this point one simply has to input a username, which I gather they could change every post and an email address which again doesn’t seem to me it’s verified, obviously somewhere underneath they are tracking IPs but lets be honest pretty much anybody can use a proxy these days. It is funny how they don’t get that a good forum with proper controls in place can be a very good revenue generator.

  198. Beck says:

    “Ahhhh….the excuse now when caught in a lie is ‘Oh, yeah, I purposefully put that in there to see who would find it…good job!’. Wow!”

    WCSD, Do you not want to know the story of my divorce? It’s a good story. It has romance, drama, AND tragedy.

    I am itching to tell it.

  199. Jersey Darling says:

    Beck, I think unless you decide to make good on our original bet I have no incentive to talk to you anymore. Sorry, I don’t have out food for free.

  200. WCSD says:

    Ahhhh….the excuse now when caught in a lie is ‘Oh, yeah, I purposefully put that in there to see who would find it…good job!’. Wow!

  201. Beck says:

    “I’m with you. I would love more active moderation. Problem is moderators don’t get paid,”

    I am happy to volunteer my services as the moderator. For free, of course.

    Hope this will help.

  202. Beck says:

    JD, Question for you too. Do you think I should make my profile a premium one?

  203. Jersey Darling says:

    @Beach_Girl I’m with you. I would love more active moderation. Problem is moderators don’t get paid, and what we really need is a forum.

    A forum would be beneficial for two reasons. You’d get much more traffic to the website from people who search and find the forums that way and then join, directly increasing SA’s revenue. Secondly, their blog could then be SEO optimized to bring in more traffic through google. Our comments totally kill any attempts at keyword loading.

    Plus, if someone lands in the blog through google from it picking up a keyword in one of our comments, if said viewer exits the web page quickly after that because the comments are a nightmare to navigate, SA gets dinged for that in googles search algorithms and their ranking goes down.

    @Blog Gods, are you listening?

  204. Beck says:

    “so he has been married for 23 years…is in his 40′s….yet has been divorced??? When did that happen?”

    I dropped that nugget in last night. Was wondering which one of my many active followers would find it.

  205. Beck says:

    PS: We pay her about $5k/month plus medical insurance. We also pay payroll taxes – it is completely legit.

  206. WCSD says:

    @TraderJ – There has been a very technically proficient SD (not me!) who has created an overlay onto the blog that allows users to block individuals they don’t want to see posts from (a troll remover!). This has been given to SA, and so far nothing has been done about it. I agree that SA probably doesn’t care, as this blog is really not a revenue avenue for them and they seem to be working on newer sites rather than investing in SA to improve the look and feel. Again, just my opinion….

  207. Jersey Darling says:

    @FatBastard, I think the best solution is for a mod to nip it in the bud. But ignoring posts could work too – though could you imagine how disjointed the conversation in here would get?

  208. Beach_Girl says:

    TraderJ~ I completely agree. I wish Guru would block the trolls. I am sure it is driving people away, just the rudeness was making me nutty… I hate drama and don’t wish to visit it here.
    Glad that some agree. but if people want to talk to me, they can get my email from Guru, or scroll up and get it here.
    Have a good one 😀

  209. Beck says:

    “You said you are a fan of FFM,”

    JD, My ideal FFM situation is husband, wife, and a housekeeper/maid who keeps the house running, e.g., cleans, cooks, does the laundry, drops off and picks up dry cleaning, drops the kid off to school and picks him up, takes the dog for walks, does errands and groceries, sorts out letters, helps with entertaining guests, what have you. We already have a wonderful maid, so at this moment we are not looking. We call her “Choti Bohu” which means second wife in Hindi. She is brilliant.

  210. FatBastardSD says:

    @WCSD

    Beck like trolls don’t need to be fed. They simply create multiple fictional personalities which have conversations with each other. In time they will get bored and find another blog.

    One solution is to have a feature where you can ignore people’s posts. I would hate for this to happen though as it limits my ability to insult other members of the blog.

  211. Principium says:

    @ Rosie,

    “Are we IRL friends?! Lol. One of my guy friends told me recently now that I’m attached, I’m nearly the perfect woman. He said if I get married, that would then make me absolutely perfect. He only sleeps with married women.

    I asked him why some men liked to pursue women who were unavailable (married or in a committed relationship). He told me it was a combination of knowing there didn’t have to be a commitment as well as a challenge and added ego boost knowing he was giving the woman something she was lacking in her relationship.

    I still don’t think it keeps you safe from having NSA…unless the affair is short and sweet.”

    We could become buddies IRL 😉 I used the word attached and not married, because I do not seek married women (separated is fine as long as not actively living under the same roof … not worth the potential drama) Sure, like FB said it is actually easy to prey on married women who are unhappy with their marriages, but that sort of scenario just doesn’t jive with my happy psyche. Becoming involved in cuckold dynamic is not my thang!

  212. TraderJ says:

    @ Beach_Girl

    “I really wish everyone would just stop encouraging the troll…
    It’s annoying, He use to be entertaining, but now he’s so rude and crass it’s shameful.”

    Sadly this is where the blog format of this discussion board, or rather the technical structure fails people that actually want to or are using it for something of value. When you get a troll here really nothing you can do but hope a MOD will put an end to it. But I imagine all the extra traffic pleases them. But in a forum setting generally speaking they have the ability to allow people to block/ignore posters they don’t wish to see comments from.

    I actually think in the long run the latter increases traffic more as you can be sure the nattering of our current troll is driving some people away that simply don’t find it amusing or they get bored of having to wade through its cesspool of comments to find the one’s worth commenting on.

  213. Jersey Darling says:

    Beck, I will feed you once, only because I am having lunch right now and it would be rude to eat alone.

    You said you are a fan of FFM, yet you won’t meet me because you have a wife and want to keep her?

    Fail to see why you can’t meet me. Silly rabbit!

  214. Beck says:

    Rosie, I am thinking of getting the premium membership because I cannot read the messages now and I am really curious to see what is out there, who would respond, what these women are like, what they re looking for et cetra. The monthly cost is less than cable and likely to be much more educational.

    I apologize if I have been unpleasant. I certainly do not mean to. I would appreciate if you can point out where I have been unpleasant and I will certainly correct the errors in my ways.

  215. FatBastardSD says:

    @Beck

    As much as I criticize the many SB’s on the SA site I don’t think they deserve the suffering you would inflict upon them with your profile and even worse, your messages.

    I will interact with you on this blog from time to time if it will keep you from joining SA with a premium account.

    And these were the words that FatBastardSd spoke when he made the ultimate sacrifice in the hopes of bringing SB’s and SD’s together in harmony. May he be remembered in the lore of the SA blog forever.

  216. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    Beck – I was wondering why you were still even here, but now I see you actually DO want to seek an arrangement? Your message has been so conflicting (at least to me). I thought you made a heartfelt confession (whether it’s the total truth or not…) of why you made up this character Beck in the first place – for writing purposes? But that’s not really it? You want to set up a profile and find a SB?

    Although your “confession” wasn’t 100% well-received by others, it didn’t mean you had to then become so unpleasant. If you really are here to try the lifestyle, this blog is a great place to ask questions, get support…but not if you come across as a troll/jerk. Just being honest with you.

  217. WCSD says:

    @All – Really? Still feeding the troll? There is no one to blame but yourselves for the annoyance that is Beck. Ignore him. He (she, whatever) is completely full of shit. As he (she, whatever) has pointed out already. Even his coming clean is full of crap. “NSA is quite possible if people are willing to use logic instead of emotions. But they don’t. I got divorced over that. Since then, I believe no woman who says she wants NSA” OK…so he has been married for 23 years…is in his 40’s….yet has been divorced??? When did that happen? When he was 9 years old in that hotel in London? He/she can’t keep up with the volumes of bullshit that are spewing out of him/her that it is completely pointless to even read any blog posts of his/hers (but, then I guess I have if I keep finding his inconsistencies in the crap he/she writes). Anyway, my last post on this mind numbing crap. Ignore, move on, stop feeding for the attention that it seeks….

  218. Beck says:

    Fatty, Do you think I should get a premium membership on SA?

  219. FatBastardSD says:

    @Rosie O’Gravy

    I do for the most part. A good troll should be very entertaining (which is what I strive for) like a jester. I was hoping that Beck would step up the game a bit.

  220. Beck says:

    Rosie, Spicey,

    I have a question for you. I am just about done with drafting my SA profile. Do you think I should get a premium membership and really go for it? Got the special pictures that Spicey wanted me to get as well.

    Would much appreciate your thoughts.

    -Beck

  221. Spicey says:

    Damn you, Fatty!

    Someone on the blog once accused me of being a man. So I posted a picture of my vagina watching Real Housewives of Bloggy County and nobody has ever challenged me since.

  222. Beck says:

    “why don’t you just ignore Beck’s posts?”

    Lack of self control.

  223. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    Ok, FatBastardSD. Thanks for clarifying. I’m certainly not here to add to dramaholics anonymous. On that note, why don’t you just ignore Beck’s posts?

  224. FatBastardSD says:

    @Beck

    Yes I do. And not only the 19-21 year olds. 18+ gets a high five from me every time.

    @Rosie O’Gravy

    Did not say you agreed, just commenting…

  225. Beck says:

    I thought so Fatty. I am sure you give high fives to men who boast about screwing the 19-21 year old classmates of his daughter.

  226. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “What are the statistics now, one out of two marriages end in divorce? Do not see how someone gets any challenge out seducing someone who is probably looking to leave the marriage anyway. If he wanted a real challenge he would show the woman that he is a better husband than the current one, where the woman would have no need to cheat.” – FatBastardSD

    You’re preaching to the choir, sir. Didn’t say I agreed with his approach at all. We had a debate about it and I basically said to him what you said. When I was in the sugar bowl, my SDs were single. Each person has their own reasoning as to why they choose to do what they do. I don’t judge. My glass house isn’t exactly small.

  227. FatBastardSD says:

    @Beck

    You may not.

  228. Beck says:

    Fatty, Two questions, if I may.

    What do you think of a father having sex with his daughter?

    What do you think of a father having sex with his daughter’s classmate?

  229. FatBastardSD says:

    @Spicey

    Hey Spicey, you are a woman!

  230. FatBastardSD says:

    @Beck

    “Is that an insult?”

    No. I have never insulted a woman by calling her a woman. I will try in the next post, let’s see what happens.

    I just don’t think a man would think it is an insult to accuse another guy of fucking 19-21coeds. I know many older women do get angry at this behavior.

  231. Kitty says:

    Hi. I’m a new sugar baby, and I have a lot of questions from someone who is experienced. Can someone reach out? I am more concerned about privacy more than anything.

    I am curious if I can post a photo without it being open to public/google search/etc. A members only thing. Or verified members only?

  232. FatBastardSD says:

    @Rosie O’Gravy

    What are the statistics now, one out of two marriages end in divorce? Do not see how someone gets any challenge out seducing someone who is probably looking to leave the marriage anyway. If he wanted a real challenge he would show the woman that he is a better husband than the current one, where the woman would have no need to cheat.

  233. Beach_Girl says:

    I really wish everyone would just stop encouraging the troll…
    It’s annoying, He use to be entertaining, but now he’s so rude and crass it’s shameful .

  234. Beck says:

    “Someone suspected you were a woman, this post removes all doubt.”

    Is that an insult?

  235. FatBastardSD says:

    @Beck

    “Would you prefer if I spent my free time fucking 19-21 year old coeds instead?”

    This post is educational as I have learned a new come back when I get insulted by a guy:

    “Oh yah, you fuck 19-21 year old college coeds you loser!”

    That should shut him up real quick.

    Someone suspected you were a woman, this post removes all doubt.

  236. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “So?! You are totally my type then. Attached already ;)” -Principium

    Are we IRL friends?! Lol. One of my guy friends told me recently now that I’m attached, I’m nearly the perfect woman. He said if I get married, that would then make me absolutely perfect. He only sleeps with married women.

    I asked him why some men liked to pursue women who were unavailable (married or in a committed relationship). He told me it was a combination of knowing there didn’t have to be a commitment as well as a challenge and added ego boost knowing he was giving the woman something she was lacking in her relationship.

    I still don’t think it keeps you safe from having NSA…unless the affair is short and sweet.

  237. Beck says:

    “Becky, do you really not have anything better to do with your time than troll on here? Sad…”

    I am looking for some fine 19-21 year olds to fuck in my spare time. Know any?

  238. London Girl says:

    @Spicey, no problem, apology appreciated and like Jersey I also wish you the best with your book!

    @Becky, do you really not have anything better to do with your time than troll on here? Sad…

    Right off again, play nicely children!

  239. Beck says:

    That is fine too. But I thought you were getting out of sugar dating.

    Another option is to marry someone with loads of cash and then hire a retinue of household help. That’s what I did.

  240. Spicey says:

    … Or sugar date and take the cash to hire someone to do that.

  241. Beck says:

    Why not find someone who has a kink about washing women’s dirty underwear?

  242. Spicey says:

    Beck –

    “I do agree with you that if a man finds an independent, intelligent, sex loving woman, he should immediately put a ring on her finger.”

    That is the problem. Men I date (and even my sugars apparently) think they’re in luuuurv and need to marry me. Nope! No thanks! Not happening! Not washing your underwear and raising your babies, and letting you turn me into your domestic servant. Fuck that!

  243. Beck says:

    One question for the men on this blog. Have you tried FFM in bed? I am curious as to what your experience has been. Personally, I find it a huge amount of work just to please one woman in bed. Two would be climbing Mt. Everest, no?

  244. Beck says:

    “Because, men seem to find independent, intelligent, sex loving women to be a commodity they want to keep on lock down. Y’all can’t be satisfied with NSA in the real world. Sugar is a way to keep things NSA for me too. And, it turns me on way more than, “I really like you, can I hump your thigh.””

    Point well taken. I misunderstood what you meant by misbehavior. I do agree with you that if a man finds an independent, intelligent, sex loving woman, he should immediately put a ring on her finger, or vermilion on her forehead, as is their mutual societal preference. These are rare commodities to find.

  245. Beck says:

    “you really have been married for 20+ years and have a 12 yo and this is how you choose to spend your free time?”

    Would you prefer if I spent my free time fucking 19-21 year old coeds instead?

  246. Spicey says:

    Beck –

    “Because monogamy makes men misbehave.”

    OK, why not at least date so that you do not have to stock up on batteries?”

    Because, men seem to find independent, intelligent, sex loving women to be a commodity they want to keep on lock down. Y’all can’t be satisfied with NSA in the real world. Sugar is a way to keep things NSA for me too. And, it turns me on way more than, “I really like you, can I hump your thigh.”

  247. Beck says:

    “So basically Beck II is just an annoying prick?”

    Basically.

  248. Beck says:

    Boston is in complete lockdown as the hunt for the Marathon bombers continue. Feels strange. Thankfully I made it to home by midnight last night.

  249. Beck says:

    “Because monogamy makes men misbehave.”

    OK, why not at least date so that you do not have to stock up on batteries?

  250. Beck says:

    “Just refreshed my page and Beck is now Amitabh Bachchan????”

    The one and only.

  251. Beck says:

    FFM works like a charm. We have employed a series of women over the years, ever since our son was born. Brazilians are the best. They cook, clean, do childcare, and essentially run the household without any hitch whatsoever. That enables plenty of free time on part of me and my wife to have fun. I am therefore a big supporter of FFM.

  252. Beck says:

    “Beck – Don’t go getting any ideas, getting me to tickle your testicles will cost you $25K.”

    With or without nails?

  253. Spicey says:

    SD – No, never lived in Europe. But, you remind me quite a bit of a European SD I met through SA. My one and only SA experience that was purely based on connection.

    Yep, even Spicey eschews the arrangement on occasion. But, just that once! Lol

    Beck – Don’t go getting any ideas, getting me to tickle your testicles will cost you $25K.

  254. Spicey says:

    Jersey – I got a kick out of some of those reviews. One woman who hated the book passionately, kept going back and reading it again and again and then posting on the competition discussion boards how outraged she was that “erotica” would make it so far in the competition. (So I posted a dirty poem about her using my work for her mommy porn fantasies. It still cracks me up.)

    Reading ones own reviews is like BDSM masturbation, it hurts, but it’s oh so very satisfying.

    I took the Mark Zuckerberg approach of “Done is better than perfect” and submitted an early draft for the initial launch and competition. Those reviews have been an invaluable lifeline in polishing the manuscript before national release.

    The content is still pissing a lot of people off. Oh we’ll, I’d rather be passionately hated than inspire nothing but ambivalence. There are worse things than having people review the book as “nothing but sex” – sex sells! Haha

  255. sassynsweet says:

    @P – Definitely long English cucumbers. So much tastier…

    @SDinLA – No, I only eat organic

  256. SD says:

    :) Morning? Well it is after lunch.
    I like mystery but it is more fun to take a look behind the mask. :)

  257. Jersey Darling says:

    Good morning SD. Sometimes I like a little mystery :)

  258. SD says:

    Hello JD? Why wearing a mask? Don’t be shy you haven’t to hide.

  259. Jersey Darling says:

    @Spicey, no worries. I take it as a compliment anytime someone confuses me for London Girl. And it definitely was not me – I never knew you had a personal blog until you mentioned it. I only ever did one search on you, which brought up a wealth of information after following a few links.

    But don’t worry, while I like to be informed I just happen to enjoy utilizing google. I never take it beyond that short of drawing my own conclusions. I have not read your book, just the reviews, but I wish you the best with it.

  260. Jersey Darling says:

    @Lo, the closest I’ve come to something like that was I had a couple who wanted me to hang out with them in AC for a fun filled night in the casinos and afterward. Very good looking young couple met through a different website.

    Not for me as I prefer my men alone and I’m not particularly into women, but if I were into that sort of thing they seemed super fun and I was actually quite flattered by the invite! I seem to attract swinger types every so often.

    @Fly, I loved your post, particularly the first point about if the man interrupts you. Everyone interrupts each other at some point but I had to think about one of my best lovers and nope – no interrupting! He’d always know when to chime in at the right times with a perfectly timed witty remark and he followed suit in the bedroom!

    @Trader J, How I love your posts 😀

  261. SD says:

    Well Spicey, i am not sure but if you tell me that you lived in the early 2000 in Europe then I become more sure that I know you.

  262. Lo says:

    hahahaha laughing right now

  263. Principium says:

    Too late in the night (actually early AM here) to write and opine on FFM dynamics. The main F has to be into the other F, or else it’s not going to be that good. It’s often best when the main F picks. Most guys are like switches, on & off, in and out… Women are like dials and the mood needs to be dialed up on a gradual scale. Otherwise, the M is just going to be acting out some cheesy porn fantasy. Also, most main F’s want to quickly dispose of the second F when the session is done and want them be gone.

    So, if she’s into you and both of you want to share a bed (unfortunately with him somewhere in there) and you want the spicey Latina (poor Spicey UT) to wake up in the middle of the night to devour you and vice versa without the M, then go for it. But if she wants to kick you out quickly after he gets off? Mehhhh!

  264. Spicey says:

    Lo – would you want to bang her if he weren’t there? That’s the trick to a good threeway, you have to pay most of your attention to her to keep her from getting jealous. The happier you make her, the more smoothly the whole thing will go.

  265. Lo says:

    Rosie how sad is that
    Yes princi he’s asian and looks like he could’ve been a bit of a nerd in his younger years, wealthy if his income is accurate, and his wifey is a spicey latina who highlights the fact that they have a very solid, loving relationship.

  266. Principium says:

    “MMmmmmm. I love baked kale! Eat it all the time. I would totally be the Lulu Lemon wearing kale to your spinach if I wasn’t already taken.”

    So?! You are totally my type then. Attached already 😉

  267. Principium says:

    “Because monogamy makes men misbehave.” Spicey!!

