9 years ago
Celebrating the Holidays With Sugar

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Do the Holidays Bring Sugar, or Coal?

Giving gifts, eating pie, sharing wholesome moments with family and friends… something we all can identify with. The Holiday spirit… right? H’mmm, something tells me not all of us are as eager for the upcoming holiday season as our friends at Hallmark would like us to be.

One Sugar Baby Writes:

“The holidays are always a difficult time for me. My family is out of town, all my friends are romantically connected and my Sugar Daddy (SD) is married. Most are involved with family and friends and have little time to see the SB. For me, this, is one of the reasons a SD helps out financially. Not only to help with the material needs but also to help during those emotional and personal times when he cannot be there. It’s not a substitute, but it helps a bit.”

How should Sugar Daddies and Sugar Babies handle holiday gatherings, gift giving, and overall celebration? What special things can a Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby do to make his or her Sugar feel special during this holiday season?

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68 Responses to “Celebrating the Holidays With Sugar”

  1. Tommy todd says:

    Looking for gay men 25 to 50 for get togethers

  2. Enrique Ibanez says:

    Hey!. This is all about taste. I completely agree with you regarding \”Sugar Daddy Holiday\”, but I think you are in the thin line of thinling. Don\’t you? Maybe you can try types of penny candy

  3. sweetredhead269443 says:

    On Blog topic…..(sometimes we actually get there lol) I was married 20 yrs. We were friends first and stayed that way, even now. I think that is important in any relationship. And sex well when we first got married of course it was 2 to 3 times a day. Even after 20 yrs it was least 2x’s a week even went through times it was everyday. So Chemistry does have to be there. As in any relationship you can’t just “let it be” You “catch” your man and just get comfortable. You have to spice things up. Do things for each other and not let the relationship get boring. Especially in the bedroom. My aunt told me when I got married, Don’t let yourself go. Always look good for your husband, never take your relationship for granted. She was married over 50 yrs!

  4. sweetredhead269443 says:

    well we ARE a great vacation destination lmao

    • Robert says:

      Hi sweetredhead…I’m Robert…heard your story and it sounds like u had the type of marriage as me…25yrs for me…there was to much drama and lying and cheating…I consider myself a very strong outgoing ..great man…my kindness was taken for weakness…but I have learned now…unfortunately to little to late…lol..I’m ready for the next chapter in my life…I’m looking for a new fresh start with that special person that wants to be as one !!!I’m an attractive country boy with a strong sex drive and I love the outdoors and love pleasing my mate…I have pics upon request…I’m very down to earth..simple man ..not hard to please… Looking for someone that shares the same values…if your interested in getting to noe more…please don’t hesitate to email me…I will cherish u and make u my one and only …hope to hear from you my love !!!.Winking at ya.

    • Tommy todd says:

      If u ever want a sugar daddy get in touch u r beaytiful

  5. Jim Spence says:

    Sunday I was looking for sites related to ski vacations but specifically for sites about puerto rico vacation deal and I found you site.

  6. MsLaDolceVita says:

    This is the first blog that I am reading on this site and I want to first say hello to everyone and second say thank you to SuthrnExec. I came on here expecting to read about everyone’s experiences with the holidays and found that the it was a getting to be a little too off topic. Lisa, I understand that you are going through a hard but so are some of us. It is just how you choose to deal with it. If you give off positive energy, expect it to come back to you. Take every moment that the Universe gives you and try to look at it positively. Me for instance, it is almost the holidays and I have been unemployed for almost 6 months. I am 26 years old, have a Bachelors degree, I live in NYC, have a puppy and have used all of my savings. I cannot find full-time job out here (as I am either too experienced or because everyone else is unemployed) and I don’t have money for rent, food, doctors, holiday gifts, stuff for my puppy, etc, but I am choosing to look through sites like Craigslist, like this, and to suck it up and ask friends if they have freelancing jobs available. There is always a way!!! Always!

    Now, back to topic. I love the holidays. I have not had an SD during this time and I would absolutely love to which is why I have decided to join this site. I think the holidays have to be handled on a personal basis. If my SD has a family I cannot expect him to leave them for me, but I would expect some recognition of me and my feelings about being away from one another, just like in a friendship or other relationship if you cannot be with that person you can always call, text, send a gift, or anything along those lines. I go home every Christmas to be with my family to regroup from the city life and be brought back to some kind of reality. To me there is nothing better than having traditions with the ones you love. Even if they are not “family”, if you have friends, it is nice to create something that you can do year-to-year that everyone is looking forward to. I also make sure that if anyone I know is alone during the holidays, I will invite them to come and celebrate with me and will welcome them in because everyone should feel loved during this time.