    Oooh, you are in UT and I could really make fun of what you quipped, but I won’t…

  268. TraderJ says:

    @ Beck

    “There’s so much blogmance going on … I am just waiting for Dorky to get hitched to TJ”

    So basically Beck II is just an annoying prick?

    I guess you have whatever twisted reasons you do for that moronic trolling you were doing that’s up to you the story you passed along was pretty pathetic.

    I have seen so many forums and blogs ruined over the years by wankers like you, so you’ll excuse me if I still think you’re full of shit.

    It’s pretty frightening to me if you really have been married for 20+ years and have a 12 yo and this is how you choose to spend your free time?

    So if you don’t mind please do me this one small favor and keep me out of your alternate reality. I guess I’m in the minority but I don’t find you amusing or witty or anything other kinda creepy and pretty sad.

    Thanks, much appreciated.

  269. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “Rosie, your FFM scenario is plausible when the male is an older SD…” -Principium

    Makes sense. He was older for sure. Not old like 75, but closer to 50 maybe and she was low 30-something I think. I don’t really remember, I just know I could totally feel her cat claws and it wasn’t because she was reaching for my hello kitty.

  270. Spicey says:

    For my first month on SA I had a bit of a cyber thing with a fetish couple (she liked the degradation of her man cheating, but of a cuckold thing) we still haven’t met, IRL but we chat on occasion. It made it hot that she was so turned on by him cheating, and I get to play the snotty spoiled girl that thinks she’s above it all. *I know, how can I possibly do that right? Must be really hard for me.*

    “Spicey, why not date, find a cool guy, and get married?” – Beck

    “Because I play hard to get and Nicey knows this.” – Capitol P

    “Because monogamy makes men misbehave.” Spicey!!

  271. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    MMmmmmm. I love baked kale! Eat it all the time. I would totally be the Lulu Lemon wearing kale to your spinach if I wasn’t already taken. :-)

    Just refreshed my page and Beck is now Amitabh Bachchan????

  272. Principium says:

    Rosie, your FFM scenario is plausible when the male is an older SD but there are a lot of younger dweebie kind of guys with some wealth who actually have wives/GFs and wish to partake and dabble with the FFM realm. My last none-organic SB told me that she had also received two such proposals from 2 separate young couples, who claimed to be in their low 30’s…

  273. Principium says:

    Rosie, I don’t shop often at WF because I find them to be a rip-off (I prefer Trader Joe’s). If one wishes to lurk around in supermarkets looking for women to pounce upon, WF is an excellent target rich place, filled with fit as a fiddle, tofu munching yogini types. Sh*t, I happen to like LuLu Lemon and I have spent a lot of money there on MYSELF because I actually like their men’s workout cloths.

    Generally speaking, yoga studios and yoga apparel retail outlets are target rich places to cultivate and foster SD/SB relationships because Yoginis and sales assistance personnel (LLL calls them educators) only get paid 10-25 per hour but I’m afraid that I’m not a creeper and I don’t hang around these sort of places like creepers do. If I wanted to prey on 20-25 per hour scantly clad females, I’d go take a BS yoga teacher training course for like 2K, like some guys do.

    As far as veggies go, yes I love them. I can’t get enough of spinach & kale. Will you be my kale?

  274. Beck says:

    NSA is quite possible if people are willing to use logic instead of emotions. But they don’t. I got divorced over that. Since then, I believe no woman who says she wants NSA.

  275. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    Agree, Beck. I think there are very few people who have the ability to truly keep things NSA. As I’ve said many times, I KNOW it’s possible, but it’s rare.

  276. Beck says:

    Rosie, This is precisely what happens when people can’t keep NSA as, well, NSA.

  277. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    I only had one experience close to what Lo described (a long time ago). A SB/SD couple contacted me through my SA profile and I met them for dinner mostly out of curiosity because I’m not really into the FFM thing, but thought I might be open to trying it out.

    Through dinner I learned the SD usually had multiple SBs, but fell for this ONE and they eventually agreed on exclusivity and even labeled each other as GF / BF rather than SB/SD. A few months into it, he confessed to her that he really needed variety in the bedroom so to appease his appetite she agreed he could have multiple SBs, but only if she could be a part of the selection process as well as the extra-curricular festivities. The vibe I got all night though was that she really wasn’t happy with going the threesome route, but she feared losing him. I felt really bad for her.

  278. Beck says:

    There’s so much blogmance going on … I am just waiting for Dorky to get hitched to TJ.

  279. Principium says:

    “Spicey, why not date, find a cool guy, and get married?”

    Because I play hard to get and Nicey knows this.

  280. Principium says:

    My advice to LO, regarding young couple (although I’ve never had any experience nor should I have had that sort of experience as that sorta stuff wasn’t as cool in the 80’s as it is these days) is to go for it once you’ve done your due diligence.

    Mind you, these people are the couples version of P4P, so you have to be ready for that but most often, you have a curious male who tries to convince his female to bring another female into the set and in the process, he ends up releasing the alpha female (because the guy is really most often a Beta)

    Heck LO, you may even end up with a younger SM or become a SM yourself 😉

  281. Beck says:

    “I think I’m over sugar for the foreseeable”

    Spicey, why not date, find a cool guy, and get married?

  282. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    *sit on the washing machine.

  283. Beck says:

    “Beck, that’s not nice.”

    Apologies then.

  284. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “Rosie, you make me sound like a tofu eating, Wholefood shopping tree-hugger. Luving it! Haha…” -Principium

    You mean you’re not? You DO live in Cali and most tofu eating, Wholefood shopping tree hugger guys I know are very fit. It’s okay to want your arrangement the same way you like your veggies. 😉

    —-

    “Bravo, Rosie. I think I’m over sugar for the foreseeable … I’d better invest in batteries!” -Spicey

    Tip: When the batteries die just on the washing machine during the spin cycle. 😉

    —-

    It’s nice to see Spicey and Jersey in a bit of a Kumbaya huddle.

  285. Beck says:

    “Beck – you don’t open the door for your wife? Really?”

    Sometimes I do. Sometimes she opens the door for me.

  286. Spicey says:

    Beck, that’s not nice.

  287. Principium says:

    Nicey: I am Spartacus, I mean Tequila. Who is Tequila?

  288. flyr says:

    @beck “The above is total nonsense. Open doors and wait for waiters to remove plates? Are you nuts? And, I don’t know if you have ever been married, but women interrupt their husbands all the time, and men interrupt their wives all the time too. If you have lived intimately with someone for 20+ years no one takes offense at such petty things.

    You are clinging onto a set of social norms from the Victorian age.”

    Just for clarification – yes I was married some years ago although not married now. Former wife is still friend and has been a “sensual reference”. When we were married she was my wife and SB ……….. much to the dismay of the neighbors. ……..

    .

  289. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    Beck – you don’t open the door for your wife? Really?

  290. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “@Rosie~ Loved that!! Can you do a recap of the blog every day? Guru, ya need to show her how to link to individual comments :P” -DorkyGuy

    LOL. Glad you got a kick out of my little recap. Unfortunately, not sure how much time I will have to be on the blog after this week when vacation ends. I’m sure I won’t be able to stay away entirely though (it’s always been addicting!). Trying to get my GF to partake, but she’s much more timid than I am.

  291. Beck says:

    “Guys, you could have all had an orgy under a full moon in Paris, and I still would have had a better night than y’all!”

    You are pregnant!! Yay! Congratulations.

  292. ContentSB says:

    @Dorky — How did your night outdo a Parisian orgy?!

  293. Beck says:

    By the way Spicey, has your SD died yet?

  294. Beck says:

    I am sorry to say that I am not Tequila. :-(

  295. Spicey says:

    Beck, are you Tequila? Please oh please say you’re Tequila! 😉 I’ll give Fatty a tongue bath (anyone willing to volunteer a tongue?)

  296. Beck says:

    “Sometimes my hand, sometimes my SB’s hand. Sometimes both. I am very large you see…”

    How big? Post a photo, along with your moobs.

  297. FatBastardSD says:

    @Beck

    Sometimes my hand, sometimes my SB’s hand. Sometimes both. I am very large you see…

  298. DorkyGuy says:

    Guys, you could have all had an orgy under a full moon in Paris, and I still would have had a better night than y’all!

    @flyr~ I think that is exceptionally well put, and tremendous advice for women in general.

    @Rosie~ Loved that!! Can you do a recap of the blog every day? Guru, ya need to show her how to link to individual comments 😛

  299. Beck says:

    “does your partner interrupt you when you are speaking

    does he wait for you to start eating and keep the waiter from removing his plate if you have not finished your meal

    does he open the door for you

    does he encourage you to talk at your pace about the things that are important to you and to develop your ideas ”

    Flyer, I have to tell you this as a married man of 23 years. The above is total nonsense. Open doors and wait for waiters to remove plates? Are you nuts? And, I don’t know if you have ever been married, but women interrupt their husbands all the time, and men interrupt their wives all the time too. If you have lived intimately with someone for 20+ years no one takes offense at such petty things.

    You are clinging onto a set of social norms from the Victorian age.

  300. Spicey says:

    London Girl, Jersey –

    My sincere apologies. I just found out who the mouth-breathing London poster was.

  301. Beck says:

    “That was pretty good. ”

    Is that what you tell your hand every night?

  302. Beck says:

    “Beck, I don’t really want to know. Why don’t you go find out for yourself if you really want to know! :P”

    What kind of a guru are you anyway? Aren’t you supposed to know these things?

  303. ContentSB says:

    @Guru — So I see you’re still evading questions about yourself?? :) I suppose you wouldn’t be the Guru if you weren’t so elusive :)

    Getting caught sucked on so many levels…I’ll leave it at that though…some stories are better shared off the blog :)

  304. FatBastardSD says:

    @Beck

    People would have liked your first persona if it was funny. The problem is that you are the Muzak version of the Ramones. A repetitive structure without any passion or creativity.

    That was pretty good. Can I trademark that saying?

  305. Beach_Girl says:

    Content~ It’s going to be 82F tomorrow and Saturday 43F…. what is going on, right? Glad things are going well with the new job, I am sure you will find another SD soon

  306. Beach_Girl says:

    flyr~ That is an interesting approach, I never about it and to be honest, now that I have, you are right!

  307. ContentSB says:

    @Guru — Well…that’s been quite the saga. Still seeing each other (it’s been over a year now. oy.) but things have changed (new position which requires much less travel…and getting caught in Dec.). But, he’s been my rock through a lot, and it’s hard to say goodbye to a best friend AND great sex lol. Drama, drama, drama! :) And what about you, sir?? Hopefully getting into some mischief?? :)

    @BG — I’m still in the Midwest…so not sunny/warm :( Very snowy and depressing. We’re all getting antsy for some nice weather!! I would happily take 40 and sunny!!

  308. flyr says:

    @dorky “Question for the ladies… have you noticed any difference between married and single men when it comes to knowing how to please a woman?

    It seems to me that the married men would have the upper hand on this one, if they ever really loved their wives.”

    I realize the question was directed at women but from the other side of the heavy breathing. If a man cares about pleasing the woman he’s with then some experience solving a variety of puzzles helps. You can learn to paint by the numbers but an artist has worked with the fearsome blank canvass.

    In flying we joke about being “at one with the sky” I think there are a lot of similarities about being at one with your sexual partner.

    I’m surprised that some of my female friends and even relatives are caught off guard by their partner’s lack of sensual sensitivity and focus. A couple of questions and most frequently they see a pattern.

    does your partner interrupt you when you are speaking

    does he wait for you to start eating and keep the waiter from removing his plate if you have not finished your meal

    does he open the door for you

    does he encourage you to talk at your pace about the things that are important to you and to develop your ideas

    If the answers are no then you should not be disappointed if the behavior continues in the bedroom.

    a woman should not have to ask for a space in which she is forbidden to please and required to focus only on the pleasure she receives. Guys get this all the time and turnaround is fair play……… very fair play.

    However, women continue to reward bad behavior with the idea that if they give more their partner will reciprocate. If it’s not in the partner’s dna it’s only going to happen under duress and that’s not good.

  309. Beck says:

    Guru, Have you been able to figure out which SDs here wear women’s underwear in private?

  310. Lo says:

    have any sugarbabes here had an arrangement with a couple and how did you like it? A youngish married couple contacted me, both relatively attractive and my curiosity is sort of killing me but I’d like to hear of someones experience with this sort of thing

  311. Beach_Girl says:

    Content~ Yeah, it becomes endless chatter for no reason and bull crap. but If and when you find someone it’s all worth it.
    I am easy going usually, not so much in the last year, that is why I wasn’t here 😀

    If I can ask, where did you move to? Sunny and Warm I hope?

  312. ContentSB says:

    @BG — Sorry to hear about the drama…but i love your positive attitude that it will soon change!! Sending positive thoughts your way…you’ve always seemed so easy going…you deserve a drama free life!

    Sugar dating seemed to be getting more difficult here even a year ago…I’ve chatted with a few people and from what I’ve heard the screening process is nearly endless now. I suppose if you eventually find what you’re looking for it’s worth it….if only there were guarantees that would be found!

  313. Beck says:

    “True Confessions of Beck”

    Enjoy my second persona for a few days at least before I give my real true confession.

  314. Spicey says:

    Bravo, Rosie

    “Who will Spicey give the final rose to rendezvous with?”

    I think I’m over sugar for the foreseeable … I’d better invest in batteries!

  315. Principium says:

    Rosie, you make me sound like a tofu eating, Wholefood shopping tree-hugger. Luving it! Haha…

  316. Beach_Girl says:

    Content~ A new City!!! awesome 😀 Sugar is harder now on the site, I find… maybe it’s just me. So happy for you girl.

    My life has been drama for the past year and I know it’s going to change soon. Fingers crossed 😀 lol

  317. Jersey Darling says:

    Love it Rosie!

  318. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    Recap of today’s blog in headlines:

    “Do These Pants Make My Ass Look Fat?”

    “SBs and SDs Go Geek With Tech Exchange”

    “Charming vs. Wealthy – Which Do SBs Prefer?”

    “Dorky and TraderJ Trade Talk”

    “How to Handle SB Bid-nezz, Taxes & Amway”

    “True Confessions of Beck”

    “Better Sex? Married vs. Single”

    Stay tuned for the SA Blog Chronicles to find out if Beck ever gets to delight in FatBastard’s moobies. Who will Spicey give the final rose to rendezvous with? Will Principium find the organically grown arrangement?

    And more!

  319. ContentSB says:

    Hey BG! :) I’ve been well! Haven’t had any sugar adventures for awhile (not sure I want to jump back into it all…some days it seems more appealing than others), adjusting to a new city, and still looking for some career advancement. Meeting lots of new interesting people though and thoroughly love exploring my new city! All in all life is pretty great right now :) How have you been?!

  320. Principium says:

    All this stuff about you ladies and your sexual escapades! I recall not so long ago, a lover told me that I was like a chick with a d*ck. I wasn’t really sure if it was meant as a compliment or a slight! But hey if that works for you, I’ll be your personal C with a D 😀

  321. Beach_Girl says:

    ContentSB~ how have you been?

  322. Spicey says:

    Capitol P – You slut! Lol

  323. Principium says:

    @ Dianna: “Ohh wow your profile picture with the mask!! I remember you:) I was wondering if everyone used “limbic system” on here because I’ve seen it posted so much. Now I know why:)

    Glad to see you on the blog now that I know who you are on the site.”

    Did we ever, you know ??? 😉

  324. ContentSB says:

    Thanks Dorky! What kind of craziness have you been getting into here??

  325. Spicey says:

    Hey Content, welcome back.

    SD – I am confused now, you remember my picture from SA or because we DO know each other? You also remind me of someone.

    Rosie – His skill may have been light, but he would spend hours! Hours! Absolutely worshiping my body from head to toe! Seriously not even in the same universe as the way most men “play”

  326. DorkyGuy says:

    Hey CSB! Welcome back to the fray :)

  327. ContentSB says:

    Wow! I only recognize about 2 people here; LOTS of new faces! Hi to my old sugary pals! And a warm hello to those I’ve never interacted with. I hope everyone is doing well! :)

  328. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    Positano is my favorite. Sooooo romantic! Firenza comes in 2nd.

  329. SD says:

    @Spicey: OMG 32. Now I am frightened. That fits. with the person I remmeber viweing your picture.

  330. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    Spicey – if you were transported back to high school now, you probably wouldn’t be saying the same thing. I’m guessing your memory of it is better than what it actually was because (and I’m assuming) his inexperience was equal to yours. Then again, maybe you were a real slut in high school. I kid, I kid.

  331. Beach_Girl says:

    Spicey~ Don’t you go thinking you are the older SB here girlie lol… 😀 It is me!!!!

  332. Lo says:

    Dorky – the best man in bed is the man who really, really enjoys women.

    This.

  333. Spicey says:

    Ha! That is why he was so uniquely talented. When it comes to certain things, a man can’t be too soft, but most men forget this in their enthusiasm.

    I am 32, ancient for this board!

  334. Jersey Darling says:

    @SD I am trying to make it my goal for next year. We will see what happens!

  335. SD says:

    @BG, ca va bien.

    Venice you be nice or a really stinking dump.

    But florence is like heaven.

  336. SD says:

    Spicey you sound as you would now be 80.
    And to be gentle is not a privilegue of the youth. And a trained hand can hold your explosion for hours.

  337. Spicey says:

    Never did make it to Boboli gardens, but dusk at the Piazza Michelangelo! And, of course, a day trip to Cinque Terre.

    Venice is a glittering flirting jewel, stunning. But Florence ….. ah!

  338. Beach_Girl says:

    Bonsoir SD
    Ca va bien, et toi?

  339. Spicey says:

    Some of the best sex I ever had was with my inexperienced high school boyfriend – there were certain things he liked to do, well and softly, for hours!!!!! Mmmmmm!!!!! Ohhhhh!!!! :))))

  340. SD says:

    Bonsoir BG,
    Comment vas-tu?I

  341. Beach_Girl says:

    Rosie~ I completely agree, an unselfish lover is the key

  342. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars!

    Hope everyone is having a great evening?

  343. SD says:

    @JD the Night of the mask counts, running through the streets. Who is behind the mask. Flirting. The game and the magic.

  344. SD says:

    Sometimes less is more. And you feel happy. i like the Giardino die Boboli. Lying in the garden, the city under me. A good wine, good food and dolce vita. Oh and gelato.

  345. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    Dorky – I personally don’t feel a man’s marital status has much to do with how good he is in bed. Even if a man has never been married, chances are, he’s had a long-term GF at some point, probably a live-in so they are one in the same – minus the piece of paper that legally binds them.

    A man is either attentive in bed or he’s not. Some men are selfish and don’t take the time to make sure the woman is also enjoying herself. I prefer an aggressive man in bed. One who takes charge, but is also going to know how to hit all the right spots to make sure I’m satisfied too.

  346. Jersey Darling says:

    @SD I love the whole thing. I find it very artistic and beautiful and would ideally want to go with a partner fully in costume as well.

  347. DianaSBinOC says:

    @Rosie O’Gravy says:

    “Yeah, I see what you’re saying and there’s much truth to everything you stated. I didn’t want to delve into breaking down the levels and nuances of emotional intelligence as I didn’t want to bore the blog with my psychobabble (which I find waaaaay more interesting than Forward Trade Contracts and VCs… ).

    I was referring specifically of two levels within emotional intelligence (EI). Emotional honesty (level 2 of EI). Emotional honesty concerns the willingness of the person to know and own their own feelings. Then there’s also emotional detachment (level 6 of EI), which is when emotional responsibility has been achieved (actually discovered). If one has attained those 2 levels, it is easier to manage NSA.”

    “Blah, blah, blah…” bh

    “I probably put the blog to sleep. Zzzzzzzzzvvv”

    No you didn’t!! I’m wide awake and appreciate the thorough explanation.

  348. SD says:

    @JD Only the mask counts not the costume.

  349. Jersey Darling says:

    I personally love breast men. But I enjoy having them spend a lot of time there…

  350. Spicey says:

    SD – I agree re: Florence, divine! A glass of wine on the balcony at Ufizzi – exquisite! A late night stroll over the Ponte Vecchio, holding hands, perfection.

  351. SD says:

    @Spicey. Maybe you remember me to much to somebody I know. And I think you are special. I would have respect for you and even if you are extremly hot it makesa different. I would respect you as a person.

  352. Jersey Darling says:

    @SD – While I am financially independent and stable, I’ve only managed to stay that way by carefully watching my budget. My income just isn’t high enough that I have a significant quantity that is expendable.

    Anything over $1,000 I just can’t throw away and to be honest when I go I want to do it right, I’d probably be putting that much into the costume alone.

  353. Spicey says:

    Dorky – the best man in bed is the man who really, really enjoys women.

    I don’t care for breast men, generally, they seem to fixate on one thing and don’t pay enough attention to the rest. But married or not is less relevant than just really caring to please one’s partner.

    I, personally, find that more the determining factor in a man being a good lover.

  354. SD says:

    @JD well a flight from the US to Europe is cheap and within Europe there are so much opportunities. Especially by car.

  355. Spicey says:

    SD – I am glad to hear you think I’m interesting. Your wine cellar = delightful. Curious (not disagreeing, just curious) why I am not your type?

  356. DorkyGuy says:

    Question for the ladies… have you noticed any difference between married and single men when it comes to knowing how to please a woman?

    It seems to me that the married men would have the upper hand on this one, if they ever really loved their wives.

  357. Jersey Darling says:

    @SD, Finances. The trip would cost thousands of dollars and I simply don’t have that right now.

  358. DianaSBinOC says:

    “Thank you Diana. I’ve been on the record saying that I can’t afford Nicey, but hey, who knows? There’s always RL when she’s done with this other Phantom who’s supposedly convalescing at Cedar’s…”

    Ohh wow your profile picture with the mask!! I remember you:) I was wondering if everyone used “limbic system” on here because I’ve seen it posted so much. Now I know why:)

    Glad to see you on the blog now that I know who you are on the site.

  359. Beck says:

    I have been to Venice. The city is sinking. go before it is too late.

    I was not impressed by Venice though.

  360. SD says:

    @JD Why are you not going?
    It is easy to find 1000 reason not to do a thing but only one to do it. But that one is more important than all other reason against it.
    Maybe Beck would be take you to Venice. BTW: Florence is 1000 times more beautifull than venice.

  361. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    Spicey – I know. Gross. I think men between the ages of 19-35 only know jack hammer humping. So jejune. No thanks.

  362. Beck says:

    JD and Spicey, now is the time for make up sex. Go for it.

  363. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    Spicey – I know. Gross. Jack hammer humping. So jejune. No thanks.

  364. SD says:

    My winecellar? :)
    I had a nice coversation tonight.
    What is the perfect dinner.
    Sitting outside, on a hill only above the sky and the stars a good bottle of wine and good dark chocolate and a beautiful woman and life is perfect.

    And an important rule for win. It is not important what the price of aq wine it, it is more important with whom you share it.
    I think Spicey you are an interesting person even if you are ot my type but that doesn’t mean that you are not interesting in another way.
    Maybe it is a more valueable compliment.

  365. Spicey says:

    Jersey – even the Spicey kitty can purr when I’m not being prodded. Lol.

  366. Jersey Darling says:

    About two years ago I dated a 19 year old because he was SO good looking and sweet I could not resist. He was like a rabbit though, I could not keep him off me.

    Ultimately not smart enough though :(

  367. Jersey Darling says:

    @Spicey Aww thank you, that was so sweet!

  368. Beck says:

    Damn it, why am I always late by 2 years!?

  369. Spicey says:

    Rosie – Oh God! I can’t imagine anything grosser than having sex with a 19 year old guy!

  370. Jersey Darling says:

    @SD, you have NO idea.. I have been sad for the past 4 years that I have not been able to go to Carnival in Venice. It is a dream for me. I have always wanted to go and go fully decked out…

  371. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “But I thought it is the in thing, no? I mean, not the ball tickling part, but the getting a 19-21 year old coed part.” – Beck

    Nah. That was 2 years ago. Cougars are in now.

  372. Spicey says:

    SD – Somewhere fabulous of course, with exceptional wine!

  373. Principium says:

    This: Real love means sometimes to let the other go…

    I paid a very hefty price for this experience, hence my babbling on about not being emotionally available as a bona fide BF material. It just sapped all my falling in love juices… But I got my making love juices all intact 😀

  374. SD says:

    @Spicey okay when and wwhere a dinner? :)

  375. Beck says:

    “Beck – then they miss out. Initiating is a turn off to me.”

    See, this is why I knew you will not be able to break me. :-)

  376. SD says:

    @JD: If you like mask then join the Carneval of venice. Esüecially in the middle of the night when all mask are falling down.

  377. Spicey says:

    Jersey – the shape of the mask, the shape of your eyes, the angle of the shot, the black and white – very noir, very alluring, but understated too.

    I have too much the cheerleader next door look, a mask makes me look like I’m going trick or treating.

    Beck – then they miss out. Initiating is a turn off to me.

  378. Principium says:

    @ Nicey: Capitol P – I think geography is a more relevant issue. P.S. – the photo I had seen before was the one of you at some event, sitting at a table.

    Correct and that was the one which was recognized by this other person.

  379. Beck says:

    “I just don’t make the FIRST move, the VERY first move.”

    What do you do when the other party never makes a move?

  380. Beck says:

    “I’m not sure a 19-21 yr old would be able to tickle your balls the way Spicey would.”

    But I thought it is the in thing, no? I mean, not the ball tickling part, but the getting a 19-21 year old coed part.

  381. SD says:

    True love is to demand nothing and giving everything. There os a veryy nice story what love ist. i have to look for it.
    Real love means sometimes to let the other go.

  382. Jersey Darling says:

    @Principium, Understandable, but boo. I have a huge thing for masks and masked events.

    @Stacey – Why is it flattering, because my face is covered? 😉

  383. Spicey says:

    I just don’t make the FIRST move, the VERY first move.

  384. Beck says:

    “Beck, have you ever played chess? There are many moves, the first and the moves that follow.”

    If you always play black, what do you do when the KP4 never happens?

  385. Spicey says:

    Funny SD – I’ve thought that maybe you were someone I know, from Vienna. I guess just similar in your style and interests.

  386. Principium says:

    @ Jersey, I had mentioned before that someone who knew my Ex, had recognized my photo (it was last year … no big deal to me as I don’t owe the Ex anything, plus she never told the Ex where exactly she saw me for the obvious reasons) but one of my kids once made an off-the-cuff remark that, “dad is chasing after gold-digging young girls” so It’s a small World, but otherwise, no other worries of recognition or retribution as I am BOSS. Nevertheless, no need to upset the applecart.

  387. Beck says:

    Well Spicey, the way to truly love someone is to change their poopey diapers, after they have switched to solid food.

  388. Spicey says:

    Beck, have you ever played chess? There are many moves, the first and the moves that follow.

  389. SD says:

    @Spicey. No but a girls heart with the words. “I love yu but I have to leave you we have no future together.”

  390. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “Rosie, I think I have attained both. Do you think I am ready to get a 19-21 year old college SB?” – Beck

    I’m not sure a 19-21 yr old would be able to tickle your balls the way Spicey would.

  391. Spicey says:

    To love someone is to find them unconscious on the bathroom floor and wrestle their 200 lb. body into boxer shorts before letting the paramedics in the room. Lol!

  392. Beck says:

    “Beck – I don’t make the FIRST move”

    Then how will you BREAK me?

  393. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    IE not EI. Dsylexia much?

  394. Beck says:

    “To fuck someone is not love.”

    To love someone is to smilingly put up with their absolutely crazy demands made during pregnancy.

  395. Spicey says:

    SD – you actually remind me if someone I know as well. Have you ever broken a girl’s ankle while seeking Keiserkreiner?

    Jersey – I always liked the masked photo, I thought it very flattering.

    Beck – I don’t make the FIRST move

    Capitol P – I think geography is a more relevant issue. P.S. – the photo I had seen before was the one of you at some event, sitting at a table.

  396. Beck says:

    Rosie, I think I have attained both. Do you think I am ready to get a 19-21 year old college SB?

  397. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “Ohh you have a valid point. I think that’s why the allowance part of NSA keeps things in perspective. Still I’ve never viewed “emotional maturity” to mean that a person can compartmentalize their emotions when it comes to intimacy. There are some that have been able to do that early into their adulthood and others that would never dream of it. Some could assume on the opposite end that emotional maturity is someone that can actually only be intimate in a loving committed relationship. Neither way is correct, they are just different people that handle their oxytocin levels accordingly.” – DianaSBinOC

    Yeah, I see what you’re saying and there’s much truth to everything you stated. I didn’t want to delve into breaking down the levels and nuances of emotional intelligence as I didn’t want to bore the blog with my psychobabble (which I find waaaaay more interesting than Forward Trade Contracts and VCs… 😉 ).

    I was referring specifically of two levels within emotional intelligence (EI). Emotional honesty (level 2 of EI). Emotional honesty concerns the willingness of the person to know and own their own feelings. Then there’s also emotional detachment (level 6 of EI), which is when emotional responsibility has been achieved (actually discovered). If one has attained those 2 levels, it is easier to manage NSA.

    Blah, blah, blah… :roll:

    I probably put the blog to sleep. Zzzzzzzzzvvv

  398. Jersey Darling says:

    Prince – Nooo I like this one better!

    I’m leaving my mask regardless.

  399. Beck says:

    Damn it JD!

  400. Jersey Darling says:

    Beck, while I know you’re itching to see some fur fly, I have no desire to get into it with Treasured again.

  401. Beck says:

    Diane, you laugh, but I wouldn’t put it beyond my wife to do exactly that. And then fondle my balls.

  402. Principium says:

    OK Jersey, now that you’ve seen it, I’m going back to torso…

  403. SD says:

    To fuck someone is not love.
    Love is to miss someone, every touch makes you happy. You share the sorrow and happyness. And if she is not close to you you feel something missing and togetehr with her you are happy and feel complete. Love is to underatnad without words.

  404. Beck says:

    Go ahead JD, make Treasured’s day.

    From your perspective, why do you think Treasured reacted that way? Was she jealous?

  405. DianaSBinOC says:

    “Beck : did you write that for your wife because she caught you on this site? -)”

    “How did you know that!? Imagine my surprise when I found her reaching out to me with an offer for an arrangement!”

    Hahaah!!

  406. Principium says:

    Jersey: I wrote that stuff myself (no Nobel Literature Laureate in here either!) It is not uncommon for people to copy & paste from others.

  407. Jersey Darling says:

    @Beck, that picture caused such a ruckus. I’ll probably only ever use it again if I really want to piss off Treasured.

  408. SD says:

    Oh Spicey with you I would like to go for a dinner. You remember me to somebody.

  409. Beck says:

    SD, Trust me, I am waiting for my wife to die so that I would be free to fuck everything with a tit, starting with Fatty. I keep telling her every day.

  410. SD says:

    Beck don’t judge herself to fast. Maybe you will fall in love with Jersey. :)

    And beck believe me it is fun to walk on this dangerous path.

  411. Jersey Darling says:

    For the longest time my picture on here was a masked picture of myself.

    But he had the same section in his profile as I thought you did? I must have remembered incorrectly!

  412. Beck says:

    “Becky – I actually don’t make the first move. So if any fondling happened it would only be a reciprocal fondling.”

    Then I am not scared of you any more. But if you don’t make the first move how would you break me?

  413. Principium says:

    Thank you Diana. I’ve been on the record saying that I can’t afford Nicey, but hey, who knows? There’s always RL when she’s done with this other Phantom who’s supposedly convalescing at Cedar’s…

  414. Spicey says:

    Becky – I actually don’t make the first move. So if any fondling happened it would only be a reciprocal fondling.

  415. Beck says:

    Jersey, Why not post a pic of the pink top?

  416. Principium says:

    Jersey, the blue pants guy was not me then. I currently have one main photo and I’ll put it up in here just for you!

  417. DianaSBinOC says:

    “Principium, Frankly, you have been the only man here who acts like an adult. So I am not surprised that I didn’t ruffle your feathers. Adults are usually comfortable in their own skin. The rest of the men, I must admit, are poor specimens of our particular gender. I have never seen so much male insecurity in any place but a SB watering hole.”

    I second this 100% Principium and Trader J have been a breath of fresh air posting here.

    Ohh and nice new picture Principium:) Yah for in shape sexy SD’s!! I’m hoping you and Spicey become the next IT SD/SB couple:)

  418. Jersey Darling says:

    SD – Thank you, I just don’t reveal myself all that often. And currently I’m hiding from a certain somebody so my avatar has gone away.

    May bring either that one or a new one back later tonight though.

  419. Beck says:

    “Becky’s afraid of a little girl. ;)”

    With a big sex drive. But seriously, let’s say you got o dinner with a friend, and she leans over and fondles your balls. How are you supposed to react? I think I would jump and get stuck on the ceiling.

    Even if Fatty is the one doing that.

  420. SD says:

    Jersey. Your other avatar was more nice. Why are you hiding?

  421. Spicey says:

    Capitol P – I do so like a good spanking 😉

    Becky’s afraid of a little girl. 😉

  422. Beck says:

    ” I’m thinking he wouldn’t last 20 minutes.”

    Only if I am motorboating Fatty’s moobs.

  423. Jersey Darling says:

    @Principium, quite sure it’s you because it has the part of your profile that you quoted on here before. And I see the ab pic with blue pants.

    Unless my memory is mistaken.

  424. DianaSBinOC says:

    @FatBastard

    @ DianaSBinOC

    “You probably missed the post where I explained she had a negotiable allowance on the profile but told me she had high offers when she met. So your factual details are wrong, which is no surprise, but lets continue with your “psychological” analysis.”

    Umm and how can “factual details” be wrong? They can’t be facts if they are incorrect.

    Your name speaks volumes as well as your tone. Psychological analysis isn’t necessary at all.

    I’m not here to argue with you. So lets NOT continue.

  425. Principium says:

    Nicey, you’d need far less time to break me! Jeez! An hour or two? I’m really easy work. How about a minute or two? Deal 😉

  426. Beck says:

    “Beck No, Sahib. All of my SBs were coeds- full time uni students from 19-21 when I met them, *looking* young was not a criteria, if anything, it was problematic.”

    Call me BeckBabu. that’s how we Bengalis call each other. Say, were they good lays or just fish in bed?

  427. SD says:

    Beck you are to human to this person. i thinking about more mediaval torture methods. But i will definitly not met her again. Embarrassing.
    But my french girl. … Dangerous but i like the danger. :)

    “Play the game, everybody play the game …”

  428. Principium says:

    Jersey, if you had clicked on an ab pic on the the featured profile rotation this time around (past 3 weeks or so), I assure you that it wasn’t mine! I set the self-indulgent photo to private this time around as opposed to a similarly taken shot at the last time.

  429. SDinLA says:

    @Spicey You cyber-stalker you! I know JUST the SD for you, unfortunately, he’s currently not looking. “Hour two?” I’m thinking he wouldn’t last 20 minutes.

    @Beck No, Sahib. All of my SBs were coeds- full time uni students from 19-21 when I met them, *looking* young was not a criteria, if anything, it was problematic.

  430. Beck says:

    People who do not appreciate good wine should be shot, and I say this in all seriousness.

  431. SD says:

    JD I didn’t lost it I spoke enough french today and get a few bottles of a nice 1998 and 1999 burgundy.

  432. Jersey Darling says:

    @SDinLA, believe it or not I don’t care for abs – they’re just his defining feature at the moment. I don’t have anything against them, but if I have to pick a physical feature of a man’s body it would be his back. Broad shoulders, smaller waist… I can’t keep typing about it or I’ll get too excited.

    @Principium I wish I had a good answer for you. It’s a combination of the fact that it looks like a professional photo which makes me think stock, and that you are so fit looking. If it was an amateur photo I wouldn’t have had the same reaction.

  433. SD says:

    Beck do you ever had the situation before that you had an SB with you with really good food and wine including the wine producer and the SB does not like the wine and … So embarrasing,

    Well and my other Sb which ist interested in more will meet me tomorrow and the whole weekend.

  434. Beck says:

    ‘I hate you.”

    That, usually, is the gateway to love. For Fatty.

  435. Beck says:

    “We both know I’d break you in hour two. ;)”

    I sincerely doubt it. Seriously. I say this with no malice whatsoever, but your sexual drive, personally, is scary to me.

  436. Jersey Darling says:

    @Beck ““Beck when is your date with Jersey and FBSD?”

    Working on scheduling it. JD promised to do Fatty with a strap on.”

    I hate you.

  437. Jersey Darling says:

    SD, you’ve lost your virtual French accent.

  438. Principium says:

    Jersey, why would have thought of my photo being fake? Just wondering?

    Nicey, it is always your fault because we (don’t) need (much of) a reason to spank you.

    SD: yes, Nicey is haute. I should have married her instead of her older sister 😉

  439. Beck says:

    SDinLA, May I ask you a question please? Is it true that you only date women who look like teenagers?

  440. Spicey says:

    I accidentally “friended” my old SDs wife on Facebook when cyber “researching” one day through an overzealous click. Fortunately she’s a Facebook whore with 700 friends and thought nothing of it.

    Beck – I must admit, if I were indeed in the market for a SB, Spicey would be my first choice. – We both know I’d break you in hour two. 😉

  441. SD says:

    No Jersey I came only back for you. You should know I can’t sleep without you and all my thoughts are only about you. :)

    In vinum veritas.

  442. SDinLA says:

    “Because you said it was on the rotation and so I went to the home page and the rotation came up and before I could even think, I saw abs and was like “gotta click it before it’s gone!” and only realized what I did after…

    That is exactly how my brain functioned…”

    Aha, so six-pack (or four-pack) abs have the same effect on women as cleavage/boobs have on men!

    I just read that Anheuser-Busch has a new tapered can for Budweiser that holds slightly less beer than the common 12 ozs, but it will be sold in 8-packs in lieu of 6-packs, so now we have to aspire to 8-packs!

  443. Beck says:

    “Beck when is your date with Jersey and FBSD?”

    Working on scheduling it. JD promised to do Fatty with a strap on.

  444. SD says:

    @Spicey. Well I nver though you are not hot but not my type.
    But today I had the most embarassing date ever.

  445. Jersey Darling says:

    SD comes back right after Beck’s big reveal? Really?

  446. DianaSBinOC says:

    “- A less emotionally mature SB seeking NSA (with less focus on allowance) would not (or should not) go for “cuteness + charm” factor because it leaves too much risk for NSA barriers to be broken. Add in a 6 pack, wit and intelligence? Hell, no!”

    Ohh you have a valid point. I think that’s why the allowance part of NSA keeps things in perspective. Still I’ve never viewed “emotional maturity” to mean that a person can compartmentalize their emotions when it comes to intimacy. There are some that have been able to do that early into their adulthood and others that would never dream of it. Some could assume on the opposite end that emotional maturity is someone that can actually only be intimate in a loving committed relationship. Neither way is correct, they are just different people that handle their oxytocin levels accordingly.

    For me I need to desire my SD more so for what he looks like than what he’s providing. If not then I would have to feel like it’s a chore or I would think more in a ” wow I have to go see him to buy these cute…..”. I wouldn’t feel right in having a relationship based solely on the allowance.

    Also intelligence. I’ve been lucky in meeting high intellectual type SDs. The very thing that separated them from others was that they didn’t just show their level of knowledge but they extended it to me. Allowing me to soak up bits and pieces of what they’ve acquired was so sexy. Just listening …and if he has a sexy voice too??? That’s where clothing becomes optional:)

  447. Beck says:

    “Prince and Spicey sitting in a tree… ;-)”

    I must admit, if I were indeed in the market for a SB, Spicey would be my first choice.