    Finally, about a posting in the beginning of this blog, I am definitely interested in a secret Santa SD/sb. I always loved doing that with my friends and sorority sisters. Why not on something like this? :) I times like this, why not do something fun like this to bring about some holiday cheer.

  7. printedpassions says:

    Holidays suck point blank. There is always some one around you that seems to have the better relationship, and the close by family. You look at yourself and you can only capture the flaws that put a damper on the Holidays. Have a drink and try to put it behind you. I don’t have an SD so money can’t help me out.

    This year’s holiday is tough. it will be a year since mom passed away, my brother is in san antonio, dad in puerto rico. I have no other family close by. I have a daughter, and her father is a twit. She is all I have. Don’t have enough vacation time left from work to take time off and enjoy it with her. Have to put on at least half a smile and swallow whatever I’m feeling. I can’t ruin it for the child (she’s 4).

  8. cre8tor says:

    ahh Crush…If only I could. I’m head over heels as well but maybe next year we’ll be together. Have a great time!

  9. crush says:

    I’m actually choosing to spend Thanksgiving with my SD. How could I resist? A top notch week at The Four Seasons spent in NYC? It’s just Thanksgiving and my family will be a little disappointed, but c’mon ladies, we only live once! I am one of the few who is actually head over heels for my SD. I am looking forward to sharing an intimate holiday with him.

  10. Gail says:

    Nice story with great ending:) Welcome to the Sugar Family coeddomme!

  11. coeddomme says:

    Hmm…first post on the blog…yay!

    Yeah, the holidays can be really hard to deal with. With my last SD, he spent the holidays with his kids in another state. I helped him shop for their Christmas presents and I even bought him a gift too (with his own money lol). Of course, he got me just about everything on my wish list.

    I wasn’t sure how to deal with him while he was with his family so I just sent him an e-mail wishing him a Merry Christmas. He responded almost immediately. Apparently, he wasn’t sure how to handle it either and he was glad to hear from me.

  12. SuthrnExec says:

    None sound promising – hang in there Lisa – on a bright note, when you do find the right one, it will be obvious so there’s still plenty of time.

  13. lisa says:

    ok so much for off the subject, I need an sd for christmas and my birthday which is next month. The 5 sds that contacted me this past few days:
    1. same guy who has written me several times before and wants me to fly at my expense to meet him and spend a week with him, wants me to leave as soon as possible, won’t come to meet me.

    2. married guy from forgein country who comes into town from time to time, still hasn’t told me what country. He wants to start a relationship and in time if things are working, he will help financially. he wants a free trial period

    3. guy wants dinner date and possible intimacy, no mention of anything else.

    4. guy wants very high maintainance woman to pamper and spoil. Is willing to be generous but sounds like he expects her to already be dolled up and spend alot of money to meet him. I don’t have the money to do that

    5. weird guy sends short messages and mentions somthing odd in his profile, something no one would say without they were subtling trying t0 bring something weird into a relationship, he also doesns’t want a pay to play situation aka as alllowance.

    so much for the train of bad prospects.

  14. Caligirl says:

    Ahhhhh…That’s why you are going to be an awesome SD during the holiday. In addition you exhibit many great qualities that we all like on the blog. To me you are a true gentleman. I love your style:)

  15. SuthrnExec says:

    If I may be so bold as to answer the question at the top of the blog :-) I love the holidays simply because it seems to bring the best out in people. If I were involved with a SB at the time, I’m not sure how i would handle the holidays – I have family (and kids) spread out all over the country so it would be a challenge. I would figure out a way to do something special for the SB without question.

  16. BlondeinNYC says:

    Oh Lisa, Lisa, Lisa! You would have loved the email I got this morning. His profile more or less states that he wants just sex. His email to me was one word. LMAO

  17. lisa says:

    I’m on a roll here, just got a third response today. My favorite kind, no photo, no info, no name, just a “do you want to get together” message. DELETE! where is my sd in this parade of response I have been getting today. Odd no messages for weeks and then in the past couple days , 5 in which 3 have been in the last few hours.

  18. lisa says:

    he isn’t offereing anything as far as I see other than dinner. And yes he does mention intimacy in his profile so he probably expects that too.