  448. Jersey Darling says:

    Because you said it was on the rotation and so I went to the home page and the rotation came up and before I could even think, I saw abs and was like “gotta click it before it’s gone!” and only realized what I did after…

    That is exactly how my brain functioned…

  449. Spicey says:

    SDlala – that’s only because I’m too old for you and Dorky keeps turning me down. 😉

  450. Spicey says:

    SD – the photo that is up right now is just a cropped stock photo. Capitol P can attest to my hotness. Lol.

  451. SDinLA says:

    “At the expense of repeating myself (for this brief stay on here), I have 3 numbers and most likely will meet with one POT SB who has piqued my interest.”

    Prince and Spicey sitting in a tree… 😉

  452. Spicey says:

    Wait JD, why is it my fault you clicked C.P.’s profile? Lol

  453. SD says:

    @Beck when is your date with Jersey and FBSD?

  454. Jersey Darling says:

    Ah yes, I forgot but now I remember.

    Interesting but if I did not know it was you, I would have assumed that your photo was fake and probably moved onto the next profile. Go figure 😛

  455. Principium says:

    That’s OK Jersey, I don’t have the time to go look at who looked me up, so if you did click, your secret is safe with me. Heck, half the time I don’t even remember what I had for lunch! Usually when my premium stint is over, I just delete the account (once someone who knew my Ex, recognized me)

    At the expense of repeating myself (for this brief stay on here), I have 3 numbers and most likely will meet with one POT SB who has piqued my interest.

  456. Beck says:

    “Beck – Why do you feel the need to explain your character and your ‘apparent’ real self (I’m sure many parts of it are true, but why would I believe all of it)? Essentially you are telling us all that you have no value to any of us (in being able to give advice, past experiences, etc.) which is not something that we didn’t already know. Are you fishing for sympathy? For someone to say ‘Good job on making up an unconvincing character and flooding the blog with your comments’? Why wouldn’t you have just disappeared? Why stick around (in commenting, by all means stick around and read the blog as really that gives us all entertainment or we wouldn’t be here)?”

    Au contraire, as someone who doesn’t have a horse in the race, I can give you the most unbiased advice. Try me.

  457. Beck says:

    “I think you already have created your next Beck, you’re just doing it under the same name.”

    There may be one and only on Beck.

    Now, if I were indeed Beck and not me, these are the women in the blog that I think I would like to add to my harem.

  458. Jersey Darling says:

    That was such an assist!

    And yes, I definitely did click it. Now I remember you posted part of your profile before.

  459. Jersey Darling says:

    Shit, I think I clicked it. Damnit Spicey!

  460. Jersey Darling says:

    @Principium I’ll just click through after your membership expires then 😉

    But to be completely honest, I didn’t pay attention to a lot of your posts since they were geared toward Spicey. Yes, I’m still catty. So I don’t think I could find you easily cause I didn’t pick up on enough clues you may have dropped.

  461. SD says:

    Spicey who make your photos?

  462. Spicey says:

    Capitol P – I think it just came up in the rotation on the home screen some time, June 2012 would make sense.

  463. Principium says:

    Deal Jersey. Look but no touch. Yes, I’m currently active.

  464. popi-sd says:

    Sd guru: thx for your input. This sb site is probably not for me.

  465. Principium says:

    Nicey, you may have indeed seen one of those photos before, but if you were located in UT, I assure you that I did not write to you then. I believe I had one of those as a main photo when I was on SA the last merrygoround, in the June of 2012. Prior to that was the Winter of 2011.

  466. DorkyGuy says:

    Guys, as long as Beck is coming clean, I feel I should as well. I am really a pimply, virgin, 15 year old boy, and use Wikipedia as my reference to make me sound smart. And I am gay… well, gay-ish. It’s complicated. Maybe that explains why I like girls with pronounced Adams apples.

  467. Jersey Darling says:

    Okay, thank you for your tidbit, you’re still active. Maybe I’ll try to find you and just won’t click 😛

  468. Jersey Darling says:

    This blog functions like any other blog on the interwebs. The email you use to post does not have to be tied to anything. Hence why it’s so easy for people to post under multiple aliases if they have the time and inclination to do so.

  469. Jersey Darling says:

    I think you already have created your next Beck, you’re just doing it under the same name.

    @Principium, no doubt I would, but considering you are likely a paying member (I don’t remember if you’ve mentioned if you are currently in one of your break periods), I don’t know that I’d be willing to reveal my profile by checking out yours. That is top secret info 😉

  470. Spicey says:

    In the interest of full disclosure I think I saw Capitol P’s profile once upon a time. One of the pics he sent me was familiar, maybe I’m wrong though. Most of you long timers on the blog saw mine long long ago.

  471. Principium says:

    Oh thank you Jersey for that tidbit :)

  472. Beck says:

    “Beck – Curious. Did you just create a profile recently during your SA adaptation of Game of Thrones?”

    Yes, on Friday evening. I was watching IPL Cricket, and surfing the web, when inspiration hit me like a bong full of of first rate Nepalese ganja.

  473. Principium says:

    You mean to say that you would need to have an email address with SA, in order to post on their blogs? Hence the reason to have a profile. OK, I see… In other words, if I decide to delete my profile after its expiration next week, I can only read these blogs but not partake as a contributor (using that term very loosely)

  474. Beck says:

    “Beck, you don’t need a profile to post on the blog. Anyone can, just FYI.”

    Really? Good to know when I need to create my next avatar here.

  475. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    Ok, thanks, Jersey. I don’t really need to find it, but I might search with my GF tonight (the one new to the sugar bowl) because I’m curious. By the way, she’s not having any luck. Most of the men have creeped her out. But I’m kinda glad she brought me back to the blog. It’s been interesting, to say the least. Nice change of pace while I’m on vacation.

    Beck – Curious. Did you just create a profile recently during your SA adaptation of Game of Thrones?

  476. Beck says:

    “I know that there are many different languages in the Indian sub-Continent, but I thought that after Hindi, English was the most prevalent (second) language, no?! So what is your other dominant lingo? Sanskrit? The only Indians who I knew of claiming English as their third langauge were the Parsi Zoroastrians (I grew up in England)”

    Bengali is my first language, Hindi is my second language, English is my third. I do read Sanskrit, though I will be hard pressed to speak in Sanskrit. I also can get by in French and once upon a time, I fancied learning German, but it didn’t stick.

  477. SD says:

    @Spicey nice new pic

  478. Spicey says:

    Oh Jersey – I am so turning that one into one of my regular lines in writing about the chic dynamic. Every now and then this blog gives birth to one of my zingers.

    SDlala – For some reason when I call Cedars they can’t find his name on their guest registry. Which seems strange for someone who had surgery on an artery near their brain stem to already be out of the hospital. Doesn’t it? Whether he was lying or not the comment about his investment = dead to me!

    Whoever it was that mentioned me getting a bill for my taxes, I remember now him actually asking if I would give him my SSN. So that he could pay me as a “consultant.” I am capable of blonde naïve moments on occasion, but that wasn’t one of them!

  479. Jersey Darling says:

    Beck, you don’t need a profile to post on the blog. Anyone can, just FYI.

  480. Principium says:

    I think you’ll like the profile photo 😉

  481. Beck says:

    “What is the use of a blue SD profile? Other than just to let it sit there idling by?! You can’t even send and receive, like what, 10 messages?”

    You cannot read any messages either. My dummy email address has been getting polluted for the past 4 days with 30-40 messages per day. Thankfully, I cannot read any of them.

    I needed one so that I could post on this blog.

  482. Sd says:

    Hi all,

    how do you do. Beck did you ahve your meeting with FB or Jersey?
    I am back from my dinner.

  483. Jersey Darling says:

    Principium, is that a dare? 😉

  484. Beck says:

    “Then, you’ll fit right in ;-)”

    See what I mean dorky?

  485. Principium says:

    What is the use of a blue SD profile? Other than just to let it sit there idling by?! You can’t even send and receive, like what, 10 messages?

  486. Beck says:

    “Haha! But Beck, it was only for conversation, I swear. Your wife could come too ;)”

    Are we talking threesome here?

  487. Beck says:

    “And yes, he is a blue profile… when I wrote that many comments ago I was taking a poke at him. I tend to do that at a lot of posters when I know more about them than I should and they act out, which is probably why Spicey has commented on my candy coated cattle prod (I still love this line!).”

    Pardon me, but what is a blue profile? Sounds suspiciously like blue balls, and while I have indeed been away from home for two days, I am in good shape as I have been jacking off.

  488. WCSD says:

    @Beck – Why do you feel the need to explain your character and your ‘apparent’ real self (I’m sure many parts of it are true, but why would I believe all of it)? Essentially you are telling us all that you have no value to any of us (in being able to give advice, past experiences, etc.) which is not something that we didn’t already know. Are you fishing for sympathy? For someone to say ‘Good job on making up an unconvincing character and flooding the blog with your comments’? Why wouldn’t you have just disappeared? Why stick around (in commenting, by all means stick around and read the blog as really that gives us all entertainment or we wouldn’t be here)?

  489. Jersey Darling says:

    Haha! But Beck, it was only for conversation, I swear. Your wife could come too 😉

  490. Principium says:

    Well detective Jersey, it is not too hard to find me either 😉

    The SD’s can not do keyword searches on other SDs unless of course they create a fake SB profile for research purposes.

  491. Beck says:

    “Damn! Does this mean no shopping trip to NYC? My bad is already packed! Oh wait that’s because I’m heading to the beach tomorrow!!”

    Do not be sad, Spicey. You will always be my one and only blogmance.

  492. Beck says:

    “if you are a guy you would not have resisted!”

    I am also a guy who would like to stay married!

    “I’d still stick to the terms of our initial bet and meet you on your next trip”

    See above.

  493. Spicey says:

    Damn! Does this mean no shopping trip to NYC? My bad is already packed! Oh wait that’s because I’m heading to the beach tomorrow!!

  494. Jersey Darling says:

    And yes, he is a blue profile… when I wrote that many comments ago I was taking a poke at him. I tend to do that at a lot of posters when I know more about them than I should and they act out, which is probably why Spicey has commented on my candy coated cattle prod (I still love this line!).

  495. DorkyGuy says:

    “Principium, Frankly, you have been the only man here who acts like an adult. So I am not surprised that I didn’t ruffle your feathers. Adults are usually comfortable in their own skin. The rest of the men, I must admit, are poor specimens of our particular gender. I have never seen so much male insecurity in any place but a SB watering hole.”

    Then, you’ll fit right in 😉

  496. Principium says:

    Okay Beck, you got it man.

  497. Jersey Darling says:

    It was pretty easy to find and I’m sure the info he gave will help you find it – I don’t want to post anything I shouldn’t. But he wrote about not being able to find good conversation and there were a few clear giveaways.

  498. Principium says:

    I know that there are many different languages in the Indian sub-Continent, but I thought that after Hindi, English was the most prevalent (second) language, no?! So what is your other dominant lingo? Sanskrit? The only Indians who I knew of claiming English as their third langauge were the Parsi Zoroastrians (I grew up in England)

  499. Beck says:

    Principium, Frankly, you have been the only man here who acts like an adult. So I am not surprised that I didn’t ruffle your feathers. Adults are usually comfortable in their own skin. The rest of the men, I must admit, are poor specimens of our particular gender. I have never seen so much male insecurity in any place but a SB watering hole.

    No, I am male, and I am, indeed, me. Not Beck. That is the other guy. Nice guy though.

  500. Jersey Darling says:

    And I’m only sorta joking. Obviously I felt you were not in NY since you would not meet me.

    But I’m a good sport. I’d still stick to the terms of our initial bet and meet you on your next trip 😛

  501. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    @Jersey – How did you find Beck’s profile? I thought (s)he didn’t have one. I haven’t used SA in a long time so I don’t remember the search features.

  502. Jersey Darling says:

    Beck, alas we can never be in love because you will never meet me. In fact, this is how I definitively know you are a girl – if you are a guy you would not have resisted! 😉

    I feel like we just got the reveal at the end of a giant game of Clue…

  503. Jersey Darling says:

    Btw I’m sad that no one has caught on that we have two major artists on this board, Beck and Prince…

    Trying to keep a musical theme going on here but no one else’s name lends itself to it. Perhaps I can be Bon Jovi or Bruce Springsteen?

  504. Beck says:

    Can we now fall in love, Jersey Darling?

    How did you like my profile? I was going to title that “Short, Fat, and Bald seeking Eternal Love and Dirty Sex”. Never got around to updating, except for the short, fat, and bald part.

  505. Jersey Darling says:

    @Prince – I’ve felt he is a she too! It’s the syntax and phrases (s)he uses.

  506. Beck says:

    “You had me fooled, Beck. I was actually lurking on the blog for a bit and it was your posts (including the Hugh Hef SD/SB comparison that someone else posted) that prompted me to hop on and share my knowledge – as I am cognizant of both areas (High Allowance SDs and how things work at the Mansion). Plus, I was trying to in my own way bring back some value to the blog when all the cat fights erupted.”

    I am honored.

  507. Jersey Darling says:

    Nevermind. I saw you answered the question.

    I knew you were from India because I found your profile 😉

  508. Jersey Darling says:

    Catching up on the blog and just got to Beck’s post…

    But Beck, are you in NY?!

  509. Principium says:

    @ Beck, why is that I have had this strongest suspicion that you (the blogger) channeling Beck, are actually a female. Note, I have been addressing you as Becky for a reason! Whoever it is that you picked up the bits and peaces of the information you have presented as the out-of-the-closet-Beck (so to speak) must be a real life character whom you actually know of from close by, but not so obvious as to giving away your inspirations real identity. Whatever you are, you never ruffled my feathers.

  510. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    You had me fooled, Beck. I was actually lurking on the blog for a bit and it was your posts (including the Hugh Hef SD/SB comparison that someone else posted) that prompted me to hop on and share my knowledge – as I am cognizant of both areas (High Allowance SDs and how things work at the Mansion). Plus, I was trying to in my own way bring back some value to the blog when all the cat fights erupted.

  511. Beck says:

    By the way Fatty, for the love of your moobs I will be anything for you. Even Beck.

  512. Beck says:

    “I actually think your Beck persona is better than this current one. Feel free to pretend you are Beck when interacting with me.”

    Do I fulfill a fantasy of yours, Fatty? Do you like to be insulted and made to feel financially inadequate by a trust fund baby?

  513. Beck says:

    That said, I would still like to have Fatty as my SB.

  514. FatBastardSD says:

    @Beck

    I actually think your Beck persona is better than this current one. Feel free to pretend you are Beck when interacting with me.

  515. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “We would need a sage girl, and so far, from what little I have seen, Rosie seems to fit the bill.” – Beck

    I’ll take that role, grasshopper.

  516. Beck says:

    “At any rate, if it makes Beck feel better coming clean to an anonymous group of people on a blog who gave him sh*t (which he took pretty well), so be it and let all be forgiven. Let bygones be bygones.”

    It’s not a matter of coming clean and feeling better. Do you have any idea how much research you have to do to create a fake persona, when the inquisition is relentless? I would need a whole research team supporting me if I were to continue on.

  517. Beck says:

    Ah, and how could i forget Russian!? She would be the innocent girl with the D cup, whose accent is so sweet that the moment you read it you want to cast her in the role of Aunt Julia, of the Aunt Julia and the Scriptwriter fame.

    • SD Guru says:

      @popi-sd
      “my security advisor sees potential exposure to extortion. Has any sd s had this problem or am I paranoid?

      You’re not paranoid as blackmail does happen in the sugar world. Just google “sugardaddy blackmail”. In the past I’ve wrote that blackmail happens more often than people are willing to admit. However, there are precautions a SD can take to minimize the risk, and depending on your personal situation your risk profile may be different from others. Keep in mind this is only one of many potential risks a SD faces, so you should be honest with yourself about your own risk tolerance level and decide whether it’s worth it for you. I’m sure your security advisor can give you more detailed advice, that’s what he’s being paid to do.

      By the way, why do you have a security advisor?

  518. Beck says:

    “Wow, you were a imagined persona! Boy you sure fooled me! Keeping it going for about 500 posts was worth it considering you had everyone fooled though, HAHA, LOL, ROFL! And the writing! You are not Rushdie, are you?!”

    I did get you riled up good, no? I had a good laugh, my friend, when you kept calling me all sorts of names like jackass and moron.

    It was good for me. How was it for you?

  519. Beck says:

    Now, if I were to write a novel with the characters on this board, this is how it would all shake out.

    We would need a bad girl, and that clearly would be Spicey with her penchant to motorboat anything that moves.

    We would need a sage girl, and so far, from what little I have seen, Rosie seems to fit the bill.

    We would need a provider-with-a-heart-of-gold (The Julia Roberts Way) and I do not know of anyone else but Treasured who is perfect in that role.

    Jersey, unfortunately, would likely have to be the routine mean girl, as will have to be the case for London. Not because they are mean, but because someone has to do it, after all.

    Sweetie and BG of course will be the always smiling and nice friends that we all had in kindergarten, who we would go to when the schoolyard bully would beat us up.

  520. SDinLA says:

    Oh Day-um! Someone left his browser open with the SA blog up and wifey got curious!

    @Principium, the “expensive shotgun gambit” reminds me of “Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels!”

    @TraderJ It’s interesting how you can pick up little clues from syntax/word choice and such, isn’t it? I’ve been pretty good at that myself.

    @Spicey Call Cedars and see if he’s really there. If you claim to be a family member, they will likely tell you.

  521. FatBastardSD says:

    @Beck

    Wow, you were a imagined persona! Boy you sure fooled me! Keeping it going for about 500 posts was worth it considering you had everyone fooled though, HAHA, LOL, ROFL! And the writing! You are not Rushdie, are you?!

  522. Beck says:

    “Beck : did you write that for your wife because she caught you on this site? -)”

    How did you know that!? Imagine my surprise when I found her reaching out to me with an offer for an arrangement!

  523. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    LOL @popi-sd! That was my first thought. At any rate, if it makes Beck feel better coming clean to an anonymous group of people on a blog who gave him sh*t (which he took pretty well), so be it and let all be forgiven. Let bygones be bygones.

  524. popi-sd says:

    Beck : did you write that for your wife because she caught you on this site? -)

  525. FatBastardSD says:

    @ DianaSBinOC

    You probably missed the post where I explained she had a negotiable allowance on the profile but told me she had high offers when she met. So your factual details are wrong, which is no surprise, but lets continue with your “psychological” analysis.

    I have platonic relationships in real life (not many but they exist) so why would I assume I would not want to have an arranged platonic arrangement? I was curios to see what this SB offered that my current platonic relationships did not. I assumed the whole premise of her “platonic” arrangement would require me to actually meet her in person to decide. Are you implying that just reading her profile and messages can constitute a $10K platonic relationship?

    The rest of your argument is based on the narcissistic hypothesis that all SB’s are desirable to all SD’s (which has the obvious implications for yourself). Since I did not have any interest in this SB your hypothesis is false, and there is no need to go any further through your analysis.

    I hope this reply was “filled with hope rather than expectations”.

  526. TraderJ says:

    @ Beck – “TJ, I am indeed from India. How did you figure?”

    I lived in SE Asia for almost 7 years and I dealt with a lot of folks from India and still do from time to time.. there were just a few phrases you used and grammar mistakes I am used to seeing from their written words.

    Now I really do have to go…

  527. TraderJ says:

    @ Dorky

    “That, my friend, is the question of the ages. But, we (as a nation) are getting exactly the results that we are voting for. We can’t expect any different outcome. It’s just that many are pretty short-sighted in how they vote”

    I have to bugger off for a bit, but I couldn’t let this one pass as I might not find again when I get back… but how does that saying go, countries always get the gov’t they “deserve” seems like in this case you guys have some bad mojo working for you.