    What I mean by 999 is that when these guys put “less than 1000” in their budget there is no way of knowing if they are offering 999 or 50 dollars, unlike 1-3K which is steep for me, at least you know the minimum expectations, unlike under 1000

  19. lisa says:

    I sent him a message asking for more info, he has read it but not answered back. If he just wants to have dinner, forget it, why waste my time with a man who is married who just wants to meet for dinner , although he does mention intimate times in his profile. If he doesn’t give me the answer back that I want, I will not waste my time trying to make a good impression for dinner. Not worth rushing through all the important things to do that day for that. The other gentle who wrote me I think I will pass on as he wants a lady who is well primped at all times and all but on my budget and with my job, perfect manicured sculptured nails are not something I can maintain of afford. I read his profile and although he indicates he is generous, I think he expects to see a perfect arm candy woman on the first meeting. I could do that with a little pampering and money but don’t have the funds to spend on all that to meet someone for the first time. Plus he lives far away and I will not set myself up to be rejected or to waste his time on something I can’t fullfill.
    Oh well, got 2 messages today, at least the emails are coming in again.

  20. cre8tor says:

    Yep, I believe that is right. Don’t take the time from work. If he wants to meet for dinner, make the date when it works for you. You don’t need to take all day to get ready for a dinner. Ask him if he would mind having a taxi pick you up and take you home as your car is out of commission. He hasn’t said anything about any expectation beyond dinner. Just make sure he will agree to getting you home…alone. $999 is better than what you have now and you can continue to pursue other options…just as you should be doing with your job.

  21. BlondeinNYC says:

    Lisa, your “compensation” here is dinner.

  22. lisa says:

    Ok ladies I need advice. Got an offer from one gentleman to be his dinner date in about a month when he is in town on business. Looked at his profile, not a bad looking man, older, etc. Only mentions wanting a dinner date though and according to his profile info, he has few assets, obviously not a home owner, and makes less than 75k. His budget is less than 1K which could mean 999 or 100 dollars, who knows. I wouldn’t mind meeting this guy but if I am going to request the day off from work to make sure i’m off to get ready and meet him and all, and spend an evening with him at dinner, this meaning most of my day would be spent getting ready to meet him and then being his companion for the evening, I would like to think I would get some compensation for my time as it seems he is looking for a one time thing, someone to have dinner with while he is town. there are other things I have to do this particular day that I know of in advance , so it will be hectic and I want to make sure it is worth my while to meet him. Also being it will be an evening meeting I will probably be coming home in a taxi if I’m not confortable with him and that will cost me too, and at this time I have no money to spare for anything. should I or should I not accept his offer and how do I bring up compensation before hand rather than leave it chance and possibly end up coming home empty handed at my expense in a taxi.

  23. lisa says:

    Texas law sucks for renters and employees. We can be fired for no reason and they can lock you out of your apartment and hold your belonging ransom till you pay rent and penalties. However they don’t have to hold up there part of keepings fixed. My carpet hasn’t been cleaned in 2 years.
    I got 2 emails from sds but I have think about both of them as neither is that great of an offer. I will give more info later.

  24. BlondeinNYC says:

    Where I live the laws are such that they can’t evict you immediately. All I want is a job in my field.

  25. lisa says:

    well I have only worked in retail and phone solicitation (many years ago and wasn’t good at that at all) none of these jobs paid much but when I was married they were ok as it was extra income. I’m actually not good at much of anything, can’t follow directions if my life depended on it and I have anxiety attacks if i am around to many people. I had a job at a copy center which I liked and was scared when I got put in that department but after a couple years I was surprised at how much I had learned and thought I was doing a good job, but my supevisor didnt’ agree and was always complaining and saying I wasn’t fast enough up until the time I walked out and left her with a bunch of projects to do. My confidence in myself seems to be more than what my employers think of me. I am dependable, have only missed 3 days of work in my entire worklife of over 20 years, never later, work hard and do more, but I never get anywhere.

  26. cre8tor says:

    Look for something new entirely. not a second job

  27. lisa says:

    working 2 jobs would be difficult for me since I don’t have a car and public transport in my city is really bad, especially on weekends and after 6 pm. I try to work within my neighborhood so I only have to take one bus but I still find myself having to leave an hour early and getting home an hour after I get off work because of the irregular bus schedule. i tried working 2 jobs a while back and ended up losing the second one because i could not make the commute in between in time even though I had 2 hours, the bus connections made me half an hour late. I would just like to work one job a decent number of hours. All I asked for was 32 hours and could even survive on 26 at the rate they are paying me but they won’t even give me that. On top of that I am stuck in a union that I can’t get out of that takes a large deduction from my check and I don’t see anything I am getting from it. It is a grocery store so sales are steady but like most retail, they want to skimp on hours. the kids that live at home with their parents are getting 40 hours while I only get 20 and I have 10+ years experience. I like the departmetn I work in because it is nonfoods. I could never work around food because Of my constant allergies.

  28. cre8tor says:

    Lisa: One of the hats I wear is a recruiter for the restaurant business. Keep your eyes open for more jobs. Almost every employer is more comfortable hiring someone that already has a job. So, if this one is not giving you enough hours, look for another. Perfect excuse for leaving is that you want to work more, want a job that will give you the opportunity to help that business generate more sales…or whatever it is they are hiring you for. Be passionate about it. Don’t accept what the current job is offering you if it isn’t right for you. Alternatively, you could go to management and say you want to work (not that you need to)…show them how you can help their business. Make your future what you want.

  29. cre8tor says:

    BerkshireSD: thanks so much for the very insightful advice. And I agree with you completely. The first meet is something similar to a job interview albeit with physical for monetary aspects involved. But, I have always thought focusing on the needs of the other person allows both parties to experience and learn whether a future is possible. Sex and money should not be exchanged on the first meet but the suggestion of what that would be is okay. I’ll flirt and show a bit of my sexuality, you hint at the way you would like to take care of me. If it works with the chemistry and the potential, set up another meet and before that time, discuss the arrangement expectations. Work for you?

  30. lisa says:

    Funny thing is i get alot of male attention even though I am older. I am hiding from 2 men in my apartment complex. Unfortunately neither is a sugardaddy and both probably have less than me because they have children from relationships to support. One guy gave me 25 dollars during the hurricane and then he was up knocking on my door at midnight thinkin I was going to invite him in. He still tries to hit on me but he’s not my type, he has kids by diffrent women and smokes pot. the other is the cleaning man at my apartment who is probably looking for a greencard. As well as a number of guys I come across in everyday life that are looking for some action but are dirt poor. I need a way to attract sugardaddies like I do these losers.

  31. lisa says:

    I would like to do that but how do I keep my energy when I haven’t had a decent meal and just feel like going home? I have been on some good dates where they guys have taken me shopping but I have been on some dates where the guy won’t even buy coffee and I’m thinking all along that I wish I could disappear and go home.

  32. BlondeinNYC says:

    You have to compartmentalize things; you need to take your worries and lock them in a place in your mind so that when you go out, you’re sweet, charming, funny and a terrific Lisa. Not a Lisa who is having problems. If I spent 24/7 thinking about all the things I’m dealing with, I couldn’t get anything done. And trust me on this, there are days when I don’t want to get out of bed.

    But you have to present yourself as a delicious catch, not something or someone scary.

  33. lisa says:

    also he is not spending anything to travel to meet me. He is in my town on business and has place to stay already.

  34. lisa says:

    I can understand not being too needy but how do I go about being charming and all of that when I have so many things on my mind.
    What do I tell a potential sd who is is no hurry to help financially when I haven’t eaten a decent meal lately and don’t feel like having sex or I can take a short trip because my rent hasn’t been paid and my apartment might be locked up when I get back.
    I would worry about spending money on busfare but I don’t have any to spend. I will have to start walking 2 miles to work and back starting next week so i really don’t have the money to spend to just spend to meet some guy for a chat.

  35. BerkshireSD says:

    Don’t expect first meetings to solve your problems. If you do, you are in for a string of disappointing, empty or unhappy experiences with poor SD candidates.

    If you want to get something to bring home on the first meeting, be something he wants to show interest and commitment to. Make him want to give you a little something because you’ve charmed and entertained him and he wants you to come back to him again.

    A good way for prospective SBs to greatly reduce the chances of meeting and making a lasting and beneficial arrangement with a quality SD is to be asking for money on the first meeting. If you want to collect 200 or 800 on a first meeting in return for some company and sex, that’s another story, but then you are closer to just looking for a John and the types of men you will receive will mostly be at the lower end.

    An SBs problems, particularly on a first meeting, are her own. They are not the SDs responsibility. The SDs responsibility is to provide you with the benefits you desire in a man and ultimately agree upon, including money, sophisticated and enjoyable companionship, respect, kindness, etc. An SB’s responsibility is to be someone the prospective SD wants to spend his time with. Concentrate on his needs and what you can provide and make those things apparent. You will not sell yourself as someone that needs her bills paid, but you will sell yourself as a good conversationalist or a warm companion or knowledgable about some subject or a good cook or a desireable lover. You will sell yourself as someone attentive, available, attractive, helpful, caring, etc. in whatever mix you can.