  528. Beck says:

    TJ, I am indeed from India. How did you figure?

  529. Beck says:

    Oh, and I do not live in New York. I live in Boston. When I go to New York, and I do go there a lot, I stay at the Le Parker Meridien. There are two sets of elevators there. One across the checkin counter in the lobby, the other right behind it and you have to go around to get there. There is a fine barbershop in front of that second set of elevators. The bar is on the other side of the entrance, or, should I say, the other entrance leads to the bar.

    I definitely don’t know what are the good hotels in Boston, the city I live in. If TJ were to ask me for advice there, I would be at a loss completely.

  530. TraderJ says:

    @ “Beck”

    “Indeed, he is growing up to be the trust fund baby that TJ so despises.”

    Correction I only hate trust fund babies that think the world owes them something and they are too lazy to get up off their own ass and do ANYTHING.

    Are you by chance from India?

  531. Principium says:

    @ Dorky, I don’t care as I’m not in that bracket. The SD/SB paradigm seems to be a bit like the polygamist scenario, whereby those on top of the food chain get more and the rest are left to fend for themselves. Hey, I may be onto something for us average SD folks! Blast ’em away ladies!!!

  532. Beck says:

    Gosh, what a fucked up day! I hate to travel.

    There are way to many posts for me to read here, but I am working through it. In the mean time, I think it is time to tell the truth about myself.

    No, I am not who I am. I mean, I am who I am, but I am not Beck. Not even close. I made that character up, as many had already guessed.

    I ran across an article the other day that 7% of Harvard undergrads are SBs. That got me curious as to what a SB is, and how this whole business works. Asking questions is always the right way to go, so I decided to create Beck.

    Beck, incidentally, is not my finest creation. It is a little hard to do, as, while I do have a lot in common with Beck, I would never be looking for a SB. But Beck would. That’s where Beck comes in.

    I think it is only fair that I say a little bit about myself. I am actually happily married for 23 years (to the same woman). The sex is still pretty good, plus I always have someone to come to and get a hug from when I am in trouble. I am in trouble a lot.

    My income matches Beck’s, but my assets are far higher. That is not surprising, as I have about 10 years on Beck. However, I do not work in finance (how does anyone do that, anyway? It has to be mind numbing!). What I do will remain unsaid, but it is what people who go to business school and then do not go to Wall Street do the most.

    I do like to eat good food.

    I do not know much about escorts, nor do I know much about BDSM. Having slept with just one woman for 25 years, I never had the opportunity to indulge. I keep telling my wife that once she dies I will have an orgy. Unfortunately she has known me for too long, and doesn’t even pay any attention to it.

    A lot of my other characteristics comes from my 12 year old son. He is the one who plays squash and travels to tournaments all over the country. He is the one who is a master pianist. However, my love for art and literature is all mine, as is my politics. Incidentally, my son stayed at the Sofitel in Paris when he was 9 months old. That’s where my London Sofitel inspiration came from.

    Indeed, he is growing up to be the trust fund baby that TJ so despises.

    So what was the point of all this? Well, there was a time when I used to write. I am a foreigner, and English is my third language, so I never wrote much in English. But i was a published author in my native language by the time I was in my senior year in college. Of course, then I came to this country and the writing all stopped.

    Creating characters such as this is my way to indulge in my long lost writing days. I understand it is taking advantage of people, but I do hope that I was entertaining. If not, please feel free to kick my ass.

    I remain, forever yours, the one and only Beck.

  533. DorkyGuy says:

    “worse how the hell are you so far in debt it sounds like tax anything that moves…”

    That, my friend, is the question of the ages. But, we (as a nation) are getting exactly the results that we are voting for. We can’t expect any different outcome. It’s just that many are pretty short-sighted in how they vote.

  534. SDinLA says:

    @TraderJ It is absolutely double taxation.

    It hurts family owned businesses the most. Even with extensive estate planning, life insurance and such, often times the heirs are forced to sell the family business or end up levering it unfavourably in order to pay estate taxes.

    Solution? Find coed SBs like I did! Tution is free of gift tax in any amounts! 😉

  535. DorkyGuy says:

    Wait… gift a shotgun to your SB? You do realize that if police find your body blasted to smithereens, they can’t do ballistics tests on shotgun pellets, right?

  536. TraderJ says:

    @ DorkyGuy “TraderJ~ Yes… Estate tax *is* double taxation. That is, unless you’re talking to a liberal, to which they reply “the heirs didn’t do anything to earn the money”. Blah… one of the sore topics that harshes my mellow!”

    I just discovered something, I don’t like Liberals. How the hell can they know what the heir did or didn’t do to earn that money? Maybe they cared for the parents for years in home or helped build the family business without salary or being shareholders etc.. I mean that’s just silly. Sorry I know its not my place to judge but come on, you paid tax on the money once how can the possibly justify having to pay it again.. worse how the hell are you so far in debt it sounds like tax anything that moves…

  537. Principium says:

    *shotguns!

  538. Principium says:

    Oh, there may be a loophole in this whole “gift” conundrum and if I’m not mistaken, you can gift a GUN to your SB and GUNS are protected from almost anything and everything. If you file for BK in the US, you may lose your car and your house, but never your guns!

    There are shoguns in the 200K -800K range (don’t believe me? look it up!) So yeah, I’d advice that SD gift guns to their SBs. Let’s start a trend. Becky, you go first?

  539. TraderJ says:

    @ Principium – my mind boggles.. and here all this time I have to listen everyone telling me how Canada is a socialist country hahaha… sure sounds like having a SB in the US is a lot more expensive than Canada..

  540. DorkyGuy says:

    @TraderJ~ Yes… Estate tax *is* double taxation. That is, unless you’re talking to a liberal, to which they reply “the heirs didn’t do anything to earn the money”. Blah… one of the sore topics that harshes my mellow!

  541. popi-sd says:

    Spicy: it sounds like he doesn’t want to lose the investment he thought he was making.

    As for me, I see that the termination clause in the arrangement has to be stated clearly, nevertheless an sb who becomes dependent might be problematic if I terminate.

  542. Principium says:

    @ TJ, it is still considered a gift… Further, let’s say (hypothetically) the Nicey’s soon to be Ex-SD claims that he loaned to Nicey a sum of $$K and then decided that he wants to forgive (cancel) that “debt”. Then under our current tax laws, he can issue a form 1099-C (if he has Nicey’s SSN & personal info) and then Uncle Sam will send Nicey a bill, because that debt cancellation is also considered a gift!

    In the U.S. almost everything and anything can be considered a gift! Heck, sometimes people tell me that I’m an a**hole and I’ll just shrug and say, what can I do? It’s just my gift 😉

  543. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    My favorite cucumber is the Satsuki Madori. The skin is thin, not too spiny, and never bitter. Hard and crisp in your mouth and not too seedy.

  544. TraderJ says:

    @ SDinLA – I’m sorry wasn’t the US called the land of the free or something like that at one point? Good lord they put a lifetime limit on what you can do with the money YOU have earned and paid taxes on already? Wait a second, if you have an estate tax isn’t that double taxation? I think I need to go lay down.

  545. SDinLA says:

    @Principium Maybe Sassy prefers the battery operated cucumbers?

    @TraderJ Here in Murica, there’s a lifetime combined estate & gift exemption. That’s to stop people from giving all their $ away before they die and avoiding the 50% estate tax.

    The current lifetime exemption is around $5.2MM, per person. So a married couple can shelter about 10.4MM from estate/gift tax. (Pre-Bush tax cuts, the exemption was only $1MM!)

    The exceptions to that lifetime exemption are an “annual exclusion”, which was 10k but has been raised in 1k increments to this year’s 14k, per person. SO a married couple can give 28k to any other individual per calendar year without gift tax OR counting against your lifetime exemptions. Ditto for tuition, medical expense and a few other things in any amounts- doesn’t count against your lifetime exemption.

    So… anything beyond 14k per calendar year you give a SB can be treated in several ways:

    It can count against your 5.2MM lifetime exemption (if you have not used it up already.)

    You can pay the gift tax in advance to preserve your lifetime exemption (tax effectively works out to 50 of the amount gifted, or 35% of the total amount, including tax, equivalent to the estate tax rate.)

    Or you can make it “income” for your SB, in which case she is responsible for the taxes.

    The recipients of gifts do not pay tax on any gifts received, and do not even have to report it on their taxes.

  546. TraderJ says:

    @ DorkyGuy “TraderJ~ well, there isn’t a “limit to how much you can gift”. However, the receiver of the gift has to declare income taxes on any gifts over a certain amount in a year. If the SB doesn’t declare it as income, then the SD is liable for a “gift tax” which I believe is around 30% of the gift.”

    Wow talk about a whacked tax system. So if you say pay her CC bills or rent, etc… does that count as a gift under those rules or is that only counting physical cash?

  547. Principium says:

    @ Sassy: Yup, cucumbers are an excellent alkaline based food. Top shelf stuff. What’s your fave thu?

    A- Longer English cucumbers
    B- Thicker Mexican cucumbers
    C- Smaller Persian cucumbers

    Not being disrespectful any nationalities, as those are really cucumber types available at our local Trader Joe’s and Costco!

  548. DorkyGuy says:

    @TraderJ~ well, there isn’t a “limit to how much you can gift”. However, the receiver of the gift has to declare income taxes on any gifts over a certain amount in a year. If the SB doesn’t declare it as income, then the SD is liable for a “gift tax” which I believe is around 30% of the gift.

  549. Spicey says:

    Popi – I feel like it’s both of us were just being generous with each other. And, in this situation it was purely his generous gifts and covering bill$. I don’t see what benefit he hopes to gain by discussing his “investment.”

  550. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    Amway?! Pfffffft.Even Robert Kiyosaki failed at Amway.

  551. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars 😀

    Just on my diner break… wanted to say Hi!

    All these west coast SDs…. Why did I move back to Montreal?!?! :S

  552. popi-sd says:

    Spicy: I dont think there is anything to discuss with your failing sd because from my understanding so far this is sd.sb thing is not an investment but an arrangement that either party may terminate with reasonable notice. Correct me?

  553. TraderJ says:

    @ Dorky – “TraderJ~ I thought my ideas started off crazy…. I didn’t realize you guys would answer them seriously!”

    Haha, well there is merit to them, I have a handful of HK holding companies and even in the US there is nothing illegal about having them as long as you declare your ownership. Plus you aren’t sheltering money from taxes you are putting in post tax dollars..

    But all joking aside is there really a limit to how much you can gift someone in the US? I mean wow… that’s mind boggling.

  554. Spicey says:

    SDlala – I don’t know how my GayD thinks he’s fooling anyone, he’s more feminine than me. I’m sure I couldn’t pull off THAT one. But, I’d like to see what my SD does if I told him I was flying to LA this afternoon to see him at Cedars. Lol.

  555. DorkyGuy says:

    @TraderJ~ I thought my ideas started off crazy…. I didn’t realize you guys would answer them seriously!

  556. TraderJ says:

    @ DorkyGuy

    “How about this… build a shell corporation, and give her non-voting shares, and declare a dividend every now and then. When the arrangement is over, the business somehow goes bankrupt. (full of flaws, I am sure)”

    Now I’m just sayin, not suggesting anybody do this or that I know anybody that has done this but…. in HK there is no tax due on revenue if the income is earned outside of HK. So you simply set up a HK corp, get a bank account associated with it and give your SB one of the debit cards. They usually come with a pretty good 5k a day limit and although you would be dinged a bit on the exchange rates it is untraceable and untaxable. I use HSBC as their premier accounts can all be linked together online under “globalview” so you don’t even have to wire the money you can do an instant online transfer 24 hours a day. Just a thought..

    “Or… maybe SBs should just start accepting BitCoin?”

    Who doesn’t love bitcoins? How does she sign up to be merchant??

    “Or… sign her up into an Amway distributorship, and sign yourself up as her downline, then buy enough product that she gets commissions. That way you are mentoring her in her own business as well!”

    Is it just me or did your ideas get more crazy as we came down the list???

  557. SDinLA says:

    @Spicey Take your gay-SD to the hospital with you to visit the other SD, and introduce him as your new BF! 😉

    And oh yes, the “interior designer” one is an old one too. Couple of buddies of mine ended up marrying their interior designers. “Realtor” only works if you actually plan on buying property and she has a license. I think Ex-wife #3 of one of my attorneys was the realtor who showed him a house. Another friend of mine married (And divorced. And remarried. And divorced again.) a woman who was an assistant to his private banker, so she saw his finances before she got her claws into him. Think she was a gold digger? I’m not sure.

  558. Spicey says:

    Rosie – maybe an extra few weeks of binging at Olive Garden will do the trick? I’m thinking complete radio silence might be in order after that email.

  559. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    @Spicey – sounds like an arrangement you’re better off getting out of very quickly. Maybe you should come up with a way to have him ‘break up’ with you so you aren’t doing the breaking? Normally not how I would suggest handling things, but in your case it might be an easier way to handle this guy. 😕

  560. Spicey says:

    SDlala – I hear SBs make excellent “interior decorators” as well. They let you decorate their interior?

    Was Francois a subtle reference to the St. Lucia Chapter? 😉

  561. SDinLA says:

    @Spicey But what would I tell Francois, my current personal stylist?

    I am looking for a new personal trainer though. And I haven’t been very happy with my personal feng shui expert recently. Or my personal yogi. Or personal pilates instructor. Or personal esthetician. Or the girl who comes and rearranges my collection of sports memorabilia every day to satisfy my OCD tendencies.

  562. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “Also, did no one pick up on my low-cal favorite food (hint: lots of protein). Is the reference too dirty, or not dirty enough, to tantalize?” – sassynsweet

    LOL! I picked up on it and knew exactly what you were referring to, but thought one of the boys should chime in!

  563. Spicey says:

    Rosie – I’m a little weirded out by that message. At best it’s tacky, at worst it feels a bit like a threat, but I may be over sensitive after the lying incident.

  564. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “How does one interpret this message from a getting-exed SD – ‘I understand that we may have incompatible needs, however I have invested in thousands of dollars into this relationship and I would like to discuss that.’” – Spicey

    And what about the time and attention you’ve invested in him?

  565. Spicey says:

    Gentlemen! Hire her to be your personal stylist and have her send a monthly invoice.

  566. SDinLA says:

    @DorkyGuy TraderJ’s tool appears to be sharper than mine (albeit not as large as your tool), so I should probably let him answer this.

    “How about this… build a shell corporation, and give her non-voting shares, and declare a dividend every now and then. When the arrangement is over, the business somehow goes bankrupt. (full of flaws, I am sure)” Where is the income coming from? Are you just going to pay the company for some perceived service? Might draw scrutiny if it was too obvious, and you’d have to have the lawyers and CPAs examine the structure for legal/tax implications.

    “Or… maybe SBs should just start accepting BitCoin?” Brilliant idea! Except the Winklevii already beat us to it and cornered the BitCoin market. (I suspect that it may end up as well for them as the Hunt brother’s attenmpt to corner the silver market.)

    “Or… sign her up into an Amway distributorship, and sign yourself up as her downline, then buy enough product that she gets commissions. That way you are mentoring her in her own business as well!” Yeah, but with any MLM type scheme, there are so many inefficiencies and leeches sucking $ out of every dollar in revenue that you’d be better off just paying the gift tax!

  567. sassynsweet says:

    Fast food is an oxymoron. Food (fresh fruits, vegetables, and other recognizable delights) is best eaten slowly on a balcony in Paris with a lover waiting for the next bout of exercise…

    Also, did no one pick up on my low-cal favorite food (hint: lots of protein). Is the reference too dirty, or not dirty enough, to tantalize?

  568. TraderJ says:

    @ SDinLA – Taxes are always a welcome topic.. and I would like to point out that Canada has NO gift taxes.

  569. DorkyGuy says:

    Hey SDinLA, you’re a pretty sharp guy. Couldn’t we devise more creative ways to get money to SBs?

    How about this… build a shell corporation, and give her non-voting shares, and declare a dividend every now and then. When the arrangement is over, the business somehow goes bankrupt. (full of flaws, I am sure)

    Or… maybe SBs should just start accepting BitCoin?

    Or… sign her up into an Amway distributorship, and sign yourself up as her downline, then buy enough product that she gets commissions. That way you are mentoring her in her own business as well!

  570. SDinLA says:

    @popi-sd You should listen to your security advisor. Back in the late 90s, my National Security Advisor, Sandy, warned me about this with this inter… SB I had at the time. Although, technically, Moni… my SB did not try to blackmail me, it still led to all kinds of problems with my career and home life. Although eventually it did all blow over, and the stain it left on my career is not as bad as initially thought.

    @DorkyGuy I have heard MANY stories of blackmail from married SDs. And the “I’m pregnant and you’re the father” one is common too, married or single. Although I’ve seen gold digger GFs pull the latter one too.

  571. Spicey says:

    Shhh SDlala – it’s more interesting when people think I might look like Jabba the Hut in real life. 😉

  572. SDinLA says:

    Ooooh, Bid-niz talk! Does that mean I can talk about taxes?!

    Good news: The annual exclusion for gift tax went up from 13k to 14k this year, so Murican SDs can now be more generous to their SBs before having to worry about gift tax implications!

    (And as I have posted before, certain items such as tuition and medical expenses remain gift tax free in ANY amounts as long as they are paid directly to the school/provider.)

    @Spicey, Oh, those were YOUR pics, I thought they were of Grace Kelly and January Jones! 😛

  573. DorkyGuy says:

    @popi-sd~ I am sure our lovely blog SBs are all on the level, but the site is a dangerous place. Blackmail is way more common than is widely known. Your security advisor is correct.

    I think SD Guru may have written a blog topic on blackmail, but I can’t seem to find it. Hopefully he will chime in.

  574. Spicey says:

    Is there any universe where it doesn’t make him a complete ass clown to request that? I told him I could not/would not be his GF.

  575. TraderJ says:

    @ Spicey

    “I understand that we may have incompatible needs, however I have invested in thousands of dollars into this relationship and I would like to discuss that.”

    Sounds like he wants a refund :-)

  576. Spicey says:

    Capitol P – I was commenting on how you look better now then how you say you look at 30. You did get more firm and fit with age.

  577. Spicey says:

    How does one interpret this message from a getting-exed SD

    “I understand that we may have incompatible needs, however I have invested in thousands of dollars into this relationship and I would like to discuss that.”

  578. popi-sd says:

    Helping a lady seems like a good idea but my security advisor sees potential exposure to extortion. Has any sd s had this problem or am I paranoid?

  579. Principium says:

    A Nicey: “Unless you’re Capitol P – nobody’s body gets MORE firm and fit with age.”

    I wish this was true my Darling, but alas! The fact is that I was rock hard chiseled in my early 20’s, let go on myself in my 30’s (most married men do) and got back into the game again in my 40’s.

    There are men older than me and in far better shape than me. If I had the time, energy and the endurance to exercise for 2-3 hours a day, I’d love to do that. It sucks balls when you workout hard as you get older, but such a gratifying feeling after you are done :)

    Hey wait a sec, I think you may have taken a coy shot at me!

  580. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    @DokyGuy – It’s not annoying (at least not to me). It’s interesting even if all I retained from reading said shop talk was “eggs, birds-eye-view and seeds.” 😉

    I dated a trader very briefly. It was actually a turn-on to go to his office and see all the monitors with colorful graphs and moving numbers on the wall.

  581. TraderJ says:

    @ Dorky – hedge.fund.manager.2008 @ gmail

    It’s a throw away..

  582. Spicey says:

    Not one line of sexual innuendo in Trader’s post! I think he’s the troll!

    Trying to troll us all to broaden our minds and diversify. Damn you TJ, thanks to your bad influence I’ve just joined a microlending portfolio in Honduras.

  583. DorkyGuy says:

    @TraderJ~ I love the shop talk, but I bet it annoys the others just here to play. Would be glad to participate in an email exchange if Guru is keen to facilitate.