    Listen to and explore what the SD can offer in the long run if you want to make a solid and stable arrangement. The SD should be indicating what he offers on many levels – an SD is not an ATM, he has the potential to provide essentially any benefit that an SB might provide, predominantly with the exception of money. SDs can provide satisfying sex for example, which SBs often assume is a benefit they are providing exclusively.

    Don’t grouse about spending six bucks and an hour on the city bus to meet an SD that might provide thousands of dollars and other value in benefits over a lengthy and satisfying relationship. You don’t complain about traveling to a job interview. You can’t meet someone worthwhile without putting in effort. The SD is spending significant money to travel and entertain you on the first meeting and his time invested in the meeting is just as important as yours.

  36. lisa says:

    I always heard that if you were willing to work, you could have a job but it seems like when I get a job that is good, good pay, good hours (days and no nights of having to walk home), good people, no stress, etc, and now I can’t get any hours. I have to cut out everything in the next couple weeks just to pay november rent, no food, nothing, so I need to meet me a sugardaddy to cheer me up. Like when I was out of work, I was down but I managed to find 2 sds within a week’s time that took me shoppping, no cash , but at least i got some new stuff to cheer me up. Bad thing is even though i’m hardly working , I am working almost everyday which keeps me from having much time to meet anyone during the daylight. By the time I come home from work, shower, and put on something nice, it will be after 4 pm and I don’t like to be out after dark until I can trust a guy to bring me home.
    I also found money in the store again today , just like I did at my last job, and took it to the customer center, didn’t think once about keeping it, and just like the last time I was honest, I had nothing but bad luck afterwards. Today I got my hours cut and on the way home I missed the bus by a minute. so much for karma.

  37. BlondeinNYC says:

    Lisa, I have nightmares every night.

  38. lisa says:

    how do you manage to keep a roof over your head? Where I live if you don’t pay your rent on time, they charge alot extra and if you don’t pay by the 9th, they lock you out of your apartment. I would hate to come home from work and find myself locked out especially where I live, I have horrible neighbors.
    everytime I get a job, I get one that cuts hours. this ones pays better than my last but after union dues, and the increased bus fare ) I am making less with these cut hours. I used to spend 16 month on bus fare to work and a coworker would bring me home at night, now I will be spening 50 a month on busfare to go to and from a 4 hour a day job.
    And the guy I am talking to is kindn of going around the allowance discussion and said we need to meet and talk first. i am wondering if I should meet him at all as he might be a time waster.

  39. BlondeinNYC says:

    Lisa, I feel for you. I’m behind in my rent and a job I thought I had turned out to be a big fat nothing. I have $1.53 in my checking account and spend most of my time job hunting. I don’t have all my rent for October, none for November and the utilities are going to be turned off.
    Hang in there.

  40. lisa says:

    Hi everyone. Well i’m in a real mess again. I have been cut down to working 20 hours at my new job but of course I still work 5 days, so no saving on traveling expenses. I liked this job and was going to make good money but now with no hours plus paying big union dues that are mandatory, although I don’t see anything being in a union is doing for me, still got my hours but, well anyway I have agreed to meet a guy who I talked to last week. He will be in town this coming week. I have to try to find time to meet him because even thougoh I have no work hours, I have to work almost everyday this week for 4 hours and with going to and from , most of my day will be gone and I do like to meet people for the first time during the day. can’t meet them on the weekend because I still have to work weekends. Anyway I need some advice on going about asking for assistance from him. I have already been upfront with him on my first email response to him becuase he mentioned sex, so I have nothing to lose by mentioning support. He says he understands and appreciates that I am intelligent and know what I want. but how and when should I bring it up as I want to let him know I expect some kind of cash gift on the first meeting, not for frills but just to be able to pay my rent and electric next month as I am in a situation where I can’t afford to buy groceries anymore if I want to pay my bills. I am going to have to spend money on bus fare that I really don’t have to meet this man and I would like to know I am going to get a little something for my effort, and well anyway it will be alot easier for me to relax and be at ease and enjoy his company if I am not worrying about rent.
    thanks for your advice, as I am about to have to lower my standards if things don’t work as I have learned that hard work isn’t going to pay the bills, employers dont’ appreciate you and don’t allow you to work enough to pay your basic bills.

  41. lisa says:

    I don’t get many emails but they seem to come in groups of 3 and then weeks go by. I have gotten lucky a few times and out of several bad ones, found one that wanted to actually meet , and although things didnt’ work out past the first meeting, they did spoil me on the first meeting so it was worth my time.