  584. Principium says:

    Regarding the POT SD “cuteness” or as Nicey puts it (out?) the S factor:

    The problem with that scenario was that I was not at the lower end of the range and the other POT SD was at the top end, it was that we were in two different ranges. She actually made me the first offer. All in all, it was just a bit strange. Ah well, chalk it up to past experiences. I’m sure we’ve had ’em in some form or another.

    Rosie has nailed it here:

    “- A less emotionally mature SB seeking NSA (with less focus on allowance) would not (or should not) go for “cuteness + charm” factor because it leaves too much risk for NSA barriers to be broken. Add in a 6 pack, wit and intelligence? Hell, no!

    – A woman who possesses strong self-awareness, discipline and has wrapped her heart and mind around what NSA really means (and is not allowance focused/driven) would probably choose “cuteness + charm” factor.”

    Total Kudos.

    @ Nicey again:

    Regarding the tight young bodies (20 somethings, both male & female but more so the female) I can give you an analogy:

    Drop a frog in boiling water and it’ll jump straight out (don’t try this at home, unless you plan to eat that roadkill) Put a frog in normal temp water and increasingly turn up the temp and it’ll probably stay in there till it’s all hot and ready to serve 😉

    Same principle applies to the young & tight bods: show these youngster a future photo of them after 10 years of partying, fast food binging, alcohol + drug abuse (throw in a pregnancy in between) and then watch the aghast expression and the horror on their faces. Take an instant photo of them once every year and not much moves in terms of the horror meter…

  585. TraderJ says:

    @ DorkyGuy

    Well getting the eggs spread around is a great reason to look into outside investing. Obviously I am a big fan of being in a group when one is starting out, but really research as you’d be surprised (or maybe not) how some people talk a great game about how they want to have a super high RR in their investments, but then want to invest in Big Blue all day.. kinda nutty.

    “Why not just buy a growth mutual fund?” ummm because that’s not investing that’s a savings plan and one you can’t count on either.. I know stating the obvious.. but yuck.. mutual funds… bad…

    I think this trader would agree with the VC guy you spoke to. Keep in mind I am not the traditional trader that people think of. Yes sadly I have a wall of monitors in my office, but we mix VC work with Trading. We trade Oil and Coal by the MT not the contract. Plus we got into VC totally by chance, we were involved in a Oil play that was going sideways and we had to put some POF to get the deal back on track and took a slice off the back, not much like a buck a MT and thought to ourselves hmmmm there must be other deals and markets that we do that in. It then became our niche.

    If you want to do some research you could look into Forward Trade Contracts that is more closely related to what we do. Won’t touch a deal worth less than 150MM and we require 3% up front to talk and on the back end depends on the play and overall ROI.

    On some really early pre-seed investments we take on JV partners but they tend to be beyond high risk but the RR on them is through the roof, but naturally they are not for the faint of heart. We are working on a solar project right now in Thailand have all the contracts signed with the gov’t etc.. and if it pops the money will be great and we have an Indian contact watching with interest to see if it works. As it’s not the traditional solar panel, and we are testing out a new heat recovery method..

    Oh shit.. that was way too much work talk.. sorry about that, so ummm yeah.. wow I love Uni SB don’t you?

  586. Spicey says:

    Pardon me mam, does that muffin top come in blueberry? Or is cottage cheese your only flavor?

  587. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    @Spicey – Or as one of my male friends says, a waterfall butt. Meaning a backside that looks like it might spill out all over the floor once the dam holding it up is removed. (dam = pants)

  588. Spicey says:

    Unless you’re Capitol P – nobody’s body gets MORE firm and fit with age. Better to start thin and give yourself room for error; or else, before you know it, your backside will look like two raccoons wrestling around in a pillow case.

  589. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    @Spicey – Yes. Great point. As with all things in life, there’s always an exception to the rule. That was a perfect example of when it would be appropriate to break the ‘don’t bring up other SD offers’ rule.

    @sassynsweet – I don’t touch Italian food either. Well, unless I’m in Italy. Then there’s no choice. Too good to pass up! But def calls for extra time in the gym!

  590. Spicey says:

    Sassynweet I’m with you. So much easier to keep the weight off when we’re young. Some girls may have nice bodies at 22, but you can see that as soon as they have a baby or hit thirty it’s going to be a fast downhill train with no breaks.

  591. DorkyGuy says:

    @TraderJ~ My primary incentive is diversification. All of my eggs are in the business I own, and that’s not smart. Secondary is opportunity for high growth. I have high risk tolerance. So given those two factors, why not just buy a growth mutual fund? My final reason is that I recognize there are gaps in my knowledge of business beyond a certain stage, and I think I could learn a lot by observing up close. Regarding the suggestion to join a pool… that’s exactly what I intend to do (there are several investing clubs nearby).

    I certainly don’t expect you to provide a tutorial… I can research well enough. Just wondered from a birds-eye view if there were other avenues besides the above that you thought might be worth consideration. It was a VC guy that suggested the path above, and I am curious what a trader has to say?

  592. sassynsweet says:

    @Rosie Thanks, but I’d die if my size 2 didn’t zip up. My favorite food is pretty low cal, after all – or boys, is it?

  593. Spicey says:

    There is one situation in which it might make sense for a sugar to discuss another offer that she has received. Occasionally you’ll meet that SD that you’re interested in and you seem to be compatible with, but you keep spending a lot of time on emails and phone calls.

    A smart sugar should know that just because the email communications are going well doesn’t mean this will result in an actual arrangement, and she should keep searching.

    If she is really more interested in man A, but he hasn’t yet closed the deal for whatever reason, she should let him know that he’s about to lose his interest If he doesn’t make an offer soon.

    In this situation she has nothing to lose. Either she decides to go with the other offer and nothing happens with Man A. Or, she tells Man A and he loses interest. Or, he realizes he’d better speed things along and she gets what she wants. She should be prepared that man A may call her bluff though, and only show these cards if she really is considering Man B.

  594. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “Is there a thing such as “cuteness + charm” factor which makes you want to be more with guy A vs guy B, who is more in line with your allowance expectations, considering the nature of the site?” – Principium

    My opinion: It really depends on the woman, her goal, combined with her emotional maturity. There’s many facets to consider on the woman’s side once she decides to pursue an arrangement lifestyle.

    – A less emotionally mature SB seeking NSA (with less focus on allowance) would not (or should not) go for “cuteness + charm” factor because it leaves too much risk for NSA barriers to be broken. Add in a 6 pack, wit and intelligence? Hell, no! 😉

    – A woman who possesses strong self-awareness, discipline and has wrapped her heart and mind around what NSA really means (and is not allowance focused/driven) would probably choose “cuteness + charm” factor.

    Agree that “other offers” from pot SDs should never come up. Common sense really. A smart woman understands this is a slap in the face to men.

  595. TraderJ says:

    @ DorkyGuy

    “TraderJ~ Trading has always interested me… but even more so, I am interested in VC. Both have a very high barrier to entry and require a lot of devotion. I think the place to get my feet wet might be angel investing. Any thoughts?”

    First of all you would have to be clear on how you are using the term “Angel” as angel investors and vc are increasingly lumped into the same basket. Usually people think of Angel investors as being a sole entity and VC as being a fund of investors pooing their money together. Also most people think of VC as being involved primarily in the High Tech world which is not true anymore.

    So for the sake of argument you could be an Angel on your own or join a VC pool to leverage your involvement. The benefit to be an Angel of course is that you alone get to choose what projects to take on, the downside of course is that you sink or swim on your own too.

    You should probably determine what is about the concept of being an Angel that appeals to you it can’t be just about the money as there are a lot better and faster ways to make a lot more money. So if it’s about helping a struggling company or helping to bring a product to market you believe in its likely a good choice. But do keep in mind most Angels are in so early you are lucky to be able to exit in under 5 years as a general rule and don’t forget how badly your investment will be diluted by investors coming after you.

    If you really want to get involved in Angel investing I would suggest you need to get started in an industry you know extremely well or one you have a passion to learn about. All my firms work now involves commodity plays of some kind and there was a time when I knew every deal’s particulars not any longer, I stick to Coal and Oil for the most part.

    You might also want to consider getting involved in crowd funding to sort of get your feet wet.

    Not sure if that was helpful at all, but the first step really is to determine WHY you think you are interested then it would be easier to determine a course of action.

  596. Jersey Darling says:

    No shooting here! I’ve long ago realized that going for power/prestige isn’t always the pathway to happiness. Still, I can’t help but be attracted to it.

    I’ve mentioned before that I date regularly as well (unrelated to arrangements) and if I found that elusive connection, that is ultimately most important to me and I am open to where it would take me – I don’t care what form it comes in. Finding someone who’d stick by me through thick and thin is more important than having someone who is powerful. But I’ve also been single for ~7 years while waiting for that to come my way, so in the meantime, this is a way for me to have a little fun sans expectations.

  597. Spicey says:

    Capitol P – I’d call it the “S” factor, who do I want to have sex with most? Once within a certain acceptable allowance range, I select an SD who I think will be interesting in bed.

    In my current situation it’s because I thought his particular kink was interesting to explore, he gave off a vibe that he would be a very attentive lover, and his demands re:time/sex/exclusivity weren’t outrageous. My first SD had my pelvis in full salute every second I was in his presence.

    Now that things are ending with my current, if I decide to sugar again, great sex, no drama, and schedule compatability will be key determining factors (though I still won’t dip into an allowance that doesn’t have a solid cost/benefit ratio).

    This time I think I also want someone who’s a LOT of fun, even when we’re not horizontal.

  598. Jersey Darling says:

    On B2B software development, I am so curious for more specifics from both of you but appreciate that you probably wouldn’t want to post that information here.

    I’ve also always been interested in trading but know absolutely nothing about it except for investing basics. It’s one of those things that listening to someone talk about it is like foreplay haha, it’s super sexy hearing someone talk about something I know nothing about!

    VC is something I’d obviously love to learn more about… from the receiving end 😛

  599. Principium says:

    @ DorkyGuy, business handshake :)

    @ Jersey, when one puts her thoughts on the subject matter as you did, it leaves almost no doubt as to your sincerity about your expectations. Just as a lot of guys seem to bid up to be with a younger hottie (even if shallow in terms of substance & experience) It is evident that some women do lower their expectations for an over all better nurturer of their mind, body & soul.

    Again we go back to the subject of male vs female hypergamy:

    Male —> Youth & looks
    Female —> Prestige & social status

    Please do not shoot the messenger 😉

  600. Jersey Darling says:

    @Dorky, are you trying to tease me by drawing attention to that post? Sneaky clever 😉

  601. Jersey Darling says:

    “Is there a thing such as “cuteness + charm” factor which makes you want to be more with guy A vs guy B, who is more in line with your allowance expectations, considering the nature of the site?”

    Of course. I will always go for option A over option B because if I feel a stronger connection with option A that is more important to me.

    That is why I’ve stated that a $1K allowance is more than enough for me. While several women on here have chided me for that response, what I usually don’t bother to correct them on is I’ve gotten offers for substantially higher that I’ve turned down because I do not feel a strong enough attraction to the person.

    I am not on this site because I want to make a lot of money, I am on here because I am hoping to find someone I connect with and I love successful and powerful men. I also love entrepreneurs and the site has a high concentration of them on here and I love picking up all the knowledge I can learn.

    That is another thing. I’d far rather benefit from someone’s business acumen than from their wallet. One will help me independently make my own money, the other will make me dependent.

  602. DorkyGuy says:

    @SBs (except Jersey, who if figure might dig this)~ this post is boring.. just skip past it

    @Principium~ B2B software development is indeed a very nice place to be! I am in the same industry.

    @TraderJ~ Trading has always interested me… but even more so, I am interested in VC. Both have a very high barrier to entry and require a lot of devotion. I think the place to get my feet wet might be angel investing. Any thoughts?

  603. Principium says:

    @ Jersey D: Thank you Princess 😉

  604. Principium says:

    I usually ignore those types of email messages as I suspect that most sane minded men and women do on this site. Just wanted to amuse the ladies on here that we men get our share (of course a lot less than you do)

    @ Sweetie: sweetie, you may be more of a natural than you give yourself credit for 😉

    @ Diana: I swear that I’m not that guy! Haha… Joking aside, guys like that have a knack to rot the whole apple cart for the decent fellas who have good intentions.

    Another Q for the ladies:

    Is there a thing such as “cuteness + charm” factor which makes you want to be more with guy A vs guy B, who is more in line with your allowance expectations, considering the nature of the site?

    I’m not asking a coy question or looking for compliments (really) but the reason is that during my last stint, I met up with a POT and she told me flat out on the 2nd occasion that although she had a much better allowance offer from a much older gent, she would seriously consider me, because of attraction and ALSO because I was looking for a couple of liaisons a month (as I have already posted on here) … BTW, my suspecting side was nudging me that she was actually going for both offers on the table 😉

    I don’t think that SBs should bring up the subject of their other offers or past SDs too early and too often. Same thing of couse for the guys who are perhaps the bigger of the two culprits for blatantly just comparing and being such tattletales.

  605. TraderJ says:

    @ DianaSBinOC

    “Actually the narcissist is the one that sets up a meet with a pot SB knowing fully that not only does he not want “platonic” but he would never be able to afford a 10K allowance.”

    I am not speaking for FBSD here, but only for me. I have also been curious to meet some of those 10K to look at me girls, I honestly did get an email from a girl that was asking 10k to 20k and her actually subject line was something like
    “candy for your eyes, not your bed” I did not msg her first.

    I did reply and I asked her if she read my profile as I was quite clear what my expectations where, she said she did but assumed after meeting her and seeing all she could bring to my life without sex she thought she’d “give me a chance”

    How can someone NOT want to meet a person like face to face and just see what the hell she is all about? I would NOT try to bargain her down and although I could afford her “asking” price I am 100% sure she would hold no interest for me beyond the obvious social study aspect of meeting.. if only I had more time to waste haha

  606. DianaSBinOC says:

    @ BastardFat

    “If you want to observe a bpd or narcissistic individual first hand, set up a meeting with one of the $10K platonic SB’s. The thinking is that you are a loser and are unable to find any woman to acknowledge your existence so you are easy prey. I met one girl who believed she was a SB for altruistic reasons. These women are SB Beck’s of the internet.”

    Actually the narcissist is the one that sets up a meet with a pot SB knowing fully that not only does he not want “platonic” but he would never be able to afford a 10K allowance.

    It’s a shame tactic to say ” hey you met me but I would never give you that” or It’s to try and break her down from what she seeks and push for something she doesn’t. ” I bet I can get her to…”

    There will always be things in life that you can’t have for whatever reason. Adults get that concept, others well….

  607. Jersey Darling says:

    @Principum “I’m beginning to think a more organic friendship with benefits is perhaps in the cards thru the blogs, if the main site fails to deliver.”

    Since you seem to have many nicknames already, I’m tempted to throw another into the fray and start calling you Prince.

    The approach you mentioned above is how I treat it. I’ve found much more interesting people through the blog than I have through the SA website. So much of what you go through on there is a waste of time (phone calls getting to know someone who ultimately never meets you, time sifting through emails, time spent on the profile and searching). If I’m going to meet someone, I’d rather enjoy the process and enjoy our conversation with no expectations. I’ve formed some great relationships with people from the blog, and if I never met any of them I still would not regret having gotten to know them.

  608. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “A question to all: How to handle an email (unsolicited) from a POT SB with the headline: “Do you ever C U M this way?” I’m smelling a slight hint of P4P. What you think?!” – Principium

    IGNORE. BLOCK.

    Or you could respond with: “No, and you’re not giving me much reason to C U M that way at all.”

  609. DianaSBinOC says:

    A – BLOCK

  610. DianaSBinOC says:

    “I am happy to invite a young woman out and pay for coffee/drinks/lunch or dinner as well as entrance tickets to the theatre, concert hall, fashion show or other event or place of interest. You would need to regard this in itself as a treat and mutually beneficial and it would also be a way of finding out if we would like to form a greater level of two way commitment.”

    lol

    I had a similar experience. A pot contacted me and decided to go through the different types of SD’s. His voice was nice until he explained the allowance types. Such a strange thing to hear someone’s voice get so loud and angry all based on explaining very simply… what he is not. He then got around to what he called 5 Star SDs which he gleefully stated was a man that took his SBs to 5 Star Restaurants. lol

    I did some research and found that many SB’s has complained about him. When I brought this to his attention he stated that the SB was mad that he wasn’t attracted to her. Lol This is of course after he pushed to meet her for a 5 Star Meal complete with unwanted groping under the table.

    After attempting to explain what most sugar babies are seeking failed and I received more “loudness” from him , I kindly stated that “it’s me, not you” in so many words.

    This gentlemen was 46 (really 58) so I decided to just get off the phone as kindly as possible. The man was about to blow a fuse so I pulled the eject lever fast.

    One thing that I notice out of all the men that have contacted me , the men that offer $200 a week or $700 a month allowance complain about how much drama came with their past SBs. Mainly they recall issues with the ex’s of sbs’ that hadn’t really left the picture. I wanted to inform them that perhaps it’s their allowance that causes an SB to always have other men in the picture. $700-$800 a month to be exclusively intimate (mind, body, life) with a 75 year old rubenesque man doesn’t really bring happiness to my mind.

    It doesn’t seem to matter how I explain why that’s not really mutually beneficial or why they aren’t receiving exclusivity. Generally it falls on deaf ears and I probably should have said no thank you early on and wished them luck on their next contact. I end up doing that last part anyways but several hours to days later. Mainly I’m pleased that I didn’t have to hear any of it in person:)

  611. TraderJ says:

    @ Principium

    Q -A question to all: How to handle an email (unsolicited) from a POT SB with the headline: “Do you ever C U M this way?” I’m smelling a slight hint of P4P. What you think?!

    A – BLOCK

  612. sweetie says:

    P, I’m a terrible business woman, I’ll take the above words as a compliment, though. Good for my ego :)

    Now if I were a guy, would I like that kind of approach from a lady I’ve never met? Prolly not.

  613. Principium says:

    @ Sweetie, look at you! The Miss-student-already-negotiating-terms-Sweetie 😉

    A question to all: How to handle an email (unsolicited) from a POT SB with the headline: “Do you ever C U M this way?” I’m smelling a slight hint of P4P. What you think?!

  614. sweetie says:

    P “I’m beginning to think a more organic friendship with benefits is perhaps in the cards thru the blogs, if the main site fails to deliver. What Y’all think?!”
    It makes sense, depending on the benefits. I think that’s what BG was referring to when she said the blog used to be different and characters would have get togethers once in a while.

  615. Principium says:

    @ Jersey: I’m an actor, an astronaut, a part time a**hole, and at times I charm ladies 😉 But when I have spare time, I manage a B2B software development Co.

    @ Sweetie, sure why not? Strangers things have happened. I’m beginning to think a more organic friendship with benefits is perhaps in the cards thru the blogs, if the main site fails to deliver. What Y’all think?!

  616. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “Ew, I don’t eat cheap food.” -sassyandsweet

    Well, then. Revised just for you…

    No, dear, it was the Scalini Fedeli.

    —–

    “Rosie, that answer would not come out of the mouth of a sane hetro man if he happens to be keen on keeping his Bic lighter intact.” – Principium

    Nice cross-referencing of posts. Touché!

  617. sweetie says:

    Student, Jersey. Studying Portuguese.

  618. sweetie says:

    Jersey, that’s plenty info, thank you for sharing it. And, yes I understand :)
    P, I will email you, my dear. Maybe you change my ways 😉

  619. Jersey Darling says:

    @Principium, what do you do if you don’t mind sharing?

  620. Jersey Darling says:

    Sweetie, my background in tech is varied. I’ve done plenty of the hands on stuff – scripting, development, database administration, security etc but my real passion is in leading teams and motivating people.

    What I’m currently doing now is a bit different, but I can’t reveal everything about myself on a public blog!

  621. Principium says:

    Sweetie, you can email me directly with your techie issues. That’s also what I do hence why I’m almost always online, apart from when I chat with cute girls and cause trouble 😉

  622. sweetie says:

    Jersey, you mentioned you were more of a techie girl. Do you do computer programming? What exactly do you do? Just curious, I seem to resists technology quite a bit, for whatever reason. I guess my brain doesn’t like all these gadgets… wondering if I should reconsider my old school kind of living.

  623. sweetie says:

    Hello, P!
    It’s quiet today. Is everyone exhausted from too much typing the last few days? Yesterday at this time I had quite some serious catching up to do.

  624. Principium says:

    Jersey, although sometimes a cigar is just a cigar, I’d still err on the side of complimenting you on your ass.

    Hi Sweeite :)

  625. Principium says:

    Nicely, I’m gonna steal that line but will replace community service with national treasure.

  626. sweetie says:

    Morning dears! How is everyone?

  627. Principium says:

    Treasured, I’m a staunch believer in believing!

    Nicely, I like your ass, er I mean, your ego!

    I need Becky’s opinion on Olive Garden.

    Rosie, that answer would not come out of the mouth of a sane hetro man if he happens to be keen on keeping his Bic lighter intact.

  628. Jersey Darling says:

    You know, I’ve never understood why that should be a trick question. If I’m asking, it’s cause I want to know if I should put on a different pair instead – we all know different pants can make it look different!

  629. Spicey says:

    I once dated a man who had the perfect response to that question: “Your ass is a community service, but those pants don’t do it justice.”

    100% success rate

  630. Spicey says:

    Does this Gravatar make my ego look fat?

  631. sassynsweet says:

    @Rosie “NO, dear. I believe it was the Olive Garden.”

    Ew, I don’t eat cheap food.

  632. Treasured says:

    “Treasured, please be direct with me! Was that a pick up line directed at me?”

    Hmm… My previous remark actually was at prince Harry’s adventures in Vegas 😛
    But, feel free to view it as a pick up line directed at you. 😛 If you wish.

    I guess, people believe things at what they want to believe. What about you, P? 😉

  633. Frank says:

    Olive Garden? Around here it’s the Golden Corral. Otherwise known as the golden trough

  634. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “Do These Pants Make My Ass Look Fat?”

    NO, dear. I believe it was the Olive Garden.

  635. Principium says:

    Treasured, please be direct with me! Was that a pick up line directed at me?

    As far as the POT SD’s intro email goes, there is a concept called DTPMMALF which stands for:

    Do These Pants Make My Ass Look Fat. This is a question which every man has or will inevitably hear at some point in his life and frankly speaking, there is no good answer to that. It’s like, damned if you do and damned if you don’t. Sp what’s a man to do, when faced with such a loaded question? Well simply put, the best answer would be, “yes I love your ass”!

    Apply the same principle of selective hearing to this dork’s intro (no offense to DorkyGuy) The operative word in his entirely painful diatribe is “PAY”. Therefore your answer should be, “yes I’d love to be paid, so how much”

    Namaste!

  636. Treasured says:

    P’s, to be caught on a party with your pants down fondling a lady’s boobs – man must be fun! 😀

    Since I am not allowed to post profiles anymore (waaaaaaa!!!), am posting just a a description, of what a mentioned “SD” is offering:

    “I am happy to invite a young woman out and pay for coffee/drinks/lunch or dinner as well as entrance tickets to the theatre, concert hall, fashion show or other event or place of interest. You would need to regard this in itself as a treat and mutually beneficial and it would also be a way of finding out if we would like to form a greater level of two way commitment.”

    YAY! I think I have found a SD of my dreams!!! Food an a show in a company of a Matt Lucas’s twin brother! I am booking my tickets to X and am begging for a guy to take me in!

    Gosh, what guys like THAT are doing on SA?!

  637. Principium says:

    Hey Treasure,

    It’s become like an epidemic here also. My torso stares at itself every 4-5 posts too!

    Why Prince Harry? My all time favorite Prince is still Prince Akeem of Zamunda! I just loved the funny Eddie of the 80’s 😀

  638. Treasured says:

    Guys – you are nuts 😀

    A note: mornings have become just a BIT more tolerable with the P’s torso appearing on the blog every 5 posts or so…. To be completely honest, after 4 hours of sleep, I do not read the blog anymore, I just stare at the torso 😀

    Bella – best wishes on your hear 😀 I have the toughest week at the uni – so I look like a complete mess. Guess, comes with a territory 😀

    Sad note. Beck stopped being entertaining to me since he makes more and more slips about his persona.
    I am a great believer, that if you LIE, do it at least on a level, no one can notice.
    So, a suggestion: time to create a new persona for my all time favourite trolly.
    May I suggest a member of a royal family of your choice? Then I can entertain my fantasy of having a hot night of non stop sex with prince Harry 😀

  639. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “nuts, I should have trademarked it… Snooze ya lose, I guess. If you end up getting royalties from it, remember where ya got it!” Dorky

    Oh, I won’t forget. I plan on making bazillions! Then I’ll come back on SA as a sugar mama seeking a non-drinking, sensitive (but sexy…because dorky is sexy) male SB. 😉

  640. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    LOL, Jersey. Of course you must know I’m not referring to all Jersey men, just the way too much hair gel, spikey headed, Ed Hardy wearing, socially inept, annoying guys with over-inflated egos who still throw keggers and down Muscle Milk with a grunt…while kissing their biceps with adoration.

    I knew a guy like that personally. I finally learned why some men act like that. Let’s just say I’ve held bigger Bic lighters in my hand.

  641. Jersey Darling says:

    “(Also known as the book of words for the likes of Jersey Shore dudes!)” – Rosie

    Hey hey now!

  642. Spicey says:

    Night Sugars, time to work!

  643. Principium says:

    Oh January Jones! She can have many different looks. I like her. She’s cool.

  644. Spicey says:

    Betty Draper :)

  645. Principium says:

    Who’s that in your stock photo Nicey?

  646. Principium says:

    Who said you’d be standing?

    Don’t cringe Kitten, but tingle. Remember the objective was to lubricate the limbic system and get that fiber optic link lit up…

  647. Spicey says:

    A man can ALWAYS order club soda, ice, lime and drink it all night with no questions, challenges, or questions. Perhaps you are thirsty, can’t argue with that and it ends the conversation immediately. It’s what I do when I travel to professional events that are heavily dominated by men. That way, they assume I am drinking when in truth I am not.

    Capitol P – Sometimes on this board I am reminded that I am a girl. The thought of “One morning of awkwardness beats the heck outta a whole night of loneliness – There is no walk of shame in P’s book!” made my vagina cringe.

    Not a one night stand girl. :)

  648. TraderJ says:

    @Dorky – “TraderJ I never had anyone suggest alcoholism in my family, but I have had lots of folks look at me like I’m some kind of alien. To keep from drawing attention, I learned to order a beer and just keep it 3/4 full.”

    I always that moment when they offer you something and I say no thanks, then they offer something else I say no thanks, then to stop it from going on through every bottle they own I saw I actually don’t drink, then they give me oh you poor little baby look and stuff like “oh I’m sorry” or “I understand” ummmm you do, please tell me I would love to hear it…

  649. Principium says:

    @ Nicey, “I have never had the walk of shame!”

    You know my mantra Kitten:

    “One morning of awkwardness beats the heck outta a whole night of loneliness”

    There is no walk of shame in P’s book!

  650. Principium says:

    @ Becky “Why not just tell her that you have to go bar hopping then, and leave?”

    Solid second option. Need to be over 21 though with a valid ID (in the US anyway)

  651. DorkyGuy says:

    “LOL, Dorky! Adding that one to the PRICKtionary! (Also known as the book of words for the likes of Jersey Shore dudes!) :mrgreen: “~Rosey

    nuts, I should have trademarked it… Snooze ya lose, I guess. If you end up getting royalties from it, remember where ya got it!

    @TraderJ~ I never had anyone suggest alcoholism in my family, but I have had lots of folks look at me like I’m some kind of alien. To keep from drawing attention, I learned to order a beer and just keep it 3/4 full.

  652. Beach_Girl says:

    I have never had the walk of shame!
    Spicey~ that was so funny lol… I can see that happening in a movie or something lol

  653. TraderJ says:

    @ Dorky – “And yes, I agree. Watching other people get drunk is a riot. Being the designated driver is right up my alley.”

    Yup, many moons ago, too many to count on my hands and toes when I was a young lad when all my buddies would go out drinking they always knew I would get them home safely… and I did… but perhaps sometimes not always to the right home 😉 Nothing funnier that dropping four guys off four wrong houses and have them all calling me in morning going what the hell? Although I do recall one of our friends had a very hot sister and sometimes when we were out one of the other friends would say if you drop me off at the wrong house tonight can it be her house hahaha

  654. TraderJ says:

    @ Rosie O’Gravy – “Wow, TJ! You’ve never had an alcohol based drink in your life? I don’t know if I should say I’m impressed or I’m sorry.”

    I have not and don’t worry I hear that all the time, haha. Or actually a lot of times the first reaction is people will say stuff like well if alcohol has been a problem in your family.. WTF?? I don’t drink so the rest of my families are all drunks haha… honestly there is no reason other than I never started so never become part of that culture.. and I can’t see any reason to start now I guess if there was some cool thing my life was missing and drinking would add that, but yeah just meh

  655. Spicey says:

    Rosie – warning, never drink hot beverages when reading the blog, you just may snort coffee out your nose … thanks :)

  656. DorkyGuy says:

    @TraderJ~ holy crap.. I have never been drunk, or even close to it. I am stunned to see someone else on the blog similarly disposed, especially given the status symbol of being an alcohol connoisseur that folks take so much pride in.. I think the SBs could have a field day psychoanalyzing that.

    And yes, I agree. Watching other people get drunk is a riot. Being the designated driver is right up my alley.

  657. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    Wow, TJ! You’ve never had an alcohol based drink in your life? I don’t know if I should say I’m impressed or I’m sorry. Just kidding. I have friends who don’t drink at all and they always have valid reasons for it. Must have been a riot to watch your friends make fools of themselves!

    @Spicey – I nearly fell out of my chair laughing!!! Esp at “jeans trailing behind you…” Oh. my. gosh.

  658. Beach_Girl says:

    TraderJ~ I use to bar tend and yeah, being sober at the end of the night and seeing the people come in the next night… Hilarious!

  659. Spicey says:

    … or the Coyote crawl, the moment when you discover you are in bed with said butter face and realize that you must belly crawl out of their apartment, jeans trailing behind you, rather than risk the awkward brunch and “let’s get together again sometime” hug.

  660. TraderJ says:

    @ Rosie O’Gravy – I have indeed heard the term but never seen such a wonderful description of it. I must tell you I am not a drinker, not meaning I don’t drink much meaning I have never had an alcohol based drink in my life. I tell you this only to setup this…. nothing funnier in the whole world then being out with friends when I was younger who were all hammered and watching them dancing or making moves on girls that I knew in the morning there were going to have gnaw their arms off to get away from. Then being able to point out said girls to them the next time we saw them as being sober I remembered every detail.. oddly I remember that as being a whole lot of fun haha

  661. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    LOL, Dorky! Adding that one to the PRICKtionary! (Also known as the book of words for the likes of Jersey Shore dudes!) :mrgreen:

    Another way to tell you drank too much the night before? Easy. You go to bed with a 10…and wake up with a 2!

    If you wake up with a 10…

    it means you’re the 2. 😕

  662. Beach_Girl says:

    Rosie~ right?!?!? blah!

  663. DorkyGuy says:

    RE: Coyote Ugly…. I guess the polar opposite would be Coyote Hot. This is a girl so hot that you would cut off your own penis and send it to her, just in the hope that she will use it to pleasure herself. Hopefully you do not make this decision under the influence of beer goggles.

  664. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    @TraderJ – Too too funny! Are you familiar with the term “coyote ugly”?

    A situation encountered after a night of consuming alcohol whereby a person, usually male, wakes the next morning in a strange bed with a sexual partner from the previous evening who is completely physically undesirable (see ugly, nasty, two bagger) and sleeping on the man’s arm. The hapless male would rather gnaw off his own arm than wake the woman and have to face the ills of his intoxicated choices the previous evening. Originating from a phenomena whereby a coyote captured in a jaw trap will chew off its own leg to escape certain death.

  665. Spicey says:

    … said cups now limping painful back to their lace demi cup, tail between legs. :(

    Lol

    Must work, you people are too damn distracting! Back to Frank and Flyr talking about tax policy so that I can get bored and wander off blog to do some work.

  666. TraderJ says:

    @ Rosie O’Gravy – the term that is used so often in Canada (I assume elsewhere in some form) is “beer goggles” damn that girl looked so hot last night when I had my beer goggles on. This morning ouch, train wreck… of course she is thinking the exact same thing.

  667. DorkyGuy says:

    An alternate response:

    “You may not provide oral tonight. You ate insufficiently spicy food, and so your tongue will be an unsuitable texture for pleasuring Sir Richard. A specific density of erect taste buds is required, or it’s just not worth the effort. Of course, I can tell. This fleabag hotel advertises 1500 thread count Egyptian cotton sheets, but these are at best 1470 threads per inch, and caused a fitful slumber.”

  668. TraderJ says:

    @ Spicey – “TJ – Thank you for finally recognizing that some of us who talked about ‘value’ did so with respectable market research behind our statements. 😉 I could just rub my perfect ‘B’ cups all over your face.”

    I’m sorry if I gave you impression I didn’t think you were valuing yourself how you felt was fair, I was merely commenting on the fact that the things you talk about offering hold zero value to me, so I naturally wouldn’t attached such a value to time spent with you.

    I was quite sure that you were more than bright enough to understand your target market and get full value for the assets you offer. It was never my intention to question how YOU valued yourself, simply offering how I value things for me.

    I will have to decline your very generous offer of face rubbing, but I am sure dorky or beck will happily jump in :-) Although lets just let it be said here and now if I was gonna “try” to impress you, you can be damn sure I’m be sending the private jet down to pick up haha

  669. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    @TraderJ – I always heard it as beauty is in the eye of the BEERholder. 😉

    @Principium – Oh, god. A man should never beg for sex. Well, unless D/s is his kink.

    “I had one SD ask when my time of the month was and asked to see to make sure…” – Beach_Girl</b.

    Uh, oh my! 😯

  670. Spicey says:

    Gentlemen:

    The high dollar SD who doesn’t want to touch the girl exists. He’s not common, but he does exist. It’s a fetish. It is such a complicated arrangement though that most girls aren’t able to keep up their end – it’s so much easier to just fuck and get it over with.

    In the “look but don’t touch” arrangement you have to fuck with the guy’s mind every second – and he wants it, but he’ll fight against it. If you give in for a second you’ll get iced. But, he’ll lay on the sweet so thick it’s really hard to say no. He calls to tell you how beautiful and perfect you are, texts constantly, sends gifts that are too lavish for the workplace, etc. and you have to be a complete narcissistic, entitled, princess.

    He absolutely worships pussy – but the pussy is never allowed to be touched, by ANYONE, ever, or even suggest that it would want to be touched in ANY way! You have to be a complete museum piece. And, it is really hard to keep up the “I am so perfect” act constantly (well, except for me because I am *so* very perfect in every way, a real Mary Poppins.)

    TJ – Thank you for finally recognizing that some of us who talked about ‘value’ did so with respectable market research behind our statements. 😉 I could just rub my perfect ‘B’ cups all over your face.

  671. TraderJ says:

    @ Beck – “Why tempt me by calling me your son then, TJ, if you are not willing to be my Daddy?”

    My bad, sorry I won’t tempt you anymore

  672. Beck says:

    “Best response IMO: pick up a copy of the Economist off the coffee table ( 😉 ) and say, “I’m not in the mood to impregnate you anyway””

    Why not just tell her that you have to go bar hopping then, and leave?

  673. Beach_Girl says:

    Just Coz:
    Sofitel London St James London England
    Venue Type Luxury Hotel
    Brand Sofitel Hotels
    Northstar Rating 4 Stars
    Distance From Airport 10 Miles
    Year Built 2002
    Number of Sleeping Rooms 184
    Number of Meeting Rooms 12
    Meeting Room Space 7,000 Sq. Ft.

  674. Beck says:

    Why tempt me by calling me your son then, TJ, if you are not willing to be my Daddy?

  675. TraderJ says:

    @ Beck – “Will you be my Daddy, TJ?”

    See told ya, passed already… that was easy right?

  676. Beck says:

    “This too shall pass my son….”

    Will you be my Daddy, TJ?

  677. Beach_Girl says:

    Dorky~ did anyone ever give you a hard time coz you posted too much? if so, let me at them 😀

  678. Beck says:

    Principium, No man, there is a lot of comments there about my lack of sexual prowess, insensitivity, and being a liar who is in love with himself. I would rather you don’t read it. She also wished that I get a future frigid gf as that would suit me right.

  679. Beach_Girl says:

    TraderJ~ hahaha you crack me up lol…

  680. TraderJ says:

    @ Beck – “Holy crap, I agreed twice with you in a span of an hour.”

    This too shall pass my son….

  681. DorkyGuy says:

    lol, Good Lord… I don’t know if Guru tracks these things, but this may be a one day record. And on a Wednesday?

    Each and every one of you are hereby disqualified from giving me a hard time when I post too much. So it is written, and so it is done!

  682. Bella says:

    Holy shit, blog explosion lol. To everyone who responded to my post about my grandmother on the last topic, thank you! :)

    So while I was out with a pot SD on the weekend I met this Italian hairdresser at a bar who fell in love with my hair and really wants to make it magical or something haha (I wasn’t feeling the pot SD and thought a shfancy bar would be a good place to keep an eye out for another. Plus the pot SD went up to bed lol). I’m seeing him this weekend and he’s super excited, he’s called me twice and has been telling people about me. I think he might be interested in sugar but I have the feeling he may want something more so I’ll have to feel it out. In any case, getting my hair done by a professional who does hair for NYC Fashion Week and then we’re going out for a night on the town! Woot! 😀

  683. Beck says:

    “Beck – “What if she won’t even allow you to get sex on the side?”

    Well then I guess she wouldn’t be perfect in every way now would she?”

    Holy crap, I agreed twice with you in a span of an hour.

  684. Principium says:

    Just to help the brothers in here:

    When a woman says that she does not want to have sex, the worst thing ever is to get pouty, angry, seem butt-hurt or WORSTER (haha) is to beg!

    Best response IMO: pick up a copy of the Economist off the coffee table ( 😉 ) and say, “I’m not in the mood to impregnate you anyway”

  685. Beach_Girl says:

    TraderJ~ the site is time consuming for sure, lots of people to sort through

  686. Beach_Girl says:

    FBSD~ does it always mean something else when we aren’t in the mood for sex? I don’t think so, you guys are reading into things here 😀
    I had one SD ask when my time of the month was and asked to see to make sure lol…Really??? crazy crap!

  687. TraderJ says:

    @ FBSD – I actually don’t know the downtown core very well and I don’t ever use public transit, but I do know from people that partake that they consider Vancouver to have outstanding looking escorts. But you beauty is in the eye of the beholder and all that stuff.

    @ Beck – “What if she won’t even allow you to get sex on the side?”

    Well then I guess she wouldn’t be perfect in every way now would she?

    @ Beach Girl – I just think it’s my ability or expectation of the site, I am sure I will do just fine IRL

  688. Principium says:

    Beck, let me read it

  689. FatBastardSD says:

    @Principium

    As everyone knows “It’s not you, it’s me” really means “It’s you”.

    Men are funny. Endless discussion of how to know what a woman wants when
    “I’m not in the mood to have sex” implies “I’m not in the mood to have sex with you” really says all that needs to be said.