  42. BlondeinNYC says:

    At least you’re getting emails. I’m not, and I haven’t had a non-porn reply in awhile.

  43. lisa says:

    I can’t believe how guys refuse to discuss finances but are upfront about what they want. Why would I get involved with some married guy and give up any opportunity to have a boyfriend and devote all my time to this guy and not get anything in return. I guess alot of these guys think that giving us ladies the opportunity to spend time with them is the sugar, rather than actually give anything of value. that’s 2 flakes for me today, I need a real sd offer, not some guy who has put on a sd costume for holloween

  44. BlondeinNYC says:

    Lisa- if I had a dime for every email like that…..and yes, I get emails from guys who claim on their profile they are in the same city as me, but aren’t. Any relationship is a two way street.

    It’s like what I wrote somewhere else on this blog; a lot of SDs and SD wannabes are on and have been on this site for awhile because (1) they think it’s an escort site and they keep getting shot down, so they figure the next person they email will be one and (2)unreasonable expectations. They think that they can do anything to us because we women aren’t human. They also think we’re dumb, so like the other group, they keep sending out email after email not comprehending that we are smart not dumb, and that we’re human beings.

  45. lisa says:

    Ok I just heard from another sd that I wrote. WOW they are starting to come in again, but they are duds. :( This gentleman wants to see someone on regular monthly basis for a few days each time. He is married and is looking for a woman who will be loyal and only see him (keep in mind he is married, so he has someone else but doesn’t want a sb to be able to have a boyfriend0, he is upfront about wanting lots of sex and if he things we are compatible and get along for a while , THEN he will help out a little financially. Yea right, well why don’t we just be friends for a few months before we have sex to see if we get along. notice that he wants to get started on his benefits but wants to take it slow to decide whether he wants to return the benefit. I am being hit by hurricane loser sugardaddy here. someone send me a real sugardaddy, it will be my birthday in less than a month.

  46. lisa says:

    Am I the only one who comes across so many sds that say they live in a particular area and they actually don’t? I don’t know how many guys I have written or been contacted by that listed my city as where they are and then it turns out they live in another state, or as the response I got this morning, they live in another country! I choose local sds because I think it woudl be easier to meet but it seems like they are live somewhere else and just come to my city occasionally which would not work for me because I can’t just take off work when they happen to come into town.
    What is it with these sds that lie about where they are??

    When I read my latest email from an sd that supposedly lived in Houston but actually lives in another country ( he didnt’ even mention which country) I just deleted him as I am not interested in a guy who lives out of the country, he might be a scammer

  47. sugarbabygirl says:

    hey everyone.. so I am in the process of getting a sugar daddy and I was just wondering if any of you sugar baby’s wouldnt mind letting me in on the spoilings which you recieve or if you sugar daddys want to reply..what spoilings you give.
    I would be really intersted to know as I know that it can vary A LOT.

  48. MSH says:

    JetSetBaby: Please, please, please……this man did not like you. He did not respect you. He used you. I am sorry if my words are hurtful. I do not mean for them to be hurtful to you, but mean them to just be what I see as the truth.

    DO NOT spend one more second of your precious time on this LIAR.

    You have much better things to do. Spend your precious time on your son and yourself, but not someone who does not do what he says he will.

    They get ONE chance with me. ONE. That is it. My time is too valueable.

    Everybody, repeat the above sentence again and again……….It will save you your self respect and not give the “players” opportunity to hone their craft.

    There are REAL SDs out there. There really are. Don’t settle for anything less than that.

  49. ChicBaby says:

    I actually spent New Years Eve and Day last year (or this year, I suppose really) alone. All my friends had gone home for holiday break, and I work in an office so we had three days off. I went to the gym, rented a TON of movies, and took the time to really cook instead of just throwing pasta and Ragu together like normal! It was fantastic! Sure, tons of my friends were out partying and living it up, but I was happy to just sit there and be alone for a bit.
    Honestly, I love my friends, but some times (ok, a lot of the time) I like to be alone. I’m a big reader and a bit of a movie buff. I also am really comfortable with myself and who I am, and I think that has a lot to do with it. I’m perfectly fine left alone to my thoughts.

  50. lisa says:

    Oddly I had the best Christmas ever last year and I spent it alone. I had got into it with my mom and daughter, they were mad because I had no money to buy gifts (I was only working 20 hours a week and behind on everything) they did not want to see me. I had started dating a new guy who was spending the day with his family, not a problem since we had only dated for 3 weeks at the time. I ended up being off Christmas day and the next two days so I had kind of a vacation from work, 20 hours was still stressful working at that place. I got home early on christmas eve as the store was really slow (not many shoppers in an office store on christmas eve) I spent the 3 days cleaning out my closet, organizing my kitchen, and eating all the goodies my boyfriend had given me and then going shopping the next day with the money he gave me for christmas. I spent the 3 days alone but did her from him and everyone else via email and ended up having a really nice christmas after all, well all the goodies and candy made it better. lol I had a great new years as I spent it with my boyfriend and his family.
    This year I will talk to my family on the phone probably, whenever I gethome from work and spend the time with the pigeon that I have handraised. It will be just him and me, hopefully with a little cash to spend from a sugar daddy, I hope

  51. ChicBaby says:

    JetSetBaby – Wow, it’s pretty amazing that this man expects you to still want to see him after all that, especially after talking with your best friend! I agree with bostonTerrier that he must like you a lot, but at the same time he must not think very highly of your intelligence to keep trying without giving anything in return. Thanks for a great cautionary tale!!
    Personally, I would keep the lines of communication open, just in case he comes through, but I would not see him again unless he does.

    As far as the holidays are concerned, I spend a couple of days at home every year, like dreamer, splitting my time between a couple of groups thanks to divorce! I don’t mind it though, expect for buying all the presents. I usually make a lot of mine (I crochet and sew a fair amount) to try and save money. Last year I didn’t see my SD that week, but the next time I saw him he had a very nice gift for me! It was so sweet.
    We will just have to see if I have an SD this year!
    I’m meeting with one man tomorrow for coffee and another Friday night for dinner. Both seem very nice, but we haven’t talked specifics yet, and having chemistry is so necessary for me. Hopefully things go well!

    I saw someone else post it on another page, but has anyone heard back yet about the free SA Party tickets? I really really want to go, but haven’t brought it up to any of the men I’ve been talking to yet…

  52. bostonTerrier says:

    on the bright side – you know that he really liked you!

  53. JetSetBaby says:

    The weird thing is even though i haven’t gotten paid and basically made it clear that i don’t intend to continue this relationship until he comes through on his end.. He’s still hitting me up asking me to go out with him this weekend.. And my best friend oof course telling her not to tell me.. Uhhhh does he not know what best friends are? We tell each other everything.. What a nutcase! I swear all the crazy guys find me.. My ex SD turned out to be a total nutcase too and compulsive liar!!! Only so much BS a girl can deal with!

  54. bostonTerrier says:

    that is sad jetsetbaby. hopefully you’ve stopped talking to him? i definitely would.

    recently i get a guy from here – significantly older than myself and my parents for that matter – who mentioned how he was looking for someone to put in his will. he has no one to leave everything to. while it would be a lot, that freaked me out. i’m sure he can find a charity. i told him i wasn’t interested and that i wasn’t going to fix my schedule so i could see him 4 times a week [something else he’d like] AND her would prefer if i didn’t date anyone else unless they were contributing to me financially. talk about demanding. oh, and he’s only sent a million emails since my polite, “no thank you.”

    onto this topic … i spend all holidays at home :) i can’t imagine not. my sisters and i have already planned it our for when we’re older with our own families. i’ve never had an sd during the holiday season … i wouldn’t expect them to impact my holidays or vice-versa though.

  55. lisa says:

    when anyone starts making excuses I stop believing them. I have came across many guys on this site that make one crazy excuse after another on why they can meet yet. And as far as a man who doesn’t keep his word and pay an allowance when promised but still expects you keep up your part, the guy is wasting your time and has no intention of being a sd.

  56. BlondeinNYC says:

    JestSetBaby – too bad you can’t take him to small claims court for expenses…or can you….lol! Hmm, if he claims that you’re on his payrol…
    Seriously, it’s best to move on, and it’s really awful that he pulled that on you. Remember what comes around goes around. You might not see his comeuppance, but it’s there.

  57. cre8tor says:

    JetSetBaby: That is AWFUL!!! Probably better to move on. I had something similar happen to me. When they start making excuses, its not real. We all hope and hang in there just in case the excuses are real but most often they aren’t. What a jerk!

  58. BlondeinNYC says:

    Hi Stephan! yes, family is exactly what you make it and friends can be the best family you’ve ever created!

    I love the idea of a reality show…no one has contacted me yet on that site, so we’ll see!

    Stephan can you take a gander at my profile and tell me if you think I ought to tweak anything? I’m really tired of getting escort type emails :)

    Profile Number 233868

    Thanks in advance

  59. JetSetBaby says:

    VENT VENT VENT!!!!!