  690. Beach_Girl says:

    TraderJ~ yes, very misleading… But you in BC have a lot of options, and you still can’t find a SB on SA? that s odd… The SB I new in BC, I fixed up with a great SD and they are still together 😀 Wish I new another one, sorry.

    Principium~ Hey!

    Jersey Girl~ 😀

  691. Beck says:

    “I think I might be part of the exception to that rule. I can live with the girl not having sex if everything else I am looking for is perfect”

    What if she won’t even allow you to get sex on the side?

  692. Jersey Darling says:

    @Principium: “Although women are often more controlled and disciplined than men are when it comes to sex, they posses a much grander appetite and endurance for sex than most men do. I often joke with male buddies and tell them that when a woman says, “I’m not in the mood to have sex” they really out to complete the sentence and add the omitted two words, “with you” at the end of their sentences.”

    *snicker*

    But really, who isn’t in the mood for sex? Yes sometimes it is a pain logistically if you’ve just gotten out of the shower and don’t want to mess yourself all up, but usually it is worth it.

  693. FatBastardSD says:

    @TraderJ

    You may not know this as public transport might not be for your thing. There is the 99B Line (?) bus that drives into the downtown core and passes by a large adult club. There always seemed to be prostitutes on this street (who openly propositioned me every time I got off the bus).

    I was really shocked at how good looking these girls were.

    Was I imagining things?

  694. TraderJ says:

    @ Beach Girl – I don’t research it I just copied it ha ha.. I think you have look at the numbers more deeply than they did to come up with any valuable data. I realize the point of those articles is sell memberships but they are misleading at best.

    @ FBSD – I had a girl email telling me she was making 100k a month in her own business and she has no free time and her weekends are tied up, then proceeded to say if I felt 10K was too much for her company one day a week we weren’t on the same page.. I agree I closed that book real quick.

    @ Principium – I think I might be part of the exception to that rule. I can live with the girl not having sex if everything else I am looking for is perfect as stated it’s the closed mind approach of saying in your profile NEVER sex that kinda creeps me out.

  695. Beck says:

    By the way Principium, just got a really long email from my ex. Read it or delete it?

  696. Beck says:

    “To answer Beck’s Q, if a woman never wants to have sex with you (generalization) then she’s just not into you (again generalization)”

    But what if she was otherwise perfect? Let her go?

  697. Principium says:

    Hey BG 😉

  698. Principium says:

    While on the topic of no sexual liaisons:

    Women have such a thing which I call ASD (Anti Slut Defenses) for various social stigma reasons in addition to their mental & evolutionary processes.

    Although women are often more controlled and disciplined than men are when it comes to sex, they posses a much grander appetite and endurance for sex than most men do. I often joke with male buddies and tell them that when a woman says, “I’m not in the mood to have sex” they really out to complete the sentence and add the omitted two words, “with you” at the end of their sentences.

    To answer Beck’s Q, if a woman never wants to have sex with you (generalization) then she’s just not into you (again generalization)

  699. FatBastardSD says:

    @Principium

    The one I met was in the negotiable range. But she was getting “Beck” offers of $10K/month (well thats what she told me when we met). The main reason was that I decided to look locally (10Mile radius) and there were almost no SB’s available, I had some evenings to kill, so I figured why not see what this was all about. I did explore some of the more bizarre SB profiles that I found for this reason.

    @TraderJ

    The best unsolicited message I received was from a young women a long distance away who I would not classify as attractive in any way. She told me she only talks to older guys who look like Brad Pitt (along those lines) and I needed to give my private photo permissions in my reply so she would decide if I was worth her time.

  700. Beach_Girl says:

    TraderJ~ I don’t think I agree with the montreal numbers. Lots of SDs here want escort type SBs
    Hummm young SDs, :( I’m older….

  701. TraderJ says:

    Vancouver is the best city in Canada for young women to find a sugar daddy, according to a recent breakdown of SeekingArrangement.com membership numbers.

    The international site is dedicated to matching wealthier men with “attractive, intelligent, ambitious and goal oriented” sugar babies.

    According to the figures, Vancouver has 3.86 would-be sugar daddies for every 1,000 adult males. Toronto, Edmonton and Calgary are second, third and fourth on the list.

    According to the site, the average sugar daddy is 38 years old and makes about $271,198.

    “The term ‘sugar daddy’ is no longer reserved for the wealthy, older man. Rather, it is a lifestyle embodied by single men who have a genuine, vested interest in adding value to their partners’ lives,” says Brandon Wade, founder of SeekingArrangement.com. “Last year, the number of single men joining our website doubled, reducing the number of married men who engage in this lifestyle.”

    The average daddy spends about $4,307 a month on his sugar baby, or about 19% of his income.

    Top 10 best Canadian cities to find a sugar daddy:

    (Based on the number of sugar daddies per every 1000 adult males)

    1. Vancouver 3.86

    2. Toronto 2.90

    3. Edmonton 2.39

    4. Calgary 2.26

    5. Montreal 2.18

    6. Mississauga, Ont. 1.76

    7. London, Ont. 1.62

    8. Windsor 1.41

    9. Ottawa 1.27

    10. Winnipeg 1.06

  702. Beck says:

    ” it’s the closed mind aspect of someone excluding sex with someone they’ve not even met yet…”

    Actually, I agree with you there. First time for everything, huh?

  703. Beach_Girl says:

    I didn’t know BC was the SD capital of Can now, it use to be TO. Why can’t it be MTL??? ah well….

  704. TraderJ says:

    @ Beck – I don’t believe you even know when you are serious or not, but your question is moot as I’ve said already sex is not my motivating factor. So to answer this…

    “TJ, Serious question. If you find a woman who is fantastic in every other way and a perfect match for you, a dream girl if you will, but would not let you touch her at all, would you let her go?”

    Of course I would not let her go. It’s not that I think all girls need to have sex with all their guys as to each their own whatever works blah blah blah.. it’s the closed mind aspect of someone excluding sex with someone they’ve not even met yet… get it?

  705. Beach_Girl says:

    I am back Sugars!!! finally my day is done!!! 😀

    Rosie~ Nice that you are helping out, I think that is what us SBs should do. I know I set up a few SBs with pot SDs that didn’t work for me, but were real. Some worked very well 😀

    TraderJ~ I think you have to be realistic in this. Its crazy to think that some SBs want 10k just to sit and smile with you?!?!?? I don’t get it.

    Principium~ 😀

  706. Beck says:

    TJ, Serious question. If you find a woman who is fantastic in every other way and a perfect match for you, a dream girl if you will, but would not let you touch her at all, would you let her go?

  707. TraderJ says:

    @ Principium – I noticed today in the paper that my city was voted best sugar daddy city in Canada. They quoted membership stats from SA, which now I guess it means all these girls from other parts of the country think they can come here and guys are just going to throw money at them. It’s really odd, I mean it would be easy to say some of the SB on the blog come across as motivated by money only etc.. but you have to give them credit at least they understand the dynamics and the give and take nature of how it all works, not to mention they seem to have a fairly realistic value of what they believe they are worth as proven to them via past arrangements.

    @ FBSD – I have actually a couple of times thought about meeting up with some of the crazier profiles just for the social study of doing so, but I just don’t have that much free time to piss away on such things. I actually got an email this morning or yesterday whatever from girl who’s tagline was something like, you pay to look at me, not touch me… ummmm or not pay you at all… that works for me.. I don’t even care if they want to have sex or not so much it’s just the closed mind that is so sad more as at such a young age..

  708. Principium says:

    FB, not a rhetorical Q but why would you even waste time setting up a meeting with a 10K SB? (specially the ones who choose the 5-10 range yet state that they are seeking the top of the range) Was it just curiosity?

  709. FatBastardSD says:

    @TraderJ

    If you want to observe a bpd or narcissistic individual first hand, set up a meeting with one of the $10K platonic SB’s. The thinking is that you are a loser and are unable to find any woman to acknowledge your existence so you are easy prey. I met one girl who believed she was a SB for altruistic reasons. These women are SB Beck’s of the internet.

  710. Principium says:

    TJ, a lot of that delusional stuff is how things are reported in the media.

    For instance about 4-5 weeks ago, there was a piece in the local news down here about SD/SB arrangements, and SA in particular was mentioned. The incogniti girl who they were interviewing (supposedly a single mother college SB) was brazenly saying that she has an overseas older benefactor whom she had only met with twice (in two years of arrangement!) who has been financially assisting her with tuition, living expenses and shopping for all that time, WITHOUT any sexual liaison.

    People embellish such stories and the naive types buy it. If there are on going asexual types of arrangements going on, on sites such as SA, Nicey can dip me in tar and roll me in feathers!

  711. Rosie O'Gravy says:

    “Rosie~ I like your posts, I hope you stick around.” – Beach_Girl

    Thanks, Beach. I’ve been following the blog off and on for about 5-6 years (taking looong breaks in between). It definitely goes through many characters and stage changes. I’m sad to see some of the past bloggers who brought invaluable advice no longer posting. I myself have had wonderful success with SA, but agree it is not what it used to be. I no longer participate in the sugar world, but have been helping a friend who confided in me that she wants to find an arrangement. I helped her set up a profile, shared with her the good, bad and ugly of what I went through and recommended she visit the blog to learn from other members. She told me last week she felt the blog was too “catty” and she couldn’t relate to what posters were sharing. Her comment made me curious so I jumped on to catch up and saw exactly what she was referring to. That’s when I decided I would try to participate a little — at least to make an effort to change the tune a little back to being a helpful place to ask for or offer advice, share frustrations and/or good news and just a community where one can feel safe discussing a lifestyle that most prefer to keep private.

    The bantering isn’t bothersome and sometimes can be quite entertaining. That stuff’s been happening for as long as I can remember. It’s the on-going lack of maturity and the obvious inability to maintain a calm and logical approach to conflict. It’s like walking into dramaholics anonymous.

    Oh well.

    “Never argue with an idiot. Bystanders won’t be able to tell the difference.”

  712. DianaSBinOC says:

    Who is a troll here? I can’t tell since the conversations seem rather entertaining and quite informative. Maybe I’m missing something or I just forgot to care.

    @BG~

    @ Spicey~ Yes, you do come across like you don’t like your SD, Just what I have read in your posts. You are not the only one that doesn’t care, I see many are like that, just want their payday and that’s it. To each their own

    I haven’t read everything Spicey posted about her SD but so far I had a very different take on things. He sounds submissive and is seeking “pity attention”. In other words “poor me”.

    My friend is seeing a SD (not through any sites) and he does something similar. Generally he continues to test to see if she cares so he goes to such lengths to elicit any bit of emotion out of her. His real issue lies with him seeing her as a woman that should want more than NSA. In other words ” why aren’t you clingy?”, “why aren’t you asking to be my gf”. The very thing he stated he wasn’t looking for seems to be exactly what he desperately desires.

    It’s not all uncommon that when someone gets what they want, they still aren’t satisfied.

  713. TraderJ says:

    @ Beck

    Than as per usual you either can’t read choose not to read or are just continuing to try to be the sad little troll you’ve proven to be time and time again.

    I will give you credit for sticking around, even after all the obvious lies you’ve been caught it, it takes some stones to continue on like nobody noticed them. I just can’t figure out the point for you what the end game is… likely never well.

    Either way enjoy yourself seems little else in life brings you any pleasure

  714. Beck says:

    TJ, I thought you wanted the SB to be herself and a great windsurfer. Didn’t realize it was all about sex for you.

    Why not get a $200/hour hooker?

  715. Beck says:

    By the way, Fatty, if you are reading, I am solidly in the land of $200/hour hookers now.

  716. TraderJ says:

    @ Beck – “I thought it was all about good windsurfing for you?”

    Than as per usual you either can’t read choose not to read or are just continuing to try to be the sad little troll you’ve proven to be time and time again.

    I will give you credit for sticking around, even after all the obvious lies you’ve been caught it, it takes some stones to continue on like nobody noticed them. I just can’t figure out the point for you what the end game is… likely never well.

    Either way enjoy yourself seems little else in life brings you any pleasure

  717. Principium says:

    “If you’re whispering in my ear you’d better be pulling my hair!”

    Which self-respecting cad/dad doesn’t!

  718. Principium says:

    Crossfit is great. Cardio kick-boxing is lots of fun, but with a trainer (can become expensive) I don’t condone hitting heavy bags like they constantly do in these new fad kickboxing & MMA type gyms, sprouting up everywhere.

    There are a lot of certified trainers, but very few are worth their own salt. A great trainer knows about different energy bands in different individuals. This is very important to devise a program which is both very effective and also result oriented without becoming injurious. When I see these infomercials on TV about the most popular use at home fitness programs and their lofty claims (not naming names) I just SMH!

    For those interested in a good one, try GSP’s RushFit. This must bring a smile to the faces of our resident Canuks in here :)

  719. Beck says:

    “I just don’t what they think they can possibly offer of value to another human being to pay that amount for them?”

    I thought it was all about good windsurfing for you?

  720. Beck says:

    Don’t forget the $1 hummers.

  721. TraderJ says:

    @ Principium – I hear ya after living in BKK for so long when I would meet a girl that tried to present herself as a “good girl” simply meaning nothing to do with the nightlife industry soon as they used terms like “teeruk” and “farang” you knew very well they were pros at some point in the past. Or surprisingly the better their English was the more likely they were to have worked in the P4P biz.

    I have been shocked by some of the emails I receive just the complete lack of understanding of the actual point of the site. I can accept the wish that they want sexual activity to come in time and it’s not a first meeting or first month thing, as that’s not my main issue. But when they state in their profiles there will NEVER be sexual activity of any kind but they are saying they need 10k and up… I just don’t what they think they can possibly offer of value to another human being to pay that amount for them? I mean they might I guess, I just can’t figure out how they can with a straight face ask for that right out of the gate.

  722. Spicey says:

    I crack myself up when I read Grace Kelly say things like that. Who knew she was such a shameless tramp?

  723. Spicey says:

    If you’re whispering in my ear you’d better be pulling my hair!

  724. Principium says:

    What words? Let me whisper in your ears…

  725. Spicey says:

    What words? What words? What words?!!!

    Do I need to be jelly again and bat my eyes for a little physical therapy?

  726. Spicey says:

    Capitol P – I actually prefer Crossfit, I just liked the rhythm of “elliptical” in that sentence. I am freakishly strong for a skinny girl, but I get winded by the front steps – unfortunate effect of a little heart defect from childhood.

  727. Beck says:

    “One has started to use certain words in text messages which can be considered as endearing terms, but having been a wh*remonger in the past, my radar is very sensitive to those terms. I guess that I’m too messed up.”

    No, just pragmatic.

  728. Principium says:

    @ Nicey, don’t waste your time with the elliptical for 11 month. Allow me to show you how! How’s your stamina?

    P.S. Not that sorta stamina which you evidently enjoy!

  729. Beck says:

    “Can you and Spicey please set up approximately a two week vacation together? In all fairness, I think you should give her $40K because she will give you an experience like no other.”

    Why do you think she will give me an experience like no other, when you do not know my other experiences?

  730. Beck says:

    “20 some years and you still haven’t adjusted to the surroundings? Clearly you are going to be way too prissy for Spicey.”

    No doubt.

  731. Jersey Darling says:

    Beck, I have a question for you.

    Can you and Spicey please set up approximately a two week vacation together? In all fairness, I think you should give her $40K because she will give you an experience like no other.

  732. Principium says:

    TJ,

    Point noted on your earlier post about BC being a major college campus sorta city. She was DDG just based on her appearance, looks and aesthetics. As alluded to before, a real dim witted person as gauged by her email responses, but then again, I have a kind of humor at times which is not for everyone, specially the model-type women who get absolutely ZERO compliment from me, unless one considers, “oh you are interesting looking” as a great compliment 😉

    This time around I have exchanged 7 numbers out of which, I have decided 4 of them being dead ends. There are 3 active ones, of which only one I’m actually interested in meeting up with. One has started to use certain words in text messages which can be considered as endearing terms, but having been a wh*remonger in the past, my radar is very sensitive to those terms. I guess that I’m too messed up.

    If anything comes of the strong POT prospect, I may just have to stop by in UT once, instead of twice, when on my planned tour to hang out with BG & Sweetie 😉

  733. Beck says:

    “But, are the elevators to the left or the right when you walk into the lobby?”

    You know, I don’t quite remember. Do you want me to?

    I wish I were Jason bond. Then I would be able to sit down in a diner with my travel companion and immediately know where all the exits are, and where would be the best place to get a gun.

  734. Spicey says:

    TJ – Most men are. I grew up in Utah after all and Park City (which is a joke only locals would understand)

  735. TraderJ says:

    @ Beck – “Since I was 10, actually.”

    20 some years and you still haven’t adjusted to the surroundings? Clearly you are going to be way too prissy for Spicey.

  736. Spicey says:

    But, are the elevators to the left or the right when you walk into the lobby?

  737. Beck says:

    “Have you been doing that leisure activity since you were 3? ;-)”

    Since I was 10, actually.

  738. TraderJ says:

    @ Beck – “The universe works in mysterious ways. My leisure today and tomorrow requires me to be far from civilization, where a Hilton Garden Inn is considered the height of opulence.”

    Have you been doing that leisure activity since you were 3? 😉

  739. Beck says:

    “how does someone like you end up in a shitty hotel?”

    The universe works in mysterious ways. My leisure today and tomorrow requires me to be far from civilization, where a Hilton Garden Inn is considered the height of opulence.

  740. Jersey Darling says:

    Beck, how does someone like you end up in a shitty hotel?

    The nerve of the universe boggles my mind! But hey, send me some wings, I love them.

  741. Spicey says:

    Capitol P – A week of sun, sand, and releasing my inner fat girl for 14,000 calories a day of all inclusive debauchery (which I will then spend 11 months on the elliptical trying to ward off before doing it all over again.)

  742. Spicey says:

    The “and” implicated my additional plots to over inflate my ego and lies. Perhaps I needed the …

  743. Principium says:

    I see that everyone is behaving nicely. Question is, who wants to misbehave with me? Nicey, you taking off somewhere my naughty minx?

  744. Beck says:

    “I thought you said you were in NY or did I get that confused?”

    I was.

  745. TraderJ says:

    @ Beck “Or if you are stuck in the middle of nowhere in a shitty hotel in the midwest/south, and the best dish in the room service menu is chicken wings.”

    I thought you said you were in NY or did I get that confused?

  746. Beck says:

    Just a warning, Spicey. I usually win in hatred competitions. But I always welcome a good challenge.

  747. Jersey Darling says:

    Spicey, don’t leave us hanging.

  748. Spicey says:

    Damn you! Nefarious super villian of disdain …

    I shall post a Gravatar of myself winning the Miss Hawaiian Tropic competition so that I might raise the ante of acrimony.

    … Now, let me just open Photoshop so that I can create said photo and

  749. Beck says:

    “feeding the troll when you are stuck on the computer at least helps pass the time.”

    Or if you are stuck in the middle of nowhere in a shitty hotel in the midwest/south, and the best dish in the room service menu is chicken wings.

  750. Beck says:

    Which means I raised her hatred level faster, so I win!

  751. Spicey says:

    Beck – she’s hated me longer, so I win!!!

  752. Beck says:

    Good answer. I would have been heartbroken if you chose to hate Spicey more than you hate me.

  753. TraderJ says:

    @ Jersey Darling – I was thinking the same thing, can you imagine the look on poor Spicey’s face when Beck’s mom calls him up from the basement and she sees him in all his glory in his wife beater and Hawaiian shorts, wearing socks and sandals. Once he sees her he runs the other way screaming ewwwww it’s a girl they have cooties.

    I do have to admit I think Spicey is on to something feeding the troll when you are stuck on the computer at least helps pass the time.

  754. Jersey Darling says:

    Hahaha, oh Beck, you mischievous darling troll. I am an equal opportunity hater and lover.

  755. Beck says:

    JD, Who do you hate more? Spicey or me?