    So i’ve been seeing this guy in a sugar relationshipf ro the past month and a half.. Seemed too perfect at first he wanted to talk about my expectations up front.. I told him i had a son and that came first also told him my financial expectations.. he said everything seemed sooo perfect and wanted me to start immediately.. And he would put me on the payroll.. I started on September 1st and he said i should be paid by the 15th and the 30th at the VERY latest!!! So here it is October 15th and excuse after excuse.. He still hasn’t come through. I feel like such an idiot.. I’ve hired a sitter to come watch my son about 3 times a week to see him and have gone out on the town with him a couple times.. (Which was initially off limits as my son is very young)

    So i still haven’t gotten my “payroll check” He keeps saying he’s added a large bonus because of how long its taken to get to me.. He said it would come in the mail and last week when i told him i still hadn’t recieved it, he “did some research” and found out my check somehow got sent to Arizona.. So Monday he was sick and wanted me to once again find a sitter for my young son and drive across town to see him.. I basically said i didn’t feel comfortable doing that until i was sure he’d come through with his part of the deal.. He blows my phone up like crazy.. Basically asking me to leave my family and come be his full time live in girlfriend.. Are you an idiot?!? UGH!!! Sooo annoyed!!! Big vent.. Also he texts my best friend behind my back telling her to not let me know he’s contacting her but he’d love to see her on the side… EWWW!! And also complaining to her that for as much money as he’s putting out for me he doesn’t thing he’s getting much in return lately?!?!

    Is he on crack? I haven’t received a penny from him. I’ve put out more money to see this jerk.. Even having to buy new professional clothes for when i visit him at work… Between babysitting and gas i’ve already put out a few hundred dollars.. So i’m thinking i’ll count this as a loss.. As i’m almost ready to give up on the whole SD thing altogether.. My last relationship was great but i think its too much work and bs to even attempt to find something that works so well again..

    I did recently meet a guy from the site and he wants to meet soon, we’ve talked on the phone and so far it seems great.. Too good to be true once again? Who knows. But i know I wont be fooled again..

    UGH

  60. Stephan says:

    This will be my second holiday season spent alone. Ah well, family is what you make it?… Sugar family for me this season! How ’bout a Sugar Daddy Secret Santa gift exchange??? Wouldn’t that be cute? Dunno, just a thought. I feel for all who will be facing down another Valentines, Christmas, Thanksgiving alone… but you’re not alone, cuz we’re ALL alone 😉

    We should get you a reality show for your new dating premise BlondeiNYC! “The Beard”! What do you think?

  61. BlondeinNYC says:

    Thanks Sally. To tell you the truth you get used to it for awhile. At least I’m not subjected to crazy family Thanksgiving dinners.

  62. dreamer says:

    i have extensive family that all want to spend time with me, but many do not like each other so i have to split time between them all. And that is a lot of gifts. I would love to spend xmas slone for once

  63. Sally says:

    BlondeiNYC: I feel ya hun!

  64. BlondeinNYC says:

    I don’t have a family;everyone’s dead. I have a dog and friends. And a really short gift list :)

  65. sweetpea says:

    Lisa your comment above and the one I posted made me feel sad..I would like to talk to you privately if all possible. Will you please contact me?

    Below is what a SB wrote and this is what I was talking about earlier!

    The holidays are always a difficult time for me. My family is out of town, all my friends are romantically connected and my SD is married. Most are involved with family and friends and have little time to see the SB. For me, this, is one of the reasons a SD helps out financially. Not only to help with the material needs but also to help during those emotional and personal times when he cannot be there. It’s not a substitute, but it helps a bit

  66. lisa says:

    the holidays are difficult for me too. I can’t spend much time with my family even though we live within a mile of each other. None of us have cars and the public transport sucks on holidays and with the neighborhood being really unsafe, we can’t be out past dark, which on the holidays that means after 6 pm. My dad has difficulty getting out and I am not welcome at my family’s home because they are really old fashioned and kind of turned their back on me when I started dating someone (they think that if you are divorced, you have to spend the rest of your life alone). On top of that I work in retail which makes me hate the holidays and this year I will be working thanksgiving and christmas so no holiday time for me.
    As far as a sugardaddy, I wouldn’t expect him to spend time with me on the holidays if he was married or even single, but an additional financial gift would make me loneliness go away. And besides the best sales start after christmas. I have dated a married man before and we did email each other on the holidays but usually didint’ see each other the entire week of the holiday.

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